Original subtitles

There's no place like home.

With your family around you, you're never alone.

When you know that you love, you don't need to roam. Cause there's no place

home.

Times are changing every day.

We won't get by with old flame away.

No, no. Pulling together, we'll make it right.

With help from our friends, I know we can try. Cause there's no place like

With your family around you, you're never alone.

When you know that you love, you don't need to roam. Cause there ain't no place

like home. There ain't no place like home.

I mean, no place, John.

Hi,

Mary. Hi.

Hi, Mary.

Hi.

Oh, this is so nice of you ladies to help Brenda with her Saturday night

Oh, think nothing of it. We were kids once, right?

It's been so long, I forgot.

Well, anyway, to show my appreciation, I got you each a little gift.

Oh, Mary.

You shouldn't have. What is it?

Earplugs. Shall Saturday night 227 will be rockin' and rollin'. Well, Mary, how

are you and Lester being able to put up with all that noise?

Oh, honey, we got us some deluxe earplugs with triple pads and we have a

seal for our bedroom door. All right.

Girl, I gotta hand it to you. You know, my parents never trust their furniture

with me and my friends.

Come to think about it, they still don't trust me with it.

Child, who's anything about trust? We're installing video cameras over each

piece of furniture.

What a good idea. If you take the party, then Brenda can show it to her

grandchildren.

You know what? If Brenda needs any more help with the party, tell her she can

call us.

Speak of the devil.

Here she comes.

Let's see if these things really work.

Hey, everybody.

These are my friends, Lisa and Karen.

Hi.

Say hi, everybody.

What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?

They're wearing earplugs, dear.

In case your Saturday night party hits the sonic party boom.

That's very good thinking on their part, Mrs. Jenkins.

We teenagers have a tendency to get noisy and inconsiderately disturb our

elders.

Well, the Martians have finally landed.

Why do we let her hang out with us?

You know, it looks like you girls bought out the store.

Yeah, well, we want to look really cool for the college guys when coming to the

party.

College guy?

Calvin and some of his friends.

I thought you were talking about real college guys.

Brenda, you are so lucky to have such a witty mother.

Well, aren't you sweet?

You said that about my mother.

I bet she did.

Brenda, so let me see the dress you bought for the party.

Oh, is that... No big deal. Just one of those things made out of cloth.

Oh, I'm so happy.

I thought you were going to say you bought a dress made out of linoleum.

There's that wit again.

Come on, friend.

Give your mom a little preview of your dress.

No, Lisa, she'll see it at the party.

I don't know why she thinks so shy, Mrs. J.

When she put it on at the store, everybody's head turned.

Really?

Well, come on, Brynn. Show it to Mother.

Well, okay.

See?

Eve wore more than this in the Garden of Eden.

I told her it was unsuitable, Mrs. J.

Oh, she looks great in it, Mrs. Jenkins. She'll be the hit of the party.

Um, honey, I think you should take it back. It costs too much, and it shows

much. Mom, I want to keep it.

Um, Lisa, Karen, um, Brenda and I want to have a little discussion.

Would you excuse us? We'll see you Saturday night.

Maybe your mother's right, Brenda. Now, I'm going in that direction, and I'd be

glad to take it back for you. Uh, look, Lisa, I think we'd better leave.

Bye, Brenda. Talk to you later. Bye.

Hi, Mr. Jenkins. Oh, hi, ladies.

Mm, Mr. Jenkins.

Interesting cologne. What's it called?

Uh, a hard day on the job.

Hi, Daddy.

Hi, sugar.

Hi, babe.

Hi, honey.

Daddy, I bought a dress with my allowance, and because Mom doesn't like

wants me to take it back.

Oh, come on, Mary. Now, fair is fair. If she bought a dress with her own money

and you don't like it, shouldn't mean she has to take it back.

Take it back.

No, no, no. Take that back now. Here, take that.

I guess I'll take this last lamb chop.

Why not?

You took the last roll, the last piece of corn, and the last grain of rice.

And that's probably the last time you'll fit in them pants.

Just think of it as more of me to love, darling.

I guess I better start on the dishes.

Oh, you never did tell me.

What happened when you took the dress back?

Nothing. I didn't return it.

I beg your pardon?

I thought you agreed that the dress went back.

No, you agreed. I like it, and I still want to keep it.

Whoa, hold it, hold it, hold it, motor mouth. You better put yourself in

reverse.

Daddy, it's time I stood up for my rights.

Mahatma Gandhi wouldn't have returned the dress.

He would if he had been my daughter.

Now, what does Gandhi have to do with this anyway?

He stood up for what he believed in. He was independent.

Independent? Oh.

Baby, let me tell you.

When you're ready to be independent, you will have an education which will allow

you to get a job, which will allow you to get your own apartment, which will

allow you not to have to listen to your tacky parents who take care of you.

Mom, what a typical parent thing to say.

Well, at least you remember who we are.

Now, the dress goes back, and that's it. But, Mom, I bought it to wear at the

party. Young lady, the only place you're going to wear that dress is under your

pajamas when you're fast asleep.

Mom, this really isn't fair.

Well, neither is life.

But those are the rules and we all have to live by them.

So, the dress goes back or the party's off?

Mom, I can't call off the party. I'll be the laughing stock of the school.

Don't be independent.

Make a decision.

The dress or the party?

The dress.

Good. No party.

See, Mary, that's why I wanted a boy.

I tell you, nothing can get under your skin like your own kid.

Greetings.

I lied.

Mary, you're looking especially radiant this evening.

Uh -oh, here it comes.

Oh, can't a landlord drop in on his favorite tenant without being accused of

having ulterior motives?

Okay, Julian, what do you want?

Well, since you brought the subject up, I do need a petite favor. I'm going to

New York tomorrow on a brief sojourn, and I need a responsible person to look

after my plants.

Well, I hope you find one. Goodbye.

All I need is a little water and a few kind words.

Julian, with you.

It's impossible to be kind.

Mr. Barlow, wait. How long did you say you'd be gone? Just till Sunday.

Sunday. Well, I'm not doing anything this weekend.

So I can water the plants for you if you want me to. If that's okay with you,

Mom. Just as long as you don't do it in that dress.

I haven't a clue what all this means, but I take that as a yes. So thank you.

Thank you.

And thank you, Miss Smart Butt.

And don't forget to mist the antherium in the bedroom. It makes them think

they're still in the rainforest.

What about plant food?

Oh, no, no, no. You never feed tropical plants in the winter. It spoils them

rotten.

Daisy? This is Brenda.

Brenda, say hello to Daisy.

I don't think so.

Come on, now. You're going to hurt her feelings.

Hello, Daisy.

What's up?

Brenda's going to take care of you while I'm away.

She's a friend. You can trust her.

Really talk to your plants?

All the time.

And they're a lot better than wives, I tell you.

These little babies just require a little sunlight and water.

And when their relationship is over, they have the decency to shrivel up and

die.

Look at the tide.

Oh, God, I'm going to miss my train.

Uh, Mr. Barlow, aren't you forgetting something?

Oh, how rude.

Bye, kids.

No, your tea.

Oh, yes, of course.

Well, goodbye. I'll see you on Sunday. All right. And thank you again.

Bye.

Hey, P is for party.

All right.

All is for party.

Hello? Karen?

There's been a slight change of plans. The party's no longer in my apartment.

Yeah, it's at the landlord's penthouse.

So spread the word and keep it a secret, okay?

No, from my parents.

And don't you say anything either.

Honey. Hmm?

Brenda really wanted to have that party tonight.

You think we were too hard on her?

Well, she wasn't tired of buying a dress with her own money.

However, the dress was smaller than a band -aid.

On the other hand, she did defy you.

But she is growing up.

But a parent ought to be able to discipline their child without feeling

Is that a yes, a no, we were, or we weren't?

We? You're the one who ruined her life.

Come on, babe, everything will be all right. She'll get over it.

I'm going to Karen's house to study biology.

Do I have your permission?

Oh, honey.

Look, I know you're upset with me, but all you had to do was take the dress

back, and you could have the party.

Mom, we've already been through this. You think one way, and I think another.

And if it makes you happy that you've ruined my life, fine.

See? She's gotten over it already.

What a terrific apartment.

Those college guys will have a great time chasing me around this place.

Do you think you could give me a little help with the food?

Oh, sure.

Good choice.

That's the one that fell on the floor.

Listen to her. Brenda, the dress looks gorgeous on you. Thank you.

Calvin!

Brenda, what a great dress.

You look fantastic in it. Is that Calvin?

Morgan, Satan really agrees with you. You look so mature.

Yeah, I'll save it twice a week now.

Guys,

this is Brenda, Karen.

And Lisa, this is Frank and Louie. Hi.

It's part of you.

Sam, Joe was nice with Mr. Barlow to let you use the penthouse.

He doesn't know how nice he really is.

By the way, did I tell y 'all fine you're looking at me?

Yeah, I think so twice, but don't let that stop you.

Calvin, I'm just dying to hear about college life.

Oh, really?

for Brenda's party. Who are you?

Brenda, who are you?

We're friends with Lisa. We are here to make this party happen.

I'm glad you could make it. You don't mind, do you, Brenda?

Well, actually, I wasn't expecting this many people. Come on in, everybody. Hey,

who's in charge of...

It's too loud.

What?

Hey, I can't hear any music.

Rock and roll has made me deaf.

I was clowning. I just turned down the music. It was up too loud.

So what is this, a party?

There's no problem.

Oh,

the plant's not driving.

Hey, I told you no smoking.

Okay, okay. Take it easy. Lighten up already.

No, not in the plant. That's expensive. It costs a lot of money.

Oh, please. No more people.

Please.

going on here i thought julian left town uh he did i'm just apartment sitting

well this is just a suggestion but maybe you should get some of these people out

of the apartment before they wreck the place

Today. Okay?

Get it? Got it? Good. Now get out. Oh, chill. Get out, Mr. McMillan. We're not

in class now.

That's right, Lisa. If we were, you'd be asleep.

Hey, just because you fuddy -duddies think fun is a dirty word, why do you

to ruin our good time, huh?

Fuddy -duddy? Yeah.

I will have you to know that this fuddy has more duddy in his little finger than

you have in your...

Your dancing shoes on, Travis.

Dance challenge.

All right, all right, all right, all right, all right. You're wrong. Let's

No, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold on, Baryshnikov head.

Don't you think that the only dance that should be done is everyone out the

doorway? He called me a buddy -duddy.

Where do you come from? Those are dancing words.

Where do you come from? West Side Story?

Let's just move everyone out of here.

Just let me dust Calvin off on the dance floor and we'll be out of here.

Go for what you know, Calvin.

I'm telling you, Mary.

Mary, in a world where the Berlin Wall is coming down, the Russians are trying

to make friends, and some of the beaches in South Africa are finally being

integrated, why or why can't the Redskins make it to the playoffs?

Simple. They're lousy.

Where's all that music coming from?

It's probably Travis and Dylan.

Is there a 911 number for noise busters?

I thought you said Brenda's party was canceled.

It was.

As a matter of fact, I almost canceled Brenda.

Well, you know what? So many kids came into this building, we could have opened

up a high school.

What are you talking about? Well, there's something going on up there in

penthouse. I mean, the music is so loud, Beethoven could hear it.

It's impossible.

Do you hear this?

Hey, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

fractal

ain't need to do.

First cover yourself up.

Mary, Lester, I'm glad you guys are here. Well, looks like our job is done.

Let's go, Kimisabe. Just a minute.

I can't believe you guys. Don't you have any sense of responsibility?

Are you kidding, Mary? I tried to stop him, honest.

Is that why Travis was dancing harder than anybody else?

I wasn't dancing. I was infiltrating.

Dad, Dylan's telling the truth. Ruth, if they hadn't have come up here, the kids

would have torn up the place.

You mean it could have been worse than this?

Lady, you have dug a hole for yourself so deep that you'll have to learn

to climb out.

Well, we don't do punishment. We'll see you later.

Goodbye.

Mom, Dad, I know you guys are upset with me. I know I disobeyed, but when are

you guys going to allow me to start making my own decisions?

You did that tonight. What kind of thought decision was it to mess up this

penthouse?

What has happened to my penthouse?

Mr. Barlow, you're home early.

I had a few friends over.

People did this?

know is how could you dare give her permission to have a party in your

penthouse? Au contraire, Mary Fair.

I only expected her to water my plants.

And just let, oh, my hyacinth has never looked so low.

You mean you did this on your own?

Oh, right down to the cheese whiz in my carpet.

Oh, no.

What's happening, Daisy?

From the looks of it, Daisy went crazy.

Brenda, you lied to Julian and to us. You're going to be married with a house

full of children and still be grounded.

I know, Dad. I'm sorry. I don't blame you. Mr. Barlow, I promise I'll make it

to you. You certainly will, and with your own money.

Uh, she has her own money?

Well, so far I can see at least $5 ,000 worth of damage here.

Don't push it, Julian.

Mr. Barlow, I'll use the rest of my savings. I'll take it.

All I have left is $50. I'll take it.

And even more than that, you're going to pay for everything. I don't care how

long it takes. And I hope you love your room, because I'm going to strip it so

bare you'll think it's Alcatraz.

I'll start cleaning up now.

Not in that dress.

That's right. You get your stuff and let's get out of here. Then you go down

there and change and get right back up here and start cleaning up.

and we had to go in there just to hear ourselves sing.

Now, you know it is time for you to be read.

First of all, you perpetrated a fraud with our friendship.

Second of all, you fronted me in front of my mother. And then you had the nerve

to try to get with Calvin. And when you realized you weren't living that large,

you went for another guy, only to be busted in the closet in front of my

parents. Now what do you have to say for yourself, Mona Lisa?

What do you think about that?

Well, she got your mouth.