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What might be right for you may not be right for someone.

They got nothing but a dream, but they got different strokes to take, different

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Morning. Good morning, Arnold.

Was there a phone call for me?

Nope, I don't think so. Are you sure?

I'm positive, Arnold. Why all the excitement?

You may be looking at the newest member of a very exclusive club at my school.

If it's so exclusive, how come they're letting you in?

Well, how would you like to be picking grape nuts out of your afro?

Well, that sounds like it might be a lot of fun.

Picking grape nuts out of his apple?

No, joining a club.

You meet new friends, have a lot of fun.

I remember one that I joined when I was in college, all the silly things we used

to do.

I'll never forget my initiation.

I had to swallow a live goldfish.

I wonder what I'll have to do to join the Barracudas.

That's a strange name, the Barracudas. It was named by a strange guy.

Wait a minute, Arnold. I don't want you to join some club with a tough bunch of

kids like the Gooch. Oh, Dad, they're really swell guys, and the Gooch has

changed. You mean he doesn't howl anymore when there's a full moon?

How has he changed, Arnold?

Well, like, he's kind of calmed down.

Oh, you mean he's mellowed.

Yeah, even his manners are better. Now after meals, he licks his own fingers,

not everybody else's.

Well, okay, as long as there isn't going to be any rough stuff.

Thanks, Dad.

You're the greatest.

I know.

I have to do.

are supposed to be secret.

He doesn't want to tell us. That's his privilege.

Thanks, Dad.

But you could give us a little hint.

Come on, Arnold, please.

Come on.

Well, all right.

I'll tell you.

I have to stand on one foot and sing the Star Spangled Banner in front of the

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Well, at least they didn't ask you to do something silly.

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Hey, you better get with it. You're going to be late for school.

Boy, fish are lucky.

They don't have any problems.

They don't even get pimples.

You got a pimple?

No, just a problem.

Well, hey, lay it on me, bruh.

I mean, when dear Abby has a problem, she comes to me.

What's your problem?

I just can't. Okay, forget it.

Oh, you don't care about my problems.

Sure I do, Arnold, but I'm not a mind reader.

It's about my secret initiation.

Listen. No problem. If you have trouble hitting those high notes and the stars

playing a banner, wear tight underwear.

And what is your problem, brother?

Well, I guess if I told Abraham, I can tell you.

Yeah, blood is thicker than fish.

Well, I kind of lied before.

You see, Willis, for my secret initiation, I have to steal something.

Say what?

If I don't, the Gooch won't let me into his club.

That's the dumbest thing I ever heard of.

Stealing is wrong, Arnold. You know that, and you're not going to do it. But

gotta. If I get into that club, I'll really be somebody.

And if Dad finds out, he'll blow us top.

And you'll be somebody who needs a new bottom.

But, Willis, this is the most important thing in my life.

Listen, Arnold, if it's so important to get into this club, why don't you just

buy something and tell the Gooch you stole it? I can't do that.

Well, why not?

It would be dishonest.

No stealing, no way. You hear?

I hear.

He doesn't understand, Abraham.

It won't be like a big heist or anything.

I'll just steal something real cheap. You know, like something that only cost

quarter.

And I'll mail him the money back.

On second thought, it's kind of dumb to spend 20 cents to mail a quarter.

Thank you.

Just browsing?

No, just looking around.

Are you looking for anything in particular?

Yeah, the door.

Bye.

Bye.

When my dad gets here, he's going to kill me.

What makes you think you're going to get off that easy?

I can't believe this of you, Arnold.

We'll talk about it in a minute.

I'm his father, Philip Drummond.

You're his father?

He was adopted, but without handcuffs.

handcuffs on a ten -year -old. What did he steal? The Statue of Liberty?

Can I have a word with you, sir? Of course.

Look, he only stole a comic book. But what I usually do in a situation like

is I try to put a scare into the kids. You know what I mean?

Handcuffs seem to work pretty good.

I catch your drift.

Okay, young fella.

I think we can take those off now.

Hope they weren't too tight.

Arnold, what on earth made you steal?

Damn, I had to. It was for my secret initiation.

And the Gooch likes comic books.

Well, what about singing the Star -Spangled Banner?

It's not necessary, but if you want to, go ahead.

We'll talk about this more when we get home.

Would you consider just forgetting it?

No, I wouldn't. Now, you just pay for that comic book and let's go. I'm afraid

it's not quite that simple, Mr. Drummond.

You'll have to take it up with the owner, Mrs. Craig.

I phoned her. She'll be here any minute.

Now, is that really necessary?

Kids, every time I look around, one of them's ripping me off.

Is this a little thief?

Yes. I mean, no.

My son is not a thief.

You still willing to admit that you're my father?

Just barely.

Arnold, I'm shocked.

You lied to me about the gooch, you lied to me about your initiation, and now

you've just stolen something.

He's really a lovely little child.

I've heard that one before.

Look, I can't run a business this way.

Something has got to be done about all this crime.

You have a right to be upset.

Poor kid's deal. Rich kid's deal.

And sometimes it's not even for the money, just for the kick. Right, I

Good. Because I intend to press charges against that little thief.

You can't be serious.

Pressing charges for a comic book?

Does that cost... Twelve cents.

It happens to be worth $400.

What are you talking about, lady?

Oh, I get it.

Mrs. Craig, I'm willing to pay you a little something for your trouble, but

let's be reasonable. How about 50 bucks?

Are you trying to bribe me?

Ed, you better not answer that in front of the cop.

It so happens that this comic book is a 1963 Spider -Man number one series.

It is a rare copy and it is worth $400.

That's true, Mr. Drummond. Would you care to look it up in the catalog?

No, that won't be necessary. I'll write you a check.

Oh, no.

I'll bet that's your limousine out front.

Yes, what about it? I thought so.

You rich people think you can buy your way out of anything.

Well, you're not getting off that equally this time.

No, wait a minute. No, you wait. I have had it. We are talking grand larceny

here. Grand larceny?

Come on.

I'm afraid the lady's right. Anything over $250 is grand larceny.

Grand larceny?

What do you get for that?

If you're a father, a heart attack.

I'm not a thief. I'm just stupid.

Look, it was just a childish prank.

Uncle has never done anything like this before, and I assure you he'll never do

anything like this again. You can tell your sad story to the judge.

Look, as far as I'm concerned, your son is going to jail.

Jail?

You're sitting on the couch, you're watching TV, and your life's passing you

You keep procrastinating over and over. Well, maybe I'll go to school next year,

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Hey, Willis, will you please tell Arnold to stop worrying?

Hey, Arnold, stop worrying, man.

I mean, is this any way to spend your last few days of freedom?

I'm just kidding. I'm just trying to cheer you up. Well, it's not working.

Well, how come you didn't stop me from stealing?

Arnold, what do you think I was trying to do? I told you not to do it. Listen,

did everything I could.

You didn't threaten me.

Now, Arnold, what was I supposed to do?

Break both the arms and twist your head off?

Yeah, if you really love me.

Hey, Arnold, look what Adelaide brought for us.

Here, honey, this will make you feel better. It's your favorite peanut butter

cookies and a double chocolate milk on the rocks.

No thanks, Adelaide.

Maybe I ought to get used to bread and water.

Oh, honey, come on, cheer up. Your dad's going to come back with good news.

You really think so?

Yep. I feel it in my bones.

Dad, what happened with Mrs. Craig?

I'm afraid she turned us down, son.

I guess you can't trust old bones.

Look, Arnold, I did everything I could think of, and I just couldn't budge that

woman.

Well, what about your lawyer, Dad?

He did the best he could, too.

Well... Thanks for trying, Dad.

I guess the only time I'll be seeing you from now on is on Visitor's Day.

But, Arnold, what you did today was inexcusable, and you do deserve to be

punished for it. That's why we're going to have to go to family court.

Family court?

You mean when I go to jail, you won't have to come with me?

No, you're not going to go to jail, Arnold.

It's simply Saturday. We go to court. The judge will understand it's your

offense and that it was just a childish prank.

Yeah. Arnold, and when he sees those cute cheeks, he's going to pinch them

send you right home.

Right, Arnold.

It's going to be a piece of cake.

Well, just in case.

Could you put a file in it?

Now, Arnold, as your lawyer, my advice is that you just relax.

Everything will be all right.

Mr. Bishop, maybe I could relax if you sat here next to me. In fact, I'd be

more relaxed if you sat here instead of me.

Arnold, would you feel better if you held my hand?

I'll hold anything you give me.

Juvenile Family Court of the City of New York will come to order. All rise.

Judge Francis W. Biscay presiding.

Thanks, God.

Be seated.

It'll be all right, Arnold.

First case, Your Honor, is Craig v. Jackson.

Is Mrs. Craig present?

Here, Your Honor.

Is Mr.

Arnold Jackson present?

Right on, brother.

A simple yes, Your Honor, will be appreciated.

Yes, Your Honor.

Is Mr.

Jackson represented by counsel?

Yes, Your Honor.

But he's not going to say anything, even though my father pays him 150 bucks an

hour.

I'm well aware of white -collar crime.

Your Honor, my client would like to admit to the charge which is alleged in

petition. But we would ask you to hear the circumstances.

Very well.

Now then, Mrs. Craig, the petition states that Arnold Jackson entered your

and proceeded to steal a comic book worth $400.

Right, Your Honor.

And it's not the first time.

I object, Your Honor.

Arnold has never stolen anything before in his life. That's right, Your Honor.

Yeah, he's an honest little kid.

Who are all of you?

I'm his father.

I'm his brother.

And I'm his sister.

Well, I must say you have a colorful family tree.

You were saying, Mrs.

Craig... Your Honor, I didn't mean that this boy had stolen before. I just meant

I'm tired of being ripped off by a lot of kids and seeing them get away with it

just because they're kids.

I mean, if they're old enough to steal, they're old enough to pay the penalty. I

couldn't agree with you more.

Juvenile theft is a serious problem.

And I intend to do everything in my power to put a stop to it.

Young man, come here.

Now, exactly why did you take the comic book? Did you take it for the thrill of

stealing? Oh, no, Your Honor.

He took it for the gooch.

The gooch?

What is a gooch?

It's a big, ugly thing with bushy hair, little beady eyes, and big paws.

Person or an animal?

Both.

steal something or I couldn't become a barracuda.

A barracuda.

Oh, that's a club, Your Honor. You know, like the scouts, only they don't push

cookies. No, they steal comic books.

I didn't want to steal.

I wanted to swallow a live goldfish like my dad.

And your age is still doing those juvenile pranks?

Oh, no, Your Honor, I haven't had a goldfish for years.

Whether you were aware of the value of the book or not, the fact still remains

that you committed grand larceny.

Dad, what's happening?

I thought you said this would be a piece of cake.

Said if we did our own talk to the judge, it'd be a pushover.

You told your son that?

Not exactly.

My other son told him that.

What kind of values are you teaching your children?

Look, Your Honor, we were all trying to make Arnold feel better. He was a very

frightened little boy.

But since you've asked me, I'll tell you what kind of values I teach my

children.

I teach them to be kind and respectful.

I encourage them to be decent people who have feelings for others.

Now, Arnold is a fine boy and a wonderful son.

Mrs. Craig, I understand how you feel, but I just think you've chosen the wrong

boy to make an example of.

Mrs. Craig, I know it's wrong to steal, and I'm sorry.

But when you're ten years old, you do a lot of dumb things.

But they say I'll grow out of it.

Mrs. Craig, let me ask you something.

Is this the face of a grand larcenist?

Your Honor, maybe in this case I have made a mistake.

What do I do about it?

If you ask, I can drop the charges.

So I ask.

So I drop.

Case dismissed.

Thanks,

Mrs. Craig. I take back all the... things you never heard me say about you.

And you didn't make a mistake.

You'd realize that if you knew me better.

Oh, Mrs. Craig would get a chance to know you better.

How? I'll tell you how.

By you going to her store every day after school for a month and sweeping

That is, if it's all right with Mrs. Craig.

Oh, certainly.

A month?

That's right.

Mr. Bishop.

Yes, Arnold?

Just don't sit there.

here now the world don't move

to the beat of just one drum what might be right for you may not be right

Nothing but the jeans, but they got different strokes of things, different

strokes of things.