Original subtitles

Cora, guess what? I got ESP.

You don't have no ESP. See, I knew you was going to say that.

What makes you think you have ESP?

Because, Cora, I was in there in the bathroom, and I was using the bathroom,

I heard Nephew come to that door, and I know what he was going to say before he

said it.

So what did he say?

He said, uh, hurry up. I got to use it.

You know, my mind is amazing.

That's one way to describe it.

Oh, so you don't believe me, do you? I'll tell you what.

Think of a number between one and three, but don't use one or three. Watch this.

Exactly.

That's what I was about to say. You know, I think I'm psychotic.

Yes, I am.

Has anybody seen my book bag?

It's in the living room.

Look,

this is getting out of hand. I'm just.

Now, who could that be?

Wait a minute. Hold on. Let me guess.

That is.

Good morning.

Simone, y 'all could just call me Wadini.

Would you stop that?

Simone, what are you doing here? And why are you coming through our back door?

Well, you see... Oh, no, no, I can tell you what she's about to do. See, she's

running from the po -po. She needs somewhere to hide out, so she came here.

No, I knocked at the front door, but nobody answered.

If you let me finish, I was going to say you knocked at the front door, but

nobody didn't answer. That's what I was about to say.

Will you stop it?

Well, I just came by to walk to school with you.

Simone, you have to pass the school to get over here.

I know that building looked familiar.

Girl, do they give you grades on your report card, or do they just put little

smiley faces on it?

Wait, wait, let me guess what they do.

Mr. Brown, let me guess. Can you guess what I'm going to do with this pot if

don't cut that mess out?

Now, apologize to Simone.

Okay, Simone, I am sorry.

I'm sorry that you're not quite as smart as M -E -E. If you spell, she don't

know what you're saying.

That's okay, Mr. Brown. It's going to be a really exciting day today.

What's so special about today?

Simone, have you eaten breakfast?

No, I guess I forgot.

Oh, well, let me fix you some oatmeal.

Picking up oatmeal?

I'm pregnant.

What?

Well, I guess we didn't see that coming.

What do you mean you're pregnant?

I mean, I'm going to have a baby.

Come on.

Now, how could this happen?

Oh, Carmen, now, you ain't that saved now.

You couldn't think of a better question than that?

Mr. Burke, ain't nobody going to answer the door.

Carmen, don't ask no more dumb questions. Ain't nobody asking no dumb

You know what she did.

Oh,

Simone. Okay, girls, come on. Let's get ready for school.

Oh, Lord, look what the cat just spit up, a big ball of hair.

Good morning, Brown.

Now, you ain't finna sit up there and talk to me crazy in my house like I'm...

What you say?

Good morning, Brown.

Aren't you gonna invite me in?

Not until you go find my evil sister Vera.

I turned over a new leaf.

Well, was it some vodka on it?

No, but I am a little thirsty. Can you get me a glass of water, please?

Ah!

I know you're not Vera, because Vera ain't had a glass of water since they

plumping it up out the well.

You're not Vera. Get up. Where is everybody from?

Oh, we went for a run, and Sasha had worked, and Cora talked to Brianna's

about being pregnant.

Cora's pregnant?

No, not unless it's another immaculate reception.

Hey, Mom, what you doing here? Good morning, son. Hey, I'm a little sweaty.

Oh, well, you know it. I didn't know you were that bad.

Well, sorry.

Well, what you doing here? Everything okay?

Everything's fine.

Can't I just come and visit my family? Now, are we still recovering from your

last one -day pass from hell?

You sure everything's okay? Why are you just like that? You want to talk about

anything? No, I'm fine. Maybe I'm just going through the change.

I thought that only happened when it's a full moon.

Well,

Ma, how long you stay?

As long as the Lord allows.

When the Lord is ready for you to go.

That's the Lord.

Well, Ma, I got to go get changed for work, all right? I'll see you at dinner?

All right. Hey, hey, hey. We already did that dance.

All right.

You go clean up, baby. All right, now. All right, sorry. See you later. No,

nephew, don't leave me down here by myself for that. She one of them body

snatchers. You know, they always eat the good -looking ones first.

Vera, you're not going to eat me, are you? Don't eat me.

See, I know that ain't Vera, because Vera would have done said something.

Vera.

See, that ain't my sister, son.

That ain't my sister. Go now.

Food crate.

How can you eat at a time like this?

What? What time should I be eating?

Are you serious?

Simone, you're... Pregnant.

Who's the father?

Craig.

You slept with Craig?

Well, we aren't really sleeping, but... Ew!

TMI! Ew!

Listen, maybe, you know, you thought you were pregnant before. Maybe this is

just a false alarm.

No, I went to the clinic, and the test came back positive.

Aren't you going to congratulate me?

No! We're teenagers.

How can you be so calm?

What's the big deal?

Look at Ileana from Home Ec. Brittany in gym class.

second kid.

She's also on her second tour as a sophomore.

And if she's not careful, her kids are going to graduate before her.

I don't hear what you say.

I'm kind of excited to have a baby. A little girl where I can comb her hair,

dress her up, and take her for walks.

Simone, you're having a baby, not a cocker spaniel.

Hi, Brianna. Hi, Simone.

Hey.

Okay, um, Simone, are you all right?

Yeah. I'm a little hungry, but then again, I am eating for two now.

So how do your parents feel about this?

They act like it's not really happening.

Maybe because you haven't told them.

Could be.

See, I'm waiting until they're in a good mood. When my rabbits had babies, they

were really mad.

I'm pretty sure this is a bigger deal.

Simone, it's a huge deal.

This could keep you out of law school. Right, like that's the only thing.

How about finishing high school first? Thank you, Cora.

Look, come with me.

going? We're going to tell your parents. Well, can I finish my egg salad first?

Honey, trust me. Your eggs are finished for a while.

Come on. Come on, Reese.

You two sure did clean your plates.

Dinner was wonderful, Vera. Me and Mr. Brown cleaned the kitchen.

No, me and Mr. Brown ain't. You speak for yourself.

Well, that's the least we can do. Well, that's the least I'm gonna do. Let's

see.

And I hope you left room for dessert.

That was nice of her, Mr. Brown. Corbin, that ain't no nice of her.

You know what? I don't trust her. What do you mean? She got an angle, and I'm

going to find out what angle she coming from. Why do you think she has an angle?

Because, Corbin, she ain't said nothing smart to me all day since she been here.

And I don't like it. I don't like it. She going to say something smart to

Mr. Brown, maybe she realized she can catch more flies with honey than

You know, Corbin, you didn't know this, but Vera used to eat flies.

She used to sit in that backyard.

Right, and just picking them off like... We call a beer a fly trap.

Here you go.

All right.

Ooh, that looks lovely, baby. Mm -hmm.

Ooh, what kind of cake is that?

Lemon surprise.

Oh, lemon. Uh, what's the surprise?

I made it with bananas.

Bananas. All right, now.

I don't know where that comes from.

Mr. Brown, she's just trying to show you some... The only love my sister know

comes in a bottle.

Ah, Brown.

That was an old Vera.

Now I'm gentler, kinder, and soberer.

Well, I'm happy for you. But why the sudden change?

Oh, I just feel like I should tell the people I love how I feel about them.

Mm. Mm.

Yeah. Well, did you tell Johnny Walker? Because you know you love him the most.

Talking about you, you son of a... I think.

Well, Vera, maybe I did judge you wrong.

I accept your apology, Brown.

I do.

I'm gonna miss y 'all when I'm gone.

That makes one of us.

So where you going, Vera?

I'm dying.

You think it was the cake?

You swallowed half of it already.

Didn't you hear me tell you I'm dying, fool?

Yes. I'm dying, bro.

What time?

What you mean you dying?

Yeah, Vera.

I mean lights out.

Dirt nap.

Last call for alcohol.

Vera, is this something serious?

was too chicken to tell me himself.

I had to read my own chart, and there it was, clear as day.

Sarotha.

Sarotha? Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

You know, that's what Uncle Shorty died from.

Oh, no, Uncle Shorty? Oh, Lord, not Uncle Shorty. Uncle Shorty died. Nobody

you nothing. Nobody tell me nothing.

Who's Uncle Shorty?

Papa, you remember Uncle Shorty? He was real tall.

And he was just skinny. He was so little.

And he was light -complicated. About this color.

Hey, Vera, did you get a second opinion?

No, no, I didn't.

It's my liver.

I haven't been good to it.

Y 'all know I ain't been good to it.

Well, Vera, you can't take your liver to Happy Hour every day.

And look at Will.

Oh, no. No, no, no. And I don't want y 'all to tell him.

I'll tell him in my own way.

I'll tell him in my own way. That's what the preacher said to me.

In my own way.

In my own way.

That was weird.

I don't want to think about it.

Isn't my mom the best?

How can she think it's good that you're pregnant?

I held out six months longer than she did.

In your face, mom.

Hey, Simone, that's enough excitement.

Yay. Okay, let's have a seat. Okay.

Now, there are a lot of things that you need to do in order to prepare for this

baby. I know.

Like figure out what I'm going to wear to the birth.

I'm guessing not much.

And so you can get a regular doctor. I'm going to see if Will can get you some

prenatal vitamins.

Okay.

Will is going to be so excited.

Don't bet on it.

have an idea you should have a baby too that is an idea

it's just not a good one come on brianna we can have so much fun we can have

sleepovers and we can go on play dates i'm not having a kid i already have to

live with joaquin let's try something

I can't make any outfit like Keith. You really can't. It's really cute. Is it?

Brianna. Brianna.

Hey.

What were you doing?

Nothing. We were just talking about having babies at the same time.

You what?

Simone, you need to leave. But. Now.

The house.

Lavera, can I get you a nice cold glass of lemonade?

No, Brown.

Just the fact that you're here is enough for me.

Good, because I just finished off the last of this lemonade.

I can't believe you're serious.

Yes, we are serious.

Will, I want you to come sit down, baby. I'm sorry, Ma. Can I wait?

No, unfortunately not.

It's important.

So is this.

No, no. Now, nephew, this is a matter of life and death.

Well, I'll talk to Brianna, and you can meet us upstairs.

All right. Well, call me before you punish her.

What? I'm not the one who's pregnant.

Why am I in trouble?

Nasty by association.

Nasty.

Okay, so, uh, what is it, Ma? What's so important?

Everybody sit down. I wanted to bring my family together.

I've got some things to confess.

Okay, like what things?

Cora, you remember that summer you were playing in the backyard and your hair

suddenly caught on fire?

Remember that, baby? Yeah.

Well, Curtis Mitchell and I were up in a tree smoking a cigarette, you know.

Who knew that activator was so flammable?

I'm sorry about that, Cora.

And, Brown, you remember when you thought your rabbit ran away?

Yeah, yeah, I remember that day.

Well, and we had carrot stew for dinner.

Let's just say that Fluffy became part of the family that night.

You mean to tell me I ate Fluffy? We all ate Fluffy.

Now, I had seconds. Why does Fluffy taste like chicken?

Okay, well, why are you confessing all this?

Because, uh...

I'm dying.

Just like Fluffy. What do you mean you're dying?

Well, Dr.

Strickland said that I have cirrhosis.

Cirrhosis.

Cirrhosis. You sure?

Yes. Well, I read my own chart.

And there it was in black and white.

Cirrhosis.

Cirrhosis.

Why didn't he call me?

Well, the man's a coward.

And while I'm confessing, he's low on stamina, too.

Oh, Vera, stop being nasty.

All right, I'm going to call you.

Before you do, son, I think you deserve to know who your real father is.

I want to know this myself.

meet out here because my parents said i can't hang out with you anymore

why i didn't even do anything you got pregnant how was that my fault

really i guess i was kind of there now they

say that you're a bad influence wow

I never thought that getting pregnant would put me in the same category as

serial killers and the girls that smoke in the bathroom.

What are we going to do?

I don't know yet.

I guess we'll have to meet in secret.

No, I'll think of something to tell them.

Go ahead and tell her.

Brianna, didn't we tell you about that?

Yes, but... But nothing, Brianna.

Look, we understand that she's your friend, but we don't like the influence

she's having on you.

What influence?

my own mind i'm not gonna go get pregnant just because she did well you

shouldn't be thinking about having babies until you're married the time to

thinking about babies is when you're married and when is the time to abandon

friend just because she made a mistake i'm gonna stand by her that's right

i'm gonna stand over there look i know you guys

mean well but i won't turn my back on her when she needs me We understand,

Brianna. I guess we saw you with that pillow under your shirt, and we

overreacted.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to upset you.

Honey, look, Simone's going to have a lot of tough choices to make.

And this is not going to be easy. I know that.

You're good.

Sorry.

There's no reason for me to be there for her, right?

You're a good friend, Brianna.

I love you.

have happened if you had snuck out and came to that party with me in the first

place pregnant by osmosis all

right

that

was dr strickland he's gonna call right back i hope there's enough time well if

it's not can you give me that money back i loaned

It's going to burn up while she's gone.

That ain't me.

Okay, so you were going to tell me who my father is?

Oh, yeah.

That.

I know you've been dying to know who he is.

That's crazy. We are dying to know who his daddy is, and Vera is dying.

Mr. Brown, Vera, forgive him, for he knows not what he's talking about.

Okay, Mom, who is it? Who is it? Who's my father?

I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you this,

but your father is.

It's just Dr. Strickland. I got to take it. I'm sorry. One second.

Hello.

Uh -huh. Okay.

Okay. That don't sound good.

All right. I'll tell it. Thanks.

Give it to me straight, son.

How long do I have?

Apparently, somebody can't spell.

You don't have cirrhosis.

Cirrhosis?

You have psoriasis.

Psoriasis? Yes, and not the life -threatening kind.

You've been having me caring about you all this time. See, that's what I'm

talking about. You come in here live, ain't nothing even wrong with you.

She still has to tell me who my father is.

Get out of here!

No!

Get out!

Wait!

Why'd you do that?

Oh, honey, I ain't giving up that kind of information on a false alarm.

Now, somebody go and get my friend Johnny Walker Ray!

He gonna celebrate, and I mean celebrate!

Will's dad is, do you?

Yes, I do.

Is it anybody we know?

Okay, just give us a hint. Yes.

All right, all right.

He's tall, dark,

kind of handsome, rugged, rugged sort of way.

He has a mustache, and that's all I'm giving y 'all.

Now, y 'all figure it out.

Oh, figure it out? What you mean? You just described half of the men in

my dear.