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1
00:00:04,104 --> 00:00:05,871
Man, this blizzard
is crazy.
2
00:00:05,939 --> 00:00:07,539
The snow is up to my--
3
00:00:07,607 --> 00:00:10,743
Ugly skirt,
ugly jacket, ugly hat?
4
00:00:10,810 --> 00:00:13,045
Ugh! I need a vacation.
5
00:00:13,113 --> 00:00:15,314
Well, aren't you
going on one of your family trips?
6
00:00:15,382 --> 00:00:18,350
Yes. We're going
to minnesota--ice-fishing.
7
00:00:18,418 --> 00:00:20,552
Why do you have to
go fish for ice?
8
00:00:20,620 --> 00:00:22,921
Just get it
out of a machine.
9
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:25,924
There's one
on every floor.
10
00:00:25,992 --> 00:00:27,493
[elevator dings]
11
00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:29,495
Mom, it's just
a little snow.
12
00:00:29,562 --> 00:00:31,163
I don't need
a scarf.
13
00:00:31,231 --> 00:00:34,466
I'll take it.
Layers keep you warm.
14
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:38,637
I'm also wearing 6 pairs
of thermal underwear.
15
00:00:39,639 --> 00:00:41,974
Ok, come on. You're
late for school.
16
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:44,143
I'm coming as fast
as I can.
17
00:00:44,210 --> 00:00:48,514
I've got a 6-fold wedgie.
18
00:00:50,150 --> 00:00:52,851
Guys, come on.
I had a late show.
19
00:00:52,919 --> 00:00:55,120
I really just want
to go back to bed.
20
00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:56,688
Man on radio:
Wzpz weather on the fives.
21
00:00:56,756 --> 00:00:59,158
As boston experiences
its worst blizzard in years,
22
00:00:59,225 --> 00:01:00,859
All schools are closed.
23
00:01:00,927 --> 00:01:02,227
Yes!
24
00:01:02,295 --> 00:01:03,896
No!
25
00:01:05,098 --> 00:01:07,066
Race you upstairs!
26
00:01:09,936 --> 00:01:12,938
Huh. That got rid
of the wedgie.
27
00:01:14,274 --> 00:01:16,608
♪ here I am
in your life ♪
28
00:01:16,676 --> 00:01:18,610
♪ here you are in mine ♪
29
00:01:18,678 --> 00:01:21,713
♪ guess we have
a suite life ♪
30
00:01:21,781 --> 00:01:23,682
♪ most of the time ♪
31
00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:25,884
♪ you and me,
we got the world to see ♪
32
00:01:25,952 --> 00:01:28,053
♪ so come on down ♪
33
00:01:28,121 --> 00:01:30,189
♪ just me and you
know what to do ♪
34
00:01:30,256 --> 00:01:32,825
♪ so come on down ♪
35
00:01:32,892 --> 00:01:35,027
♪ it's you and me
and me and you ♪
36
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:37,563
♪ we got the whole place
to ourselves ♪
37
00:01:37,630 --> 00:01:40,032
♪ you and me, we got it
all for free ♪
38
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,501
♪ so come on down ♪
39
00:01:42,569 --> 00:01:44,937
♪ this is the suite life ♪
40
00:01:46,573 --> 00:01:50,476
♪ we've got a suite life ♪
41
00:02:00,487 --> 00:02:05,657
Ouch. The dreaded
shampoo-conditioner split.
42
00:02:05,725 --> 00:02:06,925
I'm bored.
43
00:02:06,993 --> 00:02:08,026
That's because
you're losing...
44
00:02:08,094 --> 00:02:09,761
And you're boring.
45
00:02:09,829 --> 00:02:13,031
Now, go get
the bowling tissue.
46
00:02:13,933 --> 00:02:15,567
Man: I can't
do this anymore.
47
00:02:15,635 --> 00:02:17,569
I'm sick of it,
I tell you. Sick!
48
00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:19,071
Second man: Come on.
One more hit,
49
00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,973
And we're out
of this dirty business.
50
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:23,842
Zach, come here.
Listen.
51
00:02:23,910 --> 00:02:26,245
First man: We wouldn't
be in this mess
52
00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:27,846
If you hadn't
killed marla.
53
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:29,481
Second man:
Don't pin that on me.
54
00:02:29,549 --> 00:02:31,150
We both had
a hand in that.
55
00:02:31,217 --> 00:02:33,085
Anyway, the decision
came from upstairs.
56
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:34,853
We were just
hired guns.
57
00:02:34,921 --> 00:02:37,289
Did you hear that?
58
00:02:37,357 --> 00:02:39,224
Yeah! They argue
like we do.
59
00:02:39,292 --> 00:02:40,726
Yeah, that's
my point.
60
00:02:40,793 --> 00:02:42,327
They're hit men.
61
00:02:42,395 --> 00:02:43,662
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I know.
62
00:02:43,730 --> 00:02:44,830
We got to
tell somebody.
63
00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:46,465
Tell somebody what?
64
00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:49,334
Nothing. We got nothing
to tell anybody.
65
00:02:49,402 --> 00:02:52,838
Yeah. Why would we
tell somebody nothing?
66
00:02:52,906 --> 00:02:54,706
What's the problem?
67
00:02:54,774 --> 00:02:55,941
[crack]
68
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:59,845
Problem? We don't have
a problem. Right, zack?
69
00:03:00,780 --> 00:03:03,849
Uhh...Bye!
70
00:03:06,286 --> 00:03:09,388
Come on, lou. Let's
get back to work.
71
00:03:09,455 --> 00:03:11,290
Face it, bud.
Our careers have been over
72
00:03:11,357 --> 00:03:13,225
Since the day
they canceled "marla."
73
00:03:13,293 --> 00:03:15,594
We'll never come up
with a new tv show.
74
00:03:15,662 --> 00:03:18,230
Oh, come on.
Sure we will. Hey!
75
00:03:18,298 --> 00:03:20,465
I got it!
"cows in space!"
76
00:03:20,533 --> 00:03:23,769
It'll be "udderly"
hysterical.
77
00:03:23,836 --> 00:03:26,138
It was jokes like that
that killed our careers.
78
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,307
We might as well burn
all our stupid ideas
79
00:03:28,374 --> 00:03:31,176
And go work for my uncle
in the lamp factory.
80
00:03:31,244 --> 00:03:32,778
Yeah. Well, that'll
be a shade better.
81
00:03:32,845 --> 00:03:34,913
Sorry. I just...
I can't turn it off.
82
00:03:34,981 --> 00:03:37,316
I can't
help myself.
83
00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:39,818
Mr. Moseby, you have to
do something quick!
84
00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:43,455
There are a couple
of hit men in 2121!
85
00:03:43,523 --> 00:03:45,324
Ooh. Are they next-door
to the werewolves
86
00:03:45,391 --> 00:03:46,758
You found last weekend?
87
00:03:46,826 --> 00:03:48,427
Ok, you have
to admit,
88
00:03:48,494 --> 00:03:49,995
That guy was
freakishly hairy.
89
00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:53,198
No. No. This time,
it's the real thing.
90
00:03:53,266 --> 00:03:54,666
We heard
their whole conversation
91
00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:58,237
While our ears were accidentally
pressed against their door.
92
00:03:59,472 --> 00:04:00,572
Ah!
93
00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:04,843
Guys, we found
some hit men in the hotel!
94
00:04:04,911 --> 00:04:06,278
Is this anything
like the time
95
00:04:06,346 --> 00:04:08,880
You found an alien
spaceman on the roof?
96
00:04:08,948 --> 00:04:10,782
Hey, no one told us
97
00:04:10,850 --> 00:04:14,720
Moseby hired
a bee exterminator.
98
00:04:14,787 --> 00:04:16,788
I'm telling you,
these guys are killers!
99
00:04:16,856 --> 00:04:18,156
They already offed
someone named marla!
100
00:04:18,224 --> 00:04:20,125
That's them!
101
00:04:20,193 --> 00:04:21,393
Don't look!
102
00:04:21,461 --> 00:04:24,730
They're probably carrying
a body in that duffel bag.
103
00:04:24,797 --> 00:04:27,299
Oh, please. Let's not
jump to any conclusions.
104
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:28,867
Man: Excuse me, miss.
105
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:31,470
Is there somewhere in this hotel
we can dispose of this?
106
00:04:31,537 --> 00:04:32,804
Preferably
a furnace
107
00:04:32,872 --> 00:04:34,506
Where we
can burn it.
108
00:04:35,508 --> 00:04:37,476
Maddie, why don't
you draw them
109
00:04:37,543 --> 00:04:40,178
A detailed map
to the furnace
110
00:04:40,246 --> 00:04:44,082
So they can zip down
there and check it out?
111
00:04:44,150 --> 00:04:45,984
The bag.
112
00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:48,887
Right. Right. Here.
Let me show you guys.
113
00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:51,123
Ok. Um...It's, uh...
114
00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:55,260
Down 2 floors
at the end of the hall.
115
00:04:55,328 --> 00:04:57,362
[zipper opening]
116
00:04:57,430 --> 00:05:00,899
Uh...Sorry.
Barn door was open.
117
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:03,302
What are you doing
with our bag?
118
00:05:03,369 --> 00:05:04,536
Excuse me, sir.
119
00:05:04,604 --> 00:05:06,204
Didn't I tell you
not to disturb the guests?
120
00:05:06,272 --> 00:05:08,173
Mr. Moseby,
you don't understand.
121
00:05:08,241 --> 00:05:10,976
Oh, I understand completely.
You're trying to ruin my career.
122
00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:13,045
That's not true.
We're not trying.
123
00:05:13,112 --> 00:05:15,213
Ooh! Ooh!
124
00:05:15,281 --> 00:05:16,415
Oh!
125
00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:19,017
If it happens,
it happens.
126
00:05:19,085 --> 00:05:22,120
I am sorry, madam.
127
00:05:22,188 --> 00:05:23,522
Oh, there you are.
128
00:05:23,589 --> 00:05:25,757
How about
a free dessert?
129
00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:28,860
Run!
130
00:05:28,928 --> 00:05:30,529
Boys, what is
going on in here?
131
00:05:30,596 --> 00:05:32,931
There's a dead body
in that bag.
132
00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:34,299
Those are your kids?
133
00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:35,734
No.
Are you cops?
134
00:05:35,802 --> 00:05:37,436
Then yes.
135
00:05:37,503 --> 00:05:39,137
The next time
you go on vacation,
136
00:05:39,205 --> 00:05:40,405
You might think about
leaving them at home.
137
00:05:40,473 --> 00:05:42,874
Oh, no. We're not on vacation.
We live here.
138
00:05:42,942 --> 00:05:45,277
Out of my way!
139
00:05:49,882 --> 00:05:52,451
At least we used to.
140
00:05:52,518 --> 00:05:53,785
Zack's telling
the truth.
141
00:05:53,853 --> 00:05:55,153
They're hit men!
142
00:05:55,221 --> 00:05:57,389
We're hit men?
No, we're tv writers.
143
00:05:57,457 --> 00:06:00,292
We haven't had
a hit in years.
144
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:02,027
Ooh! Our mistake.
145
00:06:02,095 --> 00:06:04,029
Look at all this.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
146
00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:06,598
We complain and get one
of those free desserts?
147
00:06:06,666 --> 00:06:07,766
No.
148
00:06:07,834 --> 00:06:09,434
This hotel,
the wacky twins,
149
00:06:09,502 --> 00:06:11,770
The fussy manager,
the cute girls.
150
00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:14,272
This would make
a great tv show.
151
00:06:14,340 --> 00:06:15,407
Yeah. I'd watch it.
152
00:06:15,475 --> 00:06:16,541
Yeah? You're
gonna write it.
153
00:06:16,609 --> 00:06:17,609
Oh! Even better!
154
00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:18,944
Uh-huh.
155
00:06:22,181 --> 00:06:24,783
Have fun on
your vacation, madeleine.
156
00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:26,151
Fun?
157
00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:29,287
It's 20 degrees colder
in minnesota than it is here.
158
00:06:29,355 --> 00:06:33,959
Penguins go there and say,
"wow. It's cold. Let's leave."
159
00:06:34,026 --> 00:06:35,560
They have talking
penguins there,
160
00:06:35,628 --> 00:06:37,496
And you still
don't want to go?
161
00:06:38,564 --> 00:06:40,532
Bye, maddie.
162
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:41,967
Bye.
163
00:06:42,034 --> 00:06:43,301
Bye, maddie.
164
00:06:43,369 --> 00:06:44,302
Bye.
165
00:06:44,370 --> 00:06:46,304
Bye, maddie.
166
00:06:46,372 --> 00:06:48,039
Bye, maddie.
167
00:06:49,475 --> 00:06:52,477
Zach, remember
how we talked about people's personal space?
168
00:06:52,545 --> 00:06:53,812
Yeah.
169
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,715
And I like maddie's
space the best.
170
00:06:56,783 --> 00:06:58,316
There they are!
171
00:06:58,384 --> 00:06:59,651
Great news!
172
00:06:59,719 --> 00:07:02,587
We've sold
zack and cody!
173
00:07:02,655 --> 00:07:04,523
Marvelous! I'll get
some bubble wrap,
174
00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:07,626
And we'll ship them
off immediately!
175
00:07:07,693 --> 00:07:09,694
No, we sold a sitcom
about twin boys
176
00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:12,364
Living in a hotel,
and you're all in it.
177
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:14,232
Oh! We're going
to be stars!
178
00:07:14,300 --> 00:07:15,534
Hooray!
Hooray!
179
00:07:15,601 --> 00:07:17,035
No, you're not.
180
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,437
We'll hire actors
to play you.
181
00:07:18,504 --> 00:07:19,838
Oh...
Oh... Oh...
182
00:07:19,906 --> 00:07:21,440
But you're all
invited to hollywood
183
00:07:21,507 --> 00:07:23,308
To be consultants
on the show!
184
00:07:23,376 --> 00:07:24,943
Hooray!
Hooray!
185
00:07:25,011 --> 00:07:26,511
But you'll have to pay
your own way there.
186
00:07:26,579 --> 00:07:27,946
Oh...
Oh...
187
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,948
We could all go
in my private jet.
188
00:07:30,016 --> 00:07:31,416
Hooray!
Hooray!
189
00:07:31,484 --> 00:07:33,585
But we're all out
of salted nuts.
190
00:07:33,653 --> 00:07:34,886
Oh...
Oh... Oh...
191
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:36,388
I've had enough
of this silliness.
192
00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:37,989
I'm out of here.
193
00:07:38,057 --> 00:07:39,858
Hooray!
Hooray!
194
00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:43,161
I heard that.
195
00:07:55,808 --> 00:07:58,477
I've been in l.A.
For 2 minutes,
196
00:07:58,544 --> 00:08:01,246
And all I've done
is sweat.
197
00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:03,415
Maddie, cheer up.
At least you're not ice-fishing.
198
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:05,917
How does a private jet
lose someone's luggage?
199
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:08,353
Well, your suitcase
did look like garbage.
200
00:08:08,421 --> 00:08:10,255
My baggage handlers
probably threw it out.
201
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:11,723
Yeah, but everybody else
got to change on the plane,
202
00:08:11,791 --> 00:08:13,658
And I've got
nothing to wear.
203
00:08:13,726 --> 00:08:15,227
Sweetie, I've seen
your wardrobe.
204
00:08:15,294 --> 00:08:17,395
Trust me, they did
you a favor.
205
00:08:17,463 --> 00:08:19,097
[horn honking]
206
00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:23,368
[excited conversation]
207
00:08:23,436 --> 00:08:25,370
If I were
any cooler,
208
00:08:25,438 --> 00:08:28,540
I'd be frozen.
Ha ha ha!
209
00:08:28,608 --> 00:08:30,575
All right, everybody,
into the car.
210
00:08:30,643 --> 00:08:33,578
Yeah. Let's go
drive around hollywood
211
00:08:33,646 --> 00:08:35,547
And see if we can spot
some celebrities.
212
00:08:35,615 --> 00:08:37,616
Ooh! Maybe we'll see
johnny vain.
213
00:08:37,683 --> 00:08:39,050
Oh, I love him.
214
00:08:39,118 --> 00:08:41,019
Next to george clooney,
he's my favorite.
215
00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:44,489
A mother can dream.
216
00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:46,291
And then,
after we meet,
217
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:48,527
Johnny will fall
in love with me
218
00:08:48,594 --> 00:08:52,364
And offer to buy me
some summer clothes.
219
00:08:52,431 --> 00:08:54,399
Yeah, that's
going to happen.
220
00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:57,335
All right,
everybody in .
221
00:08:57,403 --> 00:08:58,937
Get your seatbelts.
222
00:08:59,005 --> 00:09:00,238
Ok. Seatbelts on.♪
223
00:09:00,306 --> 00:09:02,407
, ye ♪
224
00:09:03,910 --> 00:09:06,411
♪ lo♪ to the top,,
ain't gonna stop ♪
225
00:09:06,479 --> 00:09:08,780
♪ everything's ok ♪
226
00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:11,049
♪ another perfect day ♪
227
00:09:11,117 --> 00:09:13,652
♪ hollywood,
we're here to stay ♪
228
00:09:13,719 --> 00:09:15,687
♪ girls are screaming,
hearts are beating ♪
229
00:09:15,755 --> 00:09:18,223
♪ what a feeling,
yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
230
00:09:18,291 --> 00:09:20,191
♪ another perfect day ♪
231
00:09:20,259 --> 00:09:24,062
♪ lk out, world,
we're on our way ♪
232
00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:27,065
Those girls are
playing volleyball in their bikinis.
233
00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:30,869
Wow! Look at that
incredible array of waterfowl!
234
00:10:59,000 --> 00:10:59,800
[knocking]
235
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:01,200
Come in.
236
00:11:01,201 --> 00:11:01,166
Hello, everyone.
Do not worry.
237
00:11:02,167 --> 00:11:03,434
I have alerted
the manager
238
00:11:03,502 --> 00:11:04,768
To the problems
with our rooms.
239
00:11:04,836 --> 00:11:06,437
"what problem?"
what problem?
240
00:11:06,505 --> 00:11:08,939
Oh. Ok. Well,
my complimentary shower cap
241
00:11:09,007 --> 00:11:11,275
Has a hole in it!
242
00:11:12,535 --> 00:11:14,602
I'm surprised
they haven't shut the place down.
243
00:11:14,670 --> 00:11:17,005
[telephone ringing]
244
00:11:17,073 --> 00:11:18,173
!
245
00:11:50,204 --> 00:11:51,772
I bet their office
is incredible.
246
00:11:51,839 --> 00:11:53,006
Yeah.
I can't wait.
247
00:11:53,074 --> 00:11:55,475
They probably have
hot secretaries.
248
00:11:55,543 --> 00:11:57,844
And genuine
burlwood credenzas!
249
00:12:00,481 --> 00:12:02,516
♪ another perfect day ♪
250
00:12:02,583 --> 00:12:05,018
♪ hollywood,
we're here to stay ♪
251
00:12:05,086 --> 00:12:07,587
♪ the sun is shining,
music's playing ♪
252
00:12:07,655 --> 00:12:09,923
♪ what a feeling,
yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
253
00:12:09,991 --> 00:12:14,261
♪ just another perfect, another
perfect, another perfect day ♪
254
00:12:14,328 --> 00:12:16,496
[knock on door]
255
00:12:18,332 --> 00:12:19,933
Oh, look who it is!
256
00:12:20,001 --> 00:12:21,968
My 2 favorite kids
in the whole wide world...
257
00:12:22,036 --> 00:12:23,503
And some other people.
258
00:12:23,571 --> 00:12:26,506
Oh, lou, kiss
their heads, hmm?
259
00:12:26,574 --> 00:12:29,576
[mwah mwah]
260
00:12:29,644 --> 00:12:32,512
Uh...I don't mean
to interrupt,
261
00:12:32,580 --> 00:12:34,414
But I need to
make some copies.
262
00:12:34,482 --> 00:12:36,083
Oh, sure, go ahead.
It's right over there.
263
00:12:36,150 --> 00:12:37,084
Thank you.
264
00:12:37,151 --> 00:12:39,853
Wait. Your office
is the copy room?
265
00:12:39,921 --> 00:12:43,223
So much for your
burlwood credenzas.
266
00:12:43,291 --> 00:12:45,492
Pay no attention
to the copying machine.
267
00:12:45,560 --> 00:12:48,662
You don't even notice it.
268
00:12:48,730 --> 00:12:50,464
[copying machine
running loudly]
269
00:12:52,934 --> 00:12:55,535
[loudly] so, I want
to ask you guys
270
00:12:55,603 --> 00:12:58,038
About your lives
in the hotel.
271
00:12:58,106 --> 00:13:00,741
So you can create
three-dimensional characters
272
00:13:00,808 --> 00:13:02,809
That ring true
to the viewing audience?
273
00:13:02,877 --> 00:13:04,311
Right on
the snot locker.
274
00:13:04,378 --> 00:13:06,213
Lou, kiss him
on the head.
275
00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:07,314
[mwah]
276
00:13:07,381 --> 00:13:08,749
Love this kid.
277
00:13:08,816 --> 00:13:10,283
Excuse me.
278
00:13:10,351 --> 00:13:12,052
I'm done.
279
00:13:12,120 --> 00:13:14,855
Good for you.
You're gonna go far.
280
00:13:14,922 --> 00:13:17,991
Thanks, dad.
281
00:13:20,595 --> 00:13:23,196
Anywho, everybody
take a seat.
282
00:13:24,232 --> 00:13:26,166
You guys back in the back.
283
00:13:26,234 --> 00:13:28,769
The ladies get
the front row.
284
00:13:28,836 --> 00:13:32,606
Oh! That hurts.
Ow! Ooh!
285
00:13:32,673 --> 00:13:35,442
So, zack, cody, tell us
some of the wild things
286
00:13:35,510 --> 00:13:36,943
You've done
at the hotel.
287
00:13:37,011 --> 00:13:38,545
Oh. Well...
288
00:13:39,781 --> 00:13:41,782
I...Can't think
of a thing.
289
00:13:41,849 --> 00:13:43,617
I'm drawing
a blank.
290
00:13:43,684 --> 00:13:45,185
You know, maybe
we should do
291
00:13:45,253 --> 00:13:46,686
These interviews
privately,
292
00:13:46,754 --> 00:13:48,021
The twins first.
293
00:13:48,089 --> 00:13:49,456
Everybody else,
will you excuse us?
294
00:13:49,524 --> 00:13:50,524
Yeah.
Sure.
295
00:13:50,591 --> 00:13:52,192
Uh!
Uh! Uh!
296
00:13:52,260 --> 00:13:53,860
[laughter]
297
00:13:53,928 --> 00:13:55,395
So...So wait.
298
00:13:55,463 --> 00:13:59,132
So the fire department
found the monkey in the vent?
299
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:00,333
No, no, no.
No, no, no.
300
00:14:00,401 --> 00:14:03,203
The police department
found the python in the vent.
301
00:14:03,271 --> 00:14:05,472
Well, then who
found the monkey?
302
00:14:05,540 --> 00:14:08,708
Nobody. It's still
somewhere in the hotel.
303
00:14:08,776 --> 00:14:10,610
[laughter]
304
00:14:10,678 --> 00:14:12,913
Classic. Oh...
305
00:14:12,980 --> 00:14:15,315
Oh, I'm tearing.
306
00:14:15,383 --> 00:14:17,384
Oh...
307
00:14:17,451 --> 00:14:19,486
Tell us
about yourself.
308
00:14:19,554 --> 00:14:22,322
Well, with me,
what you see is what you get--
309
00:14:22,390 --> 00:14:23,824
A poor, hardworking,
310
00:14:23,891 --> 00:14:26,927
"pull herself up
by her bootstraps" kind of girl.
311
00:14:26,994 --> 00:14:29,329
You're wearing
an arturo vitali hat.
312
00:14:29,397 --> 00:14:31,832
Oh. Ha ha. No.
That's just because
313
00:14:31,899 --> 00:14:34,634
The private jet
lost my luggage.
314
00:14:36,571 --> 00:14:38,271
Well, I'm a singer
at the hotel,
315
00:14:38,339 --> 00:14:40,941
But first and foremost,
I'm a mom.
316
00:14:41,008 --> 00:14:42,542
I cook...
317
00:14:42,610 --> 00:14:44,177
And I clean...
318
00:14:44,245 --> 00:14:45,946
And I drive carpool...
319
00:14:46,013 --> 00:14:47,848
And you're just pretending to
write all this down, aren't you?
320
00:14:47,915 --> 00:14:49,149
Uh-huh.
321
00:14:49,217 --> 00:14:53,420
Actually, I'm drawing you
in a coconut bikini.
322
00:14:53,487 --> 00:14:55,422
Uh-huh.
323
00:14:58,010 --> 00:14:59,076
I'm rich.
324
00:14:59,144 --> 00:15:02,637
I know. I've got
5 pads of that.
325
00:15:02,638 --> 00:15:04,172
Yay me!
326
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,068
Ok
mr. Moseby...
327
00:15:16,135 --> 00:15:17,669
What's
the funniest thing
328
00:15:17,737 --> 00:15:19,538
That ever happened
at the hotel?
329
00:15:19,606 --> 00:15:20,672
The funniest thing...
330
00:15:20,740 --> 00:15:22,341
Oh, ok.
331
00:15:22,408 --> 00:15:26,345
One time, we ran out
of pillow mints.
332
00:15:26,412 --> 00:15:28,080
[stifling laughter]
333
00:15:30,116 --> 00:15:33,585
So instead,
we had to use...
334
00:15:33,653 --> 00:15:36,121
Wait for it.
335
00:15:36,189 --> 00:15:38,724
Nougat! Ha!
336
00:15:40,426 --> 00:15:42,895
Nougat!
337
00:15:44,931 --> 00:15:46,031
[laughter]
338
00:15:46,099 --> 00:15:47,065
Wait, wait, wait.
339
00:15:47,133 --> 00:15:48,567
Isn't that
against the law?
340
00:15:48,635 --> 00:15:50,035
Yeah, but if you're
under 18,
341
00:15:50,103 --> 00:15:51,503
They let you off
with a warning.
342
00:15:51,571 --> 00:15:56,041
Especially if you make
a "I can't find my mommy" face.
343
00:15:56,109 --> 00:15:57,676
[laughter]
344
00:15:57,744 --> 00:16:00,612
Oh, we're going to be
such a smash!
345
00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:02,481
All: Whoa, whoa, whoa.
346
00:16:02,549 --> 00:16:05,384
Aye-yi-yi-yi-yi.
347
00:16:11,777 --> 00:16:15,713
Whoa! This place
is huge!
348
00:16:15,781 --> 00:16:17,982
Look how high
the ceiling is!
349
00:16:18,050 --> 00:16:19,817
And there's
a walkway up there!
350
00:16:19,885 --> 00:16:21,352
No.
Do you think we--
351
00:16:21,420 --> 00:16:22,820
Well, what if we could--
352
00:16:22,888 --> 00:16:24,021
No.
How about--
353
00:16:24,089 --> 00:16:26,190
Don't even think
about it.
354
00:16:26,258 --> 00:16:28,493
There they are.
Lou, kiss their heads.
355
00:16:28,560 --> 00:16:29,560
Aw...
356
00:16:29,628 --> 00:16:31,329
[mwah mwah]
357
00:16:31,396 --> 00:16:33,498
Good call
on the hats.
358
00:16:33,565 --> 00:16:35,433
Come on, guys. I got
something to show you.
359
00:16:37,936 --> 00:16:39,237
Uh!
360
00:16:39,304 --> 00:16:41,339
Oh, wow!
361
00:16:41,406 --> 00:16:44,008
There's your counter.
362
00:16:45,844 --> 00:16:48,746
Well, I can't believe
they stole our lobby.
363
00:16:48,814 --> 00:16:52,216
But the joke's on them.
They forgot the ceiling.
364
00:16:53,352 --> 00:16:55,153
London, honey, they didn't
steal the lobby.
365
00:16:55,220 --> 00:16:56,721
They built one
just like it.
366
00:16:56,789 --> 00:17:00,124
Really? Then I'm going to
check out the rooftop pool!
367
00:17:00,192 --> 00:17:02,260
London, that elevator
is not--
368
00:17:02,327 --> 00:17:04,028
Mom, let it go.
Let it go.
369
00:17:04,096 --> 00:17:05,830
She'll catch on
eventually.
370
00:17:07,166 --> 00:17:08,833
I hope.
371
00:17:08,901 --> 00:17:11,402
What's wrong
with this thing?
372
00:17:11,470 --> 00:17:13,638
Honey, that elevator
is never showing up.
373
00:17:13,705 --> 00:17:14,639
It's broken?
374
00:17:14,706 --> 00:17:16,541
Yeah. That's it.
375
00:17:16,608 --> 00:17:18,075
Ok...
376
00:17:18,143 --> 00:17:19,343
Now...
377
00:17:19,411 --> 00:17:22,346
For the fun part--and lou
is tingling over this...
378
00:17:22,414 --> 00:17:23,781
I am!
379
00:17:23,849 --> 00:17:25,283
I want you to meet
the actors
380
00:17:25,350 --> 00:17:27,185
We've hired
to play you.
381
00:17:27,252 --> 00:17:28,519
Oh! Where?
382
00:17:28,587 --> 00:17:31,889
Hey.
383
00:17:35,494 --> 00:17:37,295
Oh, my goodness!
384
00:17:37,362 --> 00:17:38,629
I love your hair!
385
00:17:38,697 --> 00:17:39,897
I love your hair!
386
00:17:39,965 --> 00:17:42,300
Oh, I am just so excited
to be playing
387
00:17:42,367 --> 00:17:44,302
Just a smart, attractive,
focused person.
388
00:17:44,369 --> 00:17:47,238
Thank you
for being you.
389
00:17:48,373 --> 00:17:49,740
Be my best friend!
390
00:17:49,808 --> 00:17:50,741
Ok!
391
00:17:50,809 --> 00:17:52,243
Aah!
Aah!
392
00:17:56,849 --> 00:18:00,484
Totally.
And I'm mondo excited!
393
00:18:02,054 --> 00:18:04,589
Um, if you don't
mind my asking,
394
00:18:04,656 --> 00:18:05,990
How old are you?
395
00:18:06,058 --> 00:18:09,627
22. But don't freak.
I've played old before.
396
00:18:12,064 --> 00:18:14,732
That's nice.
397
00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:17,535
Uh...It's a pleasure
to meet you.
398
00:18:17,603 --> 00:18:20,638
Yo, b, what's up, man?
Peep this crib. It's tight, huh?
399
00:18:20,706 --> 00:18:22,306
Well, this man
400
00:18:22,374 --> 00:18:23,841
Cannot possibly
play me!
401
00:18:23,909 --> 00:18:25,109
It's
an abomination!
402
00:18:25,177 --> 00:18:26,510
This man cannot
possibly play me.
403
00:18:26,578 --> 00:18:28,713
It's an abomination.
404
00:18:28,780 --> 00:18:31,782
You'll do.
405
00:18:35,787 --> 00:18:38,322
Ooh, writer man,
who's going to play me?
406
00:18:38,390 --> 00:18:40,458
London...
Meet madrid.
407
00:18:43,395 --> 00:18:46,030
Why is my actress
a boy?
408
00:18:46,098 --> 00:18:47,565
Well, you see,
the network wanted
409
00:18:47,633 --> 00:18:49,467
A little romance
between the owner's kid
410
00:18:49,534 --> 00:18:51,135
And the candy-counter girl.
411
00:18:51,203 --> 00:18:52,670
But I would never
date maddie.
412
00:18:52,738 --> 00:18:54,939
She's not my type.
She's poor.
413
00:18:55,007 --> 00:18:59,443
Yeah, and who did
her hair--an eggbeater?
414
00:18:59,511 --> 00:19:02,847
Oh! You are me!
Yay us!
415
00:19:05,651 --> 00:19:08,519
Almost.
You'll get it.
416
00:19:08,587 --> 00:19:10,922
And now here's
the best part. Boys!
417
00:19:13,158 --> 00:19:17,895
Ha ha!
Hey, hey, hey.
418
00:19:17,963 --> 00:19:21,299
So...Aren't you
the cutest little thing?
419
00:19:21,366 --> 00:19:24,669
Looks like somebody left me
in the dryer too long.
420
00:19:24,736 --> 00:19:27,038
For the record,
I've done 200 commercials,
421
00:19:27,105 --> 00:19:31,542
I own a beach house,
and I've kissed lindsay lohan.
422
00:19:31,610 --> 00:19:34,145
I approve. Ha ha.
423
00:19:34,212 --> 00:19:36,113
It's a pleasure
to meet you.
424
00:19:36,181 --> 00:19:37,648
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
425
00:19:37,716 --> 00:19:39,283
Look, I'm only doing this
426
00:19:39,351 --> 00:19:41,118
Because my movie deal
fell through,
427
00:19:41,186 --> 00:19:44,689
And I plan to lose
the goofy vest in season 2.
428
00:19:44,756 --> 00:19:47,124
Huh. I hate me.
429
00:19:47,192 --> 00:19:48,659
Man: Hey, bud.
430
00:19:48,727 --> 00:19:50,294
Hey, look who it is!
It's our director!
431
00:19:50,362 --> 00:19:52,596
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The network executives are here.
432
00:19:52,664 --> 00:19:55,066
Oh. Hey,
everybody, act calm!
433
00:19:55,133 --> 00:19:56,634
Don't look them
in the eye.
434
00:19:56,702 --> 00:19:58,069
Yeah, yeah.
Whatever, whatever.
435
00:19:58,136 --> 00:19:59,904
Ok. Ok, everybody.
Let's do some comedy.
436
00:19:59,972 --> 00:20:01,138
Comedy coming
right away.
437
00:20:01,206 --> 00:20:02,373
Places. Places.
438
00:20:02,441 --> 00:20:04,141
[excited conversation]
439
00:20:04,209 --> 00:20:06,310
Here we go. Hey.
440
00:20:06,378 --> 00:20:09,113
[excited conversation]
441
00:20:09,181 --> 00:20:11,449
London: This is
so much fun.
442
00:20:11,516 --> 00:20:12,984
I hope their outfits
are cute.
443
00:20:13,051 --> 00:20:15,453
And you guys!
444
00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:16,821
Quiet!
445
00:20:16,888 --> 00:20:18,155
Sorry.
Sorry. Sorry.
446
00:20:18,223 --> 00:20:19,390
All right.
447
00:20:19,458 --> 00:20:21,892
And...Action.
448
00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:23,995
[elevator dings]
449
00:20:24,062 --> 00:20:26,063
Jeepers. The circus
is leaving,
450
00:20:26,131 --> 00:20:28,699
And we still haven't
found mr. Chips.
451
00:20:28,767 --> 00:20:30,401
Ha ha ha!
452
00:20:30,469 --> 00:20:32,703
You had to teach him
how to use a screwdriver.
453
00:20:34,072 --> 00:20:36,407
Ha ha ha!
Ho! Ha ha ha!
454
00:20:36,475 --> 00:20:39,410
Hey, sweet thing.
455
00:20:39,478 --> 00:20:41,579
It's supposed to be
"sweet thang."
456
00:20:41,646 --> 00:20:44,215
I'll take a licorice whip
and your phone number.
457
00:20:44,282 --> 00:20:50,154
Ok. It's 123-4567.
458
00:20:50,222 --> 00:20:52,990
Wait. What comes
after the 3?
459
00:20:53,058 --> 00:20:54,859
Ok, ok, cut.
460
00:20:54,926 --> 00:20:56,861
Cut, cut, cut.
461
00:20:56,928 --> 00:20:59,096
Bud: What cut?
What are you cutting?
462
00:20:59,164 --> 00:21:00,297
What?
463
00:21:00,365 --> 00:21:02,366
All right, look.
The network hates the boys.
464
00:21:02,434 --> 00:21:04,068
And they think
they're too young.
465
00:21:04,136 --> 00:21:05,636
Well, you tell
the network
466
00:21:05,704 --> 00:21:07,738
We stand behind
our actors 100%.
467
00:21:07,806 --> 00:21:09,240
They said either
get older boys,
468
00:21:09,307 --> 00:21:11,042
Or they'll shut down
the show.
469
00:21:11,109 --> 00:21:12,943
Boys, you're fired.
470
00:21:14,312 --> 00:21:17,148
Fine. You'll
be hearing from our lawyers.
471
00:21:17,215 --> 00:21:20,584
Hey...You want to
ride the luggage cart?
472
00:21:20,652 --> 00:21:24,655
You bet. Moseby
can't stop us here.
473
00:21:27,692 --> 00:21:29,326
Where are we going
to find older twins
474
00:21:29,394 --> 00:21:31,362
Who are cute,
charming, and funny?
475
00:21:31,430 --> 00:21:33,164
Coming through.
476
00:21:33,231 --> 00:21:34,265
Guys!
477
00:21:34,332 --> 00:21:36,934
Lou, are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
478
00:21:37,002 --> 00:21:39,703
That I overpaid for
my hair transplants?
479
00:21:39,771 --> 00:21:41,772
Look out!
Oh!
480
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:44,008
Oh! How about
these twins?
481
00:21:44,076 --> 00:21:46,577
Lou, you're a genius!
482
00:21:46,645 --> 00:21:49,680
Oh, it didn't break.
483
00:21:49,748 --> 00:21:51,849
Plastic! Ha ha ha!Y
in holly
484
00:21:51,917 --> 00:21:53,484
Boys, listen...
485
00:21:55,420 --> 00:21:56,687
And coming out here
486
00:21:58,490 --> 00:22:00,391
Yes!
Yes! Yes!
487
00:22:00,459 --> 00:22:02,393
Oh, thank you!
Thank you! Thank you!
488
00:22:02,461 --> 00:22:04,462
My prayers have lofted
through the clouds
489
00:22:04,529 --> 00:22:06,297
And fallen
on merciful ears.
490
00:22:06,364 --> 00:22:09,967
Hey, I think we got
our new twins.
491
00:22:10,035 --> 00:22:10,901
Dibs on zack.
492
00:22:10,969 --> 00:22:12,903
Oh, you're
always zack.
493
00:22:12,971 --> 00:22:14,171
So, we got a deal?
494
00:22:14,239 --> 00:22:15,873
No. Wait a minute.
495
00:22:15,941 --> 00:22:18,943
This is a big decision.
We need to think about it.
496
00:22:19,811 --> 00:22:22,012
I'm done thinking.
Me, too.
497
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:24,582
Deal! I love these guys!
Cody, kiss their heads.
498
00:22:24,632 --> 00:22:29,182
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