Original subtitles

You finished unpacking? I'm all finished.

You know, it feels great to be back home. Not that I didn't have fun

Uncle Julius and Aunt Faye's farm.

Yeah, it was sort of fun, wasn't it? All those cows and pigs and 5 ,000

chickens.

I wish Dad would have come with us. He would have loved helping me slap the

pigs. You mean slop the pigs, dear.

No wonder they got so mad.

Oh, boy, am I glad you're back.

Well, does that go for me, too?

Oh, hi, Mrs. Jenkins.

We got to get down to the church right away.

Brenda, is there something you forgot to tell me?

Mom. No, Mrs. Jenkins, our band has to rehearse. We got a gig Saturday.

Oh, that's good, Calvin.

Okay, you can go, but I'm going to save some dust for you.

Thanks, Mom.

Well, I sure wasn't talking to the vacuum cleaner.

Look, I'm Thurman Fox.

I'm sub -leasing the apartment next door. How about sneaking away from this

and cleaning my place?

What? I'll give you $3 an hour. And if you move your tail, you can be back here

before they miss you.

I think you better move your tail before you get sucked up in this vacuum

cleaner.

Okay, Spunky.

Since you speak English, I'll give you $3 .50 an hour.

But keep your paws out of my refrigerator.

Look, what? Why don't you go find Snow White and your six other little friends?

Save some of that energy for the windows.

Look, I don't do housework.

I can see that.

But I'm willing to give you a shot. You do know what to do with a broom, don't

you? Well, I know that you do since you flew in here on one.

Now fly back out of here. All right, I'm going. But remember, when you want to

work, I'm right next door.

And remember, I pay minimum wage.

You know, it's really nice having a family meal again. We miss you too,

I got big news. I was going to wait till after dinner, but it's too good.

What is it, dear?

Well, I got a call from Chicago.

Rockmore Construction, one of the top companies in the Midwest, might want to

acquire my company.

Is that good?

Is winning the lottery good? Mary, you know what this could do for my company?

Well, honey, you always wanted to be your own boss. That's why you started

company in the first place.

Yeah, I know, but this will give me a chance to play in the big time.

Congratulations,

Daddy.

Well, I don't have it yet. Mine is one of three companies in Washington being

considered, but with a little luck.

Well, if that's what you want, dear, I'm all for it. And I think I have the

inside track.

Rockmore's planning one of their lawyers out to examine the companies, and you

know what smart old Lester did?

What did smart old Lester do?

Well, when the lawyer called and said all the hotels were booked, I tucked

in the sublease in the apartment next door.

Yeah, pretty smart, huh?

Lester Jenkins wasn't born yesterday. Now, Mary, when we meet him, I want you

be extra nice to him. I'm depending on you.

I bet that's him.

Oh, you must be Lester. Hey. Hi, I'm Thurman Fox.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Fox. Good to see you. Thank you.

Just call me Thurman.

This is my daughter, Brenda. How you do?

Hi. And, uh... That's my wife with her head under the table. Mary.

Hi.

You. You're Mrs. Jenkins?

Would you think I was the maid?

You two know each other?

I saw Mr.

Fox earlier today. He wanted some information.

And she told me where to go.

That's my wife. Always helpful and friendly.

Well, I see you're having dinner. I don't want to interrupt anything.

How far walk is it to the nearest diner?

Doesn't have to be nothing fancy. I mean, I can even eat alone at a counter.

Well, why don't you just stay and join us? Oh, I wouldn't dream of it. Well, if

you insist.

Always room for one more, huh, babe?

Mmm.

Fish.

Think you can throw a steak on the grill?

How about a big turkey?

Wonderful meal, Mary.

I didn't even mind waiting for the steak.

Well, it would have been faster, but the supermarket was three blocks away.

Well,

it's a shame you forgot the french fries.

If I pick up something sharp, grab my arm.

You know, Thurman, it's really great having you here. I want you to know you

eat here every night if you want.

I'm sorry it slipped.

What can you do, huh? You can't fire them.

I love being in Washington this time of year.

Lots of important people around.

Oh, yeah, Jesse Jackson's here, Thurgood Marshall. No, no, I mean the Pointer

Sisters.

They're over at the Civic Center.

You know anybody that can get tickets?

No, I don't think so.

Oh, that's too bad.

Now when you want tickets, you've got to wait in line for hours.

That sure would have made my trip.

Maybe Mary can pick us up some tickets.

Oh, really?

You know, Mary, I like to sit right on your eye.

Let me give you a little hint. If you tell them you got a hearing problem,

they'll get us all up close.

Cigar lister?

Uh, no thanks. Mary doesn't like me to smoke in the apartment.

Oh, lucky I'm not you.

Let me warm your coffee. Excuse me.

I'll get it.

Excuse me.

Oh, yeah, from Chicago.

Oh, this is Sandra Clark, your neighbor from upstairs.

I'm Thurman Fox, big construction man.

Oh, I knew it the minute I saw you. How do you do?

Sandra, I'd love to ask you to stay, but... Oh, thank you, Mary.

Why waste my breath?

I've been reading all about your company in the Fortune 300.

Oh, Sandra, that's the Fortune 500.

Oh, I don't bother with the bottom 200.

the way this woman thinks.

Well, you do represent a very impressive company, Thurman. Oh, yeah. First class

all the way. Lemos, expense accounts, fancy restaurants.

When I'm on the road, money's no object.

Excuse me.

Why did you decide to eat here?

Yeah, you could have eaten at the Four Seasons. Well, when I make up my expense

report, that's who I eat.

I'm even including the French fries.

You mean an important man like you has to make out a... own expense report?

you see, my secretary's in Chicago.

You mean you don't have one here in Washington?

Oh, Mary, give me a pad and a pencil.

I'm gonna offer Mr. Fox my services.

My professional services.

As a secretary.

Sandra's not gonna need a secretary while he's here. Well, hold it, hold it,

Lester. This woman has some qualifications I might be able to use.

I gotta remind you.

When you work for Thurman Fox, you've got to be qualified.

Oh, I'm very qualified.

Marion Lester will vouch for me, right?

Well, I can take a test.

I've got to type right upstairs.

Oh, well, I can use a tip -top secretary.

Come on, let me see how fast you are.

Oh, she's fast.

Oh, nice apartment.

Thanks.

Uh, Mr. Fox.

It would really mean a lot to me to work for Rockmore Construction.

I'd do anything to get the job.

Anything? Mm -hmm.

Dictation, typing. Oh, for a minute there, I thought you were going to get

job without taking a test.

Just joking, just joking. Come on, let me see how you type.

I'll dictate.

Dear Mr. Rockmore.

I said, dear. Mr. Rockmore.

I got it.

What do you mean you got it?

My type is shorthand.

Let me see what you can do in longhand.

Sheep.

Dear Mr. Rockmore, I hired a secretary today and she's not going to cost us a

lot. Read that back to me.

Dear Mr. Rockmore, I hired a secretary today and she's going to cost us a

bundle.

Dear Mr.

Rockmore.

rockmore hi alvin

the imperial club saturday day that sounds wonderful

afterwards oh alvin you devil you i'll see you saturday

okay dear mr rockmore

You can't go out with Ron on Friday. You're going out with Bill.

I thought I was going out with Bill on Saturday. No, no. You're going out with

Alvin on Saturday. Bill on Friday.

See if you can switch those tickets till Sunday.

Good idea.

Hello? Ron?

I just remembered Friday I'm doing some volunteer work at the hospital.

Can we make it Sunday?

Oh, you'll try? Oh, good.

Let me know, okay? Bye -bye.

Mr. Fox, I'm sorry. No more interruptions. No more calls. Okay.

Dear Mr. Rockmore, this is the... This is the...

Hello, Sandra Clark's resident.

She's busy right now. Can I take a message?

Well, George, Friday and Saturdays are out.

Maybe I can put you on a waiting list for Sunday.

Okay?

Yeah, we'll let you know on Saturday.

Uh -huh.

She'll be looking forward to it.

Goodbye. Mr.

Fox, I am sorry about all these interruptions. This isn't going so good.

Are you kidding?

Anybody that can juggle people around the way you do is the secretary for me.

You got the job.

Oh, that's wonderful.

Oh, by the way, Mr. Fox, I need Friday, Saturday night and Sunday all.

Oh, Barry, tell me, how is Lester coming with Mr. Fox?

Well, he's chalking up the company every chance he gets. Talk is cheap, honey.

Sandra told me that the other companies are Wining and Dining Fox.

Oh, Pearl, Mary's got that beat.

Girl, taking him to see those porno sisters is a lot better than those

dinners.

How much did the tickets cost, Mary?

Uh, you did get the tickets, didn't you, Mary?

Mary!

started to get the sniffles. I stood out there an hour and a half, Rose.

Oh, you didn't get those tickets, did you?

I could have gotten pneumonia.

Oh, girl, you in big trouble. Now, what did Lester say?

I haven't told him yet.

But Lester's very understanding.

Here comes Mr. Understanding now.

Guess I'm gonna clean my chillings.

Rose, I'm going to board up my window.

I spoke to Thurman this morning. All he could talk about was the concert.

Me, I got him eating out of the palm of my hand.

FTC's appointed sisters were as good as in.

Did you get a seat on the aisle?

Huh?

You didn't get a seat on the aisle.

Um, honey, why don't you go upstairs and freshen up? I'm going to take a little

walk. A walk to where?

California.

Now, you see, Lester, you don't have a thing to worry about.

You can always count on Mary.

I hope so.

Excuse me. Uh -huh.

Hey. Oh.

What's going on, Lester? I told you, a big surprise.

Oh, I hope it's more than these cheese balls.

Look, now, I know you was hoping to see the Pointer Sisters.

You got the tickets?

No, I didn't. But I did something just as good right here in my own living

Lester, you didn't. You couldn't have.

I've got some reports to look over before I make my recommendations.

Lester, you say you had some transactions from your last quarter?

Oh, yeah, I'll get them for you.

All right.

You know, Fox, I'm surprised.

You're a lot of fun at a party.

You're not so bad yourself.

Thank you.

But can I give you a little advice?

Advice? Let me tell you something. A lot of people in the company would tell you

to smile and keep your trap shut.

Everybody's not like me.

Oh, I don't know. I'm sure Dr.

Frankenstein could make another you.

See you now.

That's another thing that needs work. Your sense of humor.

Wives should be seen and not heard.

Why, you, in a minute, you're not going to be seen all day.

You should not control yourself, Mary. You're messing up a good evening. It's

bad enough the meatballs are cold. Ow!

You're putting Lester's future in danger. Your life is in danger.

Don't expect a thank you note for this.

Here are the papers.

Where's Starman?

He had to leave suddenly.

Oh, well, he can read these later.

Listen, baby.

We got it in the bag. Just think, I'm going to be part of a multinational

corporation, and I owe it all to you.

Thanks, baby.

Thurman, we seem to keep getting off on the wrong foot.

Now, I'd like to correct that.

Sit down.

Mm -hmm.

Well, I got to tell you, so far you've been working for the competition.

I know.

That's why I want to smooth things out between us. Oh, did Lester put you up to

this? No!

This is between you and me, and I don't want Lester to know anything about it.

Now, I know we've had our differences, but if there's any little thing I can do

to make it up to you, I mean anything.

Now I get the picture.

Happens all the time.

Big businessman, attractive, powerful.

Client's wife tries to sew up a deal by offering her a body.

as Godzilla.

I wouldn't enter you in a dog show.

Don't try to get out of it. You're all the same.

But it won't work.

Out.

Out. If you're not out of here in two seconds, I'm going to offer you a cup of

coffee.

Hi, dear.

Hey, man.

What do you say, thumb?

Would you excuse us a minute? Mary, can I speak to you in the kitchen?

Sure, dear.

Can I use your phone?

Well, why not? My house is your house.

Me cusser, Sue cusser.

Mary, you were right.

About what?

Well, I was in the office this morning thinking about this whole deal.

Then I started looking at that picture you gave me.

The one of me in the bathing suit?

No, the one of me in the hard hat.

You know, where my company was breaking ground on my first job.

And I was very proud of you on that day, dear.

And I wanted to stay that way.

I mean, it's been six years, and my company is still growing. I like the

that work for me, and I like my independence.

And I don't want anybody standing over my shoulder and telling me what to do.

I think you're doing the right thing.

Why would I need anybody else when I got you?

Yes, sir. I've signed up the situation here, and my recommendation is as

follows.

Penguin Construction first, J &C second, and the Jenkins Company third.

What's that?

You like Jenkins?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Oh, you know what happened? I had my paper upside down.

Don't you worry, sir. I'll get you that company. Cheat.

I won't screw up this time.

What? My job's in jeopardy.

Oh, Mr. Rockmore, hello, hello.

Oh, my goodness.

That's the old buddy.

Mary, my other old buddy.

Sit down, my old buddy.

You know something?

You two are really a lovely couple. I love you two.

Hide the cheese. That smell of rat.

And I really like you, Mary.

Forget the cheese. Set the big trap.

I love her sense of humor.

That's why I'm going to do everything I can for you. Well, that's what I want to

talk to you about. No, no, no. Don't thank me.

I'm a pretty good judge of character.

And I'm willing to go out on the limb for your company.

Yeah, but I... Let him finish, dear. I've been using my considerable

to persuade Mr. Rockmore to select you.

But I gotta tell you, your chances are very slim.

Good, because I've decided not to sell.

Hold it! I said slim!

These days, slim is good.

Uh, look, Thurman, Lester has always owned his own company, and we want to

it that way.

You can't do this to me! That's all I've done for you! But that's our decision.

Well, I guess it's the end of a fabulous career.

Wonderful expense account.

I'm through.

Oh, come on, Thurman. Now, why would they fire you?

Don't ask, dear. It could take weeks.

You're doing the right thing, Lester.

They take over your company, drain every bit of work out of you, then they cash

you out in the street like an old tire, just like they're going to do to me.

Oh, Thurman, come on. You're an attorney. You can get another job. Sure.

Well, actually, before I joined this company, I had my own practice.

Had me a little office on DeKalb Street.

Helped a lot of people, too.

Some paid, most didn't.

I didn't make a lot of money, but at least I felt good about myself when I

home at night.

Well, then go back to that. You'll be a lot happier.

Are you kidding?

And give up my expense account?

Shoot.

I'm going back to Chicago and beg for my job.

Well, to each his own, Thurman. Thank you, Lester, Mary.

Hope I wasn't too much trouble.

But as always, this is it.

The end.

The final curtain.

But I did it my way.

You know, down deep, I think he's an all right guy.

Yeah, way down deep.

Hi, Leslie. Hey, Rose. Hi, Mary.

Oh, hi, Rose.

I'm sorry to tell you this, but Mr. Fox is leaving.

I know. He's packing.

Oh, Lester, this is for you.

Hmm. What is it? Oh, Bill, Thurman said you were paying for the apartment.

What?