Original subtitles

- As soon as I finish my tea, I better run along.

- Oh, don't hurry. - I have to go to the--

[door slam] - market and--

- Hi mom!

I'm home!

- Hello, dear.

- Hello, Dennis.

- Well, hi Mrs. Wilson.

Mom, I'm hungry. - All right.

I'll fix you a sandwich.

How was school?

- Swell.

And you know what?

Everybody in our class has to write a composition.

- Oh good!

- A composition.

Isn't that pretty advanced for Dennis's class?

- Everything they write is called a composition.

Miss Morrison likes to make their assignments very

important.

What's it going to be about?

- Friends.

Miss Morrison says for me to pick out my very best friend

and write all about him.

- Oh, that's a nice assignment.

You have lots of good friends.

- I sure have.

I've got so many friends it's hard to decide.

But I guess my best friend in the whole world

is good ol' Mr. Wilson.

So that's what I'm gonna write about.

- Well, that's sweet of you, Dennis.

Mr. Wilson will be very proud to hear it.

He's so fond of you.

- I'll go tell him in a minute.

But first I have to see Tommy.

He's waiting outside for me.

[theme music]

- Tax assessor.

City Hall.

- Here Tinkerbell!

Tinker!

Here kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty!

Oh.

Mr. Wilson, have you seen my kitty?

- No, Mrs. Elkins, I haven't seen your Tinkerbell at all,

I'm happy to say.

- She's around here is somewhere.

- I strongly protest the-- I handed assessment--

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN): (LOUDLY) Hello--

- of my prop--

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN): (LOUDLY) Mr. Wilson!

- Oh.

- What are you doing, Mr. Wilson, making paper wads?

No, I am not making paper wads.

- Sure got a lot of them.

- What do you boys want?

Can't you see I'm busy?

- Guess what, Mr. Wilson.

I'm going to write a compensation for school,

and it's called My Best Friend.

And you know who I'm gonna write about?

You.

- Oh, well that's just fine, Dennis.

Now, run on. I'm--

- And you're invited to come to school next week

and hear me read it.

- Dennis, I can't come to school next week or any other week.

I am busy!

Now go on and pester somebody else!

- Well, I guess we can talk about it later.

I just wanted it-- Gee, look what

happened to your pruning sheers.

I didn't know they come apart like this.

- Oh, for heaven's sakes, Dennis!

Why can't you learn to keep your hands off my--

- He didn't do anything.

- I just picked them up Mr. Wilson.

- Well, everything you touch comes apart.

Now go on home, both of you. - OK.

But if you're going to be my best friend,

be in my composition-- - Oh, Dennis.

I'm not your best friend at all.

You've got lots better friends than I am, believe me.

Now, home!

Home!

- Well, of all the nasty attitudes.

- Oh, are you still here, Mrs. Elkins?

I thought you'd gone home.

- I never heard such a thing.

How anyone could talk like that to an innocent little child.

- Innocent little chi-- Dennis Mitchell?

- Oh, everyone knows you hate animals and children, Mr.

Wilson. - Why, I do not any such thing.

Dennis was bothering me when I'm busy--

- Oh, no one's that busy to refuse a precious gift

of friendship from an innocent little child.

Well, it-- it-- it's reprehensible!

- Oh, for Pete's sake.

Mrs. Elkins, why don't you go chase Tinkerbell up a tree!

- Well, believe me.

The whole town will hear about this.

- Oh! Fiddle-faddle!

- And Mrs. Elkins didn't know I was there.

She was telling it all over the grocery store.

- Sadly.

- How she was here in the yard and heard the whole thing.

Of course, the minute she saw me, she shut up.

- I'd like to see her shut up in a packing box

and shipped to China!

- She's telling everyone that you hate children.

- She ought to be arrested!

Me hate children?

That is absolutely ridiculous.

- Oh, if you only hadn't been so impatient with Dennis.

He only came over to tell you about his composition,

about his friendship for you.

- Well, Martha, being friends with Dennis

is like being friends with a porcupine.

I always get stuck!

- My best friend, good ol' Mr. Wilson.

That's what he's writing about.

- Yes. I know.

Well, I suppose I shouldn't have been so short with him,

but I was busy.

- We've been invited to school to hear him read it next week,

you know. - Well, I can't go, Martha.

I've got no time for that kind of foolishness.

- I don't think it's foolishness to sit there and listen

to a little boy read his composition about what

a good friend you are.

- Well, I suppose.

- In front of a room full of children and their parents.

- Their parents?

- They've all been invited, the same parents

that Mrs. Elkins was talking to about you.

- Hmm.

Well, I suppose it would be sort of good publicity for me,

wouldn't it?

Show the people around here the kind of person I really am.

- Indeed it would.

- Oh, I suppose I shouldn't have snapped at Dennis the way

I did.

It's just that he's so destructive.

He breaks things when he comes over here.

Look at this.

Ruined!

- George, I did that.

- You what?

- They just came apart.

The screw's on the shelf in the patio.

- Oh, no.

Well, I just naturally assumed that Dennis-- I

mean-- Oh, good gracious.

Oh!

Oh, I am ashamed of myself.

- I think you should be.

- Martha, I have treated that boy shabbily.

By golly, Martha, I'm going over there right now

and apologize to him.

- Good for you.

- And if Dennis wants to write a composition

about what a good friend I am and read it

in front of everybody, I'll let him.

- You're sweet.

- You know, Martha.

He's awfully fond of me.

I'm sort of his idol, you might say.

- Indeed, you are.

- And here I've cast him aside, rejected him.

Why, that poor little fella must be absolutely crushed!

- And I can keep it for my very own!

Isn't this a swell thing for Opie to give me, Mom?

- Oh, it's simply beautiful!

A real Indian headdress.

- A war bonnet!

It's a beauty, son.

- And look what Opie gave me.

A real authentic Indian rubber tomahawk!

- My, that certainly is nice of him.

- He sure is swell to kids.

Boy, I got so many best friends, I don't who to write about,

dad!

- Well, if you're going over to Tommy's in time for dinner,

I think you better get a move on and get your things together.

- Yeah!

Come on, Tommy.

You can help me pack!

- Help him pack?

A pair of pajamas and a toothbrush?

- Oh, wouldn't be simple as that!

He'll have to take along his six guns, his space

helmet, his football.

Oh, I tell you.

Staying away from overnight takes an awful lot--

[doorbell]

- Oh, Hi Mr. Wilson.

- Oh--

- Come on in. - Good evening, Mitchell.

Thank you.

Oh, I'm not going to stay, Alice.

I know it's close to dinner time.

I just, uh--

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN): Who came in, Mom?

Anybody?

- Oh, it's your good ol' friend, Mr. Wilson, Dennis!

- Hi, Mr. Wilson!

I'm going to stay all night with Tommy.

See you later!

- Very busy boy today. - Yes.

He's got quite a problem.

He has to write a composition for school on my best friend

and he can't quite decide who it is.

Got so many, he says.

- Oh.

Well, I'll-- I'll run along.

I just brought him a little present.

Thought he might like it.

You can give it to him when I'm gone.

- Well, he's never that busy.

I'll call him down.

- Yes.

You give it to him yourself.

That certainly was nice of you.

- Dennis!

Come down a minute.

Mr. Wilson brought you a present!

- Oh, I'll take it in here and unwrap it.

I want to surprise him.

- A present!

Oh, boy!

What have you got for me!

Where is he? - All right.

All right. Take it easy.

He's right in here.

- Now, wait in the doorway, now Dennis!

- OK, Mr. Wilson!

Oh, boy!

- It's something you've always wanted

and I bought it just for you!

- Well, Dennis, what do you say?

- Sure is a little bitty one, isn't it?

- Dennis!

- But thanks, though, Mr. Wilson, anyhow.

Hey, Tommy!

Look at the little Indian hat!

You can wear it, and be the little chief.

I'll be the big chief with this one that Opie gave me!

[indian sounds]

- And we had lemon pie for dinner,

and Mrs. Anderson let us watch TV till 8:30!

And that's not all!

Tommy gave me all these comic books to keep!

- You really need comic books?

- Boy, Tommy Anderson's one of the best friends I've got.

But another best friend is Opie Swanson,

because look what Opie just gave me!

See?

I can turn the winder and make it any time I want it to be.

That's because it's empty.

- That's great!

I always say there's nothing like an empty watch.

- I guess when I write my composition, my really best

friend will be Opie, because he gives me

more swell stuff than anybody.

- Now, wait a minute, son.

You don't judge your friends by the gifts they can give you.

- Well, certainly not, Dennis.

There's much more to it than that.

You can't buy real friendship with presents.

- Oh, presents are sure friendly, though.

I like to get them.

- I think we all like to get presents,

but, well, a real friend is someone who trusts you.

Someone who believes in you.

- Someone who forgives you when you do something wrong, and who

helps you when you're in trouble.

- Well, Mr. Wilson does that sometimes.

He ran out in the yard without it glasses one night

and killed a stuffed moose head, because he thought

it was after me and Tommy, remember?

- Yes.

And there was a plaster of Paris and fur all over everything.

- Mr. Wilson's a very good friend of yours, Dennis.

- And so is Tommy.

- And to be perfectly honest, so is Opie Swanson.

- Yeah. All of them are.

Jeepers, now I don't know who to write

my composition about again.

- Well, you run on outside and play.

But don't go too far from the house.

- OK.

I think I'll go over and talk to Mr. Wilson.

- Good idea.

- Don't go anywhere else now.

I may have to go out this afternoon

and I'll want to know where you are.

- OK.

So far, my best friend is a tie between three people.

But maybe one of them will do something so friendly

that I'll just have to pick him for the best.

- You are absolutely, Martha.

Dennis is old enough to know who his real friends are.

- Of course, he is.

- Well, it would be fine publicity for me

around the neighborhood to be in that composition of his,

but I am not going to try to influence him at all.

- I don't think you should.

- If Opie Swanson wants to fawn all over him

and shower him with gifts and make a fool of himself,

let him. But not me.

- Good for you.

- I'll treat Dennis the way I always

have, with love and affection, but with a firm hand.

Oh, you have to have a firm hand with Dennis, Martha.

[door close]

- Hi, Mr. Wilson!

- Well, Dennis!

How are you?

How's my very best friend?

- Well, Mr. Wilson, I'm almost-- Gee whiz,

I didn't mean to-- I didn't see the-- What happened?

- Oh, now, now, now, now.

It wasn't your fault at all, Dennis.

Don't you worry about it.

I'll fix it all up tomorrow.

Now, do you know what you and I are going to do right now,

little pal?

- What, Mr. Wilson?

- We are going to drive down to the department store

and see what they have in the toy department.

How about that?

- Oh, boy!

Just for nothing?

Wow!

I'll race you to the car!

- That's what he needs, yes.

A firm hand.

- Gee, these are sure swell presents.

You're awful like the kids.

- Well, you and I are best friends, Dennis.

I like to do things for my best friend.

- Sure is lucky we ran into Tommy so he could go with u

- Sure is, boy!

- Oh, yes.

It doubled my expenses, but any friend of yours

is a friend of mine.

Dennis, when you read that composition of yours,

I'll be at the school to hear it.

- Oh, boy!

Swell!

I knew you'd come!

I'll let you know who it's about when I write it.

- Who it's about?

But I thought--

- So far my best friend is a tie, but you sure are one of them,

though!

Come on, Tommy.

Let's take all this stuff home.

- Boy, if I was writing it, I'd write about you.

All these presents.

- Presents haven't got anything to do

with being best friends, Tommy.

- It hasn't?

- Of course not.

Friendship isn't just buying things for people.

My mom says you can't buy friendship with money.

Right, Mr. Wilson?

- Oh.

Well, yes.

Your mother's absolutely right, of course.

I just wish he'd said that about $23 sooner.

- But mom, it wasn't my fault.

Good ol' Mr. Wilson took us downtown and bought us all

this--

- Didn't I tell you not to go anywhere without telling me?

Mr. Wilson was out.

Mrs. Wilson was out.

I didn't know where you were!

- Well, I forgot!

- Well, maybe it would help you remember the next time

if you sit right there in the corner for one hour.

- One hour!

Oh, mom!

That's an awful long time.

- The sooner you get started, the sooner

you can go out and play again.

Now sit.

- Sit.

Gee whiz, you'd think I was a dog.

Sit, she says.

- I have to go pick up your father at the golf course.

Now, it's 3 o'clock.

I'll be home by 4:00.

I don't want you to leave that chair.

You know the rules.

- (SADLY) Oh, all right.

- Have to sit in the corner, eh?

Oh, that's too bad.

Maybe if I go explain to Mrs. Mitchell--

- Oh, she went out somewhere.

And he has to sit there for a whole hour in that empty house,

and nobody can talk to him or anything.

- Hmm.

A whole hour of peace and quiet.

He's all alone in the house?

Nobody can even talk to him?

- Nope. It's not allowed.

- Sounds very restful.

Tommy, how many parents do you think

will be at school when Dennis, uh, reads his composition?

- Everybody, I guess.

There'll be Margaret's mom, Joey's, and Chuck,

and Johnny's, Mrs. Elkins, and everybody.

I'll see you later.

- Certainly be a friendly gesture if I went over there and-- Yes.

Anybody who'd do a thing like that

is bound to be his best friend.

- You will, Mr. Wilson?

You'll sit in the corner for me?

- Why, of course!

When a man is your best friend like I

am, Dennis, why, he'll do anything for you.

Besides, it was partly my fault.

- Well, I told mom it was all your fault.

She's making me sit here anyhow.

- Well, I'll explain to your mother,

and I'll sit out the hour for you.

- I'd better not, Mr. Wilson.

She was pretty mad.

And she told me not to get out of this chair for an hour.

So maybe I'd better--

- Oh, now Dennis, don't you worry about a thing.

I'll explain it all to your mother.

Well, this kind of like a football game, you see.

I'm just being your substitute!

- Yeah!

Swell. Swell!

Like football.

Mom knows about football.

Oh, not that chair.

She won't ever let me sit in anything but this chair.

This is the corner sitting chair.

- I don't know.

I'm kind of--

- Mom's always strict about the rules.

- Well, I suppose we have to do it by the rules!

- We sure do, because if we break any,

she makes me start all over for another hour.

Now here's the rules.

You're not allowed to speak, or talk, or say anything

to anybody. - Good.

Good.

- And you have to face the corner,

and you can't turn around.

And if you draw pictures on the wall,

you have to stay in the whole weekend.

- I didn't even bring my crayon.

- There's only one good thing.

She let's you look at comic books.

- Ah, but-- Well, I'll get along just splendidly.

I'll just sit here and rest and think.

Now, Dennis, you just run on and play.

- Gee, Mr. Wilson, this is the swellest thing anybody

ever did for me.

You sure are my best friend in the whole world.

And now I know who to write about.

MRS. ELKINS (OFFSCREEN): Here, kitty!

Kitty, kitty, kitty!

- Boy, that old cat of hers is always lost.

- Oh, hello boys.

Have you seen my kitty?

- No, ma'am.

She was in Mr. Wilson's yard this morning.

- But he chased her out.

- Chased my kit-- Oh, of all-- Oh,

I'd like to tell him what I think of him right now.

- He's not allowed to talk to anybody now.

It's against the rules.

- He has to just sit there till 4 o'clock.

- Sit where?

What are you talking about?

- Mr. Wilson.

He's sitting in the corner in our kitchen

reading a comic book.

And he has to stay there the whole hour.

And he's doing it just for me.

- Oh!

This I must see!

Isn't your mother home?

- No, ma'am.

- Well, let's go look!

- Still sitting there.

- Oh, if that isn't a picture!

I always thought you must be in your second childhood!

- How did you--

- Oh, little Jack Horner.

You dropped your comic book!

Oh, will the girls love this!

- Mr. Wilson!

Wait!

My hour isn't up yet!

Are you coming back later, Mr. Wilson?

I just shake all over.

The most embarrassing moment of my life!

I feel like a dunce!

- Well, you certainly are not!

- Well, then why do I act like one?

I tell you, Martha, every time I get mixed up with Dennis,

I get murdered!

- All right, dear.

Let's forget it.

- Well, what do I care who Dennis's best friend is anyhow.

It's not me.

I can't afford it!

- All right, dear.

Now, don't let's talk about it anymore.

- This has cost me my whole reputation

as a man of dignity with that Elkins woman

blabbering all over the neighborhood about-- Oh.

- All right, dear.

Now, don't think-- - Fall on the floor--

- about it at all. - and make me a perfect idiot.

- Now you sit down. [doorbell]

- Oh, the doorbell.

- You know, you don't have to go to the school at all.

I'll tell Alice you don't fell well.

Oh, hello, Henry. - Hi, Ms. Wilson.

- Come on in.

- Hi, Mr. Wilson!

- Oh, hello, Mitchell.

Nice to see you. Sit down.

- Oh, thanks.

I can't.

I can only stay a minute.

Dennis wrote his composition tonight.

You know the one about My Best Friend for school?

- Oh, well, I won't be there to hear him read it.

Uh, something came up.

- Well, then I'm especially glad that I brought it over.

Alice and I thought you'd like to read it.

- Oh, well, you think it's all right?

I mean Dennis won't mind? - Sure, go ahead.

Read it.

- My best friend, by Dennis Mitchell.

My best friend is the best friend any boy ever had.

And his name is good ol' Mr. Wilson!

- Oh.

- He's kind to dogs, and animals, and flowers,

and he's awful good to kids, especially me.

And--

- No matter what I break, Mr. Wilson always gets over it.

And when I get in trouble, he always helps me out.

And if I'm in real bad trouble, sometimes he even

takes my punishment for me.

I'm a lucky kid to have a lot of good friends.

But how about a big hand for my best friend, good ol' Mr.

Wilson!

- That was very good, Dennis.

A fine composition.

Well, that concludes our day.

I know all your parents are very proud of you.

You children may go.

- We've enjoyed this so much, Mrs. Morrison.

- Well, I'm so glad you could come.

You certainly have a great admirer here, Mr. Wilson.

- Oh, well, the feeling is mutual, Miss Morrison.

Why, Dennis is my best friend, too!

He knows I'd do anything for him.

- And I've got the best mom and dad

in the whole world, too, Miss Morrison.

- I'm sure you have, Dennis.

- Boy, are they patient.

And they never get mad at me when

I get in trouble, because they know how easy it

is for kids to get in trouble, don't ya?

- Well, if we don't, nobody does.

- I have a peculiar feeling that all of this

is leading up to something.

Is there a problem, Miss Morrison?

- There was a little pushing contest

at the drinking fountain.

Dennis couldn't stay in line it seems.

One little girl was so drenched I had to send her home.

- Yeah, that dumb old Margaret made

us wait while she gave her doll a drink!

- So Dennis is going to sit in the corner for one hour.

- Dennis, what in the world are your mother

and I going to do with you?

- Don't worry, dad! You don't have to do anything!

My best friend and I, we can handle this, all right.

Here you are, Mr. Wilson.

And don't you worry.

I'll be playing right outside the whole hour.

- Great Scott!

[theme music]

MALE SPEAKER (OFFSCREEN): This has been a Screen Gems film

production from the Hollywood Studios of Columbia Pictures.