Original subtitles

♪♪

[ Voice over ] HEY, I'M SADIE.

MY LIFE IS FILLED WITH ALL KINDS OF WEIRD CREATURES

FROM BEST FRIENDS TO IMPULSIVE BROTHERS.

SOMEHOW WE ALL FIT TOGETHER,

NATURALLY.

♪ IF I COULD CHOOSE A WORLD FOR ME ♪

♪ IT'D BE OPEN, BIG AND FREE ♪

♪ I'D PICK A PLACE NOT LIKE THE REST ♪

♪ NOT LIKE THE REST ♪

♪ IT'D BE BEST ♪ ♪ MY WORLD ♪

♪ MY SPACE, MY FRIENDS ♪

♪ I RUN TO YOU WHEN NO ONE'S THERE ♪

♪ NO ONE'S THERE ♪ ♪ AND OTHERS STARE ♪

♪ AND THERE WE'LL BE ♪

♪ NATURALLY ♪

Sadie: [ Voice over ] MALE BIRDS

GIVE THEIR MATES A HOME. SWEET, RIGHT?

BUT SOME LITTLE GUYS BUILD UP TO 12 NESTS

BEFORE A FEMALE IS HAPPY WITH THEIR GIFT.

I'M GETTING MINE RIGHT THE FIRST TIME.

YOU DO KNOW IT'S ONLY FRIDAY NIGHT.

THAT MEANS YOU HAVE UNTIL MONDAY MORNING

TO START YOUR HOMEWORK,

PRINCESS OF DORKNESS.

THIS ISN'T HOMEWORK, DOOFUS.

IT'S A DIORAMA OF OUR HOUSE

FOR MOM AND DAD'S 20th ANNIVERSARY GIFT.

LOOK!

HERE'S A TEENY-TINY VERSION OF DAD'S EXERCISE BIKE.

SHOULDN'T IT BE COVERED

IN TEENY-TINY VERSIONS OF MOM'S PANTY-HOSE?

Jean & Walter: HEY!

Jean: WE'RE OFF TO THE TENNIS COURTS,

THEN LA CUCINA FOR DINNER.

I WISH WE COULD GO TO BIG SOSA'S

LIKE OUR FIRST ANNIVERSARY.

THEIR MOZZARELLA.

MMM, STRINGIER THAN...

SADIE'S HAIR?

THAT IT WAS, THAT IT WAS...

HEY! PLAY NICE, YOU TWO.

THAT'S YOUR DAD, ALWAYS YEARNING FOR HIS YOUTH.

NEXT HE'LL SAY TENNIS CAN'T COMPETE WITH TENNIS-TRON.

OH!

THAT'S A VIDEO GAME.

FROM A FEW YEARS BACK. BIG SOSA HAD ONE.

[ Sarcastic laughter ]

TENNIS-TRON.

NOW, THAT'S A MAN'S GAME.

PIZZA AND TENNIS-TRON, MMM!

THE FIRST ANNIVERSARY ALL WOMEN DREAM OF.

OH, COME ON. I'LL LET YOU HAVE FIRST SERVE.

[ Closing of door ]

SO, WHAT'S YOUR GIFT?

PRETENDING TO LISTEN TO PIZZA AND TENNIS-TRON STORIES.

IT'S NOT MY ANNIVERSARY.

WHY SHOULD I GET THEM ANYTHING, ALL RIGHT?

BECAUSE THEY GAVE YOU THE SWEET GIFT OF LIFE?

LOOK, I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO,

JUST DON'T TRY AND HOG ANY OF THE CREDIT

WHEN THE BIG DAY ARRIVES.

RELAX, DIORAMA DING-DONG.

THE GLORY'S ALL YOURS.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

I... I'M FREAKING OUT.

MITSY'S HAD MY DESIGNS SINCE MONDAY

AND SHE HASN'T SAID ANYTHING.

DON'T WORRY. I'M SURE SHE'S GOING TO LOVE THEM.

AND WHAT ABOUT YOU? WOULD YOU EVER WEAR

A MARGARET BROWNING-LEVESQUE CREATION, MY LITTLE KUMQUAT, HMM?

I HOPE FOR TAYLOR'S SAKE

THAT ISN'T ONE OF YOUR MOVES

BECAUSE IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE DOING THE HEIMLICH.

PLEASE. THE RAINSTER'S GOT MOVES THAT YOU'VE NEVER SEEN.

[ Crashing ]

THAT'S WHY YOU'VE NEVER SEEN THEM.

Mitsy: LOVE YOU TOO, DOLL.

I'LL CALL YOU AFTER I SEE THE MAGAZINE PEOPLE.

UH, HI, MITSY.

UM, MY KIMONO DRESS IS FINISHED

SO, I... I WONDERED IF...

YOU COULD LOOK AT IT OR AT LEAST MY SKETCHES.

KEEP IT QUICK.

I'M LATE FOR MY MEETING WITH THE "16 CANDLES" PEOPLE.

OKAY, UM, IT'S JUST THAT I'D LOVE YOUR THOUGHTS.

YEAH...

SOMETHING HERE...

BUT NOT QUITE.

THIS SKETCH?

IT LOOKS LIKE THOSE SHINY, PULL-ON PANTS ELDERLY WOMEN WEAR.

MY YAYA LIVES IN THOSE THINGS.

RIGHT. THE 18- TO 25-YEAR-OLD SET DON'T.

BUT THEY WILL IN 60 YEARS.

IT'S A GOOD INVESTMENT.

I'M SORRY, HON, BUT YOU'RE REALLY GOING TO HAVE TO STEP IT UP.

AT THE END OF THE DAY, YOU'RE A MITSY MONROE INTERN,

SO THINK TRES CHIC,

NOT TRES GEEK.

I'LL SEE YOU SATURDAY.

OH, AND CAN YOU DO ME A TEENSY- WEENSY FAVOUR?

I NEED YOU TO SEAL AND STAMP

THESE 500 GALA INVITES FOR THE MAILING.

THANKS SO MUCH.

[ Chiming of elevator bell ]

YEAH, MITSY'S BUM DOES LOOK BIG IN THAT SKIRT.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

I'M IN. LET'S GIVE THE FOLKS

AN ANNIVERSARY THEY'LL NEVER FORGET.

I THOUGHT YOU DIDN'T SEE THE POINT.

THAT WAS THE OLD HAL.

NEW HAL WANTS A PIECE OF THE ACTION

SO HE DOESN'T LOOK BAD NEXT TO HIS KEEN SISTER.

NEW HAL'S CUNNING THAT WAY.

WELL, NEW HAL TALKS THE TALK.

BUT CAN HE GIFT THE GIFT?

YOU TELL ME.

"PARENTS' PARTYPALOOZA". HUH!

OKAY, SO THIS GUY COMES TO THE HOUSE

DRESSED IN A GORILLA SUIT, LIKE, ROAR!

SINGING HEAVY METAL, OBVIOUSLY.

WAIT, WAIT, OKAY, THERE COULD BE A LITTLE MONKEY

DRESSED AS A BELLBOY, LIKE...

YOU'RE RIGHT. IT'S BEEN DONE BEFORE.

UM, COULD BE A CLOWN...

I'M NOT REALLY DOWN WITH YOUR IDEAS, YOU KNOW?

YOU'RE A LITTLE OVER THE TOP.

WHAT I REALLY MEAN IS...

NEXT!

[ Buzz of buzzer ]

[ ♪♪♪ ]

...AND THE LITTLEST MONKEY

COULD BE, LIKE, JUGGLING CHEESE.

YOU KNOW, LIKE... YOU GET IT?

THAT'S GREAT, HAL, BUT MOM AND DAD

DON'T SHARE YOUR LOVE FOR ALL THINGS MONKEY AND CHEESE.

WELL THEY WOULD'VE IF THEY WERE MORE SUPPORTIVE.

MAYBE THEY DON'T DESERVE A PARTY AFTER ALL.

THEY DESERVE A GIFT THEY'D LIKE.

SO LET ME HELP. NO, HAL.

EVERY TIME I LET YOU HELP, YOU MESS UP AND RUIN EVERYTHING.

WHEN? WHEN HAVE I EVER MESSED UP?

OKAY, LET'S SEE.

THERE'S THE WATERSLIDE YOU BUILT ON THE STAIRCASE.

THE ICE SCULPTURE YOU HID IN YOUR CLOSET.

OR HOW ABOUT THE HOLE YOU DUG IN THE GARDEN

FOR THE LUAU THAT NEVER HAPPENED?

IN MY DEFENCE, THE WATERSLIDE

AND THE ICE SCULPTURE WERE DIRECTLY RELATED.

COME ON, SADIE. I CAN DO THIS.

ALL I NEED IS A LITTLE TRUST.

ALL RIGHT.

BUT JUST SO WE DON'T HAVE ANY MORE INCIDENTS,

HERE'S A RULE: I'M THE BRAINS, YOU'RE THE MUSCLES.

[ Smacks of kisses ]

SOMEBODY CALL A PLUMBER,

'CAUSE THESE PIPES ARE ABOUT TO BURST.

SO, WHAT DO YOU NEED FOR YOUR DIORAMA?

GLUE GUN? STINK BOMB?

AN EXACT 1 TO 1000 REPLICA OF OUR HOUSE?

SOME CELLOPHANE WOULD BE USEFUL.

WOW. ALL RIGHT, I SEE YOU'RE GOING OLD SCHOOL WITH THIS.

[ Chuckle ]

[ ♪♪♪ ]

THANKS FOR HELPING OUT.

OH, NO PROBLEM.

YOU KNOW ME, I LOVE THE TASTE OF PASTE.

HUH!

[ Speaking with lisp ] MITTHY DIDN'T HAVE TO BE THO MEAN.

YEAH. SHE WAS "THUPER NATHTY."

OKAY, SHE WAS TOTALLY OUT OF LINE.

LIKE THE TIME FRED RIPPED APART MY FIRST BAKLAVA.

HE WAS ALL BOTULISM THIS, AND LAWSUITS THAT.

THAT NIGHT, HE TOOK MY SOUL,

WRAPPED IT IN A PITA AND DROPPED IT DOWN A WELL.

MITSY PROBABLY JUST HAD A BAD DAY

SURROUNDED BY HUNGRY MODELS, AND TOOK IT OUT ON YOU.

YEAH, WELL, I HOPE SHE APPRETHIATES THITH.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

A FEW FINISHING TOUCHES...

PERFECT.

I'LL PUT THE CELLOPHANE OVER THESE WINDOWS,

AND THEN...

THEY DIDN'T HAVE ANY CELLOPHANE.

IS TOILET PAPER OKAY?

HAL! YOU DESTROYED IT!

OH. WAS THAT...

SOMETHING?

"SOMETHING"?

THAT'S OUR GIFT.

THAT WAS OUR GIFT.

I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN YOU'D DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS.

YOU RUINED IT. JUST... LEAVE.

HEY, MAYBE THIS COULD...?

NO. IT'S ONE-PLY.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

MAYBE IF I MADE THE SLEEVES LONGER.

OR SHORTENED THE SKIRT?

OH, I CAN SIGN FOR THAT.

YOU COULD MAKE A SOLID GOLD BREASTPLATE

AND MITSY STILL WOULDN'T LIKE IT.

THANKS.

LET'S FACE IT, THE LADY'S JUST HAVING AN OFF DAY.

THESE MUST BE THE MAGAZINE PROOFS FROM "16 CANDLES".

WITH MITSY'S DESIGNS.

THAT SHE WOULDN'T WANT US TO SEE.

'CAUSE SHE'S IN A TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE MOOD.

SO WE SHOULD JUST LEAVE THEM.

NO WAY! THE ONE THING I LOVE MORE THAN PASTE

IS SNOOPING.

Margaret: WAIT, THESE AREN'T MITSY'S.

THESE ARE MY DESIGNS!

THE KIMONO DRESS, THE SHINY LEGGINGS,

EVEN THE SATIN PONCHOS!

I'M IN "16 CANDLES"!

[ Squealing ]

YOU'RE A DESIGNER. YOU'RE IN THE MAGAZINE!

AND HOW COOL IS THIS?

MITSY PUT HER NAME ON A BUNCH OF DESIGNS THAT SHE HATES.

THAT WAY, YOU WON'T GET THE BLAME.

Margaret: I DON'T BELIEVE IT...

"ALL DESIGNS BY MITSY MONROE."

IF IMITATION IS THE SINCEREST FORM OF FLATTERY,

THEN MITSY MUST LOVE YOU.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

YOU'VE STILL GOT TIME TO GET THEM SOMETHING ELSE, RIGHT?

SURE, BUT NO IDEAS AND NO MONEY TO GET IT WITH.

I ACTUALLY REQUESTED A PLATE OF YAYA'S BAKLAVA FROM RAIN.

HEAR THAT, HAL?

20 YEARS OF MARRIAGE, AND THEY'RE GETTING AN OLD LADY'S DESSERT.

MAYBE YAYA CAN THROW IN A HAIR FROM HER MOLE.

I HEAR THEY'RE MAGIC.

LOOK, I REALLY WISH THERE WAS SOMETHING I COULD DO TO HELP.

YOU CAN SNEAK UP ON HER WITH SCISSORS.

HEY! WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS BEFORE?

BEN, YOU COULD TAKE A PORTRAIT OF HAL AND ME.

YEAH, SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN, RED.

OKAY, I'LL GET THE BAKLAVA.

AND, HAL, BE READY FOR THE PHOTO BY THE TIME I GET BACK.

OH, I'LL BE READY.

Man: OKAY, EVERYONE, SMILE ON THREE.

ONE, TWO, THREE.

[ Click of camera shutter ]

HAL, WE'RE NOT GIVING MOM AND DAD

"WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR DINNER?"

BEN'S TAKING OUR PORTRAIT SO... FIX YOURSELF UP.

A PORTRAIT? LAME.

SMASHING YOUR SISTER'S DIORAMA? LAMER.

DID I MENTION THAT I'M FREE?

CONSIDER THAT A GENERAL UN-LAMING.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

OKAY, SO THE DESIGNS MITSY TRASHED

ARE IN THE MAGAZINE?

IT COULD BE A SPECIAL ISSUE, YOU KNOW,

LIKE A "STUFF PEOPLE WOULDN'T BE CAUGHT DEAD IN" EDITION.

YEAH, OR IT COULD BE THE "MITSY MONROE

IS A COLD-HEARTED SHE-DEVIL" ISSUE.

DID I MENTION RAIN THINKS SHE STOLE MY DESIGNS?

BUT MITSY'S ALWAYS BEEN SO GOOD TO YOU,

IT SOUNDS LIKE SOME KIND OF MISTAKE.

PFFFT.

IN THEORY.

YOU SHOULD TALK TO HER.

I'LL ASK HER AND GET IT ALL SORTED OUT, THANKS.

OH, AND GOOD LUCK WITH EVERYTHING.

YEAH, YOU TOO. OKAY.

OOH! KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR THE MOLE HAIR.

MARGARET.

I TALKED TO MY DAD ABOUT THE CRIME OF THE CENTURY.

HE'S A COP SO HE CAN CLOSE MITSY MONROE'S SWEATSHOP ASAP.

YOU'RE IN GOOD HANDS.

SILENT, SCARY, STALKING HANDS.

BUT GOOD ONES!

WE DON'T EVEN KNOW IF MITSY DID ANYTHING WRONG.

LET ME HANDLE THIS.

LET'S NOT GET ALL SWAT TEAM JUST YET.

ALL RIGHT, BUT THE SECOND YOU NEED

THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW, MY DAD'S IN.

ANY CHANCE OFFICER DIDOMENICANTONIO'S LONG ARM

COULD SHRINK AWAY FROM ME?

EVEN A LITTLE?

SORRY, DADDY DON'T ROLL THAT WAY.

OH, HON, IT WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING.

NOT MINE, OF COURSE.

"16 CANDLES" GOT OUR NAMES MIXED UP.

IT WAS SOME CARELESS EDITOR MISTAKE.

BUT YOUR... YOUR NAME'S NEXT TO A BUNCH OF DESIGNS YOU HATE.

AT THE END OF THE DAY, LET'S HOPE THE READERS

DON'T DISLIKE THEM AS MUCH AS I DID, HMM?

YOU COULD JUST TELL THE EDITOR THE CLOTHES ARE MINE.

OH, NO, SWEETIE.

I COULDN'T TELL THEM MY APPRENTICE DID THOSE DESIGNS.

HOW WOULD THAT LOOK?

ACCURATE.

WHAT WAS THAT?

I... I GUESS IT WOULD LOOK BAD.

LET ME MAKE IT UP TO YOU.

HOW ABOUT AN APPRENTICESHIP WITH VICTOR LAFEMME?

YOU WOULD BE IN HIS PARIS STUDIO

DESIGNING YOUR LITTLE HEART OUT.

I COULD MAKE IT HAPPEN.

HOW DOES THAT SOUND?

PRETTY MUCH PERFECT!

[ ♪♪♪ ]

OKAY, I'M READY TO CAPTURE THE MOMENT.

GREAT! ALL WE NEED IS...

Sadie: HAL!

DID YOU EAT THE GIFT?

NO, NO, NO, NO, YOU'RE ALLERGIC TO WALNUTS.

YOU KNOW THAT.

SO, HOW DO I LOOK?

AH!

UNLESS IT'S FOR A MEDICAL JOURNAL,

NOT PICTURE-PERFECT.

WHAT? TOO MUCH GEL?

TOO MUCH GROSS. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

YOU'RE A BLOWFISH. LOOK AT YOURSELF!

YOU CAN'T EAT WALNUTS.

DUDE. CHECK IT.

AAH! UGH! WALNUTS?

I ALWAYS THINK IT'S DOUGHNUTS.

IT'LL GO DOWN IN, LIKE, AN HOUR.

MAYBE WE CAN USE A SPECIAL LENS OR SOMETHING.

THERE ISN'T A LENS IN THE WORLD

THAT COULD MAKE YOU LOOK LESS HIDEOUS.

I'VE REALLY GOT TO SPLIT.

DON'T LEAVE ME WITH BLOWFISH BOY.

I WANT TO HELP I-IN ANY WAY THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE TOUCHING HAL'S FACE,

LOOKING AT HIM, OR EVEN BEING IN THE SAME ROOM.

[ Nervous laugh ] CHIMO.

HAL, YOU COME UP WITH RIDICULOUS IDEAS

AND WHENEVER I TRY TO DO ANYTHING GOOD,

YOU RUIN IT.

IT'S LIKE YOU HAVE SOME KIND OF...

ANIMAL INSTINCT FOR SABOTAGE.

DON'T YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY?

I WISH THERE WAS MORE BAKLAVA?

[ ♪♪♪ ]

SEE, SADIE WAS RIGHT.

IT WAS JUST SOME WEIRD MISUNDERSTANDING.

FRED THINKING DEODORANT IS OPTIONAL?

THAT'S A MISUNDERSTANDING.

MITSY RIPPING YOU OFF, THEN BRIBING YOU?

THAT IS GRAND THEFT, FASHION.

[ Sigh ] WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?

I'VE GOT A PLAN.

IT'S CRAZY ENOUGH IT JUST MIGHT WORK.

TRUST ME, WE'LL GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS.

RAIN, FOR ONCE, DON'T GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS.

FINE. THEN I'M STAYING ON TOP OF THIS.

NO, RAIN. WHAT YOU'RE DOING

IS GETTING IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS.

MARGARET, HIS PLAN IS SOLID.

RAINBOW REHEARSED IT WITH ME,

AND I CONFESSED TO STEALING YOUR DESIGNS.

GUYS, I'D RATHER NOT PURSUE IT.

WE MAY ALREADY BE IN TOO DEEP.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

[ ♪♪♪ ]

DO YOU THINK MY PARENTS COULD USE $2 OFF CARPET SHAMPOOING?

SURE. YOU WANT ME TO DROP THIS?

UH, THANKS BUT NO THANKS.

[ Heavy sigh ]

I WORK MY BUTT OFF, AND THEN SOME BIG OAF WRECKS MY GIFT.

I WORK MY BUTT OFF, AND SOME BIG DESIGNER GETS ALL THE CREDIT.

SURE, I COULD MAKE ANOTHER GIFT USING ONLY TOILET PAPER

BUT WHAT IF ANOTHER ACCIDENT RUINS THAT TOO?

SURE, I COULD WORK IN PARIS IF I KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT.

BUT WHAT IF ANOTHER MISUNDERSTANDING HAPPENS?

YOU COULD CHEER YOURSELF UP WITH

A HALF-PRICE SUNDAE AT THE WHITBY CREAMERY.

I BET, DEEP DOWN,

MITSY'S THREATENED BY YOU.

SHE JUST DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT.

AND I BET DEEP DOWN, HAL MEANS WELL. HE JUST...

DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO SHOW IT.

Sadie: [ Voice over ] MARGARET WAS RIGHT.

HAL GOOFED UP, BUT HIS HEART WAS IN THE RIGHT PLACE.

I HAD TO TELL HIM I KNEW THAT.

UH, BUT I'M STILL RIGHT THAT HE'S AN OAF.

CARPET CLEANING IT IS, THEN.

A FOUR-PAGE SPREAD IN "16 CANDLES"?

YOU REALLY ARE THE BEST PUBLICIST.

[ Whispering ] SORRY.

Mitsy: YES, THE DESIGNS ARE REALLY DIFFERENT FROM MY USUAL LOOK.

I MEAN, I COULD'VE DONE SOMETHING THAT DIFFERENT LAST YEAR,

I JUST... CAN YOU HOLD ON A MINUTE?

DO YOU MIND?

UH... UH, MADEMOISELLE,

NE... NE PAS D'ANGLAIS.

NON, NON, NON, NON, NON.

VOUS ETES FRANCAIS. MOI AUSSI.

UH, OUI, U,

JE M'APPELLE, UH, JEAN-JACQUES.

LE MAISON, C'EST FROMAGE?

ET LE LAIT SONT CHOCOLAT... PER QUE...

ESPANOL?

SORRY.

[ Sigh ] OKAY, CAN I SHARE?

DESIGNER TO PUBLICIST?

THE DESIGNS AREN'T TECHNICALLY MINE.

THE MAGAZINE HAD AN INSANE DEADLINE,

SO I HAD TO SUBMIT MY TEENAGE INTERN'S WORK.

I KNOW, I'M SO BAD!

BUSTED.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

I'M ALMOST DONE. JUST 15 MINUTES

AND 8 MORE TUBES OF GLUE.

TEN TUBES.

LOOK, HAL.... YOU WERE RIGHT.

I DO RUIN EVERYTHING.

HEY, THAT'S NOT TRUE.

YOU DO LOTS OF NICE THINGS.

YOU CHEER PEOPLE UP, AND YOU LISTEN,

AND YOU MAKE FUNNY NOISES WITH YOUR BELLY BUTTON.

SADIE, PLEASE.

I DON'T NEED YOUR LITTLE SISTER INTERVENTION, OKAY?

HEY, WHY DON'T WE JUST TAKE MOM AND DAD OUT TO DINNER?

AT THE WOW. I HAVE A COUPON.

NO, THANKS.

COME ON.

YOU KNOW THEY'LL WANT YOU THERE.

NO, I DON'T KNOW THAT.

I DO KNOW THAT I'M THE SLACKER,

I'M THE DISAPPOINTMENT, THE... THE BASSOON.

BUFFOON.

NO! NO, YOU'RE NOT.

SADIE, YOUR ORIGINAL PLAN

WAS TO DO THIS WHOLE SHINDIG SOLO, RIGHT?

SO JUST STICK WITH THAT.

THAT WAY, I CAN'T DO ANY MORE DAMAGE.

ALL RIGHT?

UGH...

[ ♪♪♪ ]

BUT MAYBE SHE'LL REVEAL THE DESIGNS ARE MINE.

LIKE, IN AN UPCOMING ISSUE OF THE MAGAZINE?

MARGARET, SHE BRAGGED THAT SHE GOT AWAY WITH IT.

SHE SAID, "I'M SO BAD!"

THEN GIGGLED LIKE A SPOILED BRAT ON CHRISTMAS DAY

WHO GOT GIFTS INSTEAD OF THE STEAMING LUMP OF COAL SHE DESERVES!

OKAY, RAIN, I GET IT.

BUT... I COULD WORK IN PARIS

IF I DROP THE WHOLE THING.

[ Deep breath ]

KEEP QUIET, HAVE A CAREER.

SPEAK UP, STAY A NO-NAME.

I HAVE A FEELING THAT BETWEEN YOU AND MITSY,

SHE'S GOING TO END UP THE NO-NAME.

EXCEPT SHE'S ALREADY A YES-NAME. SO...

I'M NOT GOING TO DO IT.

MARGARET BROWNING-LEVESQUE.

WHY DID YOU CREATE A KIMONO DRESS

THAT ONLY A JAPANESE GEISHA

OR A SIZE ZERO MODEL COULD WEAR?

UM... WELL, I...

BECAUSE YOU, MISSY, ARE A DESIGNER.

WITH VISION AND TALENT AND FLAIR,

SO YOU BETTER NOT LET SOME TWO-BIT, HAS-BEEN

MEANIE MONROE STEAL YOUR STUFF!

NOW, GET A BACKBONE, GRAB THAT SKETCH PAD,

AND GET OUT THERE!

I ADORE YOU.

WE WILL KISS LATER.

THIS IS ABOUT MARGARET RIGHT NOW.

NOW, GO, GO, GO!

OKAY.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

THIS IS SO SWEET, HONEY.

YOU REALLY WENT THROUGH A LOT OF TROUBLE.

WE'RE THRILLED.

IT'S A SHAME YOUR BROTHER WASN'T UP TO COMING.

OH, YOU KNOW HAL.

SUNDAY NIGHT, TIME TO START THINKING ABOUT HOMEWORK.

GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN

AND WELCOME TO THE ROMANCE ROOM.

I HEAR WE HAVE AN ANNIVERSARY TONIGHT.

MOM, DAD?

BEN WILL BE TONIGHT'S...

ENTERTAINMENT.

IT'S THE LEAST I COULD DO.

ONE, TWO.

♪ YEAH, WALTER MET A LADY ♪

♪ HER NAME WAS JEAN ♪

♪ SHE WAS OH, SO LOVELY ♪

♪ BUT A LITTLE BIT MEAN ♪

♪ SHE PLOTTED AND PLANNED BECAUSE WALTER WAS FINE ♪

♪ HE WAS TALL HE WAS DARK ♪

♪ SHE SAID, "AH! I'LL MAKE HIM MINE!" ♪

YEAH! THAT SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT.

Sadie: UH, BEN?

THAT'LL DO, THANKS.

WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

I'LL BE HERE ALL NIGHT.

TRY THE SOFFRITTO.

I SURE WISH HAL WAS HERE.

YEAH, THAT BOY.

WALKING DISASTER SOMETIMES, ISN'T HE?

I MISS HIM.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

♪ FOOD FIGHT ♪

HE-EY!

IT'S MORNING BREATH!

"FOOD FIGHT!"

REMEMBER HAL'S SHOWCASE HERE?

GRAND PLANS THAT CRASHED AND BURNED.

HE TRIES SO HARD, THOUGH, DOESN'T HE?

REMEMBER WHEN HE WAS FIVE AND HE TRIED TO GROW A PIZZA TREE?

ACTUALLY, IT WAS 15.

HOW ABOUT THAT TIME HE SOLD GUM, DOOR TO DOOR?

OF COURSE IT WAS CHEWED.

[ Laughing ]

Sadie: [ Voice over ] YUP, A PERFECT ANNIVERSARY.

ALL THAT'S MISSING WAS HAL.

♪ YOU BETTER GET READY ♪

THAT'S WHEN IT HIT ME.

NOBODY MISSED HAL BECAUSE OF HIS POLITE MANNERS OR NICE GIFTS.

WE MISSED HIS CRAZINESS,

HIS BUFFOONERY, HIS COMPLETE, UTTER HAL-NESS.

THAT WAS HIS PLACE IN OUR FAMILY.

AND THE FIT WAS PERFECT.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

HEY, DO YOU GUYS WANT TO HEAD HOME?

MAYBE ORDER IN?

WE COULD SEE HAL AT HOME!

SURE, LET'S GO BEFORE BEN TRIES TO SING AGAIN.

[ Laughing ]

NO, HEY, WAIT. I GOT MORE!

[ Dissonant ♪♪♪ ]

WELL, SO MUCH FOR MY ENCORE.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

WE NEED TO TALK, MITSY.

YOU BET WE DO.

VICTOR LAFEMME SAID HE SHOULD HAVE AN OPENING FOR YOU NEXT YEAR.

WOW, THAT'S AMAZING.

SEE HOW THESE THINGS WORK?

IT'S ALL ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS.

NOW, CAN YOU ARCHIVE THESE FOR ME?

[ ♪♪♪ ]

[ Whispering ] YOU, MISSY, ARE A DESIGNER.

GET A BACKBONE.

MAYBE VICTOR WILL LET ME SUBMIT DESIGNS TO "16 CANDLES"...

UNDER MY OWN NAME.

LISTEN, HON, IF YOU SUBMIT STUFF NOW,

IT'LL LOOK LIKE YOU STOLE FROM ME.

AND NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND?

YOU'RE SO YOUNG AND NAIVE.

AT THE END OF THE DAY, WE ALL PAY TRIBUTE,

BORROW, RIFF, WHATEVER YOU CALL IT.

YOU'LL DO THE SAME.

NO, I WON'T.

BECAUSE "AT THE END OF THE DAY," I CALL IT STEALING.

I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE RIPPED OFF

AND I WILL NEVER DO IT TO ANYONE.

YOU CAN KISS PARIS GOODBYE.

FOR NOW.

BUT YOU WATCH,

I'LL GET THERE ON MY OWN SOMEDAY.

I THINK NOT.

I'LL TELL EVERYONE THAT YOU HAVE NO TALENT.

AND NOBODY WILL BELIEVE YOUR LITTLE STORY

BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO REPUTATION,

NO POWER, NO PROOF.

JE M'APPELLE RAI,

AND MY ENGLISH IS PRETTY GOOD.

WITHIN REASON.

LADY, YOU JUST WENT OUT OF STYLE.

"OUT OF STYLE", GET IT?

YOU KNOW, EVEN IF I DIDN'T HAVE REPUTATION,

POWER OR PROOF,

I'VE GOT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING OF ALL.

FRIENDS WHO BELIEVE IN ME.

AND THAT'S ALL I NEED.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

OH, AND BY THE WAY?

YOUR DESK IS FILTHY.

[ ♪♪♪ ]

♪ IF THEY WON'T STOP TALK-TALK-TALKING ♪

♪ HIT THEM WITH SOUVLAKI ♪

[ Laughing ]

WHOA!

DO I SMELL WHAT I THINK I SMELL?

IT'S THE GLORIOUS, PUNGENT AROMA OF BIG SOSA'S PIZZA!

[ Electronic beeps ]

THAT SOUNDS LIKE TENNIS-TRON.

BUT HOW?

I TRACKED DOWN THAT SOSA DUDE.

HIS SECRET SUPER-GREASY CHEESE RECIPE?

HOW DID YOU PULL IT OFF?

HEY, GETTING THE RECIPE WAS THE EASY PART.

THE CATCH WAS I HAD TO TAKE THE TENNIS-TRON.

IT WAS SITTING IN HIS BASEMENT FOR YEARS.

HE EVEN SHIPPED IT OVER HERE.

HAL, HOW DID YOU COME UP WITH SUCH A SURPRISE?

IT'S WONDERFUL.

WELL, IT WAS ALL SADIE'S IDEA.

SHE JUST WANTED EVERYTHING TO BE PERFECT.

SO I... RAN WITH IT.

ACTUALLY, WE WORKED ON IT TOGETHER.

COME ON, HONEY, LET'S PLAY SOME TENNIS-TRON.

HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT WOULD BE THE PERFECT GIFT?

I HEARD THEM TALKING ABOUT IT THE OTHER NIGHT.

AND YOU WERE PROBABLY TOO DEEP IN DIORAMA TO HEAR THEM.

Walter: WHOO, YEAH!

Sadie: [ Voice over ] THAT'S THE THING ABOUT MY BIG BROTHER.

HE'S KIND OF LIKE THE LITTLE BIRD

THAT HAS TO TRY OVER AND OVER TO GET SOMETHING RIGHT.

IT MAY TAKE HIM A BIT LONGER,

BUT WHEN HE GETS IT...

SAY, HAL?

HOW DID YOU GET THE TENNIS-TRON GAME INSIDE?

♪ EVERYBODY'S CRAZY NOW ♪

UH...

♪ YEAH YEAH EVERYBODY'S... ♪

Sadie: [ Voice over ] ...HE REALLY GETS IT.

♪ YEAH YEAH ♪

HAL!

Walter: COME ON. LET'S PLAY.

♪ ...IS GET BY ♪

♪ IN MY MIND ♪

[ ♪♪♪ ]