Original subtitles

Jake, it's me.

I'm really proud of you agreeing to do this. I hope you're packed up and you're

ready to go.

Call me before you leave.

I love you.

Yeah, it's fucking great, mate. That's fucking great.

I know you're there. Pick up the phone.

Jake, they've called me. They've said you've not turned up, you fucker.

Call me.

Jake? Hello?

Are you alright?

Okay.

We've come from Promise.

Alright, my name's Alan.

It's okay. It's alright. It's okay.

Summer holiday.

No more drinkies for a week or two.

We're all working for a week or two.

We're going where the sun is at Friday.

We're going where the sea is blue.

We've seen it at the movies.

So let's see if it's true.

Come on, sweetie, you need to wake up now.

You got yourself in a bit of a state today, haven't you?

Do you feel pretty, pretty ill?

That's excellent, isn't it, eh?

Because the worse you feel, the more you're going to remember this.

Yeah? Come on, we need to, we need to be getting you up and taking you

somewhere. Come on, sit up. Oh, come on, come back, sit down.

Fuck.

Wash your hands.

I'll tell you what's going to happen now. You're going to stand up.

You're going to do your pants up.

I just want to make sure I'm not sitting in your vomit, mate.

I'll tell you what, you'll be lucky.

OK, are you going to get in touch with me?

Am I not a bit young for you?

Have you had a 12 steps before?

No. Because it's the system of recovery treatment that's used here.

I'll pull you on the pants down and just give them a little shake, please.

The last time you drank was yesterday.

Yeah. Yeah.

Did you use any weed yesterday?

No.

This stuff here is great, but it's got alcohol in it, so we won't be letting

have it.

In terms of your sexuality, I was thinking, wondering.

Careful.

We've been made up for a valium detox.

Get that into you and make you feel a bit better.

You, Jake, will never be able to help yourself until you can help yourself.

There's a lot going on for you that you're talking about.

You may have more than one addiction, but you don't realise... The staff here

have had alcohol, drug problems, food problems... Your past isn't the problem.

You are.

My name's Robert, I'm an addict and compulsive helper. I feel good. Perfect

contact.

I'm Charlie, addict, alcoholic, compulsive helper.

I'm feeling a bit sort of flat.

I'm Mel, I'm an addict and I feel okay, a bit tired.

Jake.

Hello, I'm Jake.

You're an addict, Jake?

No. Okay.

What are you here for?

Well,

I'm here... I've been drinking a bit too much. OK.

Fair enough. My family are a bit concerned.

All right.

I'm perfectly happy with that.

How do you feel?

How do I feel?

Yeah, you feel irritated, angry.

I feel a bit out of place.

OK.

Jake was very confrontational at the beginning.

I mean, I had to confront him whether he was coming here because he wanted to be

here or whether anyone else wanted him to be here. The only thing that we know

is that he was meant to come in a day before and he didn't arrive.

So we were sent to collect him.

I don't know. I mean, although he was fairly compliant when we picked him up.

Is he just in for alcohol?

Well, he brought a bottle in of alcohol, but that's not unusual.

And he gave it up quite easily, I felt.

Is a drug involved?

No, he says he doesn't take drugs.

And he's on detox?

Yes, he's on a Valium detox four times a day, and he's actually had some this

morning. Paul was seen, I don't know if anyone else saw him, jogging around the

grounds last night.

So the little lad that hasn't got an exercise problem was out exercising last

night, and it just so happened that I walked up the stairs today and there was

someone jogging on the spot.

By the time I got up here, he'd gone, but my money would be on him.

Time to phone home.

It's nice.

What is it?

What's this? Weed?

Skunk. Skunk.

A little bit left from the home ground, from back home.

Not all serious here, you know.

I had a chap of mine in this old place, found E .T. on a skit and brought it

back and plonked it at the end of the garden.

He has a laugh now and again.

There's nothing wrong with it, you know.

There's nothing wrong with what I do.

I've questioned that and I think actually if you look inside yourself,

would too.

Yeah, you can have the power.

Yeah. But then you leave and you go use.

So where's the power in that?

Yeah, but at least I've had the power.

For how long?

As long as I want to stay.

And that's what it's about for me. I mean, forget about the rest.

I know it's all right. I know there's nothing wrong with what I do. It's

harmless. It's fun.

I'm good at it.

I enjoy it.

That's not what's got me in here.

Can I say something?

What? There must have been times when it didn't feel good.

I don't know, it might sound awfully judgmental, but I think you're sort of

worth something more than that, really.

I don't know.

I just think this isn't what it's about.

I think I'm in here because I've got a drug problem, not because of my dancing.

OK, just a minute now, because what he's saying is that you're worth more than

that. You're selling yourself short.

What do you reckon, Bob?

Definitely not.

I'd be very worried about you going back out there and dancing on those tables

in front of all those lecturers, mate.

I don't see anything wrong with it personally.

I wondered when you'd come in, Jake.

No,

I don't. I mean, would you say the same about a ballerina?

Yeah, if she took her kit off.

You know, okay, the ballerinas keep their clothes on, but they still want

same thing.

Maybe you're just being honest.

If that's what you like, then that's what you like.

You know, I don't think we're here to judge everyone else. I think this is

Mel and her control.

And the fact that she goes home every night and she stuffs white powder up her

nose because she's so bloody miserable.

If the control meant that much to her, she wouldn't be doing that, Jake, would

she?

On the cross -addiction assessment, you know, I thought he was in for alcohol

primarily. Yeah, he is.

Well, it's not as high as protection from love addiction.

You know, he's got... Have you got anything from the family?

Well, just that he did have a big recording contract and they dropped him.

just dropped him.

Don't really know.

But since, he's just been drifting.

It affects love addiction. It comes out on top, yeah.

You know, he's a young, attractive man and all the rest of it, but he is

damaged.

He is actually not just putting it about and being...

the free and all the rest of it, he's getting damage from those.

And my concern is, how on earth are we going to help someone of his age to deal

with that and recognise that unless he deals with that, he's going to have long

-term problems with his alcohol.

I got into the office the other night.

Yeah, I got Jake's cross -addiction score.

It was a report. I know, it was great.

He's got such low score on his drink and drugs man.

He's fucking sky high.

He's 50 to the top.

He's 40.

40?

Well, that means he's been shagging for England then.

Yeah, and I'll tell you what, you'll like this one, Paul. He was up high on

as well.

Was he really? He was your antennae twitching. They probably would be, being

fellow doobie. I don't know more right about any antennae twitching.

He's a dark horse.

Yeah. May we ask whether that is a reef circle?

No, no, no. It's not a reef circle. Sure, it looks a bit.

Not a reef circle.

It's a... It doesn't smell like one.

Crikey. What is it in there?

Oh, blimey. Old hobnails.

Old something.

Old chag.

I'm talking of which.

Anything in a pot of stone.

You all right, mate? Hello, mate.

What's the problem?

Nothing much.

How are you doing?

I'm fine.

Yeah?

No,

listen, I was just wondering if... ..if you could sort me out with something.

I'm just not feeling too good.

Yeah,

but you finished your detox.

I can't give you any more value.

Yeah.

I'm not your drug dealer. I'm not here to give you drugs like that. I'm just

here to get you through your detox.

Please. Mm -mm.

Pretty, please.

Even with a fringe on top, you'll not get any more valium.

You've got to learn to do this, Jake, without medication.

You've got to learn to... Listen, I've had cancer in all day. What's it to you?

Can I just have something to sort myself out?

I'm not feeling too good and I want to fucking get some sleep and some rest

this people.

You can be as nut as you want, but the answer will still be no.

Well, thanks a lot.

Thanks a fucking lot.

Can I talk to one of your peers?

Talk to one of the others that have been through this. They've all got through

it. Oh, fuck off. Don't give me that.

I'm Laura, I'm an addict, and I feel pretty good today.

Um... I'm Jake and I'm fucking pissed off, basically.

I don't really feel part of this group. I don't feel I fucking fit in and I

don't understand why you've got problems about somebody jogging when they're

trying to get over some kind of fucking substance.

Surely it should be encouraged.

I don't understand what compulsive helping means. Surely you'd say, look,

you know, I can think of a lot worse things to do than compulsively fucking

help. You know, why is it... Why are these the kind of things that people

about in these groups? I just... I don't understand it.

I'm sort of wondering, you know, what's going on for you, Jake, underneath all

this anger and whether or not it's got anything to do with your SLA score.

I don't know what you're talking about. I don't fucking get that at all.

I don't even know what SLA is, to be honest.

Sex and love addiction.

Fuck. What the fuck does that mean?

What are you saying?

What are you saying now? What are you trying to fucking brainwash me? What are

you saying? We've got some fucking problem with sex.

Is that what everyone's fucking saying here?

Well, what was it you answered in the questionnaire?

You filled in the questionnaire.

What were the questions that seemed to be relating to relationships?

What were those ones?

Oh, fuck.

I can't handle this fucking shit. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.

Try and brainwash me. No, no, no.

Yeah, I'm going to sit down. Who do I speak to about getting out of this

All of us.

Well, I haven't really got much to say. I just want to

check out, really.

I haven't got anything to say.

I don't really feel this is the kind of place that I need to be or want to be.

I find, to be honest, I find it a bit creepy.

It is.

I don't really like the way the counsellors look at me. I find it quite

invasive. It is creepy.

Do you know why?

Why?

Because we see things.

We see where people are because we've been there ourselves.

Do you think I wanted treatment?

Laura, did you want treatment?

No.

It was the best thing I did, you know, and I wanted to go, and I was persuaded

to stay.

And, you know, what I'm thinking about now, you come in in a hell of a state,

OK, you've already paid your money, and why not just hang out and see how you

do?

I'm sorry, but I just want to talk about checking out.

Do you know, I don't know whether you remember what you were like when you

in, but I do, and you've only just started your detox, Jake. You're only

the door.

What is the rush to get out there? What have you got to go out to?

Really?

What have you got out there right now?

Your mum was telling us that you did really well as a singer. You've got a

voice.

And he just dropped you. Just like that.

Why was that?

So I've got to go to the toilet, actually.

It's okay.

You'll never find it.

Woof.

I'll come and see you as soon as I can.

All right?

Yeah.

Come and sit in the room and then we can chat. You look a bit a little isolated

over there.

You don't do isolation, do you? No.

No. What are you in for, Emma?

Oh, Coke.

Coke? Yeah.

Too much Coke.

Too much Coke.

Yeah.

You could have too much Coke.

Well, clearly you can.

Yeah. I bet you've had some fun with it, though, haven't you? Hell, yeah.

A little bit too much fun, maybe, with other people.

What's been happening, then?

You know, some mad nights, messing around.

You know, you end up with a big pile of it at a party and everybody's kicking

off and people get stupid and somebody gets punched and their glasses get

and they're screaming and... Emma, listen, it's OK, you know, you're my

and stuff. We're all a bit like that when we come in, you know, giving it the

big and... You don't have to kind of feel obliged, but, you know... Can you

fucking give it a break? You've just arrived.

What are you up to? I'm just trying to be friendly and stuff, that's all. Well,

that's really friendly, isn't it? You know, she's just trying to tell her

and you're telling her that she's talking shit, basically.

I didn't say she was talking shit. I actually said that's what we all do. I

that's what we all do. I didn't say that's what you... I'm happy just to get

everybody's case the moment they fucking arrive.

Do you know what I mean? Just arrive.

Jake, Jake, Jake, who's that on your case, then?

Oh, I might have known you'd get involved, Charlie. I might have known

you'd fucking get on the case. Oh, no, that was very interesting. No, you were

minding your own business, but all of a sudden... Emma, Charlie's in here for...

compulsive helping.

You know what I mean? I mean, does that give you some kind of idea about what

you're fucking getting involved in here?

Actually, you know, you can all laugh about that, but in fact it is very, very

serious, believe it or not. It does laugh a lot.

Eh?

What's that with you, Bob? Anyway, you're running out of dough. I bet that

little lump of yours is getting smaller and smaller and smaller, isn't it?

That's why you're playing such a mean game of chess.

Gotcha.

So, what are these?

The leg weights.

What do you do with the leg weights on? Can I just exercise them?

So why do you need to be doing that?

Because I spend a lot of time sitting around on my arse in here and I don't

to come out and go back to work.

Flabby. The length of time that you're in here, it's just not going to happen.

You know, my guess is that there is some underlying eating disorder there. There

is not.

Well, you know, you might not feel it right now.

You might not see it right now, Emma, but, you know, for you to be doing this,

especially in the garden where no one else is around... It's quiet, it's

peaceful. Yeah, and no one's going to see you.

But I'm not doing anything wrong. I just told you what I was doing. I'm just

wearing them and I'm exercising. I'm quite openly being... Hi, hello, I am

exercising.

Not here, you're not.

Because it's not going to help you. There's a football pitch and a tennis

And that's fine for those that don't have problems with their weight. I don't

have a problem with my weight. If you didn't have a problem, you wouldn't be

here, wandering around with weights on under your jeans. Look, I'm here because

I put coke up my nose. Hi, okay, guilty.

I'm not here because I've got an eating disorder.

The weights need to go, Emma, and, you know, it needs to take them

off.

Am I allowed to have anything?

Are you going to leave me with anything?

Yes, absolutely.

Absolutely, we're going to leave you with your feelings.

It

really

hurt. Well, no, not particularly. It didn't hurt at all. But it's just like,

don't know, this really fucked off. I just wish I could...

I just wish I could be happy without something having to go tits up, you

And something always seems to go tits up when I'm happy, which is why I'm

reluctant to be happy half the time. I mean, what's the point? Because, you

know, if I am, you know, it just doesn't...

So have you gone completely mad yet?

No, not yet.

Not you.

Jake, Emma, come on. Can you keep up with the rest of the group?

Can you stay with the group?

I'm Emma.

I'm an addict and I feel awkward.

I'm Lara.

I'm an addict bulimic and I feel a bit anxious, but pretty good and I'm here to

support you, Jake.

Well, I'm Jake.

I'm an alcoholic and I feel really good today, actually.

I feel pretty, pretty good.

Okay, so do you want to... Let's just pick up your book and see where

we go.

Okay, I admit that I'm powerless over the mood -altering substances,

and relationships that affect me and that my life has become unmanageable.

What does, you know, I admit I'm powerless mean to you?

Well, I've realised I drink too much and I'm going to change some things in my

life and move

forward, take some responsibility.

So everything in the garden is rosy then?

Is that what you're saying?

why not i've just i've just realized a few

things i've realized that um we've got a lovely foot attached

to a gorgeous leg she's got a beautiful foot yeah is there anything wrong with

that i'm an alcoholic okay um you know um

i used to drink for a reason Now, the reason it may not be important, but I

mean, you know, there were things, there were feelings that I used to

drink on, you know, things that I was worried about.

Well, for the most part, I've been having a really good time.

back to that, I'm sort of wondering what's preoccupying you.

Because you haven't taken your eyes off Emma's foot since you started.

Are you jealous?

No. Sure?

Absolutely. Don't get smart, Jake.

Do you have any questions?

Well, you deserve better than that, and so do I.

Now, if you want to mess around here, that's absolutely up to you, but I'm not

going to do it.

So here you are then.

Okay, come out of denial, because there was a lot of denial in your first step.

Yes. And you think, you really think that you've got to grips with it this

Yes, I do. I feel I can start to move through these steps and

make some changes.

And, yeah,

that's what I want to do.

And I feel good.

OK, well, let's see how you do.

But I have to say, it sounds like bullshit to me.

I started having sex when I was nearly 14.

And I was kind of over it by the time I was 16 and stayed over

it for a couple of years because everybody else was doing it by that

they were all talking about it and it had gotten kind of boring.

But I did start early.

But then I had a bit of a weird start to it all.

I had a run -in with my uncle.

And he and the family would come over for New Year's Eve when we were younger.

Must have been about 12, 11, 12.

And when we were doing the round of New Year's Eve midnight kissing, he put his

tongue in my mouth and just looked at me.

as if I was supposed to.

I don't know.

And then that summer, he took me to the building fight with the dog.

And he put lipstick on me.

Peach neon.

And then...

He put his hands over my hands and he tossed himself off on my stomach.

My tummy.

I think that's really... Can I just say, I just think that's really brave of you

to talk about that.

We have a problem.

The garden's just found a lump of black in the hedge.

And it's obviously not been there too long because it's not... It's not even

white.

What's wrong with you?

It just brings up feelings for me. I think I'm going to keep getting rid of

Charlie to Curtis for playing football.

Pulled him up in his car and he's gonna go back on the pitch now to play again

to try to work it off What would you say?

What do you make of

this Jake I Just can't be bothered with it anymore I Just can't be bothered

talking about this fucking exercise shit anymore to be honest Why do you think

why do you think we ever talk about it?

You know, I mean, just leave the guy alone.

He's just trying to sort his life out.

About one third of the patients who come here relax.

And as far as I'm concerned, as the director, that's not good enough.

I want more people to go to get well.

So why would I be worried about Paul's exercise when he's scoring 42 out of 50

on exercise addiction?

How many did you throw?

Three, four. Three, four, wasn't it?

So I'm not worried about Bob at all.

But I am worried about someone who throws 42 out of 50.

Because that's keeping his addictive tendency ticking over.

What do you see when you look at Emma apart from a beautiful girl?

Why, for example, might she be rubbing her nose?

Nice lovely nose and all the rest of it, but why...

Because she's in a room full of insane people.

This I've never met before.

I'll give you a couple of suggestions.

Perhaps she's embarrassed about something and she just wants to scratch

nose.

That's one suggestion.

Do you think of any other reason why Emma might be scratching her nose?

My nose always used to go like that.

But what's Emma been doing?

Why is she here?

What's she been doing with her nose, Emma?

you cocaine up it.

It's not exactly rocket science, this doesn't fizzle.

No.

Why don't you need to put cocaine up your nose then?

What did you do it for?

Fun. You wanted?

Yeah. Yeah, you was. Quite right.

Did it make you feel better?

Yeah. Did it give you a high? Yep. Did it make you feel happy with your

Yep. All of those things.

Then what are you doing here?

Welcome. And we're here to try to help you get better.

Unfortunately, the cane is artificial.

What happens is you borrow the high.

And you have to pay it back.

And you have to pay it back with a crash.

Most commonly, people who come here with cocaine or crack addiction run away.

They tend not to come back afterwards.

But we do understand how difficult it is.

And you've got a lot of courage to speak here.

You feel that, Jake, when you start being honest about your feelings?

Nobody's been frightened away.

We're all right in there alongside you.

Oh, shit.

Fuck's sake.

May I remind you two, and I quote,

exclusive attachments interfere with treatment.

I say more.

Hello, mate. Hi. How you doing?

Yeah, I... Not... not alright.

Okay, well... Got something here to, uh, lighten the mood, perhaps?

Banned substances.

Real coffee.

Something I would...

I was with Emma and we were kissing and stuff and

my mind wanted to be there, you know,

but I couldn't get

it up.

It's like, I don't know, do you really want to have this relationship?

I mean, here you are in treatment, you know, for the first time for ages,

actually clean and sober and you're having feelings.

She comes in, she's the same.

She's vulnerable, not emotionally vulnerable, but she's fragile.

Charlie, I was naked with a beautiful woman in the shower.

Yeah. I couldn't get it up. Yeah, yeah.

You see, the thing is, you know, before it hasn't really mattered to you because

you've been out of your face, you've been doing something.

So you've just gone for it and, you know, it really didn't matter.

And the consequences, you could mop them up the next day. But this time,

actually, it did. You're sober, you're clean and sober, relatively, all right?

You know, so your conscience is in operation and all the rest of it.

You know, I think, you know, it just didn't feel.

It didn't feel right because it wasn't right, simple as that.

So guess what?

You've got a conscience.

You know, guess what?

I've got the meeting.

I'll see you later, yeah?

How are you doing?

Fine, yeah.

You're better than last week.

You're aware that we did a ring search, aren't you?

Sorry? You're aware that we did a room search?

Yeah. Okay.

Okay, do you want to take your hand off the bed, please?

Okay, off you pop.

I'll tell you what I'm going to do.

Emma, I'm going to put you on plating.

We're going to plate your food for you.

Now what that will mean is that the chef will put your portions out for you so

that we know that you're getting enough to eat.

Okay. Well, you know, when you came in, you said that you haven't got a problem

with it. So if it's not a problem, it won't be a problem. What it will mean is

that your food will come out and you'll be able to get it straight away.

That's fine.

Yeah, it's going straight to the kitchen again. And we're doing that because we

found some laxatives in your room.

And it's important that you look at that while you're here.

What's that black thing?

Eat man, don't take the feelings away.

Gotta have that as well.

Look,

rule number one is you're not supposed to be in here discussing with your

You know that, but all you need to do is just... Your plate is for the moment

for a reason which is beyond me. It's a clinical reason. And beyond me. Beyond

me. Beyond me. Well, at the moment, just go with it and just finish it. Don't

have to do all the rush. I'm going to be ill. No, you won't. Don't exaggerate.

You just have to just get through it.

Brilliant champ. Mashed potato.

Chives. Please, Patrick.

No, please, darling. Just exit with your plate.

That's the way you should be eating it. I can't eat it. Yes, you can. I can't.

Take your time.

Bless you.

Bob. Bobby.

What's up?

Listen, can you sort this out for us both?

No, you're joking.

Why?

We're in a treatment centre, man.

We're not allowed to use. Come on.

What are you doing?

What's wrong with you?

You don't want to be too nice to me?

I'm fine.

I'm not.

How are you?

I'm all right, yes.

You're okay?

Yeah.

I'll get straight to the point, really.

Bob was given a urine test, and his urine test had actually come up positive

amphetamine.

All right, which he sort of says, I've never used. He says, I've never used

amphetamines. And he said that you actually gave him a urine sample.

What?

That's why I asked, what's going on for you?

Really? Right.

Fucking bastards.

He told you that?

That's what he said.

Fucking hell, that's really out of order.

Trying to do him a favour, you know.

You know, Paul, you're not helping Bob by enabling him to cheat like that.

You know, you said you thought you were helping him, but...

Maybe you were doing something for yourself.

But what about the drugs that you've always been using, then?

At least you're gonna wanna know, yeah, fuck.

Yeah, if you've got anything, you need to hand it over.

All right, all right.

Is that all of them?

Yeah. Is that everything?

Yeah. Okay.

Oh, shit, you're gonna tuck me out now.

No.

No, in fact... I feel quite positive about it because you've got two things

you've been using on.

Okay? Your amphetamines and your exercise.

And I've been giving up. Now, okay, you can have all sorts of feelings about

that, but that's what we need to get to.

Do you want to get better or not?

No, take it off. Come on.

Take it off. I was getting better. I am better. You were getting better with a

dash of cannabis in the gut.

That is not getting better, that's getting worse.

Do you want to make it clear to me or not? I just want to clear this with you

once and for all. Do you want to get better or not?

I think that's why I'm here. I think everyone knows that. I know it's why

here, but I want to know whether it's your motive rather than your mother's or

your wife's or anybody else's.

May I say, you well know it's my wife and my mum.

I'm doing this for my daughter.

It's not going to work.

If you're going to get better, you're going to need to do it for yourself. Do

you want to get better? I keep coming back to the same question. Do you want

get better?

I want something.

All right, I'll settle for that.

I'll settle for that.

You know, if it's just 10 % of you wants to get better, I'll settle for that.

That's fine.

I'll work with that.

So if we move on to Paul.

I don't think it's just Paul. I wouldn't like just to say it's you, Paul.

We all know we've all...

Madam Helper over there and what's been going on yesterday.

Are you fucking calling me Madam Helper?

Which do you object to, Helper or Madam? Madam!

I think not.

I think you're perfectly happy with Madam that you're objecting to the

Actually, I don't feel like acknowledging anything.

I don't know, I feel I'm pure of the driven snow at the moment. Everyone else

has been using, fucking copulating, smoking dope, using amphetamines.

You know, and I've become the sort of the standard joke of the party. And as

rightly said, it's not funny, compulsive helping. Now I'm fed up with sort of,

you know.

That's all.

Charlie?

You acknowledge your alcoholism?

Hmm.

Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

Yes, I have.

Years and years ago, yes.

Years and years ago. So it's history, huh?

Well, no, it's not history. I do, yes, acknowledge it on an ongoing basis, yes.

Now tell us about the past.

When you bail people out of their trouble, what happens, Charlie?

When you take the wrath of somebody else, what happens?

I think in the end I get very resentful.

You know, just like I'm feeling now.

I'm a bit preoccupied with what's happening over here. There's

going on with the people over there.

What, with Emma and Jake? Yeah, there's a lot of body language that just

distracted me there. I found it difficult.

Sarah, there's a relationship going on between Jake and Emma.

Why do you want it? Do you want to bail them out or do you want to cancel them

out?

Well, to be honest with you, I was shocked. I was shocked.

What bay?

I was shocked at the fact that, you know, two of them start bollock naked,

this case, or in my shower room.

I think you'll find it's my shower room. Well, our shower room. Our shower room.

I mean, congratulations if that's what you want.

It is fine. Well done. You've actually managed to take your clothes off in

of a woman. Thank you. What a grown -up thing to do.

Do you think it helps her recovery?

I don't see why what people... I don't see why people have got a problem with

the fact that me and Emma have found something. We feel... We feel like we're

connected.

What's the issue?

Well, shall we ask Emma?

Ask Emma? Okay, what's the issue, Emma?

So you come to a treatment centre in order to...

Make your assets freely available to the native? Not in order to, I didn't know

it was going to happen.

It was a big surprise, was it? Yeah.

Anything incompatible about that sort of behaviour in a treatment centre?

Or is it just part of this? I suppose it might irritate other people.

Huh? We weren't, like, setting out to be discovered.

No rip to you.

No rip to you.

No rip to Jake.

In what way?

Well, I'll show you in what way.

Let's look at Paul for a moment.

What's he here for?

Speed. And they keep trying to stop him from exercising.

Yes.

What was the diagnosis when you came in, Paul?

Well, it was various, you know, coke, booze. Yeah, sure.

So he came in as a paid -up member of the addict club.

Now, why is he going to relax?

Hasn't cancelled his subscription yet.

He's still a paid -up member of the addict club.

And he doesn't actually care what sort of addict it is.

He'll use because something makes him feel different.

But why would Paul use amphetamines in particular?

Why would he go for speed?

What does speed do to you?

It's smarter.

Makes me able to keep going.

So expertise to Paul is significant.

That's simple.

And why would Emma find it so difficult to challenge you?

Because she's using herself.

But she isn't.

No. I'm not using anything.

I haven't had anything since I came in. You're using him.

I'm not.

Don't tell him to fuck off. Well, it's fucking bullshit, isn't it? I'm not

him at all.

No, I don't mean you. I don't mean you. What's the problem? What's the problem?

What's your problem with the fact that we're staring at you?

It's the same thing.

What's it?

It's the same because it's, you know, whether it's having a fuck or whether

having a line of Charlie, whether it's me. It's not the same thing. It's

completely different. It is. It is.

It is the same thing. It is because you're just doing it because basically

can't, like the rest of us, we're getting away from, this is why it's feel

No, you're not saying that love is something that you use.

No, what I'm saying is I haven't come here to fuck, you know.

I've come here to get well.

What do you mean he wants to fuck you?

I don't know.

That's on the book.

I don't know. Well, it doesn't seem that anyone would be a fucking cocky cunt.

No.

That's not what it is.

Well, Emma, what's it feel like to be a tablet?

I'm not even going to answer that.

I think it's a rather undignified position, isn't it?

To be a tablet for somebody else.

I'd rather be a human being in my own right. Are you trying to make me feel

a whore?

No, I'm saying you're a tablet to Jake.

If you want a close relationship, you will have to postpone it.

Promise, there has to be a safe place.

And we cannot afford to have exclusive relationships in here.

You will, both of you, be discharged from treatment if you go on having a

personal relationship of that nature. I will not tolerate it.

Okay.

You got the gear? Yeah, money first.

Hey, the owner.

Cheers, man.

See you, baby.

Next time. Ta -ra.

Day five.

Admit to God, to myself and to another human being the exact nature of my

wrongs.

Why are you out here?

There's been so many, and I didn't know where to start.

And it's about being really honest, and it's a bit alien to me.

Shall I start? The first one I put, stealing from my parents,

which I'm really sad and ashamed about, because they didn't have very much

money, and I stole from them for quite a number of years.

And I stole jewellery from my mum and I pawned it.

And I snipped 20s out of my dad's wallet.

Friends aren't quite uncomfortable to talk about.

I used to be really proud to be this dancing girl.

And I felt anyone who'd listen, especially men, because I thought it

them want me more.

I thought it made me seem really exciting and wild and crazy and just,

now I feel quite embarrassed.

I felt like I was really in control when I was dancing for men.

Now I look in it and I can see it was the other way around.

I feel quite embarrassed now, actually.

I feel like the room's gone quiet.

I think I'm being judged.

I'm not judging you at all. I think it takes a lot of balls to do what you were

doing. It takes a lot of balls to talk about it now.

I used to get

so angry with myself at night after I'd been out or

anything. I'd just want to calm down and I'd...

I started smashing my head against the wall.

Just head -butting the wall.

Thump, thump, thump.

I'd just cry.

I'd cry and cry and then I'd wake up in the morning and I'd have a big bruise on

my head.

Part of me wanted to show everyone the bruise.

I wanted everyone to see that I had a bruise on my head.

That I'd hurt myself and they could see my pain.

They all just thought I was crazy, I suppose.

I know that's gonna produce it now.

I feel that my... My uncle had abused me.

And it wasn't true.

Feel for me.

Feel like I was one of you.

And I'm listening to what Mel's saying.

I'm realising that I've got to do something about... me.

I should have gotten involved with the shape.

I

haven't

got anything left for me to give, to not work out.

Thanks. Thanks for making me feel like a complete fucking idiot.

Thanks for making me feel like a fucking prick.

I'm trying to be honest.

Why couldn't you have been honest with me, Emma?

Why couldn't you have told me? What was you scared of? I thought that we trusted

each other. I thought that we had something together.

Because that's what I've always done.

Oh, what, are you going to start crying now?

You're going to start crying. I'll fucking thank the Lord. You fucking lied

about your fucking uncle to me.

This made me feel fucking sick.

I'm sorry. You didn't mean to say that.

I'm sorry. Can you sleep?

No. Don't run away from me. No.

I'm doing it.

God, you were alone, man.

You were alone.

I just read you part of this from the preamble.

From observing and confronting the dishonesties, you know, think you?

Deception, distortion, diversion, delusion, evasions, rationalizations,

justifications and psychological gameplay.

Any of that mean anything to you?

Delusional.

I was thinking rather more practical terms.

What do you suppose is the result of your urine testing?

Bearing in mind that I already know the answer.

Well, marijuana, coke, a bit of alcohol.

You've been in long enough, Tom, to know that not only is that unacceptable,

but you actually brought it in here, didn't you?

Because I've got the results of the other urine test as well.

or do you reckon I should do it to you Bob?

give you a firm warning ask you to tell me about your childhood

what do you think?

if you had simply damaged yourself by taking something

that would be one thing

So you brought drugs in here, and that risks other people.

And I don't tolerate that.

You're going to be discharged from treatment as of now.

You're going to go.

Cheers, guys.

See you.

See you, boss.

Which is sad.

But that's who it is.

I do not tolerate people taking risks with other people's lives.

He can come back some other time when he wants to take it seriously, but not

now.

I am determined to make this place safe.

Did someone do it to you or did you do it to yourself?

I suspect you did it to yourself, Mel.

Is that right?

You don't need to do this. You don't need an entrance fee to talk about your

feelings.

Come and tell us before you do this sort of thing.

Take my labour to the nursing station, will you?

Come on, mate.

It's going to go down. Come on.

I don't know, but I suspect she did that to herself.

Why do you suppose she would do that?

Because you don't feel safe.

Yeah.

Well, the environment's safe.

We're safe.

That's what I do. I keep the place clean.

But she doesn't feel safe.

It takes a lot of guts to come into treatment.

There's the temptation and the opportunity all the time to go back to

were, to run away and, you know, go back to the old business.

But if you stay here and work through it, it takes a lot of guts.

What's going on?

I don't want to do this again.

I just don't know any other way to express myself.

And you're not all doing what it is that you're doing.

Is it about the party last night?

Part of it. Part of it. I just don't know.

You know, you're not all just out having a good time and using it.

Because no one even thought to invite me.

Because you think I'm so strong.

It's like you all think I'm doing so fucking well.

I ain't. I ain't doing well.

I ain't doing well.

Where are you going to go?

I'm going home.

No,

no, no, no, it happened.

I just thought I'd, um... Still don't know that I'm going.

No, I don't.

I just made a decision.

I'm ready to go.

What's come up for you today, to have you come up here in this sort of state?

I just feel that I don't... I can't really... I can't watch people hurt

themselves. I'm really afraid of what I'm going to do. I don't really know who

am or where I'm going.

And I just want to go home.

And I know what I'm going to do. I'm going to go through the meetings. I'm

to sort my life out. I'm going to take responsibility. And it's taken being

to make me aware of those things.

If you go home right now, Jake, you're going to be dead in the water.

There's obviously a lot of stuff that's come up for you in group today. Look at

the state you're in.

I actually feel quite good.

Jake, you don't look it. You shake it.

You're obviously going through a lot of pain at the moment. Look at you, man.

Look, guys, if you take yourself off out there now, you're going to end up

using.

I'm not going to do that. I don't feel good about that. I wouldn't want to do

that now. You've done some really nice work while you've been here.

It would be a shame to trash that.

The time that you have spent here has evoked a lot of feelings in you. You're

starting to change, whether you like it or not, Jake.

Look, Lara, I'm really sorry.

All right? I'm really, really sorry.

I really appreciate what you've done for me. You don't have to do this.

Thank you.

Jake, we're not going to enable you either. We won't take you down the

It's okay.

If you need to come back, Jake, come back.

Hello, sir.

How are you doing?

I'm alright, mate.

What can I get you?

Double vodka, please.

Certainly.

Do you want to go in here and sit down?

I'll be with you in a minute, okay?

My name's Paul. I'm an alcoholic.

I'm an addict. I feel really tired.

Hi, I'm Mel.

I'm an addict. I feel okay.

I'm Charlie.

I'm an addict. I'm an alcoholic.

A compulsive helper.

And I feel absolutely done in. I'm really tired and sleepy. I don't know

is, but...

Anyway, yeah. I'm Lara. I'm an addict for Lenick, and I feel pretty good.

I'm Pete.

I'm all right.

What are you here for, Pete?

Just a bit of drinking problems.

OK, well, you've just arrived?

Yeah. Welcome.

Hello,

everyone, again.

I'm Jake.

I'm an alcoholic and an addict and I feel a

bit nervous but ready to make some changes.