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1
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:49,840
Okay.
2
00:01:17,140 --> 00:01:18,740
with the long story.
3
00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:25,760
I'm sorry. I thought you were my long
-lost son who I haven't seen since
4
00:01:25,760 --> 00:01:26,760
breakfast.
5
00:01:27,620 --> 00:01:28,620
Oh.
6
00:01:29,300 --> 00:01:34,320
I made the matzo ball soup just the way
you told me, and it's delicious.
7
00:01:34,920 --> 00:01:38,040
If you don't have trouble with gas, it's
delicious.
8
00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:45,640
It's so delicious, I was hoping that you
and your sister would change your mind.
9
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:34,940
I love doing it for you.
10
00:02:35,420 --> 00:02:38,560
And it's fun cooking for the Jewish
family.
11
00:03:03,820 --> 00:03:05,880
on her death was found to have no brain.
12
00:03:08,140 --> 00:03:11,940
And just before she died, they elected
her to Congress from Nebraska.
13
00:03:17,420 --> 00:03:21,640
I told Rabbi Jacobs about our first
Shabbat dinner. He said you're a
14
00:03:21,640 --> 00:03:22,640
lady.
15
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:25,840
Did you tell him that she was gonna...
16
00:03:53,160 --> 00:03:54,300
That's kind of a record for you.
17
00:03:57,220 --> 00:03:59,360
Don't the table look pretty?
18
00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:03,920
Well, I think it's too much fuss, you
know. I mean, they had to roll all the
19
00:04:03,920 --> 00:04:06,800
fancy dishes in the glasses. All for
you, kiddo.
20
00:04:08,300 --> 00:04:11,700
I wrote out a Jewish prayer for you to
say at dinner, Uncle Archie. Hold it,
21
00:04:11,700 --> 00:04:15,120
hold it, hold it. A Jewish prayer for me
to say? I ain't gonna do that.
22
00:04:17,779 --> 00:04:21,680
Well, come on, will you? I mean, if the
Lord up there was to hear Archie Bunker
23
00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:22,680
saying a Jewish prayer.
24
00:04:23,440 --> 00:04:25,220
You'd think I was pulling some kind of a
fast one.
25
00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:27,580
Please, Uncle Art.
26
00:04:28,580 --> 00:04:29,020
Would
27
00:04:29,020 --> 00:04:35,720
you
28
00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:38,760
kindly explain to her why she mustn't?
29
00:04:58,250 --> 00:05:01,150
You'll learn this crap polar very young.
30
00:05:02,850 --> 00:05:04,630
All right, all right, all right.
31
00:05:05,050 --> 00:05:09,050
All right, all right, all right. I'll
say it, but I draw the line at wearing
32
00:05:09,050 --> 00:05:10,050
of them beanies.
33
00:05:10,470 --> 00:05:13,370
Don't, don't, don't. Stop that. Stop
that.
34
00:05:15,250 --> 00:05:16,250
Here's the book.
35
00:05:19,670 --> 00:05:22,730
Well, what the hell did they do? Set it
to music?
36
00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:30,360
sing it in that need.
37
00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:36,020
Oh, I'll get it. I'll get it. I'll get
it. I'll get it.
38
00:05:36,580 --> 00:05:38,120
Hold it. Hold it. Hold it. Stop.
39
00:05:38,460 --> 00:05:40,480
Don't open that. Don't open that.
40
00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:45,860
Gee, the way the two of yous race over
to that door.
41
00:05:46,320 --> 00:05:49,860
Every time the bell rings in this house,
yous two make it look like a jailbreak.
42
00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:30,270
Archie Bunker. Hello.
43
00:06:31,050 --> 00:06:32,430
Hi, hi, hi.
44
00:06:32,830 --> 00:06:34,750
Uh, that's hello in Gentile.
45
00:06:35,070 --> 00:06:39,010
Nice to meet you, Mr. Bunker. Oh, well,
hey, likewise, I'm sure.
46
00:06:41,950 --> 00:06:44,750
To the hostess, tweet to the tweet.
47
00:06:45,090 --> 00:06:48,710
Oh, Murray, thank you.
48
00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:50,430
You should know.
49
00:06:50,770 --> 00:06:51,769
What do you mean?
50
00:06:51,770 --> 00:06:54,950
Sure he should. And while he was at it,
he should have brought something for the
51
00:06:54,950 --> 00:06:55,950
host, too, huh?
52
00:07:04,460 --> 00:07:07,580
Get out of there. Get out of there.
That's for the young lady here. Oh,
53
00:07:07,580 --> 00:07:09,360
you. Yeah, no, not there, love.
54
00:07:09,700 --> 00:07:11,300
Go to the chairs, huh?
55
00:07:11,540 --> 00:07:12,540
Okay, that's fine.
56
00:07:14,640 --> 00:07:15,640
So,
57
00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:22,520
uh, how long have you two been, uh, what
do you call, uh, together?
58
00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:24,360
Oh, gee.
59
00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:31,680
We've been dating for three months.
60
00:07:36,490 --> 00:07:37,590
past the awkward state.
61
00:07:39,750 --> 00:07:40,750
That's nice.
62
00:07:41,410 --> 00:07:45,490
Well, I couldn't say either. I don't
know what they've been doing.
63
00:07:46,270 --> 00:07:47,690
Mind your own business.
64
00:07:48,270 --> 00:07:49,350
Now I know.
65
00:07:53,330 --> 00:07:57,210
Archie, is there an I .O .J.
66
00:07:57,530 --> 00:07:59,270
here? Huh?
67
00:08:05,260 --> 00:08:09,880
Edith's trying to say that there's a
child here, so watch your conversation.
68
00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:13,660
Do I have time to freshen up before
dinner, please?
69
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:15,580
She wants to go to the toilet, Edith.
70
00:08:18,420 --> 00:08:20,040
The powder room.
71
00:08:21,500 --> 00:08:22,740
Oh, well, take your pick.
72
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,400
But it's right at the head of the stairs
there.
73
00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:29,020
You can't miss it. It's the door with
the no knob on it.
74
00:08:37,130 --> 00:08:39,570
Oh, well, not there, Murray. There's
other chairs.
75
00:08:41,690 --> 00:08:47,190
Well, well, well, you sly dog.
76
00:08:49,750 --> 00:08:53,150
How come you never brought that swell
-looking number around to the saloon?
77
00:08:53,930 --> 00:08:57,170
Oh, Murray, she's a lovely girl.
78
00:08:57,390 --> 00:09:00,690
Yes. I'll bet your mother's very
pleased.
79
00:09:01,990 --> 00:09:06,070
My mother thinks it's a sin for me to
date girls who aren't Jewish.
80
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:08,960
Well, it is, but lie to your mother.
81
00:09:10,700 --> 00:09:11,800
I always do.
82
00:09:12,420 --> 00:09:14,500
She doesn't know that I'm going with
Ruthie.
83
00:09:26,340 --> 00:09:27,460
Oy vey.
84
00:09:32,620 --> 00:09:33,720
What did you say?
85
00:09:43,660 --> 00:09:45,060
I know what it means, but why did you
say it?
86
00:10:36,349 --> 00:10:37,349
for dingbat.
87
00:10:45,170 --> 00:10:48,250
That's the third thing I've learned
today.
88
00:10:57,790 --> 00:11:00,930
Edith, I hate to do this to you, but I
think it's best for everybody for Ruthie
89
00:11:00,930 --> 00:11:01,930
and me to leave right now.
90
00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:10,940
Ain't this a howl? A grown -up man is
scared of his mother.
91
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:14,500
You don't know my mother. Ruthie,
please, hurry up!
92
00:11:14,700 --> 00:11:18,820
Well, my mother never told me who to go
out with. No, your father did.
93
00:11:19,100 --> 00:11:20,520
Ruthie, please, hurry up!
94
00:11:25,260 --> 00:11:26,260
Uh -oh.
95
00:11:27,380 --> 00:11:28,380
Well,
96
00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:31,440
I don't see nobody racing for the door
now.
97
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:36,020
Well, go on, then.
98
00:11:37,870 --> 00:11:38,870
Then you don't.
99
00:11:44,050 --> 00:11:49,190
Come right in. Hello. I'm Edith Dunker.
I'm Rose Klein.
100
00:11:49,470 --> 00:11:51,390
This is Tante Gusty. How do.
101
00:11:51,750 --> 00:11:53,210
I mean, shalom.
102
00:11:54,290 --> 00:11:56,970
She's saying hello. I heard that.
103
00:12:12,590 --> 00:12:13,590
you care.
104
00:12:13,750 --> 00:12:14,750
Where's the girl?
105
00:12:24,590 --> 00:12:25,750
She's up in the toilet.
106
00:12:28,770 --> 00:12:30,030
We heard that.
107
00:12:33,330 --> 00:12:35,270
Oh, uh, Tante Gussie, ma.
108
00:12:35,490 --> 00:12:38,270
Can I meet my friend here? My partner,
Archie Bunker.
109
00:12:38,710 --> 00:12:43,160
Mama. So you're Archie Bunker? Yeah.
That's who I am.
110
00:12:43,720 --> 00:12:47,540
Murray told me all about you. Oh, yeah?
Well, he told me a lot about you, too.
111
00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:49,080
Murray's got a big mouth.
112
00:12:52,580 --> 00:12:56,420
Well, everybody sit down. Yeah, yeah,
everybody sit down. Sure, yeah, go
113
00:12:56,840 --> 00:12:57,840
Sit down.
114
00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:00,320
Except I usually sit there.
115
00:13:00,740 --> 00:13:01,960
Well, you can sit there.
116
00:13:20,880 --> 00:13:22,800
The day you were born, I didn't know you
were coming.
117
00:13:23,300 --> 00:13:24,480
But I was there.
118
00:13:28,440 --> 00:13:29,440
See what I mean?
119
00:13:30,020 --> 00:13:31,400
I'm a little scared of myself.
120
00:14:16,970 --> 00:14:17,970
Nice shape.
121
00:14:19,190 --> 00:14:20,630
Sissy dresser, huh?
122
00:14:21,610 --> 00:14:25,630
Tell me, tell me, where did you two
meet, Miss Mendel?
123
00:14:25,950 --> 00:14:28,570
It's not Mendel. It's Kendo.
124
00:14:29,350 --> 00:14:30,350
Kendo.
125
00:14:32,890 --> 00:14:36,410
The name is not... Not what, Ma?
126
00:14:37,290 --> 00:14:40,770
Not... No, Ma, it's not a Jewish name.
127
00:14:48,590 --> 00:14:50,330
Yeah, that's right, Mom. She's one of
ours.
128
00:14:55,570 --> 00:15:00,630
Mama. You all right, Mama? I'm all
right. I'm all right. I'm better than
129
00:15:00,630 --> 00:15:02,990
right. I'm fine and dandy. Good.
130
00:15:03,350 --> 00:15:05,130
I'm sorry, Mrs. Klein.
131
00:15:05,730 --> 00:15:08,670
What's to be sorry? You're such an
adorable girl.
132
00:15:09,990 --> 00:15:10,990
Thank you.
133
00:15:11,310 --> 00:15:13,630
My mother thought Murray was adorable,
too.
134
00:15:14,270 --> 00:15:15,330
Oh, ho, ho.
135
00:15:16,210 --> 00:15:19,460
So she already brung you all... over to
meet her mother, huh?
136
00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:20,760
That's right.
137
00:15:21,380 --> 00:15:26,720
Well, I guess we know what that means,
huh, Mom? Oh, they
138
00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:31,120
went out on a date.
139
00:15:31,420 --> 00:15:32,420
Big deal.
140
00:15:32,980 --> 00:15:35,280
Well, it could be a big deal there,
Tonto.
141
00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:48,210
These two, they've been doing their
number now for three months and... Four
142
00:15:48,210 --> 00:15:50,090
days, which is a lot of nights.
143
00:15:54,570 --> 00:15:58,530
Archie. Well, so, it's nice he got a
steady girlfriend.
144
00:15:58,870 --> 00:16:01,150
Sure. Hey, I'm all for that.
145
00:16:01,570 --> 00:16:02,570
Romance, you know.
146
00:16:02,890 --> 00:16:05,290
Marriage. Hey, they could have a family.
147
00:16:05,710 --> 00:16:07,150
You're still up to that, ain't you?
148
00:16:09,650 --> 00:16:11,050
Why don't you behave?
149
00:16:12,670 --> 00:16:15,690
I'm only interested in the family, the
kids.
150
00:16:16,220 --> 00:16:19,260
How would you raise the kids there,
Ruthie, Jewish or our way?
151
00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:21,220
All right, all right.
152
00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:22,980
I'm all right.
153
00:16:23,260 --> 00:16:24,820
Why does she keep hitting me?
154
00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:27,660
It's better than throwing water on you.
155
00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:36,560
Maybe I'd better get dinner on. Can I
help you, Mrs. Bunker? Are you sure you
156
00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:38,360
feel like it? I'd love to.
157
00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:41,560
Yeah, let her help. She don't want to
sit with us no more.
158
00:16:44,460 --> 00:16:46,360
Now watch with the face on you.
159
00:16:47,020 --> 00:16:48,800
There ain't much to do.
160
00:16:49,060 --> 00:16:51,920
Would you like to sit down? I'd like to
drop dead.
161
00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:55,720
Hey, how could he do this to his own
mother?
162
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:58,980
Well, let me get you a glass of water.
163
00:16:59,220 --> 00:17:01,860
I don't need water. I could use a little
schnapps, please.
164
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:03,240
Sure.
165
00:17:03,740 --> 00:17:04,740
What's that?
166
00:17:05,579 --> 00:17:07,099
It's booze, whiskey.
167
00:17:07,780 --> 00:17:08,780
Oh, sure.
168
00:17:16,780 --> 00:17:17,940
His father's not here.
169
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:20,079
If he were alive, he'd drop dead.
170
00:17:22,359 --> 00:17:23,859
Good, he's dead already.
171
00:17:28,740 --> 00:17:29,920
Children, children.
172
00:17:30,940 --> 00:17:34,780
Sometimes I think God put them on Earth
just to aggravate their mothers.
173
00:17:35,820 --> 00:17:38,920
Children are sweet. I love children.
174
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:42,120
Sure, you don't have any.
175
00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:51,780
A real daughter in California.
176
00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:53,860
No son?
177
00:17:54,260 --> 00:17:57,560
No. No wonder you love children.
178
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:04,260
I think my Murray takes those chicks out
just to upset me.
179
00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:15,020
Mrs. Klein, I don't think it's important
what a person's religion is.
180
00:18:15,140 --> 00:18:18,100
It don't matter what church they go to.
181
00:18:25,130 --> 00:18:27,650
a vote, or anything.
182
00:18:29,130 --> 00:18:35,810
Remember that story in the Bible? She
was a Ruth, too. She said, I
183
00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:41,950
go where you goeth, and your people will
be my people.
184
00:18:42,190 --> 00:18:45,770
And that Ruth was a Gentile, too.
185
00:18:48,610 --> 00:18:51,030
You're a good person, Mrs. Bunker.
186
00:18:51,470 --> 00:18:53,370
What a shame you're not Jewish.
187
00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:55,520
We could use someone like you.
188
00:18:58,820 --> 00:19:05,100
Mrs. Klein, I think Murray and Ruth are
very happy together.
189
00:19:05,860 --> 00:19:10,820
Why should you let their happiness make
you so unhappy?
190
00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:14,860
Because it's wrong.
191
00:19:17,280 --> 00:19:19,300
What if they do have children?
192
00:19:20,800 --> 00:19:22,540
What will the children be?
193
00:19:24,159 --> 00:19:26,560
Nothing. Just a heen, just a hair.
194
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:36,940
Lots of people marry outside their faith
and they have children.
195
00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:42,220
My nephew, Floyd, he married a Jewish
girl.
196
00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:43,600
Did it work out?
197
00:19:44,360 --> 00:19:49,420
No. But it might have if she hadn't been
killed in a car accident.
198
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,700
She's their daughter.
199
00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:06,500
Steffi is Jewish? Yeah.
200
00:20:06,980 --> 00:20:12,640
And we all live together here. We have a
fine time. Steffi's Jewish, I'm
201
00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:16,500
Episcopal, and Archie is something else.
202
00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,960
And we all love each other.
203
00:20:27,380 --> 00:20:30,180
Mrs. Bunker, this is your home.
204
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:56,180
Sit here. Oh, doesn't the table look
lovely?
205
00:20:56,940 --> 00:21:00,100
Well, come on. Let's put on a kosher
feedback here.
206
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:01,400
Not yet.
207
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:04,220
What are you doing with that on your
head?
208
00:21:04,420 --> 00:21:06,700
Come on, Murray. This is a dinner. It
ain't a funeral.
209
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:31,440
Blessed are you. Hands up.
210
00:22:31,660 --> 00:22:32,920
Don't holler at me, huh?
211
00:22:36,120 --> 00:22:42,080
Blessed are you, our God, ruler of the
universe, creator of the fruit of the
212
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:43,080
vine.
213
00:23:06,540 --> 00:23:07,540
You're the Jew here.
214
00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:08,880
I don't need that.
215
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:15,480
Amen.
216
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:20,040
Amen.
217
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:21,840
Gee, what a show -off.
218
00:23:23,580 --> 00:23:25,860
Now, here's the bread. Pass the bread.
219
00:23:26,380 --> 00:23:27,339
Here, Mama.
220
00:23:27,340 --> 00:23:31,060
Here, Archie. Don't eat all of it. Pass
them all. This is for you. Thank you.
221
00:23:31,260 --> 00:23:32,260
You're welcome.
16665
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