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Here we are, big, big, the Tucker Silver School.
Open, fine, two of a kind.
Making it go, making it grow.
Together, we're going to find our way.
Together, taking the time to stay.
To learn all about those things you just can't find.
Two silver spoons together.
You ask again.
Are we today, son?
Yeah, I overslept. Again?
Maybe when your alarm goes off, you shouldn't just hit the snooze bar.
I know, Dad. I know.
You know, I read an article about this very thing.
You know what the number one cause of lateness is in America?
Fatherly lectures.
Go to school.
Kate!
What kept you?
I don't know. I feel so creaky.
I hope I'm not coming down with a cold. Ah, ah, ah, ah. You don't say, I hope
I'm not coming down with a cold. You say, I am not coming down with a cold.
Come on, honey, say it.
Please, Edward.
It's a case of mind over matter. Say it.
It's a case of mind over matter.
Not that. I am not coming down with a cold.
All right. I am not coming down with a cold.
Good.
1906, 1944.
Anyone?
Anyone else?
Okay, Stratton.
D -Day, invasion of France. Very good.
Codename.
Let's give someone else a chance, shall we?
Alfonso.
No, no, that's okay. I don't mind.
Alfonso, codename.
Operation Overdrive.
Rick? Operation Overlord.
That was close.
All right, does anyone know the size and magnitude of this operation?
Brad?
Uh, big.
A little more specific.
Looks like it's just you and me, Stratton.
There was one million troops, 4 ,000 landing crafts, 800 warships, and 11
planes. Like I said, big.
I hope your sense of humor is still with you after the test on Thursday.
How can I learn all this stuff by Thursday?
You know, it's funny you should ask.
I was just...
Yes, sir. You think you could fill the rest of the class in on the Battle of
Bulge?
All right, all right. Settle down.
Would you care to share with the rest of the class today's excuse for being
late, Mr.
Fontaine?
I fell asleep in the whirlpool.
I'd still be there, but the bubbles went up my nose.
All right, all right. Settle down.
Settle down.
This is a history class, not a locker room.
That's funny. They both smell the same.
Don't forget, Thursday.
I saw you and Jody whispering. What'd you say?
Oh, she's worried about the history test.
Well, you can teach her a little history. Maybe she can teach you a
biology.
Stratton. Could I speak to you?
Uh -oh. See you at Berger's.
Yes, sir.
Obviously, you're ready for Thursday's exam.
Oh, absolutely.
Well, one of your classmates isn't.
Really? Yeah, I thought maybe you'd like to do a little tutoring.
Sure, I'd love to.
Oh, and I'll have Bronco get in touch with you. Great.
Bronco.
You didn't have to drive me home.
I could have taken a cab.
You said you were too weak to dial the phone.
I look awful.
What happened to mind over matter?
Come on, say it. I am not coming down with a cold.
I am not coming down with a cold. Good.
It's the flu.
Look, if you feel that bad, maybe you should go to bed.
No, no. Oh, I'll be okay.
Are you sure?
Honey, I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself.
Oh. Would you put my feet up for me?
Oh, honey.
Oh.
Is there anything else I can do for you? No.
I'm just going to sit here and watch TV.
Oh, can't you do that, dear?
Would you hand me the remote control?
Look, I've got to get back to the office.
I hope you feel better. You're not going to leave me alone.
I'll be back as soon as I can, I promise.
Oh, besides, Rick will be home soon.
Good. I like Rick.
Unless he stops off at burgers.
You can't stop off at burgers!
I'm sick.
And General Know -It -All himself.
Very funny, Brad.
What did Burton want?
Burton's decided to enforce the school rules. If a player fails a test, he
play a varsity sport.
So? So Bronco may not be playing Saturday, guys.
They can't do that. Yeah, Saturday's game is for the championship.
Without Bronco, we're sunk.
Bummer.
It's worse than that. He wants me to tutor him.
Wait, what'd you say?
I said Burton wants me to help Bronco study for the test.
What are we getting so upset about, guys?
We got General Patton himself.
Two to the bronze.
Yeah, I mean, the championship is in the bag.
No, I wouldn't say... Did you hear that, everybody?
Brad, don't say... Thanks to Rick here, we're going to be the Long Island
football champs. Come on, let's hear it for Rick Stratton, huh?
Hip, hip!
Hey, Bronco.
Hey.
Yo, Stratton.
Yeah, Bronco.
Mr. Burton says you're going to tutor me in history?
Yeah, you know, I'm going to try.
What time am I supposed to show up at your house?
Let's say seven.
You got it.
World War II, here we come.
Yeah. Yeah, right.
In Bronco, we're going to start in with Mussolini. Hey, let him get his own
tutor.
You're all mine.
Yeah, right. And Bronco, we'll talk about it tonight.
Okay. Teach.
Just remember, Rick.
Bronco doesn't pass a test. We don't win the championship.
That's right.
Whole school's counting on you, Rick. At last, we're gonna have something to put
in our trophy case.
Yeah.
Stratton's head if he messes up.
Kate!
I made you some nice soft -boiled eggs.
Soft -boiled eggs?
And it's a nice, dry toilet.
Now, if you need anything, I'll be right inside.
Kate? Hmm?
Can I have a cup of tea?
Oh, sure.
With two tea bags?
Two tea bags?
Of course.
Could you put it in my Mickey Mantle mug?
and a cookie
you shouldn't be up.
Hey, Teach. Hey, Bronc.
So you're the local luminary.
Luma what?
Hey, Bronco, this is my father.
Oh, hello, Mr. Stratton. You look terrible.
Thank you, Bronco. No, I don't want to give germs to the buckaroo's leading
scorer before the big game.
Oh, hey, that's okay. I never get sick.
I had a St. Bernard like that.
I'm going to bed.
Rick, would you tell Kate to bring my tea and my special mug upstairs?
Your Mickey Mantle mug?
And, Rick, tell her not to forget my cookie.
Okay, Dad.
I like you.
Little Bronco.
Are you ready to hit the old book?
Why not?
Not much else I can do with him.
Oh, come on, Bronco. That's not a very good attitude.
I can't help it.
The only test I ever passed was my physical.
Kate was my number one patient.
You went to bed. Kate, I want you to meet Bronco.
Kate!
Excuse me, I'm the only nurse on duty.
Hey, that's a good -looking nurse.
No, you see, Bronco came as my stepmother.
Why'd she say she was a nurse?
Because my dad isn't feeling well, and she's... Never mind.
Okay, Bronco, let's begin. Now, why don't you tell me what you know about
War II?
Well, it came after World War I.
Okay.
That's a start.
Um, let me ask you a few more general questions.
Oh, you mean like General Patton?
Yeah, like General Patton. What do you know about General Patton? Well, he was
real tough general.
And he wore these pearl -handled revolvers.
Go on.
And he shot a plane down with a gun.
Good. And he slapped a soldier right in the face.
Yeah, and then the movie ended.
Okay, Bronco.
The name of the country Germany invaded first.
The name of the country that Germany invaded first is a country
that is known for many things, including being the country that Germany invaded
first.
You have no idea, do you? None.
DeBronco, we're running out of time. We've been studying for three nights.
test is tomorrow.
Oh, it's the youth, Rick.
I'm never going to get it.
If it's not football, I can't learn it.
I'm beginning to agree with you.
Hey, hold on a minute.
DeBronco, I've been going at this all wrong.
No wonder I'm not learning anything.
Look, DeBronco, help me put that table on the sofa.
Sure.
What are we doing?
We're having a little history lesson, football style.
Now, look, the field you're playing on is Europe.
That's a big field.
Yeah, you're not kidding. Now, look, you're Germany, and you're on the
You've already wiped out Austria and Czechoslovakia. I did? They didn't even
show up.
Oh, you mean they forfeited?
Yeah, yeah, you could say that.
Now, look, you're playing Poland. They've got a lot of high school spirit,
they're no match for Germany.
That's because we got spikes on our helmets.
Bronco, that was World War I. They're no match because they're undersized.
Oh, then I'll stick to the ground attack. Roll right over you.
Blue 44, 26, 33, set, hut, hut!
Good, good.
That's exactly what Germany did.
Except they weren't so rough.
That's called the Blitzkrieg. Oh, the Blitz!
That's when you rush in extra guys before they know it. That's right. Only
were tanks.
And you win. Hey, I'm starting to like history. Who do I play next?
France. And this time, it's the playoffs.
Please be careful with that.
I never fumble.
I'm going to roll right over you again. No, not this time, because I've got a
great defense called the Maginot Line.
Ooh.
Come on, say it.
Mag... You know, a line. Good, good. I mean, this is really a line, Bronco. I
mean, fortified tunnels, concrete walls, big guns.
Bronco, these guys are immovable.
Then there's only one way.
What? The old end run.
Yes, yes.
Only first you gotta slip by Denmark.
Then you break attack with Holland.
Then you sidearm Belgium.
Into the secretary, France, into Paris.
Touchdown! All right!
I didn't see it with my own eyes. I wouldn't believe it.
Hey, guys. Hey, way to go.
Oh, Brad, come on. I've been tutoring.
He did it, Rick.
You mean Bronco passed?
Hey, he didn't just pass.
He got 100.
100? Hey,
guys. How'd we do?
There it is.
100.
Stratton.
92? Hey,
partner.
We did it, huh?
You brought go 100?
Yeah.
You could have gotten 102 if you were as lucky as me.
Bronco, what do you mean lucky?
I just happened to be looking through Mr. Burton's wastebasket and I found a
copy of the questions to the history test.
What? Talk about luck, huh?
But, Bronco, that's cheating.
Shh. That's loud.
You think I want the whole school to know?
Yeah, but, Bronco... I gotta get to practice. We're gonna win the
Yeah, Bronco, what if someone finds out?
Who's gonna tell?
Hi,
Dad. Hi, son. How'd it go?
Did Bronco pass?
Pass? He got 100.
Out of what?
Out of 100.
Well, Rick, that's terrific.
I guess it was worth an antique vase.
There's just one little thing, Dad.
What's that?
See, Bronco didn't get 100 because of my help. He cheated.
That's a pretty serious accusation. You have any proof?
He told me.
That's pretty good proof.
Dad, I don't know what to do. What if the teacher finds out?
This teacher's name wouldn't be Mr. Burton by any chance.
Yeah, why?
Called about an hour ago. He wants to see you before class tomorrow.
You see, Dad, he's got to know that Bronco cheated. And I bet you he thinks
helped him cheat.
You didn't. Of course I didn't. But what do I do if Burton asks if I know about
the cheating?
Well, you're not going to help Bronco any by covering up for him.
Dad, it's not that simple.
If I tell Burton he'll keep Bronco out of the game, we'll lose the championship
and the kids will blame me.
So what's the worst that could happen? They hang you in effigy?
No, they could hang me in person.
Hey, Rick.
Got the call, too, huh?
Yeah, I got the call.
You know, Bronco, why did you do it?
I mean, you were really beginning to learn about World War II.
You knew the names of some of the battles.
some of the generals, even some of the countries.
You know, Bronco, if they asked the right questions, with a little bit of
you could have gotten at least a D.
Just saying that.
Bronco, we're in big trouble.
Why? Maybe Burton just wants to congratulate us.
Gentlemen, cheaters never win, and winners never cheat.
Sit.
All right, I'm going to ask this question once and once only. I want to
makeup exam.
What?
That's over.
Well, this is a first. I've never had a student get 100 on an exam and ask to
take it over.
Mr. Burton, I think Bronco here wants to clear up any lingering doubts in your
mind as to the validity of his grade.
Yeah, I want to do what he said.
I think it's an excellent idea.
Yeah, how about an oral exam?
Well, if he did pass, it certainly could get me off the hook.
You remember what happened last year during the basketball playoffs?
When everyone was mad at you for not letting our star center play?
Yeah, the obscene phone calls were bad enough, but then when they let the air
out of my tires... Some kids are really dumb.
What kids? It was the teachers.
So, Bronco can take the makeup test?
He can take the makeup test.
All right.
All right.
Ready, Mr.
Fontaine? Hit me with your best shot.
Yes.
All right.
Question number one.
Who was the German commander of the Afrika Korps?
The offensive coach.
Easy. That was Rommel.
All right. How about the minister of propaganda?
The what?
The head cheerleader.
Joseph Goebbels.
Excellent, excellent. Now, let's move on to the Battle of the
Bulge. Great, the Super Bowl.
Blue, body, bow!
Hey, Coke's for everyone. All right. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
I just want to say thanks to my tutor, Rick Stratton.
Without him, I never could have gone from 100 on my test all the way to a 66.
Thanks, Bronco.
Listen, Rick, I want you to have this.
Hey, but, Bronco, this is the game ball.
They gave it to you for scoring five touchdowns. Keep it.
I'll be getting lots more when I go to Harvard.
Hey, group.
Look at this, Dad. Bronco gave me the game ball.
Congratulations to both of you. Hey, thanks.
You sure look a lot better, Mr. Stratton. Sure feel a lot better.
Mr.
Stratton doesn't.
Come in, honey.
I'm bringing you some nice soft -boiled eggs and some nice dry toast.
You know, you're a really good history teacher, Rick.
Thanks. Um, how are you at biology?
Good. Are you kidding? Great. It's my favorite subject.
Oh, so, um, maybe you'd be free for a session then?
You bet.
Great.
Franco! Franco, honey! Rick said he'd be happy to tutor you in biology.
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