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1
00:00:02,402 --> 00:00:04,237
'Jackie, I..
I think it's best that I'
2
00:00:04,337 --> 00:00:06,172
'that-that I'd be
straight with you.'
3
00:00:06,239 --> 00:00:09,576
'I'm just, I'm just not
happy any longer and'
4
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:13,913
'and I'm leaving you...for
Stanley High.'
5
00:00:15,515 --> 00:00:18,518
Pam, turn the channel,
this is just too depressing.
6
00:00:18,585 --> 00:00:20,987
- Can't take it.
- What a dog!
7
00:00:21,054 --> 00:00:22,822
After she bailed him outta jail
8
00:00:22,889 --> 00:00:25,091
put his behind
through schooling.
9
00:00:25,191 --> 00:00:27,694
He just gonna
leave her for a man!
10
00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:30,096
- It's just wrong.
- That ain't right.
11
00:00:32,065 --> 00:00:34,334
One, two, three!
12
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:37,270
Baby, what happen?
13
00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:40,106
I sprained my ankle
playing ball, Gina.
14
00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:42,275
Oh, Martin, let me see it,
alright. Let me see it.
15
00:00:42,375 --> 00:00:43,877
- Ah!
- Oh, alright, Martin.
16
00:00:43,943 --> 00:00:46,413
- Gina, be careful it hurts.
- Okay, baby, wait.
17
00:00:46,513 --> 00:00:49,115
Stop your whining, will ya?
18
00:00:49,215 --> 00:00:50,884
I can't hear the TV.
19
00:00:53,553 --> 00:00:56,289
Well, whatever you watching,
please turn it off.
20
00:00:56,389 --> 00:00:58,892
I hate to see a grown man cry.
21
00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:02,429
Baby, your ankle
is really swollen.
22
00:01:02,529 --> 00:01:04,230
Baby, I wanna take you
to a doctor.
23
00:01:04,297 --> 00:01:07,700
No, Gina, I ain't tryin'
to go to no doctor.
24
00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:09,803
J-just take me to mom's house
and she'll hook me up
25
00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:12,038
with one of them home remedies
and I'll be straight.
26
00:01:12,105 --> 00:01:14,407
No, Martin, I don't think
you should walk on that, man.
27
00:01:14,474 --> 00:01:17,710
I'm not.
You're gonna carry me, Scoopy.
28
00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:23,450
You think she could hook you up
with a face lift?
29
00:01:24,884 --> 00:01:29,489
No, but she can lift that tart
off your teeth.
30
00:01:29,589 --> 00:01:32,492
Martin, I sold you about
showboating and showing off.
31
00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:34,394
How did you do this to yourself?
32
00:01:34,461 --> 00:01:35,662
Oh, Gina.
33
00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:36,896
Baby, I was flying
through the air
34
00:01:36,963 --> 00:01:38,565
like Michael Jordon, right.
35
00:01:38,631 --> 00:01:41,401
I did one of them
reverse slam dunks, boom!
36
00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:45,505
Came down and landed on
my ankle all wrong, Gina.
37
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:48,274
Then he woke up from his dream.
38
00:01:48,341 --> 00:01:50,510
The man was running
down the court..
39
00:01:50,610 --> 00:01:52,345
...tripped on his show laces.
40
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:55,081
That's how he twisted his ankle.
41
00:01:55,148 --> 00:01:56,783
You know what?
It's a good thing
42
00:01:56,850 --> 00:01:58,751
shorty didn't have
too far to fall.
43
00:01:58,818 --> 00:02:01,254
He really could've gotten hurt.
44
00:02:01,321 --> 00:02:03,523
Good thing it wasn't you, Pam.
45
00:02:03,623 --> 00:02:05,525
You know,
when horses hurt a leg
46
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:07,360
they take 'em out in the pasture
47
00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:10,630
and let off a few rounds.
48
00:02:12,632 --> 00:02:15,869
- Ow! Ow! Ow!
- Oh, see! Martin!
49
00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:17,704
Pam, don't upset him!
50
00:02:50,737 --> 00:02:54,174
No, Mama Payne,
I did not trip Martin.
51
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:55,875
Ugh.
52
00:02:55,975 --> 00:02:58,545
Look, look, look.
He really did hurt himself
53
00:02:58,645 --> 00:02:59,979
on the basketball court and..
54
00:03:00,046 --> 00:03:02,248
Y-yes, I..
55
00:03:02,348 --> 00:03:07,754
Yes, I do realize you'll knock
my teeth out, I understand that.
56
00:03:07,854 --> 00:03:10,390
Miss.. Mama Payne, you're
fadin'. You're fading.
57
00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:13,359
I'm sorry, I can't hear you.
58
00:03:13,426 --> 00:03:15,995
I'm going through tunnel.
59
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,231
What was that all about?
60
00:03:18,331 --> 00:03:20,366
Ugh, Martin's mother
tripping as usual.
61
00:03:20,433 --> 00:03:22,835
She won't let him come home
for a whole 24 hours.
62
00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:25,271
You're lucky. Usually you
have to pay an exterminator
63
00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:27,240
to get rid of pests.
64
00:03:28,575 --> 00:03:29,742
Watch your mouth, Pam.
65
00:03:29,842 --> 00:03:31,211
That's my man
you're talking about
66
00:03:31,277 --> 00:03:32,879
I'm gonna miss him
for a whole day.
67
00:03:32,946 --> 00:03:34,113
Remember, we're newlyweds.
68
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:36,516
We still have some
honeymooning to do.
69
00:03:36,583 --> 00:03:39,219
Don't make me throw up along.
70
00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:41,921
- Shut up!
- Oh, Gina..
71
00:03:42,021 --> 00:03:43,590
Why don't you come
to the movies with me
72
00:03:43,690 --> 00:03:45,225
to take your mind off baddy boy?
73
00:03:45,291 --> 00:03:47,193
That sounds cool.
What's playing?
74
00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:48,528
Well, let's see, uh
75
00:03:48,595 --> 00:03:51,931
"Dennis The Menace II Society"
is playing.
76
00:03:52,031 --> 00:03:53,866
Nah, I heard that was whack.
77
00:03:53,933 --> 00:03:55,902
Oh, Gina, look,
"The Love Jones Connection"
78
00:03:55,969 --> 00:03:57,804
is doin' a live show
from Detroit.
79
00:03:57,904 --> 00:03:59,272
Ooh, Pam, you should try out.
80
00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:01,608
Maybe you could
finally find a man.
81
00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:07,981
I'm sorry, it slipped,
girl, I'm just playin'.
82
00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,617
You know that song by D'Angelo
called "Brown Sugar?"
83
00:04:10,717 --> 00:04:13,820
- Uh-huh.
- That was about me.
84
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,655
So, I don't know what all the
running up and down..
85
00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:19,492
Ooh! Excuse me,
"Brown Sugar" baby.
86
00:04:19,592 --> 00:04:22,262
I'm sorry. Just find out
what movie you wanna see
87
00:04:22,328 --> 00:04:23,763
so we can get outta here.
88
00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:26,132
Oh, okay, we could see
"Jurassic Trailer Park"
89
00:04:26,232 --> 00:04:27,500
I hear it's all that.
90
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,335
Cool. Cool.
What time does it start?
91
00:04:29,435 --> 00:04:31,170
Ooh, girl, in 15 minutes.
We gotta go.
92
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:33,606
- Alright. Alright. Oh, girl!
- Hurry up.
93
00:04:33,673 --> 00:04:35,575
I haven't been the movie
in a while.
94
00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:41,014
That's alright.
95
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:45,251
Y'all don't have to feel sorry
for me in my time of need.
96
00:04:45,318 --> 00:04:48,021
Alright, alright, Sheneneh.
What's the problem?
97
00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:49,956
Did press on nails
go outta business?
98
00:04:51,624 --> 00:04:54,160
- What?
- You know I'm right.
99
00:04:54,260 --> 00:04:56,262
Wait, wait, Pam.
Pam, wait a minute.
100
00:04:56,329 --> 00:04:57,964
Sheneneh, what's wrong
with you, girl?
101
00:04:58,031 --> 00:05:01,701
Yeah, Sheneneh, you never let me
get away with snappin' on you.
102
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,636
Don't try to act like
you all care about me.
103
00:05:03,703 --> 00:05:07,106
'Cause I damn sure
don't care about you all.
104
00:05:07,173 --> 00:05:11,344
Oh, come on now, Sheneneh,
we care.
105
00:05:11,444 --> 00:05:13,546
- We care.
- I don't care.
106
00:05:13,646 --> 00:05:15,548
Look, come on, tell us
what's up. Come on.
107
00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:18,985
Well, since y'all are so nosy,
I'll tell you.
108
00:05:19,052 --> 00:05:21,821
- No.
- My man Lafonze..
109
00:05:21,888 --> 00:05:25,058
Got back with his
second baby..
110
00:05:28,127 --> 00:05:30,396
Sheneneh, I am so sorry
to hear that, girl.
111
00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:34,534
Gina, hello, we do not have
time for this drama.
112
00:05:34,634 --> 00:05:37,236
Look, look, we can get to the
real drama at the movie.
113
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:38,838
We gotta go.
I don't trust her anyway.
114
00:05:38,905 --> 00:05:40,073
It's a trick.
115
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,475
Duh! Duh!
116
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,144
No, you cannot..
117
00:05:45,211 --> 00:05:47,313
You are the trick.
118
00:05:47,380 --> 00:05:49,649
I've been cracking myself up.
119
00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:51,217
I just need..
120
00:05:55,054 --> 00:05:57,490
- Something wrong with that girl
- Oh, Sheneneh..
121
00:05:57,557 --> 00:05:58,925
Come on, now..
122
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:01,728
There are plenty of men
out there, now stop.
123
00:06:01,828 --> 00:06:05,264
Yeah, so work it out.
We gotta go.
124
00:06:10,937 --> 00:06:14,774
Oh, Sheneneh,
don't cry, alright?
125
00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:17,410
Look, look.. Oh, I got an idea,
we was just talking about
126
00:06:17,510 --> 00:06:19,278
"Love Jones Connection"
is coming to Detroit
127
00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:20,847
why don't you try it out.
128
00:06:20,913 --> 00:06:22,382
That's my favorite show.
129
00:06:22,448 --> 00:06:25,351
They be hooking you up with
dates, money, everything.
130
00:06:25,418 --> 00:06:27,453
Yeah, see, you should audition.
131
00:06:27,553 --> 00:06:28,788
Alright, Gina, let's go.
132
00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:30,123
- We gotta go. Peace.
- Alright.
133
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,091
Yeah, I guess, you're right.
134
00:06:32,191 --> 00:06:34,527
Because, see, if Lafonze
see me on TV
135
00:06:34,594 --> 00:06:37,730
with a duffle bag,
he'll come running back.
136
00:06:37,797 --> 00:06:40,533
And somebody may get shot.
137
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:42,702
But he'll be back.
138
00:06:43,536 --> 00:06:45,138
He'll be back.
139
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,807
Look, Sheneneh, look,
here's the address.
140
00:06:47,907 --> 00:06:49,942
Now, we got to go before
we miss the beginning
141
00:06:50,042 --> 00:06:51,244
of "Jurassic Trailer Park."
142
00:06:51,310 --> 00:06:52,578
- Okay, bye.
- Bye.
143
00:06:52,645 --> 00:06:54,914
Ooh, you know that
movie is so good.
144
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:56,482
Especially the ending.
145
00:06:56,582 --> 00:07:00,153
When the dinosaurs come by
and do a drive by on everybody.
146
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:02,989
Sheneneh, why
would you tell us?!
147
00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:05,258
Gina, that's it!
I had it with this girl!
148
00:07:05,324 --> 00:07:06,626
Yes, I told the ending.
149
00:07:06,726 --> 00:07:08,394
So what are you gonna do?
150
00:07:08,461 --> 00:07:11,898
Punks jump up to get beat down.
151
00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:13,766
- Alright..
- Yo, why are you..
152
00:07:13,833 --> 00:07:15,234
- It is on!
- Pam!
153
00:07:25,578 --> 00:07:26,913
How y'all do?
154
00:07:27,814 --> 00:07:29,415
How y'all do?
155
00:07:30,483 --> 00:07:33,119
I'm Sheneneh Jenkins.
156
00:07:35,955 --> 00:07:38,157
Oh, it's like that, huh?
157
00:07:39,859 --> 00:07:41,294
Excuse me.
158
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:44,630
But is this where you sign up
for the "Love Jones Connection?"
159
00:07:44,697 --> 00:07:47,266
Do I look like I work here?
160
00:07:49,001 --> 00:07:50,603
No, but you look
like you're about
161
00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:52,705
to get your ass kicked, uh-huh.
162
00:07:52,805 --> 00:07:55,274
I am not the one, okay?
So you better run Teena Marie.
163
00:07:55,341 --> 00:07:57,276
I am not the one.
164
00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:09,222
- Excuse me.
- Hm?
165
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,958
But are you trying out for the
"Love Jones Connection" too?
166
00:08:12,024 --> 00:08:13,826
Yes, I thought
I would give it a try.
167
00:08:13,893 --> 00:08:18,731
Oh, well, you better
try a new dress.
168
00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:20,233
You-you don't like it?
169
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,201
As a dress, no.
170
00:08:22,301 --> 00:08:25,037
But as a table cloth,
oh, it's dope.
171
00:08:25,838 --> 00:08:27,073
I better go change.
172
00:08:27,173 --> 00:08:28,741
Oh, yeah, go ahead
why don't you do that.
173
00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:31,878
I think the Salvation Army
is still open.
174
00:08:31,978 --> 00:08:34,714
See you.
I think it's that way.
175
00:08:36,682 --> 00:08:38,918
Hi, I'm Rene.
176
00:08:39,018 --> 00:08:40,853
What's your name?
177
00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:42,421
Sheneneh, why?
178
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:44,924
"Sheneneh Why."
179
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:47,927
That's a funny name.
180
00:08:48,027 --> 00:08:51,163
My name's almost like that
except mine's with an R.
181
00:08:51,230 --> 00:08:54,934
Ooh, I guess,
I would be Reneneh.
182
00:08:56,102 --> 00:08:57,203
With that shiny nose
183
00:08:57,270 --> 00:08:59,939
they need to call you Rudolph.
184
00:09:00,039 --> 00:09:02,441
Oh, girl, is it really that bad?
185
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:03,910
Oh, girl, it's worse.
186
00:09:04,010 --> 00:09:06,679
It look like you powdered
your nose with Armor All.
187
00:09:06,746 --> 00:09:08,381
Oh, no.
I..
188
00:09:08,447 --> 00:09:10,049
I-I gotta go take care of this.
189
00:09:10,116 --> 00:09:12,051
Thanks, Sheneneh Why.
190
00:09:17,089 --> 00:09:18,424
Terry Hicks?
191
00:09:18,524 --> 00:09:19,692
No.
192
00:09:19,759 --> 00:09:21,627
Okay. Darice Rollins?
193
00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:23,396
No.
194
00:09:23,462 --> 00:09:25,231
Shanana?
195
00:09:25,298 --> 00:09:26,299
Hold up, okay?
196
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:27,800
The name is Sheneneh.
197
00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:30,403
You wouldn't wanna
get it, right, uh-uh.
198
00:09:30,469 --> 00:09:32,204
Okay?
199
00:09:32,271 --> 00:09:34,640
Well, I guess,
no other ladies showed up.
200
00:09:34,740 --> 00:09:35,942
Oh, they showed up.
201
00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:37,710
But they were toe up
from the floor up
202
00:09:37,777 --> 00:09:41,080
almost made me throw up.
203
00:09:41,147 --> 00:09:44,116
Well, since you're the only
one here, I guess you're on.
204
00:09:44,216 --> 00:09:46,485
What? Me?
205
00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:48,054
Oh, my goodness.
206
00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:49,322
Oh, my goodness!
207
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,657
I'm gonna me on the
"Love Jones Connect."
208
00:09:51,757 --> 00:09:53,326
I'm gonna me on the
"Love Jones Connect."
209
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:55,895
I gotta call Laquita now!
210
00:09:55,962 --> 00:09:57,063
Oh!
211
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:01,667
Laquita!
212
00:10:04,804 --> 00:10:07,273
Baby, change the channel,
we're gonna miss Sheneneh.
213
00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:10,643
Sheneneh's cool, Gina, but
this is much better baby.
214
00:10:10,743 --> 00:10:12,244
What the hell?!
215
00:10:12,311 --> 00:10:16,082
Martin, I thought I told you
to cancel the Playboy channel.
216
00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:19,685
I will, after it goes off, Gina.
217
00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:24,924
Damn, how she do that?
218
00:10:27,093 --> 00:10:28,794
I'm changing this channel.
219
00:10:28,861 --> 00:10:31,497
You ain't watching that
no more, that's it.
220
00:10:31,597 --> 00:10:33,666
- Hey, Sheneneh on yet?
- Oh, hey, wassup?
221
00:10:33,766 --> 00:10:35,034
I wanna see how her date went.
222
00:10:35,134 --> 00:10:37,536
No, but y'all are right on time.
223
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:38,971
Pam, why do you gotta
come over here
224
00:10:39,038 --> 00:10:40,506
and watch our TV all the time?
225
00:10:40,606 --> 00:10:44,777
Oh, my bad.
You can afford one, huh?
226
00:10:44,844 --> 00:10:48,981
You are just so childish.
Why don't you just grow up?
227
00:10:49,048 --> 00:10:51,517
Oh, my bad.
You can't.
228
00:10:52,718 --> 00:10:55,121
Now you see, Gina,
I will let you keep her.
229
00:10:55,187 --> 00:10:56,889
But your Pam got to
stay off the couch.
230
00:10:56,989 --> 00:10:58,791
- Okay. That's it, move over.
- Why don't you..
231
00:10:58,858 --> 00:11:02,495
Mo-mo-move, y'all!
Sheneneh's coming on now.
232
00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:04,063
Y'all shush!
233
00:11:04,163 --> 00:11:06,032
They're here!
234
00:11:06,132 --> 00:11:07,566
'And now the man who's made'
235
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:10,036
'more love connections
than Will Turbolin'
236
00:11:10,136 --> 00:11:12,238
'D'Andre Simpson.'
237
00:11:19,845 --> 00:11:22,081
Hey, what's up, y'all?
I'm D'Andre Simpson
238
00:11:22,181 --> 00:11:24,216
and this is the
"Love Jones Connection."
239
00:11:24,316 --> 00:11:26,986
Now, our first sister says
that she's very much a lady.
240
00:11:27,053 --> 00:11:30,256
'And she says that she likes
a brother that's down.'
241
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,425
'She says if he
disrespects her though'
242
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,694
'she'll beat him like
he stole something.'
243
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:37,263
Please, welcome,
Sheneneh Jenkins.
244
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,367
Alright, alright!
245
00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:43,335
I'm on TV.
I am on TV.
246
00:11:43,402 --> 00:11:45,004
I'd like to say
what's up to Laquita
247
00:11:45,071 --> 00:11:47,273
and all my homies
from around the world.
248
00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:49,208
Hi!
249
00:11:50,609 --> 00:11:52,611
Ah, so, Sheneneh,
tell us what you meant
250
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:55,114
when you said that you
like a brother that's down?
251
00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:57,850
Well, I don't like
those pretty boy types.
252
00:11:57,917 --> 00:11:59,251
I like a brother who
253
00:11:59,351 --> 00:12:02,288
who ain't afraid to
scratch his ass in public.
254
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:04,857
I mean, if it itch, scratch it.
255
00:12:04,924 --> 00:12:06,392
It's yours.
256
00:12:06,459 --> 00:12:07,560
Oh.
257
00:12:07,626 --> 00:12:08,861
Well, the last time
you were here
258
00:12:08,928 --> 00:12:10,362
you picked someone
to go out with.
259
00:12:10,429 --> 00:12:12,298
And we wanna find out
how that date went.
260
00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:15,201
So, please welcome
Valentino Watson.
261
00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:19,972
Yo, wassup, D'Andre?
262
00:12:20,072 --> 00:12:23,309
And how you doin', Sheneneh,
with your fine self?
263
00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:26,445
I'm cool.
How you doin', Valentino?
264
00:12:26,545 --> 00:12:28,614
I'm coolin', baby.
265
00:12:28,714 --> 00:12:31,050
So, Valentino, tell us
how the date got started.
266
00:12:31,117 --> 00:12:32,651
Well, it went
like this, D'Andre.
267
00:12:32,752 --> 00:12:34,820
First I went over to her crib
to pick her up. Right?
268
00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:36,789
But before I got there
I got into a little beef
269
00:12:36,889 --> 00:12:38,991
with this big eared brother
and his bald head partner
270
00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:40,159
from across the hall.
271
00:12:40,259 --> 00:12:42,828
Yo, if I see you punks
again. It's on!
272
00:12:42,928 --> 00:12:44,497
- 'It's on!'
- What?
273
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:48,501
That ain't funny.
Who he calling bald headed?
274
00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:51,504
What's the matter, Tommy,
are bald and blind?
275
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,472
Well, he called you big ears.
276
00:12:53,572 --> 00:12:55,508
Yeah, well, he should've
called me bigfoot.
277
00:12:55,608 --> 00:12:57,076
'Cause he gonna have a problem
pulling my boot out of--
278
00:12:57,143 --> 00:12:59,078
Oh, please, he wouldn't
waste his time
279
00:12:59,145 --> 00:13:00,613
fighting a little ant like you.
280
00:13:00,679 --> 00:13:02,848
You just pray, you ain't
rating, call it a day.
281
00:13:02,948 --> 00:13:04,650
You know what?
You better watch your mouth.
282
00:13:04,750 --> 00:13:05,785
What?
Get up!
283
00:13:05,851 --> 00:13:07,787
- Get up!
- Watch your mouth!
284
00:13:10,856 --> 00:13:13,659
Baby, sit down.
Sit down!
285
00:13:13,759 --> 00:13:15,361
Look what you did!
286
00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:16,529
- Y'all be quiet.
- Shh!
287
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:18,097
So after the
altercation with the
288
00:13:18,164 --> 00:13:20,132
big eared brother,
what happened?
289
00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:22,535
Well, after that I went over
to Sheneneh's crib, right?
290
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,137
Yo, let me just tell you this.
It was mad hoochies in there
291
00:13:25,204 --> 00:13:29,175
all over the place,
I thought I was at Luke's house.
292
00:13:29,275 --> 00:13:31,277
Sheneneh, you knew you were
going out on a date
293
00:13:31,343 --> 00:13:33,946
why'd you have all those
hoochies at your crib?
294
00:13:34,013 --> 00:13:36,515
Well, brothers be
trippy, D'Andre.
295
00:13:36,615 --> 00:13:42,154
So I had all my home girls over
in case he forgot I was a lady.
296
00:13:43,355 --> 00:13:44,723
But you know
self defense, right?
297
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:46,025
Don't you know a little karate?
298
00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:47,726
Oh, no, I don't know karate.
299
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:50,062
But I damn sure know crazy.
300
00:13:50,162 --> 00:13:51,564
Break 'em!
301
00:13:57,636 --> 00:14:00,406
Well, Sheneneh, what did
you think of Valentino
302
00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:02,074
when you first saw him?
303
00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:03,509
Well, I was cool about..
304
00:14:03,576 --> 00:14:05,311
but on the inside, I was like
305
00:14:05,377 --> 00:14:07,880
"Oh, my Goddess.
Oh, my Goddess!
306
00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:10,916
Look at this fine
dark chocolate, black--"
307
00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:13,652
Whoa, hold on now.
Don't forget we're on network TV
308
00:14:13,719 --> 00:14:15,087
so, please watch your language.
309
00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:17,089
Oh, my bad.
My bad.
310
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:18,924
I-I thought this was BET
311
00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:22,695
you know they be saying
whatever they want all day.
312
00:14:22,761 --> 00:14:24,396
So, Valentino,
what did you think
313
00:14:24,496 --> 00:14:25,931
of Sheneneh when you
first saw her?
314
00:14:26,031 --> 00:14:27,666
Well, as soon as I saw her
I was like..
315
00:14:27,733 --> 00:14:30,436
"Unh! Where has she
been my whole life, man?"
316
00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,372
And when she turned around
it was love, I'm telling you.
317
00:14:33,439 --> 00:14:35,941
Oh, Sheneneh got
the kinda ass that
318
00:14:36,041 --> 00:14:37,376
a kinda ass you could
shoot dice on.
319
00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:39,044
You know what I'm saying,
D'Andre?
320
00:14:39,111 --> 00:14:40,412
I know what you're
talking about.
321
00:14:40,512 --> 00:14:42,615
My wife got a little junk
in her trunk too.
322
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:46,719
But Sheneneh, how do you
get your backs like that?
323
00:14:46,785 --> 00:14:51,123
Well, well, I-I been doing
squats at the gym, you know.
324
00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:53,726
I like to stay cute in the face
325
00:14:53,792 --> 00:14:56,428
and thin in the waist.
326
00:14:56,528 --> 00:14:58,130
I heard that, baby.
327
00:14:58,230 --> 00:15:00,299
Don't even think about it,
D'Andre. Uh-huh.
328
00:15:00,399 --> 00:15:02,768
Don't even think about it.
Okay?
329
00:15:02,868 --> 00:15:06,972
Okay. So you went out on a date.
Where'd you go first?
330
00:15:07,072 --> 00:15:09,642
Well, we went over to meet
some of her neighbors.
331
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:10,910
And what did you think of them?
332
00:15:10,976 --> 00:15:11,911
I mean they were alright.
333
00:15:11,977 --> 00:15:13,112
But this girl across the hall
334
00:15:13,212 --> 00:15:16,215
had the biggest
head of all time.
335
00:15:16,282 --> 00:15:18,150
Just big Lou Rawl's head.
336
00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:20,986
I mean, it was ahead of its
time, it was heading this way.
337
00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:23,088
Yo, I feel sorry
for her turtle necks.
338
00:15:23,155 --> 00:15:25,090
I mean, I'm still
having nightmares
339
00:15:25,157 --> 00:15:26,792
about this girl's head.
I just go to bed like.
340
00:15:26,892 --> 00:15:30,296
Oh, head! Head! Head!
341
00:15:32,598 --> 00:15:35,067
- No, he didn't!
- Yes, he did!
342
00:15:35,134 --> 00:15:37,569
He went to your head
on national TV.
343
00:15:37,636 --> 00:15:41,173
"I feel sorry
for her turtle necks!"
344
00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:45,110
Yeah?
And that's two beating
345
00:15:45,177 --> 00:15:47,112
you got coming to you,
Valentino.
346
00:15:47,179 --> 00:15:49,515
- Yeah, boy!
- Uh-huh.
347
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:51,984
My head ain't that big!
348
00:15:55,754 --> 00:15:59,658
Well, that big head
sister sounds pretty scary.
349
00:15:59,758 --> 00:16:01,961
Well, that's nothing.
Her girlfriend's breathe
350
00:16:02,027 --> 00:16:04,330
smell like a bag of armpits.
351
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,199
What?
352
00:16:07,299 --> 00:16:09,368
I can't believe he said that!
353
00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:11,470
- Believe it.
- Believe it.
354
00:16:11,537 --> 00:16:14,173
It's that bad?
355
00:16:14,273 --> 00:16:18,010
Give me a grape.
Give me a grape.
356
00:16:18,110 --> 00:16:19,945
- It's that bad?
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
357
00:16:20,012 --> 00:16:22,848
Well, so far it sounds like
everything was all to the good.
358
00:16:22,948 --> 00:16:24,717
Well, everything was lovely.
359
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:28,220
Until he took me to
that cheap restaurant.
360
00:16:28,320 --> 00:16:32,391
I mean, he didn't even have
class enough to take me inside.
361
00:16:32,491 --> 00:16:35,728
He took me through
the drive-thru, y'all.
362
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,162
Oh.
363
00:16:37,229 --> 00:16:39,231
So what's up with the cheap
364
00:16:39,331 --> 00:16:41,300
restaurant, Valentino?
365
00:16:41,367 --> 00:16:42,901
I don't know why she
complaining to me
366
00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:45,237
I told her she could
super-size it.
367
00:16:45,337 --> 00:16:47,039
- I could super-size what?
- Yes, you could super size.
368
00:16:47,139 --> 00:16:49,341
- You better watch your mouth.
- Now, you know you ain't..
369
00:16:49,408 --> 00:16:50,709
You better watch your mouth.
370
00:16:50,809 --> 00:16:52,211
This is good.
We love it when it gets heated
371
00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:54,580
that keeps the ratings up,
y'all go ahead.
372
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:56,248
So we're chilling in
the parking lot, right
373
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:58,484
getting our super-sized
groove on.
374
00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:01,353
That's when I noticed Sheneneh
was staring at the brother.
375
00:17:01,420 --> 00:17:02,755
That's right, all in here.
376
00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:05,424
H-hold up.
H-hold up, okay? I-I..
377
00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:06,925
Only reason I was staring at you
378
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:08,861
is because you have
food stuck in your teeth.
379
00:17:08,927 --> 00:17:11,263
- That's the only..
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
380
00:17:11,363 --> 00:17:13,165
Yeah, whatever,
whatever, whatever.
381
00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:15,601
Yeah. But being a true magnet
I am, right.
382
00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:19,004
So I put my hand on her nizzy,
then right out of the blue..
383
00:17:19,071 --> 00:17:21,240
Pow! She hit me!
Sheneneh hit me!
384
00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:23,242
She lucky I didn't hit her back.
385
00:17:25,077 --> 00:17:27,946
That's right, D'Andre,
I checked that chin.
386
00:17:28,047 --> 00:17:30,849
'Cause I told you, I'm a lady.
387
00:17:30,916 --> 00:17:34,219
And you don't
disrespect no lady.
388
00:17:34,286 --> 00:17:36,955
I can't believe
how ugly this got.
389
00:17:37,056 --> 00:17:38,590
What happen next?
390
00:17:38,690 --> 00:17:40,292
Well, we roll back
to her crib, right
391
00:17:40,392 --> 00:17:42,628
to watch a little
"Def Comedy Jam," right?
392
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:43,929
You know I didn't wanna go
393
00:17:44,029 --> 00:17:46,198
but I felt sorry for her
and I went anyway.
394
00:17:46,265 --> 00:17:48,367
Hold up. What do you mean
you felt sorry for me?
395
00:17:48,434 --> 00:17:52,905
I felt sorry for you.
Because your jaw was on swell.
396
00:17:52,971 --> 00:17:56,308
Hey, take it from me, Valentino,
if I were you I would stay low
397
00:17:56,408 --> 00:17:58,977
before you catch a halo.
398
00:17:59,078 --> 00:18:01,213
Just tell me
how this date ended.
399
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:04,416
Well, I saw that it was about
00 in the morning, right?
400
00:18:04,483 --> 00:18:06,652
So I told her I was
getting ready to leave.
401
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:09,721
That's when she started
begging the brother to stay.
402
00:18:09,788 --> 00:18:11,423
I ain't lying!
403
00:18:11,490 --> 00:18:13,425
That's because
you were so boring.
404
00:18:13,492 --> 00:18:15,227
I was scared you would bore
yourself to sleep..
405
00:18:15,294 --> 00:18:17,162
- While you were driving.
- 'Oh, please.'
406
00:18:17,262 --> 00:18:19,398
And I didn't want that
on my conscience.
407
00:18:21,133 --> 00:18:24,670
Boy, obviously there were
no sparks flying here, so..
408
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:27,439
Let's just find out
who our audience picked.
409
00:18:32,978 --> 00:18:36,081
'Yes! Yes!'
410
00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,821
Well, looks like they've
picked Valentino.
411
00:18:42,921 --> 00:18:46,358
So if you two wanna go out
again, which I seriously doubt
412
00:18:46,458 --> 00:18:47,759
we will pay for it.
413
00:18:47,826 --> 00:18:51,196
Shoo. Y'all should pay me
for wasting my time.
414
00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:52,598
I don't know why you're tripping
415
00:18:52,664 --> 00:18:55,367
you know you wanna go
back out with me.
416
00:18:55,467 --> 00:18:56,969
Yeah, Sheneneh, stop tripping.
417
00:18:57,035 --> 00:19:01,106
Plus we gonna give you
$300 and a limo.
418
00:19:01,173 --> 00:19:03,442
- $300 and a limo?
- Yeah.
419
00:19:03,509 --> 00:19:05,144
Wait a minute,
I don't know about this.
420
00:19:05,210 --> 00:19:07,479
I gotta think about this.
421
00:19:09,481 --> 00:19:12,384
Okay, Andre, I'll go!
I'll go!
422
00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:14,219
Oh, I'm telling
this is very unusual.
423
00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:16,321
Looks like we've made a
"Love Jones Connection."
424
00:19:16,388 --> 00:19:17,823
And no one got hurt.
425
00:19:17,890 --> 00:19:21,360
So, Valentino, come on out
and say hello to Sheneneh.
426
00:19:23,562 --> 00:19:26,064
- How you doin', man?
- Pretty good.
427
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:27,466
Now, wait.
428
00:19:27,533 --> 00:19:30,469
That's how you got your
chin check last time.
429
00:19:33,372 --> 00:19:34,873
Oh, well, that's all
for our show.
430
00:19:34,973 --> 00:19:36,241
I'm D'Andre Simpson
431
00:19:36,341 --> 00:19:38,177
I'll see you when you
pay your cable bill.
432
00:19:38,243 --> 00:19:40,512
God bless you.
Peace.
433
00:19:53,225 --> 00:19:56,028
- Yes! There--
- Come on, Sheneneh.
434
00:19:56,094 --> 00:19:58,363
Let's split up this prize money,
so I can get outta here.
435
00:19:58,430 --> 00:20:01,266
Alright, alright,
be patient, uh-huh.
436
00:20:01,366 --> 00:20:04,536
- Here.
- That's only $5, Sheneneh.
437
00:20:04,603 --> 00:20:07,072
We're supposed to split up
a half of $300.
438
00:20:07,172 --> 00:20:09,608
I can count, okay?
439
00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:12,611
That's what you get for clowning
my friends on national TV.
440
00:20:12,711 --> 00:20:14,446
You don't know them like that.
441
00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:15,747
$5, Sheneneh?
442
00:20:15,847 --> 00:20:18,183
I can't buy nothing
for $5, Sheneneh.
443
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:20,252
No? But you can get
a one way ticket
444
00:20:20,352 --> 00:20:22,621
to get the hell
outta my face, Vale.
445
00:20:23,555 --> 00:20:26,959
No, poof, pow, be gone.
446
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:28,927
Sheneneh, can I get my money?
447
00:20:29,027 --> 00:20:30,896
I mean, $5 I can't
even buy dinner.
448
00:20:30,963 --> 00:20:33,131
What am I supposed
to do with $5?
449
00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:36,768
I don't know.
Super-size it.
450
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:40,639
Sheneneh!
451
00:20:40,739 --> 00:20:41,907
Sheneneh!
452
00:20:44,309 --> 00:20:46,378
Oh, girl, is it really that bad?
453
00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:52,784
'Oh, start.
Once again same place.'
454
00:20:52,884 --> 00:20:56,054
'And five, four three two..'
455
00:20:56,755 --> 00:20:58,490
Oh, g..
456
00:20:58,590 --> 00:21:01,393
Oh, girl, is it really that bad?
457
00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:06,098
I'm good, alright, okay.
458
00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:22,447
- It's my line now?
- 'Yeah.'
459
00:21:22,514 --> 00:21:24,016
Okay.
460
00:21:32,591 --> 00:21:35,827
Shut up.
I'm allowed one.
461
00:21:43,835 --> 00:21:45,370
It wasn't you, Pam.
462
00:21:45,470 --> 00:21:48,440
'Cause I'd have to reorder
a new horse trough to feed you.
463
00:21:59,685 --> 00:22:02,554
I wish y'all are recording this.
464
00:22:02,654 --> 00:22:04,323
- Oh.
- 'He did.'
34363
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