Original subtitles

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

There will be a slight delay in starting tonight's show.

Our play special delivery has not yet arrived.

However, it is being rushed to us by the fastest means available.

Unfortunately, it has a long and very complicated route to travel.

We haven't much more time, but I assure you that our producer will make every

effort to get the message through.

I'm afraid we'll have to start without it.

Saved just in the nick of time.

Special delivery for Fortnum.

Yes, that's right.

Thank you.

Morning, darling.

For me?

Sorry, no. It's for your son.

Tom!

Tom? Yeah, Mom?

Mail call.

Oh, boy!

It's from the Great Bayou Novelty Greenhouse!

Who's this?

Four. Wow, why so excited?

Don't you ever read the back pages of mechanical inventions?

Look here.

See? There they are.

There they are what?

The sylvan glade jumbo giant.

Guaranteed growth.

Raise them in your cellar for profit mushrooms.

Well, it looks like wheat.

The mushroom spawns in the wheat.

I've got to plant them, of course.

Fabulous growth in just 24 hours, the ad says.

Well, it's better than Tito's or God of Snakes. Sure is.

Just the man I want to see. Come on over. Well, maybe I better check and see

Cynthia wants anything. I'll be right over. No, no, no, look.

This can't wait. I want you to play psychiatrist for five minutes.

Susan, what?

Something strange is going on in the world. Well, hasn't there always been?

No, I mean something terrible has happened. Mrs.

Goodbuddy was complaining about flying saucers. No, I don't mean saucers.

Hi, Joe. Hi, son.

Tell me.

What exactly is intuition?

Intuition?

Well, I'd say it was subconscious information that you finally get around

recognizing with your conscious mind.

Good.

Over a long period of time, things gather.

Like this garage.

You start working with wood, you don't notice the shavings.

And one day you look at the floor, sawdust.

Dust collects.

And suddenly we know something.

Have you noticed that more people are vanishing nowadays than ever before?

Are they?

Yeah, just dropping out of sight.

Old Charlie Bemis gone.

Ben Hamilton gone.

More violence, too. And murders.

But that's not what I mean.

I know something beyond that.

Come on.

Aren't you going to let me in on it?

How can I?

It's like the old verse.

By the pricking of my thumb, something wicked this way come.

I fear nothing.

I fear everything.

Could be your glands.

Doctor says I may want.

Got a wonderful wife and child. I'm the luckiest man in the world.

And I'm scared stiff.

For me.

For my family.

And even right now for you.

Me? Mm -hmm.

And your friends and your friends' friends.

Well, what are we going to do about it? For the next few days, Bill, watch

everything. Feel everything.

Taste everything. Smell everything.

Maybe it's the way the wind blows through those weeds in that lot over

Maybe it's the way the sun hums on the telephone wires.

Come on, Dad.

Let's play monkey in the middle.

Okay.

I've never been so sure of anything in my life.

Something terrible is going to happen.

Well, that's it for now, fellas.

Bill.

Stop, look, and listen.

And in a couple of days, we'll compare notes.

Hey, Bob!

I said that's enough, fellas.

Well, Rog, I'll be glad to keep an eye peeled, but frankly, you've given me

nothing to go on.

I mean, how am I going to recognize this, whatever it is I'm looking for,

see it?

Oh, you'll know.

You've got to know.

If you don't, we're done for.

All of us.

Am I crazy?

You seem perfectly sane to me.

I'll see you in a couple of days, then.

Be careful.

Hey, Pop!

What are you doing?

Being aware.

Looking.

Feeling.

Tasty. Cynthia, is your intuition in working order?

Probably.

Well, in this earthquake weather, is the land going to sink? Is a hurricane

coming? Will our delphiniums die of blight?

Wait a moment.

Let me feel my bones.

Nope.

No flood, no hurricane, no blight.

Why?

Oh, I've run into a lot of doom talkers lately.

Two, anyway.

Hey! Sorry.

What's wrong, Dad?

Haven't you heard? The world's ending.

No. The way I see it, everybody lives forward.

Attaboy. What's this?

The crop.

The what? The mushroom.

They're doing great.

Look how big they are.

Well, by gosh, now, they really are. Those are mushrooms, aren't they?

Well, I mean, by mistake, they couldn't be... Toadstools?

Heck, Mom, what do you think I am? Well, I don't mean to criticize, but, well,

how do you tell?

Eat them.

If you live, they're mushrooms.

If you drop dead, well... I don't like them.

Oh, Mom, that's not what you said before. Well, I'm sorry. I didn't really

they'd grow. I thought we'd plant them, they'd die, and you'd throw them out,

and that would be that. But now I just...

Boy, when are we going to have the next wet blanket sale in this house?

Uh, time?

Never mind. Just

had to be honest.

I don't know why. I just had to say it.

I...

Hello?

Oh, hello, Dorothy.

Well, yes, I saw Roger today. He... He what?

When?

Are you sure?

I'll be right over.

Something happened to Roger.

He vanished.

Disappeared.

Dropped out of sight.

How long ago did your father leave?

I have no idea. I was just walking by and saw the closet empty.

All of Dad's clothes, gone.

You mean he left the house without your hearing?

I think he must have backed in five minutes and walked wherever he was going

we wouldn't hear a cab drive up in front of the house.

Well, I'll check the airport, train depot.

Dorothy, was... Was there anything in Roger's family background?

You mean insanity?

Oh, no, nothing like that.

No, Bill.

Somehow I feel... I feel he's been kidnapped.

You mean to tell me that he arranged to pack, walk out of the house and go and

meet his kidnappers?

I don't know.

But somehow I feel that they came into the house and... And forced him to

Wait a minute. Roger warned me today. He said something terrible was going to

happen to somebody we know.

What?

And how?

Bill, find him for me, please.

It's humanly possible.

Oh, Tom, he's all right now.

Those darn mushrooms mean so much to him.

Do they?

What about Roger?

He's gone all right.

Well, doesn't this kind of thing happen to lots of men in their 40s?

What?

Dreams of youth?

More wines?

Bolden women?

Chance for one last... slang maybe to some men, but not Roger, eh?

Fortnum? Yes.

Telegram. Thank you.

Bill?

Traveling New Orleans.

This telegram possible off -guard moment.

Refuse. Repeat.

Refuse all special delivery packages.

Roger.

What does he mean?

Operator, give me the police in a hurry.

Oh, I see.

Well, under the circumstances, I'm sorry. Very sorry.

That was Green City downstate.

The police boarded a southbound train there.

Roger was in a roomette.

He was traveling alone.

How could that be?

What about his telegram?

That must have been sent when his kidnappers were off their guard for a

He denies sending any telegram or that he needs any help.

He was polite.

Cheerful and good spirits, the police said.

Said he was on a quick business trip downstate.

Much obliged.

Thank you.

Good night.

Good night.

But what did the police do?

What could they do?

They looked around to see if anyone had a gun on Roger and... shot off the

train.

Well...

As long as he's all right.

But is he?

You just said that... They said.

After all, they couldn't very well insist that he was in danger and drag

the train, could they?

Why did he send us that telegram warning us not to accept any special delivery

packages?

We never get any special deliveries.

Just that one that came for Tom.

Roger was on his way to New Orleans.

Hello, Dorothy.

Did the police get in touch with you?

Well, yes.

And I don't understand.

Roger told them to leave him alone.

Oh, I see.

Dorothy, did you or any member of your family receive any special airmail

delivery packages in the last few days?

Well, yes.

About three days ago.

All the boys in the block are going in for it.

Going in for what?

Why do you ask?

There's nothing wrong with raising mushrooms, is there?

I said, there's nothing wrong with raising mushrooms, is there?

Erasmus Aureates.

Fungoid growths.

But how does it fit?

Anyone dead, no? Anyone poisoned?

Well... You can't sleep?

Oh,

no, too warm.

Cynthia, what if Roger was right and something terrible is happening, like...

the Earth?

being invaded by things from other worlds.

Bill.

How could creatures from outer space invade us without us noticing them?

No, I don't mean meteors or flying saucers, anything like that, but...

Bacteria comes from outer space too,

doesn't it?

Seeds, spores, pollen, viruses.

By the billions.

Hitting the atmosphere every second of every hour for millions of years.

Pouring down on us like an invisible rain.

Falling on our cities, our towns, our streets.

How long?

How long?

And Mrs.

Goodbuddies. Of course, people like her are always spraying poisons and kicking

mushrooms off their lawns, so it'd be hard for a strange new life form to

survive in a city.

Yes.

Maybe they'd be better off down south, say, Alabama, Louisiana.

Back in the dark bayous.

Mightn't they grow to a fine size?

Oh, really?

You don't seriously believe, do you, that the great bio or whatever the

greenhouse novelty company that sent Thomas' package is owned and operated by

six -foot -tall mushrooms from another planet?

Good heavens, Cynthia, there is some connection between Roger, mushrooms,

special delivery telegrams, Mrs. Goodbody, the whole work. Don't be

Oh, I'm not. It's just that... Think how insidious this plan could be.

These... Creatures from another world establish a greenery and advertise the

mechanical inventions, grow giant mushrooms for profit, and a million boys

in their money.

Tonight, this very minute, in how many homes all over the USA are billions of

mushrooms being grown by innocent boys in their cellars?

Now I know you aren't serious.

Well, half serious.

Mushrooms, however big.

Can't think or feel.

But they haven't got arms or legs.

How could they run a mail order business?

And take over the world?

Come on.

Let's go see your monsters.

They're very terrible fiends.

Come on, I'll fix you a snack.

Get me the milk, will you, darling?

Cynthia, did you put these mushrooms in the refrigerator?

No. Tom must have.

Close the door, will you?

Cynthia, there is a way for mushrooms to grow arms and legs.

What if a man wandering through the swamp picked them up and ate them?

Once inside, would not the mushroom spread through his blood and take over

cell, change that man from a man to a Martian?

Maybe Roger ate some of the mushrooms given to him by his son and was changed

into something else.

But in one last moment of sanity, of being himself, he sent us a telegram

warning us not to accept any mushrooms by special delivery.

Now, couldn't that be it, couldn't it? I've had enough of this. I'm going to

bed.

Tom?

Don't put the light on, Dad.

It's bad for the mushrooms.

Why did you put the mushrooms in the refrigerator?

Because I wanted you and mother to eat them.

You didn't eat any of them yourself?

Yes, I did.

You're hungry, aren't you?

You're hungry.

You're hungry.

I think that story has a very comforting message.

or mushrooms all over the world.

I'm seriously thinking of starting a counter -movement to persuade the

to grow people in their basements.

Now that we've seen our play, I think we'll send it back.

time good night