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1
00:00:02,569 --> 00:00:05,137
[theme music]
2
00:00:05,138 --> 00:00:06,071
[door slams]
3
00:00:06,072 --> 00:00:07,406
- Hey Mom, Dad.
4
00:00:07,407 --> 00:00:08,941
- Young man, where have you been?
5
00:00:08,942 --> 00:00:11,877
- Over helping Mr. Wilson
with a crossword puzzle.
6
00:00:11,878 --> 00:00:12,811
And you know something?
7
00:00:12,812 --> 00:00:14,380
He thinks I'm pretty smart.
8
00:00:14,381 --> 00:00:16,048
- He does, does he?
- Yeah.
9
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:19,385
He just said if he had his way,
I'd be going away to college
10
00:00:19,386 --> 00:00:21,553
next year.
11
00:00:21,554 --> 00:00:41,641
{\an8}[theme music]
12
00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:57,790
- If you were allergic to
foods, pollens, or dusts John,
13
00:00:57,791 --> 00:01:01,326
that test would've produced
red patches on your arm by now.
14
00:01:01,327 --> 00:01:03,128
- Well I must be
allergic to something.
15
00:01:03,129 --> 00:01:07,466
- But at times John's eyes water
so we can hardly work doctor.
16
00:01:07,467 --> 00:01:08,901
- Hmm.
17
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:11,203
Maybe you're allergic
to work John.
18
00:01:11,204 --> 00:01:12,738
[laughs]
19
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,606
- Very funny.
20
00:01:14,607 --> 00:01:16,709
And what am I supposed
to do the next time
21
00:01:16,710 --> 00:01:18,610
I start sneezing my head off?
22
00:01:18,611 --> 00:01:21,246
Those quack pills you gave
me didn't do any good.
23
00:01:21,247 --> 00:01:23,682
- Well the next time you
start sneezing be sure
24
00:01:23,683 --> 00:01:25,284
and called me up.
25
00:01:25,285 --> 00:01:26,819
- Call you?
26
00:01:26,820 --> 00:01:28,821
Whatever for?
27
00:01:28,822 --> 00:01:31,156
- So I can come over and
watch you be miserable.
28
00:01:31,157 --> 00:01:32,858
[laughs]
29
00:01:32,859 --> 00:01:33,692
- Bye Eloise.
30
00:01:33,693 --> 00:01:34,426
- Bye
31
00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:37,463
- Ugh, some doctor.
32
00:01:37,464 --> 00:01:39,631
I could be dying
and all he'd give
33
00:01:39,632 --> 00:01:42,968
me are bum jokes and
those quack pill.
34
00:01:42,969 --> 00:01:45,137
[door bell rings]
35
00:01:45,138 --> 00:01:46,972
- Now who could that be?
36
00:01:46,973 --> 00:01:49,708
- Well now that's
a silly question.
37
00:01:49,709 --> 00:01:51,944
Who else comes over to
bother me every time
38
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,913
I'm about to start an article?
39
00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:01,253
- Hi Mrs. Wilson.
40
00:02:01,254 --> 00:02:02,254
- Hello dear.
41
00:02:02,255 --> 00:02:03,455
- Mom asked me to return this.
42
00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:04,524
- Oh thank you dear.
43
00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:08,962
- Morning Mr. Wilson.
44
00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:10,662
You working?
45
00:02:10,663 --> 00:02:11,764
- No Dennis.
46
00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:15,067
I'm sitting here staring
at my typewriter.
47
00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:16,368
- What's this one about?
48
00:02:16,369 --> 00:02:19,104
- This is called What We
Know About The Planets.
49
00:02:19,105 --> 00:02:20,906
And it has to be in by Friday.
50
00:02:20,907 --> 00:02:22,875
So if you'll excuse me.
51
00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:25,077
- Boy, planets should
make a swell article.
52
00:02:25,078 --> 00:02:27,913
Do you know much about
planets Mr. Wilson?
53
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:33,085
- Only that the one that I am on
is a little too small at times.
54
00:02:33,086 --> 00:02:35,587
Now if you'll-- if you'll--
55
00:02:35,588 --> 00:02:37,089
[sneeze]
56
00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:39,224
- Bless you Mr. Wilson.
57
00:02:39,225 --> 00:02:40,426
You got hay fever?
58
00:02:40,427 --> 00:02:42,661
You sneeze every time
I come over lately.
59
00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:46,098
- Dennis will you--
what did you say?
60
00:02:46,099 --> 00:02:48,567
- I said you sneeze every
time I come over lately.
61
00:02:48,568 --> 00:02:51,971
- Eloise!
62
00:02:55,642 --> 00:02:57,543
- Allergic to Dennis?
63
00:02:57,544 --> 00:02:59,611
That's not possible.
64
00:02:59,612 --> 00:03:02,047
- No it doesn't
seem possible John.
65
00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:03,749
- Well according to
Doctor Johnson, Henry,
66
00:03:03,750 --> 00:03:04,883
who I just talked to.
67
00:03:04,884 --> 00:03:07,786
Although admittedly
rare, there are
68
00:03:07,787 --> 00:03:13,826
cases on file of one human
being allergic to another.
69
00:03:13,827 --> 00:03:16,428
- I'm completely flabbergasted.
70
00:03:16,429 --> 00:03:18,230
- Well, not that I
doubt your word John,
71
00:03:18,231 --> 00:03:21,367
but this is something I've
got to see with my own eyes.
72
00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,202
[sigh]
73
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,704
- You mean you can make
Mr. Wilson sneeze just
74
00:03:25,705 --> 00:03:27,406
by being around him?
75
00:03:27,407 --> 00:03:29,074
- Not even tickling his nose?
76
00:03:29,075 --> 00:03:30,676
- Or using sneezing powder?
77
00:03:30,677 --> 00:03:32,077
- That's right.
78
00:03:32,078 --> 00:03:35,714
Every time I go over there
lately he sneezes like crazy.
79
00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,116
- Ah, go on Dennis.
80
00:03:37,117 --> 00:03:40,486
- We weren't born
yesterday you know.
81
00:03:40,487 --> 00:03:44,690
- All right, wise guys, we'll
go next door and I'll show ya.
82
00:03:44,691 --> 00:03:46,091
- Dennis.
83
00:03:46,092 --> 00:03:48,193
Come in the house a
minute, will you son?
84
00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:49,194
- I'll be right out.
85
00:03:49,195 --> 00:03:52,097
I hope.
86
00:03:52,098 --> 00:03:54,933
If it's about my frog
Sammy using your bath water
87
00:03:54,934 --> 00:03:58,103
dad-- oh hi Mr. Wilson.
88
00:03:58,104 --> 00:03:59,738
Hey guys, come
around to the window
89
00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:01,573
if you wanna see something.
90
00:04:01,574 --> 00:04:02,541
- Dennis.
91
00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:03,776
- Hey Mom, did Mr.
Wilson tell you
92
00:04:03,777 --> 00:04:05,678
about the crazy way
I made him sneeze?
93
00:04:05,679 --> 00:04:07,646
- Yes dear, he certainly did.
94
00:04:07,647 --> 00:04:11,617
- Yes Dennis, that's
precisely why I'm he--
95
00:04:11,618 --> 00:04:13,052
[sneeze]
96
00:04:13,053 --> 00:04:14,653
- Bless you Mr. Wilson.
97
00:04:14,654 --> 00:04:16,088
- Oh Dennis, never mind.
98
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:18,057
- Did you see that guys?
99
00:04:18,058 --> 00:04:19,425
- I just heard it.
100
00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:22,194
- Make him do it again Dennis.
- All right, fellas.
101
00:04:22,195 --> 00:04:23,495
The show is over.
102
00:04:23,496 --> 00:04:24,531
[sneeze]
103
00:04:27,133 --> 00:04:31,136
- Dennis wait out
in the hall dear.
104
00:04:31,137 --> 00:04:33,072
- I never would have believed it.
105
00:04:33,073 --> 00:04:34,073
- Wait a minute.
106
00:04:34,074 --> 00:04:35,140
Mr. Wilson, do you
think it could it
107
00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:37,843
be something Dennis is wearing?
108
00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:39,845
- Maybe a soap he's using.
109
00:04:39,846 --> 00:04:41,547
- Harry that's it!
110
00:04:41,548 --> 00:04:43,916
I just changed Dennis's
soap last week,
111
00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:46,552
the one that's supposed to get
dirt off little boys easier.
112
00:04:46,553 --> 00:04:50,155
- Well I suppose I could
be allergic to soap.
113
00:04:50,156 --> 00:04:51,490
- You see what happens
when you worry
114
00:04:51,491 --> 00:04:54,159
about me being
clean all the time?
115
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:57,597
- Well you'll just have to take
a bath and use the old soap.
116
00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:03,335
- Well I sure wish I could make
somebody sneeze like that.
117
00:05:03,336 --> 00:05:04,169
- Me too.
118
00:05:04,170 --> 00:05:06,071
- Hey guys I gotta take a bath.
119
00:05:06,072 --> 00:05:06,940
- A bath?
120
00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:08,674
- In the middle of the day?
121
00:05:08,675 --> 00:05:09,875
- Yeah.
122
00:05:09,876 --> 00:05:12,044
My folks think Mr. Wilson
is sneezing around me
123
00:05:12,045 --> 00:05:14,380
because of some dumb
old soap I'm using.
124
00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:16,115
- You mean you're going to
take an extra bath just
125
00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:18,050
on account of Mr. Wilson?
126
00:05:18,051 --> 00:05:19,084
- Sure Tommy.
127
00:05:19,085 --> 00:05:20,753
Mr. Wilson's a good
friend of mine.
128
00:05:20,754 --> 00:05:22,488
See ya later.
129
00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:25,891
- Boy, who needs a
friend like that?
130
00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:27,493
- It's bad enough when
you get older and have
131
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:28,794
to be clean all the time.
132
00:05:28,795 --> 00:05:30,196
- I'll never be that old.
133
00:05:34,601 --> 00:05:36,468
- How's the great
experiment coming along?
134
00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:38,303
- He's combing his hair.
135
00:05:38,304 --> 00:05:40,706
I had him put on all
clean cotton clothing
136
00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:44,443
just in case Mr. Wilson's
allergic to synthetics.
137
00:05:44,444 --> 00:05:47,546
- Honey, you don't think this
is an insidious plot hatched up
138
00:05:47,547 --> 00:05:52,584
by John Wilson to keep Dennis
from bothering him, do you?
139
00:05:52,585 --> 00:05:53,386
Just a thought.
140
00:05:56,856 --> 00:05:59,158
- I'm all set Mom.
141
00:05:59,159 --> 00:06:04,296
- Well off you go to do battle
with Mr. Wilson's nose.
142
00:06:04,297 --> 00:06:07,900
- Boy, if I were any
cleaner I'd feel sick.
143
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:10,235
- It is kind of a shock to
the nervous system, isn't it?
144
00:06:10,236 --> 00:06:11,171
- Sure is.
145
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:15,741
- Well Eloise, in
a few minutes I'll
146
00:06:15,742 --> 00:06:17,910
know whether I've
gotten that pint size
147
00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:19,812
nuisance out of
my hair for good.
148
00:06:19,813 --> 00:06:22,748
- Oh John, you like
Dennis and you know it.
149
00:06:22,749 --> 00:06:24,616
- I like kangaroos too.
150
00:06:24,617 --> 00:06:26,151
But I don't want
them hopping around
151
00:06:26,152 --> 00:06:28,053
when I'm trying to write.
152
00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:30,789
Besides, they
don't ask question.
153
00:06:30,790 --> 00:06:32,391
[door bell rings]
154
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,660
- Come in, Dennis.
155
00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:36,095
- Hi Mrs. Wilson.
156
00:06:36,096 --> 00:06:37,730
- Hello dear.
157
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:39,732
- You ready to smell
me Mr. Wilson?
158
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:42,101
- My, don't you look nice.
159
00:06:42,102 --> 00:06:45,738
- Oh boy, you're not
sneezing Mr. Wilson.
160
00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:47,841
- Oh give me time
Dennis, give me time.
161
00:06:53,279 --> 00:06:55,982
Well Eloise, I guess I'm not--
162
00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:58,283
[sneeze]
163
00:06:58,284 --> 00:07:01,186
- Maybe it was one left over.
164
00:07:01,187 --> 00:07:02,589
[sneeze]
165
00:07:06,026 --> 00:07:07,359
- Jeepers Mr. Wilson.
166
00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,929
What can we do now?
167
00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:13,032
- Little friend, there's
only one thing we can do.
168
00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:13,832
We--
169
00:07:13,833 --> 00:07:17,036
[sneeze]
170
00:07:17,037 --> 00:07:20,673
- Stay away from each other for
the rest of our natural life.
171
00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:23,676
- You mean we can't
be pals anymore?
172
00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:26,045
- Oh, yes of course
we can Dennis.
173
00:07:26,046 --> 00:07:27,380
Uh, a pen pal.
174
00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:37,056
- How's it coming dear?
175
00:07:37,057 --> 00:07:39,124
- Oh, slow.
176
00:07:39,125 --> 00:07:40,359
So.
177
00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:43,629
However Eloise, a modern
record is about to be set.
178
00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:46,231
I haven't been
bothered once by Dennis
179
00:07:46,232 --> 00:07:48,634
in an entire 24 hour period.
180
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:49,902
- Oh John.
181
00:07:49,903 --> 00:07:52,671
- For my part, it couldn't
come at a better time.
182
00:07:52,672 --> 00:07:54,807
If I do a good job
on this article
183
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:57,142
it may open up an
entire new market for me
184
00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:59,812
in space age writing.
185
00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:02,314
- John, isn't that
still the first page?
186
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,150
Now dear, I thought you did
all your research last week.
187
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:07,720
- Eloise, one just
doesn't sit down
188
00:08:07,721 --> 00:08:11,156
and write a scientific
article about planets.
189
00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:12,858
- Oh.
190
00:08:12,859 --> 00:08:14,928
Does one visit a few
of them first dear?
191
00:08:34,381 --> 00:08:35,514
Oh!
192
00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,416
I see Dennis has made
friends with Mr. Haynes.
193
00:08:37,417 --> 00:08:39,218
They're over in the
park playing checkers.
194
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:42,054
- They are?
195
00:08:42,055 --> 00:08:43,790
Eloise, I couldn't care less.
196
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:50,863
- So you think you got me, huh?
197
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:52,264
- No Mr. Haynes.
198
00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:54,100
But I think you
think I've gotcha.
199
00:08:59,639 --> 00:09:00,540
- Oh nuts!
200
00:09:10,016 --> 00:09:11,450
- John, there's
enough paper in here
201
00:09:11,451 --> 00:09:13,852
to have written nine articles.
202
00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:15,421
- I know why I can't get started.
203
00:09:15,422 --> 00:09:17,156
It's too quite here.
204
00:09:17,157 --> 00:09:18,657
- Let's play something.
205
00:09:18,658 --> 00:09:20,225
- What do you want to play?
206
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:21,093
- I don't care.
207
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:22,094
What do you want
to play Seymour?
208
00:09:22,095 --> 00:09:24,563
- I'm hungry.
209
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:27,032
- Can't you boys make any
more noise than that?
210
00:09:27,033 --> 00:09:29,234
- I'm tired.
211
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:32,705
- Seymour, you've been
here less than an hour.
212
00:09:32,706 --> 00:09:35,207
- Are you really going to give
us each a time Mr. Wilson, just
213
00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,142
for sitting here
and making noises?
214
00:09:37,143 --> 00:09:39,578
- I am.
215
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:42,915
- I think he flipped his lid.
216
00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:47,052
- Seymour, I'm not employing
you as my psychiatrist.
217
00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:49,421
- I want my dime now.
218
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:50,656
- All right, all right.
219
00:09:50,657 --> 00:09:53,258
I'll give you all
your dimes now.
220
00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,793
Oh my goodness.
221
00:09:54,794 --> 00:09:55,561
Here you are.
222
00:09:55,562 --> 00:09:57,830
There's yours, yours.
223
00:09:57,831 --> 00:09:59,164
- Thanks a lot Mr. Wilson.
224
00:09:59,165 --> 00:10:01,700
- And there's yours.
225
00:10:01,701 --> 00:10:03,169
- It's OK I guess.
226
00:10:15,148 --> 00:10:16,949
- Oh come on fellas.
227
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:18,550
Can;t you make some real noise?
228
00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:20,753
[scream]
229
00:10:20,754 --> 00:10:23,856
- Seymour, not that
kind of noise.
230
00:10:23,857 --> 00:10:27,159
As if you were playing
football or something.
231
00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:27,960
- OK.
232
00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:29,028
Throw it here.
233
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:30,229
- Here it comes.
234
00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:31,096
- I've got it.
235
00:10:31,097 --> 00:10:31,797
Got it!
236
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:32,765
- Oh no you don't.
237
00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:34,700
I got a touchdown!
238
00:10:34,701 --> 00:10:36,135
- What do you mean touchdown?
239
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:38,971
- Yeah Seymour, what
do you mean touchdown?
240
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:42,708
- I want extra dimes,
they're yelling at me.
241
00:10:42,709 --> 00:10:46,211
- All right fellas,
that's enough.
242
00:10:46,212 --> 00:10:48,814
- Didn't our noise help you
think better Mr. Wilson?
243
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:52,651
- Well I hoped it would, Tommy,
but it simply is not working.
244
00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:53,886
- Gee, that's tough.
245
00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:54,553
- Yeah.
246
00:10:54,554 --> 00:10:55,754
Well, goodbye boys.
247
00:10:55,755 --> 00:10:56,722
- Bye Mr. Wilson.
248
00:10:56,723 --> 00:10:57,723
Thanks for the dime.
249
00:10:57,724 --> 00:10:58,692
- Yeah thanks.
250
00:11:03,697 --> 00:11:05,497
- Hi Mr. Wilson!
251
00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:07,833
- Dennis, what are
you doing here?
252
00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:09,568
- Well I know I shouldn't
be here Mr. Wilson.
253
00:11:09,569 --> 00:11:12,571
But I just had to say
hello on my way home.
254
00:11:12,572 --> 00:11:14,506
- Well, hello.
255
00:11:14,507 --> 00:11:16,342
- How's the article coming?
256
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:19,445
- Oh Dennis, don't you start.
257
00:11:19,446 --> 00:11:21,413
- Start what Mr. Wilson?
258
00:11:21,414 --> 00:11:24,450
- Dennis, I have been sitting
at this unholy typewriter
259
00:11:24,451 --> 00:11:26,352
like a bump on a
log for two days,
260
00:11:26,353 --> 00:11:30,422
and I'm in no mood--
wait a minute.
261
00:11:30,423 --> 00:11:31,424
I think I have an opening.
262
00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:35,694
- See Mr. Wilson.
263
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:38,897
I'm bringing you good luck
and you're not even sneezing.
264
00:11:38,898 --> 00:11:42,634
- Please Dennis, don't you
see that I'm-- I'm-- I'm--
265
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:44,536
[sneeze]
266
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:48,474
- Guess I'm still doing it to
you after all, huh Mr. Wilson?
267
00:11:48,475 --> 00:11:50,676
[sneeze]
268
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:52,811
- What's going on here?
269
00:11:52,812 --> 00:11:53,979
- Hi Mrs. Wilson.
270
00:11:53,980 --> 00:11:55,414
I've just stopped by to--
271
00:11:55,415 --> 00:11:56,782
[sneeze]
272
00:11:56,783 --> 00:11:58,584
- Oh Dennis.
273
00:11:58,585 --> 00:11:59,184
- I'm going.
274
00:11:59,185 --> 00:11:59,918
Bye Mr. Wilson.
275
00:11:59,919 --> 00:12:01,520
Bye Mrs. Wilson.
276
00:12:01,521 --> 00:12:03,655
- Goodbye dear.
277
00:12:03,656 --> 00:12:04,523
[sneeze]
278
00:12:04,524 --> 00:12:07,693
- That darn kid.
279
00:12:07,694 --> 00:12:11,663
- Man, who only yesterday, as
measured by the sands of time
280
00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:13,832
thought of his world
as flat and huge,
281
00:12:13,833 --> 00:12:16,402
is today turning the
genius of his intellect
282
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:19,438
towards that vast infinity of
universe that surrounds him.
283
00:12:19,439 --> 00:12:21,640
Oh John, that's good!
284
00:12:21,641 --> 00:12:23,776
- There's only one thing
wrong with it Eloise.
285
00:12:23,777 --> 00:12:25,411
- Well what's that dear?
286
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:28,681
- I can't write like that
unless Dennis is bothering me.
287
00:12:28,682 --> 00:12:31,985
- If he's here, I sneeze
my silly head off.
288
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:33,452
- Oh.
289
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:35,387
DENNIS (ON RECORDER)
Hi, Mr. Wilson.
290
00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:37,322
How's it going this afternoon?
291
00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:39,324
You busy, huh?
292
00:12:39,325 --> 00:12:41,794
How you feeling Mr. Wilson?
293
00:12:41,795 --> 00:12:43,729
[inaudible] Mr. Wilson?
294
00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:46,699
Have you ever had
false teeth Mr. Wilson?
295
00:12:46,700 --> 00:12:47,866
Have you seen a
hungry looking lost
296
00:12:47,867 --> 00:12:50,336
goat around here Mr. Wilson?
297
00:12:50,337 --> 00:12:52,471
ALICE (OFFSCREEN): Well I
called Doctor Johnson again.
298
00:12:52,472 --> 00:12:57,142
But he has no new suggestions
for-- a lost goat?
299
00:12:57,143 --> 00:12:58,277
DENNIS (ON RECORDER): Hi, Mom.
300
00:12:58,278 --> 00:13:01,180
Poor Mr. Wilson's paying
me $0.50 just to bother
301
00:13:01,181 --> 00:13:03,515
him on this tape recorder.
302
00:13:03,516 --> 00:13:04,884
Well I'm just saying
anything that I--
303
00:13:08,555 --> 00:13:10,356
- It's no use Eloise.
304
00:13:10,357 --> 00:13:12,925
Dennis has bothering
down to such a fine art
305
00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:14,961
it has to be done in person.
306
00:13:15,061 --> 00:13:16,061
- The tape wouldn't work?
307
00:13:16,062 --> 00:13:18,430
Aw, I'm sorry dear.
308
00:13:18,431 --> 00:13:20,232
- Well that settles it.
309
00:13:20,233 --> 00:13:21,700
- Settles what?
310
00:13:21,701 --> 00:13:24,169
- Eloise, I have grown
accustomed to Dennis
311
00:13:24,170 --> 00:13:25,838
bothering me while I work.
312
00:13:25,839 --> 00:13:28,907
Just as other people have
grow accustomed to hives.
313
00:13:28,908 --> 00:13:31,343
When they stop scratching it's
throws their entire schedule
314
00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:32,177
off.
315
00:13:32,178 --> 00:13:33,645
Well my entire schedule is off.
316
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:37,550
And it will stay off unless I
do something drastic, and now!
317
00:13:50,864 --> 00:13:53,799
{\an8}[hammering]
318
00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:55,267
{\an8}- Henry come here.
319
00:13:55,268 --> 00:13:56,703
[hammering]
320
00:14:10,550 --> 00:14:14,253
- John Wilson, you
are being ridiculous.
321
00:14:14,254 --> 00:14:15,854
{\an8}Now dear, putting
the house up for sale
322
00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:18,557
{\an8}is not going to help you
write that article by Friday.
323
00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:22,861
{\an8}- Eloise, I have made up my mind.
324
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,663
- What's going on over here?
325
00:14:24,664 --> 00:14:27,633
You folks decide to move to
the right side of the tracks?
326
00:14:27,634 --> 00:14:29,368
- Hello Henry.
327
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:32,137
Meet the nut of the month.
328
00:14:32,138 --> 00:14:33,439
- No use Henry.
329
00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:36,141
When a writer can't work he
has only two alternatives,
330
00:14:36,142 --> 00:14:41,113
to move to a new environment
or starve to death.
331
00:14:41,114 --> 00:14:43,082
- And as you could see
from the shape John's in,
332
00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:46,418
it with take him years
to starve to death.
333
00:14:46,419 --> 00:14:47,853
- I don't understand John.
334
00:14:47,854 --> 00:14:50,522
Has Dennis been around making
your allergy flare up again?
335
00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:52,224
I told him to stay away.
336
00:14:52,225 --> 00:14:53,993
- Dennis hasn't been around.
337
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:55,594
John's upset because he hasn't.
338
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:57,129
He misses him.
339
00:14:57,130 --> 00:15:01,467
- I am not upset, and
I do not miss him.
340
00:15:01,468 --> 00:15:05,304
Well I mean, well this is
a difficult problem Henry.
341
00:15:05,305 --> 00:15:08,207
I'm not sure that I
understand it myself.
342
00:15:08,208 --> 00:15:13,145
It's simply that I can not
work unless Dennis is around
343
00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:15,414
bothering me.
344
00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:18,283
But I-- I can't have him
around because, well he
345
00:15:18,284 --> 00:15:20,285
makes me sneeze my head off.
346
00:15:20,286 --> 00:15:20,919
- Hmm.
347
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:21,821
That is a problem.
348
00:15:26,526 --> 00:15:29,061
- Well it's true.
349
00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:31,930
John Wilson's putting a for
sale sign up on his house.
350
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,632
- A for sale sign?
351
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:35,701
Do you mean Mr. Wilson's
going to sell his house
352
00:15:35,702 --> 00:15:37,269
and move away?
353
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:38,103
- Yes Dennis.
354
00:15:38,104 --> 00:15:40,706
Mr. Wilson has quite a problem.
355
00:15:40,707 --> 00:15:41,907
- Boy.
356
00:15:41,908 --> 00:15:44,510
I never thought he'd
take it this hard.
357
00:15:44,511 --> 00:15:47,546
- Well dear, it's nothing
to blame yourself for.
358
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:49,381
- Who else can you blame mom?
359
00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:52,584
When a swell guy like Mr. Wilson
can't work with me around,
360
00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:54,086
and he's going to
move away because I
361
00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:55,488
make him sneeze all the time.
362
00:16:03,029 --> 00:16:05,097
Now remember Willy,
you're not to fight
363
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:06,765
with Hortense after I'm gone.
364
00:16:06,766 --> 00:16:08,635
She's a girl.
ALICE (OFFSCREEN): Dennis.
365
00:16:18,078 --> 00:16:19,845
- Oh goodness, you
got in bed fast,
366
00:16:19,846 --> 00:16:21,647
- You said it.
367
00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:24,249
- I wouldn't worry about
Mr. Wilson moving away.
368
00:16:24,250 --> 00:16:27,052
Things usually have a
way of working out dear.
369
00:16:27,053 --> 00:16:27,920
- Goodnight Mom.
370
00:16:27,921 --> 00:16:28,688
- Goodnight dear.
371
00:16:43,870 --> 00:16:44,737
- Goodbye Sam.
372
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:47,373
It was nice know you.
373
00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:49,441
I'd take you with
me Sam, but I'm
374
00:16:49,442 --> 00:16:51,543
going to have enough trouble
just having one mouth to feed.
375
00:16:51,544 --> 00:17:15,567
[music playing]
376
00:17:15,568 --> 00:17:22,508
- Ah [inaudible], that makes
$968,000.22 you owe me.
377
00:17:22,509 --> 00:17:23,575
- Kill joy?
378
00:17:23,576 --> 00:17:24,777
- I'll play you
double or nothing.
379
00:17:24,778 --> 00:17:25,844
- What?
380
00:17:25,845 --> 00:17:27,680
I should work myself
up to practically
381
00:17:27,681 --> 00:17:30,884
being a millionaire only to be
wiped out by a game of chance?
382
00:17:34,421 --> 00:17:44,763
- Hi Excuse me.
383
00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:47,066
Could you gentlemen tell
me when the next freight
384
00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:48,233
train comes through?
385
00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:51,503
- Well that depends boy
on where you're going.
386
00:17:51,504 --> 00:17:52,671
- Anywhere.
387
00:17:52,672 --> 00:17:55,374
Are you gentlemen hobos?
388
00:17:55,375 --> 00:17:58,877
- We prefer to be known as
the gentry of the open road.
389
00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:01,513
- That's what I want to be too.
390
00:18:01,514 --> 00:18:03,649
I'm Dennis, Dennis Mitchell.
391
00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:04,817
- Well how do you do Dennis?
392
00:18:04,818 --> 00:18:07,753
I am Cecil Thorp, the third.
393
00:18:07,754 --> 00:18:10,556
- How do you do Mr. Thorp Third?
394
00:18:10,557 --> 00:18:11,690
- Hi Dennis.
395
00:18:11,691 --> 00:18:13,459
I'm Slim.
396
00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:14,793
- How do you do Mr. Slim?
397
00:18:14,794 --> 00:18:16,395
- Just call me Hog, boy.
398
00:18:16,396 --> 00:18:18,530
- Glad to make your
acquaintance Mr. Hog.
399
00:18:18,531 --> 00:18:19,933
- Sit down Dennis.
Sit down.
400
00:18:20,033 --> 00:18:23,102
{\an8}Now then Dennis, it's not
easy to join our little club,
401
00:18:23,103 --> 00:18:24,403
{\an8}you know?
402
00:18:24,404 --> 00:18:25,571
{\an8}- It's not?
403
00:18:25,572 --> 00:18:27,039
{\an8}- Well certainly not.
404
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:31,176
{\an8}To begin with, you gotta a write
your poor ole mother every day.
405
00:18:31,177 --> 00:18:34,513
{\an8}And you gotta wash behind
your ears twice a day.
406
00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:35,814
- Twice a day?
407
00:18:35,815 --> 00:18:36,648
- Of course.
408
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:38,350
What do you think we are, bums?
409
00:18:38,351 --> 00:18:42,054
- And last but not least, you
got to have an awful good reason
410
00:18:42,055 --> 00:18:44,156
to run away from home.
411
00:18:44,157 --> 00:18:45,791
You ain't married, are ya?
412
00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:46,625
- Heck no.
413
00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:48,927
But I got another good reason.
414
00:18:48,928 --> 00:18:52,331
My best friend's moving
away, and it's all my fault.
415
00:18:52,332 --> 00:18:54,133
- That bad, huh?
416
00:18:54,134 --> 00:18:57,136
- If you let me travel
with you gentleman
417
00:18:57,137 --> 00:18:59,371
I won't be trouble at all.
418
00:18:59,372 --> 00:19:01,006
I learn awful fast.
419
00:19:01,007 --> 00:19:02,608
I don't even snore.
420
00:19:02,609 --> 00:19:04,543
- Well, well.
421
00:19:04,544 --> 00:19:08,814
Well then, just smack yours
lips over this stew, boy.
422
00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:24,897
- Thanks
423
00:19:24,898 --> 00:19:26,899
- And please give my
frog Sam to Tommy.
424
00:19:26,900 --> 00:19:28,767
And tell him not to
let Sam eat too many
425
00:19:28,768 --> 00:19:31,904
flies before bedtime
because he gets indigestion.
426
00:19:31,905 --> 00:19:35,774
PS, I'm sorry I caused my
good friend Mr. Wilson all
427
00:19:35,775 --> 00:19:39,044
this trouble, and hope
now that I'm leaving he'll
428
00:19:39,045 --> 00:19:42,781
stay here and be able to write
OK, especially by Friday.
429
00:19:42,782 --> 00:19:44,249
Dennis.
430
00:19:44,250 --> 00:19:46,452
- We notified the police
as soon as we found it.
431
00:19:46,453 --> 00:19:49,054
- Yes, now we're out to do
some looking for ourselves.
432
00:19:49,055 --> 00:19:50,055
- Well I'll go with you.
433
00:19:50,056 --> 00:19:51,357
- Oh thanks Mr. Wilson.
- Goodbye
434
00:19:51,358 --> 00:19:52,257
- Goodbye Mrs. Wilson.
435
00:19:52,258 --> 00:19:53,059
- Goodbye, good luck.
436
00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:03,235
- Poor kid, he's got big
troubles for a little boy.
437
00:20:03,236 --> 00:20:04,837
- He's got big troubles?
438
00:20:04,838 --> 00:20:08,140
I owe $968,000 and
only got $0.64.
439
00:20:08,141 --> 00:20:09,375
- You're in trouble?
440
00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:13,879
I've got to collect
$968,000 from a dead beat.
441
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:17,549
[laughing]
442
00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:21,387
[yelling]
- Hold it!
443
00:20:21,388 --> 00:20:24,623
Hold it!
444
00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:27,493
Believe me folks, every
available man on the force
445
00:20:27,494 --> 00:20:28,927
is out looking for Dennis.
446
00:20:28,928 --> 00:20:30,963
I'm just as
concerned as you are.
447
00:20:30,964 --> 00:20:32,998
- Then why aren't you
out running around
448
00:20:32,999 --> 00:20:36,669
on your big flat feet Mooney?
- Yeah.
449
00:20:36,670 --> 00:20:41,240
Somebody has to mind the store.
450
00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:45,244
- Mooney, unless that child
is found with-- with-- with--
451
00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:48,714
[sneeze]
- Uh.
452
00:20:48,715 --> 00:20:50,983
For a minute I thought--
453
00:20:50,984 --> 00:20:52,484
- Excuse me Sergeant.
454
00:20:52,485 --> 00:20:53,619
John smell this hat.
455
00:20:53,620 --> 00:20:55,721
- Why should-- why should--
456
00:20:55,722 --> 00:20:56,889
[sneeze]
- Stop it!
457
00:20:56,890 --> 00:20:59,358
He's sneezing right in my hat!
458
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:02,695
- Sergeant, do you use
some sort of hair tonic?
459
00:21:02,696 --> 00:21:03,862
- I do.
460
00:21:03,863 --> 00:21:04,830
Rose blossom.
461
00:21:04,831 --> 00:21:06,165
It's odorless to humans.
462
00:21:06,166 --> 00:21:10,803
But boy, how it drives
dogs wild. [laughs]
463
00:21:10,804 --> 00:21:13,439
- Evidently dogs and Mr. Wilson.
464
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:15,341
- Same thing.
465
00:21:15,342 --> 00:21:16,742
- Now listen Mooney!
466
00:21:16,743 --> 00:21:18,143
- Please John.
467
00:21:18,144 --> 00:21:19,078
Honey?
468
00:21:19,079 --> 00:21:20,079
- It's no use dear.
469
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:22,147
Dennis doesn't use hair tonic.
470
00:21:22,148 --> 00:21:24,216
- Sergeant, we have something
here to leave with you.
471
00:21:24,217 --> 00:21:26,218
[yelling]
472
00:21:26,219 --> 00:21:27,353
- Easy now, easy.
473
00:21:27,354 --> 00:21:28,287
- Is he all right?
474
00:21:28,288 --> 00:21:29,989
- Just tuckered out is all ma'am.
475
00:21:30,090 --> 00:21:31,323
- Oh thank goodness.
476
00:21:31,324 --> 00:21:34,560
[sneeze]
477
00:21:34,561 --> 00:21:37,997
- That's the happiest
sneeze I've ever had Henry.
478
00:21:38,098 --> 00:21:39,865
- But where did you find him?
479
00:21:39,866 --> 00:21:43,369
- He dropped by our
modest track side resort.
480
00:21:43,370 --> 00:21:44,636
- Track side resort?
481
00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:45,871
I thought I told you--
482
00:21:45,872 --> 00:21:47,139
- Shhh!
483
00:21:47,140 --> 00:21:49,174
- (WHISPERING) Sergeant,
if you please.
484
00:21:49,175 --> 00:21:51,577
- (WHISPERING) Sergeant, let
us not be loud and crude.
485
00:21:51,578 --> 00:21:52,845
- Loud and crude?
486
00:21:52,846 --> 00:21:54,113
- Shhh!
487
00:21:54,114 --> 00:21:55,348
[sneeze]
- Shhh!
488
00:21:58,018 --> 00:21:59,418
- I'm his mother.
489
00:21:59,419 --> 00:22:01,286
I don't know how to thank you.
490
00:22:01,287 --> 00:22:03,288
- Well I do.
491
00:22:03,289 --> 00:22:05,290
- Oh no John, this
is my pleasure.
492
00:22:05,291 --> 00:22:06,058
- Money?
493
00:22:06,059 --> 00:22:08,127
- Sir, we are insulted.
494
00:22:08,128 --> 00:22:10,229
We wouldn't dream of
accepting recompense
495
00:22:10,230 --> 00:22:12,831
for helping a fellow hobo.
496
00:22:12,832 --> 00:22:15,234
- Fellow hobo?
497
00:22:15,235 --> 00:22:17,836
- They mean you John.
498
00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:19,271
- We mean Dennis.
499
00:22:19,272 --> 00:22:24,309
We voted him an honorary member
of our elite little clan.
500
00:22:24,310 --> 00:22:26,445
- Bye kid.
501
00:22:26,446 --> 00:22:29,882
- When he wakes up ma'am,
will you tell him goodbye?
502
00:22:29,883 --> 00:22:33,352
- I certainly will.
503
00:22:33,353 --> 00:22:38,557
- Ah, you boys aren't leaving
our fair little city are you?
504
00:22:38,558 --> 00:22:41,093
- No offense man
sergeant, it simply
505
00:22:41,094 --> 00:22:43,596
lacks the cultural
pursuits which interest us.
506
00:22:48,201 --> 00:22:49,134
- Dennis.
507
00:22:49,135 --> 00:22:50,203
Dennis wake up son.
508
00:22:53,139 --> 00:22:54,540
- Hi Mom.
509
00:22:54,541 --> 00:22:55,741
Hi Dad.
510
00:22:55,742 --> 00:22:57,810
What am I going here?
511
00:22:57,811 --> 00:23:01,146
- You fell asleep dear, and
your friends brought you here.
512
00:23:01,147 --> 00:23:04,483
- Gee wiz, why did they go
do a dumb thing like that?
513
00:23:04,484 --> 00:23:05,784
- Hello Dennis.
514
00:23:05,785 --> 00:23:07,653
[sneeze]
515
00:23:07,654 --> 00:23:10,089
- Dennis, have you been
using a hair tonic called
516
00:23:10,090 --> 00:23:12,458
rose blossom without telling us?
517
00:23:12,459 --> 00:23:13,926
- How did you find out?
518
00:23:13,927 --> 00:23:17,930
- Well dear, why did
you keep it a secret?
519
00:23:17,931 --> 00:23:20,699
- Well because a guy
my age ought to be
520
00:23:20,700 --> 00:23:22,634
able to make his dumb
old cowlick stay down
521
00:23:22,635 --> 00:23:26,071
without using that--
that greasy kid stuff.
522
00:23:26,072 --> 00:23:28,841
- Know what Dennis, I
use rose blossom too.
523
00:23:28,842 --> 00:23:32,979
To make my dumb old
cowlick stay down.
524
00:23:33,079 --> 00:23:34,414
[sneeze]
525
00:23:37,117 --> 00:23:39,418
- But Saturn's most
remarkable feature
526
00:23:39,419 --> 00:23:43,322
is its system of rings that it--
527
00:23:43,323 --> 00:23:46,258
- Gee Mr. Wilson, isn't it
swell that me new hair tonic
528
00:23:46,259 --> 00:23:47,559
doesn't make you sneeze?
529
00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:48,927
- Dennis, as you
can take yourself,
530
00:23:48,928 --> 00:23:51,163
and your new hair tonic,
and you can just--
531
00:23:51,164 --> 00:23:52,131
- John!
532
00:23:52,132 --> 00:23:54,633
- Eh, go and sit
down, and keep me
533
00:23:54,634 --> 00:23:56,735
company until this
article is finished.
534
00:23:56,736 --> 00:23:58,504
- OK Mr. Wilson.
535
00:23:58,505 --> 00:24:01,206
Since you really need me.
536
00:24:01,207 --> 00:24:06,078
- Dennis, I need you
like a dog needs a flea.
537
00:24:06,079 --> 00:24:07,046
Powder
538
00:24:07,047 --> 00:24:07,913
- You know something?
539
00:24:07,914 --> 00:24:09,882
Mr. Haynes is a nice man.
540
00:24:09,883 --> 00:24:14,086
But as far as I'm considered,
there's only one Mr. Wilson,
541
00:24:14,087 --> 00:24:15,888
and you're him!
542
00:24:15,889 --> 00:24:17,790
- There, now aren't
you lucky dear?
543
00:24:17,791 --> 00:24:20,526
- Oh, I'm the luck-- luck--
lucky one all right Eloise.
544
00:24:20,527 --> 00:24:21,694
[laughing]
545
00:24:21,695 --> 00:24:24,930
- Well I'm lucky too
because-- cause-- cause--
546
00:24:24,931 --> 00:24:28,567
[sneeze]
547
00:24:28,568 --> 00:24:32,571
- Jeepers Mr. Wilson, you aren't
using rose blossom hair tonic
548
00:24:32,572 --> 00:24:35,908
to make your cowlick
stay down, are ya?
549
00:24:35,909 --> 00:24:38,578
- Oh for crying out loud.
550
00:24:52,959 --> 00:24:56,096
[theme music]
38512
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