Original subtitles

Here we are, face to face, sucking on a silver spoon.

Hoping to find we're two of a kind.

Making it go, making it grow. Together, we're going to find our

way.

Together, taking the time each day.

To learn all about those things you just can't buy.

Two silver spoons together.

You and I together.

We're gonna find our way.

You and I together.

We're gonna find our way.

You and I together.

Eddie Toys is going to distribute these. They're for people who like to go

jogging in the rain.

That's pretty awesome, but why not add an automatic defogger?

Come on, that'd be silly.

Dad, remember I told you that Leslie's coming over tonight?

Uh -huh, you're going to rehearse that play she wrote for drama class, right?

Yeah, well, I'm kind of worried that her play is going to have a lot of mushy

stuff in it.

I mean, she's head over heels in love with me. She worships the ground I walk

on.

So you shouldn't say things like that.

I didn't say them, Dad.

She did.

Well, have you tried telling her that you just don't feel the same way about

that she does about you?

Not exactly. Well, it's hard to say that to a girl who thinks you're a Greek

god.

She said that, too?

No.

That one she wrote on the blackboard.

That's probably her.

Yeah.

Whoopee.

Come on, be nice.

Hi, Ricky.

Hello, Leslie.

She's dropping me off.

Hi, I'm... Veronica.

Edward!

Hello!

I'm going to take a wild guess here.

You guys know each other?

Oh, son, this is Veronica Woosterman.

I thought she was Veronica Cranbottom.

Woosterman was her maiden name. Then she married my dad and became a Cranbottom.

I can't believe... When Edward and I were college, we spent a summer as camp

counselors. He was working at a boys' camp on one side of the lake, and I was

working at a girls' camp on the other side.

Do you want to start rehearsing my play?

Okay. Dad, we'll be in the library.

Hmm? Oh!

Okay, son.

If you want, you can use the library.

Isn't it weird that my mom knows your dad?

How do you like my dress?

How do you like the color?

My mom's intuition told me you prefer me in red.

Was I right?

Right.

I look at you and I see red.

Let's start rehearsing your play.

Okay. This is the first play I've ever written, but I must admit it's

Here.

Love gets a nose job.

By Leslie Ann Cranbottom.

What's it about?

Okay. It's about a brilliant plastic surgeon who is loved and adored by a

big -nosed patient.

I guess I don't mind playing the doctor.

I'm playing the doctor, Rick.

Don't be sexist.

But, Leslie, it doesn't make sense for me to be the patient.

I don't have a particularly big nose.

You do now.

You know, I still remember how run down those buildings were.

Every cabin leaked a camp Wumpa Gump.

Yeah, but it's the same for us guys on our side of the lake. At least you had a

neat Indian name like Wumpa Gump.

I remember being very embarrassed to tell people I was a counselor at Camp Al

Bernstein.

Do you remember how we first met?

How could I forget?

It was after dinner one night.

A sumptuous feast of soggy toast covered with cream chip God knows what.

And I decided to take a swim out to the diving platform in the middle of the

lake. And I was already on the diving platform.

I looked out and I saw you swimming toward me. I remember thinking...

Oh, gee, I'm all alone. What if he makes a pass at me?

Then I got a good look at you, and I thought, gee, I hope he makes a pass at

But, oh, no, you were a perfect gentleman, very charming and polite and

impressive with a name like Edward Stratton III. I mean, I had met a second

before, but never a third.

What about you? You introduced yourself as Tuesday Woosterman.

I was a big fan of Tuesday. Well, then.

So was I.

For the rest of that summer, we were together every possible moment.

Yeah.

I was very much in love with you.

And I was you.

Well... It's been a long time.

Yeah, a lot of water under the old diving platform.

So,

Mr. Stratford...

want me to give you a nose job?

Yes, Doctor.

And by the way, you're gorgeous.

I know.

Listen, you sure need to fix your schnoz.

I don't want to be rude, but that's the biggest honker I've ever seen.

It's true my nose is embarrassingly big, but there's nothing wrong with my eyes.

I can't take them off you, you incredibly beautiful creature.

Well, come back in an hour and I'll operate on you.

Bye. Bye.

Doctor, I've got a confession to make.

I've fallen deeply in love with you?

Why am I cursed with this legendary gorgeousness?

need fall hopelessly in love with me.

Why?

Why?

Why?

You got me.

So I married Leslie's father because I wanted stability and security.

He shampoos rugs and he's an expert at it.

Well, it's good clean living.

True. But we had trouble communicating.

I wanted to talk Michelangelo versus Rodin.

And he wanted to talk Shag versus Deep Pile.

Personally, I go with Rodin and Deep Pile.

Finally, we divorced.

He kept the business, I kept the house. And twice a year, he steams the carpet.

Since then, I've dated occasionally.

Nothing serious. What about you?

Are you, uh, involved?

Yes. Her name's Kate Summer. She's my personal assistant.

Oh, accent on personal?

Yeah.

Kate is bright, pretty, sensitive, caring.

Did I mention bright and pretty?

Edward, it's been 15 years.

Have you thought about me?

Not really.

Well... Occasionally.

Twice a week, tops.

Uh, look... Edward, what we had was special and it ended far too soon.

I've always felt that if fate ever brought us together again, we would

part.

Listen, Veronica, what we had was very special, and it was a long time

ago. And now I really am very much in love with...

Kate.

Thank you.

Anyway, I hope you understand.

Oh, I understand.

But I think it's only fair to warn you.

I'm not giving up.

Oh, I wish you would.

Hi,

Kate!

Kate!

Whoa! Hi, Kate.

This is Kate Summers. This is Veronica Cranbrottom. Oh, a pleasure to meet you.

Yeah. Veronica is Leslie's mother.

Edward, aren't you leaving something out?

No, I don't think so. No.

Edward and I are old friends.

Oh, how nice.

Old friends. Very.

We were both camp counselors one summer.

We were very young.

Very young.

We had a mad, passionate summer romance.

Well, Veronica, now Edward is having a mad, passionate summer's romance.

Yes, he told me.

I think I'd better be leaving now.

Leslie!

Yes, Mother?

Come on, honey, it's time for us to go.

But we're still rehearsing. Well, you can finish rehearsing tomorrow.

Bye, Ricky.

Bye!

Show business is my life.

Kate, honey, darling.

I stopped off at the video store and I rented us a copy of Superman 3. Hey,

great.

Maybe I should have also gotten us a copy of Same Time Next Year.

Kate,

listen.

Maybe I should explain the way things were between me and...

Veronica? Thank you.

She's very pretty.

Oh, is she?

I didn't notice.

She has lovely green eyes. Blue.

Not blue.

Orange?

Pink. Well, like I said, I didn't notice.

Why do I feel so guilty? I haven't done anything.

I know you haven't done anything.

So why am I so worried?

Kate.

My relationship with Veronica was a long time ago.

And I'm with you now.

You're all I want.

Thank you.

That's exactly what I needed to hear.

Your butler let me in. Oh, well, what are you doing here?

I mean, it's nice to see you, but what are you doing here?

I'm sorry.

What I mean to say is, what are you doing here?

Last night when I went home, I found the diary I kept of our summer together.

Look what I wrote.

Dear diary, I could just die. I looked in the mirror this morning and saw a

on my upper lip.

That's the wrong entry. Listen.

July 28th. Dear diary, today Edward and I had a picnic by the lake. We sipped

wine, held each other, and Edward said that in the history of the world, no two

people were ever more in love.

Refresh my memory. Did I say that before or after I accidentally sat in a potato

salad?

Before. Ah.

Edward.

In honor of that occasion, I thought that maybe we should have a picnic.

right here, right now.

Right here?

Right now? Sure, why not? For old time's sake. Well, Veronica, I don't...

Surprise. I had to go to three stores, but I finally found the same Chinese

we had 15 years ago.

Wow.

Ding Hoi wine.

Good year, too.

Year of the dog.

What it comes down to is I just... I

just can't say the lines you've written for me. At least not in

public. And besides, the fake nose you gave me accidentally got flushed down

toilet.

Forget the play, Ricky.

I want to talk to you about your dad and my mom.

What about them? They used to be in love with each other.

Come on. Yeah.

Get out of here. Really?

You're lying.

I swear.

When they were camp counselors, they had romantic summer slings. Listen,

Veronica, I think it's great that you tried to make this picnic, but I don't

want to lead you on. I have to be honest with you and tell you... Yes?

I hate potato salad.

Look.

Here's a picture of your dad kissing my mom.

All I see is the back of a guy's head. That could be anybody.

Here's a picture of my mom kissing your dad.

All I see is the back of a lady's head. That could be anybody.

Here's another one.

Okay, so they were in love.

That was a long time ago.

My dad's in love with Kate now.

Not for long.

What is that supposed to mean?

My mother told me she was going to get your father back.

And my mother always gets what she wants.

So after they get married... Married?

Sure.

If I were your father, I'd start looking for a good caterer.

But what about Kate?

If I were her, I'd start looking for a good singles bar.

I just thought of something really awful.

What?

Oh, well.

C 'est la vie.

What is it?

Well, you see, if your mom marries my dad, that'll make you my stepsister.

We won't be able to get married.

I've got to talk to my mom about this.

She's ruining my whole future.

Bye.

Bye, Leslie. Bye.

Hi, Ricky.

Hi, Kate.

Kate?

Yeah? Can I talk to you for a second?

You want a bite of my chocolate turtle?

Hey, why are you eating this junk?

Do you want to get fat?

Ricky, I'm not getting fat.

Am I getting fat?

I'm getting fat.

No, you're not fat, but you can't afford to get fat.

You could just be three chocolate turtles away from a singles bar.

Ricky, what are you talking about?

Sit down, Kate.

I've got some bad news.

But I'm counting on you to be strong.

Can you be strong, Kate?

I'll try.

My dad used to be in love with another woman.

Here's a picture of him kissing her.

All I see is the back of a guy's head. It could be anybody.

Here, let me show you.

Ricky, I already know about your father and Leslie's mother.

You do?

How come you're so calm?

I know.

You've hired a hitman, right?

Of course not.

Well, I'm calm because I know that Edward loves me now.

Don't be cocky, Kate.

Leslie told me that her mother's out to get my dad, and I'm real worried.

Those cramp -bottom women are capable of anything.

Well, I'm not worried.

Honest.

She's a flash from my dad's past.

Well, I'm a flash from his present.

Ricky, I'm secure with my relationship with your father.

I'd never do anything to hurt it.

And I know in my heart he'd never do anything either.

Kate always sees the back of a guy's head.

Together, taking the time to stay.