All language subtitles for Beavis and Butthead S01E01 Blood Drive

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Original subtitles

Psychokillers, a little med school is a terrible thing.

Give me your pancreas.

I'll be back for your spleen. Arnold Schwarzenegger is the intern.

Starts Friday.

Whoa, that looks cool.

Yeah, we could go if we had some money.

This sucks.

Look under her butt.

That dude's fat.

Yeah.

He's gonna powder his butt.

Yeah.

That was cool.

Whoa. That looks cool.

Let's watch something cool.

Yes!

Before I go to bed, I take it to my fingers. I take it to my brain. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Oh, no.

Oh, no.

Oh,

no.

I take it to my fingers. I take it to my brain. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

20, 20, 24 hours ago.

I won't be sedated.

Nothing to do, nowhere to go.

I won't be sedated.

Just put me in a wheelchair and get me to the shore.

Hurry, hurry, hurry.

I can't control my fingers. I can't control my toes. Oh, no.

Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. I want to be deleted.

Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad.

I want to be deleted.

Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad.

I want to be deleted.

Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad.

I want to be deleted.

What do you think they pay for, like, a gallon of blood?

Just be cool, dude.

Don't take their first offer.

How do they, like, get it out, dude?

They give you a big knife, then you cut your hand and, like, bleed into a

bucket.

That's cool.

They give you a big old bottle of Mad Dog 2020 to drink first.

High test.

And then when you're done, don't forget to stand up really fast.

If you're lucky, you'll pass out. Cool.

Whoa, we're gonna be rich.

Yep, you boys?

We got blood.

And a good thing, too.

Ha! Wanna buy some?

Now, let me see. Is either one of you boys 18 or older?

Uh, no.

Okay. Have you been screened in the last 12 months for diseases of the

circulatory system?

No.

Okay. Either of you boys on any kind of medication?

Good enough. Beggars can't be choosers. That's what I say.

Roll up your sleeves and sit down, boys. Hey, what about the mad dog?

Yeah, don't we get anything first?

Yep, the enduring thanks of the community.

Ah!

Okay, now, as soon as them baggies are filled up, you'll be on your... Ah,

shoot. I'll be back with you boys in a minute.

Blood Drive?

Tyler? Where are you calling from?

You can't just...

Of course I sound mad. I buried your three children, see you through detox

times, then you vanished for 15 years, and after all that time you call me at

work? How bad do you think I missed you?

Well, guess again.

You're the saddest excuse for a... Oh my gosh, I gotta go. Come over around

nine, Tyler, and wear that mesh undershirt.

Well, boys, I'm awful sorry. I feel like I left the house with the tub running.

Now, let's see. It appears you fellas are getting up a little more than you

bargained for. Tell you what.

Here's a Fig Newton for each of you. Now, why don't y 'all just forget about

your blood donation for today since you're looking a little peaky. What say

two go on home and come back when you're feeling a little better?

Thank you, boys.

I want to taste everything from your

lipstick to your toenail polish.

Okay, brother.

I want to hold you. I want to massage you. I want to comfort

you. I want to sue you.

You know the way you're standing still, I want to just lay on you, blow a big

love to your shadow.

Sound silly, don't it?

Not really.

Let me come over here.

Let me sue you here.

Hold your ear, and I do that with you.

Okay.

Because tonight, girl, all of me wants all of you.

Ooh, baby.

That dude's pitching a tent.

Change it.

Kick -ass.

Yeah.

Kick -ass.

Hey, I feel like killing myself.

I feel like killing you.

Thank you.

They're guilty.

See you in hell, Rob Helford.

This dude is old.

Mephisto's House of Hot Tubs is a great place for a soak.

A choke.

Or a poke.

Bloodbath. You may not get clean, but you'll never have to wash again.

Starts Friday in a bad neighborhood theater near you.

Bloodbath. That sounds cool.

Cool.

Cafeteria food.

There's a crack in the mirror and a blood stain on the floor. Cool name.

Front face!

Oh,

you are a vampire, baby.

I'm a walking dead.

Oh, you are a vampire, baby. I'm a walking dead. Yeah.

I like that.

Cool.

These guys are cool.

You take a mortal man and

put him in control.

Watch him become a god.

Watch people hit the road.

Whoa.

Cool.

Grandpa Buster.

Whoa. A peaceful man.

Yeah.

Whoa.

Yeah.

They must stay in the room.

That was cool.

Fire is cool.

This

sucks.

Change it. No way. Check out this chick.

Ha, ha, ha.

Ha,

ha, ha.

I am God, I can do whatever I want.

I can feed whomever I choose.

I can feed my dinner in a fancy

restaurant.

If you sat on her head, would it scratch your butt?

Yeah.

Here's my story.

Sad, but true.

About a girl that I once knew.

She broke my heart. I was so unglued that I was startled when she called.

Hey, dude.

Dude, dude, dude.

Ooh,

baby.

I made a week out of you like today.

This story can start in a year or two without being survived to see.

The California sunshine deceived my baby.

I've been looking for you to die.

When a big dog like y 'all look fine. I've been looking, looking at him. I

it was fine.

Looked her by the hand.

Hey, dude!

Don't do it! Don't call me! Don't do it!

Trick photography.

Don't do it! Don't do it!

Chainsaw is cool.

Yeah.

I like when they saw it up.

Did you see Scarface?

That was cool.

Yeah.

When they took the chainsaw and saw that dude's arms off. Yeah.

That was cool.

These guys are cool.

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