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1
00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:09,324
Hello, Dad! Hi, Chip.
2
00:00:09,377 --> 00:00:11,810
Hi, Dad!
3
00:00:11,846 --> 00:00:13,189
Robbie did it again, Dad.
4
00:00:13,213 --> 00:00:14,274
Oh?
5
00:00:14,298 --> 00:00:16,076
Tramp, Tramp, heel. Now stop it.
6
00:00:16,100 --> 00:00:17,833
Will you heel?
7
00:00:17,885 --> 00:00:19,112
That'll be the day, wouldn't it?
8
00:00:19,136 --> 00:00:20,480
What did Robbie do this time?
9
00:00:20,504 --> 00:00:22,871
He threw my whole rock
collection in the backyard.
10
00:00:22,906 --> 00:00:25,173
Oh... You going to
talk to Robbie, Dad?
11
00:00:25,208 --> 00:00:27,087
Yeah, I'll talk to him.
12
00:00:27,111 --> 00:00:28,276
Will you look at this?!
13
00:00:28,312 --> 00:00:30,279
What is it? It
used to be a shirt.
14
00:00:30,314 --> 00:00:31,892
Oh. That Robbie's the
toughest kid on clothes
15
00:00:31,916 --> 00:00:33,081
I've ever seen in my life.
16
00:00:33,117 --> 00:00:34,416
This thing's only a month old.
17
00:00:34,451 --> 00:00:35,829
Now that will give
you a little idea
18
00:00:35,853 --> 00:00:36,997
of what a friendly little game
19
00:00:37,021 --> 00:00:38,165
of touch football will do.
20
00:00:38,189 --> 00:00:39,732
There's not enough
left of this thing
21
00:00:39,756 --> 00:00:41,268
to a make a collar
for a fox terrier.
22
00:00:41,292 --> 00:00:43,069
Now, are you going
to talk to him about it?
23
00:00:43,093 --> 00:00:44,759
Yeah, I'll talk to him about it.
24
00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:46,506
Well, if it was me, I'd do
more than talk to him about it,
25
00:00:46,530 --> 00:00:47,830
I'll tell you that.
26
00:00:47,865 --> 00:00:49,309
Talk, talk, talk and no action.
27
00:00:49,333 --> 00:00:51,228
That's the trouble around
here... Talk, talk, talk.
28
00:00:51,252 --> 00:00:53,062
Nothing every
happens. Just talk.
29
00:00:53,086 --> 00:00:54,698
Okay, Tramp,
it's your turn next.
30
00:00:54,722 --> 00:00:56,162
What's your complaint
against Robbie?
31
00:00:57,224 --> 00:00:58,935
I was only kidding.
32
00:00:58,959 --> 00:01:00,436
I was just kidding,
Tramp, I didn't mean it.
33
00:01:00,460 --> 00:01:02,005
Quiet...
34
00:01:02,029 --> 00:01:04,278
Chip, Chip, take him
out, will you, please?
35
00:01:04,315 --> 00:01:06,281
Okay, Dad. Come on, Tramp.
36
00:01:06,317 --> 00:01:09,818
What a stupe. What
a mixed-up blockhead.
37
00:01:09,853 --> 00:01:11,665
Hello, Mike. What's he done now?
38
00:01:11,689 --> 00:01:13,455
Oh, what hasn't he done?
39
00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:15,067
But this is the worst ever.
40
00:01:15,091 --> 00:01:17,726
I wish we could get rid of
that creep once and for all.
41
00:01:17,778 --> 00:01:19,522
Now, Mike, I think that
sounds just a little drastic.
42
00:01:19,546 --> 00:01:21,691
Why don't you relax and
tell me what he's done wrong,
43
00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:23,014
and I'll add it to the list.
44
00:01:23,049 --> 00:01:24,344
And I'll talk to him about it.
45
00:01:24,368 --> 00:01:27,302
Oh... Loos is the one
who should talk to him.
46
00:01:27,338 --> 00:01:28,803
Loos? Who's Loos?
47
00:01:28,839 --> 00:01:31,184
Mr. Loos... facility advisor
to the Bryant Bugle! Oh.
48
00:01:31,208 --> 00:01:33,541
Hi, Dad. Oh, Rob, I
want to talk to you.
49
00:01:33,577 --> 00:01:34,888
Well, gee, Dad,
Chip keeps putting
50
00:01:34,912 --> 00:01:36,273
his clunky old
rocks on my bed...
51
00:01:36,297 --> 00:01:37,862
Now wait a minute.
52
00:01:37,898 --> 00:01:39,743
I'm not talking about Chip's
clunky old rocks this time.
53
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:41,444
I want to know how you
could possibly get in trouble
54
00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:42,863
with the Bryant Bugle.
55
00:01:42,887 --> 00:01:44,314
What do you mean, Bryant Bugle?
56
00:01:44,338 --> 00:01:46,621
Well, Mike says...
Oh, not Robbie, Dad.
57
00:01:46,656 --> 00:01:48,072
I'm not talking about Robbie.
58
00:01:48,109 --> 00:01:49,619
Well, then who are
you talking about?
59
00:01:49,643 --> 00:01:50,837
Stu Walters!
60
00:01:50,861 --> 00:01:51,705
Oh.
61
00:01:51,729 --> 00:01:52,694
Who's Stu Walters?
62
00:01:52,730 --> 00:01:54,541
Yeah... yeah, who's Stu Walters?
63
00:01:54,565 --> 00:01:56,765
He's supposed to
be the sports editor,
64
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:58,332
but a lot he knows about sports.
65
00:01:58,368 --> 00:02:00,835
The only team he was
ever on is the debating team.
66
00:02:00,871 --> 00:02:02,070
Here, read that.
67
00:02:02,123 --> 00:02:04,851
"Mike Douglas looks
promising in the 440."
68
00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:06,391
What's wrong with that?
69
00:02:08,261 --> 00:02:10,056
Well, that's all it says.
70
00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:11,880
It doesn't even tell
how I clipped it off
71
00:02:11,915 --> 00:02:14,126
in 51 flat in practice.
72
00:02:14,150 --> 00:02:15,550
And look who wrote it.
73
00:02:15,586 --> 00:02:16,663
Agnes Finley.
74
00:02:16,687 --> 00:02:18,281
Is that a stroke of genius?
75
00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:21,072
He has her cover the track
meet and then assigns me
76
00:02:21,108 --> 00:02:23,386
to cover the girl"
swimming team.
77
00:02:23,410 --> 00:02:25,688
And all he ever does is
sit there in his swivel chair
78
00:02:25,712 --> 00:02:27,195
and play merry-go-round.
79
00:02:27,231 --> 00:02:31,466
So you see, Mr. Loos,
I'll be away four days.
80
00:02:31,501 --> 00:02:33,735
The debate team
leaves on a Tuesday
81
00:02:33,770 --> 00:02:36,738
and won't be back
until... Friday afternoon.
82
00:02:36,773 --> 00:02:38,718
Well, Stu, if you're
faced with a debate,
83
00:02:38,742 --> 00:02:40,782
you'd better forget
the paper for a week.
84
00:02:40,810 --> 00:02:42,756
I'll appoint a
substitute editor.
85
00:02:42,780 --> 00:02:44,146
Okay.
86
00:02:44,181 --> 00:02:45,947
And if we find the right man,
87
00:02:45,983 --> 00:02:49,751
I don't mind giving him
the job permanently.
88
00:02:49,787 --> 00:02:52,566
I'm pretty busy for
the rest of the year.
89
00:02:52,590 --> 00:02:54,000
Here's my stuff
for next week, Stu.
90
00:02:54,024 --> 00:02:55,301
It's not too good, but
I want to get it in early
91
00:02:55,325 --> 00:02:57,070
so I have have
a little free time.
92
00:02:57,094 --> 00:02:58,572
And the typing's a little
sloppy, too, but I guess it'll do.
93
00:02:58,596 --> 00:03:01,063
Just a minute, Russ.
94
00:03:01,098 --> 00:03:03,765
How would you like to be
substitute editor for a week?
95
00:03:03,801 --> 00:03:06,167
No, thanks. Bye.
96
00:03:06,220 --> 00:03:07,853
Hold it a second, will you.
97
00:03:07,888 --> 00:03:10,355
Look, Stu, I got too
much to do as it is already.
98
00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:12,524
My grades aren't
what they should be.
99
00:03:12,559 --> 00:03:14,371
My folks have been
after me all the time.
100
00:03:14,395 --> 00:03:16,256
I'm doing everything I
can just to keep going.
101
00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:18,375
Came down with the
flu twice this winter, too.
102
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:20,365
It set me back an awful lot.
103
00:03:21,668 --> 00:03:25,114
Still got this bad
cough... headache...
104
00:03:25,138 --> 00:03:27,717
I had to get off the
tennis team because of it.
105
00:03:27,741 --> 00:03:29,841
Okay, okay, okay, forget it!
106
00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:31,759
See you later.
107
00:03:31,795 --> 00:03:35,029
Boy, every time Russ
faces responsibility,
108
00:03:35,064 --> 00:03:37,883
he breaks out in a rash.
109
00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:39,279
Have you considered
Mike Douglas?
110
00:03:39,303 --> 00:03:40,968
Oh, I don't know.
111
00:03:41,004 --> 00:03:42,503
How about you, Agnes?
112
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:44,256
I don't think so, Mr. Loos.
113
00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:46,058
Giving up my creative position
114
00:03:46,093 --> 00:03:47,821
in exchange for an
administrative one
115
00:03:47,845 --> 00:03:51,041
would stifle certain basic
aesthetic needs which I...
116
00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:53,882
Yeah. Besides, who ever
heard of a girl sports editor?
117
00:03:53,934 --> 00:03:55,133
True.
118
00:03:55,168 --> 00:03:57,785
But it might be an
innovation our page needs.
119
00:03:57,821 --> 00:04:02,374
Mike Douglas... How
about Frank Gordon?
120
00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:03,837
Is he still on the staff?
121
00:04:03,861 --> 00:04:05,571
Why don't you give Frank a try?
122
00:04:05,595 --> 00:04:07,640
He's... well, he's
great on organization.
123
00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:10,198
He's got a nose for news.
124
00:04:10,251 --> 00:04:11,583
A fine sense of humor.
125
00:04:11,619 --> 00:04:12,895
Call Mike's house.
126
00:04:12,919 --> 00:04:14,314
Frank's usually
there at dinnertime.
127
00:04:14,338 --> 00:04:15,970
How do you know?
128
00:04:16,005 --> 00:04:17,656
Larson 0-6719.
129
00:04:21,462 --> 00:04:23,061
Hello.
130
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:25,364
Oh. Frank Gordon?
131
00:04:25,399 --> 00:04:27,049
No, he isn't.
132
00:04:27,101 --> 00:04:29,067
Hold on a second. I'll ask Mike.
133
00:04:29,103 --> 00:04:30,830
And another thing this
stupid Stu Walters does
134
00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:32,732
is try and get
funny in his column.
135
00:04:32,756 --> 00:04:35,089
Hey, hey, Mike...
- Wait a minute,
136
00:04:35,124 --> 00:04:36,591
Listen to this, Dad,
137
00:04:36,626 --> 00:04:38,926
"And then there was the
girl who thought a foul ball
138
00:04:38,962 --> 00:04:40,495
was a lousy party."
139
00:04:40,530 --> 00:04:42,797
Ha, ha, ha, very funny.
140
00:04:42,833 --> 00:04:44,678
This guy thinks he's an editor.
141
00:04:44,702 --> 00:04:47,613
Does sound a little corny.
No organization, no balance,
142
00:04:47,637 --> 00:04:49,171
no sense of news value.
143
00:04:49,206 --> 00:04:51,740
Nothing but a big soft
seat in a swivel chair.
144
00:04:51,775 --> 00:04:53,970
Hey, Mike, do you know
where Frank Gordon is?
145
00:04:53,994 --> 00:04:56,495
Not there?
146
00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:57,929
No.
147
00:04:57,965 --> 00:05:03,452
You know... it
suddenly occurs to me,
148
00:05:03,487 --> 00:05:07,222
Agnes might just be right.
149
00:05:07,257 --> 00:05:11,259
Mike would make
a darn fine editor.
150
00:05:11,312 --> 00:05:13,628
Mike's pretty busy
on the track team.
151
00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:16,748
Yeah, but he's... he's
great on organization.
152
00:05:16,784 --> 00:05:18,699
He's got a nose for news
153
00:05:18,736 --> 00:05:20,613
and a fine sense of humor.
154
00:05:20,637 --> 00:05:24,106
I never saw Mike quite that way.
155
00:05:24,141 --> 00:05:27,053
Still, if you think
he deserves it...
156
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:29,177
It's exactly what he deserves.
157
00:05:30,714 --> 00:05:33,815
Yes, sir. Good-bye.
158
00:05:33,850 --> 00:05:36,051
Whoopee!
159
00:05:36,086 --> 00:05:39,654
Bub, you're now looking
at the new sports editor
160
00:05:39,690 --> 00:05:42,007
of the Bryant High Bugle!
161
00:05:42,042 --> 00:05:43,808
Mr. Loos finally got around
162
00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:45,744
to recognizing
some of my talent!
163
00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:47,189
What talent? Ha, ha!
164
00:05:47,213 --> 00:05:48,547
You'll see in the next issue.
165
00:05:48,582 --> 00:05:49,692
Hey, what...? Dad! Dad!
166
00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:51,049
I'm right there.
167
00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,018
Oh, we made it, Dad, we made it.
168
00:05:53,053 --> 00:05:54,586
Now we'll show him, won't me?
169
00:05:54,621 --> 00:05:56,755
We sure will.
170
00:05:56,790 --> 00:05:59,073
Who are we going
to show what to who?
171
00:05:59,109 --> 00:06:00,709
Hey, Jean.
172
00:06:00,744 --> 00:06:02,777
Jean, are you there?
173
00:06:02,813 --> 00:06:04,456
What's wrong, Mike?
174
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:06,126
Well, it's finally happened.
175
00:06:06,150 --> 00:06:09,551
After all this time slaving
away as a reporter,
176
00:06:09,586 --> 00:06:12,215
I am the sports editor
of the next issue.
177
00:06:12,239 --> 00:06:13,739
Gee, that's wonderful.
178
00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,585
But won't it be too
much work for you?
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00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:16,908
No work at all.
180
00:06:16,944 --> 00:06:18,304
I'll be the boss, see?
181
00:06:18,328 --> 00:06:20,273
All I do is hand out
the assignments.
182
00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:21,595
My staff does all the work.
183
00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,776
And this way I can make
certain that Agnes Finley
184
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,228
doesn't write the
track meet story.
185
00:06:25,252 --> 00:06:28,019
The deadline for the paper
is right after the track meet.
186
00:06:28,055 --> 00:06:29,949
And that's the night
of the spring mixer.
187
00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:33,475
Don't worry, I ought to be
through by half past 8:00 easy.
188
00:06:35,879 --> 00:06:37,812
Robbie, I'm talking.
189
00:06:37,848 --> 00:06:39,614
Yeah, well, I'm practicing.
190
00:06:39,650 --> 00:06:41,427
Well, that's the best
dance of the year.
191
00:06:41,451 --> 00:06:42,662
We don't want to miss it.
192
00:06:42,686 --> 00:06:44,986
Big deal. Big
senior deal. Mike...
193
00:06:45,021 --> 00:06:47,222
Not a chance. All I
do is edit the paper.
194
00:06:47,257 --> 00:06:49,502
On Friday, after
I finish the 440,
195
00:06:49,526 --> 00:06:52,227
I dash over to school and make
sure my staff is on the beam,
196
00:06:52,262 --> 00:06:54,407
then I dash home, get
dressed, dash over to your place,
197
00:06:54,431 --> 00:06:56,259
pick you up and we
dash to the dance.
198
00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:03,154
Jean, there are too
many children around
199
00:07:03,190 --> 00:07:04,733
to carry on an
intelligent conversation.
200
00:07:04,757 --> 00:07:06,174
I'll talk to you later, okay?
201
00:07:06,210 --> 00:07:07,821
Okay, Mike. Good luck.
202
00:07:07,845 --> 00:07:12,897
You know doubt realize
that I'm the new sports editor.
203
00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:15,217
Mike, is this obsidian?
204
00:07:15,269 --> 00:07:16,584
No, that's tar.
205
00:07:16,637 --> 00:07:18,164
Hey, don't you realize
206
00:07:18,188 --> 00:07:19,353
that I'm breaking the way
207
00:07:19,389 --> 00:07:21,367
so that you guys can
follow in my footsteps?
208
00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:27,479
The lion heeds not the
yapping of the jackals.
209
00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:30,448
Come and see me some
time in my swivel chair.
210
00:07:45,765 --> 00:07:47,832
What's more, our sports page
211
00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:51,519
is going to have
life, zip and novelty.
212
00:07:51,555 --> 00:07:54,939
I don't mean this as any
criticism to my predecessor,
213
00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:59,360
but in the past we have been forced
to suppress our creative instincts.
214
00:07:59,396 --> 00:08:03,331
But in the issue, you're
going to have a chance
215
00:08:03,367 --> 00:08:05,233
to express yourselves.
216
00:08:05,269 --> 00:08:07,369
Really express yourselves.
217
00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:09,404
So right now, let's start having
218
00:08:09,439 --> 00:08:11,573
some of those
good original ideas.
219
00:08:19,399 --> 00:08:21,333
That's a fine suggestion, Mike.
220
00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:22,600
That's right.
221
00:08:22,636 --> 00:08:25,370
This issue has to be unique.
222
00:08:25,405 --> 00:08:28,940
I want something
absolutely compelling.
223
00:08:28,975 --> 00:08:30,725
Now come on, staff, think.
224
00:08:34,414 --> 00:08:38,216
On the baseball field
the mighty batter stood...
225
00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:39,684
What's that?
226
00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:43,188
I-I was just thinking that
poetry might be compelling.
227
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:46,391
You mean the classic
stuff like "Casey at the Bat"?
228
00:08:46,426 --> 00:08:48,026
Oh, no, no.
229
00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:49,560
I mean original poetry.
230
00:08:49,596 --> 00:08:50,979
Some I'd write.
231
00:08:51,014 --> 00:08:52,880
Mm-hmm.
232
00:08:52,915 --> 00:08:54,232
Russ, what are your ideas?
233
00:08:57,771 --> 00:08:58,771
Yes?
234
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:03,708
Come on, think, Russ.
235
00:09:03,743 --> 00:09:05,443
Gee, I don't know, Mike.
236
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:08,246
I have so many other things
on my mind these days,
237
00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:09,748
I just don't have time to think.
238
00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:12,516
I suppose if I do do poetry
239
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:15,387
then that'll leave you without
a story on the track meet.
240
00:09:15,422 --> 00:09:17,789
Oh, the track meet.
241
00:09:17,824 --> 00:09:19,224
Well, you know,
242
00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:22,827
that poetry deal might
not be so bad after all.
243
00:09:22,862 --> 00:09:28,049
Yeah, it's
original... creative...
244
00:09:28,101 --> 00:09:30,702
Yeah, why don't you
give poetry a try this week.
245
00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:32,537
Thank you, Mike.
246
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,016
That's all right. Now, Russ...
247
00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:35,951
Ratter tood... catter, catter...
248
00:09:35,975 --> 00:09:39,822
Catter dood...
Matter? Matter would...
249
00:09:39,846 --> 00:09:43,831
Of course, we can't
go completely arty.
250
00:09:43,867 --> 00:09:46,634
We'll need some
straight reporting, too.
251
00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:48,903
Russ, you'll cover the
track meet on Friday.
252
00:09:48,956 --> 00:09:50,567
Oh, gee, I... Satter...
253
00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:52,958
And there's plenty
of time until then,
254
00:09:52,993 --> 00:09:55,271
so why don't you interview
a couple of the track stars,
255
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:56,761
you know, for the
personality column.
256
00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:58,930
That means a
lot of interviewing,
257
00:09:58,965 --> 00:10:00,326
and I just don't
have the time for that.
258
00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,650
Well, you can get
in a little practice
259
00:10:02,685 --> 00:10:04,936
by interviewing me,
as sort of a dry run.
260
00:10:04,972 --> 00:10:06,282
And that takes care of the page.
261
00:10:06,306 --> 00:10:07,872
Just remember that
everything is due in
262
00:10:07,907 --> 00:10:09,669
Thursday night after school.
263
00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:13,305
Except, of course, for the
story on Friday's track meet.
264
00:10:13,329 --> 00:10:14,329
Any questions?
265
00:10:14,364 --> 00:10:16,881
Oh, gee, I... Meeting adjourned.
266
00:10:18,986 --> 00:10:22,153
Blatter tood... platter could...
267
00:10:22,189 --> 00:10:25,957
Ratter dood...
268
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:48,813
Of course, I'm not too sure
about Agnes and her poetry.
269
00:10:48,848 --> 00:10:51,716
But, uh, don't you think that
was a pretty diplomatic way
270
00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:53,396
to keep her from
writing any more stories
271
00:10:53,420 --> 00:10:54,868
about the track team?
272
00:10:54,905 --> 00:10:58,273
Well, Mike, uh,
273
00:10:58,308 --> 00:11:01,721
Stu Walters used a
different kind of diplomacy.
274
00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,611
Oh?
275
00:11:03,646 --> 00:11:06,380
He had Agnes writing
stories about the track team
276
00:11:06,415 --> 00:11:08,728
to keep her from writing poetry.
277
00:11:08,752 --> 00:11:11,285
See you later, Mike.
278
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:27,451
Gym... gym... gymnasium...
279
00:11:27,486 --> 00:11:31,572
hypertusium... acadasium...
280
00:11:31,608 --> 00:11:34,809
My eyes are burning...
281
00:11:34,844 --> 00:11:39,397
spots on my tongue...
shaky knees...
282
00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:40,748
Oh, I... Oh, yeah?
283
00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:42,762
Then you better
sit down for awhile.
284
00:11:42,786 --> 00:11:44,864
I got to get out to the field.
285
00:11:44,888 --> 00:11:46,799
I missed practice
twice already this week.
286
00:11:46,823 --> 00:11:48,601
And be sure to
interview Stiffy Brothers.
287
00:11:48,625 --> 00:11:50,136
He's great in the shot put.
288
00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:52,593
Stiffy doesn't like me
because Harriet Baker does.
289
00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:55,230
Look, Russ, remember
the power of the press.
290
00:11:55,265 --> 00:11:57,410
Just tell him you're
going to write about him,
291
00:11:57,434 --> 00:11:59,667
and you won't be
able to shut him up.
292
00:11:59,702 --> 00:12:01,902
Oh, hi, Stiffy. Hi, Mike.
293
00:12:03,006 --> 00:12:04,316
36 feet tonight.
294
00:12:04,340 --> 00:12:05,907
Not bad, huh?
295
00:12:05,942 --> 00:12:08,502
You better get some towels.
296
00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:11,462
Hi, Stiffy. How's it going?
297
00:12:11,497 --> 00:12:14,114
Hear you're taking
Harriet to the dance Friday.
298
00:12:14,151 --> 00:12:16,784
Yeah. Say, mind a few questions?
299
00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:17,952
About what?
300
00:12:17,988 --> 00:12:19,720
Writing a story about
you for the Bugle.
301
00:12:19,755 --> 00:12:21,267
Yeah?
302
00:12:21,291 --> 00:12:23,469
Well, what if I don't
want to be written about?
303
00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:25,338
All I want is a few facts.
304
00:12:25,362 --> 00:12:27,194
You know, like what
kind of stuff you eat,
305
00:12:27,230 --> 00:12:28,629
what time you go to bed...
306
00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:30,309
Are you insinuating I've
been breaking training?
307
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:34,001
No. No, look, all I want
to do is find out something
308
00:12:34,037 --> 00:12:35,169
about your personal life.
309
00:12:35,205 --> 00:12:37,183
You leave my
personal life out of this.
310
00:12:37,207 --> 00:12:38,506
This was Mike's idea.
311
00:12:38,542 --> 00:12:40,140
Don't go blaming Douglas now.
312
00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:41,809
Gee, do you have to yell?
313
00:12:41,844 --> 00:12:43,156
Don't tell me to shut up.
314
00:12:43,180 --> 00:12:44,879
This is pretty stupid...
315
00:12:44,914 --> 00:12:46,425
Who are you calling stupid?
316
00:12:46,449 --> 00:12:48,749
Look, I got this
splitting headache!
317
00:12:48,802 --> 00:12:51,169
Yeah? Well, I don't like
a guy that snoops around.
318
00:12:51,204 --> 00:12:53,048
And I don't like
a guy that pries.
319
00:12:53,072 --> 00:12:55,523
And I don't like a guy that
steals another guy's girl.
320
00:12:55,559 --> 00:12:57,737
And I don't like to be
called stupid by any guy
321
00:12:57,761 --> 00:12:59,505
that's so stupid he
thinks he can get away
322
00:12:59,529 --> 00:13:02,089
with telling me to shut up.
323
00:13:03,984 --> 00:13:05,661
The deadline for the
dummy is tomorrow night,
324
00:13:05,685 --> 00:13:07,046
and the paper's out on Monday.
325
00:13:07,070 --> 00:13:09,136
I've got Russ' story right here,
326
00:13:09,172 --> 00:13:11,083
and he'll cover the track
meet tomorrow. No problems.
327
00:13:11,107 --> 00:13:13,052
I finished the feature
column, Mike. Good.
328
00:13:13,076 --> 00:13:14,508
Do you want to hear them?
329
00:13:14,544 --> 00:13:18,179
I got one on football and
baseball and swimming...
330
00:13:18,215 --> 00:13:19,714
That's funny.
331
00:13:19,749 --> 00:13:21,360
And golf and tennis and track.
332
00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:22,283
And what's wrong?
333
00:13:22,335 --> 00:13:23,400
There's nothing here
334
00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:25,686
but the practice
interview with me.
335
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:27,366
Oh, well, I've got
plenty for both columns.
336
00:13:27,390 --> 00:13:29,235
I wonder if he could
have forgotten it.
337
00:13:29,259 --> 00:13:31,003
Here, let me read
you this one on track.
338
00:13:31,027 --> 00:13:32,238
I better call him.
339
00:13:32,262 --> 00:13:36,330
See the sprinter on
the track, cinder track.
340
00:13:36,366 --> 00:13:40,434
Oh, what a world of weariness
to win a wooden plaque.
341
00:13:40,487 --> 00:13:41,730
Yeah. Russ?
342
00:13:41,754 --> 00:13:43,788
This is Mike. Say, listen,
343
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:45,890
what happened to the
personality column?
344
00:13:45,925 --> 00:13:47,803
Did you forget to
put it in the envelope?
345
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:49,226
I gave you everything I wrote.
346
00:13:49,261 --> 00:13:51,090
Well, didn't you even
interview Stiffy Brothers?
347
00:13:51,114 --> 00:13:53,881
Yes, I interviewed
Stiffy Brothers.
348
00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:57,986
As a result, I've gone
into temporary retirement.
349
00:13:58,021 --> 00:13:59,420
What do you mean?
350
00:13:59,455 --> 00:14:01,856
I mean I've got a black eye.
351
00:14:01,891 --> 00:14:05,993
Nobody's gonna see
me with it till it gets better.
352
00:14:06,046 --> 00:14:08,679
But who's gonna
cover the track meet?
353
00:14:08,714 --> 00:14:11,482
If you don't write
this story, who will?
354
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:14,247
Well, you're gonna
be there, aren't you?
355
00:14:14,271 --> 00:14:17,204
The shrieking and the squeaking
356
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:18,839
of the yells!
357
00:14:30,904 --> 00:14:34,571
On the first turn, Mike
Douglas led by five strides.
358
00:14:34,607 --> 00:14:39,610
He swept into the
backstretch six strides ahead.
359
00:14:39,645 --> 00:14:43,781
Four strides. Uh, three.
360
00:14:48,255 --> 00:14:50,288
Mike Douglas,
crack quarter-miler,
361
00:14:50,323 --> 00:14:51,834
was leading at the halfway mark.
362
00:14:51,858 --> 00:14:55,259
Going into the final
turn, he was ahead by...
363
00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:01,515
Mike Douglas, favored
to win the 440 event,
364
00:15:01,550 --> 00:15:04,785
came down the stretch toward
the tape neck-and-neck with...
365
00:15:04,820 --> 00:15:08,255
er, a stride behind...
366
00:15:08,291 --> 00:15:11,242
two... three strides.
367
00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:22,803
Where's he going?
368
00:15:41,224 --> 00:15:45,259
Despite his loss, Mike
Douglas ran a good race.
369
00:15:45,294 --> 00:15:48,129
Despite his loss...
370
00:15:48,164 --> 00:15:54,668
Mike Douglas ran a good race.
371
00:16:19,162 --> 00:16:20,461
Hello, Mr. Loos.
372
00:16:20,496 --> 00:16:22,696
Well, Jean, all set
for the big evening?
373
00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:25,233
I'm set for the last half.
374
00:16:25,268 --> 00:16:26,579
Have you seen Mike?
375
00:16:32,274 --> 00:16:34,208
Oh.
376
00:16:36,079 --> 00:16:37,412
Oh, Jean.
377
00:16:37,447 --> 00:16:39,258
You were supposed to
meet me at the dance.
378
00:16:39,282 --> 00:16:41,416
What are you doing
in your track suit?
379
00:16:41,451 --> 00:16:43,050
Well, I didn't have time.
380
00:16:43,085 --> 00:16:45,019
My clothes are right
down in the locker room.
381
00:16:45,054 --> 00:16:47,087
And as soon as I get
this page put together...
382
00:16:47,123 --> 00:16:48,133
How long?!
383
00:16:48,157 --> 00:16:49,173
Well, not long at all.
384
00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:50,675
Now that this is all in place,
385
00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:52,943
all I do is glue it tight,
proofread the page,
386
00:16:52,979 --> 00:16:54,378
write a small story for there,
387
00:16:54,413 --> 00:16:57,682
and then paste in the
personality column.
388
00:16:57,717 --> 00:17:00,217
I thought you said you
only had to edit the paper?
389
00:17:00,252 --> 00:17:01,864
That your staff
did all the work.
390
00:17:01,888 --> 00:17:02,954
Well, how did I know
391
00:17:02,989 --> 00:17:04,650
half my staff was
gonna run out on me?
392
00:17:04,674 --> 00:17:06,573
You go get dressed.
393
00:17:06,609 --> 00:17:09,627
Who cares if the
paper's a few days late?
394
00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:17,095
You... You promised to take me
395
00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:20,220
to the Spring Hop weeks ago.
396
00:17:24,861 --> 00:17:29,063
Listen, one of
our favorite songs.
397
00:17:33,102 --> 00:17:37,305
Look, Jean, I've been five
hours putting that together.
398
00:17:37,340 --> 00:17:38,650
Now if you'll just be patient
399
00:17:38,674 --> 00:17:39,640
for another 30 minutes.
400
00:17:39,675 --> 00:17:41,092
All right.
401
00:17:41,127 --> 00:17:45,196
And I'll use that 30
minutes finding a partner.
402
00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:46,297
Wait a minute!
403
00:17:46,332 --> 00:17:48,277
There must be a
few stags in the gym.
404
00:18:09,238 --> 00:18:11,338
Oh, Russ, have...
405
00:18:11,373 --> 00:18:13,941
you seen Jean Pearson
within the last hour?
406
00:18:13,976 --> 00:18:17,244
It's all I can do
to see Harriet.
407
00:18:19,248 --> 00:18:22,061
Oh, gee, Mr. Loos, I've been
in there listening to the music,
408
00:18:22,085 --> 00:18:23,729
and I got the most
wonderful inspiration
409
00:18:23,753 --> 00:18:25,030
for a sport poem.
410
00:18:25,054 --> 00:18:26,721
That's a nice experience.
411
00:18:26,756 --> 00:18:28,934
The title of the one
I'm thinking about is
412
00:18:28,958 --> 00:18:33,460
"After the Dance Was
Over, the Dance Was Over."
413
00:18:33,495 --> 00:18:35,062
And it starts out,
414
00:18:35,098 --> 00:18:39,366
"Oh, athletes at the dance,
prance, cha-cha, cha-cha!"
415
00:18:39,401 --> 00:18:40,681
Do you like it?
416
00:18:41,938 --> 00:18:44,249
I-I said, do you like it?
417
00:18:44,273 --> 00:18:47,307
I thought that was
part of the poem.
418
00:18:51,347 --> 00:18:53,347
Hi, Agnes.
419
00:18:53,383 --> 00:18:55,026
I thought you were
going into hiding
420
00:18:55,050 --> 00:18:56,450
till you healed?
421
00:18:56,486 --> 00:18:58,986
I was. But I had a date.
422
00:19:01,391 --> 00:19:03,056
If you can come to the dance,
423
00:19:03,092 --> 00:19:05,521
I don't see why Mike had
to cover the track meet!
424
00:19:11,951 --> 00:19:13,350
There.
425
00:19:13,386 --> 00:19:15,052
You know, without your help,
426
00:19:15,087 --> 00:19:17,187
I don't think I
would have made it.
427
00:19:17,223 --> 00:19:19,390
Now what do we do?
428
00:19:19,425 --> 00:19:22,660
Well, first I paste
everything down,
429
00:19:22,695 --> 00:19:28,032
then I send it to the printers,
and I am through forever.
430
00:19:52,208 --> 00:19:54,541
Gosh, Mike, I'm sorry.
431
00:19:56,445 --> 00:19:58,879
Well, that's it.
432
00:19:58,915 --> 00:20:01,148
I'm licked.
433
00:20:01,183 --> 00:20:03,951
I couldn't get it to
the printers tonight.
434
00:20:03,986 --> 00:20:06,053
We might as well go home.
435
00:20:06,088 --> 00:20:08,033
And not have it
come out on Monday?
436
00:20:08,057 --> 00:20:09,334
Mike, you can't.
437
00:20:09,358 --> 00:20:12,326
Look, Jean, I've ruined
your evening enough.
438
00:20:12,361 --> 00:20:14,089
You have not ruined my evening.
439
00:20:14,113 --> 00:20:16,547
It's been fun working with you.
440
00:20:16,582 --> 00:20:19,666
Besides, there
are three of us now.
441
00:20:19,702 --> 00:20:21,202
These stories are all numbered.
442
00:20:21,237 --> 00:20:23,415
We'll all have them put together
again quicker than you can say
443
00:20:23,439 --> 00:20:24,805
"iambic pentameter."
444
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:28,909
There's still time, and
Mr. Loos will be up later.
445
00:20:36,118 --> 00:20:39,320
All right, once more.
446
00:20:56,989 --> 00:20:57,989
Jean?
447
00:21:00,409 --> 00:21:04,562
Could I, uh... have
the last dance?
448
00:21:12,955 --> 00:21:14,588
On one condition.
449
00:21:14,623 --> 00:21:17,591
What's that?
450
00:21:17,626 --> 00:21:21,012
You take off those spikes.
451
00:21:40,533 --> 00:21:43,834
The dance is a dance...
452
00:21:43,870 --> 00:21:46,904
is a dance is a dance.
453
00:21:46,939 --> 00:21:53,644
Not where, not
why, not even who,
454
00:21:53,679 --> 00:21:59,316
but only when, a
dance is a dance.
455
00:22:12,498 --> 00:22:14,532
Well, there it is, Dad.
456
00:22:14,567 --> 00:22:16,000
I made the deadline.
457
00:22:16,035 --> 00:22:17,434
What do you think of it?
458
00:22:17,469 --> 00:22:20,015
Well, "Mike Douglas
in sensational upset."
459
00:22:20,039 --> 00:22:21,916
You made that up pretty big.
460
00:22:21,940 --> 00:22:23,273
Well, just because
I was editor...
461
00:22:23,309 --> 00:22:24,641
No, I understand.
462
00:22:24,676 --> 00:22:27,222
You had to print the facts
no matter how unpleasant.
463
00:22:27,246 --> 00:22:28,645
Oh, here's one here.
464
00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:30,392
"What Mike Douglas
eats for breakfast."
465
00:22:30,416 --> 00:22:31,626
That's interesting.
466
00:22:31,650 --> 00:22:33,283
Yeah, but that
was the only story
467
00:22:33,319 --> 00:22:35,119
Russ Burton turned in.
468
00:22:35,154 --> 00:22:36,253
Oh, I see.
469
00:22:36,288 --> 00:22:38,622
Uh, who wrote this one
here about Mike Douglas
470
00:22:38,657 --> 00:22:40,975
taking over as guest
editor for a week?
471
00:22:41,010 --> 00:22:43,477
Well, I needed a
little filler for that spot.
472
00:22:43,512 --> 00:22:46,697
And besides, it
is a unique story.
473
00:22:46,732 --> 00:22:49,533
Hmm. Something that
won't happen again, hmm?
474
00:22:49,568 --> 00:22:52,536
That's right, never again.
475
00:22:52,571 --> 00:22:54,704
I mean, it was good
experience and all that,
476
00:22:54,740 --> 00:22:56,791
but I'm sure
glad it's over with.
477
00:22:57,994 --> 00:22:59,905
Here's a poem on the
sport page. That's different.
478
00:22:59,929 --> 00:23:01,962
And what do you know,
it's about Mike Douglas.
479
00:23:01,998 --> 00:23:04,109
That was one of Agnes
Findley's wild ideas.
480
00:23:04,133 --> 00:23:05,710
I had to humor her. Oh.
481
00:23:05,734 --> 00:23:07,084
Hello.
482
00:23:07,119 --> 00:23:09,186
Oh, yes, Mr. Loos.
483
00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:11,589
What'd you think
of the sports page?
484
00:23:11,624 --> 00:23:13,591
"I tried in vain to
search and find
485
00:23:13,626 --> 00:23:15,793
"some words to
rhyme with 'Douglas'
486
00:23:15,828 --> 00:23:17,661
"The only words
that come to mind
487
00:23:17,697 --> 00:23:21,465
are 'wouglas,
youglas, zouglas.'"
488
00:23:21,500 --> 00:23:22,644
But, Mr. Loos...
489
00:23:22,668 --> 00:23:24,501
"How sad it is to bear the name
490
00:23:24,536 --> 00:23:26,704
"the rhymeless name of Douglas,
491
00:23:26,739 --> 00:23:29,339
"No poet can lift
that name to fame
492
00:23:29,374 --> 00:23:31,909
with wouglas, youglas, zouglas."
493
00:23:31,944 --> 00:23:34,211
Thanks, Mr. Loos.
494
00:23:34,246 --> 00:23:36,447
Yeah, bye.
495
00:23:36,482 --> 00:23:39,716
That darn Stu Walters!
496
00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:42,063
Boy, talk about your plum deals!
497
00:23:42,087 --> 00:23:43,370
What did he do?
498
00:23:43,405 --> 00:23:46,806
Oh, he says he's too
busy to be the sports editor,
499
00:23:46,842 --> 00:23:50,094
so Mr. Loos just gave
me the job permanently.
500
00:23:50,129 --> 00:23:51,928
Congratulations, Mike.
501
00:23:51,964 --> 00:23:53,863
You know, there
ought to be some word
502
00:23:53,899 --> 00:23:55,499
that rhymes with "Douglas."
503
00:23:55,534 --> 00:23:56,545
Luckless.
504
00:23:56,569 --> 00:23:58,868
Luckless? Douglas?
505
00:23:58,904 --> 00:24:00,521
That doesn't rhyme very well.
506
00:24:00,556 --> 00:24:02,773
No, but it sure makes sense.
507
00:24:02,808 --> 00:24:04,653
Of course, it'd be all right
if we changed our name.
508
00:24:04,677 --> 00:24:06,777
Luckless Duckless.
509
00:24:06,812 --> 00:24:09,880
Sounds kind of silly, though,
doesn't it... Steve Duckless?
510
00:24:09,915 --> 00:24:11,727
Come home from a lot of
hunting trips that way, I tell you.
511
00:24:11,751 --> 00:24:14,251
Duckless and gooseless.
37084
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