Original subtitles

Here we are, face to face, looking for the silver spoon.

Open to find, we're two of a kind.

Making it go, making it grow. Together, we're going to find our

way.

Together, taking the time each day.

To learn all about those things you just can't buy.

Two silver spoons together.

You and I together.

We're gonna find our way.

You and I together.

We're gonna find our way.

You and I together.

ask you ten times before you go to sleep.

Yeah, well, I'm really bushed.

Wiped out.

Sandman city.

Well, want me to tuck you in?

No, no.

No, I'm too old for that, Dad.

I'm into self -tucking.

That's no fair. I've only had a son for two months and already he's a self

-tucker.

Well, sweet dreams, son.

Bye, Dad.

Good night.

Mr. Bradshaw saw him in the cemetery last night. He told me and Dirk what he

looked like.

Rick, don't you find it a little hard to believe that a primitive half -man,

half -beast would be hanging around our neighborhood?

But, Dad, Mr. Bradshaw actually saw it.

He said it was 14 feet tall, covered with hair, and had big fangs.

Uh -oh, my first blind date is back in town.

Dad, Mr. Bradshaw saw it with his own eyes.

Well, Rick, consider the source.

Mr. Bradshaw isn't known as Weird Willie for nothing, you know.

Last year he dressed himself up in colored lights and told everybody he was

Christmas tree.

Sam, Mr. Bradshaw is not the only person who's seen him. Other people have, too.

Just wait. Someday someone is going to get a picture of Big Toast. And then

people are going to have to believe in him.

Well, maybe so.

But maybe it's one of those unsolvable mysteries like the Loch Ness Monster.

or the disappearance of Amelia Earhart, or why all waitresses call you honey.

Good night, son.

Night, Dad.

Maybe not to you, but from this side of the headstone is hilarious.

Come on, we're here on a mission.

We're supposed to be looking for big toes.

Hey, while we're waiting, let's switch some of these headstones around.

That way when people come here, they'll be mourning the wrong dead guy.

Sheriff, you're too young to be this sick.

Look at this.

Footprints.

Wow. Gee, I never saw a footprint like that.

Neither have I.

This will make Dr. Scholl wake up screaming.

Derek, Big Toe made these tracks.

Big Toe's was here, and there's a good chance he'll come back.

Get down and wait for him.

of an old movie I saw called Curse of the Avenging Corpse.

It was about this guy who knew he was going to die, but he swore he could not

from the grave.

And then one night, the murderer came to the cemetery to gloat.

And while he was standing over the grave, the ground opened up, and a

decomposed hand reached up and grabbed him.

I'm all to you. Come on.

Wonder why he's out here in the cemetery all by himself.

Hey, he could escape from a zoo or a circus.

What's your name, fella?

What's your name?

Expect him to answer that? Who's the monkey here?

All right, but then we'll pick a name.

How about Fred?

No, he doesn't like that.

Well, how about Bob?

Yeah, it is a little boring.

Bruce. I know.

Harry.

Well, then Harry it is.

Well, it sure does fit.

Harry, you want to come home with me?

Go home with you? Why should he go home with you? We both saw him at the same

time, right?

Yeah, but Harry likes me.

Oh, yeah, but Harry likes me, too.

Don't you, Harry?

Look, Rick, it's important that I take Harry home with me tonight.

What do you mean important?

I got this plan. I'm going to put Harry in a nightgown and slip him into my

father's bed.

I'm curious to see if my old man notices anything different.

Forget it, Derek.

Harry needs love, food, warmth.

Right, Harry?

Well, he really needs a good orthodontist.

Well, I guess it's time to say goodbye.

So long, monkey.

Nice blanket.

What do you want to do now? Play a game or something?

Do you play catch?

Do you roller skate?

What's the matter, guy?

Did you eat a bad banana?

miss your family, huh?

I know how that feels.

I never really had a family until I came to live with my dad.

But you can be part of my family, okay?

So come on.

Let's see that famous Harry smile.

Let's play some Cowboys and Indians.

I only had a gerbil and a hamster, and they both died.

Oh, no, don't worry.

They died of old age.

Ricky, can I come in?

Just a second, Kate.

I'm wrapping your birthday present.

You've got to hide.

Ricky, you've been in your room all morning.

What's going on? Nothing.

You're right, Kate. I really should get out of my room. Come on, let's go.

Who's in the bathroom?

Oh, nobody's. See, the john keeps flushing by itself.

It's terrible, Kate. It kept me up all night.

I read about it. It's called spontaneous flushing.

Someone's in the bathroom. Who?

It's a surprise. I'll be right down and tell you all about it, okay?

Oh.

Sounds mysterious.

No big deal.

Spontaneous gargling?

Keep the toothbrush.

article in my school newspaper.

It said that having a pet is very healthy for a person. It lowers your

pressure, helps prevent threat and loneliness.

And they also found that a lot of psychotic killers did not have a pet

were my age.

I'm going to take a wild stab here, Rick.

Do you want a pet?

You and Derek were in a cemetery last night? I thought you were asleep.

But, Dad... Ricky, you know better than that. It's dangerous to go out alone at

night.

Danger's nice.

I bet he escaped from the, uh, ZOO.

anybody else.

Well, Ricky, Harry's... Uh, would you excuse us for a moment, Harry?

Ricky,

I only had one semester of zoology, but I'm pretty positive that orangutans

aren't native to Long Island.

Some of them must belong to somebody.

I sure wish I could keep him.

Ricky's a wild animal. There's nothing for an orangutan to do around this

Of course, he could adapt.

The zoo's not missing any orangutans.

Then can I keep him?

Uh, now, Ricky, maybe he belongs to somebody who loves him just as much as

do.

We're gonna have to put some ads in the paper and see if anybody claims it.

If nobody claims him, then can I keep him?

Well... Wouldn't you like to live here with us, Harry?

Well, okay, in that case, Nobody responds.

Mr. Nice Guy.

my puppy. We do an act together.

My name is Robert Geraldo of Geraldo and Puppy.

Okay, Puppy and Geraldo.

Mister, are you sure this is your orangutan?

Well, of course. We do a magic act.

Observe. Hey, I will take this orange here. I'm going to throw it up in the

and it's going to end up right here on this monkey's face.

One, two, and up. Close enough. Now for the magic.

Puppy was gone.

Oh, you've been worried sick.

Yeah, I couldn't sleep. See, puppy is like my own son.

Before you leave, could I say goodbye to puppy?

Well, of course. Puppy, go out there. Go out there with your girlfriend. Go.

Well, I guess you got to leave now, huh?

I'm sure I'm glad you found your family.

Mr. Geraldo seems like a real nice guy.

I'm sure I'm glad to know that you're in good hands.

Boy, we had some laughs, didn't we?

Let me just tell you, you can always come back here.

My window is always open.

I'm going to miss you.

I love you, Harry.

Here we are, face to face, a couple of silver spoons.

Hoping to find we're two of a kind.

Make it a call, make it a call together.