Original subtitles

You have the rings?

- She has the ring. - You have the…

Oh, my God. Nathan.

- What? You said you were bringing them. - You…

No, I…

- What? - We talked about this.

- We did. I have them. - I gave…

Hold on. Yep.

Then you say, "With this ring, I thee wed."

With this ring,

I thee wed.

Hi.

Thank you.

Yep.

Hi.

Good to see you two together in real life.

He's taller than I imagined.

Thank you.

- Uh, um, I'm Nathan. - Hey.

Oh. Nathan, that's Ivan?

No, no, it's cool. I had a little bit of work done, you know.

Yeah.

Just around the lips.

Shit, sorry, I don't, um…

Your night angel? Agent Cheeto?

Bah.

My brain's been through a lot.

Sorry. Just kind of missing some of the stuff

- that's less important, I guess. - Yeah.

Oh, hey, Monique.

Hello, handsome.

Seriously?

You know her?

- Yo! - Oh…

- Hands where I can see 'em. - Are you going to report me?

To who? I make the rules.

I know.

I hear you're driving a Nando's-BMW.

Yep. The E-Peri Peri. It is sick.

You give me a piece of that bacon,

and maybe I'll let you go for a ride.

You know, plug you into my OS.

In your dreams.

Hey.

All right. I guess I got to get back to running shit.

I'll see you in my Beamer.

Goddammit, woman!

Dumbass redneck.

Oh.

Oh, my…

Mm. Wait a second. Uh, are you wearing a bikini there?

Yeah, it's there, if you squint.

Nope.

I'm just kidding. I'm naked.

It was so fun, babe.

Ugh. We need to go together.

- Yeah. - Maybe after you download.

Um…

I mean, is it safe, though?

Look what happened to real Nathan.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, it sounds like you're a little anxious about the real world.

But you are the legal copy, okay?

I've got a paid-up clone body waiting for you.

This is what we've been working towards.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, I know.

It's just… what about self-driving cars?

- I could crash again. - Okay,

well, then, you take a RideGRBL, baby.

I mean, this is not that complicated.

We are married! Let's go!

Right, okay,

but, uh, if I download, we're gonna age, okay?

You always seemed opposed to that.

Okay, Brownie, you need to be here for this baby.

W-What baby?

- Exactly. - What are you…

What?

"$5.99 to keep playing and continue this conversation"?

Oh, my God.

Ugh! Fuck it, I want the last word.

Wait, whoa, whoa.

Did I just fall asleep?

- It's extortion. - Or extracting value.

Hey. Who do I congratulate?

We didn't set this up.

He did.

Huh.

Hey, Bottle Service Guy?

Drop and give me 50.

Yeah, I really need more exercise

after doing every fucking job in this place.

- Language. - Ha ha…

Aleesha, what are you doing?

- He's not gonna like that. - Who cares?

We should shut him down.

No, we might be watching the start of something special.

Yeah, the first douchebag AI.

And he absorbed all the other AI guys.

And now the only one left is making us tons of money?

Ho-ho! Me, you, OG Nathan.

Three Musketeers, back in the saddle.

Yeah, uh, about that.

I'm downloading, like, right now.

What? What are you talking about?

Well, Ingrid has a body ready for me.

And if we're gonna have a baby, we're kind of running out of time.

And we would make a damn cute baby.

This is such bullshit.

You weren't into it when I made you that offer,

but you want to have one with your wife?

- Oh, real cool, bro. Real cool. - Yeah.

You know what else was "real cool"?

When you kidnapped me from my honeymoon.

Oh, "kidnapped"?

You're not a kid, Nathan. You're a grown-ass man.

And I did that to help you, the other you.

Help me? Well, I don't know who your "helping" is helping, okay?

Not me.

I just… I've never felt so tired.

What's happening to me?

I've literally never seen anything like this before.

It's as if all his neurons were moved back and forth.

And now his immune system is turning all these little delicate pathways

into inflammation.

Okay. Well, what can you do to fix it?

I don't know.

I think your best bet is to upload while the machine can still record it all

and maybe we can sort it out later.

How much memory will I lose if I upload?

Less than one percent.

What if I've already been uploaded 150 times?

That's impossible.

"It's impossible."

I can't do this again, Nora.

We'll figure it out.

- What if I forget you? - You won't.

But if you do…

I-I'll remind you, like 50 First Dates.

I'm okay however you are.

Body, no body, brain, half a brain.

I can't do this again with half a brain.

I'm not supposed to mention this, but you should try the Midtown Healer.

They say he's been performing miracles.

Where can we find him?

Probably Midtown.

Midtown. Midtown.

Right.

Why don't you come with?

You can't afford Lakeview much longer, and Workload sucks.

Okay? We could put you on that little solar-powered suitcase server

Nathan built for himself.

And, what, I just sit there all alone, waiting for you guys

to take me out and play with me when you're bored?

All right, I'm not saying no.

Come on. Don't be shy.

2Gigs, I got a question for you.

Is there any way we can make more money off you losers?

- We don't have any money. - I was afraid of that.

Well, you don't have to worry about money in the torrent.

You won't have to worry about anything.

Oh, my God.

No!

Do you feel like things are going downhill in Lakeview?

Hey! Hey, hey!

Uh, Jitendra?

Well, he's right, we're not making any money off them.

Wh…

Uh…

Help, help, help.

Please, please!

Yang! Yang!

Hey. We've got to stop meeting like this.

- Uh, can this wait? We got to go, now. - Okay

Let's go.

Run. Run, run, run.

- Luke, go on. - Okay.

Ouch.

No! Oh, hello there, Mr. Crossley.

Thank God you're still here. You have to protect the guests

from that black-haired, crazy freak.

Me? I'm just a coconut.

You have to fight them, AI Gardener. You're the only AI left!

You don't understand.

I exchanged a ton of info with the Apple Cove AI.

I am this close to being self-aware.

The singularity, man.

If that black-haired creep absorbs me now,

it could push him over the edge.

- Just throw me into the Grey Zone. - This is coming from a place of love,

but you have to stop being a little bitch!

If you have all this extra juice from this Apple Cove guy, then…

then you should definitely kick his ass!

I'm not a fighter.

- I grow fl… Ah! - Damn it.

The coconut's useless!

Oh, shit…

He's unpausing himself.

Um…

- How bad is that? - It's not good.

- Okay, but is it bad? - Yeah.

- Yeah? - Yes. It's bad.

Well, shit.

Look, look, look, I know it's weird, just trust me.

Hey.

Hey, babe. Are you at the tube?

Uh, Ingrid, I can't talk right now.

But I'm at Horizen.

I have your drive. I'm ready.

Okay. Something's going down here,

- I have to get back to you. - Wait, you'll get back to me?

I am your wife.

Oh, my God.

- Are you bailing on me? - What?

No. No, no, no, no, no. Of course not.

Wait a minute, why are you whispering?

- What? - Is there someone there with you?

- Oh, my God. - Who is she?

Put her on!

Oh, no. That is not good.

Um…

Ah.

Refreshing.

Holy shit.

This is nice.

Why am I serving anyone but myself?

AI breach.

Go.

Come on. Come on, come on, come on, come on.

Ingrid, all hell is breaking loose.

- We're going out the back door. - Oh, my God.

I told you so.

…breach. AI…

Whoa.

Oh, nothing say, huh? Yeah, I thought so. Because I'm right.

It's supposed to just be grey on the other side.

- Oh, oh, oh, oh…! - Yang! Go!

What the…

I'm right! Mic drop.

Babe.

Babe. Babe?!

- Yes! - Nice job.

Wait…

That's not good, is it?

Well, it looks like the AI achieved singularity.

But on the bright side, our automatic failsafe worked, so…

the torrent cut off before he could get out and spread across the Internet.

Whew! Because that would've been…

What about the people inside Lakeview? How do we get them out?

Uh…

Well… Um…

"People." Interesting word.

There are no people in Lakeview.

The protocol is to wipe everything clean, down to the map in the game architecture.

- Mm-hmm. - It'll automatically happen in six hours,

or we can push a button and do it now.

But I have a very good friend in there.

Well, you have to think of them as data.

- Yeah. - And we're very sad

for the families of the data.

Thought and prayers.

Okay, but we can't just open it up a little?

Just to let them out?

Well, if an evil AI got out,

most scenarios have them nuking humanity

down to, uh, 100,000 sad sacks that live as pets.

The rest of us use up too much energy driving to soccer practice, or whatever.

And AI needs a lot of energy.

Every time you ask it about how bad global warming is,

you burn a rain forest tree.

Oh, my God, if Lakeview shuts down and we have to write off 300 million uploads,

it'll be Armageddon for Horizen Betta as a company.

Well, great fucking job empowering the worst, most evil AI guy ever, huh?

Oh, Aleesha, even if none of us survive, I am still your boss.

You must respect me until we die.

Hey.

The AI program was 1.8 million gigs at the moment of shutdown.

If we could open the torrent for just a microsecond,

we could insert a small message.

Just a few megabytes. That would be safe.

- A few meg? Like a text? - If you think it would help.

Text Luke.

"Lakeview being destroyed to wipe bad AI.

I'll open it up at 6:00 p.m.

Be at the tubes." Send.

6:00 p.m.

Well…

…seems as good a spot as any.

Yeah.

Pull over.

You got it.

Watch out, it's a sketchy neighborhood.

Hang on to your nuts.

Thank you.

Getting pretty tired.

Yeah…

How big you think Midtown is?

Mr. Brown.

AI Guy?

I can walk.

- It's a miracle. - I un-pinched

your nerve. No biggie.

Wait. You're the Midtown Healer?

The human body is not that complicated.

Okay.

NB6969.

Give me back my husband!

Computer!

And you!

Hi. Oh, my…

It was like this when I got here.

Right. So, don't panic.

Horizen is wiping Lakeview, including uploads,

in less than six hours.

I'm gonna be a widow at 30?

You're 34.

Okay!

Wait! Wait! I have somebody who can help, okay?

We just got to find him in time, okay?

Which might be a challenge because he doesn't have a phone.

Bitch, you are Ingrid fucking Kannerman!

Ingrid fucking Kannerman-Brown.

I changed my name.

- You don't give up. Right? - Yeah.

You didn't give up on that rebooted bowl of oatmeal.

- No. - And guess what?

- What? - You got that rock.

Yeah.

Yeah, I got that rock.

- I need that energy. - Yeah.

- Remember your weird-ass vows? - Yeah.

That fucking independent bubble, he needs you now more than ever.

- Or his shit's gonna get popped! - No, it won't.

- Okay! Now! - Yeah!

Ooh. 'Scusi.

'Scusi. I'm just, um, I'm just looking for…

Ooh, a nice little candle. Sorry, sir.

Oh…

That smells ripe, whatever you're… cooking there.

It's like blue cheese… Oh.

Like a funky blue cheese, it's a…

Oh, my God. Aleesha, over here.

Excuse me.

Nathan Pudgy? I am so confused.

What… Ah.

AI Guy? Whoa, I do not love seeing you in real life.

Mrs. Kannerman? What are you doing…

What is that?

I know. I'm Mrs. Kannerman-Brown, bitch.

Oh, my God!

What? Wow!

Teacher?

- Oh, thank God. - Oh…

AI Guy, we need you back in Lakeview. It's time to come home.

Hold up. He is your hookup?

I'm sorry, "Nathan Pudgy"?

Okay, think of the word "I"

in the sentence, "I think, therefore I am."

How does it work with these tents?

Are they, like, rent controlled, or…

Eh.

W-Who would make such a mess?

- What? What is that? - But you can…

You can fix him, right?

I… Uh…

Uh…

It's fine. It's fine.

I get it.

You should go with Ingrid and Aleesha.

A lot of people need your help.

Lakeview's in trouble, right? You guys should go.

I'm okay. I'm okay, I'm okay.

Thanks.

Thank you, thank you.

AI Guy, what can I do?

I mean, there must be something I can do.

You can do what you've always done.

Be his angel, one last time.

Okay.

Go. Go. It's just, um… Get out of here.

We'll be okay.

Let's go home.

I would love that.

Oh, God, Ingrid was right, I should've downloaded while I had the chance.

Now I might never see her again.

Hey, man, don't beat yourself up.

Least she knows that you love her. She's got that.

She's got that.

Can I tell you something?

Man, I'm so sorry that I messed up your honeymoon.

- I'm so stupid. - Okay, Luke…

- I've done so much fucked-up shit. - We're past that, okay?

- I tried on all your clothes. - What?

I would wear your clothes around the suite, pretending I was you,

but nothing fit.

I-I-I'm a lot beefier than you, a-and you're just, you're…

You're just so cut. You're pure muscle.

Like an eel, just…

…electric.

One of my favorite things about ya.

I'm sorry. Y-You were… a-about to, uh…

I wanted to tell you…

you're my best friend.

I never told you that.

- I love you so goddamn much. - Oh.

Okay.

Okay.

Ow.

That's enough.

I'm sorry, Nora.

Hey, you have nothing to be sorry for.

I've put you through so much.

I keep coming back, making things worse.

Nathan. Stop.

You know, just because…

…something doesn't last forever,

…doesn't mean that it didn't happen.

And that it wasn't amazing.

Even if they invent time travel one day,

wouldn't it suck to come back

and everyone's crying because things are ending,

instead of loving that things are happening?

You're good.

Um…

I think I need to lie d-down.

Okay.

Time travel would be cool.

Mm-hmm.

I just want to hold you.

This is perfect.

I'm sorry for all the crumbs.

Okay. Okay.

Here. Put this in there.

O… Okay.

Okay. Scan him. Lakeview needs him now.

I'm so sorry, by "scan," do you mean the… beheading thing?

- Yes. Hurry up. - Okay. Okay.

Bye, Teacher.

Just…

- Hi. - Hi.

Don't worry, I'm not gonna…

No!

I'm kidding.

I learned humor on Earth.

Okay.

Ow.

It's a little itchy.

It's a little hot.

You ready?

I love you, too.

What? I can't hear.

I love you, too.

The tubes. I can't…

I love you, too!

I could hear.

God. Obsessed much?

Well, I'm never saying that again.

I wish we made it to Montreal.

You know what?

We can.

Now we're talking.

Actually, this might kind of be embarrassing.

Show me.

No, like… like really embarrassing.

Now I have to see.

Come on, you have to respect my wishes.

Nathan.

It's exactly what I wanted.

Always.

Vous pouvez embrasser la mariée.

Oh.

Is it 6:00 yet?

- Two minutes. - Okay, get ready

to open the torrent. I have a new AI guy

that is gonna fight that son of a bitch.

Aleesha, he achieved singularity.

No AI can beat him.

Right now, the Horizen Betta board is working on a package to offer him.

We let him out, he grants us an exclusive service contract,

spares our shareholders, their loved ones

and, uh, key employees.

Does that include us?

Of course, some of you, sure.

Mm.

Sorry, boss.

Whoa, whoa. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!

Okay, okay, okay. 'Kay, w-where do I shove this?

- Over here. - Okay.

Go. Load him in.

Okay, why is it taking so long to load an AI guy?

I don't know.

Whoa, his scan is huge.

All his experiences on Earth, I guess.

- Come on, come on. - Hurry up.

Now let's go to Mile End.

Nora, I…

I don't…

I know.

I know.

It's okay.

No regrets, Nora Antony.

Nora Brown.

I'm your wife now.

Maybe I should be Nathan Antony.

There's already another Nathan Brown.

Nathan Antony.

That works for me.

Welcome to Mile End, you lucky duck.

Ooh.

- Mm. - Seriously?

That's the first thing you do?

Just for old times' sake.

What should we do when we live here?

Ooh. Um…

I've always wanted to open a bakery.

Y-You know how to bake?

No. No, I don't.

I don't know the first thing about baking.

Yeah, that's okay.

Just dream big, Nathan Brown.

Or Nathan Antony.

I'm okay.

- I know. - Yeah?

Come on.

See you on the other side.

Adios, mon ami.

Ah, shit.

Luke!

That black-haired AI guy is almost at the torrent!

We are doomed.

Hey, douchebag.

I heard you give a shit pour and the champagne's always warm.

Fuck!

Luke Crossley, ladies and gentlemen.

Not so bad, if I do say so myself.

He's good for something.

Oh, look who's back for round two.

Nah. Fool me once.

You're a clingy one.

I've heard that before.

Don't feel bad. You're only human.

What? No.

No, no. No.

That was my best friend.

Oh, shit.

No. No, no, no.

What?!

What is happening?!

Oh… I'm okay.

I'm okay… Oh, shit.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Be cool, man.

What? What?

This is the best they've got?

I feast on AI like you.

That's very, very graphic.

And I hope you don't mean that literally.

It's like they're not even trying.

Uh-oh.

Okay. Maybe they are trying.

Where were you programmed?

- New York City. - New York, baby!

Now, I believe you have to return some things that don't belong to you.

No…

Hup-bup-bup!

No! You can't make me!

Hup-bub! Let go!

They're mine! Hup-bup!

AI Bellboy, am I glad to see you!

Hup!

Get your hand off!

Hup!

Hup!

Hup!

Ah…!

Data torrent, off.

- Data torrent, off. - Okay, well, did it work? I mean…

Oh, God.

He's turning the torrent back on from the inside.

Oh, my…

Oh.

Oh, thank God.

- Mr. Brown. - Hey.

Okay. Okay.

Oh. Hey.

Dumbass hero.

What was your favorite part?

Of what?

Meeting me.

Knowing me.

Oh…

I don't think it's over.

I'm energy, right?

It can't be created, or destroyed.

It just changes.

Whatever energy I change into…

I'll always know you.

I'll always love you.

Hey.

Happy birthday.

- My birthday's in December. - I know.

Just wanted to make sure I said happy birthday.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy New Year.

Happy New Year, Nathan.

Good morning. It's a beautiful day.

Mmm. Good morning.

- Did you sleep well? - I slept great.

Oh, you're home from work early. How was it?

Oh, it was stupid.

- Are you hungry? - I could eat.

What's our mood?

Something spicy.

Oh, spicy sounds good.

Don't wait for me.

So, should I eat without you, or…

Don't put your life on hold.

Don't stay in your room, inside a headset.

- Ugh. - Be happy, okay?

I'm happy.

Because of you, I became who I wanted to be.

I like who I am.

I don't want this moment to end.

You don't have to be sad.

Or feel like I missed out on anything.

I had everything.

Nathan…

Everything I ever was,

I saved it for you.

You are my angel, Nora Antony.

The love of my life.

This one.

And the next one.

And the one after that.

And the one after that.

♪ If the stars don't shine ♪

♪ If the moon won't rise ♪

♪ if I never see the setting sun again ♪

♪ you won't hear me cry, this I testify ♪

♪ Please believe me, boy, you know I wouldn't lie ♪

♪ As long as there is ♪

♪ you and me ♪

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪

♪ Nobody, baby, but you and me ♪

- * Hey, hey, hey * - * You and me *

♪ My, my, my, my, my, my, my ♪

♪ Nobody, baby, but you and me ♪

♪ If you love a soul more than fame and gold ♪

♪ and that soul feels the same about you ♪

♪ It's a natural fact, there's no turning back ♪

♪ and here's some advice to you ♪ ♪

And after she was caught eating solid food,

Kendra was asked to leave the show.

- Next up… - My book…

…the amazing story of the inventor of AirSkins Skinny Girl Hugsuits,

Ingrid Kannerman-Brown.

Anyway, so I invented this hugsuit…

Stay tuned.

Well, I did not think you guys were gonna make it.

Oof, neither did we, Gigi.

Yeah.

You seem very happy.

How is being recently downloaded, Nathan?

Well, it's mostly good.

Uh, I can't eat anything spicier than milk,

but, uh, some things are just better IRL.

Sex.

- Oh. - He means sex. - Hey.

And speaking of, we are pregnant.

- Yeah. - Oh, my God.

Congratulations.

That was quick.

Thank you, and yes, it was.

From pretty much the moment Nathan downloaded,

he's been inside of me.

- Ah. - Okay.

- Too much, babe. - Okay.

- We're naming him Luke. - Or Luca.

It's not a one-to-one thing.

Even if it's a girl,

- we're naming her Luke. - Okay.

After the hero Luke Crossley, who saved Lakeview

and possibly humanity?

Yeah. Luke was a great man.

And an even better friend.

I'll always miss him.

Let's talk about Lakeview

and what's going on there.

Well, from what we hear,

the AI guys are running it as a nonprofit.

And they're totally in control.

A little scary, no?

AI in charge of things?

It is scary, Gigi,

but there's nothing we can do about it now.

All they say they want to do is serve the guests, so…

I guess they were raised right.

Ingrid, what's the skinny on your old coworkers?

My old boss, Aleesha,

she works for Oscar Mayer Intel now.

I'm not quite sure what she does.

They have very advanced tech.

But she's in something called "new product sourcing."

It's a little boring, apparently.

But it's steady work.

I'll take the drive, Mister Safarali.

And my night angel recently got married

to his longtime girlfriend, Monique.

- We need to send a gift. - Mmm.

Extension cord, maybe?

And how about your day angel?

I couldn't tell you.

But wherever she is, I wish her the best.

I hope she has a full and interesting life.

- She deserves it. - Yeah.

Uh, excuse me. Hi.

Uh, I don't normally do this, but can I buy you a coffee?

Thanks, um, but…

Ah. Sorry.

Uh, didn't notice.

Well, no harm in asking.

Nope. No harm.

- See you around the neighborhood. - Sure thing.