Original subtitles

hold is right here. Yeah,

good.

Yeah, and over here, too, please.

Go ahead.

Yeah, sorry.

Thanks.

Yeah.

No, you've got a great smile.

Except for that little caraway seed right there.

I couldn't have done it without you. Well, we certainly make a ripping jolly

good team, don't we?

Took the words right out of my mouth.

Except for ripping jolly.

You know, Ben, you do terrific work.

Oh, thanks.

I always say, a job worth doing is worth doing rather.

Screwdriver, please.

You haven't even heard my offer.

I don't have to. All I have to hear is your voice.

John, listen to me. Would you please listen?

Hundreds of Japanese tourists are coming into the city every day, right? Yeah.

Yeah, so they need somebody to show them the sights.

Who are they going to call?

Kuramoto Tours?

Good, John.

You would make a great tour guide. Yeah, yeah, forget it. You're just going to

have to show all these people around town yourself.

Me?

I'm the president of the company.

That is like asking Fannie Farmer to dip her own bonbon.

Guys, guys, I've got great news. Wait till everyone hears. Come on in.

You guys, wait till you hear this.

Now take off your coats. Hurry up. What is it?

Okay.

All right.

Try this on my own. Hey, Mary Beth, you're always interested in writing.

can give you some help.

John, I know you mean well, but I don't want anybody's help. Yeah, come on. You

guys cut the chicks some slack here?

Mary Beth, I think it's become increasingly clear that I, more than

in this room, understand what you're going through. And that is why you have

do what God put you on this green earth to do.

Come on, let's tighten up. She won't even have to point.

Listen, I want to ask you something. I'm putting together some background

information, you know, for Kuramoto Toys. I want to show proper respect for

their Japanese culture, you know. And I read somewhere that they consider it

extremely rude to say no.

Well, actually, that's true.

Fascinating.

Fascinating. Now, this no thing, does that also hold true for Japanese women?

They might not actually say no, but they certainly can get across to you that

they mean no.

I mean, the thing about Japanese culture.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, like I care.

Writer? How about that?

I'm writing for a soap opera.

Soap opera? Yeah, it's called The Divided Heart. Do y 'all know it? Oh,

sure. I've seen that show.

Sorry, dear, but I've never understood the fascination with all that mindless

drivel. Oh, but this one's sensational.

You see, the main character is Brett Davenport. He's a handsome doctor.

And he's married to a beautiful lawyer because...

She sounds panicky. Oh, dear.

I hope Nigel hasn't smacked her with the cat again.

So, so, so, Mary Beth.

Fill us in. Fill us in on everything.

What's it like working on a soap opera? Oh, it's been great. I've already

started on my first script.

I'd read y 'all some of it, but I know that's not the sort of thing we come to

the one -to -one club for.

Oh, Mary Beth. Okay.

All right.

This is a scene I just finished between Samantha, a beautiful, intelligent

redhead.

Love it. Good luck and hugs.

Come to me tonight. I won't tell a soul.

Mrs. Philbert, do you mind?

You're breathing a little heavy on my mohair.

He can fix it. Oh, yeah, yeah. He fixed that sink last month. Yeah.

Blended idea.

I've got to get home and get the water turned on. I'll write down my address.

Here you go.

And won't you give it to Ben when you see him?

I'm sorry to leave you. Don't worry, Louise. Don't worry. I'll make sure the

meeting continues.

Thank you, John.

You're in charge.

You can count on me, Louise.

Your father works at television?

Oh, no, no, no. Far from it. Daddy runs the Sunshine Baby Food Company.

Sunshine Baby Food?

Aren't they one of the sponsors of the Divided Hearts?

Only for the past 22 years.

Mary Beth, are you saying that your father is the president of the company

sponsors the show that just hired you?

Don't be silly.

He's the chairman of the board.

Sorry, thought you guys were done in here. Oh, Ben, listen, Louise wants you

go over to her apartment.

She does? Oh, yeah, she was hoping that you could take a look at a leaky faucet.

Here, she left you this.

Okay, thanks.

I cannot go on denying my feelings.

Plumber couldn't fix.

Oh, dear.

You did get a message about a leafy pipe, didn't you?

Sure.

I always like to bring flowers and wine when I come to fix a leaf.

You'd be surprised how many referrals it gets me.

That is so typical.

Really, I thought it was rather unique, the way the emeralds play off the time.

Not the brooch. You.

I told you I had something important to talk about, and you go around buying me

jewelry and think that'll take care of everything.

Now, wait a second. Daddy, how could you do that?

How could you get that job for me?

What job?

The writing job on The Divided Heart, as if you don't know.

You told them to hire me because you didn't think I could get it on my own.

You don't think I can do anything on my own.

You are so wrong, sunshine. Well, I've always known that someday you were going

to make it as a writer.

Remember this?

What's that?

It's a Father's Day card.

You wrote it for me. You made it in the fourth grade.

Now go ahead, read it.

You know why my daddy is so special?

He put my picture on his baby food.

By the way, I asked you to take that down.

Will you look at my head?

So when babies eat sunshine baby food, they grow up strong and healthy.

Because in every jar is a father's love for his little girl.

I am good, aren't I?

Even back then.

So, you had nothing to do with my getting that jar?

They hired me because they liked my writing?

Apparently.

on my own.

Daddy, I'm sorry I got so mad at you. Hey, I'm proud of you.

You showed me that you can go out and make it on your own without any help at

all, you old man.

Thanks. I'm glad you came by.

18 choruses.

Oh,

you know what this means, don't you?

John, the woman is singing a completely ridiculous, inane song about a man and a

hammer.

So?

What else? She's getting hammered.

Looking forward to some good dirt tonight.

Well, since I'm desperate, how's your love life?

Okay, John.

Okay.

You laughed at me. You squawked at me. You ridiculed me. And still he comes

for more.

You wanted no part of Herkimoho, of course. You thought it was a big waste

time.

Well, you blew it.

I just booked eight Japanese fat cats for a tour of the city tomorrow night.

And listen to this best one I am doing on these quote -unquote smart

businessmen. You know what those suckers are shelling out for this little trip

around town?

What?

Three thousand apiece.

$8 ,000?

Venom! $3 ,000? Yes!