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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:08,758 [CHEERFUL, SIMPLE TUNE PLAYING] 2 00:00:10,719 --> 00:00:12,262 Ho, ho, ho, guys. 3 00:00:12,387 --> 00:00:14,472 Ho, ho, ho, indeed. 4 00:00:14,597 --> 00:00:16,808 Here he is, dear old Santa Clogs, 5 00:00:16,933 --> 00:00:20,145 handing out treats to the recently inconvenienced. 6 00:00:20,270 --> 00:00:23,231 Marv Putnam has put me in charge 7 00:00:23,356 --> 00:00:27,444 of doing some brand image rehabilitation for Softees 8 00:00:27,569 --> 00:00:29,237 after our bloody man mitts 9 00:00:29,362 --> 00:00:33,658 caused a bit of a sewer clog situation, allegedly. 10 00:00:33,783 --> 00:00:37,245 Well, Marv will finally see what old Ken Davies is capable of 11 00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:39,789 when he is given total control of a project. 12 00:00:39,914 --> 00:00:42,792 These may look like ordinary ice creams, but in actual fact, 13 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:47,005 they are sample rolls of peppermint-scented toilet paper. 14 00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:48,923 [KIDS SPITTING, COUGHING] 15 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:52,010 This isn't ice cream! It's toilet paper! 16 00:00:52,135 --> 00:00:53,845 Why does it smell like dessert? 17 00:00:53,970 --> 00:00:55,930 It's peppermint-infused tissue, 18 00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:58,433 madam, in the shape of the thing it smells of. 19 00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:00,226 What about that do you not understand? I'm sorry. 20 00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:03,021 No. No, no, chill! You have to chill! 21 00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:04,314 [KIDS SCREAMING] 22 00:01:04,439 --> 00:01:06,358 Drive. Drive! 23 00:01:06,483 --> 00:01:07,901 -Drive! KID: Keep throwing! 24 00:01:08,026 --> 00:01:09,819 KEN: And remember, Softees is quality 25 00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:10,904 because Softees cares. 26 00:01:11,029 --> 00:01:11,863 Drive. 27 00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:15,533 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 28 00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:44,646 Hey. 29 00:01:45,438 --> 00:01:46,481 [BALL THUDDING] 30 00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:48,817 I can't see you. 31 00:01:50,276 --> 00:01:52,112 -Approved. -Thank you. 32 00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:54,072 Ned got Oscar to pay for food and gas 33 00:01:54,197 --> 00:01:56,032 for me and Detrick today. 34 00:01:56,157 --> 00:01:57,951 We're investigating this farm three hours south of here 35 00:01:58,076 --> 00:01:59,452 that might be a cult. 36 00:01:59,577 --> 00:02:01,705 They might also just love growing squash, 37 00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:05,667 and all shop at the same poncho store, but come on. 38 00:02:05,792 --> 00:02:07,377 Also my neighbor's son is there, 39 00:02:07,502 --> 00:02:09,004 and he missed his mom's birthday, 40 00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:11,506 so I promised her we'd get to the bottom of it. 41 00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:13,758 I'm not a hundred percent sure it's a cult, 42 00:02:13,883 --> 00:02:16,594 but it's a fun story for Mare. 43 00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:22,350 And I got the gas money approved, so that's fun too. 44 00:02:22,475 --> 00:02:24,644 Hey. Ready to go? 45 00:02:24,769 --> 00:02:27,939 -Um... I'm not going. -What? 46 00:02:28,064 --> 00:02:30,025 Last night, I had a messed up dream. 47 00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:33,069 There was a guy in it. He-He was wearing a red poncho. 48 00:02:33,194 --> 00:02:34,821 He handed me a robe. 49 00:02:34,946 --> 00:02:37,657 And he said, Brother Detrick, don this. 50 00:02:37,782 --> 00:02:40,827 I didn't even know I knew what "don" meant. 51 00:02:40,952 --> 00:02:43,329 -But I-- I donned it. -So you dream-joined the cult? 52 00:02:43,455 --> 00:02:46,791 I just don't think I should go. I'm too susceptible. 53 00:02:46,916 --> 00:02:49,419 Oh, this is the squash collective? 54 00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:51,463 I can go with you if Detrick can't. 55 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:53,923 Uh, why? So you can be my bodyguard? 56 00:02:54,049 --> 00:02:56,134 No. Because it's my favorite stall 57 00:02:56,259 --> 00:02:57,510 at the farmer's market. 58 00:02:57,635 --> 00:02:59,179 Love to see where they grow it all. 59 00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:02,098 If someone tries to hurt you, I will just let them. 60 00:03:02,223 --> 00:03:03,558 -Can I come? -All right. 61 00:03:03,683 --> 00:03:04,726 -Yeah? -Yeah. 62 00:03:05,810 --> 00:03:06,895 Ah... 63 00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:09,189 Don't drink the Kool-Aid, okay? 64 00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:10,648 -I won't. -Okay. 65 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:27,415 A few weeks ago, in the archive room, 66 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:31,336 someone found a picture of Barry when he was 30, 67 00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:33,421 and he was very handsome. 68 00:03:33,546 --> 00:03:37,592 So that image stuck in my mind for several days. 69 00:03:37,717 --> 00:03:40,053 But then Barry did something very inappropriate, 70 00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:43,765 because when you think about a man that way, 71 00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:46,893 he knows that he can come into your dreams, 72 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:49,396 and he can have his way with you. 73 00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:54,317 I am very sorry to say that Barry took that liberty. 74 00:03:54,442 --> 00:03:59,280 If it happened once, it would be okay, because I was willing. 75 00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,366 There was a mutual attraction. 76 00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:03,326 But then it happened every night! 77 00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:07,706 Like, Barry has come every night, 78 00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:12,919 unbidden, into my dreams, and he has had me. 79 00:04:13,044 --> 00:04:16,715 I have my needs, like everybody else, 80 00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:20,135 maybe more, but he is insatiable. 81 00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,971 And then the day after, I come into the office, 82 00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:25,849 and he pretends like nothing happened. 83 00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:27,976 How dares he? 84 00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:31,146 [MESSAGE CHIMES] 85 00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:35,608 New comment on my South Pacific review at the Stranahan? 86 00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:38,486 "Do you get paid by the adverb over there? 87 00:04:38,611 --> 00:04:40,864 Write less pretentiously, asshat." 88 00:04:40,989 --> 00:04:44,117 Oh, man. Gomudhens10 strikes again. 89 00:04:44,242 --> 00:04:45,952 -It's brutal. -You know who this is? 90 00:04:46,077 --> 00:04:49,414 Gomudhens10 is a troll on our website 91 00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:52,584 who pounces on us every time we make a tiny mistake 92 00:04:52,709 --> 00:04:54,919 and also includes some weirdly dated 93 00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:57,297 internet meme insult from 2012. 94 00:04:57,422 --> 00:05:00,300 "Wow, your third article about brook trout this week. 95 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:03,345 It's amaze-balls how you refuse to broaden your scope." 96 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,388 "Er-mer-gerd. 97 00:05:05,513 --> 00:05:07,640 Dangling modifier alert." 98 00:05:07,766 --> 00:05:09,768 I don't-- I don't understand any of that. 99 00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:12,979 "Epic fact check fail." [LAUGHS] 100 00:05:13,104 --> 00:05:16,107 This is funny. Gomudhens10 is funny. 101 00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:17,484 Yeah, they're so mean, 102 00:05:17,609 --> 00:05:19,027 -but they're always right. -Mm, yeah. 103 00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:23,698 Not-- Not that they're right in this instance, boss. 104 00:05:23,823 --> 00:05:25,909 Yeah, that's totally wrong. 105 00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:27,994 Relax! Stop throwing that! 106 00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:29,371 MOM: Get away from the truck, kids. 107 00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:31,581 -[SIGHS] KEN: Drive! Drive! Drive! 108 00:05:31,706 --> 00:05:32,999 KID: Keep throwing! 109 00:05:33,124 --> 00:05:34,626 KEN: And remember, Softees is quality 110 00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:36,002 because Softees cares. Drive. 111 00:05:36,127 --> 00:05:39,005 So you're saying this wasn't your idea? 112 00:05:39,130 --> 00:05:40,924 Well, I mean, for the sake of gallantry, 113 00:05:41,049 --> 00:05:42,550 I would say it was my idea. 114 00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:45,095 But to be completely honest, 115 00:05:45,220 --> 00:05:46,471 I'm compelled to say 116 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:49,557 that it was the idea of someone else. 117 00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:55,772 Named...Nicole Lee. 118 00:05:55,897 --> 00:05:57,482 The girl from the newspaper? 119 00:05:57,607 --> 00:06:01,444 She can be a forceful little madam. 120 00:06:01,569 --> 00:06:05,281 Well, I don't know what series of decisions led us here, Ken, 121 00:06:05,407 --> 00:06:08,034 but Channel 5 offered to have you come on this afternoon 122 00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:10,078 -and apologize. -For which mistake, sorry? 123 00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:12,622 For as many as you can fit into eight minutes. 124 00:06:12,747 --> 00:06:14,249 That's all they've given us. 125 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:18,545 Mm-hmm. Well, I would be absolutely delighted to do that. 126 00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:22,799 Serving children ice cream that turned out to be toilet paper. 127 00:06:22,924 --> 00:06:26,052 We were, indeed, serving children ice cream 128 00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:27,762 that turned out to be toilet paper. 129 00:06:27,887 --> 00:06:29,514 Yeah, that's a good assessment. 130 00:06:29,639 --> 00:06:31,057 All right, if we leave right now, 131 00:06:31,182 --> 00:06:32,892 it'll take us like four hours and change. 132 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:34,978 [CLATTERS] 133 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:35,979 NED: Oh. 134 00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:38,898 -Wow. -You can just sit on it. 135 00:06:39,024 --> 00:06:41,359 -It's clean trash. -It's clean trash? 136 00:06:41,484 --> 00:06:44,195 -Uh-huh. It's dry. -All right. 137 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:47,699 You had a dream where you had sex with Barry? 138 00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:49,242 No. Did you hear what I said? 139 00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:53,955 Barry came into my dreams and just took me. 140 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,332 It wasn't like a dream that you make up. 141 00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:57,959 It was him. 142 00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:00,170 I'm confused. Like a nightmare? 143 00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:01,671 Oh, no. 144 00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:03,381 Oh, no, no. [CHUCKLES] 145 00:07:03,506 --> 00:07:04,799 Oh, no, he was wonderful, heh. 146 00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:08,595 Very surprising. I can't complain about that. No. 147 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:12,307 It's just that I think he's an incubus, 148 00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,518 like he is a sexual demon. 149 00:07:15,643 --> 00:07:18,772 Right. Hmm. Maybe that's something 150 00:07:18,897 --> 00:07:21,107 you should talk about with a professional. 151 00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:23,193 Oh, yes. 152 00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:25,236 Right. 153 00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,740 Oh, man. This is so much fun. 154 00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:30,492 -Yeah. This is great. -I love it. 155 00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:33,995 -[CHUCKLES] -It'd be so great. 156 00:07:35,038 --> 00:07:36,581 Road trip. 157 00:07:36,706 --> 00:07:38,792 -Road trip. Road trip. -Road trip. 158 00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:41,503 -Road trip. Road trip. -Road trip. Road trip. 159 00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,713 [SNORING] 160 00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:47,008 Kill, fuck, marry everybody in the office. 161 00:07:49,344 --> 00:07:50,679 I'd marry them all. 162 00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:52,555 [SIGHS] 163 00:07:52,681 --> 00:07:54,891 -You? -Fuck Ken. 164 00:07:57,435 --> 00:08:00,021 -God. -And kill Ken. 165 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:01,314 Before or after? 166 00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:02,607 [LAUGHS] 167 00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:03,900 -Same time. -Might be easier. 168 00:08:04,025 --> 00:08:05,443 -Marry Nicole. -Yeah. 169 00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:06,945 -Marry Nicole? -Of course. 170 00:08:07,070 --> 00:08:08,530 -My best friend. -She's great. 171 00:08:08,655 --> 00:08:12,033 I hope I'm too smart to join a cult, but who knows? 172 00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:14,160 I fell for Blue Apron, so clearly there's a hole... 173 00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:16,121 -[LAUGHS] -...in my life, right? 174 00:08:16,246 --> 00:08:19,499 I think the right cult could totally get me. 175 00:08:19,624 --> 00:08:20,583 -You? -Yes. 176 00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:22,043 Skeptical you? No way. 177 00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:23,628 No, sometimes I think I enjoy 178 00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:26,172 the structure of the Army too much. 179 00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,508 You never have to think about what to wear. 180 00:08:28,633 --> 00:08:30,844 Ugh, you just eat whatever's under the foil. 181 00:08:32,846 --> 00:08:34,014 Hey. sheep. 182 00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,100 Mm. 183 00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:41,104 [CLICKS TONGUE] Oh, that one-- That one looks like Flossie. 184 00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:43,231 -See that one? -Flossie? 185 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:48,069 Oh, my parents got me a, uh, a pet lamb when I was 7. 186 00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:50,280 Wait, but I thought you grew up in Cleveland Heights. 187 00:08:50,405 --> 00:08:51,948 Yeah, we went to a petting zoo... 188 00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:53,158 Uh-huh. 189 00:08:53,283 --> 00:08:56,202 ...and I fell in love with this lamb, 190 00:08:56,327 --> 00:08:58,204 and I just begged my parents to get me one 191 00:08:58,329 --> 00:08:59,998 for the longest time, and I kept at it, 192 00:09:00,123 --> 00:09:03,126 and eventually they got me Flossie. 193 00:09:03,251 --> 00:09:04,169 Wow. 194 00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:06,504 And Flo-- Flossie was a live sheep. 195 00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:08,381 A lamb, yes. 196 00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:09,841 And she was amazing. 197 00:09:09,966 --> 00:09:12,677 I loved her, but she was never fully housebroken. 198 00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:15,221 -Mm-hmm. -And so eventually, 199 00:09:15,347 --> 00:09:17,766 my dad sent her away to go live on a farm. 200 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:21,394 [CHUCKLES QUIETLY] 201 00:09:21,519 --> 00:09:22,896 What? 202 00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:24,981 -[LAUGHS] -What? 203 00:09:26,608 --> 00:09:28,109 I mean, there's like 204 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,487 300 unrelatable things about what you just said. 205 00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:32,072 -No, no. -First of all, 206 00:09:32,197 --> 00:09:34,491 that you were a young boy who desired a sheep. 207 00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:36,701 Then, your parents actually bought you one. 208 00:09:36,826 --> 00:09:37,827 -Mm-hmm. -Like, bought you 209 00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:39,621 a full-on live sheep, 210 00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:41,623 and now you think the poor thing 211 00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:44,084 [LAUGHING] lived to a ripe old age on a farmstead. 212 00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:47,504 -They sent photos. -I love it so much. 213 00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:51,174 You had the childhood of, like, a Hungarian prince. 214 00:09:51,299 --> 00:09:52,717 Don't make it a class thing. 215 00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:54,511 -Are you kidding? -I had a dog too. 216 00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:57,097 -Sheep aren't that expensive. -Really? What did Flossie eat? 217 00:09:58,348 --> 00:09:59,766 Cook would give it our leftovers. 218 00:09:59,891 --> 00:10:01,059 [LAUGHING] What? 219 00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:02,977 [LAUGHING] No, I didn't have a... 220 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:06,398 Flossie's assistant gave it hay and flowers. 221 00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:08,942 Yeah, I was a little worried when Ned asked to come along. 222 00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,735 It meant he didn't trust me or something, 223 00:10:10,860 --> 00:10:12,362 but he's actually been really fun. 224 00:10:14,531 --> 00:10:17,158 Uh, Oscar, do you have the order number for-- 225 00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:20,453 "Asshat" is just such an unforgivably stupid word. 226 00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:22,455 "Unforgivably"? Another adverb. 227 00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:24,582 Okay, well, it's a vile thing to call someone. 228 00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:26,960 Dude, you gotta move on, okay? 229 00:10:27,085 --> 00:10:28,753 Oh, no, no, no. I think it's funny. 230 00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:30,296 That's where I'm coming from. 231 00:10:30,422 --> 00:10:34,050 But all I'm saying is how-- how stupid it is. 232 00:10:34,175 --> 00:10:37,262 Because-- What? So in this scenario, what? 233 00:10:37,387 --> 00:10:40,724 I'm a little hat worn by an ass? An ass wears a hat? 234 00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:42,058 [GROANS] 235 00:10:42,183 --> 00:10:45,145 Or am I an ass-shaped hat? What? [LAUGHS] 236 00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:46,771 -Do you see what I'm saying? -Mm-hmm. 237 00:10:46,896 --> 00:10:49,024 I-- You just-- I wanna find them. 238 00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:52,694 I wanna find them and-- and grab them and just... 239 00:10:54,904 --> 00:10:57,449 Explain to them how funny it is, 240 00:10:57,574 --> 00:10:59,909 the whole scenario, how amusing it is to me. 241 00:11:00,035 --> 00:11:02,162 That's all. Because you can't-- 242 00:11:02,287 --> 00:11:04,664 But you can't because it's computers 243 00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:06,249 and it's internet, 244 00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:07,876 so you can't tell them 'cause you can't find them 245 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,128 -'cause there's no way-- -Track down their IP address. 246 00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:12,839 -IP address? -Yeah, it's traceable. 247 00:11:12,964 --> 00:11:15,300 -I can track them. -No, no, no, Oscar. 248 00:11:15,425 --> 00:11:17,927 Look at me, dude. Revenge is a very dark road 249 00:11:18,053 --> 00:11:19,929 and it can be surprisingly expensive. 250 00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:22,974 What road? We're chatting, and I'm chatting, and that's it. 251 00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:24,476 But thank you. I appreciate it. 252 00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:26,269 Okay, but if you do wanna go down this road, 253 00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:31,107 y-you'd call IT, and the number is 3-2-7-1. 254 00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:34,444 Thank you, Adam. I'll just take it. Just-- 255 00:11:35,445 --> 00:11:36,404 Thank you. 256 00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:42,786 I never told you to rent an ice cream truck. 257 00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:45,038 I don't know if I've ever even spoken to you. 258 00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:46,998 Mm-hmm. The important thing is 259 00:11:47,123 --> 00:11:49,668 Marv thinks it was your idea, 260 00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:50,835 so we are where we are. 261 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,170 -But--? -Does this ring a bell? 262 00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:53,672 "Dear Ken, my name is Nicole Lee. 263 00:11:53,797 --> 00:11:55,340 I would like to shadow you." 264 00:11:55,465 --> 00:11:58,468 I wrote that two years ago and you never responded. 265 00:11:58,593 --> 00:12:01,096 This is me responding. Welcome aboard. 266 00:12:02,138 --> 00:12:05,558 You are Joe Radlingshaffer, 267 00:12:05,684 --> 00:12:08,812 host of WNWO's Afternoon Delights. 268 00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:10,271 -Mr. Davies... -Hmm? 269 00:12:10,397 --> 00:12:13,024 what is your response and Softee's response 270 00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:15,026 -to the sewer crisis? -Mm-hmm. 271 00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:18,154 Hello, Madame Radlingshaffer. 272 00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:20,031 What? What is that face for? 273 00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:22,367 -You just...seem weird. -Uh-huh. 274 00:12:22,492 --> 00:12:23,952 I think we need you to come across 275 00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:26,788 -in a more relatable way. -Shall I lose my tie? 276 00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:29,374 Mm! No, I don't think that's gonna get you there. 277 00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:30,709 Damn it. 278 00:12:30,834 --> 00:12:33,461 I know what Ken's doing. He needs a scapegoat. 279 00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:34,796 But guess what? 280 00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,631 Goats climb fast. 281 00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:40,844 Hey, um, Detrick was gonna read over 282 00:12:40,969 --> 00:12:43,930 our interview questions out loud so we could go over them. 283 00:12:44,055 --> 00:12:46,266 -Oh, cool. -Uh-huh. 284 00:12:46,391 --> 00:12:49,394 But we don't need to go over them. I bet they're great. 285 00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:51,312 -Thanks. -[CELL PHONE RINGS] 286 00:12:52,147 --> 00:12:53,606 [CELL PHONE BEEPS] 287 00:12:53,732 --> 00:12:56,151 -Mare Pritti. -Mare, hi. Bethany DeAdona. 288 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,861 I write for Cleveland Today Magazine. 289 00:12:57,986 --> 00:13:00,196 I read your piece about the Toledo sewer clog. 290 00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:02,574 Really impressive work. 291 00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:04,826 That's-- Wow. 292 00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:06,745 -Thank you so much. -So I'm interested in... 293 00:13:06,870 --> 00:13:08,288 -Get that spider? -...journalistic independence 294 00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:09,789 -from corporate ownership. -Oh. 295 00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:11,666 -Do you have a minute to talk? -Yeah, sure. 296 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,209 Really fantastic reporting, by the way. 297 00:13:13,335 --> 00:13:15,045 I mean, thank you for the kind words. 298 00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:16,629 You deserve them. 299 00:13:16,755 --> 00:13:18,298 It must have been really stressful 300 00:13:18,423 --> 00:13:19,924 to stand up to corporate like that. 301 00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:21,384 Yeah, it was stressful 302 00:13:21,509 --> 00:13:22,761 -to, um, stand up-- -[MOUTHS WORDS] 303 00:13:22,886 --> 00:13:24,512 -Cup? Do you have a cup? -[WHISPERS] No, I don't. 304 00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:26,598 [NORMALLY] To stand up to, uh, corporate like that. 305 00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:27,849 -Um... -[WHISPERS] Can I use this? 306 00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:31,227 -Uh-huh. -And, uh, I-- 307 00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:32,729 -Are you there? -You know what? Bethany, 308 00:13:32,854 --> 00:13:34,647 could I put you on the briefest of holds? 309 00:13:34,773 --> 00:13:36,483 Sure, no problem. 310 00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:38,526 -Thank you so much. -[CELL PHONE BEEPS] 311 00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,028 -What the...are you doing? -I'm just-- 312 00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:41,529 -I got a system. -Just smush it. 313 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:43,490 I'm not gonna smush it. I have a system. 314 00:13:43,615 --> 00:13:45,492 -Just smush it. -It's humane. 315 00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:46,951 -Can you just please be quiet? -Sure. 316 00:13:47,077 --> 00:13:49,162 -This is good, right? -Yeah, it's fantastic. 317 00:13:49,287 --> 00:13:51,373 Okay, so... Thank you. 318 00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:52,624 -Okay. -[CELL PHONE BEEPS] 319 00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:54,334 Thank you, Bethany. I'm here, 320 00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:56,044 and I have a couple of minutes for sure. 321 00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,254 Great. So I just wanted to get some more details. 322 00:13:58,380 --> 00:13:59,881 You had to weigh the public good 323 00:14:00,006 --> 00:14:02,467 -against Enervate's interests. -You know, I-- 324 00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:04,094 And you held your own owners 325 00:14:04,219 --> 00:14:05,762 -accountable. -Mm-hmm. 326 00:14:05,887 --> 00:14:07,931 Yeah, that's the first thing that comes to mind. 327 00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:09,474 That is what I was thinking about 328 00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:11,643 -when I started the article. -[WHISPERS] Is it on me? 329 00:14:11,768 --> 00:14:14,229 You take a lot of courage to write an article like that. 330 00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:15,188 Uh-huh. 331 00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:16,398 I'm having trouble hearing you. 332 00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:17,982 [MOUTHS WORDS] Roll up the window. 333 00:14:18,108 --> 00:14:20,318 [NORMALLY] I know. I'm sure it's hard to hear me. 334 00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:23,196 -Hello? -Yes. 335 00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:25,198 Great, whenever you're ready. 336 00:14:25,323 --> 00:14:26,991 -[NED YELPING] -Is everything okay? 337 00:14:27,117 --> 00:14:28,535 No, I'm just so excited about-- 338 00:14:28,660 --> 00:14:30,495 Woo-hoo! --the article. This... 339 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,122 -Yeah, it's really good. -[GROANING] 340 00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:34,666 You know what? I'm just gonna move you off speaker. 341 00:14:36,167 --> 00:14:37,335 -[NORMALLY] Is it on me? -Sorry. 342 00:14:37,460 --> 00:14:38,712 -Is it on me? -I'm visiting my 343 00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:40,046 grandfather right now. 344 00:14:41,131 --> 00:14:43,591 Barry, I was in the mail room, 345 00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:47,387 and I found this box with your name on it. 346 00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:50,223 It's very small, but I wonder what it is. 347 00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:52,308 I'm so curious. 348 00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,394 -Thanks. -You're welcome. 349 00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:56,980 I'm trying to be rational and practical 350 00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:58,732 about this Barry situation. 351 00:14:58,857 --> 00:15:02,318 Of course, I sprinkled salt on my doorstep 352 00:15:02,444 --> 00:15:04,070 and on my window sills. 353 00:15:04,195 --> 00:15:06,448 That did nothing. 354 00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:09,451 Now, my psychic told me that there is another method 355 00:15:09,576 --> 00:15:12,245 that is scientifically proven 356 00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:15,040 that is going to break the incubus. 357 00:15:15,165 --> 00:15:17,792 Oh, wow. That looks nice. 358 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,919 What the hell? I think you should wear it 359 00:15:20,045 --> 00:15:22,881 for seven days and seven nights without showering and then 360 00:15:23,006 --> 00:15:25,508 bury it under a red rock with the full moon. 361 00:15:25,633 --> 00:15:26,968 [SNIFFS, GRUNTS] 362 00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:29,095 Garlic. Yuck. 363 00:15:31,348 --> 00:15:32,515 No, thanks. 364 00:15:33,725 --> 00:15:34,559 [SIGHS] 365 00:15:36,853 --> 00:15:37,729 [CHAIR CLATTERS] 366 00:15:39,356 --> 00:15:41,232 What do you mean even psychics can be wrong? 367 00:15:41,358 --> 00:15:44,861 What the hell? I give you $900 for the amulet, okay? 368 00:15:44,986 --> 00:15:46,237 I want my money back. 369 00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:48,239 [GASPS] 370 00:15:48,365 --> 00:15:50,950 Oh, you see him coming around? 371 00:15:51,076 --> 00:15:52,660 Wow, you're positive? 372 00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:56,790 Oh, because he's shy. I know. 373 00:15:56,915 --> 00:15:59,334 No, I know sometimes I can be intimidating. 374 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:02,462 I will give him another chance for sure. Okay, s�. 375 00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:05,048 Yes, yes. I will wire you 100 for the call. 376 00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:06,549 Thank you so much. Ta-ta. 377 00:16:06,675 --> 00:16:10,470 -[SIGHING] Mm. -[CELL PHONE BEEPS OFF] 378 00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:12,263 And what about the conflict of interest? 379 00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:15,392 Is it true your editor-in-chief is a former Softees employee? 380 00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:19,270 Yes, Ned Sampson. He was super heroic. 381 00:16:19,396 --> 00:16:20,772 He, uh, stood up to corporate 382 00:16:20,897 --> 00:16:23,024 and gave me full latitude to report as I saw fit. 383 00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:24,734 Good for him. 384 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,861 What's his journalistic philosophy and background? 385 00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:30,407 Yeah, you know, he has a lot of principles, 386 00:16:30,532 --> 00:16:32,075 wonderful principles, 387 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,077 but he's not, like, weighed down by experience. 388 00:16:34,202 --> 00:16:35,870 You know? 389 00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:38,331 But he trusts his reporters, and that's why he's great. 390 00:16:38,456 --> 00:16:39,666 He knows when to get out of the way. 391 00:16:39,791 --> 00:16:41,626 -Sounds like a dream. -[CHUCKLES] 392 00:16:41,751 --> 00:16:43,920 -He's really that hands-off? -Oh, my God, beyond. 393 00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:45,130 Yeah, very hands-off. 394 00:16:45,255 --> 00:16:46,506 I think in this story, 395 00:16:46,631 --> 00:16:48,008 the readers read it before he did. 396 00:16:48,133 --> 00:16:50,552 Wow. Mare, I'll update you when we publish. 397 00:16:50,677 --> 00:16:52,345 -Okay, great. -Thanks so much for this. 398 00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:53,638 -[CELL PHONE BEEPS OFF] -Bethany? Yeah-- 399 00:16:54,389 --> 00:16:55,557 That went great. 400 00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:58,727 Oh, my God. 401 00:16:58,852 --> 00:17:00,812 It's my first time being on the other side. 402 00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:02,147 -Uh-huh. -[CHUCKLES] 403 00:17:02,272 --> 00:17:03,189 [SIGHS] 404 00:17:03,314 --> 00:17:04,941 -Great-- -[GASPS] 405 00:17:05,066 --> 00:17:07,277 Jesus. Is that the spider? 406 00:17:07,402 --> 00:17:08,570 -It's a raisin. -Oh. 407 00:17:13,742 --> 00:17:15,035 Yeah, I think my dad took me 408 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:16,870 to a pencil sharpener museum around here. 409 00:17:16,995 --> 00:17:18,705 Hey, are those your interview questions? 410 00:17:18,830 --> 00:17:19,622 Mm-hmm. 411 00:17:19,748 --> 00:17:20,623 I can read through them 412 00:17:20,749 --> 00:17:22,250 now that we're stationary. 413 00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:24,753 Oh. Thought you didn't need to look them over. 414 00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:27,714 Oh. Well, we have time now, so-- 415 00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:33,511 Uh-huh. 416 00:17:34,888 --> 00:17:38,516 Hey, I hope I didn't say anything weird in the car. 417 00:17:38,641 --> 00:17:39,768 -Oh! To the reporter? -Yeah. 418 00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:41,686 No, no, no, no. That was great. 419 00:17:41,811 --> 00:17:43,271 'Cause I wasn't trying to make it sound like you-- 420 00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,731 No, no, no. 421 00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:46,858 You're finally getting your due. I'm so happy. 422 00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:47,942 Okay. 423 00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:51,571 Eh... 424 00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:54,032 I don't believe in the exposed knee. 425 00:17:54,157 --> 00:17:57,243 Back home, we would call these the schoolmaster's delight. 426 00:17:57,369 --> 00:17:59,162 I swore off them for a reason. 427 00:17:59,287 --> 00:18:02,082 You look like the American half of a Ninety-Day Fianc�e. 428 00:18:02,207 --> 00:18:05,502 -Should I do an American accent? -I would like to hear that. 429 00:18:05,627 --> 00:18:07,545 [IN AMERICAN ACCENT] I'd like a quarter pounder with cheese. 430 00:18:07,671 --> 00:18:09,506 -I can do it better. -Pretty good. 431 00:18:09,631 --> 00:18:11,383 -Quarter. -Quarter. 432 00:18:11,508 --> 00:18:13,176 -Quarter. -Get me a quarter pounder 433 00:18:13,301 --> 00:18:15,428 with cheese for my mom. 434 00:18:16,763 --> 00:18:18,515 -Perfect. -[NORMALLY] No notes. 435 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:19,891 You pick that up so fast. 436 00:18:20,016 --> 00:18:21,059 I tell you what, 437 00:18:21,184 --> 00:18:23,311 if you play your cards right, 438 00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:25,563 you could be my new work wife. 439 00:18:25,689 --> 00:18:27,691 Oh, I've stunned her. 440 00:18:27,816 --> 00:18:29,359 Poor girl. 441 00:18:32,487 --> 00:18:33,571 MARE [QUIETLY]: Okay... 442 00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,031 NED: This is it? -[NORMALLY] Yeah. 443 00:18:36,908 --> 00:18:37,784 Great. 444 00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:42,497 Hey, guy-- I'm so sorry. You're gonna have to stay back. 445 00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:45,500 The cult dude is kind of secretive in an on-brand way. 446 00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:46,668 Alleged cult dude. 447 00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:51,673 All right. 448 00:18:53,008 --> 00:18:54,259 MARE: Hi there. NED: Hey. 449 00:18:54,384 --> 00:18:56,219 MARE: Shalom. NED: Shalom? 450 00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:57,345 MARE: I don't know. 451 00:18:58,847 --> 00:19:01,558 Well, [SIGHS] I found out who the troll is. 452 00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:03,059 -No. -You did not. 453 00:19:03,184 --> 00:19:04,477 OSCAR: I spoke to IT. 454 00:19:04,602 --> 00:19:06,021 I thought you guys might be curious, 455 00:19:06,146 --> 00:19:07,814 given that it's someone in the building. 456 00:19:07,939 --> 00:19:09,441 -What? -What's that? 457 00:19:09,566 --> 00:19:11,776 But since you're not, I won't tell you who she is. 458 00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:13,319 TRAVIS: She? DETRICK: Hold up. 459 00:19:13,445 --> 00:19:16,031 -Gomudhens10 is a woman. -Yeah? 460 00:19:17,741 --> 00:19:19,909 I mean, psh, of course it could be a woman. 461 00:19:20,035 --> 00:19:23,204 -Anything could be a woman. -All right, come on. Who is it? 462 00:19:23,329 --> 00:19:24,914 [GROANS] I-- I want to-- 463 00:19:25,040 --> 00:19:26,624 I'm at my limit with this coyness, Oscar. 464 00:19:26,750 --> 00:19:27,959 Just tell us who it is. 465 00:19:28,084 --> 00:19:30,795 Okay. The IP address Gomudhens10 466 00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:33,840 can be traced to Suite 812, 467 00:19:33,965 --> 00:19:36,676 -Anne Putnam's office. TRAVIS: Oh, my stars. 468 00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:38,762 -Marv's assistant. ADAM: There's no way. 469 00:19:38,887 --> 00:19:40,221 Anne calls my kids cherubs. 470 00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:42,849 -Even Wayne, the worst one. -She's beautiful. 471 00:19:42,974 --> 00:19:44,184 ADAM: She's just like a sweet lady. 472 00:19:44,309 --> 00:19:45,810 Mm, I don't know. She once thanked me 473 00:19:45,935 --> 00:19:47,771 to take my feet off my own desk. 474 00:19:47,896 --> 00:19:49,481 Why would someone Anne's age 475 00:19:49,606 --> 00:19:52,108 use words like lame-sauce or noob? 476 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:53,693 No, doesn't make any sense. 477 00:19:53,818 --> 00:19:56,071 It makes perfect sense. 478 00:19:56,196 --> 00:20:00,909 I see it often in people over 50. 479 00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:03,453 They get trapped in the year that they join Facebook. 480 00:20:03,578 --> 00:20:07,916 It's-- It's as if the technology sends their brain into shock 481 00:20:08,041 --> 00:20:10,710 and their online personalities get frozen in time. 482 00:20:12,170 --> 00:20:15,840 So Anne is basically a snarky millennial 483 00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:19,344 trapped in the body of a boomer. 484 00:20:19,469 --> 00:20:21,805 Well, they can't all be cults. 485 00:20:22,889 --> 00:20:24,599 What are you talking about? 486 00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:26,226 You heard what Father Joshua said. 487 00:20:26,351 --> 00:20:28,561 -They're just a farm of friends. -I'm sor-- 488 00:20:28,687 --> 00:20:31,231 -I know you don't believe that. -Where's your proof? 489 00:20:31,356 --> 00:20:33,775 -I couldn't get any proof. -Exactly. You couldn't get any-- 490 00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:36,111 Because any time I tried to ask a hard question, 491 00:20:36,236 --> 00:20:38,238 you got awkward and complimented a pumpkin. 492 00:20:38,363 --> 00:20:40,281 -They were legitimately huge. -Jesus Christ. 493 00:20:40,407 --> 00:20:42,367 And you're not gonna get anywhere from insulting people. 494 00:20:42,492 --> 00:20:44,077 Well, we didn't get anywhere anyway, did we? 495 00:20:44,202 --> 00:20:45,036 Well-- 496 00:20:47,622 --> 00:20:50,458 At least you can tell your neighbor her son is safe. 497 00:20:52,335 --> 00:20:55,422 They said he was selling zucchini in Canada? 498 00:20:55,547 --> 00:20:57,257 -Yeah. -[SCOFFS] 499 00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:59,467 Sounds like he's really rising through the ranks. It's great. 500 00:21:00,802 --> 00:21:02,053 I cannot tell if you're being serious. 501 00:21:02,178 --> 00:21:03,972 -[TIRE SQUEALS, RUMBLES] -Shit. 502 00:21:04,097 --> 00:21:05,015 What's that? 503 00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:07,058 Is there something stuck to the tire? 504 00:21:07,183 --> 00:21:09,769 Yeah. Probably a piece of gum. 505 00:21:13,064 --> 00:21:13,898 [GRUNTS] 506 00:21:19,404 --> 00:21:21,114 You sure you don't want to call AAA? 507 00:21:21,239 --> 00:21:22,157 I got it. 508 00:21:24,242 --> 00:21:27,203 Well, your skills are very impressive. 509 00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:32,792 I'm just saying, I have AAA Gold, 510 00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:35,003 -unlimited roadside assistance. -[GRUNTS] 511 00:21:35,128 --> 00:21:37,589 Hotel discounts, double points at Embassy Suites-- 512 00:21:37,714 --> 00:21:39,257 Okay, can you just let me do this? 513 00:21:39,382 --> 00:21:40,967 Sorry for trying to help. 514 00:21:41,092 --> 00:21:43,094 Are you trying to help or are you just sitting there? 515 00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:46,139 I'll help. Give me the steel thing. 516 00:21:46,264 --> 00:21:47,557 Do you know how to use one of these? 517 00:21:47,682 --> 00:21:48,641 I can learn. 518 00:21:48,767 --> 00:21:49,851 If there's reception. 519 00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:56,274 Steel...L-bar car. 520 00:21:58,485 --> 00:22:00,737 "You should use more water displacement 521 00:22:00,862 --> 00:22:02,906 four-zero penetrating oil." 522 00:22:03,031 --> 00:22:05,825 You mean WD-40? Mm-hmm. 523 00:22:05,950 --> 00:22:07,160 -No. -You know what? 524 00:22:07,285 --> 00:22:08,536 -I think I saw some down there. -Mm-hmm? 525 00:22:08,661 --> 00:22:09,788 With a bunch more reception. 526 00:22:09,913 --> 00:22:11,956 No. Are you--? Oh, real nice. 527 00:22:12,082 --> 00:22:13,416 You're gonna have to go get that. 528 00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:15,251 Are you kidding me? 529 00:22:15,377 --> 00:22:16,294 I-- Go and get the-- 530 00:22:16,419 --> 00:22:18,546 -Go and get the tire, Mare. -[SNIFFS] 531 00:22:18,672 --> 00:22:21,132 Mare, as your editor, I command you-- Goddamn it! 532 00:22:26,137 --> 00:22:28,890 [SIGHS] Watching him run is...tough. 533 00:22:32,686 --> 00:22:35,271 I hate these clothes! Is this the best look we have? 534 00:22:35,397 --> 00:22:36,690 -Yes! -Oh, no! 535 00:22:36,815 --> 00:22:37,774 -Yeah! -Really? 536 00:22:37,899 --> 00:22:40,110 -Yeah! -Oh, my God. 537 00:22:41,820 --> 00:22:42,821 Do you have the polo and the shorts? 538 00:22:42,946 --> 00:22:44,280 Shoot, I left them at the office. 539 00:22:44,406 --> 00:22:45,615 [SCREECHES] 540 00:22:45,740 --> 00:22:46,908 You said you wanted to look more rustic. 541 00:22:47,033 --> 00:22:49,119 In the heat of the moment, I said that. 542 00:22:49,244 --> 00:22:52,539 You have to push back on that. That's the job of an intern. 543 00:22:52,664 --> 00:22:54,290 We're on in five, guys. 544 00:22:54,416 --> 00:22:55,208 -Thanks. -Thank you. 545 00:22:56,459 --> 00:22:58,670 I'm dead. I'm gonna lose the lot. 546 00:22:58,795 --> 00:23:01,297 My respect, my visa, up in smoke. 547 00:23:01,423 --> 00:23:04,801 -You know what, Ken? You know-- -Go on. 548 00:23:05,885 --> 00:23:07,512 I'll do it. 549 00:23:07,637 --> 00:23:10,807 I'll-- I'll go ahead and do the interview for you. 550 00:23:10,932 --> 00:23:12,017 -Seriously? -Yeah. 551 00:23:12,142 --> 00:23:13,810 -You'll take the heat? -Sure. 552 00:23:13,935 --> 00:23:17,188 Do you know what? When I decided to pin all of the blame on you, 553 00:23:17,313 --> 00:23:19,399 that was completely at random. 554 00:23:19,524 --> 00:23:21,818 But now I see everything happens for a reason. 555 00:23:21,943 --> 00:23:23,778 -Yep. -Mm-hm. You good? 556 00:23:23,903 --> 00:23:25,739 Just...nervous. 557 00:23:25,864 --> 00:23:27,824 -Oh, I was nervous a minute ago. -Yeah. 558 00:23:27,949 --> 00:23:29,909 -Do you want a hat? -No, I'm okay. 559 00:23:30,035 --> 00:23:33,079 There we are. Look at that. "Just licky it." 560 00:23:33,204 --> 00:23:35,081 -Wish me luck. -I'm worried for you. 561 00:23:35,206 --> 00:23:36,666 Oh, yeah. 562 00:23:36,791 --> 00:23:38,710 Oy-oy. Good luck. 563 00:23:45,383 --> 00:23:46,926 We were trying to make a product 564 00:23:47,052 --> 00:23:49,179 to help men and kids stay clean. 565 00:23:49,304 --> 00:23:51,097 But we failed you, Toledo. 566 00:23:51,222 --> 00:23:52,515 And we hope you give us 567 00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:54,184 the chance to make it up to you. 568 00:23:54,309 --> 00:23:55,769 Thank you, Nicole Lee. 569 00:23:55,894 --> 00:23:57,771 And thank you, Toledo, 570 00:23:57,896 --> 00:23:59,439 for trusting us with your tushies. 571 00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:01,399 [CHUCKLES] 572 00:24:01,524 --> 00:24:04,402 Tushies. Great job, Nicole. 573 00:24:06,738 --> 00:24:09,491 Oh. Hey, guys. Marv's busy. 574 00:24:09,616 --> 00:24:10,784 He's watching TV. 575 00:24:10,909 --> 00:24:12,494 Actually, we're here to see you. 576 00:24:12,619 --> 00:24:15,163 Me? Oh, gosh, oh. Wish I'd worn my good brooch. 577 00:24:15,288 --> 00:24:16,164 What about? 578 00:24:16,289 --> 00:24:18,166 About this. 579 00:24:18,291 --> 00:24:20,794 Oh, okay. Well, let me take a look at what this is. 580 00:24:20,919 --> 00:24:23,046 How you doing there, Detrick? How-- How are your nieces? 581 00:24:23,171 --> 00:24:25,048 Oh, um, they're really good. 582 00:24:25,173 --> 00:24:26,383 Layla just started dancing. 583 00:24:26,508 --> 00:24:28,051 Now Allison, she's blowing glass-- 584 00:24:28,176 --> 00:24:29,052 Dedrick. 585 00:24:30,011 --> 00:24:31,596 just read the file, Anne. 586 00:24:31,721 --> 00:24:34,891 Or should I say, Gomudhens10? 587 00:24:35,016 --> 00:24:37,977 Yeah. Epic fail, Ann. 588 00:24:38,103 --> 00:24:40,772 Oh, my God. Who could write this awfulness? 589 00:24:40,897 --> 00:24:42,190 Who could write this? 590 00:24:42,315 --> 00:24:44,484 The world is a sick place, isn't it? 591 00:24:44,609 --> 00:24:47,070 -Isn't it, you poor kids? -Come on, Ann. 592 00:24:47,195 --> 00:24:49,197 -You wrote such awfulness. -No, Oscar. 593 00:24:49,322 --> 00:24:51,491 No, I swear to you, I had nothing to do with this. 594 00:24:51,616 --> 00:24:54,911 We traced your IP address. It's you. 595 00:24:55,036 --> 00:24:56,496 We know it's you. 596 00:24:56,621 --> 00:24:57,997 You know it's you, and you should be ashamed. 597 00:24:58,123 --> 00:24:59,708 Well, you don't gotta yell at her, dude. 598 00:24:59,833 --> 00:25:02,127 -Well, okay. -Oh, dear. 599 00:25:02,252 --> 00:25:04,004 Marv was right. Marv was right. 600 00:25:04,129 --> 00:25:06,172 He told me that I should set a password. 601 00:25:06,297 --> 00:25:08,008 And I always said, well, Marv, what for? 602 00:25:08,133 --> 00:25:10,468 I haven't had a secret since I was 30. Heh. 603 00:25:10,593 --> 00:25:14,222 And-- And he was-- He was right. 604 00:25:14,347 --> 00:25:16,683 I mean, I'm up and down from my desk all day long, 605 00:25:16,808 --> 00:25:18,018 running errands for Marv. 606 00:25:18,143 --> 00:25:19,811 And anybody could just sneak in here, 607 00:25:19,936 --> 00:25:22,480 and they could do whatever they wanted with my computer. 608 00:25:22,605 --> 00:25:25,525 -I mean, they could do porn. -Yeah. 609 00:25:25,650 --> 00:25:27,360 Oh, God. 610 00:25:27,485 --> 00:25:29,112 [VOICE CRACKING] They shouldn't even give these 611 00:25:29,237 --> 00:25:31,114 to old fools like me. 612 00:25:31,239 --> 00:25:32,615 -No. -You're not old. 613 00:25:32,741 --> 00:25:34,284 You're a little old, but-- 614 00:25:34,409 --> 00:25:36,536 Look, I didn't even think of that as a possibility, okay? 615 00:25:36,661 --> 00:25:38,580 And so maybe we should not have ambushed you. 616 00:25:38,705 --> 00:25:40,957 -Maybe we should have-- -We're really, really sorry. 617 00:25:41,082 --> 00:25:42,709 No, no, I am sorry. 618 00:25:42,834 --> 00:25:45,170 No, no, no. I feel partially responsible. 619 00:25:45,295 --> 00:25:47,797 We apologize to you, okay? 620 00:25:47,922 --> 00:25:51,092 And, uh, we apologize, and that's a beautiful brooch. 621 00:25:51,217 --> 00:25:52,969 -Yeah. Very beautiful. -He's my boss. 622 00:25:53,094 --> 00:25:55,972 -I feel terrible. -Don't beat yourself up. 623 00:25:56,097 --> 00:25:57,807 [VOICES OVERLAPPING] 624 00:25:57,932 --> 00:26:00,185 ANNE: I do think that whoever that troll is, 625 00:26:00,310 --> 00:26:02,312 that they just want to hold theTruth Teller 626 00:26:02,437 --> 00:26:04,564 to a high standard of quality, that's all. 627 00:26:04,689 --> 00:26:07,776 Marv invests a lot of money in that paper. 628 00:26:07,901 --> 00:26:11,488 So we've got to make sure that it's awesome sauce. 629 00:26:15,367 --> 00:26:18,119 -We're sharing? -No. 630 00:26:18,244 --> 00:26:19,621 -This is for you. -[SCOFFS] 631 00:26:19,746 --> 00:26:23,083 You earned a treat because of the tire change. 632 00:26:23,208 --> 00:26:25,043 Unfortunately, I didn't, because apparently 633 00:26:25,168 --> 00:26:26,461 -I messed up the interview. -Oh, my God... 634 00:26:26,586 --> 00:26:28,672 So there's just only one float, which is for you. 635 00:26:28,797 --> 00:26:31,800 I don't want you to watch me eat a float, you weird martyr. 636 00:26:31,925 --> 00:26:33,009 I didn't earn it. 637 00:26:35,428 --> 00:26:38,264 -Take a sip of the float. -I'm not drinking the float. 638 00:26:38,390 --> 00:26:40,308 Take a tiny little sip of the float. 639 00:26:40,433 --> 00:26:41,559 You take a sip of the float. 640 00:26:41,685 --> 00:26:42,769 It'd mean a lot to me if you take 641 00:26:42,894 --> 00:26:44,270 a tiny sip of the float. 642 00:26:44,396 --> 00:26:45,980 -I didn't earn it. -Have a sip of the float. 643 00:26:46,106 --> 00:26:48,650 -You have to earn a treat. -Put your tiny little lips 644 00:26:48,775 --> 00:26:51,861 around that straw and have a little bit of the float. 645 00:26:52,696 --> 00:26:54,114 No, thanks. 646 00:26:54,239 --> 00:26:55,990 Oh, my God. What is wrong with you today? 647 00:26:56,116 --> 00:26:58,243 Why are you needing to be Mr. Boss everywhere we go? 648 00:26:58,368 --> 00:27:01,121 I don't need to be Mr. Boss, okay? 649 00:27:01,246 --> 00:27:02,747 [GRUNTING] Because I amMr. Boss. 650 00:27:02,872 --> 00:27:03,707 -Jesus. -[WAITER CLEARS THROAT] 651 00:27:03,832 --> 00:27:05,625 -I'm so sorry. -Sorry. 652 00:27:05,750 --> 00:27:07,043 He actually can be as loud as he wants 653 00:27:07,168 --> 00:27:08,878 because he's Mr. Boss, so... 654 00:27:11,464 --> 00:27:14,467 Are you...ever gonna take me seriously as an editor. 655 00:27:14,592 --> 00:27:16,553 -[SCOFFS] -I-I-I'm not confused about 656 00:27:16,678 --> 00:27:19,139 how weird it is that I have this job, 657 00:27:19,264 --> 00:27:21,683 but I have it, so I'm not just gonna let you do 658 00:27:21,808 --> 00:27:24,310 whatever you want to do all the time. I'm sorry. 659 00:27:24,436 --> 00:27:26,271 -Because you don't trust me. -I do trust you. 660 00:27:26,396 --> 00:27:28,064 I made you editor when I resigned. 661 00:27:28,189 --> 00:27:29,816 Oh, my God, for two hours. 662 00:27:29,941 --> 00:27:31,985 It's very clear you think I'm dumber than you. 663 00:27:32,110 --> 00:27:33,361 I don't think you're dumber than me. 664 00:27:33,486 --> 00:27:34,404 Yes, you do. 665 00:27:34,529 --> 00:27:35,739 Oh, Mare, wow, you're so impressive 666 00:27:35,864 --> 00:27:36,990 with your manual labor. 667 00:27:37,115 --> 00:27:38,783 Oh! Oh, Ned, you're so hands-off. 668 00:27:38,908 --> 00:27:39,951 Wanna know what I think is dumb? 669 00:27:40,076 --> 00:27:41,327 -What? -A person who takes squash 670 00:27:41,453 --> 00:27:43,872 from a full-on Manson family. Okay? 671 00:27:43,997 --> 00:27:46,875 -We couldn't prove it. -They wore matching ponchos! 672 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:48,251 [SIGHS] 673 00:27:49,544 --> 00:27:51,546 Mare, could you give me the receipt, please? 674 00:27:51,671 --> 00:27:53,590 I don't want it to disappear in the recycling bin 675 00:27:53,715 --> 00:27:55,675 -you call a car. -Yeah, sorry, my car 676 00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:56,968 doesn't come with a maid. 677 00:27:57,093 --> 00:27:59,054 -Dick. -Hello? 678 00:28:01,514 --> 00:28:02,432 What? 679 00:28:04,100 --> 00:28:06,686 That's-- What nominations? 680 00:28:09,064 --> 00:28:12,025 Uh... Okay, no, wait. I'm gonna put you on speaker for Mare. 681 00:28:12,150 --> 00:28:13,735 -Say that again. -Hi. 682 00:28:13,860 --> 00:28:15,779 DETRICK: Oh, good. You didn't join the cult. 683 00:28:15,904 --> 00:28:18,239 Yeah, the nominations in the Ohio Journalism Awards 684 00:28:18,365 --> 00:28:20,533 came through. And Mare, you got nominated 685 00:28:20,658 --> 00:28:22,160 for the best short investigative piece 686 00:28:22,285 --> 00:28:24,329 for "Softees Clogs Toledo." 687 00:28:24,454 --> 00:28:25,789 -No. -Ned, there's more. 688 00:28:25,914 --> 00:28:27,290 The whole paper's up 689 00:28:27,415 --> 00:28:28,708 for overall excellence in journalism. 690 00:28:28,833 --> 00:28:30,585 The whole paper. So start writing a speech. 691 00:28:30,710 --> 00:28:32,379 -[GASPS] Um... -Don't forget to thank me. 692 00:28:32,504 --> 00:28:34,714 I-I won't. Thank you so much. Peace. 693 00:28:34,839 --> 00:28:38,510 -I mean, uh, bye. -Oh, my God, it's true. 694 00:28:38,635 --> 00:28:40,553 -Holy shit. -This is incredible. 695 00:28:40,679 --> 00:28:42,597 What's-- 696 00:28:42,722 --> 00:28:44,140 Oh, my God! 697 00:28:44,265 --> 00:28:47,560 -[LAUGHS] -[WHOOPING] 698 00:28:47,686 --> 00:28:48,645 Yes! 699 00:28:48,770 --> 00:28:51,314 [WHOOPING CONTINUES] 700 00:28:51,439 --> 00:28:53,441 [UPBEAT THEME PLAYING] 701 00:29:02,742 --> 00:29:04,160 [BARRY GROANING] 702 00:29:05,704 --> 00:29:06,996 [ESMERALDA SIGHS] 703 00:29:07,122 --> 00:29:11,209 You have been kissing on the 17th day of the month. 704 00:29:11,334 --> 00:29:14,671 I command you to forsake me. 705 00:29:14,796 --> 00:29:17,382 Set me free, set me free, set me free. 706 00:29:17,507 --> 00:29:18,675 [SIGHS] 707 00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:19,718 The spell is broken. 708 00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:21,636 [ESMERALDA SIGHS] 709 00:29:21,761 --> 00:29:22,679 Okay, fine. 710 00:29:27,308 --> 00:29:29,269 [UPBEAT THEME PLAYING] 711 00:29:29,319 --> 00:29:33,869 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 52432

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