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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:50,727 --> 00:01:53,252 The colossal Kevin O'Shea goes back to pass. 2 00:01:53,429 --> 00:01:55,727 Sees his little brother Danny downfield. 3 00:01:55,899 --> 00:01:59,733 The rush is on. The ball is in the air. The crowd is going wild. 4 00:01:59,903 --> 00:02:03,896 Danny catches the ball. He's at the 10, the 20, the 25. 5 00:02:04,073 --> 00:02:06,268 It looks like he could go all the way. 6 00:02:06,442 --> 00:02:09,434 The O'Shea brothers are about to win the championship. 7 00:02:09,612 --> 00:02:13,810 Oh, there's a fumble. Danny got it. Hey, Kevin, wait up. 8 00:02:13,983 --> 00:02:18,647 How many touchdowns you gonna throw me? I'll bet it's at least 50, maybe 100. 9 00:02:18,822 --> 00:02:22,223 - What time was Mom gonna pick you up? - She's not picking me up. 10 00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:25,759 She said I could spend the day with you. Isn't that great? 11 00:02:25,929 --> 00:02:27,954 Yeah. Great. 12 00:02:37,974 --> 00:02:39,908 - Okay, spaces or laces? - Spaces! 13 00:02:40,076 --> 00:02:43,273 - Come on! - Go! 14 00:02:43,847 --> 00:02:45,280 - Come on! - Spaces! 15 00:02:48,351 --> 00:02:50,819 - Laces. - Laces, daddy-o. 16 00:02:52,155 --> 00:02:55,750 - I'll take Butz. - Yes. It's over. 17 00:02:56,492 --> 00:02:58,153 - Stein and Rip. - Yes. 18 00:02:58,328 --> 00:03:00,353 - Pinski. - Yes. 19 00:03:00,530 --> 00:03:01,997 - McCormick. - Yeah. 20 00:03:02,165 --> 00:03:03,757 - Ralphy. - Yes. 21 00:03:03,933 --> 00:03:05,901 - Mouse. - Yes. 22 00:03:06,069 --> 00:03:08,162 - Moritti. - Yeah. 23 00:03:08,338 --> 00:03:10,829 All right. Let's play some football. 24 00:03:11,140 --> 00:03:13,267 Hey, Danny, the ball. Give me. 25 00:03:14,143 --> 00:03:17,476 I must be pretty bad if my own brother won't even pick me. 26 00:03:17,647 --> 00:03:20,946 - Danny, look at it my way. - I stink and you know it. 27 00:03:21,117 --> 00:03:24,143 You're perfect, and I stink. That's it. The end. 28 00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:25,548 No, that's not it. 29 00:03:25,722 --> 00:03:28,816 It's just that I'm so good it makes you look really bad. 30 00:03:28,992 --> 00:03:31,358 - Are you trying to cheer me up? - Yeah. 31 00:03:31,961 --> 00:03:34,725 - It's not working. - See, I stink at something too. 32 00:03:34,898 --> 00:03:38,390 Give me the ball. I'll score a couple touchdowns for you. 33 00:03:40,937 --> 00:03:43,565 We kick off. Stand back, baby. 34 00:03:46,342 --> 00:03:48,139 Hi, Danny. 35 00:03:49,212 --> 00:03:50,440 Hi, Patty. 36 00:03:50,613 --> 00:03:54,811 - Aren't you playing today? - No, I'm on the injured list. 37 00:03:57,720 --> 00:03:59,517 Hey, Danny... 38 00:04:00,223 --> 00:04:01,520 ...see that water tower? 39 00:04:01,791 --> 00:04:04,919 One day our name's gonna be up there in big letters. 40 00:04:05,094 --> 00:04:06,527 The O'Shea brothers. 41 00:04:06,696 --> 00:04:09,927 We're gonna own this town. You and me, buddy. 42 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:35,954 Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Come on, people. Show me something. 43 00:04:36,125 --> 00:04:37,956 Move it! Move it! 44 00:04:38,127 --> 00:04:42,063 Are you kidding, people? It's called sweat. Show me some. Move. Move. 45 00:04:43,466 --> 00:04:46,196 Come on, gentlemen. Suck it up. Suck it up! 46 00:04:46,369 --> 00:04:48,303 - Faster. - Looking good, coach. 47 00:04:51,074 --> 00:04:53,338 - Oh, baby, now we're talking. - Yeah. 48 00:04:53,509 --> 00:04:58,037 All right. Everybody, back up. Back up. Give him room. Give him some air. 49 00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:00,910 Nice pop, Icebox. 50 00:05:01,951 --> 00:05:03,441 Thanks, Uncle Kev. 51 00:05:03,619 --> 00:05:05,484 - Is he dead? - Well, he ain't moving. 52 00:05:05,755 --> 00:05:10,522 - You killed him, Icebox. - Hey, Rudy, you okay? 53 00:05:12,395 --> 00:05:14,090 Oh, Rudy. 54 00:05:16,766 --> 00:05:20,395 Peanut butter and jelly sandwich? Are you nuts? 55 00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:22,629 It's still good. 56 00:05:22,805 --> 00:05:25,797 You'll never get anywhere treating your helmet like a lunch box. 57 00:05:25,975 --> 00:05:27,943 - What is that? - Cheetos. 58 00:05:28,111 --> 00:05:30,443 - Crunchy or puffed? - Puffed. 59 00:05:30,613 --> 00:05:31,602 Wimp. 60 00:05:31,781 --> 00:05:33,976 Everyone from here over, go with Coach Butz. 61 00:05:34,450 --> 00:05:36,680 Everyone from here over, come with me. 62 00:05:36,953 --> 00:05:39,615 - Come on! - Let's find out who's gonna make this team. 63 00:05:39,789 --> 00:05:42,417 - My mom made that! - Move it. 64 00:05:42,592 --> 00:05:44,253 Set. Go. 65 00:05:47,630 --> 00:05:49,154 Set. Go. 66 00:05:53,269 --> 00:05:54,429 Go. 67 00:05:56,572 --> 00:05:59,336 - Oh, man. - Next time. 68 00:05:59,509 --> 00:06:04,003 - Fifth one he's booted. - Hands like frying pans. Set. Go. 69 00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:08,880 Why are you doing this to me, fellas? 70 00:06:09,052 --> 00:06:13,113 I cut your nails, wash you, put gloves on you when you're cold. 71 00:06:13,289 --> 00:06:16,452 Hey, Hanon, you ever catch anything? Ever? 72 00:06:16,626 --> 00:06:19,652 Caught a cold yesterday, Murph. Here, have some. 73 00:06:19,829 --> 00:06:23,128 Gross. Gross. Get off of me, you little dork. 74 00:06:23,599 --> 00:06:25,032 Speed: 75 00:06:25,368 --> 00:06:29,498 The distance gained divided by the time of travel. 76 00:06:29,672 --> 00:06:32,732 You clowns want to play football, you gotta move. 77 00:06:32,909 --> 00:06:34,376 Ready. 78 00:06:39,549 --> 00:06:42,382 Come on, Tad. Go, Tad. Come on. Dig. 79 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:47,712 What is this, a telethon? Ready. 80 00:06:58,868 --> 00:07:00,028 Next. 81 00:07:04,574 --> 00:07:07,702 Eight point five. Excellent, Briggs. 82 00:07:08,644 --> 00:07:11,545 - How did I do? - I don't know. I don't have a sundial. 83 00:07:11,714 --> 00:07:13,204 Back in line. 84 00:07:13,382 --> 00:07:15,873 Hey, Icebox... 85 00:07:16,052 --> 00:07:19,453 ...you look like a boy and play like a boy. 86 00:07:19,622 --> 00:07:20,987 Do you pee standing up? 87 00:07:21,157 --> 00:07:24,024 No, when she's hot to trot she's still gotta squat. 88 00:07:24,627 --> 00:07:29,360 - Get off. I can't breathe! - That's the whole point. 89 00:07:31,134 --> 00:07:33,466 - Becky, let him go. - I can't breathe. 90 00:07:33,636 --> 00:07:36,070 - Get away. Come on. Get off! - Let him go. 91 00:07:36,239 --> 00:07:38,434 - Let me go. - Please, stop. 92 00:07:39,742 --> 00:07:41,607 You're lucky my dad showed up. 93 00:07:45,948 --> 00:07:47,882 - Hi, Danny. - Hi. 94 00:07:48,050 --> 00:07:50,143 - Hey, guys. - Hi, Dan. 95 00:07:50,319 --> 00:07:54,415 Hey, guess what, Uncle Dan? I got the whole headlock thing on tape. 96 00:07:54,590 --> 00:07:57,718 - Here, wanna see? - No, that's okay. Thanks. 97 00:07:57,894 --> 00:08:00,954 - How's she doing? - She's the best one out there. 98 00:08:08,304 --> 00:08:10,033 You know... 99 00:08:11,374 --> 00:08:14,969 ...today I'm reminded of what a lucky guy I am. 100 00:08:16,479 --> 00:08:19,141 Lucky to have been born an O'Shea. 101 00:08:21,417 --> 00:08:23,977 Lucky to have been born in this great town. 102 00:08:24,153 --> 00:08:26,678 Lucky to have been blessed with abilities... 103 00:08:26,856 --> 00:08:30,986 ...that allowed me to bring something back here to Urbania... 104 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:32,525 ...my town. 105 00:08:32,695 --> 00:08:35,095 - Things like: - Three high school championships. 106 00:08:35,264 --> 00:08:38,495 - Three high school championships. - A collegiate championship. 107 00:08:38,668 --> 00:08:41,466 - A collegiate title. - An all-American title. 108 00:08:41,637 --> 00:08:46,370 - An all-American title. And not to mention... - And not to mention a Heisman Trophy. 109 00:08:46,809 --> 00:08:48,208 ...a Heisman Trophy. 110 00:08:54,650 --> 00:08:56,117 Today, I'm even more lucky... 111 00:08:56,285 --> 00:09:00,119 ...because there's one more thing I can bring back to this town: 112 00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:02,784 A Peewee State Championship. 113 00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:04,392 Yeah! 114 00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:14,292 All right. All right. 115 00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:19,800 Now, when you hear your name called... 116 00:09:19,976 --> 00:09:22,410 ...I want you to go over to Coach Butz... 117 00:09:22,578 --> 00:09:23,977 ...and pick up your jersey. 118 00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:28,080 - Those jerseys are so cool. - Dibs on Montana's number. 119 00:09:28,251 --> 00:09:31,220 I'm getting Michael Irvin's number, the big 8-8. 120 00:09:31,387 --> 00:09:33,355 I just want one of those shirts. 121 00:09:34,090 --> 00:09:36,684 - Briggs. - Yeah! 122 00:09:37,493 --> 00:09:39,461 - Patterson. - Yes! 123 00:09:39,629 --> 00:09:41,290 - Hoffs. - Yeah. 124 00:09:41,464 --> 00:09:44,228 - Lewis. - Yeah. 125 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:45,833 Bookman. 126 00:09:47,270 --> 00:09:49,932 - Grabelski. - Grabelski! 127 00:09:50,106 --> 00:09:52,540 - Rivera. - Rivera! 128 00:09:52,742 --> 00:09:56,303 - Scanlon. - Scanlon, my man. 129 00:09:56,479 --> 00:09:59,039 - Parkhurst. - Yes. 130 00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,614 - Walker. - Yeah. 131 00:10:03,786 --> 00:10:06,619 - Lindemann. - Yeah. 132 00:10:07,023 --> 00:10:08,752 - Beauregard. - Yeah. 133 00:10:08,924 --> 00:10:10,585 Gibbs. 134 00:10:11,961 --> 00:10:14,759 - Grieson. - Yes! 135 00:10:16,832 --> 00:10:18,459 And last but not least... 136 00:10:19,335 --> 00:10:22,031 ...the backbone of this team... 137 00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:26,804 ...Shawn Murphy. - Yes! I knew it, Becky! 138 00:10:26,976 --> 00:10:30,605 Yes, thank you! I knew it! 139 00:10:37,353 --> 00:10:38,786 Now... 140 00:10:39,121 --> 00:10:40,588 ...for the rest of you... 141 00:10:42,191 --> 00:10:44,216 ...l'd like to say... 142 00:10:44,593 --> 00:10:46,254 Well, I just... 143 00:10:46,429 --> 00:10:49,455 I'd like to thank you for trying out. 144 00:10:49,632 --> 00:10:54,626 And I want you to remember, hey, there's always next year. 145 00:10:57,340 --> 00:10:59,968 All right. Go. 146 00:11:14,390 --> 00:11:15,857 Okay. 147 00:11:17,660 --> 00:11:21,255 Well, I think this really sucks. 148 00:11:22,531 --> 00:11:25,762 I guess there's nothing we can learn from this. Is there? 149 00:11:25,935 --> 00:11:28,733 Never try out for anything again. 150 00:11:47,757 --> 00:11:49,657 - Take her easy, coach. - Hey, Ross. 151 00:11:49,959 --> 00:11:51,483 Kevin. 152 00:11:51,660 --> 00:11:55,528 - What the hell are you doing? - I'm putting together a championship team. 153 00:11:55,698 --> 00:11:57,632 Did you see the faces of the other kids? 154 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:01,099 Football isn't about faces. It's about speed, about talent. 155 00:12:01,270 --> 00:12:04,296 I picked the best. Besides, I only got three weeks. 156 00:12:04,473 --> 00:12:07,169 - I can't waste my time with... - Losers. 157 00:12:07,576 --> 00:12:10,409 - Butz. - Who the hell are you, Vince Lombardi? 158 00:12:10,880 --> 00:12:12,472 This is peewee football. 159 00:12:12,648 --> 00:12:16,345 - Every kid should have a chance to play. - Not on this team. 160 00:12:17,420 --> 00:12:20,014 What about Becky? She's better than those boys. 161 00:12:20,189 --> 00:12:22,885 I hate to break it to you, but Icebox is a girl. 162 00:12:23,058 --> 00:12:25,549 If you treat her like a girl, she'll act like one. 163 00:12:25,728 --> 00:12:30,062 - Don't tell me how to raise my daughter. - Don't tell me how to pick my squad. 164 00:12:30,599 --> 00:12:32,931 Way to go, Kevin. You hurt their feelings. 165 00:12:33,102 --> 00:12:35,536 - Danny... - You hurt their feelings. 166 00:12:35,704 --> 00:12:38,138 You and I both know those kids can't cut it. 167 00:12:38,307 --> 00:12:41,640 What am I supposed to do, lie to them? Build up their hopes? 168 00:12:41,811 --> 00:12:44,245 Trust me. It's better this way. 169 00:12:44,713 --> 00:12:47,341 You'll thank me tomorrow. 170 00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:51,615 I knew you'd see it my way. 171 00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:15,371 God bless family, friends... 172 00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:19,810 ...flowers, Nickelodeon, all the little kitties... 173 00:13:20,015 --> 00:13:25,476 ...PEZ, Mr. Lorenzo, the school janitor... His ears are so hairy. 174 00:13:25,654 --> 00:13:31,058 - He's an unfortunate man, Priscilla. - God bless Daddy's favorite sport, football. 175 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:32,216 - Amen. - Amen, baby. 176 00:13:32,394 --> 00:13:34,385 - Amen. - Dig in. 177 00:13:34,663 --> 00:13:37,723 I still don't understand why you didn't pick Becky. 178 00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,596 - Yes, you do, Karen. - It's not good enough, Kevin. 179 00:13:40,769 --> 00:13:44,728 She's your niece, and she's one of the best players out there. 180 00:13:44,907 --> 00:13:48,604 - Yeah, and she can make boys cry. - Honey, she's a girl. 181 00:13:48,777 --> 00:13:51,041 And girls can run countries... 182 00:13:51,213 --> 00:13:54,649 ...they can sit on the Supreme Court, they can discover radium... 183 00:13:55,050 --> 00:13:57,143 ...but they can't play peewee football. 184 00:13:57,319 --> 00:13:59,446 - Correct. - Oh, Kevin. 185 00:13:59,622 --> 00:14:03,456 All right. Maybe I went a little too far. Maybe I've been a little... 186 00:14:03,626 --> 00:14:07,494 - Pigheaded? Chauvinistic, maybe. - All right. You proved your point. 187 00:14:07,663 --> 00:14:10,257 I think Becky should be involved with the team. 188 00:14:10,599 --> 00:14:12,294 - Really? - Yeah, or any girl. 189 00:14:12,468 --> 00:14:15,437 Debbie, get your friends. I need girls with spirit. 190 00:14:15,604 --> 00:14:19,096 - I need pom-poms. I need cheerleaders! - Yes! 191 00:14:23,512 --> 00:14:26,310 I hate not being picked. 192 00:14:28,484 --> 00:14:29,815 Hey, I got an idea. 193 00:14:29,985 --> 00:14:32,852 Why don't we go put some mud tires on the go-cart? 194 00:14:33,022 --> 00:14:36,253 - I don't want to. - All right. Forget the tires. 195 00:14:36,425 --> 00:14:40,361 How about if we go camping in the woods, huh? Make moose sounds? 196 00:14:41,630 --> 00:14:43,655 Forget the moose sounds. 197 00:14:43,832 --> 00:14:45,800 Listen, Beck... 198 00:14:46,368 --> 00:14:50,896 ...remember when Mom said that she was gonna have to do what was best for her? 199 00:14:51,941 --> 00:14:56,469 Well, when she chose to leave us she was kind of making a choice for us too. 200 00:14:56,645 --> 00:15:01,173 I mean, in a way, it gave us a chance to get real close, you and me. Right? 201 00:15:02,585 --> 00:15:05,850 When Uncle Kevin didn't pick you it was the same thing... 202 00:15:06,021 --> 00:15:09,013 ...because, in a way, he freed you up for something else. 203 00:15:09,358 --> 00:15:12,691 Or to do something different where you could do the picking. 204 00:15:12,861 --> 00:15:14,351 Dad... 205 00:15:14,530 --> 00:15:16,430 ...I just wanna play football. 206 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:21,497 Hey, sweetie, if I had a football team, I'd pick you. 207 00:15:33,649 --> 00:15:36,413 We never get picked for anything. 208 00:15:36,685 --> 00:15:40,451 - Life stinks. - Yeah, there goes my shot at the pros. 209 00:15:40,623 --> 00:15:42,557 I'm gonna have to be a senator. 210 00:15:42,725 --> 00:15:46,092 Here's a kiss for Murphy and one for Patterson and Briggs. 211 00:15:55,237 --> 00:15:58,934 Zol-fart, what kind of road kill did your mom feed you last night? 212 00:15:59,108 --> 00:16:02,771 - Free-range skunk. - This is a private establishment, gentlemen. 213 00:16:03,345 --> 00:16:05,108 Yeah, scram. 214 00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:10,682 - Please? - I'm hurt. I'm really hurt. 215 00:16:10,853 --> 00:16:15,051 Yeah, we just came by to tell you guys how incredibly sorry we are... 216 00:16:15,224 --> 00:16:17,249 ...that you didn't make the team. 217 00:16:17,426 --> 00:16:18,825 Not! 218 00:16:26,268 --> 00:16:28,133 The Icebox! 219 00:16:30,906 --> 00:16:33,306 - Let's get out of here. - Go! 220 00:17:35,437 --> 00:17:37,632 Sure. Big shot on the go-cart. 221 00:17:38,273 --> 00:17:40,605 I'd give anything to get you on the field. 222 00:17:40,776 --> 00:17:44,143 - Don't worry, Murph. You'll get your chance. - Yeah, sure. 223 00:17:44,313 --> 00:17:47,077 You and your spaz patrol didn't make the team. 224 00:17:47,249 --> 00:17:49,581 Well, I got a little news flash for you. 225 00:17:49,752 --> 00:17:54,212 We started our own team, and we're gonna kick your Cowboy butts. 226 00:17:54,389 --> 00:17:57,085 If you got a team, who's your coach? 227 00:17:57,259 --> 00:17:59,022 My dad. 228 00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:01,856 Your dad? 229 00:18:13,075 --> 00:18:16,340 There are few times in a man's life when he can howl at the moon. 230 00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:20,175 When he gets married, when he scores the winning touchdown in a game... 231 00:18:20,415 --> 00:18:23,145 ...and when he buys his first Chevy. Congratulations. 232 00:18:23,318 --> 00:18:25,878 - Thanks, Mr. O'Shea. - Butz. 233 00:18:29,458 --> 00:18:32,188 - I'm going to lunch. You wanna surprise me? - Yeah. 234 00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:35,592 - Sell a car. - Okay. Sure. 235 00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:58,649 We're down by six points. It's third and goal, two seconds left. 236 00:18:58,821 --> 00:19:01,153 I've been hit so many times I can't see. 237 00:19:01,323 --> 00:19:05,123 I'm busted up. I'm bleeding. I'm so bruised I look like a code blue. 238 00:19:05,294 --> 00:19:08,092 - Two seconds? Thought it was four. - Swore it was three. 239 00:19:08,263 --> 00:19:13,223 Believe me. It was two seconds. Now the crowd in the stadium is going nuts. 240 00:19:13,402 --> 00:19:16,633 - All eyes are on me. I know... - Howdy, gents. 241 00:19:17,306 --> 00:19:18,739 Already voted, mayor. 242 00:19:19,875 --> 00:19:24,141 O'Shea, I got my tail in a trap. We gotta talk. 243 00:19:24,313 --> 00:19:27,305 Excuse me, boys. A little peewee business. 244 00:19:28,116 --> 00:19:30,016 Four seconds. 245 00:19:30,185 --> 00:19:33,177 To hell with the time, you don't know what year it is. 246 00:19:33,355 --> 00:19:34,481 No. 247 00:19:34,656 --> 00:19:38,057 I'm feeling kind of foolish, son. 248 00:19:38,227 --> 00:19:39,524 Maybe it's the tie. 249 00:19:40,963 --> 00:19:44,797 Never mind the tie. Now, we got a turd in the punch bowl. 250 00:19:44,967 --> 00:19:46,059 What? 251 00:19:46,235 --> 00:19:49,636 I got Urbania in the Pop Warner league by telling everybody... 252 00:19:49,805 --> 00:19:52,638 ...that the great Kevin O'Shea was gonna be coaching. 253 00:19:52,808 --> 00:19:55,436 - Yeah? - I just got a phone call. 254 00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:58,444 It seems there's two teams in this town. 255 00:19:58,614 --> 00:20:00,241 Who's coaching the other one? 256 00:20:00,415 --> 00:20:02,781 Hey, fellas. Good morning, Louise. 257 00:20:02,951 --> 00:20:05,010 How you doing, champ? 258 00:20:09,258 --> 00:20:10,623 - Dad. - Hi. 259 00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:12,419 I gotta tell you something. 260 00:20:12,594 --> 00:20:16,462 Me and the guys, we're forming our own football team. Love you a lot. 261 00:20:16,632 --> 00:20:18,896 You trying to make me look like an idiot? 262 00:20:19,067 --> 00:20:21,865 Where do you come off trying to put together a team? 263 00:20:22,037 --> 00:20:26,064 I mean, what makes you think that you could coach football? 264 00:20:31,246 --> 00:20:33,942 - I just heard about this... - I don't want to hear it. 265 00:20:34,116 --> 00:20:38,212 No, Danny. You can't coach football. Hell, you couldn't even play. 266 00:20:38,387 --> 00:20:41,515 - Whose fault was that? - It wasn't my fault. 267 00:20:41,690 --> 00:20:44,716 Who said life was fair? Some of us run for touchdowns... 268 00:20:44,893 --> 00:20:46,656 ...some of us run the projector. 269 00:20:46,828 --> 00:20:50,559 - I ran the class projector. - I'm sure you were a great projectionist. 270 00:20:50,732 --> 00:20:53,633 Danny, listen, guys like you and kids like that... 271 00:20:53,802 --> 00:20:57,363 They can't help that they're no good, but they learn things. 272 00:20:57,539 --> 00:21:00,599 I mean they invent things. They win Nobel Prizes. 273 00:21:00,776 --> 00:21:05,372 Einstein. Could he catch? Did anybody care? No. 274 00:21:05,614 --> 00:21:07,844 Danny, listen to me. Listen to me. 275 00:21:08,016 --> 00:21:11,110 These things that you do with the kids, they're great. 276 00:21:11,286 --> 00:21:13,117 I think they're admirable. 277 00:21:13,288 --> 00:21:17,520 You want to start a chess club, a little nature walk class? This is fine. 278 00:21:19,628 --> 00:21:21,255 So let me get this straight. 279 00:21:21,430 --> 00:21:24,126 It's okay with you if I do something with the kids? 280 00:21:24,299 --> 00:21:25,732 Sure. 281 00:21:26,335 --> 00:21:28,895 - But not football. - Exactly. 282 00:21:29,504 --> 00:21:32,132 I knew you'd see it my way. 283 00:21:32,307 --> 00:21:33,774 - No, I don't. - Pardon me? 284 00:21:33,942 --> 00:21:35,466 I don't see it your way. 285 00:21:36,044 --> 00:21:39,878 I've really never seen it your way. I hate your way. 286 00:21:40,048 --> 00:21:42,608 - Now what's gotten into you? - I'll tell you. 287 00:21:42,784 --> 00:21:46,220 You've gotten into me, and I'm sick of it. 288 00:21:48,490 --> 00:21:52,358 - We're forming our own team. - League rules state: One town. One team. 289 00:21:52,527 --> 00:21:54,654 - You can't have two. - Have a playoff. 290 00:21:54,830 --> 00:21:58,994 That's a great idea, Wilbur. How about it, fellas? 291 00:21:59,167 --> 00:22:01,101 How about it? 292 00:22:01,269 --> 00:22:04,136 Two Saturdays from today, meet me at half-court. 293 00:22:04,306 --> 00:22:07,503 It's the 50-yard line, Dad. 294 00:22:10,012 --> 00:22:11,274 Danny... 295 00:22:12,447 --> 00:22:14,142 ...you don't stand a chance. 296 00:22:14,583 --> 00:22:16,983 We just want to play. 297 00:22:20,322 --> 00:22:22,347 Yeah! 298 00:22:29,164 --> 00:22:31,792 Where are we gonna find anybody for the team? 299 00:22:31,967 --> 00:22:34,561 Someone who's good, not at basketball, but like... 300 00:22:34,736 --> 00:22:36,795 Are you guys kidding me? 301 00:22:45,047 --> 00:22:46,878 Nothing but glass. 302 00:22:47,049 --> 00:22:48,516 You want to play football? 303 00:22:48,683 --> 00:22:51,777 Mr. O'Shea, I have an aversion to pain and suffering. 304 00:22:51,953 --> 00:22:54,751 Nubie, I'm not talking about setting foot on the field. 305 00:22:54,923 --> 00:22:59,724 I need somebody to help me coach, you know, to come up with some plays. 306 00:23:00,595 --> 00:23:02,062 What kind of plays? 307 00:23:03,765 --> 00:23:05,494 Creative plays. 308 00:23:05,801 --> 00:23:07,564 Anything goes? 309 00:23:09,805 --> 00:23:11,534 Use your imagination. 310 00:23:15,377 --> 00:23:16,366 I'm in. 311 00:23:21,550 --> 00:23:23,745 - You ever played football? - No. 312 00:23:23,919 --> 00:23:26,285 - Do you like football? - No. 313 00:23:26,455 --> 00:23:28,320 - You want to play football? - No. 314 00:23:28,490 --> 00:23:30,151 Great. You can be on our team. 315 00:23:37,332 --> 00:23:39,766 Yes, that's right, flight 45. 316 00:23:39,935 --> 00:23:42,904 - Dad. - I'll see you Tuesday, son. 317 00:23:43,071 --> 00:23:45,733 Yeah, the flight gets in at 9:00. Don't worry. 318 00:23:59,121 --> 00:24:00,816 What about him? 319 00:24:00,989 --> 00:24:02,513 Hey. 320 00:24:08,730 --> 00:24:11,699 Merry Christmas, everybody. 321 00:24:13,034 --> 00:24:15,002 Look at this. 322 00:24:15,203 --> 00:24:17,797 There's more stuff over here. Give me a hand. 323 00:24:20,408 --> 00:24:23,241 Careful with this. Some of these are antiques. 324 00:24:27,115 --> 00:24:30,278 Timmy, I'm not sure, but I don't think that goes there. 325 00:24:30,452 --> 00:24:33,649 Guys, a lot of this equipment has been used before. 326 00:24:38,727 --> 00:24:40,888 It's a mom! 327 00:24:45,767 --> 00:24:49,396 Excuse me, coach? Hi, Mr. O'Shea. I'm Cheryl Berman. 328 00:24:49,571 --> 00:24:52,870 I'm sorry Jake's late, but I took him to see Dr. Harding. 329 00:24:53,041 --> 00:24:56,135 He sneezed three times this morning and had me worried. 330 00:24:56,311 --> 00:24:57,801 You can't be too cautious. 331 00:24:57,979 --> 00:25:02,678 We never thought we'd have children, not after 13 years. It was me. 332 00:25:02,851 --> 00:25:05,649 When I got pregnant the doctor ordered me to bed. 333 00:25:05,820 --> 00:25:08,584 I spent nine miserable months on my back. 334 00:25:08,757 --> 00:25:12,921 If I'd rolled over, I could've lost him. And the birth, God only knows the pain. 335 00:25:13,094 --> 00:25:17,622 He weighed only 1 pound, 11 ounces. He spent six weeks in an incubator. 336 00:25:17,799 --> 00:25:21,030 And I think football is just the medicine for him. 337 00:25:23,905 --> 00:25:26,601 My shrink told her I gotta get out more. 338 00:25:28,210 --> 00:25:31,145 - I think he's gonna be fine. - Oh, okay. 339 00:25:42,991 --> 00:25:44,117 Cool. 340 00:25:45,827 --> 00:25:47,385 Thanks. I needed that. 341 00:25:49,998 --> 00:25:51,556 Let's kick some butt. 342 00:25:51,733 --> 00:25:55,430 - I don't know but I've been told - Butz's butt is green with mold 343 00:25:55,604 --> 00:25:59,665 - You say thank you, I say please - Kevin sits down when he pees 344 00:26:07,882 --> 00:26:10,373 Looking good. Real good. 345 00:26:11,686 --> 00:26:14,655 All right. Let's stretch it out. Come on. 346 00:27:03,004 --> 00:27:05,234 He throws. It's up. 347 00:27:07,909 --> 00:27:12,073 Yeah! Touchdown! 348 00:27:24,392 --> 00:27:27,555 - What a throw. - What a find. 349 00:27:27,729 --> 00:27:31,221 What a hunk. Wait a minute. 350 00:27:31,766 --> 00:27:33,631 What am I saying? 351 00:27:33,802 --> 00:27:35,736 I'm the Icebox. 352 00:27:35,904 --> 00:27:38,839 The Icebox doesn't like boys... 353 00:27:39,507 --> 00:27:41,338 ...except for that one. 354 00:27:45,647 --> 00:27:48,775 Hey, buddy, catch this. 355 00:27:49,584 --> 00:27:51,484 - He caught it. - Good catch. 356 00:27:51,886 --> 00:27:54,377 Nice arm. 357 00:27:55,156 --> 00:27:56,987 - Junior Floyd. - I'm Hanon. 358 00:27:57,158 --> 00:27:58,420 - Zolteck. - What's up? 359 00:27:58,593 --> 00:28:00,185 - I'm Tad. - Cool. 360 00:28:01,596 --> 00:28:05,930 - You wanna play some football? - Yeah, let's see that arm again. 361 00:28:11,973 --> 00:28:13,270 Where is he? 362 00:28:13,441 --> 00:28:15,272 Hey, you. 363 00:28:24,552 --> 00:28:25,985 Hi. 364 00:28:28,723 --> 00:28:32,750 Dad, don't tell jokes. You can't tell jokes. You never could tell jokes. 365 00:28:32,927 --> 00:28:35,623 I'm gonna ask his mother if he can play football. 366 00:28:35,797 --> 00:28:38,789 I can't go in there. I'd look like a geek. 367 00:28:38,967 --> 00:28:42,494 This doesn't sound like you. You got a crush on this guy? 368 00:28:42,670 --> 00:28:46,868 I'm the Icebox. I don't get crushes. 369 00:28:52,814 --> 00:28:54,475 Oh, my God. There he is. 370 00:28:54,649 --> 00:28:57,413 - He is so cute. - Relax. 371 00:29:00,789 --> 00:29:03,553 - You didn't tell me his mother's Patty Floyd. - So? 372 00:29:03,725 --> 00:29:06,125 I knew her when I was a kid. I had a thing... 373 00:29:06,294 --> 00:29:08,819 - Would you get a grip? - Me? You get a grip. 374 00:29:09,397 --> 00:29:12,161 - One of us has gotta knock on that door. - You. 375 00:29:12,333 --> 00:29:14,858 - We need a quarterback. Do it. - No, you do it. 376 00:29:18,873 --> 00:29:22,070 Hey. You traitor! 377 00:29:30,685 --> 00:29:32,880 Hi. Can I? 378 00:29:35,990 --> 00:29:38,117 - Danny? - Hi. 379 00:29:39,227 --> 00:29:43,027 - Danny O'Shea, how are you? - Fine. Really good. 380 00:29:43,198 --> 00:29:46,167 - Well, come on in. - Sure. 381 00:29:53,808 --> 00:29:55,435 Ready. 382 00:29:55,810 --> 00:29:57,141 Go. 383 00:30:02,717 --> 00:30:06,380 - Man, what an arm. - Ready. Go. 384 00:30:33,281 --> 00:30:36,978 Hanon, nice try. All right, guys. Let's give it another shot. 385 00:30:37,151 --> 00:30:39,312 Use your hands. 386 00:30:39,821 --> 00:30:43,757 Ready. Go! 387 00:30:46,094 --> 00:30:49,495 Oh, good catch, guys. Good catch! 388 00:30:50,832 --> 00:30:53,995 My mom says the pads you gave me weren't enough. 389 00:31:00,742 --> 00:31:02,232 Push him. 390 00:31:06,214 --> 00:31:08,273 Hey, this is great. Keep it up. 391 00:31:08,449 --> 00:31:09,473 I don't feel a... 392 00:31:12,687 --> 00:31:15,850 - Jake? - Jake? 393 00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:29,327 - He will never do it. - They've done it already. 394 00:31:29,504 --> 00:31:31,301 - Make your bet. - Make your bet. 395 00:31:31,472 --> 00:31:34,703 If these boys don't win, I sweep the shop for three weeks. 396 00:31:34,876 --> 00:31:38,141 It's gonna be a landslide, and I'll say it again. 397 00:31:38,313 --> 00:31:41,714 - lf they don't win, I'll sweep it for a month. - Good. 398 00:31:41,883 --> 00:31:44,579 - You got witnesses. Understand? - Remember this. 399 00:31:44,752 --> 00:31:46,549 Stand like this. Come on in. 400 00:31:46,721 --> 00:31:50,418 It's a huddle. Huddle, Latin for round. Turn around. There you go. 401 00:31:50,592 --> 00:31:54,653 Communication is the key. I signal the quarterback with the play. 402 00:31:54,829 --> 00:31:59,528 He relates it to you in the huddle. Then, we try it on the field. Okay, let's do it. 403 00:31:59,901 --> 00:32:02,995 Okay, guys. It's a curl out to the fullback on two. 404 00:32:03,171 --> 00:32:06,402 Hey, wait a second. How come we never call a play for me? 405 00:32:06,574 --> 00:32:08,405 - You're a tackle, dip-head. - Hey! 406 00:32:08,576 --> 00:32:11,010 Nobody calls me a dip-head except my sister. 407 00:32:11,179 --> 00:32:13,170 Hey, guys. Guys. Guys, wait! 408 00:32:13,348 --> 00:32:15,373 Guys, I'll run the ball. 409 00:32:15,550 --> 00:32:18,348 You always run the ball. Why can't I run the ball? 410 00:32:18,519 --> 00:32:20,919 Because you're slow and no one likes you. 411 00:32:21,089 --> 00:32:23,057 - Says who? - Everybody says. 412 00:32:23,524 --> 00:32:24,923 - I call the play. - You suck! 413 00:32:25,093 --> 00:32:26,856 I want to run the ball. 414 00:32:27,028 --> 00:32:29,553 - You can't go to my birthday party. - So what? 415 00:32:32,367 --> 00:32:36,030 Okay, guys. That was good for a first time. Let's try it again. 416 00:32:36,204 --> 00:32:38,604 Ready. Go! 417 00:32:43,277 --> 00:32:45,108 Nice pass. Nice catch. 418 00:32:48,449 --> 00:32:49,746 Junior. 419 00:32:56,624 --> 00:32:59,616 Ready. Go! 420 00:33:04,799 --> 00:33:07,393 - Yeah! - Yes! 421 00:33:07,568 --> 00:33:09,160 All right! 422 00:33:12,340 --> 00:33:17,141 Very nice. Okay, from now on, we'll play with this. Put this in the bathroom. 423 00:33:29,924 --> 00:33:33,587 - Good job, Icebox. - Thanks. 424 00:33:33,761 --> 00:33:34,853 Anytime. 425 00:33:39,100 --> 00:33:43,127 - I'll get the quarterback. - Hut one. Hut two. 426 00:33:44,772 --> 00:33:46,763 Got you! 427 00:33:49,110 --> 00:33:51,772 Okay, Icebox. You can get off me. 428 00:33:51,946 --> 00:33:54,540 Oh, sorry. 429 00:33:59,053 --> 00:34:04,047 Gentlemen, that is your opponent. You must defeat her at all costs. 430 00:34:04,225 --> 00:34:06,455 Patterson, Becky is all they've got. 431 00:34:06,627 --> 00:34:09,391 She's strong. I want you to hit her low and hard. 432 00:34:09,564 --> 00:34:10,861 Get in your position. 433 00:34:11,032 --> 00:34:14,058 Head up, butt down. Stick and drive. 434 00:34:14,368 --> 00:34:15,801 Set. Go! 435 00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:23,539 Oh, son. Son, it's a couch cushion. It's a couch cushion, son! 436 00:34:23,711 --> 00:34:26,509 I want you to wrap your arms and drive through it. 437 00:34:26,681 --> 00:34:30,378 - Stand back. Let the master do this. - Let's go, coach! 438 00:34:30,551 --> 00:34:33,987 - Priscilla, I want you to shoot this. - Go for it, Daddy. 439 00:34:34,822 --> 00:34:39,259 Briggs, count it off. 440 00:34:42,897 --> 00:34:44,660 Ready. 441 00:34:44,899 --> 00:34:46,764 Set. Go! 442 00:34:48,336 --> 00:34:49,735 Kevin! 443 00:34:56,344 --> 00:34:59,245 Oh, doctor! 444 00:35:01,549 --> 00:35:03,414 Coach! 445 00:35:03,584 --> 00:35:04,915 Daddy! 446 00:35:10,491 --> 00:35:14,518 If there's gonna be pee wee football in Urbania, everybody's gonna play. 447 00:35:14,695 --> 00:35:19,860 Big round of applause for the Little Giants. 448 00:35:23,204 --> 00:35:25,536 She's buff. She's bad. 449 00:35:25,706 --> 00:35:30,040 She's Becky "The Icebox" O'Shea. 450 00:35:31,279 --> 00:35:36,615 All right. Let's give it up for "Rad" Tad Simpson. 451 00:35:41,789 --> 00:35:46,488 Rudy Zolteck, your neighborhood-friendly gasman. 452 00:35:48,930 --> 00:35:51,057 Gasman? I don't get it. 453 00:35:51,232 --> 00:35:52,563 Think about it. 454 00:35:52,733 --> 00:35:56,567 Here's Rasheed "Hot Hands" Hanon! 455 00:36:01,642 --> 00:36:06,409 Say hello to Timmy "I Wanna Score" Moore. 456 00:36:12,019 --> 00:36:13,816 - Thanks for coming. - That was great. 457 00:36:13,988 --> 00:36:16,422 - I want a copy of that. - You got it. 458 00:36:16,591 --> 00:36:19,754 Johnny, I thought I was gonna meet your dad tonight. 459 00:36:19,927 --> 00:36:23,920 He's got business and stuff. See you, coach. 460 00:36:24,098 --> 00:36:26,157 - I'll see you. - Bye. 461 00:36:26,334 --> 00:36:28,996 Well, the dip sucked. 462 00:36:29,170 --> 00:36:31,934 But bottom line, you're okay, Coach O'Shea. 463 00:36:32,106 --> 00:36:33,937 Thanks, Junior. 464 00:36:34,108 --> 00:36:37,339 Do you have time to get me your brother's autograph? 465 00:36:37,511 --> 00:36:40,605 Oh, let's go. 466 00:36:41,449 --> 00:36:43,747 - This was such a blast. - It was nothing. 467 00:36:43,918 --> 00:36:46,785 No, you're doing an amazing job with those kids. 468 00:36:46,954 --> 00:36:51,015 All that time I knew you, I had no idea that you would be like this. 469 00:36:51,192 --> 00:36:53,490 - Well, I was 11. - Yeah. 470 00:36:53,661 --> 00:36:55,959 I guess I've changed. 471 00:36:56,130 --> 00:36:58,291 Yeah, I guess you're right. 472 00:36:58,466 --> 00:36:59,490 Have I changed? 473 00:36:59,967 --> 00:37:03,630 Well, you're taller, and you have your driver's license. 474 00:37:03,804 --> 00:37:09,367 And to be honest with you, your face is exactly as I remember it. 475 00:37:10,144 --> 00:37:12,544 Come on, Mom. 476 00:37:14,548 --> 00:37:16,311 Good night, Danny. 477 00:37:16,484 --> 00:37:18,384 See you, coach. 478 00:37:18,552 --> 00:37:21,385 Good night, you guys. Sleep tightly. 479 00:37:21,555 --> 00:37:23,216 Tightly? 480 00:37:23,391 --> 00:37:25,325 Dumb. 481 00:37:25,726 --> 00:37:28,524 Okay, let's clean it up. 482 00:37:31,232 --> 00:37:33,666 There he goes. 483 00:37:34,502 --> 00:37:36,561 I love this. Wait, wait, wait. 484 00:37:38,506 --> 00:37:42,738 Hey, Karen, how many times you gonna watch this? It's making me nauseous. 485 00:37:42,910 --> 00:37:43,899 You kill me. 486 00:37:44,078 --> 00:37:47,912 No, Mom. Mom, let's calm down. Let's calm down. 487 00:37:48,082 --> 00:37:52,246 You know, I was only trying to make a point that Becky's all they got... 488 00:37:52,420 --> 00:37:55,184 ...and to win, we've gotta neutralize her. 489 00:37:55,356 --> 00:37:57,881 Wait, wait, wait. What about Junior? 490 00:38:00,061 --> 00:38:01,050 Who? 491 00:38:03,931 --> 00:38:08,925 Hut one! Hut two! Hut three! 492 00:38:12,273 --> 00:38:14,741 Look at the cannon on that kid. 493 00:38:16,944 --> 00:38:18,741 He's playing for the wrong team. 494 00:38:18,913 --> 00:38:22,110 Hut one! Hut two! Hut three! 495 00:38:26,387 --> 00:38:29,413 - Yeah! - That's the way. All right. Come on back. 496 00:38:34,228 --> 00:38:37,061 That's good, Johnny. Keep your head up. 497 00:38:37,231 --> 00:38:39,392 Spies. 498 00:38:39,567 --> 00:38:42,934 - Where? - In the weeds. 499 00:38:43,637 --> 00:38:45,969 Somebody's a little scared, huh? 500 00:38:47,241 --> 00:38:51,575 Okay. Take a little break. Then, we'll start running the super-secret play. 501 00:38:51,746 --> 00:38:53,839 I'm just gonna get the diagram. 502 00:38:54,582 --> 00:38:56,743 Coach, they're gonna do the super-secret play. 503 00:38:58,911 --> 00:39:02,472 State police? Oh, thank God. This is Thelma May Rogers. 504 00:39:02,648 --> 00:39:04,411 I'm 86. I live in Urbania. 505 00:39:04,583 --> 00:39:07,882 There are two men down the bridge from the Shell station... 506 00:39:08,053 --> 00:39:10,988 ...in the bushes spying on some kids. 507 00:39:11,156 --> 00:39:12,589 We're all so upset. 508 00:39:12,758 --> 00:39:17,092 I don't think men their age should be parading around in their underwear. 509 00:39:17,262 --> 00:39:19,753 Please, hurry. 510 00:39:19,932 --> 00:39:21,194 - Nice going. - Yeah. 511 00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:25,595 This is incredible. They got the guards in the backfield. 512 00:39:25,771 --> 00:39:30,174 They... They got the center to the right, and... 513 00:39:30,342 --> 00:39:32,776 And the quarterback isn't even there. 514 00:39:32,945 --> 00:39:36,005 They're standing around, Butz. 515 00:39:39,785 --> 00:39:41,047 Oh, yeah. 516 00:39:42,354 --> 00:39:43,946 Freeze! 517 00:39:45,424 --> 00:39:48,621 - I'm on a roll, huh? - Your sandwich, dangerous one. 518 00:39:48,794 --> 00:39:51,957 Last night, I go out the window. Today, I'm arrested... 519 00:39:52,130 --> 00:39:54,963 ...handcuffed, humiliated. My own brother! 520 00:39:55,133 --> 00:39:57,795 lmagine how I feel married to a peeping Tom. 521 00:39:57,970 --> 00:39:59,562 That was a brilliant move... 522 00:39:59,738 --> 00:40:02,639 ...calling the state cops instead of the local cops. 523 00:40:02,808 --> 00:40:06,141 I didn't think Danny had it in him. I will get him back. 524 00:40:06,311 --> 00:40:09,542 This could've been avoided if you'd just formed one team. 525 00:40:09,715 --> 00:40:13,481 Don't you understand that the people of this town expect me to win? 526 00:40:13,652 --> 00:40:18,385 - Nobody buys a Chevy from a loser! - Honey, this is peewee football. Remember? 527 00:40:18,557 --> 00:40:21,048 - It's supposed to be fun. - It's not fun anymore. 528 00:40:21,226 --> 00:40:25,686 See, all the fun is gone now. See, now it's war. 529 00:40:26,565 --> 00:40:28,931 Come on. Let's go. Keep moving. 530 00:40:31,470 --> 00:40:33,529 Come on. Make that cut. 531 00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:38,105 Come on. Come on. Protect the ball. Good. Good. 532 00:40:39,511 --> 00:40:42,446 Lift them. Lift those legs. Thattaboy. 533 00:40:43,015 --> 00:40:44,448 Drive, drive, drive! 534 00:40:44,616 --> 00:40:46,584 Come on. Unload on this thing! 535 00:40:49,287 --> 00:40:51,619 Very nice. Looking good. Looking good. 536 00:40:51,790 --> 00:40:55,419 Hit. Hit. Hit. Hit. Hit. 537 00:40:55,594 --> 00:40:58,028 That's right, guys. Make them pop. 538 00:41:00,699 --> 00:41:02,360 Yes! 539 00:41:56,154 --> 00:41:58,952 You'll have to put the top up if you want us to wash it. 540 00:41:59,124 --> 00:42:00,751 I didn't come for a car wash. 541 00:42:00,926 --> 00:42:05,488 You're wasting our time with this team. We should concentrate on Sutterville. 542 00:42:05,664 --> 00:42:09,532 Jeez, Dan, you don't even belong on the same field as your brother. 543 00:42:09,701 --> 00:42:12,033 One dollar for the wash, Butz. 544 00:42:12,671 --> 00:42:15,834 You'll just embarrass yourself with them dirt-balls. 545 00:42:16,108 --> 00:42:19,942 Hell, if I was a mama hen and they was my chicks... 546 00:42:20,112 --> 00:42:23,513 ...l'd lead them to water and let them drown. 547 00:42:23,682 --> 00:42:26,845 Harold, you're the tenth car that's come in here today. 548 00:42:27,018 --> 00:42:28,952 You're entitled to a free wash. 549 00:42:29,121 --> 00:42:31,180 Okay, guys. Wash it. 550 00:42:55,814 --> 00:42:58,806 Hey, Junior. 551 00:43:05,724 --> 00:43:07,658 Truce. 552 00:43:09,728 --> 00:43:11,719 No! 553 00:43:13,999 --> 00:43:17,162 Hey, Dan, we're next. 554 00:43:17,335 --> 00:43:18,825 - Hey, Uncle Dan. - Hi, Deb. 555 00:43:19,004 --> 00:43:20,232 - Hi, Junior. - Hey. 556 00:43:20,405 --> 00:43:24,102 Hey, Becky, check it out. My mom got us new uniforms for the game. 557 00:43:24,576 --> 00:43:26,908 - Cool. - I am so jealous of you... 558 00:43:27,078 --> 00:43:31,742 ...being in the huddle with Junior Floyd! Even 12-year-old girls think he's a fox. 559 00:43:31,917 --> 00:43:35,512 - Yeah, well, I really don't notice. - Well, see you. 560 00:43:35,687 --> 00:43:37,177 Yeah. 561 00:43:37,355 --> 00:43:38,515 Hey. Hi, Junior. 562 00:43:38,690 --> 00:43:39,679 What's up? 563 00:43:39,858 --> 00:43:43,259 I wanted to let you know I'm gonna be at the game Saturday. 564 00:43:43,428 --> 00:43:46,454 Hey, Icebox, maybe you should become a cheerleader. 565 00:43:48,767 --> 00:43:50,098 Bubbles and stuff. 566 00:43:54,206 --> 00:43:56,606 Junior! 567 00:43:56,775 --> 00:43:59,300 Hey, don't! 568 00:44:01,112 --> 00:44:02,306 There you go. 569 00:44:22,133 --> 00:44:25,330 Give me a J Give me a U 570 00:44:25,503 --> 00:44:28,097 - Give me an N - Becky! 571 00:44:32,644 --> 00:44:35,306 Hey, I got an idea for a whole new defense. 572 00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:39,746 I read about a monster-back thing where you run around causing destruction. 573 00:44:40,418 --> 00:44:42,750 Are you wearing lipstick? 574 00:44:43,088 --> 00:44:46,148 No. It's a cherry Tootsie Pop. 575 00:44:57,769 --> 00:44:59,202 O'Shea Chevrolet. 576 00:44:59,437 --> 00:45:01,871 I got a hot tip for you, Mr. Heisman. 577 00:45:03,008 --> 00:45:05,033 Butz! 578 00:45:05,277 --> 00:45:09,008 - Go ahead, Orville. I'm listening. - There's a new family in town. 579 00:45:09,180 --> 00:45:11,978 They got a tough 10-year-old. He's a monster. 580 00:45:12,150 --> 00:45:14,015 Now I'm talking real big. 581 00:45:14,185 --> 00:45:15,345 Oh, yeah? How big? 582 00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:16,782 Put it this way. 583 00:45:16,955 --> 00:45:19,890 If he was a trout, you wouldn't throw him back. 584 00:45:20,058 --> 00:45:23,960 - Thanks a lot, buddy. I owe you one. - Thanks. 585 00:45:33,538 --> 00:45:36,803 - Hi, big Jim. - Hey there, Kevin. 586 00:45:40,879 --> 00:45:43,143 Hey, Kev. Where you going? 587 00:45:43,315 --> 00:45:45,977 Just out for a little spin, Danny. 588 00:45:46,151 --> 00:45:47,550 What's with the go-cart? 589 00:45:47,986 --> 00:45:51,012 Becky asked me to check the compression. 590 00:46:02,334 --> 00:46:04,325 - You following me? - No. 591 00:46:05,904 --> 00:46:07,166 You following me? 592 00:46:07,339 --> 00:46:09,239 No. 593 00:46:10,342 --> 00:46:12,708 - Are you lying to me? - No. 594 00:46:14,579 --> 00:46:16,444 He's mine, Danny! Damn it! 595 00:46:16,614 --> 00:46:19,174 Here they come! Danny's in the go-cart. 596 00:46:29,694 --> 00:46:31,525 This whole town may love you... 597 00:46:31,696 --> 00:46:34,529 ...but I'm the only one who knows how sick you are. 598 00:46:34,699 --> 00:46:37,566 - I treated you like a prince. - You ignored me! 599 00:46:37,736 --> 00:46:41,638 - I took you to see the Cleveland Indians. - You left me at the stadium. 600 00:47:05,263 --> 00:47:06,992 Damn it! 601 00:47:27,752 --> 00:47:29,151 Excuse me. 602 00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:31,254 Are you...? 603 00:47:31,423 --> 00:47:34,119 Hey, don't tell me. You're Coach O'Shea. 604 00:47:35,660 --> 00:47:37,287 Yeah, I'm Coach O'Shea. 605 00:47:38,329 --> 00:47:42,823 You're Coach O'Shea! Who am I? Look at this. 606 00:47:44,602 --> 00:47:45,933 Who am I? 607 00:47:46,438 --> 00:47:49,168 Oh, you're remembering my old playing days. 608 00:47:49,340 --> 00:47:51,274 Remembering them? I treasure them. 609 00:47:51,443 --> 00:47:55,812 You're the reason we moved to this town, you and that football league. 610 00:47:56,548 --> 00:48:01,281 You... You look kind of small for a football star. 611 00:48:05,657 --> 00:48:08,182 That's what they all thought. 612 00:48:10,361 --> 00:48:12,022 Yeah. 613 00:48:12,197 --> 00:48:14,825 - So where is your? - His name's Spike. 614 00:48:14,999 --> 00:48:16,523 He's right here. 615 00:48:16,701 --> 00:48:18,134 Hang on a second. Spike! 616 00:48:18,536 --> 00:48:20,800 Come on down here. 617 00:48:21,806 --> 00:48:24,036 I want you to meet Coach O'Shea. 618 00:48:30,882 --> 00:48:34,079 Look at the boy. He was bred for football glory. 619 00:48:34,252 --> 00:48:36,652 The first skin he touched was a pigskin. 620 00:48:36,821 --> 00:48:40,814 Pushing a football across the floor with his head at four months old. 621 00:48:40,992 --> 00:48:44,928 Did his first pull-up when he was 18 months. Give me 10! 622 00:48:46,164 --> 00:48:49,656 Runs a 40 in 6.5 flat. Bench-presses twice his own weight. 623 00:48:50,068 --> 00:48:54,937 Won the 8-year-old division of the pass, punt, run when he was 5 years old. 624 00:48:55,406 --> 00:49:00,742 O'Shea, I've been cultivating him, grooming him. 625 00:49:00,912 --> 00:49:03,176 Every night, before he goes to bed... 626 00:49:03,348 --> 00:49:08,411 ...I massage his hamstrings with evaporated milk. Yeah. 627 00:49:10,522 --> 00:49:12,251 He's quite a boy. 628 00:49:12,824 --> 00:49:13,950 Play to die! 629 00:49:14,259 --> 00:49:16,591 Knees high! Knees high! 630 00:49:16,861 --> 00:49:20,262 Guys, I got great news. 631 00:49:20,698 --> 00:49:22,188 We got a new player. 632 00:49:22,600 --> 00:49:23,692 Mama! 633 00:49:23,868 --> 00:49:26,598 - Who's that? - Looks like a side of beef. 634 00:49:26,771 --> 00:49:29,535 Or a genetics experiment gone terribly wrong. 635 00:49:29,707 --> 00:49:31,937 - Where's his socks? - Where's his neck? 636 00:49:32,110 --> 00:49:33,702 He's bigger than my dad. 637 00:49:33,878 --> 00:49:39,817 Spike's in hell. Spike's in peewee hell. 638 00:49:39,984 --> 00:49:41,918 Guys, Spike's our new tailback. 639 00:49:42,086 --> 00:49:44,714 Now we can run the annexation of Puerto Rico. 640 00:49:44,889 --> 00:49:48,120 - What's that? - I don't know if we're ready for that. 641 00:49:48,293 --> 00:49:53,822 - What formation do you like to run out of? - Power-I. Now, who's Spike's lead blocker? 642 00:49:54,299 --> 00:49:55,391 The Icebox. 643 00:49:55,567 --> 00:49:58,730 - Where's he at? - Right here. 644 00:49:59,137 --> 00:50:02,800 Is Spike mistaken? Aren't you a girl? 645 00:50:02,974 --> 00:50:04,236 Gee, good eye. 646 00:50:04,409 --> 00:50:07,742 - Spike don't play with girls. - She's pretty good, Spike. 647 00:50:07,912 --> 00:50:10,472 Spike don't care. Didn't you hear? 648 00:50:10,815 --> 00:50:12,146 Spike don't play with... 649 00:50:12,750 --> 00:50:15,913 I can tackle anything, anytime, anywhere. Got that? 650 00:50:16,087 --> 00:50:19,420 Look, you berserk-o Barbie doll, when you mess with Spike... 651 00:50:19,591 --> 00:50:22,958 ...you mess with death. - Can you walk the walk? 652 00:50:23,127 --> 00:50:24,151 - Try me! - I will! 653 00:50:24,329 --> 00:50:25,956 - Let's go! - Right now! 654 00:50:26,130 --> 00:50:27,961 Somebody call 911! 655 00:50:28,266 --> 00:50:31,030 All right. Okay. Okay. Hold it. 656 00:50:32,770 --> 00:50:35,170 Becky, wanna get that car for me, please? 657 00:50:35,340 --> 00:50:38,366 Why me? So you can play with this ape? 658 00:50:39,611 --> 00:50:42,444 Can I have a little word with you, please? 659 00:50:47,118 --> 00:50:49,609 Your leg's bigger than my body. 660 00:50:49,787 --> 00:50:52,847 With this guy, we got an actual shot at winning this. 661 00:50:53,024 --> 00:50:56,960 Give me a minute to get him used to the idea of playing with a girl. 662 00:50:57,128 --> 00:51:00,120 You don't think I can take him, do you? 663 00:51:01,532 --> 00:51:04,626 This is a bunch of crap. 664 00:51:23,321 --> 00:51:25,812 - Shirley. - Hi, Kevin. 665 00:51:32,230 --> 00:51:34,721 Icebox not hungry? 666 00:51:34,899 --> 00:51:37,390 Alert the media. 667 00:51:37,735 --> 00:51:42,001 - How you doing, hotshot? - Hey, Louise. Thank you, dear. 668 00:51:44,842 --> 00:51:47,003 Good shot. 669 00:51:47,178 --> 00:51:50,409 - You still mad at me for not picking you? - No. 670 00:51:50,581 --> 00:51:53,846 - I guess you got your own team now. - It's not my team. 671 00:51:54,018 --> 00:51:56,851 It's Spike's team. 672 00:51:58,356 --> 00:52:00,916 Dad's got a big crush on him. 673 00:52:01,092 --> 00:52:03,322 Don't be so hard on the old man. 674 00:52:03,494 --> 00:52:07,021 It can't be easy on him having me as a brother... 675 00:52:07,198 --> 00:52:09,792 ...or you as a daughter. 676 00:52:09,967 --> 00:52:11,696 Very funny. 677 00:52:11,869 --> 00:52:14,770 People like you and me, we're stubborn. 678 00:52:14,939 --> 00:52:18,204 If we don't get our own way, watch out. 679 00:52:18,376 --> 00:52:21,903 When you played football you wanted to kill your coach too? 680 00:52:22,080 --> 00:52:24,742 Hey, you can't fault the guy for trying to win. 681 00:52:25,216 --> 00:52:27,616 He doesn't wanna win. 682 00:52:27,785 --> 00:52:30,219 He wants to prove he's not scared of you. 683 00:52:30,621 --> 00:52:31,713 What do you want? 684 00:52:32,123 --> 00:52:35,889 I thought I wanted to play, but now there's all this other stuff. 685 00:52:36,060 --> 00:52:38,290 What other stuff? 686 00:52:38,463 --> 00:52:41,227 Not football stuff. 687 00:52:43,568 --> 00:52:47,060 Debbie likes Junior, doesn't she? 688 00:52:47,739 --> 00:52:50,003 Does Veronica like Archie? 689 00:52:52,810 --> 00:52:55,938 She's gonna get him. I know it. 690 00:52:56,581 --> 00:53:00,483 You know, she'd probably kill me if she knew I told you this... 691 00:53:00,651 --> 00:53:05,918 ...but you wanna find a boy, you gotta figure out how boys think. 692 00:53:06,090 --> 00:53:10,754 And if this boy's a quarterback, he's probably gonna want some cute girl... 693 00:53:10,928 --> 00:53:12,486 ...not some teammate. 694 00:53:14,265 --> 00:53:16,756 But I don't know about being a cute girl. 695 00:53:16,934 --> 00:53:18,333 I'm good at sports. 696 00:53:18,503 --> 00:53:21,768 Of course you are. You're an O'Shea. 697 00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:26,936 But listen to me. You got a lot more to offer than football. 698 00:53:27,945 --> 00:53:29,879 - A lot more. - You think so? 699 00:53:30,047 --> 00:53:32,277 I know so. 700 00:53:33,117 --> 00:53:35,642 Hey, Uncle Kevin. 701 00:53:38,122 --> 00:53:40,454 Do you think I'm pretty? 702 00:53:40,625 --> 00:53:41,819 No. 703 00:53:44,462 --> 00:53:46,953 I think you're beautiful. 704 00:53:58,643 --> 00:54:01,635 Okay, guys. Let's make this power-I formation work. 705 00:54:01,813 --> 00:54:04,646 - Ready! - Break! 706 00:54:07,718 --> 00:54:10,312 Ready. Set. 707 00:54:10,488 --> 00:54:13,889 Hut one. Hut two! 708 00:54:17,662 --> 00:54:20,392 You call this a team? 709 00:54:21,732 --> 00:54:24,496 Hey, pretty boy, when you hand off to Spike... 710 00:54:24,669 --> 00:54:26,899 ...put it here. Boom! 711 00:54:27,071 --> 00:54:28,663 And you, fat lineman! 712 00:54:29,006 --> 00:54:30,667 You rang? 713 00:54:30,842 --> 00:54:33,333 Get your jellyrolls out of Spike's way... 714 00:54:33,511 --> 00:54:36,207 ...unless you want cleat marks up your fat back. 715 00:54:38,916 --> 00:54:40,907 Spike! 716 00:54:41,586 --> 00:54:44,077 Come get in the car, son. 717 00:54:44,522 --> 00:54:45,784 What's going on? 718 00:54:45,957 --> 00:54:49,415 Oh, no. 719 00:54:50,261 --> 00:54:51,592 You're a Cowboy now. 720 00:54:51,762 --> 00:54:54,128 Thank you, football god. 721 00:54:54,298 --> 00:54:55,424 Where's he going? 722 00:54:55,600 --> 00:54:57,591 So you're a Heisman Trophy winner? 723 00:54:57,768 --> 00:55:00,566 I said I was Coach O'Shea, not Kevin. 724 00:55:00,738 --> 00:55:03,070 You must think you're pretty slick, huh? 725 00:55:03,241 --> 00:55:05,266 I can't wait till tomorrow. 726 00:55:05,443 --> 00:55:08,037 One more day, baby! 727 00:55:08,613 --> 00:55:10,740 One more day. 728 00:55:19,590 --> 00:55:23,048 - Great. Now the other guys have Spike. - We got nothing. 729 00:55:23,227 --> 00:55:24,956 - We got us. - Yeah, we stink! 730 00:55:25,129 --> 00:55:28,292 - Because you can't catch. - At least he can walk. 731 00:55:28,466 --> 00:55:33,802 - Hey, Zolteck, have another Pop-Tart. - Or can't you open your mouth wide enough? 732 00:55:33,971 --> 00:55:37,407 - Come on, that's enough. - Yeah, coach is right. Break it up. 733 00:55:37,575 --> 00:55:40,271 Shut up, Junior. You're so good it makes us sick. 734 00:55:40,811 --> 00:55:46,647 Hey, you don't want me to play? No problemo. I'm out of here. 735 00:55:46,817 --> 00:55:49,650 If it wasn't for him, we wouldn't even have a team. 736 00:55:49,820 --> 00:55:54,348 If it wasn't for him, maybe you'd stop drooling and play a little more football. 737 00:55:54,525 --> 00:55:55,753 Yeah, he's right! 738 00:55:56,894 --> 00:55:58,885 Why can't we all play together? 739 00:55:59,063 --> 00:56:02,931 Oh, shut up, dipstick! You're probably the main reason Spike quit. 740 00:56:03,100 --> 00:56:05,000 Yeah, quit bawling, you big baby. 741 00:56:05,169 --> 00:56:09,435 I can cry if I want. It's a free country. I can even do this. 742 00:56:11,175 --> 00:56:13,143 Nice kick! 743 00:56:15,780 --> 00:56:17,771 Hey, guys, practice isn't over yet. 744 00:56:17,949 --> 00:56:20,782 Who cares? 745 00:56:34,565 --> 00:56:40,299 What's the use? I am a dipstick. I'll never get to play. 746 00:56:42,139 --> 00:56:43,663 Hey, kid, you got a second? 747 00:56:43,841 --> 00:56:47,641 We have to get to a banquet in Canton, where the Hall of Fame is. 748 00:56:47,812 --> 00:56:52,146 And we took a wrong turn somewhere. Look, we started out here on l-7 east. 749 00:56:52,316 --> 00:56:54,682 We're coming across here. We went up 104. 750 00:56:54,852 --> 00:56:59,152 We took the 49. Then we were gonna take shortcuts. We go 10, 12, 48. Hut. 751 00:56:59,323 --> 00:57:02,315 And we have to hit Canton, and we have to hit it hard. 752 00:57:02,493 --> 00:57:04,393 And I don't know where we are! 753 00:57:07,331 --> 00:57:09,322 Guys? 754 00:57:10,167 --> 00:57:11,361 Now what? 755 00:57:11,736 --> 00:57:14,671 Let's play some ball. 756 00:57:18,075 --> 00:57:20,100 - Steve Emtman. - Emmitt Smith. 757 00:57:20,277 --> 00:57:21,767 Tim Brown. 758 00:57:21,946 --> 00:57:24,540 - Bruce Smith. - Emmitt Smith. 759 00:57:30,054 --> 00:57:31,919 Take a shot. Just block me. 760 00:57:33,924 --> 00:57:35,551 Come on. You can do it. 761 00:57:37,028 --> 00:57:38,518 - No way. - Don't be scared. 762 00:57:38,696 --> 00:57:40,994 Run through me. Run through me. Come on. 763 00:57:41,165 --> 00:57:44,191 Get the fear out of your eyes! Let's go! Come on! 764 00:57:50,041 --> 00:57:51,736 Yeah! 765 00:57:54,378 --> 00:57:56,437 All right. All right now. Good job. 766 00:57:56,614 --> 00:58:01,210 Just remember, football's 80%% mental, 40%% physical. 767 00:58:01,552 --> 00:58:03,611 - Right. - Right. 768 00:58:05,122 --> 00:58:06,111 What? 769 00:58:06,457 --> 00:58:09,654 I wasn't always the biggest. I wasn't always the fastest. 770 00:58:10,227 --> 00:58:13,628 I wasn't always the smartest. But I believed within myself... 771 00:58:13,964 --> 00:58:15,454 ...that I was a giant. 772 00:58:15,733 --> 00:58:19,464 He pivots, fakes, chucks the big bomb halfway down the field... 773 00:58:19,637 --> 00:58:22,401 ...to our, hopefully, still wide-open tailback. 774 00:58:22,573 --> 00:58:25,064 I call it the annexation of Puerto Rico. 775 00:58:25,242 --> 00:58:27,073 - Not bad. - Really? 776 00:58:27,244 --> 00:58:29,075 I kind of stole it from you. 777 00:58:29,246 --> 00:58:31,646 Raiders-Vikings, Super Bowl XI. 778 00:58:31,816 --> 00:58:33,909 Hey, you are a genius. 779 00:58:34,085 --> 00:58:38,317 Thanks. Problem is we don't have a tailback. 780 00:58:40,091 --> 00:58:43,288 Listen, what if you tried this? 781 00:58:43,461 --> 00:58:45,656 You know what this is called? 782 00:58:47,665 --> 00:58:49,257 Intimidation. 783 00:58:49,600 --> 00:58:50,760 Cool. 784 00:58:51,769 --> 00:58:54,260 Now, tomorrow, when you go to the game... 785 00:58:54,438 --> 00:58:58,272 ...you don't want to be intimidated. So let me see your game faces. 786 00:59:00,444 --> 00:59:02,844 No, no. You can do better than that. 787 00:59:03,013 --> 00:59:04,844 Let me see your game faces. 788 00:59:07,785 --> 00:59:09,616 Try this. 789 00:59:11,088 --> 00:59:12,715 You're getting it. 790 00:59:12,957 --> 00:59:15,118 That's it, guys. Now come and get me. 791 00:59:23,634 --> 00:59:25,693 - Mind if I ask you something? - Yeah. 792 00:59:25,870 --> 00:59:29,362 I got kind of a big game coming up. You got any advice? 793 00:59:29,540 --> 00:59:32,304 - Good luck. - What, that's it? 794 00:59:32,476 --> 00:59:34,808 - Later. - See you, Steve. Bye, Emmitt. 795 00:59:34,979 --> 00:59:36,469 - Have a good trip. - Thanks. 796 00:59:36,647 --> 00:59:41,641 There's no big secret to winning football. It's doing what these guys do every game. 797 00:59:41,886 --> 00:59:44,150 Just go out and give it your best. 798 00:59:44,655 --> 00:59:48,216 Bottom line, I took a team to a Super Bowl, and we won. 799 00:59:48,392 --> 00:59:51,759 I even had some guys on that team that nobody wanted. 800 00:59:51,996 --> 00:59:54,726 But we were a team, and that's what you guys are. 801 00:59:54,899 --> 00:59:59,393 You're a football team. That's like a family, except you get to hit each other. 802 00:59:59,570 --> 01:00:04,030 But you have to stick together. Do that, and you'll be fine. 803 01:00:04,208 --> 01:00:05,539 Thanks, Mr. Madden. 804 01:00:05,709 --> 01:00:08,177 - Thanks, Mr. Madden. - See you! 805 01:00:08,345 --> 01:00:11,075 Let me tell you people something. 806 01:00:11,248 --> 01:00:13,682 This ain't just a football. 807 01:00:14,185 --> 01:00:19,248 This is your hopes, your dreams, your ambitions, your soul in a roll. 808 01:00:19,423 --> 01:00:21,254 It's your life. 809 01:00:21,425 --> 01:00:26,294 Tomorrow on that field, it's do or die. Win or cry! 810 01:00:26,463 --> 01:00:28,522 Go, baby! Go! 811 01:00:29,433 --> 01:00:33,426 Men, tonight when you go home, I want you to brush your little teeth. 812 01:00:33,604 --> 01:00:35,697 I want you to wash your little faces. 813 01:00:35,873 --> 01:00:38,865 And I want you to dream of football glory... 814 01:00:39,043 --> 01:00:44,037 ...because tomorrow, we're gonna crush the Little Giants into smithereens. 815 01:00:44,215 --> 01:00:46,115 - What do you say, men? - Yeah! 816 01:00:46,283 --> 01:00:47,272 Yeah! 817 01:01:08,973 --> 01:01:10,270 - Guess who. - Who? 818 01:01:10,441 --> 01:01:11,635 - Me. - Hey, Junior. 819 01:01:11,809 --> 01:01:17,406 Hey, that's disgusting. It looks like they're trying to swallow each other's heads. 820 01:01:17,581 --> 01:01:19,173 They're doing it all wrong. 821 01:01:19,350 --> 01:01:23,946 You have to move your head dramatic, like Kevin Costner in Robin Hood. Like this. 822 01:01:24,121 --> 01:01:27,989 No. In movies, they do that chicken-pecking, mouth half-open thing. 823 01:01:28,158 --> 01:01:30,922 Like this. "Hey, baby." 824 01:01:31,929 --> 01:01:33,920 No. 825 01:01:34,098 --> 01:01:39,297 Check this out. My cousin told me that her and her boyfriend use their tongues. 826 01:01:40,004 --> 01:01:42,837 - That's disgusting. - I know. Spit swappers. 827 01:01:43,007 --> 01:01:47,000 - Yeah, kind of like them. - Tonsil hockey. 828 01:01:50,514 --> 01:01:53,779 You know the only problem with kissing your own hand is? 829 01:01:53,951 --> 01:01:54,940 What? 830 01:01:55,119 --> 01:01:58,350 - It doesn't kiss back. - You wanna learn how to kiss? 831 01:01:58,522 --> 01:02:02,117 - I didn't say that. Do you? - No. I just got that vomit taste. 832 01:02:02,293 --> 01:02:04,955 Hey, we'll have to learn how sooner or later... 833 01:02:05,129 --> 01:02:08,030 ...I mean, if you wanna have kids and get a job. 834 01:02:08,198 --> 01:02:11,395 - You can have kids without kissing. - You can't get a job. 835 01:02:11,568 --> 01:02:14,799 Well, I'll become a teacher. 836 01:02:15,139 --> 01:02:19,735 But what if you were forced to? Wouldn't it be good to learn with a friend? 837 01:02:20,311 --> 01:02:23,144 You know, for scientific purposes. 838 01:02:23,314 --> 01:02:28,217 No way! If I had to learn how to kiss, and I mean absolutely, positively... 839 01:02:28,385 --> 01:02:33,880 ...no way out of it, no matter what, can't get out of it, I had to learn how to kiss... 840 01:02:34,058 --> 01:02:37,892 Well then, I think I'd want to learn with... 841 01:02:38,062 --> 01:02:40,394 Let me guess. 842 01:02:41,065 --> 01:02:44,159 - Debbie. - I don't know. 843 01:02:44,335 --> 01:02:48,738 But if not her, definitely another cheerleader-type, right? 844 01:02:48,906 --> 01:02:52,171 Maybe. I don't know. 845 01:02:52,343 --> 01:02:54,573 Look, this is really weird. 846 01:02:55,346 --> 01:02:57,507 Hey, Junior. 847 01:02:58,349 --> 01:03:01,409 If I was like a cheerleader, you'd wanna learn with me. 848 01:03:01,752 --> 01:03:04,744 But you're not. You're different. 849 01:03:04,922 --> 01:03:07,220 You're cool. You're the Icebox. 850 01:03:07,391 --> 01:03:11,691 Come on, you're probably the only girl I've met that can beat up my dad. 851 01:03:13,764 --> 01:03:16,358 Anyways, I'll see you later. 852 01:03:36,787 --> 01:03:39,278 - Hey. - Hey, Uncle Kev. 853 01:03:39,456 --> 01:03:42,823 Is Aunt Karen home? 854 01:03:49,733 --> 01:03:51,598 Come on in, buddy. 855 01:03:55,739 --> 01:03:57,366 Oh, no, you don't. You can't. 856 01:03:57,541 --> 01:04:00,840 This team has come too far to be shot down on a lousy call. 857 01:04:01,145 --> 01:04:04,512 Watch the grabbing, zebra. They're giving him the business. 858 01:04:04,681 --> 01:04:07,582 What? You're throwing me out? I'll throw you out. 859 01:04:07,751 --> 01:04:09,651 I'll throw your mother out. 860 01:04:09,820 --> 01:04:12,311 - Hi, Dad. - Hey. 861 01:04:12,489 --> 01:04:15,458 - Bye, Dad. - Hang on. What do you got, a victory cake? 862 01:04:15,626 --> 01:04:18,493 - Half that team's allergic to chocolate. - It's not a cake. 863 01:04:18,662 --> 01:04:21,597 You can't sneak away without telling me what it is. 864 01:04:21,765 --> 01:04:23,164 It's nothing. 865 01:04:23,333 --> 01:04:26,268 Okay. If my little fullback wants to surprise me... 866 01:04:26,437 --> 01:04:28,928 ...that's all right with me. 867 01:04:30,107 --> 01:04:32,166 Little fullback? 868 01:04:32,342 --> 01:04:34,333 Your little fullback? 869 01:04:34,678 --> 01:04:38,045 That's all I am to you, isn't it? Your little fullback. 870 01:04:38,949 --> 01:04:41,850 Your ticket to beating Kevin and winning the game. 871 01:04:42,186 --> 01:04:43,517 Becky, what's wrong? 872 01:04:44,021 --> 01:04:46,615 What's wrong? Everything's wrong. 873 01:04:46,790 --> 01:04:50,487 Do you know what Mom used to call me? Her little princess. 874 01:04:50,661 --> 01:04:53,994 When she tucked me in she'd go, "Good night, little princess." 875 01:04:54,164 --> 01:04:56,428 Then she'd kiss me on my cheeks. 876 01:04:56,600 --> 01:04:59,797 Then she'd pull the covers all around me. 877 01:05:00,471 --> 01:05:02,336 And you remember that? 878 01:05:02,873 --> 01:05:04,033 Yeah. 879 01:05:04,208 --> 01:05:06,301 She wouldn't let me play football. 880 01:05:06,477 --> 01:05:09,810 She wouldn't call me her little fullback either. 881 01:05:10,481 --> 01:05:14,747 Becky, look, Mom's not here anymore. She left us. 882 01:05:15,052 --> 01:05:17,486 - She quit. - No! 883 01:05:17,654 --> 01:05:20,817 She didn't quit. She just found a better team. 884 01:05:21,191 --> 01:05:23,318 I'm not playing tomorrow. 885 01:05:23,494 --> 01:05:28,158 This was your idea. This game was the most important thing in the world to you. 886 01:05:28,332 --> 01:05:33,827 No, Dad, this game means everything in the world to you. 887 01:06:03,600 --> 01:06:07,036 Come on, Dad. Throw it in here. 888 01:06:18,615 --> 01:06:22,449 Come on, fellas. Tomorrow's the big one. Don't let me down. 889 01:06:22,619 --> 01:06:26,419 You want intimidation? I'll show you intimidation. 890 01:06:49,746 --> 01:06:52,579 I'll be back in a few days. 891 01:06:52,749 --> 01:06:54,910 Be good. 892 01:07:04,094 --> 01:07:07,427 - You get a good night's sleep. - Don't think about football. 893 01:07:07,598 --> 01:07:10,158 I won't, Daddy. 894 01:07:16,006 --> 01:07:18,099 Three. 895 01:07:19,109 --> 01:07:21,509 Four. 896 01:07:22,112 --> 01:07:24,512 Five. 897 01:07:25,015 --> 01:07:27,347 Six. 898 01:07:27,851 --> 01:07:30,786 Seven. Eight. 899 01:07:37,527 --> 01:07:40,724 I want to pump you up. 900 01:08:10,494 --> 01:08:16,899 Good night, Urbania. And a special good luck to all tomorrow's players. 901 01:08:46,196 --> 01:08:48,255 Well, hello again, everybody. 902 01:08:48,432 --> 01:08:51,868 This is Cliff Parson, your play-by-play announcer. 903 01:08:52,035 --> 01:08:54,868 What a day it is. We're at Kevin O'Shea Stadium... 904 01:08:55,038 --> 01:08:57,233 ...located in pastoral Urbania, Ohio... 905 01:08:57,407 --> 01:09:00,467 ...scene of what's become known as "Mania in Urbania." 906 01:09:01,912 --> 01:09:04,039 Yeah, let's go. 907 01:09:06,283 --> 01:09:08,581 Now shake it up. 908 01:09:09,119 --> 01:09:11,883 Guys, quiet down! Hold it. 909 01:09:12,055 --> 01:09:15,957 Father Kelly is kind enough to say a prayer for our victory today. 910 01:09:16,126 --> 01:09:17,218 Yeah! 911 01:09:17,394 --> 01:09:18,554 Pipe down! 912 01:09:18,729 --> 01:09:21,664 All right. Quiet down for chrissake! 913 01:09:22,966 --> 01:09:24,729 Hey, shut up! 914 01:09:27,237 --> 01:09:29,068 Go ahead, Father. 915 01:09:29,239 --> 01:09:35,303 As we are about to embark on this journey of athletic competition... 916 01:09:35,479 --> 01:09:38,971 ...we pause to reflect. It is not whether you win or lose... 917 01:09:39,149 --> 01:09:41,481 Giants! Giants! Giants! 918 01:09:41,651 --> 01:09:42,675 What the hell? 919 01:09:42,853 --> 01:09:46,448 Giants! Giants! Giants! Giants! 920 01:09:46,623 --> 01:09:50,286 Giants! Giants! Giants! Giants! 921 01:09:50,761 --> 01:09:52,661 Let's kill them! Come on! 922 01:09:52,829 --> 01:09:54,126 They don't respect you! 923 01:09:56,333 --> 01:09:59,496 Hey, Briggs, you big snot-ball, I'll eat you for lunch! 924 01:10:02,439 --> 01:10:05,272 All right. All right. All right. Guys, cool it. 925 01:10:05,442 --> 01:10:09,276 One sec, coach. Paging Spike the putz! 926 01:10:09,446 --> 01:10:11,937 Hey, hey! Hang on, son. What's the matter? 927 01:10:12,115 --> 01:10:15,482 That's right, Spike! Icebox is gonna defrost you! 928 01:10:15,652 --> 01:10:17,950 You're getting fired up? 929 01:10:18,121 --> 01:10:19,850 Yeah, there you go, son. 930 01:10:20,023 --> 01:10:22,992 Save that rage! Uncork it on the first person you hit. 931 01:10:24,494 --> 01:10:27,292 All right. All right. All right. Enough of that. 932 01:10:27,464 --> 01:10:30,024 - Relax, coach. - We're unstoppable! 933 01:10:30,200 --> 01:10:31,724 Yeah! 934 01:10:32,636 --> 01:10:33,728 Hi, guys. 935 01:10:35,872 --> 01:10:37,464 Becky? 936 01:10:37,641 --> 01:10:41,543 Look, I just came by to wish you good luck and have a great game. 937 01:10:42,145 --> 01:10:44,477 I'll be rooting for you. 938 01:10:49,052 --> 01:10:51,247 All right. Everything's gonna be okay. 939 01:10:51,421 --> 01:10:53,514 - Let's talk strategy, guys. - Strategy? 940 01:10:53,690 --> 01:10:56,318 Without Becky, we're gonna be Cream of Wheat. 941 01:10:56,493 --> 01:11:00,657 Without Icebox, Spike's gonna rip off my face and wear it on Halloween. 942 01:11:00,831 --> 01:11:04,733 I'm leaving the country. I'm going to New Mexico. 943 01:11:05,569 --> 01:11:07,833 Guys, wait. I got something to show you. 944 01:11:08,004 --> 01:11:09,266 - What? - What is it? 945 01:11:13,844 --> 01:11:15,175 Death shrouds. 946 01:11:16,847 --> 01:11:18,371 Your name's on the back. 947 01:11:18,548 --> 01:11:23,679 So the guys at the morgue can identify the bodies. 948 01:11:36,700 --> 01:11:40,932 Hold up! Gentlemen... 949 01:11:41,771 --> 01:11:43,534 ...this ain't just a football. 950 01:11:43,707 --> 01:11:45,038 It's our lives! 951 01:11:45,208 --> 01:11:47,233 Show them what we have! 952 01:11:47,444 --> 01:11:50,607 Here come the Cowboys! 953 01:11:53,884 --> 01:11:56,409 Let's go, guys. Come on. 954 01:11:56,586 --> 01:11:59,077 Okay? Here we go. All right! 955 01:12:11,902 --> 01:12:15,565 Okay. Remember, guys, this is just a football... 956 01:12:15,739 --> 01:12:17,673 ...just air and pig intestines. 957 01:12:19,342 --> 01:12:21,572 All right. Come on. Let's get out there. 958 01:12:35,425 --> 01:12:38,292 I can't see with this thing on! 959 01:12:44,734 --> 01:12:46,998 Is this on? Is this...? 960 01:12:47,170 --> 01:12:49,661 Great to see you, folks. Welcome to the park. 961 01:12:49,839 --> 01:12:54,867 Today, Kevin's peewee Cowboys are gonna test their mini-muscles... 962 01:12:55,045 --> 01:12:57,138 ... against Danny's Little Giants. 963 01:12:57,314 --> 01:12:58,906 Little Giants, nice touch. 964 01:12:59,082 --> 01:13:00,947 - I thought you'd like that. - Guys. 965 01:13:01,117 --> 01:13:02,243 Kevin, you call it. 966 01:13:02,419 --> 01:13:05,081 - Heads. - Excuse me. How come he gets to call it? 967 01:13:05,255 --> 01:13:08,850 What's the difference? You kick off, we ram it down your throat. 968 01:13:09,025 --> 01:13:12,483 We kick off, take it from you, then ram it down your throat. 969 01:13:12,662 --> 01:13:16,120 You've been bossing me around since we were kids. Stop it. 970 01:13:16,299 --> 01:13:18,733 You don't ask for things. You take them. 971 01:13:18,902 --> 01:13:21,496 Like you took my ticket to that World Series? 972 01:13:21,671 --> 01:13:23,866 Guys, cut it out. You're brothers. 973 01:13:24,040 --> 01:13:26,804 - Not by choice. - I don't have to take that... 974 01:13:26,977 --> 01:13:30,469 ...from a guy who sunk his last dime into a broken gas station. 975 01:13:30,647 --> 01:13:34,174 It's been servicing this community for over 40 years. 976 01:13:34,351 --> 01:13:37,218 - It's a landmark. - Ought to be a landfill. 977 01:13:37,387 --> 01:13:40,550 You don't know anything about loyalty or heart. 978 01:13:40,724 --> 01:13:44,490 I would put that gas station up against any business in this town. 979 01:13:44,661 --> 01:13:45,992 - You sure? - Yes, I am. 980 01:13:46,162 --> 01:13:48,562 - Okay, fine. - Okay, fine. 981 01:13:48,732 --> 01:13:50,256 What are we talking about? 982 01:13:50,734 --> 01:13:55,068 My car dealership against your gas station, winner of this game takes it all. 983 01:13:55,238 --> 01:13:56,728 - You're on. - Fine. 984 01:13:56,906 --> 01:14:00,069 I'll even let you call it. Open up your fist. 985 01:14:00,243 --> 01:14:02,734 - Heads. - Tails. 986 01:14:02,912 --> 01:14:07,212 - This will be the longest day of your life. - We'll see about that. 987 01:14:07,751 --> 01:14:08,843 What am I doing? 988 01:14:09,019 --> 01:14:12,182 Cowboys! Cowboys! Win, win, win! 989 01:14:12,355 --> 01:14:15,950 - Giants! Giants! - Help us, God! 990 01:14:18,728 --> 01:14:20,696 Let's make something happen. 991 01:14:23,733 --> 01:14:28,261 Giants kicking off. They'll defend the western goal to my right, your left. 992 01:14:51,094 --> 01:14:52,083 Go! 993 01:14:52,262 --> 01:14:55,720 All right, guys. All right. Kicking is the key to this game. 994 01:15:02,238 --> 01:15:05,799 Somebody's holding a pound of Aunt Betty's nut butter. It's a live ball! 995 01:15:05,975 --> 01:15:08,068 Cowboys recover. 996 01:15:16,786 --> 01:15:18,754 That was easy. 997 01:15:21,124 --> 01:15:23,024 l-formation right, 32 dive on go. 998 01:15:23,193 --> 01:15:24,922 Ready. Break! 999 01:15:25,095 --> 01:15:27,086 When I get finished with you... 1000 01:15:27,263 --> 01:15:30,198 ...you'll fart out your mouth and talk out your butt. 1001 01:15:30,600 --> 01:15:32,261 Is that physically possible? 1002 01:15:32,435 --> 01:15:33,493 Down! 1003 01:15:34,604 --> 01:15:35,662 Set! 1004 01:15:35,839 --> 01:15:37,033 Go! 1005 01:15:42,779 --> 01:15:45,873 - All right. All right. - That's my boy! 1006 01:15:49,352 --> 01:15:50,819 Are you all right? 1007 01:15:51,020 --> 01:15:52,044 I think so. 1008 01:15:52,355 --> 01:15:54,983 I guess it is possible. 1009 01:15:55,158 --> 01:15:56,853 Go! 1010 01:16:05,769 --> 01:16:08,101 Way to hold him. 1011 01:16:14,144 --> 01:16:16,305 Dead meat. 1012 01:16:17,947 --> 01:16:19,209 Go! 1013 01:16:26,489 --> 01:16:28,252 Stay with him. Come on. 1014 01:16:35,398 --> 01:16:38,231 Touchdown, Cowboys! 1015 01:16:41,704 --> 01:16:44,867 This isn't American Gladiators. That was a cheap shot. 1016 01:16:45,074 --> 01:16:46,905 No penalty. No penalty. 1017 01:16:51,114 --> 01:16:55,278 Did I pass the spelling test, Mrs. Greely? 1018 01:16:55,652 --> 01:17:00,282 Wow. Spike knocked him all the way back to second grade. 1019 01:17:11,267 --> 01:17:14,498 - Okay, three little pigs on go. Ready. - Wait. 1020 01:17:14,671 --> 01:17:17,868 - What's the three little pigs? - Here. 1021 01:17:18,041 --> 01:17:23,138 Look. We're lined up strong left. Zolteck, watch Murphy coming through the hole. 1022 01:17:23,479 --> 01:17:25,743 - Ready. - Break! 1023 01:17:30,687 --> 01:17:32,917 Down! 1024 01:17:33,089 --> 01:17:36,115 Set! Go! 1025 01:17:38,995 --> 01:17:41,930 Blow the whistle! Blow the whistle! 1026 01:17:42,098 --> 01:17:46,262 Blow the whistle! Come on. Blow it! Blow it! 1027 01:17:46,970 --> 01:17:49,837 Tad, you're going the wrong way. 1028 01:17:50,073 --> 01:17:53,236 Blow the whistle! Come on! Blow the whistle! Blow it. 1029 01:17:53,409 --> 01:17:54,967 Blow it! 1030 01:17:58,548 --> 01:17:59,674 All right. 1031 01:17:59,949 --> 01:18:01,576 Down! 1032 01:18:02,185 --> 01:18:04,915 Set! Hut! 1033 01:18:19,102 --> 01:18:22,128 I should have gone to summer school. 1034 01:18:47,630 --> 01:18:50,565 Okay. Hanon, I want you to run a bear trap curl... 1035 01:18:50,733 --> 01:18:53,702 ...and try to catch the ball. - No problem. 1036 01:18:53,870 --> 01:18:57,670 - Okay, guys. On two. Ready. - Break! 1037 01:19:05,982 --> 01:19:07,643 Down! 1038 01:19:08,918 --> 01:19:12,410 Set! Go! Go! Go! 1039 01:19:25,702 --> 01:19:28,865 Hey, Hot Hands. You're the best player on our team. 1040 01:19:32,241 --> 01:19:34,368 - Ready. - Break! 1041 01:19:35,712 --> 01:19:37,077 Gonna rip your head off. 1042 01:19:39,315 --> 01:19:40,976 Down! 1043 01:19:42,118 --> 01:19:43,608 Set! 1044 01:19:44,120 --> 01:19:46,520 Go! Go! Go! Go! 1045 01:19:50,360 --> 01:19:56,026 Hammersmith dives on the ball in the end zone. Touchdown, Cowboys! 1046 01:19:56,666 --> 01:19:59,260 I can't see with this thing on! 1047 01:19:59,435 --> 01:20:04,236 That's the end of your first half. The score: Cowboys 21, Giants nothing. 1048 01:20:04,407 --> 01:20:08,571 - I'm not finished with you, Zol-fart. - Have a nice halftime, girls. 1049 01:20:08,745 --> 01:20:11,942 Look at my back. Is my spine sticking out through my uniform? 1050 01:20:12,281 --> 01:20:16,149 - It's hard to tell. - I've lost feeling in the back of my leg. 1051 01:20:16,319 --> 01:20:18,378 - Maybe it's asleep. - Nobody wake it. 1052 01:20:18,554 --> 01:20:22,957 - Hanon, call 911. - I can't. My fingers are stuck together. 1053 01:20:23,159 --> 01:20:27,562 Hey, Danny, this thing's gone far enough. Let's call it off, huh? 1054 01:20:27,730 --> 01:20:30,290 - It's not over. - It's not over. You're sure? 1055 01:20:30,466 --> 01:20:31,763 It's halftime. 1056 01:20:31,934 --> 01:20:36,837 Okay, kid. Hey, there'll always be a job for you at the full-service pumps. 1057 01:20:49,385 --> 01:20:51,819 Okay, guys. Listen up. We still got a shot. 1058 01:20:51,988 --> 01:20:54,650 A couple things go differently for us, we're in it. 1059 01:20:55,158 --> 01:20:57,922 - We can do it. - We really creamed them by showing up. 1060 01:20:58,094 --> 01:21:02,121 We quit. So call us if you decide to coach softball. 1061 01:21:02,698 --> 01:21:06,099 - What about the second half? - Tell them we can't come out. 1062 01:21:08,004 --> 01:21:11,565 - Put us on the injured list. - Yeah. 1063 01:21:24,487 --> 01:21:28,321 You know, there's something you guys should know. 1064 01:21:28,491 --> 01:21:32,393 When I was 10 years old, I put myself on the injured list. 1065 01:21:34,597 --> 01:21:38,055 - I never got off. - Why? 1066 01:21:38,234 --> 01:21:42,796 Because I didn't get picked a few times. So I started hiding under the bleachers. 1067 01:21:43,106 --> 01:21:45,574 That's where we belong, under the bleachers. 1068 01:21:45,741 --> 01:21:47,140 No, you don't. 1069 01:21:47,310 --> 01:21:49,904 You guys belong out there with those Cowboys. 1070 01:21:50,079 --> 01:21:53,742 You know how I know that? Because I belong out there with my brother. 1071 01:21:53,916 --> 01:21:57,249 Give us a break. You couldn't beat Kevin O'Shea at anything. 1072 01:21:57,420 --> 01:22:01,379 - No, that's not true. I did beat him once. - When? 1073 01:22:02,191 --> 01:22:06,525 When we were kids. We used to race our bikes down Cherry Hill after school. 1074 01:22:06,696 --> 01:22:09,290 We'd race every day, and he always beat me. 1075 01:22:09,465 --> 01:22:13,060 But one time, one time, I beat him. 1076 01:22:13,269 --> 01:22:18,229 - You beat Kevin down Cherry Hill? - Yes, I did. He ate my dust. 1077 01:22:18,674 --> 01:22:21,768 - Big deal. One time. - You know... 1078 01:22:21,944 --> 01:22:26,438 ...one time, at Randy Cooper's swim party, I did a back flip off the high dive. 1079 01:22:26,616 --> 01:22:31,553 - And my brother chickened out. - Roger chickened out? He's a Marine. 1080 01:22:31,721 --> 01:22:34,713 Oh, that's nothing. One time, at a Spring Carnival... 1081 01:22:34,891 --> 01:22:37,553 ...I beat both my brothers in the cow-dung toss. 1082 01:22:37,727 --> 01:22:40,457 You beat Matt and Brad in the turd toss? 1083 01:22:40,696 --> 01:22:43,290 One time, I went fishing with my entire family. 1084 01:22:43,466 --> 01:22:45,991 I was the only one that didn't throw up. 1085 01:22:46,169 --> 01:22:49,138 So what? That doesn't make us good football players. 1086 01:22:49,438 --> 01:22:53,272 Wait a second, guys. Who said you had to be good to play football? 1087 01:22:53,442 --> 01:22:55,637 You play football because you want to. 1088 01:22:55,945 --> 01:22:57,742 You play because it's fun. 1089 01:22:57,947 --> 01:23:00,939 You play so you can pretend you're Joe Montana... 1090 01:23:01,117 --> 01:23:05,076 ...throwing a touchdown pass or Emmitt Smith going for a long run. 1091 01:23:05,254 --> 01:23:08,246 And even if those Cowboys are better than you guys... 1092 01:23:08,424 --> 01:23:12,292 ...even if they beat you 99 times out of 100... 1093 01:23:12,461 --> 01:23:15,157 ...that still leaves... - One time. 1094 01:23:15,531 --> 01:23:19,695 - One time. - Yeah. One time. 1095 01:23:22,838 --> 01:23:27,138 - Stop! Who are we? - Giants! 1096 01:23:34,250 --> 01:23:38,311 - I just told the mayor you forfeited. - You give the mayor a message for me. 1097 01:23:38,487 --> 01:23:40,751 Tell him not to bet on the Cowboys. 1098 01:23:40,923 --> 01:23:42,185 - You forget one thing. - What? 1099 01:23:42,358 --> 01:23:46,192 - That's my field. - Yeah, well, we got the ball. 1100 01:23:47,496 --> 01:23:49,862 Come on. All right. 1101 01:23:59,742 --> 01:24:02,074 Okay, guys. All right. Here we go. 1102 01:24:02,278 --> 01:24:04,644 - Go, Spike. - All right. Let's hit somebody. 1103 01:24:04,814 --> 01:24:06,748 Break! 1104 01:24:09,051 --> 01:24:11,611 They're gonna have to put you in a body bag. 1105 01:24:12,021 --> 01:24:15,513 - Prepare to eat grass. - Pig breath, you're in big trouble. 1106 01:24:15,725 --> 01:24:20,890 - How come? - Football's 80%% mental and 40%% physical. 1107 01:24:21,063 --> 01:24:22,690 - Set. Go! - What? 1108 01:24:33,542 --> 01:24:35,567 Hey, guys, look! 1109 01:24:36,712 --> 01:24:39,840 - Second and nine. - They gained a yard! 1110 01:24:42,385 --> 01:24:44,546 We got one yard. 1111 01:24:47,590 --> 01:24:49,251 One yard. 1112 01:24:49,659 --> 01:24:51,217 Don't mean nothing. 1113 01:24:51,627 --> 01:24:53,356 Down! 1114 01:24:53,529 --> 01:24:55,929 Set! Go! 1115 01:25:01,337 --> 01:25:05,034 Flea-flicker to Floyd. He's got room up the sideline, the 45, the 50. 1116 01:25:10,946 --> 01:25:14,905 First down, Giants, on their longest gain of the afternoon. 1117 01:25:15,117 --> 01:25:17,176 What kind of defense is that? Come on. 1118 01:25:17,353 --> 01:25:19,344 All right. Great. Great stuff. 1119 01:25:19,522 --> 01:25:24,084 Giants, Giants, first and 10 Giants, Giants 1120 01:25:24,360 --> 01:25:28,057 Okay, listen up. What would be the last thing they'd expect us to do? 1121 01:25:28,931 --> 01:25:33,061 - A reverse to me? - Down! 1122 01:25:33,602 --> 01:25:36,901 Set! Go! 1123 01:25:39,141 --> 01:25:41,473 I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die. 1124 01:25:41,644 --> 01:25:44,112 - Come on, Tad! - I'm gonna die! 1125 01:25:44,280 --> 01:25:46,771 Tad! Go! Go! Run out of bounds! 1126 01:25:51,887 --> 01:25:53,411 Tad! Run! 1127 01:26:02,631 --> 01:26:04,496 Go! Go! 1128 01:26:06,569 --> 01:26:08,969 We scored! We scored a touchdown! 1129 01:26:09,171 --> 01:26:11,605 Touchdown, Giants! 1130 01:26:13,843 --> 01:26:16,607 Oh, my God! My son scored a touchdown. 1131 01:26:42,405 --> 01:26:46,432 Down. Set. Go! 1132 01:26:57,019 --> 01:26:59,954 Yes. I've done it. 1133 01:27:14,570 --> 01:27:17,334 All right, Spike. We're not taking any chances. 1134 01:27:17,506 --> 01:27:21,840 Either take Junior Floyd out of the game or you donate a kidney to Aunt Ruth. 1135 01:27:22,011 --> 01:27:24,912 - Yes, sir! - Okay. Come on. Get going. 1136 01:27:43,265 --> 01:27:47,827 - Personal foul, number 32, white. - Are you crazy? What kind of call is that? 1137 01:27:48,003 --> 01:27:51,734 Hey. That wasn't very nice, you big bully. 1138 01:27:51,907 --> 01:27:56,241 If that kid of yours pulls another stunt like that, you're both out of here. 1139 01:27:56,412 --> 01:28:01,042 - Hey, I thought you wanted to win. - Not like that. 1140 01:28:30,713 --> 01:28:33,147 - Hi. - Sure you want to do this, Becky? 1141 01:28:33,315 --> 01:28:36,250 - Call me Icebox. - Hey, Icebox. 1142 01:28:36,418 --> 01:28:38,215 Kick some butt. 1143 01:28:40,456 --> 01:28:41,946 Call me Becky. 1144 01:28:51,600 --> 01:28:55,297 - What's that cheerleader doing? - It's no cheerleader. That's my niece. 1145 01:28:55,471 --> 01:28:56,768 And she's pissed. 1146 01:28:56,939 --> 01:28:58,463 Break! 1147 01:29:00,910 --> 01:29:04,778 Keep clear, Ice Chest, or I'll have to mess up your face. 1148 01:29:06,682 --> 01:29:10,641 Two, fifty-six. Two, fifty-six. 1149 01:29:10,819 --> 01:29:14,186 Two, fifty-six. Down! 1150 01:29:14,456 --> 01:29:17,425 Set! Go! 1151 01:29:28,270 --> 01:29:33,105 What a hit by Becky O'Shea. The ball is loose. Hanon tightly covers it up. 1152 01:29:33,309 --> 01:29:35,834 Yes! All right! That's my girl! 1153 01:29:36,011 --> 01:29:37,842 Yeah. 1154 01:29:38,013 --> 01:29:39,503 No! 1155 01:29:42,384 --> 01:29:44,113 - Let it go, man. - Get away. 1156 01:29:44,920 --> 01:29:48,356 I got it! I got it! I got it! 1157 01:29:58,400 --> 01:30:00,493 Zolteck! Come here. 1158 01:30:01,003 --> 01:30:06,600 - You rang? - Chicken little flea-flicker on two. Take it. 1159 01:30:08,410 --> 01:30:12,141 - Okay. Chicken little flea-flicker on two. - What's that? 1160 01:30:12,414 --> 01:30:13,813 It's a pitch to Johnny. 1161 01:30:14,316 --> 01:30:18,719 Pitch to Johnny? You can't pitch to Johnny. I'm Johnny! 1162 01:30:18,887 --> 01:30:21,481 Zolteck, he's gonna need some running room. 1163 01:30:21,790 --> 01:30:23,155 Got you. 1164 01:30:23,325 --> 01:30:26,761 - Break! - Excuse me, guys! Guys, come on! 1165 01:30:28,430 --> 01:30:33,527 Excuse me. Maybe you can help me. I'm trying to remember what I had for lunch. 1166 01:30:33,769 --> 01:30:37,432 - How can we do that? - By taking a whiff of this. 1167 01:30:39,675 --> 01:30:41,233 Hut. Hut two. 1168 01:30:43,379 --> 01:30:46,610 - Now what? - Just run to him. 1169 01:30:48,050 --> 01:30:49,915 Dad? 1170 01:30:50,486 --> 01:30:52,579 Dad! 1171 01:30:52,755 --> 01:30:54,017 Dad! 1172 01:31:00,229 --> 01:31:02,060 Dad! 1173 01:31:03,198 --> 01:31:05,325 Dad! 1174 01:31:08,971 --> 01:31:10,268 Dad! 1175 01:31:11,173 --> 01:31:14,301 Touchdown! The Giants deficit is cut in half... 1176 01:31:14,476 --> 01:31:17,070 ...on brilliant running by Johnny Vennaro. 1177 01:31:19,715 --> 01:31:24,277 - Line up. Let's go. Get the guys over here. - We're out there. Let's go to kick off. 1178 01:31:26,889 --> 01:31:28,447 Down! 1179 01:31:28,624 --> 01:31:31,616 Set! Go! 1180 01:31:38,100 --> 01:31:42,127 - Clear it out. Let's go. - All right, guys. Way to go. 1181 01:31:42,304 --> 01:31:44,602 What's the matter, four-eyes? 1182 01:31:44,773 --> 01:31:46,934 Want your mama? 1183 01:31:47,609 --> 01:31:49,941 Don't be talking about my mama. 1184 01:31:51,180 --> 01:31:55,173 Watching Jake play football has really been great for my family. 1185 01:31:55,350 --> 01:31:56,408 Yeah. 1186 01:31:56,585 --> 01:31:59,452 Down. Set. Go! 1187 01:32:04,727 --> 01:32:08,163 Rip their filthy ears off, Jakester! 1188 01:32:10,299 --> 01:32:12,563 Yes! Yes! 1189 01:32:19,475 --> 01:32:24,276 - I use these for acid indigestion. - So what are we gonna use these for? 1190 01:32:24,446 --> 01:32:26,141 Intimidation. 1191 01:32:29,118 --> 01:32:30,608 Break! 1192 01:32:42,965 --> 01:32:44,694 Go. 1193 01:32:47,970 --> 01:32:51,064 What's the matter with you? You gonna play or what? 1194 01:32:51,573 --> 01:32:55,703 Okay. I've got the play. Silver streak to Hanon on two. 1195 01:32:55,878 --> 01:32:57,140 Are you sure? 1196 01:32:57,312 --> 01:32:59,644 - Ready. - Break! 1197 01:33:00,783 --> 01:33:03,274 - Oh, crud. - Come on. 1198 01:33:04,219 --> 01:33:06,346 Set! Go! 1199 01:33:10,893 --> 01:33:12,918 Pass! Pass! Pass! 1200 01:33:26,742 --> 01:33:28,369 Yeah! That's my boy! 1201 01:33:36,285 --> 01:33:38,014 All right, Hanon! 1202 01:33:38,187 --> 01:33:39,449 Touchdown! 1203 01:33:39,621 --> 01:33:41,919 - Wrong defense! - I didn't call the blitz! 1204 01:33:46,929 --> 01:33:49,796 With 1:45 left and the score tied 21 to 21... 1205 01:33:49,965 --> 01:33:53,958 ...it looks like Mr. Momentum may be changing his address. 1206 01:33:54,136 --> 01:33:55,467 All right, men. Let's go. 1207 01:33:56,805 --> 01:33:58,602 Down! 1208 01:33:58,941 --> 01:34:00,602 Set! 1209 01:34:01,109 --> 01:34:02,906 Go! 1210 01:34:08,550 --> 01:34:11,383 - Get off of me. - You're mine. 1211 01:34:13,555 --> 01:34:15,682 All right. All right. 1212 01:34:18,260 --> 01:34:22,526 With less than a minute to play, the Cowboys are heading for that end zone. 1213 01:34:22,698 --> 01:34:24,461 Set! Go! 1214 01:34:30,272 --> 01:34:32,103 Stick a fork in them. They're done! 1215 01:34:34,209 --> 01:34:36,404 Easy! Easy! One more! 1216 01:34:36,745 --> 01:34:37,905 Come here, son. 1217 01:34:38,080 --> 01:34:41,675 Thirty-eight toss. You understand? Thirty-eight toss. Let's go. 1218 01:34:44,887 --> 01:34:47,856 Do you remember that championship game with Sutterville? 1219 01:34:48,023 --> 01:34:51,117 The one where Kevin scored the winning touchdown? 1220 01:34:52,261 --> 01:34:53,523 Time-out. 1221 01:34:53,695 --> 01:34:58,132 The Giants call a time-out with 10 seconds left and the ball on the one-yard line. 1222 01:34:58,834 --> 01:35:00,825 Come on, guys. Huddle up. 1223 01:35:01,003 --> 01:35:04,530 Look, no one thought we'd make it this far. 1224 01:35:04,706 --> 01:35:08,699 But now it's time to really dig in. They're gonna give the ball to Spike. 1225 01:35:08,877 --> 01:35:11,778 - We've gotta stop him. - He's too strong. 1226 01:35:11,947 --> 01:35:14,313 We can do it together. 1227 01:35:15,984 --> 01:35:18,509 - Ready. - Break! 1228 01:35:19,321 --> 01:35:23,121 Hold that line! Hold that line! Hold that line! 1229 01:35:24,593 --> 01:35:26,026 Set! 1230 01:35:28,664 --> 01:35:30,222 They know the play. 1231 01:35:30,399 --> 01:35:32,492 They know the play. 1232 01:35:35,570 --> 01:35:37,970 Set! 1233 01:35:38,206 --> 01:35:40,231 Go! 1234 01:36:08,971 --> 01:36:10,962 Turn it up! 1235 01:36:17,112 --> 01:36:19,512 - Yes! We're in! Touchdown! - Yeah! 1236 01:36:19,681 --> 01:36:21,444 - It was over! - No. We stopped him. 1237 01:36:21,616 --> 01:36:23,174 - He was in. - No way. 1238 01:36:23,485 --> 01:36:25,749 Move it back. Everybody, off the ball. 1239 01:36:25,921 --> 01:36:27,582 Move back. 1240 01:36:28,090 --> 01:36:29,284 Giants' ball! 1241 01:36:29,891 --> 01:36:31,552 No! No! 1242 01:36:31,727 --> 01:36:33,752 Giants' ball! 1243 01:36:33,929 --> 01:36:35,396 Told you. 1244 01:36:35,564 --> 01:36:37,429 Time-out. 1245 01:36:41,803 --> 01:36:44,897 You did it, guys. You stopped him. I'm real proud of you. 1246 01:36:45,073 --> 01:36:48,941 - Coach, there's still four seconds left. - We can beat these guys. 1247 01:36:51,113 --> 01:36:53,843 Put me in, coach! I wanna kick some butt! 1248 01:36:54,016 --> 01:36:56,314 What kind of play you got for this? 1249 01:36:56,718 --> 01:36:59,380 How about the annexation of Puerto Rico? 1250 01:36:59,554 --> 01:37:03,923 With four seconds left, the Giants trot onto the field for the final play. 1251 01:37:07,095 --> 01:37:09,757 - Ready. - One time. 1252 01:37:12,634 --> 01:37:14,397 - Ready. - Break! 1253 01:37:15,637 --> 01:37:17,969 You're mine, pom-pom. 1254 01:37:19,474 --> 01:37:22,500 - All right. - Let's go, baby. One more play, baby. 1255 01:37:22,677 --> 01:37:24,872 Watch the wingman. 1256 01:37:30,619 --> 01:37:32,246 Down! 1257 01:37:32,421 --> 01:37:34,981 - Don't let anybody behind you! - Set! 1258 01:37:39,795 --> 01:37:41,558 Go! 1259 01:37:46,001 --> 01:37:48,765 Reverse! Reverse! 1260 01:37:52,040 --> 01:37:55,476 She doesn't have the ball. Fumblerooski! Fumblerooski! 1261 01:37:58,947 --> 01:38:03,213 - Yeah! No mercy! - No ball. 1262 01:38:08,557 --> 01:38:10,855 - Get him! - He's got the ball! 1263 01:38:23,505 --> 01:38:26,133 I got it. I got it. 1264 01:38:26,308 --> 01:38:27,866 Come on! Come on! 1265 01:38:28,343 --> 01:38:31,744 I'm gonna score a touchdown. I'm gonna score a touchdown! 1266 01:38:31,913 --> 01:38:33,881 No, you're not. 1267 01:38:39,588 --> 01:38:40,816 Yeah! 1268 01:38:44,159 --> 01:38:47,060 - We won! - We won! 1269 01:39:07,082 --> 01:39:08,947 We did it! We won! 1270 01:39:09,484 --> 01:39:12,715 - We won! We won! We won! - We did it! 1271 01:39:12,888 --> 01:39:14,617 We won! 1272 01:39:15,724 --> 01:39:18,784 We won! We won! 1273 01:39:19,794 --> 01:39:21,022 We won! 1274 01:39:24,432 --> 01:39:26,491 Patty Floyd... 1275 01:39:27,135 --> 01:39:30,901 ...I was wondering if you'd be interested in having dinner with me? 1276 01:39:34,809 --> 01:39:37,403 Fine, if you'd like to think about it. 1277 01:39:40,382 --> 01:39:42,475 Get a grip, Dad. 1278 01:39:44,719 --> 01:39:47,449 Yeah! Oh, yeah! 1279 01:39:48,223 --> 01:39:49,656 Yes! 1280 01:39:52,861 --> 01:39:57,764 Giants! Giants! Giants! Giants! 1281 01:39:58,800 --> 01:40:01,997 Congratulations, Danny. Looks like you're the new head coach. 1282 01:40:02,170 --> 01:40:05,435 If you're pissed at me, don't be. If I wasn't tough on you... 1283 01:40:05,607 --> 01:40:08,542 ...when we were kids, you never would've beat me today. 1284 01:40:08,710 --> 01:40:13,477 - Okay. Listen, Kev, my guys are wondering... - They want to tar and feather me in public? 1285 01:40:13,715 --> 01:40:17,583 No. They're wondering if your team wants to join the Little Giants. 1286 01:40:17,752 --> 01:40:19,982 One town. One team. 1287 01:40:20,956 --> 01:40:23,481 - All right. I'll tell my boys. - Hey, Kev. 1288 01:40:23,658 --> 01:40:26,855 - Is it possible to have two head coaches? - No. 1289 01:40:27,028 --> 01:40:31,260 In case the head coach doesn't know as much about football as the other coach? 1290 01:40:36,671 --> 01:40:38,901 Let me think about it. All right? 1291 01:40:39,074 --> 01:40:41,668 - Deal. - Danny. 1292 01:40:42,277 --> 01:40:44,711 That bet we made, you're not holding me to it? 1293 01:40:45,280 --> 01:40:50,308 Kevin, am I the kind of guy that's gonna throw his own brother out on the street? 1294 01:40:50,619 --> 01:40:52,814 - No. - There's always a job for you... 1295 01:40:52,988 --> 01:40:56,321 ...at Danny O'Shea Chevrolet. I'll start you on commission... 1296 01:40:56,491 --> 01:41:01,121 Danny, look, there's gotta be some way we can work this out. What do you want? 1297 01:41:01,296 --> 01:41:04,493 Well, there is one thing. 1298 01:41:04,666 --> 01:41:06,190 What? 1299 01:45:52,220 --> 01:45:53,209 [ENGLISH] 99639