Original subtitles

What's up, Jimmy?

Yo, what's up, bro? Glad you made it. Dude, what is this? This is a whole

project I've been working on for weeks, bro. This is the ChronoTron 3000.

It's our very own time machine, man.

Our very own time machine? Are you sure, bro? Yeah.

Are you for real? Are you just going to erase us from existence or something,

dude? Are you sure this thing is safe, Jimmy? Yeah, bro. I'm just dialing up

last few things. I've checked out all the safety protocols.

It's going to work. There's nothing going to go wrong. We're going to go

the year of 1985.

All right. Are you sure we're not going to just erase our existence or

something, dude? What?

No, bro. I've done tons of research on it. What happens if I click this button

right here, though? Don't do that.

Don't do that. That might be bad, bro.

Gotcha. Hold on.

You ready to go back to 1985?

Why 1985?

For real?

Come on, man. Why 1985?

Look, 1985 was the pinnacle.

of the human race. It was when the arts and the sciences and, you know,

everything that we know of was all created.

We need to go back and experience that and learn from it and become famous and,

you know, a lot of women and all that, you know what I mean?

I mean, shit, if you say so.

Oh, yeah. By the way, can I see your phone for a second?

Yeah, sure.

All right.

I'm going to download this little app real quick for you.

What the hell? All right.

Okay, so this is what's going to send us off. All right? So we just got to turn

that on.

Make sure everything's connected.

Here we go.

This is going to be our time machine to get back.

We're just going to hit the little button. It's going to send us straight

to reality.

Whatever you think, bro. Perfect.

You're the genius.

You got to download them, type in the year of 1985, and we are golden. We're

going to go. Hold on. Should we do this?

How does all this stuff work again? Are you sure about this?

All right, look. With the frequencies, the vibrations, the harmonics, I know

probably wouldn't understand anything about that.

But look, when it all comes together and it's all calibrated together, it makes

a time machine, believe it or not. And we're about to use it to go back to

All right.

You ready?

Let's go. I'm ready when you are.

Are you sure about this, bro? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Once that gets downloaded, we're going to calibrate these two together.

So this is going to calibrate with that.

All right. You ready to go, 1585?

Let's do this. You ready?

Press that button.

Just don't kill us, man. No, we're good. We're good. You sure?

Yeah, let's go.

All right.

Here we go.

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit.

Bro, is this supposed to sound like this?

Oh, shit. What the fuck? It's so loud. Holy shit.

We're going to die.

Oh, shit.

Where the fuck are we?

Dude, we made it. What the?

We're in 1985.

85?

I thought you said 95.

Oh, my God.

Bro, you idiot.

How are you going to think I'm for the wrong year?

Might be, bro.

But, I mean, what the fuck?

Where the fuck are we, lady?

Wait a minute.

I know this couch.

That table.

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.

This is crazy.

Dude,

we're in my grandma's house from 1995.

What the hell?

I mean, where did we think we were going to spawn, honestly?

I don't even know.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Do you hear that?

I bet that's my mom.

What? When she was 18.

She's probably hot.

Right?

We gotta be quiet, because it can change everything if we're spotted.

I mean... Do you hear that, though?

How the hell are we gonna get out of here?

Let's go check it out. Come on.

Oh, shit.

Yeah. Yeah, did you see Tommy in algebra class?

I know. It's so crazy.

He definitely got detention, for sure.

Yeah, I don't know.

I'm not sure, but it was so crazy. Like, what's wrong with people?

Yeah, I have some homework and stuff, but I can hang out later.

Yeah, definitely.

Yeah, I'm down to go to the mall.

I have a lot of homework, though, so I guess we'll see.

Yeah, it's crazy.

Okay, girl, I'll talk to you later. I have to go.

Okay, bye.

Oh, my God.

Joey Lawrence's butt is so fucking cute.

Like, I would have that man's baby.

Yeah, but he's no Jordan Cannellino.

Oh, my so -called life.

I think I hear my stepmom's voice.

She's here, too.

So do you think we'll ever end up with guys like that?

He's saying the boys at our school. They're disgusting.

Not even kiss -worthy, much less, you know.

You know, like what?

Like sex?

Don't be a prude.

You know what I mean. That's besides the point. Boys are gross.

Mm -hmm.

So what does that mean?

You're a lesbian?

No, I'm not a lesbian.

I kissed a girl once, and I really liked it.

Shut up, liar.

Yeah. It was summer camp, 1993, a couple years ago. And I want to tell you the

girl's name.

But we sat up all night long making out until the sun came up. I could

taste her, like, cherry chapstick on my lips, and it was so fucking hot.

And now I masturbate to it all the time. It gets the job done.

Oh, my gosh.

Mm -hmm. So, like, what do you think about when you masturbate? Ew, no.

Come on.

Do you think about big, hard, veiny dick?

Or do you think about... Sweet, soft little pussies.

Ew, no.

I'm going to tell you.

Well, have you ever even kissed a girl?

No. No?

Mm -mm.

Well, you don't know until you try, if you like it.

I don't think I'm into girls.

How about you close your eyes, and we just try it out.

See if you like it.

Okay. Yeah.

What? Who are you guys and how did you get into my room? I mean, who are we?

We're the new neighbors. We just came by to say hi.

Yeah. New neighbors?

We don't have any new neighbors. Besides, you don't know how to knock?

I'm a criminal medicine.

You mean your mom medicine?

Yeah.

Okay.

Well, where did you come from?

We just moved in. Yeah, yeah, we're like a couple of houses down.

Maybe you guys can like show us around the new neighborhood.

Okay, so what do you want?

Hold on a second, hold on a second.

So you guys are kind of hot, right?

Yeah, but they look really familiar.

They're talking such a twerk.

Like, have we met them before?

Yeah, I feel like we've totally met them before or something, but... Let's do

this.

We have been waiting for...

Yeah, that's true. But, like, I swear I've, like, met them before.

I just can't put my finger on, like, where they're from.

I don't know. I have a bad feeling about this.

I mean, we really messed up the timeline, for real.

What do you mean, dude?

That's what we built the time machine for. We need to go back and fix it.

Technically, yes.

But... Are you down, though?

Yeah. Yeah. Okay, cool.

So we decided you guys are pretty cool and you can hang.

Hang? Yeah, we'll hang. We'll hang.

So, um, where did you guys come from? Because those are really weird clothes.

Did you just, like, get off of work or something?

Um, no, we're just, uh, we're just, like, influencers, you know?

TikToks and stuff.

TikTok? TikTok?

Um, yeah, we just... We're from Cali. We're from Cali.

Okay. Yeah,

I guess so.

You guys can't be hanging out with us looking like that. You definitely look

like a couple of dorks.

Dorks? Really need a makeover.

Makeover!

Okay,

sit down.

Sit down.

Oh, shh. Be careful there.

Oh, shh.

That's why I know it'll square.

Take this off.

Nice. Much, much better.

Okay.

Oh, my God. I know who they remind me of now.

They do look exactly like our older brothers.

Oh, my God.

That's so crazy. Where did you guys say you came from?

California. California.

Okay, it's fate.

We gotta do it. We could lose our virginity.

I mean,

he's totally my type.

Okay, fuck it.

Let's do it. Let's do it.

Yes.

That's fucking.

Okay, fuck it. We'll come back. Fuck it. That happens.

We got this.

Awesome.

Okay, just jump, bro. Just jump.

All right. All right. All right. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm

done. I'm done. I'm done.

I'm done.

So it's okay. We got it. I got it.

Okay? Yeah.

Oh, shit.

This is so fun.

So fun.

I know.

Thank you.

Wow.

We're full of you.

It's so fucking good.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh,

my God.

Yeah.

Oh my god, it feels so fucking good.

It's so good.

Music.

Oh, Jesus.

Fuck me.

Thank you.

Holy fuck. Oh, fuck you.

Oh, yes, give it to me. Please, please, please.

Yes.

Yes. Yes.

It's been a while.

I see all of that stuff.

I'm sorry.

Yes.

Yes. Yes.

Yes.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my

God.

You look so much like my fucking brother.

You look so much like my mom.

He's so fucking hot.

Oh, my God. Is that pussy fucking good or what?

Is that pussy good, bro?

Yeah? Fucker.

Oh,

yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Holy shit.

Holy shit. That's so fucking good.

Holy shit.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

You said you didn't like girls, huh?

Fuck. Fuck.

Fuck.

Oh, my

God.

It's like that.

It's like that, yeah.

It's like that fucking happy, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's so fucking good.

Oh, my God.

Fuck you, fuck your fucking brother. Oh

my

god. They look so much like

our brothers.

Yeah, they do look like our fucking brothers. It's so fucking hot.

Oh my god. It turns me on. Fuck.

Cheers. Cheers. Cheers.

Cheers.

I suck my fucking pussy off of this

dick.

Put it back. Yes.

Oh,

yes. Fuck it. Yes. Oh, yes.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, my fucking God. Oh, my God.

Oh, I can feel your tongue on my fucking foot. It's so fucking hot.

Fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking.

Put

it

back in the fucking hole.

He is fucking cool with that fucking pussy.

Oh, shit.

but you just put it back in there.

Oh my God.

I don't want to feel your dick.

Can we swap?

Let's fucking swap.

So much like our fucking brothers.

I know.

Yes,

yes, yes.

Oh, my goodness.

Oh,

shit.

Oh, fuck, man.

Fuck, yeah.

Oh, my

God.

Oh, my God.

Like, oh, yeah.

Fuck.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that's it.

I hope you're not.

Oh my god,

it's

so fucking good.

Oh, my God. So fucking good.

Oh,

my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Thank you.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, my

God.

Thank you.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, fuck yes.

Yes, bro, save me.

It's okay.

It's okay.

Oh, my God.

Fire. Fire.

Oh, God, yes, yes, yes.

It's so fucking hot in here.

Oh,

God,

yes, yes, yes.

Yes, yes.

Oh,

God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Look at my tight pussy.

Look at my tight pussy.

I fucking love you. Oh, my God. Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God.

You like the look of my tight pussy, Joe? I love that tight pussy, Joe.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh,

my God.

Oh, my God. Oh,

my God.

Oh,

my God. Oh, my God.

Oh,

my God. Oh,

my God.

Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.

Fuck you.

Oh my God.

Oh my

God.

It was so much fun.

So much fun.

Totally rad. Pretty crazy.

Ooh, what is that?

No, wait.

Wait, wait, wait.

Where did they go?

What just happened?

What the heck?

What the fuck happened? What's the time machine?

The truth of who your real father is is even so stranger.

You gotta come over right now. It smells like the 90s.

Oh my God. I knew it. I knew it. It's them.