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1
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That's my boy, that's my boy
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Aren't you getting up?
3
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Not until I've done at least four clues.
4
00:00:45,260 --> 00:00:47,430
Oh, you mean you're staying in bed all
day?
5
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Stupid, you know.
6
00:00:49,220 --> 00:00:51,390
Of course you're not. What are you stuck
on?
7
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Infant. Four letters. Begins with B.
8
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Brat.
9
00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:57,090
You are clever.
10
00:00:57,940 --> 00:01:00,650
You're not right, though. Not if yellow
starts with a Y.
11
00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:02,020
Well, he always does.
12
00:01:02,021 --> 00:01:03,359
Good morning.
13
00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:07,620
It's pouring with rain. The milkman's
late and I've broken the yolk on your
14
00:01:08,220 --> 00:01:09,360
What are you stuck on?
15
00:01:09,900 --> 00:01:11,760
Infant four letters begins with baby.
16
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Hey! Why didn't you think of that?
17
00:01:15,041 --> 00:01:16,359
I thought of Brad.
18
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You would.
19
00:01:18,060 --> 00:01:19,120
Oh, I got one.
20
00:01:19,700 --> 00:01:22,300
King Herod. King who?
21
00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:24,940
King Herod. I don't believe it.
22
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It's five across.
23
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It is two.
24
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Fancy making a clue out of a man like
that. I'm writing to the editor.
25
00:01:32,381 --> 00:01:34,439
Before you do, has anyone written to me?
26
00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:35,159
Oh, yes.
27
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All the brown ones.
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Sorry, I are.
29
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One's for you, love. Thanks, Ida. Oh,
Katie.
30
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Who? Katie, you know, my cousin.
31
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The one with... The big knockers.
32
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I'm sorry, but they are. They are the
biggest... Now, don't go on.
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Oh, that's terrible.
34
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Why, what's happened?
35
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They've fallen off.
36
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I won't warn you again.
37
00:02:00,510 --> 00:02:01,890
Oh, that's tragic.
38
00:02:02,090 --> 00:02:04,070
That really is tragic. Oh, poor Katie.
39
00:02:04,410 --> 00:02:06,230
Andy, love, what's the matter?
40
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Married a year?
41
00:02:08,970 --> 00:02:12,570
Oh, life can be cruel, that poor girl.
42
00:02:12,571 --> 00:02:16,289
Hang about. What's the matter with her?
Well, like Angie says, it's tragic. I
43
00:02:16,290 --> 00:02:18,940
mean, how would you feel if... Yeah,
what is the matter?
44
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She's had a baby.
45
00:02:21,190 --> 00:02:24,610
She hasn't? Oh, wait a minute. What's
wrong with that?
46
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Well, everything. She'll have to give up
working.
47
00:02:27,470 --> 00:02:31,749
And he'll have to trade in the sports
car? For a family saloon. And he
48
00:02:31,750 --> 00:02:32,389
that car?
49
00:02:32,390 --> 00:02:33,440
Oh, could you both?
50
00:02:33,790 --> 00:02:37,040
Well, he'll just have to start
worshipping that baby, won't he?
51
00:02:37,210 --> 00:02:39,610
He's had the sweets, now he can have the
sours.
52
00:02:41,270 --> 00:02:46,149
And mark my words, in two or three
weeks, that little boy will have him...
53
00:02:46,150 --> 00:02:47,470
are they going to call him?
54
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Charlotte Louise.
55
00:02:50,130 --> 00:02:51,180
Well,
56
00:02:52,070 --> 00:02:54,370
little girls can be very nice, too.
57
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I hope so, for our sake.
58
00:02:55,691 --> 00:02:58,209
What do you mean, for our sake? What's
it got to do with us?
59
00:02:58,210 --> 00:02:59,290
We're the godparents.
60
00:02:59,730 --> 00:03:00,850
What an honour.
61
00:03:01,150 --> 00:03:03,350
And what a nerve. Why should we be
lumbered?
62
00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:05,200
with a dear little baby?
63
00:03:05,201 --> 00:03:09,079
You'll have dear little birthdays and
dear little Christmases and dear Uncle
64
00:03:09,080 --> 00:03:10,759
Robert, will you take me to the who?
65
00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:12,080
No way, Charlotte Louise.
66
00:03:12,420 --> 00:03:15,940
Oh, you ought to join King Herod in
Fiver Cross.
67
00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:21,819
Poor little mate, what a welcome to the
world. I only hope she never hears what
68
00:03:21,820 --> 00:03:26,360
you've just said. She'd grow up warped.
She'd grow up unloved and unwanted.
69
00:03:27,300 --> 00:03:29,410
Not if she's got knockers like her
mother.
70
00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:38,410
Oh, well, I'll have his grey suit
cleaned.
71
00:03:38,620 --> 00:03:40,000
There's no point. He won't go.
72
00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:41,460
And that nice blue tie.
73
00:03:44,711 --> 00:03:48,899
What was this doing on the kitchen
table?
74
00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:52,359
Oh, it's waiting for you. Don't hold it
like that. His little eyes will fall
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00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:53,410
out.
76
00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:59,659
Whose is it? It's yours, but don't get
too attached to it because you're giving
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00:03:59,660 --> 00:04:00,800
it to Charlotte Louise.
78
00:04:01,450 --> 00:04:05,329
I thought we were giving her that. Yes,
you are, only this is the sort of show
79
00:04:05,330 --> 00:04:07,050
-off thing for the mummy and daddy.
80
00:04:07,370 --> 00:04:11,330
The baby wants something cuddly. That's
why you're giving her Flopsy.
81
00:04:11,970 --> 00:04:14,390
Flopsy? Well, that's what I call it.
82
00:04:14,391 --> 00:04:16,809
That's not what I call it, and I'm not
holding it.
83
00:04:16,810 --> 00:04:19,160
If it had big knockers, you'd never let
go of it.
84
00:04:23,110 --> 00:04:24,160
Straighten your tie.
85
00:04:25,010 --> 00:04:28,010
I put this on in the end. Oh, and very
nice, dear.
86
00:04:28,011 --> 00:04:29,409
Do you think it'll do?
87
00:04:29,410 --> 00:04:31,829
Well, I think it'll have to, cos you're
pushed for time.
88
00:04:31,830 --> 00:04:33,690
What do people wear for christening?
89
00:04:33,870 --> 00:04:36,570
Well, the vicar wears black and the baby
wears white.
90
00:04:37,050 --> 00:04:39,530
And everybody else wears something
washable.
91
00:04:40,730 --> 00:04:41,780
Why washable?
92
00:04:42,130 --> 00:04:43,830
Babies will be babies, Shane.
93
00:04:44,170 --> 00:04:46,280
Oh, I'm changing into jeans and a
sweater.
94
00:04:46,390 --> 00:04:47,440
No, you are not.
95
00:04:47,490 --> 00:04:51,230
Anyway, you won't have to hold the poor
little mite if you don't want to.
96
00:04:51,530 --> 00:04:52,670
Thank heavens for that.
97
00:04:52,710 --> 00:04:55,420
Oh, you will, love. You'll have to.
You're the god mummy.
98
00:04:55,550 --> 00:04:57,870
I suppose if I hold it... Like this?
99
00:04:58,370 --> 00:05:00,660
Well, if you hold it like that, it will
be sick.
100
00:05:01,850 --> 00:05:05,770
Now, see, you put one hand under
there... It has lost a knife!
101
00:05:06,550 --> 00:05:07,600
Well,
102
00:05:08,430 --> 00:05:09,930
come on, both of you, help me.
103
00:05:10,230 --> 00:05:14,530
And that's not leaving this flat until
I've stitched it in very firmly.
104
00:05:24,821 --> 00:05:26,709
Come on, come on.
105
00:05:26,710 --> 00:05:27,589
We're here.
106
00:05:27,590 --> 00:05:29,070
No, not you, the lift.
107
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:33,090
See, now, while we're waiting, when you
get to the responses... The what?
108
00:05:33,091 --> 00:05:34,269
The responses.
109
00:05:34,270 --> 00:05:38,270
I don't want any muttering. Say what
you've got to say loud and clear.
110
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What do we have to say?
111
00:05:39,790 --> 00:05:43,030
Well, do you renounce the devil and all
his works?
112
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I do.
113
00:05:45,890 --> 00:05:46,970
But I don't.
114
00:05:48,370 --> 00:05:50,850
I don't think I do. What are all his
works?
115
00:05:51,270 --> 00:05:53,570
Pride, covetousness, lust.
116
00:05:54,919 --> 00:05:57,860
Anger, gluttony, envy, sloth.
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I don't.
118
00:05:59,431 --> 00:06:01,519
There's no way I'm renouncing love.
119
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:03,440
It's love that makes the world go round.
120
00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:07,220
Well, I know that and you know that, but
you'll never convince the vicar.
121
00:06:08,420 --> 00:06:10,620
Anyway, you're not renouncing anything.
122
00:06:10,960 --> 00:06:13,820
It's Charlotte Louise. You're responding
on her behalf.
123
00:06:13,821 --> 00:06:17,739
She'll hate us when she grows up. We'll
tell her we kept our fingers crossed.
124
00:06:17,740 --> 00:06:20,600
Where's that damn lift? Oh, and you on
your way to church.
125
00:06:21,180 --> 00:06:23,800
But I know what you mean. Where is the
silly thing?
126
00:06:24,140 --> 00:06:25,660
Oh, it's coming. I can hear it.
127
00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:31,259
It's making ever such a funny noise, a
sort of moaning and groaning. Why should
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00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:33,200
it be moaning and groaning, Shane?
129
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,460
Ah, a welcoming committee.
130
00:06:37,461 --> 00:06:41,359
They can't stop. They're on the way to
renounce the devil and all his works.
131
00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:45,700
devil and all his... Robert, you haven't
joined the moon, have you? Oh, tell me.
132
00:06:47,980 --> 00:06:51,470
you haven't joined the Moonies. I
haven't joined the Moonies. Bye, Mum.
133
00:06:52,220 --> 00:06:56,240
But surely you've time to... Obviously
not.
134
00:06:56,740 --> 00:07:00,760
Well, I... What's that, Mrs. Willis?
What's what, Mrs. Price?
135
00:07:00,761 --> 00:07:02,199
That, Mrs.
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00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:04,940
Willis. Oh, that. I knew we wouldn't
take it.
137
00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:06,910
Tell me,
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Mrs. Willis, whose baby is it?
139
00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:14,100
Angie's cousin, Katie.
140
00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:16,840
Katie? Not... Katie Ringwood?
141
00:07:17,180 --> 00:07:18,740
I don't know about the Ringwood.
142
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:21,160
But that means she married.
143
00:07:21,580 --> 00:07:24,060
Well, I hope so, for the poor little
baby's sake.
144
00:07:24,940 --> 00:07:25,990
It's astonishing.
145
00:07:26,160 --> 00:07:29,380
Why? Well, I don't want to say too much.
146
00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:31,260
You've not said anything so far.
147
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She was at the wedding.
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00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:35,250
What wedding?
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00:07:35,251 --> 00:07:38,899
Robert and Angela's. Of course, in those
days, she was just a slip of a girl.
150
00:07:38,900 --> 00:07:42,680
But even then, Mrs Willis... What, Mrs
Price?
151
00:07:43,530 --> 00:07:47,590
She had the most enormous pair of...
Knockers.
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00:07:50,490 --> 00:07:52,530
I was going to say feet.
153
00:07:54,370 --> 00:07:56,890
I didn't notice her... Knockers.
154
00:07:58,150 --> 00:07:59,200
Shane did.
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00:07:59,201 --> 00:08:03,289
Men. Yes, I know. Will you have another
cup? No, thank you. That was delicious,
156
00:08:03,290 --> 00:08:06,230
but I really must cut my cackle. And get
to your horses.
157
00:08:07,930 --> 00:08:10,530
Exactamal, Mrs. Willis. I want your
woolies.
158
00:08:10,970 --> 00:08:12,020
Pardon?
159
00:08:12,270 --> 00:08:14,930
Only your cast -offs, of course, for my
stall.
160
00:08:15,250 --> 00:08:16,300
What stall?
161
00:08:16,470 --> 00:08:19,470
Well, it's on the vicar's list as odd
balls.
162
00:08:22,290 --> 00:08:24,030
And him a man of the club.
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00:08:26,310 --> 00:08:27,370
Odd balls.
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00:08:28,970 --> 00:08:30,930
Of wool, Mrs Willard.
165
00:08:31,230 --> 00:08:33,010
Oh, I see, Mrs Willard.
166
00:08:34,470 --> 00:08:35,549
What's it in Ada?
167
00:08:35,830 --> 00:08:37,230
Oh, it's a very worthy cause.
168
00:08:37,710 --> 00:08:39,890
So, any old woolies you happen to have?
169
00:08:40,230 --> 00:08:41,289
Old woolies?
170
00:08:41,669 --> 00:08:44,679
For example, what's wrong with the one
you're wearing now?
171
00:08:45,890 --> 00:08:47,170
Nothing, so get off.
172
00:08:48,130 --> 00:08:49,830
Well, I'll see what I can find.
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00:08:54,830 --> 00:08:56,030
Chin up, Flopsy.
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00:08:57,570 --> 00:08:59,630
This is the last of the cast -off.
175
00:09:00,650 --> 00:09:05,170
Oh, is that you two? I'm in the lounge.
Come on in and tell me all about it.
176
00:09:06,190 --> 00:09:07,240
Evening, Ida.
177
00:09:07,241 --> 00:09:08,299
Evening, Ida.
178
00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:09,350
Evening, Angie.
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00:09:10,420 --> 00:09:11,470
Evening, Shane.
180
00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:16,080
I know this looks funny, but there is a
reason for it.
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00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:20,060
Which I'm sure you're dying to hear.
182
00:09:21,780 --> 00:09:23,080
So I'll tell you.
183
00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:29,080
You know, the mummy came round on the
want, as always.
184
00:09:29,420 --> 00:09:31,590
So I've been looking... Where's your
jacket?
185
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:36,800
With my tie, at the dry cleaners. Oh,
the poor little soul was sick.
186
00:09:37,270 --> 00:09:41,890
Very. It couldn't help it. Did I say it
could? No, but you were thinking it. No,
187
00:09:41,910 --> 00:09:43,870
I wasn't. Then what were you thinking?
188
00:09:44,130 --> 00:09:45,270
I don't have to tell you.
189
00:09:45,390 --> 00:09:50,069
Yes, you do, doesn't he, Ida? I'm sorry
you asked me that, because no, I don't
190
00:09:50,070 --> 00:09:51,120
think he does.
191
00:09:52,030 --> 00:09:55,010
I know what she thinks I was thinking,
but I wasn't. You were.
192
00:09:55,510 --> 00:09:56,890
No, I wasn't. Yes, you were.
193
00:09:57,090 --> 00:10:01,000
I know it's a silly question, but does
anybody want to know what I'm thinking?
194
00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:04,379
Because I'm thinking I'll bang your
heads together.
195
00:10:04,380 --> 00:10:08,720
Now, look, what's the matter with the
pair of you? Why aren't you talking?
196
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:15,260
We are talking. Oh, yes, and so chattily
and happily and using such long words.
197
00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:20,439
Well, I'll go straight for the obvious.
Now, was it something that happened at
198
00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:22,540
the christening? Am I right so far?
199
00:10:22,780 --> 00:10:23,830
Yes. No.
200
00:10:24,940 --> 00:10:27,600
That's another quarrel. Save that for
later.
201
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:32,900
Now then, who'd be at the christening?
The baby, of course. The daddy, I hope.
202
00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:34,370
The mummy.
203
00:10:34,940 --> 00:10:37,110
Oh, we're not back to those knockers
again.
204
00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:40,820
No. And they're not what they used to
be.
205
00:10:42,460 --> 00:10:44,180
Forget them. Two red earrings.
206
00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:47,340
It was a beautiful baby.
207
00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:51,880
Did I say it wasn't? No, but you were
thinking it. No, I wasn't. Yes, you
208
00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:53,840
Look, I will knock your heads together.
209
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,930
Either that or lock you in your bedroom
until you... No, no.
210
00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:00,040
You'd enjoy that.
211
00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:03,180
Oh, no, we wouldn't. There'd be nothing
to enjoy.
212
00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:05,160
Oh, not that old threat.
213
00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:07,610
It's not a threat, it's a statement of
fact.
214
00:11:07,680 --> 00:11:09,120
Oh, look, this is ridiculous.
215
00:11:09,300 --> 00:11:13,739
Whatever it is, and you needn't tell me,
cos I'll find out anyway, but don't let
216
00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:14,790
it go any further.
217
00:11:15,020 --> 00:11:17,920
Let not the sun go down upon thy rock.
218
00:11:17,921 --> 00:11:20,559
You're no choice if she doesn't change
her mind.
219
00:11:20,560 --> 00:11:21,940
Or if you don't change yours.
220
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:25,410
Well, I'm not going to. And I'm not
going to. Oh, for heaven's sake!
221
00:11:25,620 --> 00:11:27,420
What is the matter with a pair of you?
222
00:11:27,421 --> 00:11:28,959
It's Angie.
223
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:30,010
She's in love.
224
00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:31,890
She's what?
225
00:11:31,900 --> 00:11:33,800
I suppose it's true in a way.
226
00:11:34,780 --> 00:11:35,830
Yes, it is.
227
00:11:36,700 --> 00:11:38,060
I'm besotted.
228
00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:39,560
Oh, Angie.
229
00:11:40,660 --> 00:11:42,140
Oh, no, it's not more.
230
00:11:43,620 --> 00:11:47,799
And I mean, I realise it's mine, but you
could go a lot further and fare a lot
231
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:50,120
worse. Oh, I'm not in love with a man.
232
00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:51,770
Angie.
233
00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:53,730
It's Charlotte.
234
00:11:56,589 --> 00:11:59,690
And thick a lot. And I bought one of my
own.
235
00:11:59,990 --> 00:12:02,220
And you'll have one, Ange. I keep
telling you.
236
00:12:02,290 --> 00:12:05,210
Well, there you are, you see. There's no
problem.
237
00:12:05,830 --> 00:12:10,809
I mean, all you've got to... Well, you
don't need me to tell you what you've
238
00:12:10,810 --> 00:12:11,509
to do.
239
00:12:11,510 --> 00:12:15,590
But when will I have one? Go on. Tell
Ida what you told me.
240
00:12:16,010 --> 00:12:19,030
When we've always said you'll have one.
Autumn 87.
241
00:12:22,741 --> 00:12:24,629
What did I say?
242
00:12:24,630 --> 00:12:28,010
Autumn 87, that's what you said. You
monster!
243
00:12:28,470 --> 00:12:30,410
Oh, dear Lord.
244
00:12:30,610 --> 00:12:31,660
Oh.
245
00:12:55,020 --> 00:12:56,420
Nice name for a little girl.
246
00:12:57,340 --> 00:12:58,390
Iolanthe.
247
00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:04,100
Yuck! You've said yuck to every
suggestion I've made so far.
248
00:13:04,420 --> 00:13:06,710
Because they've all been yucky
suggestions.
249
00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:08,210
Cleopatra.
250
00:13:08,740 --> 00:13:09,790
Bodicea.
251
00:13:10,180 --> 00:13:16,140
And as for Rapunzel... Well, you said
you wanted something unusual.
252
00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:18,580
And if you let her air grow...
253
00:13:22,480 --> 00:13:24,840
Denzel Price has quite a ring to it.
254
00:13:25,540 --> 00:13:28,580
Let's have a go at boys' names. I want a
boy anyway.
255
00:13:28,581 --> 00:13:32,399
Boys' names, I always think they're
harder. Are we still looking for
256
00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:36,180
unusual? Well, I don't want him to be
laughed at at school.
257
00:13:36,580 --> 00:13:38,540
I've got it. The perfect name.
258
00:13:38,780 --> 00:13:39,830
Fire away.
259
00:13:40,140 --> 00:13:41,190
Rudyard.
260
00:13:43,620 --> 00:13:44,670
What yard?
261
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:48,480
Rudyard, as in Kipling. He wrote if.
262
00:13:49,100 --> 00:13:50,150
If what?
263
00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:55,099
If... You can keep your head when all
about you are losing theirs and blaming
264
00:13:55,100 --> 00:13:55,859
on you.
265
00:13:55,860 --> 00:13:59,360
If you... Well, do you like it? I hate
it.
266
00:13:59,720 --> 00:14:00,820
Very well, then.
267
00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:02,350
I'm sorry.
268
00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:05,400
No, don't be. I mean, it's your baby.
Call it what you like.
269
00:14:05,980 --> 00:14:07,480
But I shall call it Rudyard.
270
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:10,880
We'd better start hoping for a girl.
271
00:14:11,160 --> 00:14:13,750
Well, then I'll call her Rapunzel so you
can't ring.
272
00:14:14,780 --> 00:14:15,830
Oh,
273
00:14:16,080 --> 00:14:17,420
what are you doing?
274
00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:19,020
I think I've gone a bit wrong.
275
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:23,380
Yes, I think you have. Come on, let's
have a look.
276
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:26,640
It's a good thing this baby's not due
until 87.
277
00:14:27,780 --> 00:14:29,460
Oh, I'm not waiting till then.
278
00:14:29,461 --> 00:14:30,659
Aren't you?
279
00:14:30,660 --> 00:14:31,439
Oh, no.
280
00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:32,780
I want it for Christmas.
281
00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:34,530
This Christmas?
282
00:14:34,980 --> 00:14:36,030
Yes.
283
00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:40,750
Well, that gives you about three days to
get cracking.
284
00:14:42,900 --> 00:14:47,179
Look, I know that we're doing all this
knitting, but how do you think you're
285
00:14:47,180 --> 00:14:48,800
going to get Shane to cooperate?
286
00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:51,800
Easy. I'm going to wear him down.
287
00:14:53,700 --> 00:14:54,840
Wear him down?
288
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:59,239
Just go on and on and on and on and on
and on. All right, all right, I get the
289
00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:03,880
message. But don't you think that your
best bet would be friendly persuasion?
290
00:15:03,881 --> 00:15:05,119
What do you mean?
291
00:15:05,120 --> 00:15:09,380
Well, you know, a low -cut nightie and
perfume on your pulse points.
292
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:13,840
And your generation thinks it invented
it.
293
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,180
I tried all that last night.
294
00:15:16,620 --> 00:15:19,680
And? He said if I had a baby, I'd smell
of Dettol.
295
00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:23,120
Well, he's right, you would.
296
00:15:23,700 --> 00:15:27,670
There you are, you're straight now. Just
battle on, wouldn't it, one pearl one?
297
00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:28,770
Thank you.
298
00:15:29,260 --> 00:15:30,310
Of course.
299
00:15:31,260 --> 00:15:33,400
You could always try getting him tiddly.
300
00:15:35,300 --> 00:15:38,320
Well, the thing is... Yeah?
301
00:15:39,140 --> 00:15:40,600
He's no good when he's tiddly.
302
00:15:45,220 --> 00:15:46,270
Isn't he?
303
00:15:49,860 --> 00:15:50,910
Angie? Hmm?
304
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:53,840
What's he like when he's sober?
305
00:15:56,700 --> 00:15:58,000
Ida! Sorry, sorry.
306
00:15:59,940 --> 00:16:02,360
Oh, we know who that'll be, don't we?
307
00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:05,660
Madam Pompadour, come for her bag of
balls.
308
00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:09,390
Well, I can't go. I'm in the middle of a
stitch.
309
00:16:09,391 --> 00:16:11,919
There's someone at the door.
310
00:16:11,920 --> 00:16:14,810
Do you know, I thought there might be
when I heard the bell.
311
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:17,500
Oh, now, why did I say that?
312
00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:21,920
That was a strategic error. I should
have answered the door myself.
313
00:16:22,420 --> 00:16:24,600
Why? Well, he's got her to himself now.
314
00:16:24,980 --> 00:16:29,840
So? Well, ten minutes with him and we
know whose side she'll be on.
315
00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:31,840
His. She would be anyway.
316
00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:34,650
Now, that's fine by me. I don't want her
on my side.
317
00:16:34,820 --> 00:16:37,960
You may not want her. I mean, nobody
wants her.
318
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:41,840
But you'll need her. You need all the
help you can get.
319
00:16:42,180 --> 00:16:43,300
I suppose I do.
320
00:16:43,860 --> 00:16:47,460
You know, if this baby is born at
Christmas,
321
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:49,250
I could call him Noel.
322
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:51,140
And I was going to say Rudolph.
323
00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:55,130
Thank you, dear.
324
00:16:56,840 --> 00:16:57,920
Where are the others?
325
00:16:58,020 --> 00:16:59,100
In the lounge. Good.
326
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:01,520
Has Mrs Willis got my balls ready?
327
00:17:03,700 --> 00:17:08,539
I think so, but... Mum, Mum, before you
go in there... Yes, dear? Could we have
328
00:17:08,540 --> 00:17:11,670
a word on our own? A word on our own? Of
course, dear. What about?
329
00:17:11,700 --> 00:17:13,780
Well, it's about Angie and me.
330
00:17:13,781 --> 00:17:17,449
The thing is, I don't quite know how to
tell you this.
331
00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:19,490
Oh, my dear boy, say no more.
332
00:17:19,930 --> 00:17:23,310
I've always known this would happen.
I've always dreaded this day.
333
00:17:23,311 --> 00:17:24,828
What day?
334
00:17:24,829 --> 00:17:29,910
Oh, well, no use crying over spilt milk.
I want you to use my solicitor.
335
00:17:30,210 --> 00:17:35,210
He's very discreet and a whiz at
community property.
336
00:17:35,510 --> 00:17:37,310
Mother, we're not getting a divorce.
337
00:17:37,370 --> 00:17:38,510
Not? No.
338
00:17:38,890 --> 00:17:40,370
I see, a legal separation.
339
00:17:40,371 --> 00:17:43,069
Mother, we are not getting a legal
separation.
340
00:17:43,070 --> 00:17:44,450
We're very happily married.
341
00:17:44,451 --> 00:17:45,739
Oh.
342
00:17:45,740 --> 00:17:46,940
We were until yesterday.
343
00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:48,210
Ah.
344
00:17:48,211 --> 00:17:51,679
I wish I hadn't started all this. Look,
I just wanted to put you in the picture.
345
00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:52,760
We've had a bit of a row.
346
00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:54,220
I'm on your side.
347
00:17:54,221 --> 00:17:56,679
I don't know what the row's about yet.
348
00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:58,910
What possible difference could that
make?
349
00:17:59,340 --> 00:18:02,200
Well, I might be in the wrong. And pigs
might fly.
350
00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:06,640
Here. Take this, dear. What is it? Mr
Carew's card.
351
00:18:07,180 --> 00:18:08,340
You never knew.
352
00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:14,310
Look who's here.
353
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:15,780
I can see who's here.
354
00:18:15,781 --> 00:18:20,599
Good evening, Mrs Willis. Good evening,
Mrs Price. And before you say another
355
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,180
word, I'm on Angie's side.
356
00:18:23,100 --> 00:18:24,150
Ida.
357
00:18:24,500 --> 00:18:25,840
I thought you might be.
358
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:29,280
I'm on Robert's. Mother. I thought you
might be.
359
00:18:29,620 --> 00:18:31,100
Your balls are in this bag.
360
00:18:31,101 --> 00:18:36,759
Of course, you had to tell your mother
all about it, didn't you? I didn't tell
361
00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:40,579
her anything. Oh, come on. You weren't
out there for ten minutes admiring her
362
00:18:40,580 --> 00:18:41,630
out.
363
00:18:41,800 --> 00:18:42,850
Were you?
364
00:18:44,490 --> 00:18:46,830
No, he wasn't. I didn't think he could
be.
365
00:18:47,510 --> 00:18:49,550
It's obvious you told her we had a row.
366
00:18:49,551 --> 00:18:52,529
I did tell her that, yes, but I didn't
tell her what it was about.
367
00:18:52,530 --> 00:18:54,940
Oh, then how come she knows whose side
she's on?
368
00:18:55,390 --> 00:18:57,090
Maternal instinct, Mrs Willis.
369
00:18:58,230 --> 00:18:59,280
Balls, Mrs Willis?
370
00:19:02,250 --> 00:19:06,830
Well... That's what's in the bag.
371
00:19:07,710 --> 00:19:11,690
I'm sorry they're all dark colours, but
we had to keep the pastel shades back,
372
00:19:11,830 --> 00:19:13,250
didn't we, Ange? Yes.
373
00:19:13,740 --> 00:19:14,790
So I see.
374
00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:17,420
Tell me, dear, is that a balaclava?
375
00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:18,890
A what?
376
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:20,860
As a matter of fact, it's leggings.
377
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:22,800
But I'll take your point.
378
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,810
I suppose they're for Katie Ringwood's
baby.
379
00:19:26,860 --> 00:19:29,480
If you must know, they're for my baby.
380
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:31,300
Angie. Well, they are.
381
00:19:31,660 --> 00:19:32,710
Your baby?
382
00:19:34,060 --> 00:19:35,380
Oh, Angela, when is it due?
383
00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:39,660
Oh, you can rely on me for the pram. I
was going to do the pram.
384
00:19:40,140 --> 00:19:41,460
Never mind, we won't fight.
385
00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:43,060
I'll do the Moses basket.
386
00:19:43,320 --> 00:19:44,940
And I'll do the christening gown.
387
00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:46,580
But not the christening cake.
388
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:50,640
Mothers, there is no baby. There's not
going to be a baby. Not until 1987.
389
00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:52,540
But I want one now!
390
00:19:53,060 --> 00:19:56,280
Tough. What did he say?
391
00:19:56,660 --> 00:19:58,360
Tough. That's what he said.
392
00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:01,760
Tough. Oh, come to me, Angela.
393
00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:05,220
No, Angela, you come to me.
394
00:20:07,820 --> 00:20:09,200
But you're on my side.
395
00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:10,530
She switched.
396
00:20:11,860 --> 00:20:14,580
Never mind, Angela, if your mummies are
here.
397
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:21,010
Ida.
398
00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:22,610
Ida.
399
00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:26,980
Are you awake?
400
00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:28,490
Well, I am now.
401
00:20:29,580 --> 00:20:31,660
What's the matter? Is somebody ill?
402
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:34,000
No. Are we being burgled? No.
403
00:20:34,001 --> 00:20:35,219
Well, what's the matter?
404
00:20:35,220 --> 00:20:36,380
I can't get to sleep.
405
00:20:38,300 --> 00:20:40,520
Did you wake me up just to tell me that?
406
00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:43,080
Sorry. Oh, don't be.
407
00:20:43,320 --> 00:20:45,980
That's what mothers are for. Come on,
sit down.
408
00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:49,830
Are you warm enough? Do you want to tuck
your feet under the duvet?
409
00:20:50,700 --> 00:20:52,800
I'm fine. Right, then I'll begin.
410
00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:54,880
Bar, bar, black...
411
00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:01,100
I don't want a nursery rhyme.
412
00:21:01,140 --> 00:21:02,700
Oh, oh, right then.
413
00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:08,560
This little... Ida, I just want to talk.
414
00:21:08,820 --> 00:21:10,420
Oh, I know you do, really.
415
00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:14,360
I was just trying to make up for all
those lost years.
416
00:21:15,100 --> 00:21:16,400
You do that every day.
417
00:21:17,120 --> 00:21:18,170
Oh, Shane.
418
00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:21,200
What do you want to talk about?
419
00:21:22,580 --> 00:21:24,200
Well... Yes?
420
00:21:24,580 --> 00:21:27,050
I'm beginning to think that Angie might
be right.
421
00:21:27,051 --> 00:21:28,119
About the baby?
422
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:32,679
Mm. And here I've been lying awake till
turn two thinking she might be wrong. I
423
00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:36,679
mean, 1987's not that far off, is it?
No, but on the other hand, if we did
424
00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:39,739
a baby now... Then it wouldn't be you
waking me up at three o 'clock in the
425
00:21:39,740 --> 00:21:43,660
morning. I'd already be up in the
kitchen making up the four o 'clock
426
00:21:44,020 --> 00:21:47,700
We'll be on solids at six months. We'll
all be on solids at six months.
427
00:21:48,540 --> 00:21:50,900
Solids on the carpet, solids on the
floor.
428
00:21:51,980 --> 00:21:55,660
And worst of all...
429
00:21:56,120 --> 00:21:57,170
solids in your hair.
430
00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:00,400
That won't worry me.
431
00:22:00,620 --> 00:22:03,570
Oh, no, you won't be the one running
round with a damp cloth.
432
00:22:03,571 --> 00:22:07,179
Before you know where you are, we'll all
be playing football.
433
00:22:07,180 --> 00:22:11,759
When you say all... I don't believe in
only children. I was an only child, you
434
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:13,020
know. Yes, I do know.
435
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,380
Mind you, it was touch and go.
436
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:17,140
Ooh, I was out here.
437
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:21,400
I was measured for twins, and it took
two tape measures.
438
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,180
The twins ran in the family?
439
00:22:24,181 --> 00:22:27,149
Well, of course. Of course they do. Our
Wilfred's got two sets and their
440
00:22:27,150 --> 00:22:28,250
Maureen's got one.
441
00:22:28,610 --> 00:22:30,230
So why don't you might have twin?
442
00:22:30,830 --> 00:22:31,950
Rapunzel and Rudyard.
443
00:22:34,850 --> 00:22:36,470
I don't mind what they're called.
444
00:22:36,710 --> 00:22:39,010
Bubble and Squeak, if you like. I don't
like.
445
00:22:39,470 --> 00:22:40,520
Hey, Shane.
446
00:22:40,750 --> 00:22:43,370
What? You're really set on this now,
aren't you?
447
00:22:43,690 --> 00:22:47,120
Yeah. Thanks for making my mind up for
me. Well, I didn't know I had done.
448
00:22:47,121 --> 00:22:49,129
I'll be able to get to sleep now. Good
night.
449
00:22:49,130 --> 00:22:50,180
Night, night, Pat.
450
00:22:50,490 --> 00:22:51,550
Hey, no, then.
451
00:22:52,550 --> 00:22:53,600
Oh, my dear.
452
00:22:55,730 --> 00:22:59,650
Twins. Oh, well, double the trouble,
double the love.
453
00:23:06,590 --> 00:23:08,730
I'll never get back to sleep now.
454
00:23:10,170 --> 00:23:12,310
Oh, never mind.
455
00:23:15,950 --> 00:23:18,350
Bubble and squeak indeed.
456
00:23:25,911 --> 00:23:27,919
Good morning.
457
00:23:27,920 --> 00:23:29,920
Look how much I've done. Oh, very nice.
458
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,500
There's three for him and one for you.
459
00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:35,080
You look tired, Ida. Well, I might.
460
00:23:35,280 --> 00:23:38,560
How's his launch ship? I don't know. He
hasn't woken up yet.
461
00:23:38,561 --> 00:23:39,719
I'm not surprised.
462
00:23:39,720 --> 00:23:42,430
He was sitting on my bed at three o
'clock this morning.
463
00:23:42,431 --> 00:23:43,439
Whatever for?
464
00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:48,520
Well, it's not really my place to tell
you this, but I can't hold myself back.
465
00:23:49,460 --> 00:23:51,460
What would you say if I... Ida!
466
00:23:51,660 --> 00:23:53,040
What? Oh!
467
00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,340
Oh, don't say Katie Ringwood's had
another.
468
00:23:56,640 --> 00:23:58,320
I've got the most marvellous job.
469
00:23:58,560 --> 00:24:02,160
It was between Mitzi and me, but she's
having a baby, so I've got it.
470
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,220
Everybody's having babies.
471
00:24:04,600 --> 00:24:05,650
Except me, thank God.
472
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:07,320
Oh, I don't lose my bigger mouth.
473
00:24:07,420 --> 00:24:08,560
It's a year's contract.
474
00:24:09,180 --> 00:24:12,320
Beachwear. I love doing beachwear, and
the money's fantastic.
475
00:24:12,860 --> 00:24:17,240
Yeah, but what about... Oh, I'd
forgotten that.
476
00:24:17,900 --> 00:24:19,460
Oh, Robert's right.
477
00:24:19,700 --> 00:24:20,780
That can wait.
478
00:24:20,980 --> 00:24:22,030
Till when?
479
00:24:22,100 --> 00:24:23,150
Autumn 87.
480
00:24:23,950 --> 00:24:26,770
I'm sorry, Ida. I must weigh myself.
481
00:24:27,250 --> 00:24:28,390
Oh, dearie me.
482
00:24:30,370 --> 00:24:31,420
Shane, love.
483
00:24:32,530 --> 00:24:33,580
Shane?
484
00:24:33,990 --> 00:24:36,830
I heard. Oh, I'm ever so sorry.
485
00:24:37,470 --> 00:24:39,690
Well... Try not to be too disappointed.
486
00:24:40,270 --> 00:24:43,930
Yeah. I suppose I'd better put this away
then, hadn't I?
487
00:24:44,290 --> 00:24:45,510
Not too far away.
488
00:24:45,750 --> 00:24:46,800
Why not?
489
00:24:46,810 --> 00:24:48,230
Well, mistakes can happen.
490
00:24:52,111 --> 00:24:54,209
You wouldn't.
491
00:24:54,210 --> 00:24:58,760
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