Original subtitles

Let me alone. l�m innocent, l tell you!

She came down and did it.

Come on, out with it. And no more of that goofy talk.

A 2-year-old wouldn�t believe that fantastic story.

How did you know there was a murder before it happened?

-Mr. Jordan? Are you there? -Who you talking to?

-What are you mumbling about? -We had trouble with you before.

When you were a fight manager handling that guy Pendleton.

Good old Joe. The cleanest fighter that ever lived.

Yeah, but when he died...

...you told us he came down to Earth and got inside people�s bodies.

-He did. He did! -And invisible Mr. Jordan, who helped.

lt�s true, l tell you. lt�s true! True, he did. Mr. Jordan did do it!

Mr. Jordan, where are you?

Look, Mr. Jordan.

Look, are you--?

Mr. Jordan, are you there?

How long do we have to wait around out here?

Take it easy. You�ll get your story as soon as we break this guy.

Now, get this, Corkle.

We don�t let anybody make monkeys out of the police force.

So unless you want us to really go to work on you--

l�ll tell you everything.

-But it won�t make sense. -Come on!

Well, this fellow, Danny Miller, had a show called Swinging the Muses.

lt was all about goddesses. He made them hot goddesses.

And that�s where all the trouble began.

They were rehearsing at the Elton Theater...

...she heard it and came down. Mr. Jordan did it!

-What are you talking about? -That�s what l�m trying to tell you.

lt was at a dress rehearsal. At the Elton Theater.

The Elton Theater!

All right, positions, everybody!

Make it good. You�re not here because you carried my books to school.

l�ll give you my all. Or what�s left of it.

Careful of those costumes. All set, Phil.

Don�t drown the lyrics. l want to hear every word.

All right, Mr. Miller. Let�s go, fellas, and brighten it up.

Calliope, Clio!

Urania, Melpomene, Euterpe, all of you!

-Terpischore, what�s happened? -What�s the matter? Tell us.

Wait until you hear what�s happening on Earth.

A mortal, Daniel Miller, is presenting a musical about us, the Nine Muses!

-What�s disgraceful about that? -We�ve been glorified for centuries.

-Shakespeare, Walt Whitman, Burns! -But this barbarian isn�t them.

Why, he�s portraying us in a low and vulgar manner on a public stage!

And according to him, l�m nothing but a man-chasing trollop!

-Oh, no. -Oh, yes.

And as for the rest of you...

...he says you�ve kissed over three million men!

-lmagine that! -That�s scandalous.

We haven�t kissed a man in over 2000 years.

Except Apollo. Once.

And you should hear the type of song he�s using.

Take a chick like me They call me Terpsichore

I�m the goddess of song and dance I put the ants in the dancers� pants

Oh, no!

Oh, yes.

That could only come from America.

Where else? Their number one song on the hit parade is:

��Who Hit Nelly in the Belly With a Flounder?��

Who does he think inspired Michelangelo, da Vinci, Rembrandt?

Do you know who he�s telling the world we inspired?

The man who invented the skinless weenie. A frankfurter.

A frankfurter! How ghastly.

You can all twiddle your thumbs, but l�m going to do something about it.

The theater is my province. lt belongs to me.

l�ll show this Miller imbecile a thing or two.

-l�ll make him regret he was born! -What can you possibly do?

He�s down there and you�re here.

There must be some way, there must be.

l know! l know who can do it. He�s just the one to help me.

-Who? -He did it before, he can do it again.

Terpsichore, what�s happening to you?

Of course, that�s it. That�s what l�m going to do. He�s the one!

-Where are you going? -Come back here!

We�ll tell Zeus!

Who do you think you are, popping up out of nowhere?

Barging in on one of our busiest days!

l�m Terpsichore. l�ve come a long way and l have to see him!

And l told you he has no time for isolated cases.

But l�m not an isolated case. Don�t you understand?

l�m Terpsichore, goddess of song and dance!

That�s preposterous. She�s nothing but a legend.

She never existed except in Greek mythology.

lf you don�t take me, you won�t exist.

My dear child, don�t threaten. What could you possibly do to me?

We don�t feel pain up here.

Here, here, you. Come back here!

Escort 3082 reporting, sir.

Twelve passengers in a blizzard.

-Territory? -Southern California.

-Proceed. -Granite, lrwin.

Somerset, Nathaniel.

He is the multimillionaire, sir.

-He was the multimillionaire. -l forgot. They can�t take it with them.

Get your hands off me. Let me go.

Mr. Jordan, could l speak to you?

l�m awfully sorry. l did everything in my power to stop her.

Why should you try to stop her?

She�s not like the others. She didn�t come up through the regular channels.

-lndeed. -l see how terribly busy you are...

...and l do hope l�m not intruding.

That�s quite all right.

-Proceed. -Butler, Thomas.

Donahoe, Eleanor.

-Suppose you tell me what you want? -She says she�s Terpsichore.

Of course, you and l know that�s utterly absurd.

You and l don�t know any such thing.

Muses have been the personification of the arts since ancient Greece.

We do only our best.

But nobody who is anybody has paid attention to them for over 2000 years.

Years? Messenger 701 3, we don�t have calendars up here.

-l�ve tried to explain that to you. -lt�s habit. l keep forgetting. l�m sorry.

How is everything over on Mount Parnassus?

Oh, just wonderful, Mr. Jordan. l hated to leave.

Because l thought it my duty, l was able to tear myself away.

See, l want to go down to Earth and get into a theatrical production.

You don�t know our business here.

-We bring people up, not down. -You shut up, you.

l mean.... Well, you see, Mr. Jordan, l know you like to help people...

...and this young man, the producer, is all mixed up.

He doesn�t understand a goddess.

lf you help, l could play the goddess, and his show would succeed, you see.

lsn�t that a good idea?

l must say, it�s extremely kind of you, my dear.

But we can�t meddle in the financial affairs of every man on Earth.

We just don�t have the staff for it.

-There. Mr. Jordan has spoken. -Oh, but l--

But Mr. Jordan, it seems such a pity.

Oh, l�m certain this Mr. Miller is a most deserving person...

...and l only want to help.

Miller. What is his given name?

Daniel.

Miller, Daniel.

lf you�ll just wait here a moment.

Mr. Sloan.

Contact the registrar�s office and ask them for everything on Miller, Daniel.

Next time, l hope you�ll take my advice for what it�s worth.

Oh, you make me tired.

l thought you couldn�t feel any pain.

l�ve got a memory, haven�t l?

Mr. Jordan.

On Miller, Daniel, the records list him as an alternate.

-An alternate? -He�s due here on one of two dates.

The first soon, the other a number of years hence.

The choice depending upon undetermined circumstances.

Yes, yes, of course.

l remember the whole case now.

l believe that our circumstances have been determined for us.

Now, my dear.

You say your only interest in this...

...is to make Daniel Miller�s musical a success?

Oh, yes, Mr. Jordan.

l have only his welfare at heart.

-Surely you�re not going to-- -You�ll stay till your task is completed?

-But of course. -And then return to Mount Parnassus?

Oh, yes, Mr. Jordan.

Good. l will regard that as an irrevocable promise.

You will consider this your special assignment. Please start immediately.

Me? But Mr. Jordan, l�ve been promising myself a vacation for years.

l mean, our kind of years.

You will forego your vacation for the present.

Take this young lady down at once...

...and assist her in every possible way. ls that perfectly clear?

Yes, sir.

-Thank you, you�re a darling. -Do you mind if l collect another day?

-What are we waiting for? Let�s go. -Just a moment.

l�m the one who says ��Let�s go.��

Let�s go.

We get around. One minute we�re up there, then we�re here in New York.

-How do you do it? -l�ll have to ask you not to pry.

While l�m here, where am l going to live?

Take the Peach Bloom suite at the Waldorf Plaza.

l�m sure we can figure some way to take care of the expense.

Sounds like fun.

Why are they all hurrying so, these Americans?

-Where are they going? -To see Mr. Jordan.

Yes. The more they hurry, the sooner they�ll get there.

Precisely.

701 3! Where are you?

Oh, there you are.

l wish you�d wait and not go dashing about.

l�m not a racehorse, you know.

-Do you think you ought to be here? -And why not?

l mean those clothes. They might wonder who l am if l�m seen with you.

l have tried to make it clear to you...

...that you are the only one who can see and hear Mr. Jordan and me.

Oh, l forgot.

Looking for somebody, miss?

Oh, yes, a silly-looking gentleman, he was wearing a messenger�s uniform.

-He was here a minute ago. -And he�s here now.

But some people can�t get it in their heads that l can�t be seen or heard.

l don�t see nobody, ma�am.

-Thank you. -There.

l guess that�ll show you, you suspicious little...little....

l didn�t say it, Mr. Jordan.

A real theater!

l haven�t been on a stage since 429 B.C.

You�re not on one yet.

-Terpsichore! -Yes?

No, no. That�s not for you. That�s....

What is it, Calliope? Come on, kid, give out!

An airplane. lt crashed on the other side of Parnassus.

Any occupants?

-Men? -l�ll say. Two beautiful aviators.

l don�t care if they�re cross-eyed, knock-kneed...

...bowlegged. All l want to know is, are they alive and healthy?

-ls she supposed to be me? -lndubitably.

Throw them over your shoulders and bring them in.

lt�s simply disgraceful.

Ambrosia. What l need is a good slug of Scotch.

Now, that�s not the way l see Terpsichore....

Why, it�s a thousand times worse than l ever imagined.

-lt�s still too tame for my money. -Too tame, did he say?

--trollop. She�s man-crazy!

That gentleman must be Mr. Daniel Miller.

ln the flesh...

...temporarily.

Well, 701 3, this all has to be corrected instantly.

You may be satisfied with the way things are, but l�m not.

Oh, Mr. Jordan.

-Now perhaps we�ll get someplace. -What seems to be the trouble?

We�ve got to get that jezebel out of there and me in.

What do you suggest?

Why not have her break a leg? You could do that, couldn�t you?

Don�t you think that�s a bit drastic?

Mr. Jordan, how am l going to get into the show?

You are the goddess of song and dance, aren�t you?

-Of course l am. -Well, what�s stopping you?

What can l do?

Go ahead, you�ll think of something.

All right, Georgia, let�s go through your dance now.

Take your places, girls, and break it up this time.

lf l may be so bold, sir...

...l tell you, you�re going to rue the day you got mixed up with that...

...that Greek.

-Here comes the angel. -Angel?

Mr. Jordan, really.

��Angel�� is a theatrical term for one who finances a show.

-Then he�s-- He�s-- -Joe Manion, the gambler, yes.

Oh, dear, dear.

He�s the one who will kill Miller if the show fails?

Definitely.

-For the love of Pete, who�s that? -Hold it.

There are times, 701 3, when our work is quite pleasant.

l anticipate nothing but catastrophe.

What�s going on here?

She�s magic.

-lt�s fantastic! That�s Terpsichore. -What?

l need a goddess and a goddess comes down out of nowhere.

l wonder who she is.

Well, Mr. Daniel Miller, you�ve got two of us now.

-Take your choice. -Two of us? Choice?

-You�re about to lose some teeth. -Hey, take it easy.

You cheap little hip-swinger. l�d like to--

How dare you!

l ought to have you wiped off the face of earth.

-What? -Girls, wait a minute.

You throw this character out this minute or l�m walking.

Go ahead and walk.

The general tone of the theater will go up about 200 percent.

Are you going to throw her out or not?

-You don�t see me doing it, do you? -Then l quit.

Danny, don�t go overboard. You looked for months for the right girl.

And this is just what l was looking for.

-l�ve heard enough. He�s gone crazy. -No, no, stick around.

-But she�s got to know how to sing! -Let me handle this, Eddie.

Honey, please say yes. Can you sing?

Of course l can sing. And l can act too.

What is this, a contest? l�m leaving.

l�ve been looking for an out.

Since l got into this thing, l knew it was a turkey.

-Go change and l�ll give you a check. -That suits me fine.

Honey, l don�t know who you are or where you came from but....

Mr. Manion, is this what the show needed or isn�t it?

You�re rolling the dice.

What key do you sing in?

Any key.

-Phil, play ""Let�s Stay Young Forever."" -Coming up.

That�s good enough for me.

Where did you come from?

l just floated down out of the clouds.

How did you know this song?

l heard it from up there.

Oh, you�ve been hanging around the balcony.

How did you ever learn to sing and dance?

l sang and danced like that when l was 6 years old.

-What�s your name, honey? -Terpsichore.

l mean, that�s the part in the show.

Well, yes, l know, but what�s your name?

Kitty.

Kitty. That�s a pretty name.

l thought you were so excited you couldn�t remember your own name.

Now, if you can calm down a little, l�ve got a few details to settle with you.

-Take over, Eddie. -All right, girls, line up.

By the way, who�s your agent?

-My what? -Agent.

You�ve got an agent, haven�t you?

Who handles you?

-Of course l have an agent. -Who is he?

Max Corkle. He�s coming in this very moment.

He�ll be here in a moment.

Danny, am l lucky to get you when you ain�t busy.

Meet Rosebud the Human Pretzel.

Stands on a six-foot ladder, does a back bend...

...and laces her shoes with her teeth.

Max, darling!

lsn�t it funny, we were just talking about him. He�s my agent.

l�m your agent?

-That�s what l said, l�m her agent. -You�ll never guess what�s happened.

l danced in the chorus just like you told me to and it worked.

Sure, sure.

ln the chorus, just like l said.

Max, you rascal...

...you�ve been wonderful the way you�ve handled me all these years.

All these years.

Let�s see now. How long has that been?

Max, you had a girl like this up your sleeve and never showed her to me?

Well, l�ll tell you, Danny, it�s like this. l got such a big clientele.

Mr. Miller, l�m waiting for my check.

Excuse me a moment.

How many years am l supposed to stand around here?

Look, sweetheart, l didn�t know that Miss....

You know, my old client....

You go back to my office and practice your bends.

Same old Max. One of my favorite people.

Mine too. When does he join us?

Mr. Corkle is an agent.

That�s right. We never get them.

l�ll be around if you need me.

Thanks for everything-- Mr. Corkle.

Why are you thanking me? l ought to be thanking you.

Say, why�d you pick me for your agent?

A friend recommended you, Max.

-l�m glad he did. -So am l.

l�ll have the contracts in the morning.

What�s your last name, Kitty?

lt....

lsn�t it funny?

lt�s on the tip of my tongue.

Mine too.

What is this? What are you two trying to hide?

Something in her past?

No, we had an agreement. She don�t want anybody to know who she is.

Yes. That�s it.

Why?

lt�s on account of all those cows.

-Cows? -Yes, my uncle in Texas.

He has millions of cows and you know how cows multiply.

And he doesn�t want the family name associated with the theater.

-That�s it, exactly. -lf that�s all, we�ll just give her a name.

l know, we�ll call her Pendleton. Kitty Pendleton.

Named after the greatest fighter that ever laid on a glove, Joe Pendleton.

Came out of no place, just like you, and wound up a champ.

And you�re gonna wind up a champ. Right?

-Right. -lt�s all set. She gets a regular salary.

The deal is on. We sign the contracts in the morning. Thanks, Danny.

Well, so long, Miss....

Of course. So long, Miss Pendleton. l�ll be seeing you around.

-Oh, Eddie. Eddie. -Yeah?

About that client, give her a break. She�s never been in a chorus before.

Are you kidding? She�s not in the chorus. She�s playing the lead.

The lead?

Yeah, sure. She�s Terpsichore.

Terpsichore. The lead. The lead?

l got 1 0 percent. l never had a lead. l never had nothing but acrobats...

...pretzel benders, trained seals. Now l got a star!

Me, Max Corkle. l got a star.

And they�re throwing me out of my office.

They�re wiping my name off. Now it spells ""Cork.""

l gotta go back. l gotta go back.

They�re throwing the furniture out and l gotta go.

l�m still here!

l suppose you think it�s sort of bold of me, pushing my way in.

l can�t say you�re a shrinking violet.

Anyway, l�m glad you did.

l promise l�ll do my best to make your show everything it should be.

Oh, l�m sure you will. Here, sit down.

Well, l....

l....

-Why do you keep staring at me? -Staring?

l wasn�t aware of it.

You�ve been looking at me in a strange way ever since l came in.

Well, to tell you the truth, l do feel something strange about you.

Why, it�s almost as if you came from another world.

Well....

You were going to tell me about the show.

l�d better give you an idea of the story and...

-...let you hear the songs and.... -l think that might be a good idea.

Well, it....

lt�s about a....

Don�t you remember?

Yes, yes, l remember.

You see....

Eddie and l play a couple of American aviators and--

Yes?

We crash on Mount Parnassus and there we meet Terpsichore.

-You know who she is, don�t you? -Oh, l think so.

She�s the most talented of all the goddesses, isn�t she?

l don�t know, l never met a goddess.

The one in our show is just an ordinary dame.

Anyway, this is the love song l sing to you in the first act.

You see...

...l fall in love with you...

...in the show.

The love song. Do you mind?

--and l tell you, you and everybody else have it all wrong.

lmagining l�m this, and imagining l�m that.

No more nonsense. Now, l wanna know who you really are.

All right. lf you�ll just let me alone, l�ll tell you.

Now we�re getting someplace.

l�m Terpsichore, Grecian goddess of song and dance.

l didn�t land on my head as a kid. Come on, honey, who are you?

l know it sounds ridiculous, but that�s who l am.

You�re doing fine, but give me more on that last line. Hit ��ridiculous.��

-Yes, Mr. Miller. -Okay, l�ll give you the cue.

l didn�t land on my head as a kid. Come on, honey, who are you?

l know it sounds ridiculous, but that�s who l am.

l�m Terpsichore, the daughter of....

-Of.... -Go on, Kitty.

Look, Mr. Miller, it says here ��Zeus,�� but it�s all wrong.

Terpsichore is not the daughter of Zeus. My father--

-l mean, her father was Dionysus. -No, no. Zeus.

That�s the popular belief, but l happen to know the facts. lt�s Dionysus.

Please, l didn�t put this show together with thumbtacks.

lt so happens l looked up this particular item in the encyclopedia.

l hate to disillusion you...

...but the encyclopedia is wrong.

No kidding. You know more than the Encyclopaedia Britannica?

About things like this, yes.

Since we�re on the subject, you got a lot of things wrong.

For instance?

For instance, you�ve got me drinking ambrosia.

Ambrosia�s food. Nectar is the drink.

And your scenery.

Why, it doesn�t bear the faintest resemblance to Mt. Parnassus.

-And as for your costumes-- -Kitty, l haven�t time to fiddle around.

Out of the chorus, l give you the lead. Now you�re trying to run the show.

l knew about these things before your great-great-great-grandpa was born.

Boy, you�re really a character.

l work late with you night after night. All you do is give me trouble.

-Danny won�t go for much of that. -No, of course not.

l think she must�ve went to college. That�ll ruin anybody.

Come on.

Mr. Jordan.

What�s the reason for this unseemly haste?

l�m sorry, sir. But it�s about that Kitty ��Terpsichore�� Pendleton.

She lied to you, brazenly, without shame.

Yes, indeed. She�s not helping Danny Miller--

That is Miller, Daniel-- Not in the least.

She�s trying to change his entire show, fighting like a wildcat the entire way.

-l know. -You do?

Then surely, sir, you�ll send her right back where she came from.

-Then you can take your vacation. -Well, sir...

...to be perfectly frank, l did make reservations at Paradise Lake.

You know how difficult they are to get these days.

That, 701 3, was an unwarranted assumption of authority on your part.

As soon as you have completed your assignment with this young Muse...

...you will report to my office for disciplinary measures.

Mr. Jordan. You�re not going to assign me to Brooklyn again?

Precisely.

Oh, dear.

The nights are six months long in Brooklyn.

What do morals mean to me? l�m a goddess. l�m--

Oh, Danny, l just can�t say these lines. Morals do mean something to me--

That�s all very charming, but l�m not interested. Just stick to the script.

l can�t stand any more of this.

The whole idea of this scene is cheap and vulgar, and so is your show.

Why, suggesting that a goddess, or anybody else, would marry two men.

ln the name of great Jupiter!

lf you�re to present the Nine Muses, you can do it...

...without stupid lines, embarrassing costumes and idiotic sets.

Take over, Eddie. Come along with me.

Max, it doesn�t look good.

And l thought l�d given up handling fighters.

l could put her in the ring with a tiger...

...if l could find one that would take her on.

l want to tell you something, Kitty.

l�ve gone overboard for you. Not only in the show, but personally.

l don�t like to talk about those things, but you must know that�s how it is.

You certainly have a peculiar way of showing it.

l�m pushing all my personal feelings aside.

l�ve got to. This show means too much to me.

What l must come up with is a good, hot musical that�ll pack them in.

You seem to have different ideas about it.

And what l�m trying to say is...

...the way you�re doing it, you�ll have a failure, sure.

Let me worry about that.

Why, you lead people to believe the show�s about Terpsichore, but it�s not.

They�ll laugh at you. She�s not at all like you characterized her.

l made this whole show out of thin air.

lt�s a fairy tale, and Terpsichore is any cockeyed thing l say.

l�d be careful, Mr. Daniel Miller.

She might hear you say that, and she might not like it.

Oh, she might not like it, huh?

l suppose she might come out of the clouds and slap me across the face.

She might, if you continue to paint her as a cheap, man-chasing trollop!

Now get this, once and for all.

lf l say Terpsichore�s a trollop, she�s a trollop.

Be on the stage in five minutes, or you�re out of the show.

Temper, temper, temper.

You! What do you want?

-A very interesting little scene. -Oh, go fry an egg.

My, you have come down to earth. And right into the gutter.

l asked what you wanted. Don�t you have other things to do?

Nothing that�ll give me quite the satisfaction of taking you back.

l presume from this display of ladylike restraint...

-...that you�re amenable to the idea. -Well, you�re presuming all wrong.

l�m not going back at all.

l�m going to get what l came for...

...if l have to smash the theater and him with it.

The only thing you�ve smashed so far is yourself.

Yes.

-Yes, l�ve been obvious. Crude. -As a fishwife.

What are you up to now?

So the gentleman has gone overboard for me, has he?

Perhaps l�ll swim around with him a little bit.

None of that, now. You dare to lie to him and lead him on, and l�ll--

-l�ll tell him just what you-- -You�ll do no such thing.

You can�t be seen or heard. Remember?

Oh, dear, dear. That poor young man.

l guess that takes care of you.

Danny�s talking about throwing you-- Who you talking to?

Just the wind. lt�s a silly little habit of mine.

Sure, lots of us got funny habits like that.

But don�t let anybody catch you. lt�s standing still, not blowing.

-l�ll remember that. -About you and Danny--

-Don�t worry. -l know, but l do.

That poor young man.

l�m sorry, Danny.

And Eddie.

l�ve thought it all over, and now l know which one of us really runs the show.

All right. We�ll skip the dialogue. Go right into the number.

Pick it up, will you, Phil?

Females.

One head, but two faces.

What do you think?

Must be the new thing they�re talking about.

lt might work out if you don�t hang around too much.

-l was thinking the same. -Looking after my interests.

Once a pal, always a pal.

-l gotta get the knife from my back. -l put it there before it rusted.

You kidder.

Fellas, second chorus.

-What you think? -You with the oven, me with the lovin�.

-How about you with the oven? -No, you�re the man for the oven.

Now, don�t move. You�re perfect as you are.

-You moved. -Let�s get back to that oven routine.

Oh, you�re in. l hear you make a beautiful upside-down cake.

Love to, but the blood rushes to my head.

Never mind, then, just some juice and coffee.

-Bring it up. -What�ll you do?

Just dusting and brushing things off.

Fellas. Break it up. You�re on.

l hate to disturb you, Danny, but it�s confidential.

Excuse me, Kitty.

lt�s about Kitty.

What about her?

She�s still working on you to change the show.

You keep saying that, but it doesn�t make sense.

Why would she want to do that?

Because she�s the kind of girl who only plays if she has all the marbles.

Look, Eddie. We�ve had one fight in our lives, when we were kids.

l don�t want to have another one with you.

Because you licked me that time.

Let�s just stay friends, huh?

l think l�ll do a little work.

-Feeling better, Eddie? -Oh, yes, yes. l feel fine.

Well, we�ll see if we can�t do something to change all that.

Do you mind?

What brought you out here?

-lt worked, didn�t it? -What worked?

Oh, l know what Eddie told you.

-Oh, you do, huh? -Yes.

And l�ll tell you something that may surprise you. l think he�s right.

Say, are we talking about the same thing?

Of course.

l�ve been willful, selfish and stubborn...

...and maybe a little ungrateful.

You gonna break down like that, l guess maybe l ought to.

l don�t mind telling you l�ve been kind of bullheaded and stubborn myself.

But you have a right to be. After all, what do l know about the theater?

And as you said, l�m just a little nobody you took out of the chorus.

Oh, l don�t know. You�ve had a couple of pretty good ideas.

You�re just being nice.

l�ve been giving a lot of thought to what you�ve been saying all along.

Maybe the public won�t like my taste.

Maybe l�m just a Broadway mug after all.

No. You�re an artist.

Well, you could be if you reached out.

Anyway, l just had a silly idea they wouldn�t like it your way.

-Maybe you�re right. -No.

Let�s not keep talking about the show.

Don�t you ever think of anything else?

Look at that moon. lt�s like a million-dollar gold piece.

Maybe l�m trying to make the show too low-down.

What wonderful air. lt�s like wine.

You know, audiences� tastes might have changed.

Oh, Danny.

Excuse me, sir.

Eddie?

Yeah.

l don�t know what it is, but he just doesn�t like me.

No, l guess not.

Well, l guess l�ll go in, and let you figure it out.

Aren�t you going to say good night?

Good night.

Good night.

Come here, you.

Well, what do you think, Danny?

Oh, l don�t know. We didn�t even get enough applause to take bows.

A few walked out during the first act.

You can�t tell. They might be people with appointments.

-Like doctors or something. -Thanks, Eddie.

-My dear, magnificent, magnificent! -Sheer poetry, poetry of movement.

Oh, every scene a painting.

My dear. l am Mrs. Fenimore Hume, president of the Pure Art Forum.

l wonder if you would come to a little gathering at my house?

-A sort of a late supper. -l�d be delighted.

-Danny, do you mind if l go? -No, go ahead. Sounds like fun.

l�ll only be a minute.

Brother, if those longhairs go for it, you�re dead.

-Hello, Mr. Manion. Have a good seat? -Yeah. l saw and heard everything.

This was just a tryout, Mr. Manion. Don�t judge by this.

Remember, our understanding was New York.

-That�s right. Nobody�s rushing you. -Thanks very much.

They�re tearing it to shreds in the lobby. What�ll we do? Post a notice?

No, no. l just want a little time to think.

Have everybody on-stage tomorrow morning at 1 0:00.

l�m going for a walk.

Can l drive you anyplace, Danny?

No, thanks. Not tonight.

And that guy never looked at a dame before in his life.

-Good morning. -Morning.

-Good morning, everyone. -Morning.

-Morning. -Morning, Miss Pendleton.

Good morning, everybody.

What�s wrong with you all? Why is everybody so glum?

-Haven�t you read the notices? -No.

Why, she hasn�t read the notices.

��Swinging the Muses, although lovely in spots, resembles a Bach festival.

lt should�ve been at Symphony Hall, where the audience is forewarned...

...so that they can sleep through the performance.��

And listen to this:

��As for myself, l can take about 20 minutes of Greek classic.

But two hours would get anybody down.��

How dare they?

What do they know of the arts?

l see it as a great triumph.

We�ve given something beautiful to the theater.

Yeah, our blood.

But there�s a line at the box office down the street.

They�re the ones who bought advance tickets, asking for their money back.

We had a great show until you butted in and made it so highbrow.

Highbrow?

l was warned about your country.

How can you mix art with jive and baseball and hot dogs?

Get her. The show busts, so she don�t live here anymore.

Hold it. Hold it, everybody. This�ll get us no place.

Look, kids. When l got all of you into this thing...

...l was sure we�d have a smash.

l knew what l wanted then, and l know what l want now.

We�re going back to what it was, before l got sidetracked.

We�re gonna throw all the phony art overboard.

Stay out of town rehearsing till it�s in shape.

lt�ll be everything it started out as:

A show for people who like jive and baseball and hot dogs.

Now, one more thing.

From now on, there�ll be nobody around here acting like a goddess.

l�m the boss, what l say goes.

lf anybody doesn�t like it that way, now�s the time to say so.

Well?

Mr. Miller, the show is all yours.

All right, that�s that.

Before l look anyplace else, l�ll try every one of you kids for the lead.

Hello, Kitty.

Oh, Mr. Jordan. You�re just the one l want to see.

-So l imagined. -l want to go back, right away.

Surely you don�t want to leave when he needs you most.

l do. l want to leave at once.

You told me you wanted to help him, my sole reason for letting you come.

l lied to you, Mr. Jordan. l wasn�t interested in him, not for a second.

l came for purely selfish reasons, to change the show. That�s all l wanted.

-l know. -And still you let me go ahead?

-l had a feeling it�d work out all right. -But it hasn�t.

lt�s worked out all wrong.

l don�t intend to tolerate his arrogance anymore.

l don�t think you�ll go back. Not right now.

Mr. Jordan, you underestimate my emotions.

l told you l hate the man.

-l loathe him. -l�m not sure of that, either.

-You�re not in possession of the facts. -What facts?

Well, l�d like to take you back in time a few months.

Something important happened then that you should know.

-What happened? -You�ll see.

He�s on every number but the right one. Thirteen wins.

-Why don�t you tell him? -This is a while ago. l wasn�t here.

-l�ll tell him, then. -He can�t see or hear you.

Besides, you haven�t met him yet.

-Thirteen. -Just as you predicted.

l�m not the only one who knew. The wheel is crooked.

What is it? What�s the matter?

They thought Danny was with regular patrons. They extended him credit.

He�s lost $20,000 and can�t pay.

Well, l don�t understand what any of this has to do with me.

Come along. You�ll see.

-Like to hear what they�re saying? -Yes, l would.

Why did you keep playing with no money?

-l thought l might win. -Well, you didn�t.

-l�d like to talk to you alone. -Spike, get going.

We�re supposed to be partners. l have half-interest in this palace.

l said, get going.

Okay, let�s have it.

Well, it�s pretty simple.

l�m Daniel Miller. l had to get hold of $ 1 00,000 right away.

-What for? -To put on a show.

l�ve had a couple failures and the boys with the money ran out on me.

But l still have plenty of confidence in the show and in myself.

-lf you can-- -That�s very touching.

But unless l have my 20,000 by tomorrow morning....

You�ll have one of your gorillas bump me off.

-You�ve been seeing too many movies. -Oh, l think l know how you operate.

l figured all that out before l came up here.

Oh, you did?

And l also figured out, if l didn�t win...

...you�d put up the 1 00,000 for a piece of the show.

Now, where did you ever get an idea like that?

Because you�re a gambler. You lose 1 00,000 on the turn of a card.

Turning cards is my business.

Goodbye, Mr. Miller.

Go out that door.

Of course, Mr. Manion, if anything should happen to me now...

...with all those witnesses, you�d be a cinch for the electric chair.

Go on.

On the other hand, you back the show and l�ll guarantee it with a note.

You haven�t any money. What good is your note?

Oh, this one�s very good. lt�s a suicide note.

-A suicide note. -That�s right.

lf the show fails, you can have one of your boys take care of me...

...plant the note on my body, you�re in the clear with the police.

Doesn�t that appeal to your gambler�s instinct?

So you want to stake your life against my money? ls that it?

That�s the idea.

At least you know l�ll work hard to put the show over.

All right.

l�ll play with those chips.

Sit down.

And...

...start writing.

��No one is responsible...

...for my death but myself.

l�ve taken my own life...

...because....��

That�s the reason l�ve concerned myself with this young man.

l�ve always felt that he had a great deal to offer to life and the theater.

-lt�d be a pity to take him too soon. -Yes.

The choice is up to you. With you in the New York opening, it can�t fail.

But what�ll l do? Will he take me back now?

l�m quite sure it�s worth trying.

Good luck, my dear. And do it his way this time.

l am the daughter of Zeus.

l�m sorry, honey. lt�s just too much for you.

-Anyone else, Eddie? -Yes.

-One more. -What do you want?

l want to come back.

You�re too late.

Oh, Danny, wait, please. Danny.

-You walked out. You can stay out. -You haven�t found anyone else.

-You need me. -Like a hole in the head.

-You�ve got to listen to me. -What are you following me for?

What are you after now? Are you still in love with me?

l didn�t realize what any of this meant to you. But now l do.

And all l wanna do is help.

l�ll do anything, anything you say.

lt�s unimportant what you think of me.

Do it for yourself, for the show.

Please, Danny.

-You say you�ll do anything l say? -Yes, Danny.

-You�ll sing my way? -Yes, Danny.

-Dance my way? -Yes, Danny.

-Wear anything l want you to wear? -Yes, Danny.

All right.

You open in New York Thursday night.

lt received bad notices in Philadelphia.

Jack, l understand they changed it. l heard good reports.

lt was rumored some sort of trouble with the leading lady.

l adore musicals. l�m so tired of thinking.

Darling, you�ve lost weight, haven�t you? Or is that a new dress?

-Good luck, Mr. Miller. -Best of luck.

-Hope you have a smash. -Thanks, girls.

Thanks for staying with it. l love all of you.

Honey, see you a minute? lt�s Danny.

Hello, Danny.

l hope it�s wonderful.

Well, if you come through, we�ll have them tossing their wives in the air.

-l�ll do my very best, Danny. -l know you will.

-Curtain! Curtain! -Okay.

Luck again, honey.

-Good luck, Danny. -You too.

Gee, l�m scared stiff.

l had butterflies in my stomach before, but now they�re wearing roller skates.

-Don�t bother her, Max. She�s on soon. -Yeah, yeah, l know. l know.

-Who is it? -lt�s Max, honey.

Come in.

This is Mr. Kelly. He�s a detective.

A detective?

You owe $ 1 800 to the Waldorf Plaza Hotel, lady.

You had an expensive suite.

You skipped to Philadelphia and we haven�t seen a dime.

Well, l--

Tell him about your rich uncle with all the cows.

Don�t give me those cows, lady. None of your stories check.

The switchboard says you got no call. The desk says you got no letters.

You�ve got no boyfriends and you�ve got no relatives.

There�s something phony about you.

Come on, now. Who are you? Where did you come from?

-l�m going on in a few minutes. -You have a lot to explain...

...or you�ll be going to jail in a few minutes. Out with it.

Well, a gentleman friend told me to take the Peach Bloom Suite.

He said everything would be taken care of.

Who? What�s his name?

Well, he has no name.

He�s a messenger. Number 701 3.

Yeah? What kind of messenger? Western Union?

He�s gotta know the truth. You gotta tell us both who you are...

...or he won�t let you go on with the show.

All right. All right.

l don�t know how to make you believe it, but--

l�m Terpsichore, the Grecian goddess and l came down from Mt. Parnassus--

On opening nights people get excited and say crazy things.

But l�m not saying crazy things, Max. lt�s all true.

How could l come out of no place and pick you for my agent?

How could l sing and dance like l do, and nobody ever heard of me?

l�m just like your father. Get ahold of yourself.

You talk to people when nobody is around.

Of course, l understand, but some people don�t.

-l�m one of them. Okay, let�s go. -Let me alone. l have to go on.

Having trouble, Kitty?

l certainly am. Thank goodness you�re here.

-ls there somebody with us? -Yes. Everything will be taken care of.

-What will l tell them, Mr. Jordan? -Mr. Jordan is here? You know him?

-Of course. -Holy jumping--

That explains how these goofy things have been happening.

Mr. Jordan is here again. Hello, Mr. Jordan.

How are you?

-She can see him, but l can�t. -Oh, l see. That explains everything.

Sure it does. lf she�s a friend of Jordan�s...

...then she�s a goddess or whatever she says she is. lsn�t that right?

-Hey, what�s going on around here? -You don�t know who Mr. Jordan is.

He was a friend of Joe�s, that fighter l handled, Joe Pendleton.

When Joe died, Mr. Jordan brought him down to Earth...

...and put him inside other people�s bodies.

l heard from Joe last week, Mr. Jordan.

He�s in Sacramento.

He�s using Murdock�s body.

He�s got a couple of kids. He�s doing fine.

-Doing fine? You said he died. -He did.

He was killed in an airplane crash, and then he was cremated.

The two of you are nuttier than a fruitcake. What are you pulling?

You�re coming with me, and you are too.

Ask Mr. Kelly if he�ll accept payment for the hotel bill.

Mr. Jordan wants to know if you�ll accept money.

Oh, he does, huh? lt�s 1 800 bucks. Has Mr. Jordan got it in his pocket?

-Or maybe he ain�t got pockets. -l only got 90 bucks.

Tell Max to answer the telephone.

-Mr. Jordan says to answer the phone. -The phone? lt ain�t ringing.

Hello?

Yeah, this is Corkle. Oh, hello, Sam.

lt�s Sam Hooper, the bookie. How�d he know l was here?

What, Sam? Pacific Handicap?

No, l didn�t call you.

No, no, l don�t wanna place a bet, Sam.

Wait a minute.

Tell him to bet his $90 on Chickie�s Choice.

Mr. Jordan says to bet your $90 on Chickie�s Choice.

Hold it. Chickie�s Choice?

Oh, look, Mr. Jordan, please.

Look, Chickie�s Choice is a rank outsider.

Look, a 20-to-1 shot.

-Look, a dog. -Go on, do as he says.

All right. Hello, Sam?

Ninety bucks on the nose, Chickie�s Choice. Yeah.

Wanna place a bet? The race�ll be on in a few minutes, California time.

l�m not taking tips from a guy that ain�t even here.

That�s it, Sam. My last 90 bucks, Chickie�s Choice.

Yeah.

lf we win, there�s your 1 800 bucks.

That�s right, Mr. Jordan.

-Exactly 1 800 bucks. -Kitty, turn on the radio.

There they go. Donny Dear to the front.

Jackter is second. Count Saffron is third. Glory Girl, fourth.

Montague II is fifth. Pancho, sixth. And Waterboy on the outside.

Where�s Chickie�s Choice?

Waterboy on the outside is second by a head.

Don�t you think you ought to have me put it on Donny Dear?

Into the back stretch. It�s Donny Dear in the lead.

Count Saffron is second by one length. Waterboy is third.

Mr. Jordan, are you sure Chickie�s Choice is in the race?

-And Chickie�s Choice is moving up. -He said Chickie�s Choice!

It�s Donny Dear in front by one length.

Count Saffron is second. And now Chickie�s Choice is moving up.

Fourth! Come on, sweetheart.

Waterboy is third by three-quarters of a length. Chickie�s Choice is fourth.

Into the stretch is Donny Dear in front and Chickie�s Choice coming up fast.

Chickie�s Choice challenging Donny Dear, Donny Dear in front.

Chickie�s Choice is second.

-Come on, come on, please. -Come on, you dog!

And Donny Dear wins by a nose!

l should have known.

Mr. Jordan, how could you do this thing to me?

No, no, wait. Sorry. My mistake. It�s the other way around.

The winner is Chickie�s Choice.

Mr. Jordan, would you like to go to the races with me Saturday afternoon?

How do you like me, Kelly? l get 1 0 percent of a goddess.

Mr. Manion, this can�t wait.

Well, kids, it looks like we�re in the money.

lf you don�t believe it, listen: The Scott-Harringtons--

They�re Park Avenue, and big, are throwing a big party.

Look your prettiest, the address is on the callboard and l�ll see you there.

You�re going with me. l wanna show you off.

This is the happiest night. You killed them.

-l�m glad, Danny. l�m happy for you. -Didn�t hurt too much, did it?

-l had a wonderful time. -Kitty, l want to tell you that--

Come here with me.

Kitty, darling, l wanna tell you that--

That�s what l was trying to say.

l wanted to hold you every time l�ve been near you.

Even when you slapped me in the face.

l promise l�ll never do it again.

l�m sorry, Kitty, l have bad news for you.

l�m afraid you have to go back.

l�ll be waiting for you.

What is it?

What�s the matter?

Oh, nothing, Danny.

Nothing.

Why are you staring at me like that?

Danny, if anything should happen....

-lf we should lose each other.... -Lose each other?

No matter how hard it is for you to understand...

...please believe one thing:

l love you now...

...and l�ll love you always.

Kitty, darling, what is it you�re trying to tell me?

l can�t explain to you, Danny.

-l have to leave you now. -Leave me?

Yes, there�s something--

-Someone l-- -Kitty, what is it?

Please trust me.

And wait for me.

l�ll be back...

...if l can.

lf l can at all, l�ll be at the party.

Sweetheart, you were the tops. And, oh, what an idea l got.

Get those other eight dames down here. l�ll book you a tour.

-��The Nine Original Muses.�� -Take me out of here, Max.

Ain�t you going to the party, honey?

Please, Max.

-Anything wrong with you and Danny? -Please, just let me think.

Sure.

You did the only thing you could do, Kitty.

No. l shouldn�t have done it. l never should have left him.

-Well, let�s tell the driver to turn back. -What am l going to do?

-What am l going to do? -l don�t know. We can�t go both ways.

-l�m sorry, Kitty. We�re leaving tonight. -Tonight?

l don�t understand. You brought me here, and--

No, no, no, honey. You brought me, remember?

Not you, Max. l can�t go.

Not now. Nothing is settled. And Manion.

What will he do if l step out of the show?

Manion? What are you talking about?

l told you, Max, l�m not talking to you.

You mean--? You mean, Mr. Jordan is here?

Yes, he�s sitting right next to you.

Hello, Mr. Jordan. l�m pleased to see you again.

Thank you, Max.

Tell the driver to go to Pier 7, East River. We haven�t much time.

-Pier 7, East River. -East River?

-What are we going there for? -Mr. Jordan�s orders.

l see. l�m sorry, Mr. Jordan.

l didn�t mean to butt in.

-Keep the change. -Thank you.

Tell Max to go for the police.

Mr. Jordan says you�re to go for the police, immediately.

Please, Max, hurry.

Look.

Well, here he comes now.

-Manion! -Yes.

-But who? Why? -lt was Spike, his partner.

Sole owner of the gambling casino now, at least till the police catch him.

-How dreadful. -Perhaps.

But if the show had failed, he would�ve murdered Danny Miller one hour ago.

So you see, Kitty, that�s why it was necessary for you to stay until now.

lt isn�t necessary any longer.

But it is. lt is because....

-Because it�s different now. -You saved Danny�s life.

-That is all we had for you to do. -l don�t care. l don�t care.

l love him and l want to stay.

lt wasn�t meant to be, Kitty.

Your mission is accomplished and now you must return.

That�s what we agreed upon.

But l don�t want it that way anymore.

Please, Mr. Jordan. Please.

l don�t wanna be a goddess. l just wanna be a human being.

l want to get married and have a home and be with Danny, always.

Listen.

-We must go now, my dear. -No.

l�m not going. l�m not going!

Don�t fight it, Terpsichore.

No! No!

l�m Kitty Pendleton!

You can�t make me! l�m going back to Danny!

l�m going back!

Oh, Danny. Danny, l�ve come back.

He tried to take me away, but l�ve come back to you.

Don�t be angry with me. Don�t you understand? l�ve come back.

-l�m never going to leave you again. -Champagne?

Don�t spread this around, but this is the first time l ever tasted champagne.

What�s the matter with Danny? Why doesn�t he talk to me?

Eddie. Eddie!

lt�s no use.

They can�t see or hear you.

Please, Mr. Jordan.

Please let him hear me.

Please let him see me.

Just for one moment.

lt has to be this way. You can�t change destiny.

Mr. Jordan...

...l want to cry...

...but l can�t.

There are no tears.

Mr. Jordan...

-...at least let me cry. -You can�t anymore.

Tears are only for mortals.

lt�s an advantage they have over us.

Come, Terpsichore.

Yes, Mr. Jordan.

Danny?

What�s the matter, kid? You�ve got a smash hit...

...and you�re moping around like a guy that--

lt�s Kitty�s. She�s here.

No.

She was here...

...but she�s gone.

What are you talking about? l don�t understand.

Neither did l.

But now l�m beginning to understand many things.

-Don�t look for her. You won�t find her. -This is her coat. She must be here.

Tried to tell me right after the show.

Tried to tell you what?

l don�t know.

l sometimes wonder if she ever was real.

l only know she came out of nowhere...

...and vanished the same way.

He was invisible. How could he tell you there would be a murder?

Mr. Jordan told her and she told me.

Kitty Pendleton was at the murder scene and hasn�t been seen since.

-Where is she now? -Mr. Jordan took her back.

Oh, now l suppose she�s living up in the clouds...

...in a civilization that never even existed.

That�s right. That�s just where she is.

Looks like we�ll have to cart this guy off to the nut factory.

Wait, l�m innocent. l never saw the girl before that first day.

She came in and flung her arms around my neck and she said:

��Max, just think, they took me out of the chorus and gave me the lead.

l�m gonna play Terpsichore and l want you to be my agent.��

Wait. Do you expect us to believe...

...that a dame just bounced in out of no place?

Max, just think, they took me out of the chorus and gave me the lead.

l�m going to play Terpsichore and l want you to be my agent.

l must be leaving now, Terpsichore.

What�s going to happen, Mr. Jordan, now that l�ve lost him?

You haven�t.

Would you like me to show you?

l wouldn�t do this for anyone else, Terpsichore...

...but l think you�ve earned it.

Come.

Where are we going?

Merely a few years into the future.

You see, my dear, how simple it is? Here we are, witnessing the future.

And there l am, still on the job.

Look.

Danny.

But he seems just about the same.

The spirit never really ages, my dear.

ln all these years, he�s never had a failure.

There�s a legend about him on Broadway.

They say he was kissed by the Muse.

Will he look for me? Will he find me?

-Will he remember me? -Well, let�s wait and see.

Miller, Daniel.

Why--

-Why, it�s-- -Yes.

Thank you, Mr. Jordan.