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(menacing music plays)
(dog barking)
(fingers snapping)
(woman gasping)
(woman yelpiflg)
(dramatic music plays)
- She went that way!
- Where? Where?
- All right, all right.
- [Woman] I didn't see where she went.
- [Man] All right, go over there.
- She's not in there.
- Where could the bitch be?
- In there?
- We looked everywhere. - I don't know.
- No, no, she's in here.
(dramatic music)
- No.
No, please...
Please don't...
I didn't mean it.
- We're gonna slice your bod...
- Cut her!
- Yeah...
Get her, boy!
- No, no, I'm sorry.
Oh, God, I didn't mean to!
No! I'm sorry!
Please, no!
Please, no!
No! No!
(dramatic music)
Oh no, please don't!
(woman screams)
(grunts)
No!
Please, no!
Stop it!
- Come on, baby, scream.
- No, please stop!
No!
- Hold her down.
- What are you doing? Oh, God!
- Get ready, baby.
- Get her, Roy.
Yeah.
Get her, man.
All right, Roy.
- Hold her!
(woman screaming)
. Woo!
(woman screaming)
(man grunting)
(strange, sensual music)
- Hell yeah!
- Whoa!
(man grunting)
- Go, Wendy, go!
(woman grunting)
(groaning)
(groaning)
(laughing)
(groaning)
- No...
(groaning)
- Come on, baby.
(groaning)
- [Man] Change around... Move around...
(laughing)
(groaning)
(grunting)
(groaning)
(grunting)
(laughing)
(grunting)
(groaning)
[Man] Do that again... (inaudible)
(groaning)
(grunting)
[Man] Now, kiss each breast...
- Oh, fuck me, please.
Fuck me, please...
Oh, wait'll I fuck you...
Oh, yes.
Oh, please... Fuck me.
Fuck me!
(woman groaning)
- Fuck this, baby.
Give it to her good.
(inaudible)
Get her nipples, too.
- Oh, give it to me, baby. Do it to me.
(woman groaning)
Fuck me.
- You take it good.
- Harder, harder!
- Oh, yeah.
(groaning)
[Man] All right, get something in a group like that.
(groaning)
- Go, girl, go-
(woman groaning)
Beautiful, beautiful.
- Oh, baby...
Rub your tongue on the end of it. Oh!
(woman groaning)
- You want to come?
- More... More...
[Man] Back off of her. Let's see more of her.
(groaning)
[Man] Move back a little bit more... That's good.
(woman moaning)
(woman groaning)
(groaning)
(groaning)
(groaning)
(laughing)
(woman grunting)
(soft instrumental music plays)
(grunting)
[Man] Lay down. Just move all around. Don't be so tight.
(grunting)
[Man] Okay, take it all off.
- Listen, everybody. I've got a confession to make.
It was me that tipped the cops.
- [Man] What a bitch.
What a bitch.
- Welcome. If you have a second or two, take off your coats.
Sit down, relax.
Make yourself at home,
and I'll tell you a real spicy tale
about what happened in this house a long, long time ago.
It was around the turn of the century,
when a gal by the name of Freckles Flossie
ran the grooviest whorehouse in town.
In fact, it was the only whorehouse in town.
I remember someone telling me
that she had as many as 12 girls making love at the same time.
One night, they had an especially wild party going on,
and people came from miles around
just to watch the strangest sexual exhibitions ever.
(woman singing)
- Hey, come on in!
(slow, groovy rock music)
(laughing)
(laughing)
(laughing)
(groaning)
- Hey, you!
- What?
- I don't want you to be with my boyfriend!
- Who's your boyfriend?
- Him! And you lay off of him!
- I didn't know he was your boyfriend.
- Just keep your hands off of him or |'ll--
- Ladies, please.
- Oh, come on. Just stop.
- [Man] Getting fiery now.
- I've heard that before.
- [Man] What the hell?
- [Man] I think they love each other.
(laughing)
- [Man] Pull her tits off. That's it!
. OW!
- [Man] Bite her! Bite her!
Get a load of them.
- Who you calling a bitch?
- Don't stop now, get her!
(laughing)
- Get off of me!
(grunting)
Ow!
(inaudible)
- Oh, yeah.
- If you stop fighting, I'll do a hula dance.
(tropical music)
- Come on, shake it!
(clapping)
- [Man] Woo-hoo-hoo.
- Oh: yeah!
(laughing)
(inaudible)
(laughing)
- That's what we're talking about, there we go.
(laughing)
- [Man] Get it on!
(groaning)
- [Man] Right on, right?
(groaning)
(groaning)
(grunting)
(laughing)
- [Man] You shouldn't have any clothes on.
(laughing)
(inaudible)
- Wasn't that a wild party?
Now, let me tell you my favorite story about Flossie,
and that was when she met Louie the Louse.
Can I tell you about Louie the Louse?
Naturally, he put the moves on her.
He liked his women hot and rough,
and he treated them equally roughly.
He loved Flossie's thighs.
He loved to kiss her stomach.
He was ravenous about her breasts.
In fact, one night he was so hot
he almost broke Flossie's door down.
(knocking on door)
- Who is it?
- Me, Louie.
- I don't want to see you. You're a big old bore.
(knocking on door)
Lay off, will you?
- [Louie] Listen, bitch, open the door or I'll break it down.
- Yeah, you and who else?
- [Louie] Oh, can it, baby. I didn't come here to fight you.
I want to fuck you.
- Fuck me? You don't know where to start.
You're just a filthy, dirty old man.
- [Louie] Listen up, baby, if you don't open the door,
then me and the boys are really gonna take care of you.
Now, if you're smart, you'll let me in.
- Okay, Louie, I'll give you one more chance.
But if you manhandle me again, I'll blow your brains out,
boys or no boys.
- Come along, baby, I want you.
(flighty instrumental music)
- Take it easy.
Lay off, will you?
(grunting)
Ow!
(screaming)
(grunting)
(man grunting)
- Hey, how was that, huh?
- Finished?
- Almost there.
How's that, bitch, did you get your jollies?
- Jollies? You've got to be the worst lover in the world.
You're disgusting.
- Maybe you need a nice guy like Rick.
- You wouldn't know a nice guy.
(slow jazz music)
(inaudible dialogue)
- I'm not very good at solitaire.
But I'm really happy to be with you here tonight.
I love your hair.
- You're strong.
- You're soft.
Your skin is just like silk.
You're lovely.
I've been waiting a long time to be here with you.
All I hear about is
how beautiful the girl is.
Baby, baby, baby- --
Oh, baby.
Lay down for me.
Smooth as silk.
Oh, my God.
(acoustic guitar music plays)
- Kiss me, oh, kiss me.
- You're like a darn drug.
(groaning)
I want to explore every inch of you.
oh, my God!
(grunting)
(dramatic instrumental music)
(grunting)
You're a little cuddle-bug, aren't you?
Oh, I wouldn't mind waking up in the morning with you.
[Man] I love you.
- [Woman] Turn the lights out.
- There's one thing I gotta do.
- What?
- It's been such a beautiful evening,
and there's something I just got to do
and you're gonna think this is funny.
Do one more handstand.
(laughing)
I'm gonna do it.
- I wish they could all do that.
(laughing)
Wasn't that really something else?
Some people just never learn, do they?
Now, this is something kind of special.
When Flossie had a first date--
I mean, her first paid date--
She was a fabulous looking (inaudible)
By the name of Bouncing Beulah.
I couldn't believe Flossie charging for a sensuous,
gorgeous, attractive-looking body like hers.
Huh, you never know.
- Beulah, I'm embarrassed now.
Even though I strip in front of thousands of men every week,
I'm nervous about how it will feel
to be with another woman.
- But that's not true.
(inaudible)
You know, I could show you a little thing.
You just gotta relax.
- I'd like that.
That sounds like a nice experience.
Such pretty hair.
- I like yours.
I'm gonna take off your dress.
(upbeat music)
P You don't hurt me, yes, I know P
P You don't love me, yes, I know P
P When you left me, pretty baby P
P And I have no place to go P
P Oh yeah! P
- So nice.
P You don't love me, yes, I know P
P I love you P
P I'll do anything you say P
P If you say you love me, baby P
P I'll get on my knees and pray P
P Yes, I love you P
P Yes, I love you, you know P
P You don't love me, yes, I know P
P You don't love me, yes, I know P
(grunting)
(groaning)
(slow, groovy music plays)
(laughing)
(laughing)
(grunting)
- It's a shame you've been waiting so long. You fuck good.
It feels really nice.
But there's something missing.
You know what you should really do?
You should try with (inaudible).
Pretty soon you could have everything.
- I think that's the best.
(inaudible)
- I'm gonna give you your money back.
' Really?
- We both know we like boobs.
And we both have really nice boobs.
And there's a lot of attraction.
Oh, baby.
(laughing)
(laughing)
Oh, yeah?
What else did you want us to do?
(inaudible off-screen dialogue)
(groaning)
(laughing)
Oh, my goodness.
(groaning)
(romantic instrumental music)
That's the story of the only house.
Thanks for stopping in and listening.
Become a guest if you can.
(light, symphonic music)
You're still here, people? Get out, we want to have some fun.
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