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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,291 --> 00:00:05,709 Let them see the miracle the small and the grand, 2 00:00:05,829 --> 00:00:10,035 The honest soul I myself am. 3 00:00:10,155 --> 00:00:13,266 - Bendeguz 4 00:00:39,131 --> 00:00:43,059 Poor old Steve Cobbler devoted himself to patching up boots and shoes 5 00:00:43,095 --> 00:00:45,536 and other leaky footwear which existed in the world. 6 00:00:45,656 --> 00:00:48,270 He worked day and night, nearly breaking his back. 7 00:00:48,530 --> 00:00:51,546 But he didn't content himself with his trade. 8 00:00:51,666 --> 00:00:54,825 Instead, he descended into writing poetry with his old noggin. 9 00:00:55,149 --> 00:00:57,310 I've learnt by heart his most beautiful poem: 10 00:00:57,430 --> 00:01:00,475 Black eagle, muddy street, Steve Cobbler lives here. 11 00:01:00,499 --> 00:01:03,687 Steve Cobbler's piss weasle, both aren't worth a red cent. 12 00:01:04,018 --> 00:01:08,002 Red cent? Your damn sorrowful mother, you rascal! 13 00:01:16,126 --> 00:01:21,084 It's true I'm only a young man, so I was never really successful in anything. 14 00:01:21,433 --> 00:01:25,546 However sad and strange the things that happened to me were, they were the height of folly. 15 00:01:25,858 --> 00:01:28,685 They said I was a child prodigy. 16 00:01:28,805 --> 00:01:31,898 And that I would've been hanged at the gallows at two days old 17 00:01:32,018 --> 00:01:35,442 as I'd never be an honest man, this way or that. 18 00:01:35,836 --> 00:01:39,563 Even my mum had suggested to twist my neck. 19 00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:41,326 Preferably sooner than later. 20 00:01:41,446 --> 00:01:45,383 Had I received a letter, it would've been addressed to me. 21 00:01:45,485 --> 00:01:49,062 To Master Bendeguz, Black Eagle Street. 22 00:01:49,182 --> 00:01:50,275 Delivered into his own hand. 23 00:02:16,850 --> 00:02:21,641 How many times have I told you? You must go straight, because sooner or later the devil will take you. 24 00:02:22,014 --> 00:02:26,461 I would go straight, mum, but that wouldn't go too well in the country. 25 00:02:27,050 --> 00:02:30,143 That cobbler was such a crafty old rascal 26 00:02:30,263 --> 00:02:34,562 that he never threw out the pair of the shoes I needed. 27 00:02:35,154 --> 00:02:39,394 So I only had mismatched shoes, as well as he. 28 00:02:43,677 --> 00:02:46,863 HUNGARIAN TELEVISION PRESENTS 29 00:02:49,021 --> 00:02:53,318 THE WATCHMAN'S HOUSE IS MOVING 30 00:02:54,821 --> 00:02:59,032 BASED ON THE NOVEL BY SÁNDOR RIDEG 31 00:03:00,252 --> 00:03:02,138 SCREENPLAY EDITING 32 00:03:03,004 --> 00:03:04,426 CAST 33 00:03:05,565 --> 00:03:10,077 IMRE OLVASZTÓ as Bendeguz 34 00:03:11,630 --> 00:03:14,131 RÓBERT KOLTAI as THE WATCHMAN 35 00:03:15,613 --> 00:03:16,833 SHAGGY 36 00:03:18,476 --> 00:03:20,574 TERI HORVÁTH as THE WITCH 37 00:03:21,733 --> 00:03:23,034 ALEX THE HORSE 38 00:03:24,234 --> 00:03:27,028 PÉTER HAUMANN as THE HORSE DEALER 39 00:03:28,631 --> 00:03:30,729 PIROSKA MOLNÁR as MUM 40 00:03:31,742 --> 00:03:33,759 ZÁCH JÁNOS as THE SHOEMAKER 41 00:03:35,171 --> 00:03:37,188 LÁSZLÓ CUCZOR as THE PEASANT 42 00:03:38,196 --> 00:03:40,581 ILDIKÓ PÉCSI as ROSIE KNOCKNEED 43 00:03:41,973 --> 00:03:44,494 LÁSZLÓ BÁNHIDY as UNCLE SPOIL 44 00:03:45,814 --> 00:03:48,214 ISTVÁN SZILÁGYI as THE LEECH MAN 45 00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:51,602 CSÁKÁNYI LÁSZLÓ as JOSEPH CANE 46 00:03:52,652 --> 00:03:55,445 KÁROLY GYULAI as THE COW DEALER 47 00:03:56,565 --> 00:03:58,370 THE GENDARMES: ANTAL FARKAS 48 00:03:59,544 --> 00:04:01,279 and GÁBOR KARSÁNYI 49 00:04:13,704 --> 00:04:17,249 Dear God, lo is the devil. 50 00:04:30,058 --> 00:04:31,054 What's the matter? 51 00:04:31,703 --> 00:04:34,100 There there! 52 00:04:36,591 --> 00:04:37,757 Cough, cough. 53 00:04:39,919 --> 00:04:41,433 Ohh... 54 00:04:41,875 --> 00:04:46,011 It was a meatloaf as big as my fist. Its end still sits in my throat. 55 00:04:47,802 --> 00:04:49,061 Goodday Joey. 56 00:04:49,181 --> 00:04:52,590 This is my son. I believe he'll be a good cow herder. 57 00:04:53,075 --> 00:04:55,247 He's as fit as a horse. 58 00:04:55,538 --> 00:04:58,142 I'll take him this very day. 59 00:05:01,170 --> 00:05:03,050 I'll stick this into that foul devil. 60 00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:05,448 Bendeguz, you know how hard it is for us. 61 00:05:07,412 --> 00:05:09,970 You don't need to go today. You'll have time tomorrow morning. 62 00:05:11,862 --> 00:05:13,213 Art thou my true mother? 63 00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:16,795 That you may give your own son to the devil? 64 00:05:17,030 --> 00:05:18,872 The devil? Rubbish, the devil! 65 00:05:18,885 --> 00:05:20,603 He's a horse dealer from CsĂ©pa. 66 00:05:21,550 --> 00:05:23,265 There's a hoof on his foot! 67 00:05:23,314 --> 00:05:25,040 There's no hoof at all! 68 00:05:25,428 --> 00:05:28,256 One of his legs is crippled. Come speak to him, you'll see he's a good soul. 69 00:05:29,252 --> 00:05:30,409 Come on! 70 00:05:30,794 --> 00:05:32,834 Come on, or I'll take you out myself. 71 00:05:33,492 --> 00:05:34,413 At last! 72 00:05:36,895 --> 00:05:38,785 Come here, lad. 73 00:05:38,905 --> 00:05:40,637 74 00:05:41,474 --> 00:05:44,388 Don't touch me, else I'll smite you this instant! 75 00:05:44,749 --> 00:05:48,122 I won't let you rend me, otherwise I shall stage a massacre. 76 00:05:49,002 --> 00:05:50,894 Furthermore, you have to leave my seat. 77 00:05:50,959 --> 00:05:53,233 Go sit on the bench, or wherever you want! 78 00:05:53,599 --> 00:05:56,403 But I'm sure you will not sit in my seat, this I guarantee. 79 00:05:56,523 --> 00:06:00,510 Where I come from, a child is treated like a dog. 80 00:06:00,630 --> 00:06:04,003 I'll take you to a decent place. 81 00:06:04,038 --> 00:06:06,192 You'll live just like His Majesty. 82 00:06:06,235 --> 00:06:08,303 Beaked turkeys will fly in the air. 83 00:06:08,332 --> 00:06:10,981 It's not I who needs your help, but Taylor the gate-keeper. 84 00:06:11,014 --> 00:06:14,329 If I have a little money, I soon squander it on drink. I don't conceal this fact. 85 00:06:14,449 --> 00:06:16,848 You could hardly conceal the fact 86 00:06:17,391 --> 00:06:19,991 as your nose is as purple as a smoking pipe. 87 00:06:20,111 --> 00:06:25,206 Based on your hoof I wouldn't think so, but your nose reveals something human. 88 00:06:25,326 --> 00:06:28,628 You'll bless me for assigning you to such a good place. 89 00:06:28,748 --> 00:06:33,299 Indeed I'll bless you, that thunder would burn you from head to foot. 90 00:06:33,419 --> 00:06:37,412 Because of you my mother became untrue to me. 91 00:06:38,355 --> 00:06:39,956 Where's my father's hat? 92 00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:49,431 Don't mourn me, my mother, if I were to die! 93 00:06:50,350 --> 00:06:54,586 - I'll get two pounds for you tomorrow. - Really? Do you trade people too? 94 00:06:54,706 --> 00:06:59,068 Ah, rubbish. Only by chance, should someone ask it of me. 95 00:06:59,188 --> 00:07:03,356 If you don't like the service, just escape with your wits! 96 00:07:03,391 --> 00:07:06,143 Free your spirit, but don't let it get to your head. 97 00:07:06,263 --> 00:07:10,121 In three days, I'll sell you once more to the neighbour. 98 00:07:10,403 --> 00:07:12,305 To hell with that stupid watchman. 99 00:07:12,425 --> 00:07:16,426 - Are you taking me to the watchman? - Well, yes! Taylor the watchman...oh god...ouch... 100 00:07:16,814 --> 00:07:18,164 My legs are nearly frozen! 101 00:07:18,284 --> 00:07:20,630 Glad to hear it. Just let them freeze. 102 00:07:20,750 --> 00:07:22,972 I'll leave you like that. It'll be a pleasure to see. 103 00:07:23,092 --> 00:07:24,807 Aren't your legs freezing? 104 00:07:24,849 --> 00:07:27,911 No way! I'm not of such kin. 105 00:07:27,971 --> 00:07:29,528 Don't get any such idea. 106 00:07:29,648 --> 00:07:32,185 We'll arrive soon to where I left the horses. 107 00:07:32,474 --> 00:07:34,722 Legs don't freeze on horseback. 108 00:07:36,230 --> 00:07:38,461 I'm afraid he won't die for my sake. 109 00:07:45,813 --> 00:07:46,672 Ouch... 110 00:07:47,736 --> 00:07:49,955 This old nag is cutting me in two! 111 00:07:50,625 --> 00:07:52,338 What's the matter? What's wrong, Bendeguz? 112 00:07:52,365 --> 00:07:54,169 What're you scratching for? Do you have fleas? 113 00:07:54,217 --> 00:07:57,566 114 00:07:54,217 --> 00:07:57,566 This horse is busted up! I won't sit on it's back any more! 115 00:07:57,938 --> 00:07:59,544 There's blood all over my pants. 116 00:07:59,559 --> 00:08:03,097 No such thing, Bendeguz! Taylor the watchman is waiting for us. Hey! 117 00:08:03,217 --> 00:08:04,026 Giddyup! Giddyup! 118 00:08:04,044 --> 00:08:06,199 Tell me where he lives! I'll go on foot! 119 00:08:06,488 --> 00:08:08,181 I'll get there, sometime. 120 00:08:08,301 --> 00:08:09,155 Yah! 121 00:08:11,660 --> 00:08:14,990 Come on! You no-good...! 122 00:08:15,110 --> 00:08:18,557 Giddyup! Oh...oh... 123 00:08:19,039 --> 00:08:21,670 Alex! My dear Alex! 124 00:08:21,790 --> 00:08:24,839 Don't...don't...A...A...A... 125 00:08:24,959 --> 00:08:30,187 - Aleeeeex! - Hop off it! 126 00:08:30,222 --> 00:08:33,022 My dear Alex, ohh... 127 00:08:33,142 --> 00:08:35,212 Why are you doing this to me?! 128 00:08:35,266 --> 00:08:37,345 Oh my... 129 00:08:37,615 --> 00:08:40,656 Oh! Oh! 130 00:08:40,776 --> 00:08:43,040 Gracious heaven! 131 00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:47,820 He has dropped dead! Oh my dear lord! 132 00:08:47,940 --> 00:08:51,262 Please don't do this to me! He has died... 133 00:08:51,382 --> 00:08:54,225 My precious love has died... 134 00:08:54,345 --> 00:08:56,775 Horsie...my little horsie... 135 00:08:57,295 --> 00:09:01,566 Oh, my only sweetheart has died... 136 00:09:06,092 --> 00:09:09,967 If I could at least take his skin! 137 00:09:10,190 --> 00:09:13,990 But I haven't even my pocket knife on me. 138 00:09:14,250 --> 00:09:19,087 It was also stolen the other day, when I was a drunken bastard. 139 00:09:19,207 --> 00:09:22,574 Bendeguz, have you a pocket knife? Or... 140 00:09:22,694 --> 00:09:25,028 Rubbish, a pocket knife! Who do you think I am? 141 00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:28,821 We're somewhere outside of the town. 142 00:09:29,079 --> 00:09:32,226 Go on! You'll reach the watchman's house in half an hour. 143 00:09:32,346 --> 00:09:35,748 Oh...bring me a knife or blade from Taylor the watchman! 144 00:09:35,781 --> 00:09:38,090 The horseskin is the most precious thing! 145 00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:42,280 If I can sell it, I can buy a brand new horse with the money. 146 00:09:42,316 --> 00:09:45,989 My dear young man, bring me the watchman's pocket knife! 147 00:09:46,027 --> 00:09:49,363 Until then I won't move from here. 148 00:09:50,250 --> 00:09:54,908 Alright, just wait here! I'll come back sometime! 149 00:09:55,202 --> 00:10:01,749 Horsie...horsie...ohhh... 150 00:10:04,540 --> 00:10:07,514 You'll see a pocket knife, when I bring you one! 151 00:10:08,444 --> 00:10:10,735 So you'll sit by your horse for a long time. 152 00:10:15,169 --> 00:10:19,000 Hey kid! Why aren't you walking straight? Perhaps you're crippled? 153 00:10:20,257 --> 00:10:23,348 You look just as if you were cut from the rope at the gallows. 154 00:10:23,468 --> 00:10:25,551 On the contrary, I'm in good health. 155 00:10:26,411 --> 00:10:29,305 I only rode a lot, but I wasn't born a knight. 156 00:10:29,425 --> 00:10:31,237 And where's the horse dealer? 157 00:10:31,357 --> 00:10:34,705 One of his horses became hungry, so he let it graze under the poplar trees. 158 00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:35,909 What's your name? 159 00:10:35,955 --> 00:10:38,113 Bendeguz Fable is my given name. 160 00:10:38,752 --> 00:10:42,784 Well, Bendeguz my son, go and draw water for the cows. 161 00:10:43,318 --> 00:10:45,387 Did I say that I'd take the job? 162 00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:48,313 Right! Think it over! You'll get six pounds for a quarter year. 163 00:10:48,348 --> 00:10:50,091 Six pounds? Oh my... 164 00:10:50,141 --> 00:10:54,119 Such money hasn't been seen by my father, my mother, nor even by the king himself! 165 00:10:54,437 --> 00:10:56,857 I'll be a rich man, sooner or later. 166 00:11:23,157 --> 00:11:25,610 Gracious heaven. A witch! 167 00:11:28,577 --> 00:11:32,073 Such an ugly creature doesn't even exist in the almanac! 168 00:11:32,528 --> 00:11:34,908 Here! Here's your lunch! 169 00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:39,415 Don't brood over it for hours, finicking as if you were some respectable man! 170 00:11:41,104 --> 00:11:45,525 Why are you gawking, you ass? Perhaps you're deaf? Villain! 171 00:11:48,346 --> 00:11:50,711 Please, let me speak milady! 172 00:11:52,694 --> 00:11:55,520 I scarcely hear you, as I'm eating right now. 173 00:11:56,047 --> 00:11:59,329 Does it please you to see my ears turn? 174 00:12:00,615 --> 00:12:04,310 Would it hurt your tongue to call me: Your Ladyship? 175 00:12:04,952 --> 00:12:09,870 I wouldn't care if you called yourself a happy young brideswoman, you old bat! 176 00:12:09,990 --> 00:12:16,402 Old bat? Keep your filthy city mouth shut, or I'll kick your face in and teach you respect! 177 00:12:16,522 --> 00:12:18,684 Stop, you city scoundrel! 178 00:12:18,721 --> 00:12:22,275 Had only your arm broken off, when you lotted so little a lunch! 179 00:12:22,752 --> 00:12:26,112 You! You cursed city scoundrel! 180 00:12:31,978 --> 00:12:37,670 That's over with. From the first day I was bound into friendship with this vile witch. 181 00:12:39,851 --> 00:12:43,408 No problem! We'll collect weeds, and eat those for lunch. 182 00:12:56,082 --> 00:12:58,981 Goddamn you for your mother! 183 00:13:04,374 --> 00:13:06,583 That rotten witch! 184 00:13:08,507 --> 00:13:11,833 Hm...good goddammit! 185 00:13:18,489 --> 00:13:21,684 Come on! 186 00:13:21,804 --> 00:13:23,189 Don't rush them! 187 00:13:23,309 --> 00:13:25,448 Come on! Damn you! 188 00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:28,275 Come on! Gemma! Go down! 189 00:13:28,516 --> 00:13:30,172 Come on! 190 00:13:30,292 --> 00:13:33,717 Damn your unholy face! 191 00:13:33,727 --> 00:13:36,027 Stop! Stop, you son-of-a-bitch! 192 00:13:36,057 --> 00:13:40,276 Stop, goddamn you! I'll burn the skin off your face! 193 00:13:40,300 --> 00:13:44,662 You left me weeping back there! 194 00:14:14,367 --> 00:14:17,225 Mister watchman! Has she left already? 195 00:14:17,262 --> 00:14:19,082 Yes, she has. You can come out. 196 00:14:24,841 --> 00:14:28,592 You, Bendeguz! Why didn't you tell me that the horse dealer sent a message? 197 00:14:28,712 --> 00:14:31,995 I didn't think it was that important, since Christmas is still long way off. 198 00:14:32,115 --> 00:14:35,180 I like this! 199 00:14:36,534 --> 00:14:38,480 Christmas is still long way off...you rascal! 200 00:14:39,316 --> 00:14:42,430 - What've you done with my cows? - I just took them grazing. 201 00:14:42,550 --> 00:14:46,368 Look at them! Their bellies look as if they've caved in! 202 00:14:46,394 --> 00:14:48,141 And how are their udders? 203 00:14:48,780 --> 00:14:53,650 They must be grazed so that they become as thick as pregnant. 204 00:14:53,770 --> 00:14:55,232 Where's the problem at? 205 00:14:55,352 --> 00:14:56,872 There are few weeds in their bellies. 206 00:14:56,890 --> 00:14:58,417 What if there was only so much in the pasture? 207 00:14:58,537 --> 00:15:01,739 Then take them somewhere else. I don't care. 208 00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:05,274 Take them to a place where alfalfa swells. 209 00:15:05,394 --> 00:15:07,399 I don't care where you take them. 210 00:15:07,519 --> 00:15:10,816 - Okay, I see now. - At last! 211 00:15:11,030 --> 00:15:16,428 I would've been perfectly happy, if the good God had forgotten to create peasants. 212 00:15:16,468 --> 00:15:18,740 They've ruined my life. 213 00:15:18,776 --> 00:15:22,409 I sometimes spent long hours in miserable chase 214 00:15:22,529 --> 00:15:24,748 to escape the punishment. 215 00:15:24,868 --> 00:15:27,399 Which even would've cost money, if I were caught. 216 00:15:27,519 --> 00:15:30,311 The swellings only multiplied on my head. 217 00:15:30,431 --> 00:15:33,009 Because everyone hit my head, whoever could. 218 00:15:33,129 --> 00:15:38,308 It was that way at every lucky grazing, so I had to run as fast as I could. 219 00:15:38,428 --> 00:15:41,779 I hit the cow and the peasant hit me. 220 00:15:52,482 --> 00:15:57,663 I did a lot of thinking because of such things. I was sometimes ashamed of the affair. 221 00:15:57,783 --> 00:16:01,963 At first, I thought I might write my memoirs into a book. 222 00:16:02,083 --> 00:16:05,389 But the things that happened to me were so outlandish they were unbelievable. 223 00:16:05,509 --> 00:16:09,513 Furthermore, the dogs would've torn me apart if it ever saw the light of day 224 00:16:09,633 --> 00:16:12,637 what I experienced around the watchman's house. 225 00:16:12,757 --> 00:16:16,030 Finally I agreed that I'd say whatever I could. 226 00:16:16,150 --> 00:16:19,881 I would teach my grandchildren, should I ever sire a family. 227 00:16:20,001 --> 00:16:24,355 So I'll write my memoirs, so whoever wishes shall see. 228 00:16:24,637 --> 00:16:28,394 For such a genuine truth to come to light is a rarity. 229 00:16:38,337 --> 00:16:42,435 Dear me! God help me! 230 00:16:53,215 --> 00:16:56,737 This foul witch cooked just for me. 231 00:16:57,157 --> 00:16:59,505 Is thy soup thick as well? 232 00:17:00,210 --> 00:17:02,276 Thick. 233 00:17:02,854 --> 00:17:05,287 Especially with this stag beetle. 234 00:17:07,410 --> 00:17:12,190 What a godsend! You even got a stag-beetle. 235 00:17:14,749 --> 00:17:16,872 Save it for me, mister watchman. 236 00:17:18,628 --> 00:17:22,057 Eh? Look what you have to deal with. 237 00:17:26,392 --> 00:17:28,834 Let's close our eyes, and eat like that. 238 00:17:33,235 --> 00:17:36,438 Hey! Get up, you bed bug! 239 00:17:36,558 --> 00:17:38,336 The sun shines upon you! 240 00:17:39,994 --> 00:17:45,207 Until I fell into a miserable pit, there still lived in me a hope that one day I'd be a famous man. 241 00:17:45,927 --> 00:17:49,993 But now that I was in the watchman's house, I had definitely been snared into a trap. 242 00:17:50,462 --> 00:17:54,366 But what beautiful plans I had, if I think about it. 243 00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:08,390 In these parts, every watermelon was designed just for me. 244 00:18:08,510 --> 00:18:11,766 Unfortunately the landowner here was a primitive barbarian too. 245 00:18:11,886 --> 00:18:16,272 He seizes you by the collar before you can look around, and your fate's sealed. 246 00:18:16,668 --> 00:18:19,020 I've learnt the methods of pursuit by heart. 247 00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:24,245 I just had to take care that they not take any of the cows for evidence. 248 00:18:24,715 --> 00:18:29,294 I'm bold to say, that I would've enriched the world with great ideas 249 00:18:30,210 --> 00:18:34,085 had I not forgotten them in the meantime. 250 00:18:35,130 --> 00:18:36,926 Don't hurt me! 251 00:18:51,326 --> 00:18:52,465 There! 252 00:18:54,530 --> 00:18:56,140 Woah! 253 00:18:56,598 --> 00:18:59,569 But why? Why have you withheld half my lunch? 254 00:18:59,689 --> 00:19:02,281 Did you not leave half your food here yesterday, too? 255 00:19:02,401 --> 00:19:05,170 It was I who had to collect the nibbled up scraps. 256 00:19:05,290 --> 00:19:06,755 We're really poor people! 257 00:19:06,875 --> 00:19:09,925 There's no wasting, no squandering here! None! None! 258 00:19:10,045 --> 00:19:12,121 If you don't like it, give this back as well. 259 00:19:12,241 --> 00:19:14,857 Now you'll learn how to be decent. 260 00:19:14,977 --> 00:19:17,733 There's no shoemaker here who'll move away because of you! 261 00:19:17,853 --> 00:19:20,551 I'll teach you what your mother could not! 262 00:19:20,671 --> 00:19:23,452 To hell with you, I say! 263 00:19:24,990 --> 00:19:28,665 - May your arm wither away, curse you! - To hell with you! 264 00:19:28,785 --> 00:19:31,495 You sick bastard! 265 00:19:31,870 --> 00:19:34,794 That devil of a foul witch! 266 00:19:39,080 --> 00:19:40,630 Listen here, Gemma! 267 00:19:41,243 --> 00:19:44,531 As I have nobody besides you in this whole wide world 268 00:19:44,651 --> 00:19:46,140 I'll swear an oath to you. 269 00:19:46,492 --> 00:19:50,566 This moment I swear, hope to die, that I'll have my revenge on the watchman's house. 270 00:19:51,036 --> 00:19:54,617 On the watchman himself, but especially on this foul witch! 271 00:19:56,566 --> 00:19:58,868 Look, a purse! 272 00:20:02,108 --> 00:20:04,821 If only it happened like in the fairy tales. 273 00:20:05,145 --> 00:20:07,230 Surely I'd be a rich man. 274 00:20:11,337 --> 00:20:14,836 I'll leave the watchman's house as Saint Paul left the Wallachians. 275 00:20:14,956 --> 00:20:17,666 I won't bid farewell to the witch, especially. 276 00:20:18,053 --> 00:20:21,200 Thank heaven, I'm an honest gatherer now. 277 00:20:22,809 --> 00:20:27,494 I wouldn't give it back to its owner, even if he were to come begging before me on two crutches. 278 00:20:27,799 --> 00:20:30,312 I'll strut along in a feathered helmet with a rifle. 279 00:20:30,432 --> 00:20:33,682 And I'll put a bullet in every peasant's hindquarters. 280 00:20:33,802 --> 00:20:37,016 I'll hire that lousy watchman as a cow herder. 281 00:20:37,136 --> 00:20:41,595 But if I hear even the smallest complaint, I'll give him a merciless thrashing. 282 00:20:41,913 --> 00:20:45,390 It's so heavy, I wonder. There could be a ton of money in it. 283 00:20:46,147 --> 00:20:47,513 A folding rule... 284 00:20:59,169 --> 00:21:00,754 Damn it all... 285 00:21:06,505 --> 00:21:08,712 One pound twenty pence. 286 00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:14,337 It's clear now how hard it is to become rich by honest means. 287 00:21:18,525 --> 00:21:23,081 Aieee, help! 288 00:21:23,201 --> 00:21:25,770 Murderer! 289 00:21:25,890 --> 00:21:28,153 What happened, Bendeguz? 290 00:21:28,437 --> 00:21:30,701 I didn't see the dear lady there. 291 00:21:30,821 --> 00:21:33,584 You don't imagine had I'd seen her, I'd have dumped the water like that? 292 00:21:33,637 --> 00:21:35,741 I'm not of such kin. 293 00:21:35,861 --> 00:21:37,680 I'm only a little short-sighted. 294 00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:40,828 I already often see short sausage and bacon too 295 00:21:40,948 --> 00:21:42,517 which thou bringest me for lunch. 296 00:21:42,592 --> 00:21:45,429 I'll kill you, you fiend! 297 00:21:45,485 --> 00:21:47,604 Such an uproar over a mere nothing. 298 00:21:47,660 --> 00:21:52,808 I've been in a few hullabaloos with this witch, but I hadn't heard her holler like this even in my dreams. 299 00:21:52,860 --> 00:21:58,910 And regarding courtesy, everyone should see that I never go beyond the limits of gentility. 300 00:21:59,030 --> 00:22:00,702 Just come here! 301 00:22:02,118 --> 00:22:03,088 Come on! 302 00:22:04,726 --> 00:22:07,048 Come down here. 303 00:22:13,567 --> 00:22:17,730 Oh! Fancy, I knew your father! 304 00:22:19,283 --> 00:22:20,580 What's your name? 305 00:22:20,700 --> 00:22:25,206 - Bendeguz Fable is my given name. - By golly! What a nice name you have! 306 00:22:25,326 --> 00:22:29,461 Your father's a big tall man, eh? I knew him long ago. 307 00:22:29,581 --> 00:22:32,176 Your mother's a bit smaller than your father, eh? 308 00:22:32,542 --> 00:22:34,177 Is this not true, eh? Well, come then! 309 00:22:34,393 --> 00:22:38,216 If you know my parents like this, you must be a good soul. 310 00:22:38,662 --> 00:22:42,288 - What is thy name? - My name is simply Uncle Spoil! 311 00:22:42,485 --> 00:22:45,519 Have you not yet heard of me from the watchman? 312 00:22:46,163 --> 00:22:48,511 Well...I've heard a few things. 313 00:22:49,074 --> 00:22:50,352 What things? 314 00:22:50,916 --> 00:22:53,682 Well only that I should keep far away from you, because 315 00:22:53,710 --> 00:22:56,838 those 1000 times less villainous than thee have been hanged. 316 00:22:57,530 --> 00:23:01,770 Right you are! He isn't as foolish as they say, your...watchman, Bendeguz! 317 00:23:01,890 --> 00:23:05,565 You know what? We'll drink to your watchman's health! 318 00:23:05,685 --> 00:23:08,082 Well to my watchman's health I won't. 319 00:23:08,307 --> 00:23:11,266 But otherwise, I'll drink normally because I often hardly drink. 320 00:23:22,294 --> 00:23:26,441 That's it! How and how are you, Bendeguz? 321 00:23:27,099 --> 00:23:29,222 Any unusual problems? 322 00:23:30,668 --> 00:23:32,519 There is, and there isn't. 323 00:23:32,725 --> 00:23:35,628 There is and there isn't? What kind of talk is that? 324 00:23:35,957 --> 00:23:39,845 You can tell me anything. Don't be afraid, I won't pass it on. 325 00:23:40,578 --> 00:23:43,261 Well, the watchman's mother-in-law is here. 326 00:23:43,896 --> 00:23:47,435 Who, the shrew? I hope she doesn't beat you, the hag! 327 00:23:47,726 --> 00:23:51,446 No way! I'm not of such kin that anyone should beat. 328 00:23:52,099 --> 00:23:57,453 I see! So that's your objection to her, since she doesn't want to jump into the well. 329 00:23:57,490 --> 00:24:02,267 I absolutely agree with you! Now's exactly the time that she hang herself! 330 00:24:02,742 --> 00:24:05,748 You're the kind of friend I've always dreamed of. 331 00:24:10,330 --> 00:24:11,880 Oh my... 332 00:24:13,219 --> 00:24:16,699 Good day, my lady! How good it is that you are here! 333 00:24:17,732 --> 00:24:20,794 Know that I wish to tell thee, that we must heal the breach. 334 00:24:21,481 --> 00:24:25,027 I no longer mean any harm, no more than a newborn lamb could. 335 00:24:28,526 --> 00:24:30,580 How nice thy colour is. 336 00:24:30,968 --> 00:24:32,894 Such a beautiful yellow. 337 00:24:33,014 --> 00:24:34,608 Know what I mean? 338 00:24:34,859 --> 00:24:38,342 You filthy chicken thief! You son-of-a-bitch! I'll kill you! 339 00:24:38,374 --> 00:24:41,025 Damn you! I'll bash your head in! 340 00:24:41,076 --> 00:24:42,657 Take that! 341 00:24:43,111 --> 00:24:45,095 Get out of here! 342 00:24:45,266 --> 00:24:49,017 Now beat it, you shriveled old shoe fit for hanging. 343 00:24:49,137 --> 00:24:51,124 Either you will die or me. 344 00:24:52,483 --> 00:24:55,741 Curse you! Curse you! 345 00:24:55,861 --> 00:24:59,027 Cut that out! No need to shriek so loud. 346 00:24:59,650 --> 00:25:04,001 What despair we'd be in, if all the dead carried on such howling. 347 00:25:07,199 --> 00:25:09,956 Hear this, you don't command me. I serve you no longer. 348 00:25:10,693 --> 00:25:14,180 Hand out my wages! Tomorrow I'm going to the roadmender be his herder. 349 00:25:16,551 --> 00:25:18,084 Come now! 350 00:25:19,106 --> 00:25:21,638 Why would you go to the roadmender? 351 00:25:23,862 --> 00:25:25,771 Would you bring the watchman's house into gossip? 352 00:25:26,070 --> 00:25:29,765 Every day I'm hungry. Bread's short, bacon's scarce. 353 00:25:30,021 --> 00:25:31,155 I should not think so! 354 00:25:31,695 --> 00:25:36,784 Still, I say this: a child such as you deserves the fodder he eats. 355 00:25:39,023 --> 00:25:40,526 I am also hungry. 356 00:25:41,413 --> 00:25:43,697 You? Why, the attic's full! 357 00:25:43,892 --> 00:25:44,914 But she doesn't give! 358 00:25:44,966 --> 00:25:51,144 That's why, Bendeguz. The old mother wasn't always the in-law of a government official. 359 00:25:51,486 --> 00:25:56,455 They're familiar with hunger, poverty. This is why she hordes and minds the food. You know? 360 00:25:56,575 --> 00:25:58,493 She doesn't want the starvation to return. 361 00:26:00,241 --> 00:26:02,070 362 00:26:00,241 --> 00:26:02,070 - Has your head healed over? - Which one? 363 00:26:02,190 --> 00:26:05,717 - Which one? The one the peasants smash in. - It has. 364 00:26:05,837 --> 00:26:09,808 But I have an ugly swelling on my ankle. I'm barely able to run. 365 00:26:10,681 --> 00:26:14,636 Hey, the gossipmongers say you graze in forbidden pastures. 366 00:26:15,415 --> 00:26:16,759 A peasant came to me, here. 367 00:26:16,879 --> 00:26:20,507 I should pay for the weeds you grazed. 368 00:26:21,211 --> 00:26:24,198 I said I would pay, if he caught you. 369 00:26:24,527 --> 00:26:26,810 Until then he should shut his maw. 370 00:26:27,270 --> 00:26:29,233 There's not a word of truth about those weeds. 371 00:26:29,271 --> 00:26:30,708 I don't even know what colour they were. 372 00:26:30,753 --> 00:26:33,525 Oh, Bendeguz! Do you think I believed it? Hell if I believed it. 373 00:26:33,841 --> 00:26:36,554 Well go, fill your belly! I'll tether the cows. 374 00:26:41,976 --> 00:26:44,997 What a two-faced cod this watchman is. 375 00:26:59,263 --> 00:27:05,310 What a person my watchman is. He always sleeps whenever possible, whether by night or day. 376 00:27:08,413 --> 00:27:14,578 I offered to cut the hair around his ears, as the train once took someone away. He'd be dismissed from his post. 377 00:27:14,698 --> 00:27:19,329 I then said I should go panhandling, but the watchman only shook his head. 378 00:27:19,449 --> 00:27:24,517 They say God created him as a watchman. He also wants to die as one. 379 00:27:24,637 --> 00:27:29,850 But this will be much later, once he has gleaned all of his pensions from the railway bank. 380 00:27:34,494 --> 00:27:37,315 Hey you, open that blasted bar! 381 00:28:16,135 --> 00:28:17,855 Wait'll I get you! 382 00:28:25,170 --> 00:28:29,391 Let the country and the whole world know that I was always a boy with good intent. 383 00:28:29,511 --> 00:28:33,382 But when I finally carried out my intents, they fell through. 384 00:28:33,435 --> 00:28:35,563 Leave me alone! 385 00:28:35,821 --> 00:28:40,968 Don't weep, Shaggy! Don't weep, my puppy! I give you my word, I will indemnify you. 386 00:28:41,088 --> 00:28:44,230 I'll collect pipevines in the woods, and cure you with them. 387 00:28:44,770 --> 00:28:49,913 Or if this doesn't help, I'll smudge your muzzle with dottle or cobweb. 388 00:28:50,417 --> 00:28:54,539 You know, there're other medicines too, but they must be taken from the cows. 389 00:28:54,659 --> 00:28:57,938 And I know how much you hate cows, Shaggy. 390 00:29:22,681 --> 00:29:26,051 Hey! By the Blessed Virgin, I'll strike you dead! 391 00:29:26,171 --> 00:29:29,292 You scoundrel! You chicken thief! 392 00:29:32,157 --> 00:29:35,363 I'll say to God this much: they're all commendable cattle. 393 00:29:35,483 --> 00:29:40,130 Especially Gemma. One would hardly find anything objectionable with her. 394 00:29:40,629 --> 00:29:44,339 I'll bet straight up that Taylor the watchman will make a cheap bargain. 395 00:29:45,274 --> 00:29:48,022 And where is your Taylor the watchman? 396 00:29:48,327 --> 00:29:51,051 Look there! There's the mother-in-law of Taylor the watchman. 397 00:29:51,171 --> 00:29:53,070 She'll bring the watchman. 398 00:29:53,329 --> 00:29:58,988 Only be warned: if you talk to her, whoop into her ears as loud as you can. 399 00:29:59,552 --> 00:30:02,346 Because that poor old woman's as deaf as a door-post. 400 00:30:03,215 --> 00:30:09,022 Unfortunately I can't go further, as I have to watch the cows so they won't go into the cornfield. 401 00:30:09,421 --> 00:30:10,982 Okay, my boy. 402 00:30:19,647 --> 00:30:22,184 Where's Taylor the watchman? 403 00:30:22,304 --> 00:30:24,966 She really is deaf! 404 00:30:26,270 --> 00:30:28,688 Where's Taylor the watchman?! 405 00:30:28,964 --> 00:30:31,806 May the devil scorch this deaf swine! 406 00:30:33,286 --> 00:30:37,771 Ow, what do you want? Hey, I'm looking for Taylor the watchman! 407 00:30:42,238 --> 00:30:44,763 I can't even sit on the crapper in peace? 408 00:30:46,900 --> 00:30:52,154 Oh, she's completely insane and plumb deaf as well. 409 00:30:52,377 --> 00:30:54,514 How do you figure that she's deaf? 410 00:30:55,007 --> 00:30:58,671 The cow herder told me, if you please. 411 00:31:18,103 --> 00:31:20,440 Woah, Bossy! 412 00:31:23,040 --> 00:31:24,767 Curse you. 413 00:31:25,318 --> 00:31:28,958 It's alright, Bossy, it's alright. 414 00:31:35,275 --> 00:31:39,614 Oh my god! Oh, help me, oh! 415 00:31:40,477 --> 00:31:43,882 Oh my god! Oh, I'm dying, oh! 416 00:31:48,350 --> 00:31:50,980 Here! Your slippers! 417 00:31:51,849 --> 00:31:55,477 Don't walk barefoot, or else your nose will run. 418 00:31:55,741 --> 00:32:00,332 Don't speak as a friend, you demon spawn! Go milk the cows instead! 419 00:32:00,452 --> 00:32:04,865 Oh, why did I have to buy a new cow...don't speak to me like that! 420 00:32:05,599 --> 00:32:11,352 I speak to everyone as an equal friend. That, I declare before the country and world. 421 00:32:15,303 --> 00:32:19,462 I'll smash your face! Stop, you! 422 00:32:19,582 --> 00:32:25,451 Fit for a hanging! You curse! May God make the sky fall on you! 423 00:32:31,805 --> 00:32:37,042 There was never an urgent matter in my life. Yet I ran and ran so much, needless to say. 424 00:32:37,834 --> 00:32:41,509 Our dear lady became so quick and nimble since the tragedy 425 00:32:41,629 --> 00:32:44,315 that she hunted me round the cowshed every day. 426 00:32:44,773 --> 00:32:49,670 I was afraid of getting trapped into a corner and having the know-how knocked out of my head. 427 00:32:50,198 --> 00:32:57,055 If I understand you well, you'd like to devise some sweet revenge on the old lady, eh? 428 00:32:57,466 --> 00:33:00,449 Well, then I'll give you some sound advice. 429 00:33:00,569 --> 00:33:05,339 If you listen to me, the dear lady will clamber up the poplar tree in shame. 430 00:33:05,459 --> 00:33:09,014 But reveal this to no one, otherwise she'll have no superstition. 431 00:33:09,134 --> 00:33:13,957 - Because we'll bedevil that old dog! - How? 432 00:33:14,486 --> 00:33:20,321 The thing is, Bendeguz, is that you get half a yard of trouser string from somewhere. 433 00:33:20,441 --> 00:33:23,163 You cut the string up into half inch pieces. 434 00:33:23,283 --> 00:33:27,742 You have to do this right at midnight. At last you say this aloud: 435 00:33:29,098 --> 00:33:32,750 A hundred cats, nine cats! Then you form a cross 436 00:33:32,870 --> 00:33:36,625 and with that, the exquisite superstition string is ready. 437 00:33:37,177 --> 00:33:41,685 Then you put it into the old lady's soup or greens. It doesn't matter. 438 00:33:42,196 --> 00:33:45,760 After she tastes the soup... 439 00:33:46,370 --> 00:33:50,885 ...in three hours she'll be as mad as a mouse. 440 00:34:16,529 --> 00:34:18,360 Dear God! 441 00:34:25,259 --> 00:34:30,114 Here! Take it! You dishrag! 442 00:34:30,590 --> 00:34:33,573 Curse you! I'll smash your head! 443 00:34:35,977 --> 00:34:38,736 You! You'll pay for this! Stop! 444 00:34:38,856 --> 00:34:40,092 Curses! 445 00:34:40,212 --> 00:34:42,719 How nimble you are on foot, Bendeguz! 446 00:34:43,024 --> 00:34:45,279 Maybe you should become a soldier?! 447 00:34:45,496 --> 00:34:50,169 I know it well, the world biggest problem is that it's not governed by cow herders. 448 00:34:50,756 --> 00:34:55,042 If I became minister, I'd turn everything around. 449 00:34:55,507 --> 00:35:00,138 I'd take the switch away from the peasants, and girdle myself with a revolver. 450 00:35:00,258 --> 00:35:02,251 I'll abolish the beatings once and for all. 451 00:35:02,371 --> 00:35:06,419 Whoever violates the law, I'll have the watchman wallop them. 452 00:35:07,100 --> 00:35:09,830 I'll have the country's haversack locked up. 453 00:35:10,090 --> 00:35:12,578 So the money won't be stolen from it. 454 00:35:20,169 --> 00:35:23,292 Dear lady, by which train have you arrived? 455 00:35:23,412 --> 00:35:27,132 Well my dear child, you foul-mouthed Tobias. 456 00:35:27,190 --> 00:35:31,887 I cannot tell you, because that train already left four hours ago. 457 00:35:32,408 --> 00:35:39,054 I'll also tell you, if we're to be on good terms, don't call me dear lady, else I'll slap you. 458 00:35:39,174 --> 00:35:42,189 On top of that, I'm not your darling. 459 00:35:42,588 --> 00:35:46,780 My name's Rosie, if you must know. 460 00:35:49,011 --> 00:35:52,804 So art thou Rosie Knockneed, who the horse dealer often mentions? 461 00:35:52,843 --> 00:35:55,548 Knockneed, your mother's knee-cap! 462 00:35:55,668 --> 00:35:57,164 I beg your pardon dear lady! 463 00:35:57,209 --> 00:36:01,372 Now I'm telling you to scrape off, else I'll slap your snotty conk and give you a bloody nose. 464 00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:05,558 God with you! 465 00:36:06,407 --> 00:36:09,353 Well that's why we came, brother Taylor. 466 00:36:09,718 --> 00:36:14,076 to keep the engagement in this peculiar way. There will be wine, something to eat 467 00:36:14,436 --> 00:36:16,052 tobacco, this and that. 468 00:36:16,129 --> 00:36:20,248 And then, if the Heavenly Father who resides above us wills it, we'll celebrate the wedding, too. 469 00:36:20,368 --> 00:36:23,830 Of course, I wouldn't want the bride to mingle, lest someone snatch her away in front of me. 470 00:36:23,860 --> 00:36:26,865 Why the devil would the hooved one want to betroth this Rosie? 471 00:36:27,192 --> 00:36:32,049 She's so ugly, anyone with eyes could easily spot her. 472 00:36:32,169 --> 00:36:35,663 And no one would steal her from him, even if they were paid. 473 00:36:35,694 --> 00:36:39,066 We came to introduce ourselves, as I am the bridesman. 474 00:36:39,186 --> 00:36:42,166 Not only for the wedding, but for the next 30 years. 475 00:36:42,286 --> 00:36:44,510 This is the most reknowned watchman in the world. 476 00:36:44,541 --> 00:36:48,434 I lead most maidens to the church to get married. 477 00:36:48,672 --> 00:36:50,328 My wife says... 478 00:36:50,364 --> 00:36:54,154 I didn't bring her myself, as we had a slight disagreement this morning. 479 00:36:54,176 --> 00:36:58,038 So I was obliged to give her a good thrashing once or twice over. 480 00:36:58,158 --> 00:37:02,256 (thank you very much) As I treat my wife real gentlemanlike. 481 00:37:02,633 --> 00:37:08,527 As I've been a gentleman my whole life, as a bachelor namely. I've been bachelor for a long time, however. 482 00:37:08,844 --> 00:37:13,964 Those who knew me said: Joseph Cane isn't handsome, but a gentleman! 483 00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:16,772 This was my melody at that time, let me see: 484 00:37:18,606 --> 00:37:22,962 I'm not like some pair of trousers 485 00:37:23,082 --> 00:37:26,731 that are bartered week by week. 486 00:37:26,851 --> 00:37:31,111 When I had sung this in the village, everyone looked at me. 487 00:37:31,231 --> 00:37:34,187 Even those classy young ladies from the capital. 488 00:37:34,307 --> 00:37:37,504 Eat and partake, betrothed couple! 489 00:37:39,770 --> 00:37:42,833 If I were to call someone to appear before me 490 00:37:42,953 --> 00:37:49,578 they would surely crawl forth on the second call, whether from beneath the bed or the stove. 491 00:37:49,848 --> 00:37:56,611 Ho ho! I will surely not come forth on the first word, nor the second, nor even the third! 492 00:37:56,731 --> 00:38:00,210 When I was an eligible girl no one could've lured me down, even from the attic with a lantern. 493 00:38:00,263 --> 00:38:05,283 But I'm saying that one would come forth on the second call, should I summon them. 494 00:38:05,403 --> 00:38:08,176 - Shall we swear to it, then? - Hide yourself under the bed, then! 495 00:38:08,205 --> 00:38:09,719 Then I'll hide. 496 00:38:10,070 --> 00:38:13,542 Well...come forth! 497 00:38:13,833 --> 00:38:17,018 Here I am, Joseph Cane! 498 00:38:18,061 --> 00:38:20,052 I will not come forth. 499 00:38:20,172 --> 00:38:24,796 Come forth, I say, now for the second time! 500 00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:26,430 I'm still waiting! 501 00:38:26,469 --> 00:38:30,689 Then stay, and may a crackling tulip-bound thunderbolt strike you! 502 00:38:26,469 --> 00:38:30,693 503 00:38:30,712 --> 00:38:35,117 since as I live I'll never call again, not even by next Christmas. 504 00:38:35,175 --> 00:38:41,397 Curse your pagan gods for making a fool of me! 505 00:38:42,210 --> 00:38:43,981 What a wily fox you are! 506 00:38:45,655 --> 00:38:49,224 Dear old friend, I don't want to quibble any further. 507 00:38:49,805 --> 00:38:52,031 So I will keep the engagement. 508 00:38:52,867 --> 00:38:55,591 A woman finer than Rosie, I couldn't find even in my dreams. 509 00:38:56,784 --> 00:39:00,034 She deserves a place on my cloak to be made for her. 510 00:39:00,154 --> 00:39:04,571 Very well Michael, my friend. Now we can eat, as is proper on such a lovely feast. 511 00:39:17,504 --> 00:39:22,455 The greatest blessing is the corn dumpling. 512 00:39:22,476 --> 00:39:27,390 Not only because it's grown from the cob, but if a man such as myself 513 00:39:28,043 --> 00:39:33,496 were to gulp down fifty of them, it's imperative that he not eat or drink for half a year. 514 00:39:33,797 --> 00:39:36,624 Just like a camel in the desert. 515 00:39:37,202 --> 00:39:41,288 A gentlemen with a delicate stomach isn't wont to eat this. 516 00:39:42,058 --> 00:39:43,830 They don't know what's truly good. 517 00:39:44,862 --> 00:39:50,218 But poor men, when they can, do eat, stuffing their faces full of them. 518 00:39:50,238 --> 00:39:53,058 I love it! I've already gulped down about eight or ten pieces. 519 00:39:53,094 --> 00:39:57,807 Praise be to Heavenly God, who created in his image... 520 00:39:58,637 --> 00:40:00,683 ...me as well! 521 00:40:00,803 --> 00:40:05,962 If he's speaking of me, well then. I do indeed resemble the Almighty, to some extent. 522 00:40:06,324 --> 00:40:09,709 But him, whose nose looks like a boot-top? 523 00:40:10,244 --> 00:40:13,544 I believe no one in this whole house resembles the Almighty. 524 00:40:13,761 --> 00:40:18,010 First we have Rosie: her belly looks exactly like a hay stack. 525 00:40:18,376 --> 00:40:21,855 The witch is flat in the front like fried dough from behind. 526 00:40:22,165 --> 00:40:26,430 In the interest of being decent I'll forget the watchman. So once again it is I who remains. 527 00:40:27,289 --> 00:40:29,235 Give me five more! 528 00:40:29,355 --> 00:40:31,543 You've got your share already! 529 00:40:32,370 --> 00:40:35,153 The hen loves the sour cherry 530 00:40:35,548 --> 00:40:38,895 We both love the same one 531 00:40:39,153 --> 00:40:44,728 My god, how strange when we both go to her! 532 00:40:45,753 --> 00:40:50,293 The hen loves the sour cherry, we both love the same one 533 00:40:50,588 --> 00:40:55,778 My god, how strange when we both go to her! 534 00:40:56,590 --> 00:41:01,277 Adam and Eve were saints, yet they always cheated! 535 00:41:02,613 --> 00:41:07,764 And you, son of poor Jonas, how could you know what... 536 00:41:08,502 --> 00:41:16,848 - The locoman! - Right behind Steve Tisa the potatohead! 537 00:41:17,108 --> 00:41:30,401 True love cannot be hidden 538 00:41:34,896 --> 00:41:41,918 The locomotive goes to Kaniza, Kaniza, Kaniza, to the station 539 00:41:42,038 --> 00:41:54,230 The locoman sits in front, he alone controls the locomotion 540 00:41:59,850 --> 00:42:03,048 You may now kiss the bride! 541 00:42:11,562 --> 00:42:14,295 I thought my watchman loved Rosie. 542 00:42:14,415 --> 00:42:20,203 But if he were a master of love-making, it would've been damn hard to see beneath his hat. 543 00:42:20,323 --> 00:42:24,717 Just wait and see, once or twice I do get married 544 00:42:24,837 --> 00:42:29,597 I'll look for a skinnier and...smaller bride. 545 00:42:35,038 --> 00:42:41,430 Joseph Cane isn't handsome, but a gentleman! 546 00:42:41,550 --> 00:42:46,496 Kiss me at once you dirty lass! You hear me, Rosie? 547 00:42:46,538 --> 00:42:51,494 At last I learn the secrets of love! 548 00:42:51,614 --> 00:42:53,306 No screeching! 549 00:42:53,426 --> 00:42:57,849 To screech like this at such a time! You'd free yourself sooner, if you wouldn't screech. 550 00:42:57,899 --> 00:43:00,927 Give back the handkerchief! 551 00:43:00,961 --> 00:43:04,230 Something's wrong here, as she doesn't have a handkerchief at all! 552 00:43:04,986 --> 00:43:08,861 Kiss me now, or I'll poke your eyes out! 553 00:43:10,324 --> 00:43:13,443 Don't whimper! Wallop the hooved one's head instead! 554 00:43:14,138 --> 00:43:18,055 Bloody hell! Dammit. 555 00:43:28,660 --> 00:43:40,030 True love cannot be hidden 556 00:43:40,550 --> 00:43:46,696 Drunken sod! To hell with you! 557 00:43:46,816 --> 00:43:52,173 Look out! Lift his leg! 558 00:43:52,293 --> 00:43:54,842 Lord Jesus Christ! 559 00:44:01,390 --> 00:44:07,540 Even the gentlefolk of Pest would dine on this curd. 560 00:44:08,981 --> 00:44:12,595 They'd lick it straight from all ten of their fingers. 561 00:44:12,715 --> 00:44:15,310 Like this, here you go. 562 00:44:15,430 --> 00:44:19,347 Drink, my old friend, drink! You only live once anyways, right? 563 00:44:20,577 --> 00:44:25,383 There you go! You'd have no problem at all, if the watchman's wife was still alive. 564 00:44:25,503 --> 00:44:29,044 I remember, she was a good soul even in death. 565 00:44:29,164 --> 00:44:34,282 Once she appeared wearing a white gown at the dear lady's bed 566 00:44:34,402 --> 00:44:39,264 and the witch was shivering in sickness for a good month! 567 00:44:39,384 --> 00:44:40,601 What did she die of? 568 00:44:40,658 --> 00:44:46,064 Well, either she hung herself from the tree, or the watchman helped her up. 569 00:44:46,184 --> 00:44:48,941 They say this and that. 570 00:44:49,227 --> 00:44:52,206 How could you rouse such a wraith? 571 00:44:52,559 --> 00:44:56,859 - Well, it could be done. - Do you know how? 572 00:44:57,182 --> 00:45:03,743 How would I not? I am an experienced and widely travelled person, my dear old friend. 573 00:45:03,863 --> 00:45:12,101 I'll say this: for eight full months I was by myself in the county jail. 574 00:45:12,571 --> 00:45:19,205 - Golly! Really? - Sure! Drink my old friend! You only live once anyways! 575 00:45:19,777 --> 00:45:26,338 Now we chant the Missus Chicho, then I'll tell you about the matter of the ghost. 576 00:45:26,707 --> 00:45:37,945 Missus Chicho has three daughters, all three in one petticoat. 577 00:45:38,065 --> 00:45:49,825 Oh, Missus Chicho, my dove! My kiss suits you well. 578 00:45:51,112 --> 00:45:54,378 How do you do, lady of the watchman. 579 00:45:54,498 --> 00:45:58,854 It is I, Bendeguz, who speaks to you. Thy cow herder. 580 00:45:58,974 --> 00:46:01,222 Please listen to me, dear lady! 581 00:46:01,342 --> 00:46:06,194 I merely ask that you oblige the watchman's house with your company for one or two nights. 582 00:46:06,314 --> 00:46:09,589 Only enough so that the watchman is thrown into fright a few times. 583 00:46:09,709 --> 00:46:13,827 Thy dear mother and the clumsy Rosie, let them be thrown into sickness. 584 00:46:13,947 --> 00:46:20,046 But at least three times, as I fear if they die only once, they may still crawl forth from beneath the coffin. 585 00:46:20,506 --> 00:46:26,010 My dear, grand lady, I have nobody besides thee in this world. 586 00:46:26,302 --> 00:46:29,479 My mother as well, as she gave me away to the foul hooved one. 587 00:46:29,599 --> 00:46:33,514 And if even you cannot help me, I'll starve to death in short time. 588 00:46:33,634 --> 00:46:35,661 I'm not a wealthy man 589 00:46:35,781 --> 00:46:40,156 but I know from Uncle Spoil that you like the trouser string at midnight. 590 00:46:40,276 --> 00:46:46,688 I'll give you my share, cut up properly, as the superstition bids. 591 00:47:35,459 --> 00:47:38,633 What's this shoe cloth you've cooked? 592 00:47:42,247 --> 00:47:45,971 Look! Do you even cook the patch cloth with the soup? 593 00:47:46,091 --> 00:47:51,018 You crazy, barn-dancing, old shoe! 594 00:47:58,807 --> 00:48:00,990 Why not do it out in the open? 595 00:48:01,110 --> 00:48:06,843 Why not do it out in the open? Drop the bundle of rags here on the table and plainly say: 596 00:48:06,963 --> 00:48:08,871 Eat, you numbskull! 597 00:48:11,148 --> 00:48:16,047 Soon after, all of the black crickets in the world moved into the house. 598 00:48:16,322 --> 00:48:22,284 We heard such fine music that even Imre Magyari, the gypsy virtuoso, could've played there. 599 00:48:22,404 --> 00:48:24,926 Whoever hadn't yet heard his falsetto 600 00:48:25,046 --> 00:48:29,734 cannot imagine how loudly and beautifully the fiddlers of the fields can play. 601 00:48:30,533 --> 00:48:34,624 I, for example, sat in the house listening for music. 602 00:48:35,138 --> 00:48:39,761 From thereon something shameful and contemptible happened every day at the house. 603 00:48:48,000 --> 00:48:51,064 On top of that, I had so much diarrhea mixed with bellyache 604 00:48:51,184 --> 00:48:54,348 that I scarcely managed to execrate the watchman and the witch. 605 00:48:56,643 --> 00:49:01,394 A steadfast spook, the dear lady is. That's one thing I cannot deny. 606 00:49:07,899 --> 00:49:11,054 Come here, Bendeguzes! 607 00:49:11,789 --> 00:49:17,421 Come on! All of you...drink! 608 00:49:21,789 --> 00:49:25,219 Like that! That's it, that's it! 609 00:49:27,971 --> 00:49:29,146 There you go. 610 00:49:37,926 --> 00:49:43,136 Good...there's a little left in the pot. 611 00:49:45,312 --> 00:49:49,238 Well, Bendeguz. Now I teach you a craft. 612 00:49:49,642 --> 00:49:52,907 I'll teach you to drink. 613 00:49:53,421 --> 00:49:59,824 You need to drink, so that you must always see the pot. 614 00:50:00,852 --> 00:50:07,732 For instance: I see three pots right now, though there is only one to my knowledge. 615 00:50:12,632 --> 00:50:17,218 Bendeguz...please, expel the other two Bendeguzes! 616 00:50:19,824 --> 00:50:23,237 - Only I myself am here! - Oh, Bendeguz. 617 00:50:23,357 --> 00:50:26,485 Never get married! 618 00:50:27,567 --> 00:50:33,255 She won't leave me alone. She keeps coming back! 619 00:50:41,126 --> 00:50:45,658 Eh! You get boozed up well in fright. 620 00:50:46,705 --> 00:50:49,842 Good night! 621 00:50:50,172 --> 00:50:54,685 Still, I'll look around the courtyard. If you get into such a mess. 622 00:51:02,947 --> 00:51:06,401 I'll be damned if that isn't the dear lady there. 623 00:51:07,356 --> 00:51:10,585 There's the spook, at the dung pile! 624 00:51:12,378 --> 00:51:17,318 Where's that tramp? Now I'll catch you, you filthy whore! 625 00:51:17,438 --> 00:51:19,116 Shhh! 626 00:51:40,052 --> 00:51:43,300 Her throat! Grab her throat! 627 00:51:49,109 --> 00:51:50,864 Run Bendeguz! 628 00:51:56,933 --> 00:51:58,713 Her throat! 629 00:52:20,529 --> 00:52:23,997 - What's wrong with mister watchman? - His stomach's bloated. 630 00:52:24,117 --> 00:52:27,878 - My daugther did this. - What a peculiar illness. 631 00:52:28,483 --> 00:52:32,501 I never would've guessed that such an ignominy could fall upon a watchman. 632 00:52:32,621 --> 00:52:35,253 Do you hear me? Should I call the priest? 633 00:52:35,373 --> 00:52:39,776 Nothing can help here, only the leech man. 634 00:52:40,996 --> 00:52:45,932 Gather your things, Bendeguz! Search for the leech man in the fields! 635 00:52:55,289 --> 00:53:00,060 I was just looking for you! My watchman fell into a sickness from water. 636 00:53:00,180 --> 00:53:04,235 There's already so much water in him, that if you don't hurry it'll swamp the whole house. 637 00:53:04,528 --> 00:53:09,289 It's impossible! He hasn't drunken so much as a bucket of water in his whole life. 638 00:53:09,584 --> 00:53:13,253 Of course not! My watchman isn't a fool to drink water. 639 00:53:13,373 --> 00:53:18,042 But for sure, he's just upon death. And we still haven't notified the relatives. 640 00:53:18,570 --> 00:53:22,995 Well? What's the matter with thee? How did the sickness begin? 641 00:53:23,115 --> 00:53:26,445 Be honest with me, else I'll have to kick thee in the belly. 642 00:53:26,565 --> 00:53:31,858 Well you know, my daughter came here. The one that died last year. 643 00:53:31,978 --> 00:53:34,629 And he? He tried to choke me. 644 00:53:34,749 --> 00:53:40,757 I was in the middle of the greatest bellyache. 645 00:53:40,877 --> 00:53:43,031 I'll cure thee in a jiffy. 646 00:53:43,151 --> 00:53:46,206 Albeit thou hast already a smell like so many pungent horse droppings. 647 00:53:46,326 --> 00:53:49,362 It's the most dire condition, whatever the government may say. 648 00:53:49,482 --> 00:53:54,310 This is already the last stage. But you should not be forlorn because of it! 649 00:53:54,430 --> 00:53:57,867 As I say it once "Rise, Lazzarus"! 650 00:53:57,987 --> 00:53:59,537 Even the dead must spring forth! 651 00:53:59,657 --> 00:54:02,876 But he isn't Lazzarus, he's Taylor the watchman. Didn't you know? 652 00:54:02,996 --> 00:54:07,931 You don't say! Bring a bit of turpentine and brandy! 653 00:54:08,051 --> 00:54:11,526 Half a cut of bacon, a feather duster 654 00:54:11,646 --> 00:54:14,114 a radish, and half a yard of trouser string. 655 00:54:14,234 --> 00:54:16,949 - Oh, bring them I will. - Dost thou have a trouser string? 656 00:54:17,536 --> 00:54:22,630 - You must be very happy! - Just by chance, I have on me seven kinds of cat fur! 657 00:54:22,750 --> 00:54:25,921 We'll mix this with tobacco! 658 00:54:27,070 --> 00:54:32,600 And puff heartily! 659 00:54:36,252 --> 00:54:39,609 And this, this onion... 660 00:54:39,729 --> 00:54:43,003 ...you must hold it! 661 00:54:47,609 --> 00:54:51,755 - Dost thou feel any better? - It seems to be a little better. 662 00:54:51,875 --> 00:54:56,967 Well, you must keep trying, if you wish to be well. Otherwise I'll have to lower thee into the well by an anchor. 663 00:54:57,087 --> 00:55:00,104 - Be careful! Do not lose the onion! - I won't! 664 00:55:05,612 --> 00:55:07,648 Keep running! Run! 665 00:55:18,711 --> 00:55:23,657 I feel much better! I feel like I've just fallen from the sky. 666 00:55:23,695 --> 00:55:26,296 I cannot accept money, only when I return. 667 00:55:26,334 --> 00:55:29,481 As I must drive these wiles out of the house, together with the sickness. 668 00:55:29,510 --> 00:55:32,275 The future cannot be seen by anyone! 669 00:55:34,175 --> 00:55:35,901 Take this too! 670 00:55:36,021 --> 00:55:37,650 Hurry up, thou! 671 00:55:39,986 --> 00:55:42,229 To the Father and the Son. 672 00:55:43,826 --> 00:55:45,693 Hello there! Stop! 673 00:55:45,813 --> 00:55:49,955 I brought my watchman's Sunday clothes, which he has saved up for ten years. 674 00:55:49,976 --> 00:55:51,200 Very good! 675 00:56:13,430 --> 00:56:15,762 Have you come home again? 676 00:56:22,050 --> 00:56:24,568 Do your work, dear lady, do your work! 677 00:56:31,489 --> 00:56:35,066 - Only the Szelei saint's day holy water can help here! - From where? 678 00:56:35,085 --> 00:56:39,083 From Szele! In which members of the feast washed the feet of Christ. 679 00:56:39,103 --> 00:56:43,359 You must go in the morning, and come at night for the water! Only then will the dead be still. 680 00:56:43,922 --> 00:56:46,048 Did you hear that, Bendeguz? Bendeguz! 681 00:56:46,168 --> 00:56:50,762 End your feasting! Set off to Sele! 682 00:56:51,055 --> 00:56:54,218 I'd go to the ends of the earth to bring the holy water! 683 00:56:55,475 --> 00:56:57,189 You can put your trust in me! 684 00:56:57,229 --> 00:56:59,297 All my kin have been honourable. 685 00:56:59,331 --> 00:57:01,555 - Come on! Set off! - I, especially, am of that sort. 686 00:57:02,000 --> 00:57:05,614 But I stipulate, however, that jam dumplings must be for dinner. 687 00:57:05,734 --> 00:57:11,091 I'll cook for you as many jam dumplings as you can eat! 688 00:57:11,113 --> 00:57:15,022 Just go! Hurry! Bring...bring that water... 689 00:57:15,142 --> 00:57:17,969 - Then it's settled, old bat! - Old bat? 690 00:57:18,020 --> 00:57:20,894 The devil take you! You'll get it when you return! 691 00:57:22,228 --> 00:57:24,943 Sergeant? 692 00:57:25,224 --> 00:57:27,084 Yes? 693 00:57:27,204 --> 00:57:29,301 Is my plume fluttering? 694 00:57:31,011 --> 00:57:32,777 It flutters, my boy! 695 00:57:32,897 --> 00:57:34,791 Then good! 696 00:57:38,158 --> 00:57:40,779 Stop! What's in your pitcher, boy? 697 00:57:40,899 --> 00:57:42,902 I carry consecrated water for my watchman. 698 00:57:43,022 --> 00:57:47,523 Ah! Did your watchman become so pious as to drink holy water instead of wine? 699 00:57:47,643 --> 00:57:50,440 - I hope he hasn't gone mad? - It's not for that! 700 00:57:50,560 --> 00:57:54,855 - The watchman's house is full of spirits. - And what sort of spirit lives there? 701 00:57:55,630 --> 00:57:58,945 So tell me, then, what sort of character is this? 702 00:57:59,065 --> 00:58:04,102 Where does he work, does he have a registered address, and so on, and so on. 703 00:58:04,525 --> 00:58:08,743 What I know is only that the spook has, till now, devoured eight large sausages 704 00:58:08,780 --> 00:58:13,778 one strip of bacon, and she drinks the wine from my master's flask every day. 705 00:58:14,200 --> 00:58:20,616 It comes and goes through the clefts of the house. All of the house's occupants have been taken ill. 706 00:58:21,288 --> 00:58:24,758 My watchman caught a water disease, the witch has jaundice 707 00:58:24,787 --> 00:58:27,839 even mister horse dealer has been caught by the flux. 708 00:58:27,959 --> 00:58:31,775 Yet I stand alone, somehow. Which is no wonder! 709 00:58:32,038 --> 00:58:37,355 As I'm an enlightened lad. Furthermore, I've drunken about three litres of holy water just today. 710 00:58:47,965 --> 00:58:49,280 What a kid! 711 00:58:49,296 --> 00:58:51,281 Why on earth are they snickering? 712 00:58:51,319 --> 00:58:56,188 I always knew the gendarmes were yokels. But this? I never would've thought. 713 00:58:56,308 --> 00:59:00,040 It'd be better if you'd give a prayer for the dearly departed. 714 00:59:00,075 --> 00:59:03,621 We aren't wont to pray for such a character! 715 00:59:03,741 --> 00:59:09,821 Besides, if we catch that spook we'll slap her face first 716 00:59:10,122 --> 00:59:15,269 then march her off to the county courthouse! 717 00:59:16,481 --> 00:59:20,248 Come on, walk in front! We'll accompany you. 718 00:59:30,886 --> 00:59:33,574 - Nice and hot! - Hot, hot... 719 00:59:35,952 --> 00:59:39,445 Eat, my dear! 720 00:59:47,319 --> 00:59:50,695 Let me in! 721 00:59:56,584 --> 00:59:59,832 Is something wrong? 722 01:00:21,097 --> 01:00:24,363 - Good, eh? - Good, for sure! 723 01:00:24,483 --> 01:00:27,005 Here you are! I'll bring a little more. 724 01:00:28,849 --> 01:00:33,922 Eat that! Let your bellies grow! 725 01:00:35,830 --> 01:00:40,675 Adam and Eve were saints, yet they always cheated, and you, son of poor Jonas 726 01:00:49,544 --> 01:00:53,900 - The locomotive goes, the locomotive goes to Kaniza - Not that! 727 01:00:54,020 --> 01:00:59,478 - The hen loves the sour cherry! - We both love the same one! 728 01:00:59,598 --> 01:01:02,965 They'll gobble up my dumplings as well. 729 01:01:03,235 --> 01:01:07,450 I'd rather upset my stomach, than leave any for them the next day. 730 01:01:14,947 --> 01:01:17,894 The spook's in the cornfield! 731 01:01:18,014 --> 01:01:21,053 - Damned mother of a rascal! - Is that so! Now we'll catch it! 732 01:01:22,556 --> 01:01:24,329 Filthy whore! You cannot escape now! 733 01:01:24,366 --> 01:01:26,085 My Blessed Virgin Mary! 734 01:01:26,127 --> 01:01:26,603 Where? 735 01:01:27,561 --> 01:01:29,588 Filthy whore! You cannot escape now! 736 01:01:34,553 --> 01:01:37,536 My Blessed Virgin Mary! My daughter! 737 01:01:39,884 --> 01:01:41,129 You go first! 738 01:01:41,503 --> 01:01:45,589 Oh! But, this is the road-mender's white donkey. 739 01:01:45,639 --> 01:01:48,495 I'll be goddamned! 740 01:01:50,746 --> 01:01:52,002 My wife! 741 01:02:06,137 --> 01:02:10,282 My Elizabeth has become a white donkey! 742 01:02:11,157 --> 01:02:13,001 Come on! Let's drink! 743 01:02:22,423 --> 01:02:24,196 Shame on you, Elizabeth! 744 01:02:26,198 --> 01:02:29,004 - To your health! - God with you. 745 01:02:36,659 --> 01:02:38,926 What? What? 746 01:02:42,084 --> 01:02:45,583 - I'll be goddamned! - Someone has besmirched the gendarmerie! 747 01:02:47,112 --> 01:02:54,242 My daughter, my daughter, my daughter's here! 748 01:02:54,463 --> 01:02:57,287 What are you doing here? 749 01:03:02,033 --> 01:03:05,227 In my house? 750 01:04:55,308 --> 01:05:01,684 So understand this, country and world: I've said it all, one after another, to air my grievances well. 751 01:05:02,477 --> 01:05:06,962 Because, after all, terrible things did happen to me if I think about it. 752 01:05:07,209 --> 01:05:12,081 Compared to this, the world war was just a common marketplace brawl and nothing more. 753 01:05:16,259 --> 01:05:20,303 [subtitles/translation by egimanna and stibbshoo] 62121

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