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1
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So, last night was fun.
2
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-It was really fun.
-I had a really good time.
3
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Well, goodbye for real.
4
00:00:51,634 --> 00:00:52,802
Yeah.
5
00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:55,846
-I'm starving.
-I could go for some breakfast.
6
00:00:55,846 --> 00:00:57,640
Do you wanna go get something to eat?
7
00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:59,267
Definitely.
8
00:00:59,267 --> 00:01:01,519
-I'll just get my jacket.
-Yeah.
9
00:01:11,028 --> 00:01:13,698
The light is hitting the bacon just right
and I have to share it.
10
00:01:13,698 --> 00:01:15,783
You know, when you have 630 followers,
11
00:01:15,783 --> 00:01:18,995
-it kinda becomes a responsibility.
-You're gonna have 631 soon.
12
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If you keep taking pictures like that.
13
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I did. I hung out by
the crudité table all night,
14
00:01:23,708 --> 00:01:25,418
trying to work up
the courage to talk to you
15
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:26,711
because I knew you'd be back.
16
00:01:26,711 --> 00:01:28,838
I kept going back to the crudité table,
17
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trying to get you to notice me.
18
00:01:30,881 --> 00:01:33,551
I noticed you the moment
you walked in the door.
19
00:01:33,551 --> 00:01:34,760
What's your last name?
20
00:01:34,760 --> 00:01:37,138
Why?
So you can Google-stalk me?
21
00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:40,474
No, I just wanna know
what to put in my phone.
22
00:01:41,475 --> 00:01:43,769
I'm not giving you my phone number.
23
00:01:55,865 --> 00:01:57,533
You've made a huge mistake.
24
00:01:57,533 --> 00:01:59,410
I knew it.
I felt it in my gut.
25
00:02:11,213 --> 00:02:13,591
-Oh, shit.
-What?
26
00:02:13,591 --> 00:02:16,052
I forgot that I made plans
with my friends today.
27
00:02:16,052 --> 00:02:19,180
Yeah, yeah, yeah, go to your friends.
It's not a big deal.
28
00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:21,265
-Unless you want. I could stay.
-This was fun.
29
00:02:22,224 --> 00:02:23,809
-I should go.
-Do you wanna stay?
30
00:02:23,809 --> 00:02:25,186
Okay.
31
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:32,568
What is that?
32
00:02:33,611 --> 00:02:36,072
-What?
-That face.
33
00:02:36,072 --> 00:02:37,865
Is that your "I wanna kiss you" face?
34
00:02:37,865 --> 00:02:39,200
No.
35
00:02:40,284 --> 00:02:43,245
-Wait. Unless...
-Unless what?
36
00:02:43,245 --> 00:02:45,498
What does your
"I wanna kiss you" face look like?
37
00:02:45,498 --> 00:02:48,167
It looks a lot like this.
38
00:03:02,139 --> 00:03:04,225
You are unbelievable.
39
00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:13,901
You are literally unbelievable!
40
00:03:13,901 --> 00:03:15,945
If I told someone,
"This is what Leilani said to me,"
41
00:03:15,945 --> 00:03:17,279
they'd be like, "I don't believe you."
42
00:03:17,279 --> 00:03:18,989
-You're not upset!
-Why would I be upset?
43
00:03:18,989 --> 00:03:20,408
Because it's fucked up.
44
00:03:20,408 --> 00:03:23,035
Don't make this a whole global thing--
45
00:03:23,035 --> 00:03:25,162
-I'm upset.
-I thought you were kidding.
46
00:03:25,162 --> 00:03:27,039
-Why would I kidding about this?
-Oh, my God!
47
00:03:28,457 --> 00:03:31,877
-Okay, he's up now.
-You think we would win The Amazing Race!
48
00:03:31,877 --> 00:03:34,255
-You don't?
-You think, in a game show
49
00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:36,215
about a race around the fucking world,
50
00:03:36,215 --> 00:03:38,801
you and me would come out on top.
51
00:03:38,801 --> 00:03:40,344
I did, but now I'm not so sure.
52
00:03:40,344 --> 00:03:41,971
We can't even agree on a restaurant.
53
00:03:41,971 --> 00:03:46,016
We can't agree because you have a problem
with every restaurant in New Orleans.
54
00:03:46,016 --> 00:03:48,436
The restaurant capital of the world,
and you can't decide.
55
00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:50,730
Actually, Hong Kong is
the restaurant capital of the world.
56
00:03:52,314 --> 00:03:55,151
I just don't want you to embarrass
yourself in front of your friends
57
00:03:55,151 --> 00:03:56,819
by getting these pretty basic facts wrong.
58
00:03:56,819 --> 00:03:59,947
I don't hate restaurants.
I like restaurants.
59
00:03:59,947 --> 00:04:03,033
You literally spent several hours yesterday
writing a negative Yelp review
60
00:04:03,033 --> 00:04:04,535
with your white-woman fingers
61
00:04:04,535 --> 00:04:06,412
about that tapas place we went to,
62
00:04:06,412 --> 00:04:08,956
-and I thought it was tasty.
-It was very salty.
63
00:04:08,956 --> 00:04:11,709
I didn't know I'd get
mouth-fucked by the Dead Sea!
64
00:04:11,709 --> 00:04:15,004
And I don't have white-woman fingers.
I've got meaty bronze.
65
00:04:15,004 --> 00:04:16,714
Why are you being so loud?
66
00:04:16,714 --> 00:04:18,632
Do you want the neighbors
to think we're crazy?
67
00:04:18,632 --> 00:04:20,509
Who cares what they think?
They don't know us.
68
00:04:20,509 --> 00:04:23,262
Hi, nice to meet you!
We're fighting!
69
00:04:23,262 --> 00:04:25,639
No, we're not!
We're rehearsing a play!
70
00:04:25,639 --> 00:04:27,475
It's a fight scene.
71
00:04:27,475 --> 00:04:29,935
-How's this?
-It's fun.
72
00:04:29,935 --> 00:04:32,354
It's fun?
What do I look like, Chuck E. Cheese?
73
00:04:32,354 --> 00:04:34,857
But sexy.
You're like Fuck E. Cheese.
74
00:04:37,026 --> 00:04:40,654
By the way, you know you can't have
your cell phone on those shows, right?
75
00:04:40,654 --> 00:04:42,323
You'd lose your mind.
76
00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:44,283
No, I'd be liberated without that thing.
77
00:04:47,244 --> 00:04:48,954
-I'm good.
-You wanna get that?
78
00:04:48,954 --> 00:04:50,915
Nope, I'm good!
79
00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:53,125
What if somebody liked
something on Instagram?
80
00:04:55,586 --> 00:04:57,838
Shut up.
You don't know me.
81
00:04:57,838 --> 00:04:59,840
It's Val.
She said I look thicc.
82
00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:02,885
Mm-hmm.
Another reason we wouldn't win that show,
83
00:05:02,885 --> 00:05:06,388
you can't take selfies when you're
half naked, eating ants off a stick.
84
00:05:06,388 --> 00:05:07,807
Do you even watch the show?
85
00:05:09,433 --> 00:05:11,101
Have I seen The Amazing Race?
86
00:05:11,101 --> 00:05:13,270
This is literally the question
you're asking me right now?
87
00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:14,688
That's what I'm asking you.
88
00:05:14,688 --> 00:05:17,525
You're asking me have I seen
The Amazing Race?
89
00:05:19,485 --> 00:05:22,947
You've spent this time judging this show
and you've never seen an episode?
90
00:05:22,947 --> 00:05:24,949
I don't need to see something
to know I'd hate it.
91
00:05:24,949 --> 00:05:26,992
I've never been hit by a truck,
but I know it'd suck!
92
00:05:26,992 --> 00:05:28,953
-Wow!
-I don't wanna rot my brain
93
00:05:28,953 --> 00:05:30,496
watching that reality show garbage.
94
00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:32,623
You make documentaries, okay?
95
00:05:32,623 --> 00:05:34,834
Those are just reality shows
that no one watches.
96
00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:37,920
Documentaries are not reality shows.
Documentaries are reality.
97
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:40,631
Okay?
My work is social activism.
98
00:05:40,631 --> 00:05:42,675
I don't do it for the RTs.
99
00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:45,177
You don't have to say RTs.
Just say retweets, Dad.
100
00:05:45,177 --> 00:05:46,720
Can we please go?
101
00:05:46,720 --> 00:05:48,889
The later we are,
the longer we'll have to stay.
102
00:05:48,889 --> 00:05:51,433
What's the rush? Not like we're doing
anything exciting afterward.
103
00:05:51,433 --> 00:05:53,394
I thought we were gonna have sex.
104
00:05:53,394 --> 00:05:55,396
Oh, yeah, 'cause nothing gets me hotter
105
00:05:55,396 --> 00:05:58,274
than a plan in the day
to have sex at night. Freaky!
106
00:05:58,274 --> 00:06:00,317
You want freaky sex?
We could do freaky sex.
107
00:06:00,317 --> 00:06:01,986
Just let me know what you want me to do
108
00:06:01,986 --> 00:06:04,071
and I will do it to you
at the designated time.
109
00:06:04,071 --> 00:06:06,657
That is the antithesis of freaky sex!
Okay?
110
00:06:06,657 --> 00:06:08,492
Just schedule me in your calendar.
111
00:06:08,492 --> 00:06:11,736
"Intercourse with Leilani at 10:42."
Super sexy.
112
00:06:12,454 --> 00:06:15,374
Okay. Freaky sex and scheduling
are not mutually exclusive, okay?
113
00:06:15,374 --> 00:06:18,294
You think people randomly show up
at the same time for an orgy?
114
00:06:18,294 --> 00:06:20,087
No, they probably share a Google Calendar.
115
00:06:20,087 --> 00:06:23,424
I think it's spontaneous.
One guy comes, another guy comes.
116
00:06:23,424 --> 00:06:25,509
They show up and they have sex.
117
00:06:25,509 --> 00:06:28,345
It's a bunch of guys there,
why wouldn't you have sex with them all?
118
00:06:29,221 --> 00:06:32,057
Okay, there's a lot
to parse through there,
119
00:06:32,057 --> 00:06:35,019
but you're talking about a gang bang,
I'm talking about an orgy.
120
00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:38,480
Tomato, tomahto. And where are you
getting your group sex information?
121
00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:41,275
-BuzzFeed?
-I don't know! Very specific example.
122
00:06:57,833 --> 00:07:00,711
So, who's gonna be
at this dinner-party thing?
123
00:07:00,711 --> 00:07:02,755
Bobby and Reva.
124
00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:05,507
Val...
125
00:07:05,507 --> 00:07:09,178
I think maybe Keith, Stefan...
126
00:07:09,178 --> 00:07:11,096
Oh, you think maybe Keith?
127
00:07:11,972 --> 00:07:13,057
Yeah, maybe.
128
00:07:13,057 --> 00:07:15,559
As if you're not 100% sure
he's gonna be there.
129
00:07:15,559 --> 00:07:17,311
-I'm not sure. I'm not.
-Oh, yeah?
130
00:07:17,311 --> 00:07:20,856
You wanna bet? I bet he's gonna
be there with his lame jokes
131
00:07:20,856 --> 00:07:22,441
and his boring IT stories
132
00:07:22,441 --> 00:07:26,362
and his beach muscles he gets
from diligent exercise and diet.
133
00:07:26,362 --> 00:07:29,365
-Are you done?
-Hate to burst the Keith bubble,
134
00:07:29,365 --> 00:07:32,076
but all those hilarious jokes
that he does?
135
00:07:32,076 --> 00:07:34,954
Katt Williams.
They're Katt Williams' jokes.
136
00:07:34,954 --> 00:07:37,206
You're saying that he steals his jokes
from Katt Williams?
137
00:07:37,206 --> 00:07:40,125
Exactly. You remember when Keith
just slipped into conversation like,
138
00:07:40,125 --> 00:07:43,045
"I hate when people say, 'Nice to meet
you,' before I've ever said anything.
139
00:07:43,045 --> 00:07:46,924
How do you know it's nice to meet me?
I'm an asshole!"
140
00:07:46,924 --> 00:07:48,884
That's Katt Williams, word for word.
141
00:07:48,884 --> 00:07:51,553
-That doesn't sound like Katt Williams.
-I'm not gonna use the voice.
142
00:07:51,553 --> 00:07:55,349
To win The Amazing Race,
you need to be a team, on the same page.
143
00:07:55,349 --> 00:07:58,268
I'm on one page of the book
and you're reading a magazine.
144
00:07:58,268 --> 00:08:00,688
I would love to be
on the same page as you,
145
00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:03,315
but you're always locked
in your office editing that movie.
146
00:08:03,315 --> 00:08:06,026
It's not a movie.
This is a documentary
147
00:08:06,026 --> 00:08:07,778
about corruption in the educational system.
148
00:08:07,778 --> 00:08:09,655
How would I know?
You won't even show it to me.
149
00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:12,032
-I'll show it to you whenever you want.
-Been working on it forever.
150
00:08:12,032 --> 00:08:13,242
Okay, great.
How about tomorrow?
151
00:08:13,242 --> 00:08:15,285
I can't do it tomorrow.
I'm rendering the animation.
152
00:08:15,285 --> 00:08:18,247
Do you know how embarrassing it is
that you've been working on this forever?
153
00:08:18,247 --> 00:08:20,332
All my friends know it,
and nobody's seen anything.
154
00:08:20,332 --> 00:08:22,376
Why do you care what your friends think?
155
00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:24,837
Because I have friends.
You don't have friends
156
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:26,588
and I always have to make excuses for you.
157
00:08:26,588 --> 00:08:27,673
Ryan.
158
00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:29,299
I'm saying you can do things simultaneously.
159
00:08:29,299 --> 00:08:31,427
When you do an ad campaign,
that's different--
160
00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:33,846
Don't bring up my job.
You always do this.
161
00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:36,390
You brought up my job,
I'm bringing up your job. Why is that--
162
00:08:36,390 --> 00:08:40,894
It's not a job-- Like, mine is a job.
I just wanna say that.
163
00:08:40,894 --> 00:08:43,647
-It's the same thing.
-I go to work. You work at home.
164
00:08:43,647 --> 00:08:46,859
Right, 'cause you're selling products
like soap and stuff.
165
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:49,653
That's what I'm talking about.
It's bodywash. I always tell you.
166
00:08:49,653 --> 00:08:52,948
Sorry. I didn't mean to offend bodywash
by calling it soap.
167
00:08:52,948 --> 00:08:54,908
You didn't offend bodywash.
You offended me.
168
00:08:54,908 --> 00:08:58,454
I'm so sorry I offended you
by calling it soap and not bodywash.
169
00:08:58,454 --> 00:09:00,956
Soap is a bodywash.
You wash your body with soap.
170
00:09:00,956 --> 00:09:02,916
It's the same thing.
171
00:09:02,916 --> 00:09:04,460
Making a documentary is like--
172
00:09:04,460 --> 00:09:06,587
Can you please stop talking and listen?
173
00:09:09,339 --> 00:09:11,216
Look, I don't wanna fight
174
00:09:11,216 --> 00:09:13,469
and I'm sorry, okay?
175
00:09:13,469 --> 00:09:14,762
I'm sorry too.
176
00:09:14,762 --> 00:09:17,306
So when we get there,
can you please be in a good mood?
177
00:09:17,306 --> 00:09:19,683
'Cause I don't want them to know
that we've been fighting.
178
00:09:19,683 --> 00:09:21,935
Oh, my God.
You did a fake apology.
179
00:09:21,935 --> 00:09:25,355
You saw we were, like, seven minutes away
and thought, "Oh, I should wrap this up."
180
00:09:25,355 --> 00:09:27,608
You actually think that
I would fake-apologize
181
00:09:27,608 --> 00:09:31,153
just so you wouldn't bring your weird,
cranky baby energy into the dinner party?
182
00:09:31,153 --> 00:09:33,947
Yes, that's what I think
and that's what I said.
183
00:09:33,947 --> 00:09:37,076
I'm so fucking stupid
I bought your fake apology.
184
00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:38,952
I'm sorry I believed your fake apology.
185
00:09:38,952 --> 00:09:41,038
I'm sorry you're such a huge child.
186
00:09:41,038 --> 00:09:43,540
I'm sorry you have the capacity
to be so mean to me.
187
00:09:43,540 --> 00:09:45,542
I'm sorry that you make it so easy.
188
00:09:45,542 --> 00:09:47,002
Well, then I guess we're both sorry.
189
00:09:47,002 --> 00:09:48,504
-Yeah, I'm sorry. Sorry!
-Sorry!
190
00:09:48,504 --> 00:09:50,172
-Sorry, sorry, sorry!
-Sorry! Sorry!
191
00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:53,008
-Sorry, sorry, sorry!
-Sorry, sorry. Sorry!
192
00:09:53,008 --> 00:09:54,927
-Sorry times a million!
-Sorry.
193
00:09:58,639 --> 00:10:00,808
Steph and George are getting married?
194
00:10:00,808 --> 00:10:02,184
Did you just like that?
195
00:10:03,060 --> 00:10:04,186
Yeah.
196
00:10:06,438 --> 00:10:09,233
-What happened to “marriage is bullshit"?
-It is.
197
00:10:09,233 --> 00:10:11,485
Okay.
Well, then why did you like it?
198
00:10:11,485 --> 00:10:14,696
Because I didn't wanna be the only one
out of our friends to not like it.
199
00:10:14,696 --> 00:10:15,781
I'm not a hater.
200
00:10:15,781 --> 00:10:17,908
Okay.
Since the day we've met,
201
00:10:17,908 --> 00:10:20,577
you've talked about how you think
marriage is fucking lame.
202
00:10:20,577 --> 00:10:22,788
I didn't say "lame."
I said "problematic."
203
00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:25,916
Right. Two people declaring
their eternal love for each other.
204
00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:27,459
How problematic.
205
00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:29,837
I think you do want all that stuff.
206
00:10:29,837 --> 00:10:32,422
Marriage and kids.
You just don't want it with me.
207
00:10:32,422 --> 00:10:35,384
And I think that you just want
someone with no expectations,
208
00:10:35,384 --> 00:10:38,137
so you can sit in that room by yourself
for the rest of your life.
209
00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:41,265
I think you just want a relationship
that you can brag about to your friends.
210
00:10:41,265 --> 00:10:43,350
Yeah, I do!
And I'm not willing to settle.
211
00:10:43,350 --> 00:10:44,935
I don't wanna settle, either.
212
00:10:44,935 --> 00:10:47,437
I don't wanna be with someone
who's so fucking shallow.
213
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:53,652
And I don't wanna be with someone
who's so satisfied with being a failure.
214
00:11:03,620 --> 00:11:05,831
-I can't do this anymore.
-This isn't working.
215
00:11:14,673 --> 00:11:16,216
Are we done?
216
00:11:16,216 --> 00:11:18,468
I think we've been done for a while.
217
00:11:25,893 --> 00:11:27,352
-Fuck!
-Shit!
218
00:11:27,352 --> 00:11:30,898
-Oh, fuck.
-Shit.
219
00:11:32,649 --> 00:11:34,943
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
220
00:11:34,943 --> 00:11:37,487
-Are you okay?
-You okay?
221
00:11:37,487 --> 00:11:39,865
There's blood.
Here, let me help you up.
222
00:11:39,865 --> 00:11:42,826
-You shouldn't move him.
-Oh, right. Yeah.
223
00:11:42,826 --> 00:11:44,620
-I'm gonna call 911, okay?
-No, no, no!
224
00:11:44,620 --> 00:11:46,705
-I'm fine. I gotta go.
-You're bleeding.
225
00:11:46,705 --> 00:11:48,790
-Are you sure?
-I gotta go. I gotta go!
226
00:11:52,544 --> 00:11:55,005
I don't know if that's a good idea, man.
227
00:11:55,005 --> 00:11:56,673
-Thank you.
-I'll call 911.
228
00:11:56,673 --> 00:11:59,676
Wait, wait, wait! Wait!
You forgot your phone!
229
00:12:00,594 --> 00:12:02,095
Oh, my God.
230
00:12:10,562 --> 00:12:12,689
-I need your car!
-What?
231
00:12:12,689 --> 00:12:14,316
I'm a police officer and he's a criminal!
232
00:12:14,316 --> 00:12:15,984
Move the fuck over!
Get in the back!
233
00:12:15,984 --> 00:12:17,194
Move, move, move!
234
00:12:17,861 --> 00:12:18,862
Hold on.
235
00:12:22,324 --> 00:12:23,450
Where'd he go?
236
00:12:24,117 --> 00:12:25,202
Where'd he go?
237
00:12:26,954 --> 00:12:29,915
-He went that way!
-East! East! Suspect headed eastbound.
238
00:12:36,171 --> 00:12:37,923
What did he do?
Was it drugs?
239
00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:39,675
It was drugs, huh?
Are you undercover?
240
00:12:39,675 --> 00:12:41,802
You can't tell us if you're undercover?
I get it.
241
00:12:41,802 --> 00:12:43,637
At least we didn't hit a good guy, right?
242
00:12:43,637 --> 00:12:46,390
It's not good that we hit someone,
but we hit a bad guy?
243
00:12:46,390 --> 00:12:48,141
Yeah, who rides a bike
in this part of town?
244
00:12:48,141 --> 00:12:50,477
Yeah, where do you think you are,
Europe?
245
00:12:53,855 --> 00:12:55,399
Sorry, we'll be serious.
246
00:12:55,399 --> 00:12:57,567
Right there!
There he goes!
247
00:12:59,695 --> 00:13:01,738
Off the sidewalk, asshole!
248
00:13:07,744 --> 00:13:09,496
Turn, turn, turn!
249
00:13:09,496 --> 00:13:11,373
We got him.
Yes!
250
00:13:12,666 --> 00:13:14,001
Shit!
251
00:13:16,461 --> 00:13:18,422
Rats!
Right?
252
00:13:18,422 --> 00:13:20,340
If you make a left up here,
you can cut him off.
253
00:13:20,340 --> 00:13:21,758
Oh, good idea.
254
00:13:22,676 --> 00:13:24,261
Yep!
255
00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:28,974
There he is,
over there!
256
00:13:32,019 --> 00:13:33,478
Fucking jaywalkers.
257
00:13:37,733 --> 00:13:40,193
Shit, he's going in circles!
What an idiot!
258
00:13:43,655 --> 00:13:45,365
Turn! Turn!
259
00:13:46,366 --> 00:13:48,785
There, there, there!
Go, go, go! He turned the corner!
260
00:13:48,785 --> 00:13:50,787
Go down this alley, it's a dead end!
261
00:13:52,664 --> 00:13:53,957
Justice!
262
00:14:02,341 --> 00:14:03,592
Oh, my God!
263
00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:25,072
So, do we cuff him now?
264
00:14:30,952 --> 00:14:32,871
Officer,
could you please stop doing that?
265
00:14:34,790 --> 00:14:36,249
Oh, my God.
266
00:14:50,347 --> 00:14:52,057
I don't think he's a cop.
267
00:15:18,458 --> 00:15:20,168
Oh, my God.
268
00:15:20,168 --> 00:15:21,586
Hello?
269
00:15:22,546 --> 00:15:23,755
I think he's fucking dead.
270
00:15:24,589 --> 00:15:25,841
Oh, shit!
271
00:15:25,841 --> 00:15:28,552
-What the fuck?
-Oh, my God.
272
00:15:32,222 --> 00:15:34,599
Oh, my God, what did you do?
273
00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:37,978
-No, no, no.
-No, no, no.
274
00:15:37,978 --> 00:15:40,313
-This isn't what it looks like.
-We didn't kill him.
275
00:15:40,313 --> 00:15:41,898
You hit him with your car.
276
00:15:41,898 --> 00:15:43,608
No! I mean, yes, I did,
but--
277
00:15:43,608 --> 00:15:45,277
-No, that's all.
-That was a while ago.
278
00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:46,862
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
279
00:15:46,862 --> 00:15:49,865
After I hit him, he was alive and,
like, great.
280
00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:52,284
Not "great."
He wasn't having the best day,
281
00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:54,786
-but he has been breathing since then.
-He's fucking dead!
282
00:15:54,786 --> 00:15:56,997
We know he's dead, but we didn't kill him.
283
00:15:56,997 --> 00:15:58,206
He just said he killed him.
284
00:15:58,206 --> 00:16:00,500
No. I said I hit him with my car.
Very different.
285
00:16:00,500 --> 00:16:03,003
Clearly it worked.
You killed the guy with your car!
286
00:16:03,003 --> 00:16:05,130
-We hit him earlier, driving...
-I was driving, we broke up.
287
00:16:05,130 --> 00:16:06,965
-I got distracted...
-...to Bobby and Reya's house.
288
00:16:06,965 --> 00:16:10,177
-...and I ran through a red light.
-This guy with a mustache...
289
00:16:10,177 --> 00:16:13,013
I helped him with my map,
which I admit was a mistake.
290
00:16:13,013 --> 00:16:15,182
He took our car, ran over him like a dog--
291
00:16:15,182 --> 00:16:16,433
We need to call the cops.
292
00:16:16,433 --> 00:16:18,435
Back and forth ten times
293
00:16:18,435 --> 00:16:21,771
and I've got a dead guy's blood on me
and my car's a fucking murder weapon!
294
00:16:21,771 --> 00:16:23,523
-What are you doing?
-I'm calling 911.
295
00:16:23,523 --> 00:16:25,317
Please don't do that.
We would never hurt anyone.
296
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:27,694
I hate hurting people.
I'm a documentary filmmaker.
297
00:16:27,694 --> 00:16:31,323
She works at a very prestigious ad agency.
They've won, like, five Clios.
298
00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:33,867
We do ads and digital media.
It's, like, a multi-platform thing.
299
00:16:33,867 --> 00:16:35,994
Tell them about the awards you've won.
300
00:16:35,994 --> 00:16:39,789
Marketing, and I won one
for digital entrepreneurship.
301
00:16:39,789 --> 00:16:42,334
You see?
We're good people.
302
00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:44,461
I'd like to report a murder or whatever.
303
00:16:44,461 --> 00:16:45,921
We didn't murder anybody!
304
00:16:45,921 --> 00:16:47,088
-Yeah, stop.
-You stop!
305
00:16:48,006 --> 00:16:49,883
Oh, my God,
the police aren't gonna believe us.
306
00:16:49,883 --> 00:16:51,510
Do you know how stupid we sound?
307
00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:54,513
-This is a citizen's arrest.
-What is that?
308
00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:56,348
-It's an arrest from a citizen.
-Can you do that?
309
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:58,808
-Can he do that?
-On the count of three. Okay?
310
00:16:58,808 --> 00:17:01,061
On the count of three, what?
What is that face?
311
00:17:01,061 --> 00:17:03,104
I can't read your face! Just say it.
312
00:17:03,104 --> 00:17:04,689
-On the count of three.
-What?
313
00:17:04,689 --> 00:17:06,483
-One, two, three, go!
-What?
314
00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:08,401
-The guy ran for it.
-Jibran!
315
00:17:08,401 --> 00:17:10,111
Okay, the guy's name is Jibran.
316
00:17:10,111 --> 00:17:12,614
-Run, Leilani!
-The girl's name is Leilani.
317
00:17:12,614 --> 00:17:14,616
Shit.
318
00:17:14,616 --> 00:17:15,951
She's--
She's running too now.
319
00:17:15,951 --> 00:17:18,787
She's wearing heels
that look actually amazing.
320
00:17:18,787 --> 00:17:20,872
Oh, she just happens to be
African-American
321
00:17:20,872 --> 00:17:23,333
and he just happens to be
a person of color as well.
322
00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:25,835
But I don't think they're murderers
because they're minorities.
323
00:17:25,835 --> 00:17:28,171
I think they're murderers
because they just killed a guy
324
00:17:28,171 --> 00:17:29,464
-and he's laying here.
-Hey, guys.
325
00:17:29,464 --> 00:17:31,967
-It's Josh from Big Eatsy.
-Are you going live without me?
326
00:17:31,967 --> 00:17:33,510
I know you wanted to hear about
327
00:17:33,510 --> 00:17:36,304
the new fast cash Cronut place
in the Loft District,
328
00:17:36,304 --> 00:17:37,889
but I got a weird one for you.
329
00:17:49,067 --> 00:17:50,068
Hey.
330
00:17:52,028 --> 00:17:53,154
Are you okay?
331
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:58,076
-Nosebleeds.
-It's house painting with red paint.
332
00:17:58,076 --> 00:18:00,745
We were painting the kitchen blood colors?
333
00:18:06,084 --> 00:18:07,460
What can I get for you guys?
334
00:18:07,460 --> 00:18:09,045
Do you have alcohol?
335
00:18:09,045 --> 00:18:11,464
-Two, please.
-Two.
336
00:18:11,464 --> 00:18:12,757
Two what?
337
00:18:12,757 --> 00:18:15,385
Two alcohols, please.
Thank you so much.
338
00:18:16,177 --> 00:18:18,471
We don't serve alcohol.
339
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:24,936
We need to call my brother.
340
00:18:24,936 --> 00:18:26,521
Why would we do that?
341
00:18:26,521 --> 00:18:28,565
Because he's well-connected.
342
00:18:28,565 --> 00:18:30,400
He knows all the best lawyers.
343
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,986
Right, 'cause Devon knows everybody.
344
00:18:32,986 --> 00:18:34,446
What does that mean?
345
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:36,781
He said he knew Klay Thompson.
346
00:18:36,781 --> 00:18:39,075
-He does know Klay Thompson.
-He does not know Klay Thompson.
347
00:18:39,075 --> 00:18:41,286
-He showed me the photos.
-That was a meet-and-greet.
348
00:18:41,286 --> 00:18:43,079
There was a whole line, okay?
349
00:18:43,079 --> 00:18:45,415
He was wearing a Klay Thompson jersey.
350
00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:47,751
Friends don't wear their friends' jerseys.
351
00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:51,004
You brought him up.
352
00:18:52,797 --> 00:18:54,299
We have to go to the police.
353
00:18:55,050 --> 00:18:57,719
Us?
You and me?
354
00:18:58,928 --> 00:19:00,847
How do you think that's gonna go?
355
00:19:00,847 --> 00:19:03,224
-It's the best bad idea.
-No, it's not.
356
00:19:03,224 --> 00:19:05,268
They're gonna arrest us in two seconds.
357
00:19:05,268 --> 00:19:06,895
Maybe we just tell them the truth.
358
00:19:06,895 --> 00:19:08,730
Do you think the police
care about the truth?
359
00:19:08,730 --> 00:19:11,358
You think they'll give us
the benefit of the doubt?
360
00:19:11,358 --> 00:19:15,028
-But what else?
-Jibran, the truth sounds crazy.
361
00:19:16,154 --> 00:19:18,406
What are you gonna say to them?
362
00:19:18,406 --> 00:19:20,116
"Hello, Officer.
363
00:19:20,116 --> 00:19:22,827
We are turning ourselves in for now,
364
00:19:22,827 --> 00:19:25,413
because we have nothing to hide."
365
00:19:25,413 --> 00:19:27,499
"Then Why'd you run
from the scene of the crime?"
366
00:19:27,499 --> 00:19:30,710
"Good question, Officer.
That's why you're good at your job.
367
00:19:31,503 --> 00:19:34,089
It's because we looked guilty.
368
00:19:34,089 --> 00:19:37,300
Which was scary for us,
because we are not guilty.
369
00:19:37,300 --> 00:19:39,928
So, in a way, us running
only proves that we are--"
370
00:19:39,928 --> 00:19:42,180
"That's me covering up my bodycam,
371
00:19:42,180 --> 00:19:45,100
so I can beat your ass, you fucking liar."
372
00:19:45,100 --> 00:19:47,560
-Okay. Okay. Done?
-Nope.
373
00:19:49,771 --> 00:19:52,107
That was me throwing the book at you.
374
00:19:52,107 --> 00:19:54,901
You know there's
no real actual book, right?
375
00:19:54,901 --> 00:19:56,903
"So you left a man dead in the street?"
376
00:19:56,903 --> 00:19:59,531
-"We did not leave him dead."
-"And didn't call the police?"
377
00:19:59,531 --> 00:20:01,658
"Because there was no time,
because we had to--"
378
00:20:01,658 --> 00:20:03,868
"Brown man, you sound crazy."
379
00:20:03,868 --> 00:20:05,829
-"Don't say that."
-"You look like a murderer to me."
380
00:20:05,829 --> 00:20:08,039
-"Don't say that."
-"Look at your murderous beard
381
00:20:08,039 --> 00:20:09,582
and your murderous brow."
382
00:20:09,582 --> 00:20:11,042
You said you liked the beard.
383
00:20:11,042 --> 00:20:13,586
Your beard looks like murder.
384
00:20:19,342 --> 00:20:21,761
-Don't.
-Hello?
385
00:20:21,761 --> 00:20:23,263
Leilani, where the fuck are you guys?
386
00:20:23,263 --> 00:20:25,849
I'm sorry. We bumped into an old friend.
387
00:20:25,849 --> 00:20:27,809
-And... ..
-Still at home.
388
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:30,186
...we were going back and forth
with him several times.
389
00:20:30,186 --> 00:20:32,689
Can you tell them to grab some wine?
We don't have any white for Evonne.
390
00:20:32,689 --> 00:20:35,692
Hey, can you pick up a bottle of pinot?
Grigio, not noir.
391
00:20:35,692 --> 00:20:38,236
You know what Evonne's like
when she drinks tequila.
392
00:20:38,236 --> 00:20:40,321
Sure, we'll bring a bottle over.
393
00:20:40,321 --> 00:20:41,990
Great. See you in a bit.
394
00:20:42,824 --> 00:20:46,119
-What's going on?
-They're acting weird.
395
00:20:46,119 --> 00:20:50,123
Oh, my God.
Babe, what if they got engaged?
396
00:20:50,123 --> 00:20:52,667
How you know it's nice to meet me?
What if I'm an asshole?
397
00:20:53,585 --> 00:20:54,753
You're hilarious.
398
00:20:55,837 --> 00:20:57,255
Bobby wanted--
399
00:20:57,255 --> 00:20:59,466
They want us to bring
a bottle over to dinner.
400
00:20:59,466 --> 00:21:01,301
Fine. Probably pick up a pinot
on the way to prison.
401
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:14,063
This silver milk-shake container
is such a thing, you know?
402
00:21:14,063 --> 00:21:15,774
They're always like, "We made too much,
403
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:18,026
so here's the extra
and the container that we made it in."
404
00:21:18,026 --> 00:21:19,986
They can't just measure it out?
405
00:21:22,071 --> 00:21:24,282
They don't do that with other stuff.
406
00:21:24,282 --> 00:21:26,201
They're not like, "Well, here's spaghetti
407
00:21:26,201 --> 00:21:28,328
and here's some more
spaghetti on the side.
408
00:21:28,328 --> 00:21:30,580
We made too much for the spaghetti plate.
409
00:21:30,580 --> 00:21:32,457
Here's soup.
410
00:21:32,457 --> 00:21:35,835
We didn't wanna measure it out early on,
and here we are."
411
00:21:36,544 --> 00:21:37,796
Like, what the fuck?
412
00:21:37,796 --> 00:21:40,089
-It's crazy.
-It's so crazy.
413
00:21:40,089 --> 00:21:43,343
Not the extra milk-shake container.
414
00:21:52,143 --> 00:21:54,854
Is this Leilani Brooks?
415
00:21:55,605 --> 00:21:56,856
Who is this?
416
00:21:56,856 --> 00:21:59,317
This is Detective Mary Martin
of the New Orleans PD.
417
00:21:59,317 --> 00:22:00,735
Hi, Detective.
418
00:22:00,735 --> 00:22:03,238
Have you driven your vehicle
at any time today?
419
00:22:04,322 --> 00:22:07,575
No, not today.
Mm-mmm.
420
00:22:07,575 --> 00:22:10,036
-Can I ask where you are now?
-She's asking where I am now.
421
00:22:10,036 --> 00:22:11,496
-Hang up.
-Home.
422
00:22:11,496 --> 00:22:13,748
I'm home. Just chilling.
423
00:22:13,748 --> 00:22:15,875
Are you saying that your vehicle
is at home as well?
424
00:22:15,875 --> 00:22:18,211
-Hang up.
-Yes!
425
00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:20,839
If I just go to my window right now,
I should see--
426
00:22:21,673 --> 00:22:23,049
Oh, my God.
427
00:22:23,049 --> 00:22:25,343
Honey, wasn't our car parked outside?
428
00:22:25,343 --> 00:22:27,136
This is crazy, Detective.
429
00:22:27,136 --> 00:22:29,305
I must have left the keys in the ignition.
430
00:22:29,305 --> 00:22:30,974
Can I get you two anything else?
431
00:22:30,974 --> 00:22:32,684
Is that a waitress?
432
00:22:32,684 --> 00:22:34,644
Ma'am, where are you right now?
433
00:22:35,979 --> 00:22:38,565
-Okay. I'll get your check.
-Thank you.
434
00:22:40,650 --> 00:22:43,319
One question.
What the fuck?
435
00:22:43,319 --> 00:22:45,822
-I'm trying to help.
-No, that was not--
436
00:22:45,822 --> 00:22:48,032
What?
You're so dramatic.
437
00:22:49,158 --> 00:22:50,618
What? What do I--
What?
438
00:22:50,618 --> 00:22:51,703
Po-po.
439
00:22:51,703 --> 00:22:52,954
Po-po?
440
00:22:52,954 --> 00:22:54,497
-Po-po.
-What?
441
00:23:01,754 --> 00:23:04,549
-Did you just wave?
-I waved at the police.
442
00:23:04,549 --> 00:23:07,427
-Why would you do that?
-Because I didn't want to seem suspicious.
443
00:23:07,427 --> 00:23:09,262
That is Suspicion 101.
444
00:23:12,015 --> 00:23:13,349
We don't--
445
00:23:14,684 --> 00:23:18,771
You look so shady.
Stop that! Stop!
446
00:23:21,232 --> 00:23:23,860
Who counts money--
No one counts money like that.
447
00:23:30,533 --> 00:23:31,743
Thank you.
448
00:23:38,958 --> 00:23:40,376
Hey, you two.
449
00:23:45,089 --> 00:23:46,424
Forgot your phone.
450
00:23:49,552 --> 00:23:51,721
-Oh, God.
-Yeah.
451
00:23:51,721 --> 00:23:54,223
-We're so stupid.
-Thank you. Stupid.
452
00:23:54,223 --> 00:23:56,017
-Forgot my phone!
-That's my phone!
453
00:23:56,017 --> 00:23:58,728
-Our phone. We share a phone.
-We share a phone.
454
00:23:58,728 --> 00:24:01,105
-He cheats on me and I don't trust him.
-Yeah.
455
00:24:01,105 --> 00:24:02,649
It's not a crime though, right?
456
00:24:02,649 --> 00:24:06,694
She's like, "You're breaking my heart,
Jeffrey... O'Malley."
457
00:24:08,071 --> 00:24:09,489
-Bye.
-At ease.
458
00:24:11,324 --> 00:24:14,369
-We're so fucked!
-No, we're not.
459
00:24:15,370 --> 00:24:17,330
We just have to lay low
460
00:24:17,330 --> 00:24:20,583
and keep a low profile
until this blows over.
461
00:24:20,583 --> 00:24:21,709
I don't think--
462
00:24:22,877 --> 00:24:26,005
-Murders don't blow over, Lei.
-Yes, they do.
463
00:24:26,005 --> 00:24:28,549
If the police find the guy
that they're looking for.
464
00:24:28,549 --> 00:24:30,510
You and me are the guy
they're looking for.
465
00:24:30,510 --> 00:24:33,179
You know that song
"Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do"?
466
00:24:33,179 --> 00:24:35,598
We're the bad boys.
What are we gonna do?
467
00:24:35,598 --> 00:24:37,475
Yeah, I know that song
"Who Let the Dogs Out."
468
00:24:37,475 --> 00:24:39,352
And I'm always like,
who did let the dogs out?
469
00:24:39,352 --> 00:24:41,312
Are we just talking about
songs that we remember?
470
00:24:41,312 --> 00:24:42,313
You started it.
471
00:24:44,816 --> 00:24:46,526
Bicycle guy's phone bing-bonged.
472
00:24:46,526 --> 00:24:48,653
It just made a bing-bong sound.
473
00:24:48,653 --> 00:24:51,781
-Don't touch it! That's evidence!
-I've been touching it the whole time.
474
00:24:53,616 --> 00:24:56,869
It's his calendar.
"Edie at Dragon's Den."
475
00:24:56,869 --> 00:25:01,040
Wait. This Edie person
obviously knows Bicycle, right?
476
00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:02,375
What?
477
00:25:02,375 --> 00:25:05,628
So what if she knows
who wanted to kill Bicycle?
478
00:25:05,628 --> 00:25:09,757
Okay, so you're suggesting
we actually go out there and solve a--
479
00:25:09,757 --> 00:25:11,676
Murder?
That's what you're suggesting?
480
00:25:11,676 --> 00:25:13,553
Kinda.
481
00:25:13,553 --> 00:25:16,264
Who the fuck do you think we are?
Hobbs and Shaw?
482
00:25:16,264 --> 00:25:19,017
We're not even a couple.
We couldn't figure out our relationship.
483
00:25:19,017 --> 00:25:21,519
You think that we're gonna
figure out who killed Bicycle?
484
00:25:25,064 --> 00:25:26,399
We did break up, right?
485
00:25:28,609 --> 00:25:29,736
Yeah.
486
00:25:29,736 --> 00:25:30,862
Okay.
487
00:25:32,447 --> 00:25:35,825
Jibran, all we need is a name.
We get Mustache's name,
488
00:25:35,825 --> 00:25:38,327
we take it to the police,
and then we're in the clear.
489
00:25:38,327 --> 00:25:40,580
We have ten minutes to get there.
490
00:25:40,580 --> 00:25:43,249
I don't think this is a good idea at all.
491
00:25:43,249 --> 00:25:46,919
I know you're scared, Ji,
and I'm scared, too. But...
492
00:25:49,964 --> 00:25:51,340
What a sweet baby.
493
00:25:53,259 --> 00:25:56,554
Can we try Edie?
See if she can help us?
494
00:25:58,306 --> 00:26:00,224
Okay. But if you're wrong
495
00:26:00,224 --> 00:26:02,185
and we spend the rest of our lives
on death row,
496
00:26:02,185 --> 00:26:03,936
I'm gonna be so pissed at you.
497
00:26:03,936 --> 00:26:04,979
That's fair.
498
00:26:08,649 --> 00:26:11,903
Oh, my God. It's the police.
499
00:26:11,903 --> 00:26:14,739
-Don't answer it, ignore it.
-Right, right, right.
500
00:26:14,739 --> 00:26:16,282
Right, right.
501
00:26:17,575 --> 00:26:19,744
Why do they still have
the cigarette lighter?
502
00:26:19,744 --> 00:26:22,955
Like, just make it a power outlet
at this point, you know?
503
00:26:22,955 --> 00:26:24,791
Like, who's like,
"I'm operating a vehicle,
504
00:26:24,791 --> 00:26:26,834
I want to introduce fire into this--"
505
00:26:26,834 --> 00:26:28,961
Jibran, please.
No more milk-shake monologues,
506
00:26:28,961 --> 00:26:31,255
-okay?
-Right.
507
00:26:31,255 --> 00:26:33,216
Excuse me, sir,
this isn't our destination.
508
00:26:37,261 --> 00:26:39,347
-Are you Leon?
-Yes, sir.
509
00:26:39,347 --> 00:26:40,556
Dope.
510
00:26:45,311 --> 00:26:46,896
You ordered a Lyft share.
511
00:26:46,896 --> 00:26:49,565
I just have it set
on that option by default.
512
00:26:51,109 --> 00:26:53,861
You're amazing.
513
00:26:53,861 --> 00:26:56,906
-You're amazing.
-But you're like amazing-amazing.
514
00:26:56,906 --> 00:26:59,951
-No, you are.
-I miss you when we're together.
515
00:26:59,951 --> 00:27:01,577
Like, right this second,
516
00:27:01,577 --> 00:27:04,580
I am sitting next to you and I miss you.
517
00:27:04,580 --> 00:27:06,124
Oh, baby.
518
00:27:06,124 --> 00:27:09,710
We're gonna go to this spot
and find this Edie person
519
00:27:09,710 --> 00:27:11,504
and then see what happens.
520
00:27:13,131 --> 00:27:15,466
How are we gonna know who Edie is?
521
00:27:15,466 --> 00:27:18,469
-We go up to her and ask if--
-Where'd you get that tattoo?
522
00:27:19,971 --> 00:27:22,598
I love you more than I love my mom!
523
00:27:22,598 --> 00:27:24,642
Shut the fuck up! Okay?
524
00:27:24,642 --> 00:27:29,147
It's all kissy and huggy now,
but it all comes crashing down. Okay?
525
00:27:34,193 --> 00:27:37,029
All right,
here we go into the Dragon's Den.
526
00:27:37,029 --> 00:27:38,739
It'll be fine.
We got this.
527
00:27:42,702 --> 00:27:46,164
It's not that bad.
We just gotta find her.
528
00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:47,623
Okay.
Yeah.
529
00:27:48,499 --> 00:27:51,502
We just act super normal, okay?
530
00:27:51,502 --> 00:27:55,923
Yeah. We're normal.
Just normal people.
531
00:27:57,091 --> 00:27:58,676
Coming to a bar.
532
00:28:04,640 --> 00:28:06,225
We should not have come here.
533
00:28:06,225 --> 00:28:09,061
You say that anytime
we go anywhere with people.
534
00:28:09,061 --> 00:28:11,355
I was talking about
the sense of impending doom
535
00:28:11,355 --> 00:28:13,691
that's growing in the pit
of my stomach right now!
536
00:28:13,691 --> 00:28:17,612
I'm just saying. If I never made plans,
we would never go anywhere.
537
00:28:17,612 --> 00:28:20,198
Congratulations,
you made plans and this happened.
538
00:28:35,630 --> 00:28:38,174
-Okay, act normal.
-Love dancing.
539
00:28:38,174 --> 00:28:39,884
Normal-people shit.
540
00:28:49,518 --> 00:28:51,103
That has to be her.
541
00:28:51,103 --> 00:28:52,813
Okay, what do we do?
542
00:28:53,898 --> 00:28:55,816
We should go over there, right?
543
00:29:12,083 --> 00:29:13,084
Edie?
544
00:29:14,043 --> 00:29:16,295
Edie.
Edie?
545
00:29:17,546 --> 00:29:19,340
Stop talking.
546
00:29:19,340 --> 00:29:20,716
Come with me.
547
00:29:24,345 --> 00:29:26,931
Who are you?
He sent you?
548
00:29:26,931 --> 00:29:30,559
Yeah.
Jibran, why don't you explain?
549
00:29:31,644 --> 00:29:33,729
There's sort of not a good starting point.
550
00:29:33,729 --> 00:29:36,023
He wants to be unprofessional
and send two strangers
551
00:29:36,023 --> 00:29:38,109
instead of coming himself, that's fine.
552
00:29:38,109 --> 00:29:39,902
Let's just do this and be done with it.
553
00:29:39,902 --> 00:29:42,280
We wanted to know
if you know a guy with a mustache.
554
00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:45,366
-We don't know what's going on.
-Know a guy with a mustache?
555
00:29:45,366 --> 00:29:47,868
Okay, drop the act.
It's unbecoming.
556
00:29:47,868 --> 00:29:49,870
There's a way to do this
that's respectable.
557
00:29:54,292 --> 00:29:56,711
And this?
This is not that.
558
00:30:06,387 --> 00:30:08,639
Hand 'em over and this can all end.
559
00:30:08,639 --> 00:30:10,057
-What?
-Oh, no.
560
00:30:10,057 --> 00:30:12,476
The pictures. Give me the envelope.
561
00:30:12,476 --> 00:30:13,811
What pictures?
562
00:30:13,811 --> 00:30:15,896
-Oh, no.
-You guys think you're the only ones
563
00:30:15,896 --> 00:30:17,690
who can dig up a little dirt?
564
00:30:19,317 --> 00:30:20,901
I know who your boss is.
565
00:30:20,901 --> 00:30:23,029
We don't have a boss.
We don't work together.
566
00:30:23,029 --> 00:30:25,156
We don't know what pictures
you're talking about.
567
00:30:25,156 --> 00:30:27,241
I'm a documentary filmmaker,
she works at an ad agency.
568
00:30:27,241 --> 00:30:30,119
Remember that commercial where the guy's
a nerd and then he uses this bodywash
569
00:30:30,119 --> 00:30:31,787
and all the girls, like, wanna fuck him?
570
00:30:31,787 --> 00:30:33,789
-That was her idea!
-That was my idea.
571
00:30:33,789 --> 00:30:36,292
It was based on a true story.
This guy was nerdy at my college,
572
00:30:36,292 --> 00:30:38,627
and he would smell good
and then I was like, "I like him now."
573
00:30:38,627 --> 00:30:40,546
She didn't like the way
a guy looked at college,
574
00:30:40,546 --> 00:30:42,590
and then he smelled better
and then she fucked him!
575
00:30:42,590 --> 00:30:45,926
-But it's fine and we don't know anything!
-Yeah, right.
576
00:30:45,926 --> 00:30:48,888
You showed up at the designated time
and place of the exchange.
577
00:30:48,888 --> 00:30:51,390
Yeah, because this guy's phone
bing-bonged your name!
578
00:30:51,390 --> 00:30:54,268
We're trying to go to our friend's party.
We have nothing to do with anything.
579
00:30:54,268 --> 00:30:56,354
We just answered a bing-bong!
580
00:30:58,856 --> 00:31:00,149
Jibran.
Mm-mmm.
581
00:31:00,858 --> 00:31:03,235
-She's not buying it.
-Okay.
582
00:31:03,235 --> 00:31:05,196
Let's take the guesswork out here.
583
00:31:05,196 --> 00:31:08,324
You said that
this gentleman's not your boss
584
00:31:08,324 --> 00:31:10,493
-and you don't even know him?
-No.
585
00:31:10,493 --> 00:31:13,329
Why don't we just call him
and see what he has to say?
586
00:31:13,329 --> 00:31:14,955
-Okay. Great.
-Yeah, yeah, yeah, call him.
587
00:31:20,795 --> 00:31:22,838
Oh, no.
588
00:31:22,838 --> 00:31:24,590
It's not what you think.
589
00:31:24,590 --> 00:31:27,176
Don't pee down my back
and tell me it's raining.
590
00:31:27,176 --> 00:31:28,969
-Why would we do that?
-We would never do that.
591
00:31:28,969 --> 00:31:31,055
If she pees down your back,
she's gonna say it's pee.
592
00:31:31,055 --> 00:31:33,724
You think you can fuck with a
congressman and get away with it?
593
00:31:33,724 --> 00:31:35,267
You got another thing coming.
594
00:31:37,686 --> 00:31:39,688
-Oh, no!
-What the fuck?
595
00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:43,734
Did you just tell them I'm a congressman?
596
00:31:43,734 --> 00:31:45,611
-Come here. Real quick.
597
00:31:47,363 --> 00:31:48,739
I'll be right back.
598
00:31:52,201 --> 00:31:54,578
What's happening?
Can you get out?
599
00:31:54,578 --> 00:31:56,455
This is fucking insane.
600
00:31:56,455 --> 00:31:57,832
Take that damn mask off, Brett.
601
00:31:57,832 --> 00:31:59,625
Are you okay?
602
00:31:59,625 --> 00:32:02,128
Well, it still doesn't seem
like a good idea.
603
00:32:02,128 --> 00:32:06,090
My husband. He was just about to get me
my pan. Right, hon?
604
00:32:06,090 --> 00:32:08,092
I thought we agreed
we weren't gonna do the pan.
605
00:32:08,092 --> 00:32:10,845
You go get me my goddamn pan!
606
00:32:10,845 --> 00:32:13,347
Hey, just to clarify,
we're not blackmailing anybody.
607
00:32:13,347 --> 00:32:14,723
Excuse me, what is "the pan"?
608
00:32:14,723 --> 00:32:18,394
You tried to fuck us.
Now you're gonna get fucked.
609
00:32:18,394 --> 00:32:21,021
Your premise is wrong
because we didn't try to fuck you.
610
00:32:21,021 --> 00:32:22,773
-We don't wanna get fucked.
-No.
611
00:32:25,276 --> 00:32:29,738
I just love the smell
of sizzling bacon, don't you?
612
00:32:29,738 --> 00:32:32,658
The only problem is the grease!
613
00:32:32,658 --> 00:32:35,202
Y'all ever see a bad grease burn?
614
00:32:35,202 --> 00:32:38,539
It is remarkable the damage
a little hot oil can do.
615
00:32:38,539 --> 00:32:41,208
I'm gonna give you both a choice, okay?
616
00:32:41,208 --> 00:32:44,879
All the grease in this pan,
617
00:32:44,879 --> 00:32:48,299
or what's behind this door.
618
00:32:48,299 --> 00:32:50,384
-What?
-I said,
619
00:32:50,384 --> 00:32:53,762
bacon grease, or door.
620
00:32:53,762 --> 00:32:55,055
It's up to you.
621
00:32:55,055 --> 00:32:57,683
And you're first, Mr. Bing-Bong.
622
00:32:57,683 --> 00:32:59,393
Take the grease.
623
00:32:59,393 --> 00:33:02,021
Are you serious? It's boiling hot grease.
624
00:33:02,021 --> 00:33:05,399
And she could pour the grease on my face!
Edie, may I ask a question?
625
00:33:05,399 --> 00:33:07,485
Do I get to know
prior to making my decision
626
00:33:07,485 --> 00:33:09,069
where you'll be pouring the grease?
627
00:33:09,069 --> 00:33:12,114
Yeah, it'll probably
most definitely be your face.
628
00:33:12,114 --> 00:33:13,449
Thank you.
629
00:33:13,449 --> 00:33:15,075
She said probably my face.
630
00:33:15,075 --> 00:33:18,412
She's obviously trying to scare you
into choosing something worse.
631
00:33:18,412 --> 00:33:20,706
We're single now. I have to
go out into the dating world.
632
00:33:20,706 --> 00:33:22,249
How do you think I'm gonna do on Bumble?
633
00:33:22,249 --> 00:33:24,752
-Scars are super sexy.
-You like burn scars?
634
00:33:24,752 --> 00:33:27,213
After this, I'm gonna seek out a guy
with a burnt face.
635
00:33:27,213 --> 00:33:30,216
You promise?
I'm gonna stalk your Facebook so hard.
636
00:33:30,216 --> 00:33:33,010
And if you're not with a fucking burn victim,
I'm gonna be so very upset.
637
00:33:33,010 --> 00:33:35,638
Thanks for reminding me to block you.
I'm blocking you after this.
638
00:33:35,638 --> 00:33:38,557
Let's make a decision here.
My husband and I have plans tonight.
639
00:33:38,557 --> 00:33:41,519
I'll go with not the grease.
I'll go with the door.
640
00:33:41,519 --> 00:33:43,270
-Jibran!
-Door it is.
641
00:33:43,270 --> 00:33:45,606
Tell 'em what they've won.
642
00:33:45,606 --> 00:33:47,316
-No! Plant your feet!
-I am!
643
00:33:47,316 --> 00:33:49,068
Stop it!
Leave him alone!
644
00:33:49,068 --> 00:33:51,278
-Open the door.
-Yep.
645
00:33:57,368 --> 00:33:58,953
Is it gonna shit on me?
646
00:34:08,379 --> 00:34:10,089
Take the grease.
647
00:34:10,089 --> 00:34:11,507
It's your turn, little missy.
648
00:34:11,507 --> 00:34:13,300
The grease! I take the grease!
649
00:34:13,300 --> 00:34:15,261
A lady who knows what she wants.
650
00:34:18,180 --> 00:34:20,391
No, no, no!
No, no, no!
651
00:34:23,477 --> 00:34:25,062
No, no, no, no, no!
652
00:34:25,062 --> 00:34:26,438
Okay, let's see--
653
00:34:26,438 --> 00:34:27,856
No!
654
00:34:31,569 --> 00:34:33,904
Help, help, help, help!
655
00:34:33,904 --> 00:34:36,949
-Oh, God. Honey, are you all right?
-No!
656
00:34:38,993 --> 00:34:39,994
-Okay?
-Yeah.
657
00:34:49,420 --> 00:34:51,213
Stay back! Stay back!
You stay back!
658
00:34:51,213 --> 00:34:52,506
-You ready?
-Yeah.
659
00:34:52,506 --> 00:34:54,133
One, two, three--
660
00:34:54,133 --> 00:34:56,468
Where are you going?
661
00:34:58,554 --> 00:35:00,681
-They're getting away!
-Honey!
662
00:35:00,681 --> 00:35:03,100
-Lift it up! I gotta get him.
-Oh, my God. My arm!
663
00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:04,101
Honey, no!
664
00:35:08,897 --> 00:35:11,942
-You okay? You okay?
-Yeah. My shoe got stuck.
665
00:35:14,361 --> 00:35:15,362
Come on.
666
00:35:18,032 --> 00:35:20,993
-This place gives me the creeps.
-Fucking scary.
667
00:35:22,703 --> 00:35:25,080
- You there!
-Was that for us?
668
00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:26,915
Oh, my God.
669
00:35:26,915 --> 00:35:28,000
Stop!
670
00:35:30,085 --> 00:35:32,880
We are Penworth Estate security.
671
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:35,341
Surrender yourselves mmediately.
672
00:35:35,341 --> 00:35:39,637
Surrender immediately. You are
trespassing on Penworth Estate property.
673
00:35:42,431 --> 00:35:44,391
Oh, you're lucky.
674
00:35:45,225 --> 00:35:47,269
Our sovereignty ends right here.
675
00:35:47,269 --> 00:35:49,938
You step on
Penworth Estates property again,
676
00:35:49,938 --> 00:35:51,649
we're gonna punish you
677
00:35:51,649 --> 00:35:54,026
to the best of our abilities.
678
00:35:57,029 --> 00:35:58,238
That's right, Bruce.
679
00:36:01,158 --> 00:36:02,242
Shit.
680
00:36:30,270 --> 00:36:31,939
What the fuck just happened?
681
00:36:31,939 --> 00:36:34,858
I said, "One, two, three," and you ran.
682
00:36:34,858 --> 00:36:36,694
Yeah, 'cause that's
what you did in the alley.
683
00:36:36,694 --> 00:36:38,696
You set a precedent.
That's what I was going off of.
684
00:36:38,696 --> 00:36:40,155
I assumed you assumed
685
00:36:40,155 --> 00:36:42,658
this time it would be like,
"One, two, three, attack.“
686
00:36:42,658 --> 00:36:44,201
Why would I assume that?
687
00:36:44,201 --> 00:36:46,662
Because we had weapons?
I don't know.
688
00:36:46,662 --> 00:36:48,747
I never want to see a
horse again in my life.
689
00:36:55,462 --> 00:36:56,463
Thank you.
690
00:37:04,596 --> 00:37:06,473
What, I look stupid?
691
00:37:06,473 --> 00:37:08,267
Kinda like unicorn throw-up?
692
00:37:08,267 --> 00:37:09,852
No, you look...
693
00:37:10,644 --> 00:37:11,937
the opposite.
694
00:37:12,896 --> 00:37:14,064
Unstupid.
695
00:37:19,653 --> 00:37:20,696
Are you okay?
696
00:37:21,947 --> 00:37:23,115
Yeah, I'm fine.
697
00:37:24,158 --> 00:37:26,910
It just hurts a lot
right where the horse kicked me.
698
00:37:30,205 --> 00:37:31,331
Come with me.
699
00:37:33,459 --> 00:37:34,835
It looks okay?
700
00:37:34,835 --> 00:37:36,462
-If you could...
-Sorry.
701
00:37:36,462 --> 00:37:38,547
...stop tapping right where the wound is.
702
00:37:38,547 --> 00:37:40,090
I'm just trying to help.
703
00:37:40,090 --> 00:37:41,550
Okay.
704
00:37:41,550 --> 00:37:43,093
Come on, let's do this.
705
00:37:43,093 --> 00:37:45,095
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
706
00:37:48,849 --> 00:37:52,144
I can't. I'm just gonna wear this shirt
for the rest of my life.
707
00:37:52,144 --> 00:37:54,021
No, you're not.
Stand up.
708
00:37:56,940 --> 00:37:58,692
Raise your arms.
709
00:38:02,112 --> 00:38:04,656
Okay. One, two, three.
710
00:38:14,416 --> 00:38:17,211
Can I just say this is the most
batshit crazy night ever?
711
00:38:17,211 --> 00:38:20,172
You've never been framed for murder
and tortured with bacon grease?
712
00:38:21,965 --> 00:38:23,175
Really?
713
00:38:23,175 --> 00:38:25,010
-It just--
-Really?
714
00:38:25,010 --> 00:38:27,471
-Just be so gentle. Just--
-Okay, I'm sorry.
715
00:38:29,264 --> 00:38:30,599
I didn't even touch you.
716
00:38:43,654 --> 00:38:45,948
I ordered us a Lyft.
717
00:38:45,948 --> 00:38:47,866
I hope you changed your settings.
718
00:38:59,378 --> 00:39:01,588
You probably don't remember this, but,
719
00:39:02,756 --> 00:39:06,051
our first date, that restaurant,
720
00:39:06,051 --> 00:39:08,929
there was this couple sitting next to us,
721
00:39:08,929 --> 00:39:11,765
-and they didn't talk the whole--
-I remember them.
722
00:39:11,765 --> 00:39:13,725
-You do?
-Yeah.
723
00:39:13,725 --> 00:39:16,103
They didn't say anything to each other
the entire time.
724
00:39:16,103 --> 00:39:18,272
You know, I think about them all the time.
725
00:39:19,147 --> 00:39:22,317
'Cause I was looking at them
like I never want to be that couple,
726
00:39:22,317 --> 00:39:24,570
you know, that runs out of stuff
to talk about.
727
00:39:24,570 --> 00:39:26,071
But the more I think about them,
728
00:39:26,071 --> 00:39:27,614
the more I'm like...
729
00:39:28,782 --> 00:39:30,576
maybe they weren't miserable.
730
00:39:30,576 --> 00:39:32,828
You know?
Maybe they were just
731
00:39:32,828 --> 00:39:34,830
comfortable with each other.
732
00:39:41,545 --> 00:39:44,464
So my theory about Edie
obviously didn't pan out.
733
00:39:46,675 --> 00:39:49,428
Maybe you were right.
Maybe we should just go to the cops.
734
00:39:50,971 --> 00:39:52,472
I found something.
735
00:39:53,348 --> 00:39:54,474
What?
736
00:39:56,101 --> 00:39:58,604
The piece of paper that Edie had
with Bicycle's number?
737
00:39:58,604 --> 00:40:00,272
It has an address on it, too.
738
00:40:00,272 --> 00:40:02,024
What?
When did you get this?
739
00:40:02,024 --> 00:40:04,067
I was thinking,
maybe Mustache killed Bicycle
740
00:40:04,067 --> 00:40:06,194
because of those pictures
that Edie was talking about.
741
00:40:06,194 --> 00:40:09,114
If we can find those pictures,
figure out what they are,
742
00:40:09,114 --> 00:40:10,699
maybe we can exonerate ourselves.
743
00:40:10,699 --> 00:40:12,826
Mustache was clearly
looking for something,
744
00:40:12,826 --> 00:40:15,245
and Edie was very upset
about those pictures.
745
00:40:15,245 --> 00:40:16,622
-It's a clue, right?
-Yeah!
746
00:40:16,622 --> 00:40:18,123
I did a clue.
747
00:40:20,876 --> 00:40:22,669
Should we go to that address?
748
00:40:23,712 --> 00:40:26,298
You know this is actually illegal, right?
749
00:40:26,298 --> 00:40:28,258
Breaking into Bicycle's house?
750
00:40:29,009 --> 00:40:30,093
Are you sure?
751
00:40:31,261 --> 00:40:33,722
-Are you?
-Yeah.
752
00:40:34,806 --> 00:40:36,433
That's our guy.
753
00:40:42,230 --> 00:40:43,732
Oh, shit.
754
00:40:47,694 --> 00:40:48,779
Shit.
755
00:40:49,947 --> 00:40:51,865
He knows it's us,
he totally knows it's us.
756
00:40:51,865 --> 00:40:53,575
Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
757
00:40:53,575 --> 00:40:56,119
Shit, he's totally onto us.
He's on to us, he's on to us.
758
00:41:00,082 --> 00:41:01,667
He's just a regular racist.
759
00:41:01,667 --> 00:41:03,710
-Thank God.
-Let's go.
760
00:41:17,975 --> 00:41:19,142
Shit.
761
00:41:20,268 --> 00:41:22,646
-What?
-How are we gonna get up there?
762
00:41:22,646 --> 00:41:24,106
What?
You just--
763
00:41:24,856 --> 00:41:26,858
Did you think it was one
of those "Men Only" doors?
764
00:41:26,858 --> 00:41:27,859
Sorry.
765
00:41:29,319 --> 00:41:31,071
Maybe...
766
00:41:31,071 --> 00:41:33,407
Maybe there's one of those
catwalk things around the side--
767
00:41:33,407 --> 00:41:35,909
A "catwalk"?
You mean like for fashion shows?
768
00:41:35,909 --> 00:41:37,452
Do you mean a fire escape?
769
00:41:38,829 --> 00:41:40,330
Why are you making jokes?
This is serious.
770
00:41:40,330 --> 00:41:41,415
Okay. Okay.
771
00:41:42,207 --> 00:41:45,085
Yeah. Break the glass. You go.
772
00:41:45,085 --> 00:41:46,628
-I'm wearing heels.
-You're wearing heels.
773
00:41:46,628 --> 00:41:48,797
Right. The ice pick part
will stab the glass--
774
00:41:48,797 --> 00:41:51,633
The "ice pick part"?
Do you mean the heel?
775
00:41:51,633 --> 00:41:55,053
Yes, the pointy heel part of the shoe
will break the glass. It'll go through it.
776
00:41:55,053 --> 00:41:59,224
No, no. Use your shoulders.
Break the glass.
777
00:41:59,224 --> 00:42:01,101
I just got kicked by a horse.
778
00:42:01,101 --> 00:42:03,645
Can I take five minutes off from,
like, bashing myself?
779
00:42:03,645 --> 00:42:05,147
-Okay, I'm sorry.
-Okay.
780
00:42:08,108 --> 00:42:10,235
I'm just concerned the heel's
just gonna snap off.
781
00:42:10,235 --> 00:42:11,945
No. Not if you do it
exactly perpendicular,
782
00:42:11,945 --> 00:42:13,697
'cause it's a small surface area.
Pressure is--
783
00:42:13,697 --> 00:42:15,282
Okay. How do you know that?
784
00:42:16,116 --> 00:42:17,242
MythBusters.
785
00:42:18,493 --> 00:42:20,287
So you do like reality shows.
786
00:42:20,287 --> 00:42:22,456
It's more of a docuseries.
787
00:42:31,089 --> 00:42:33,341
I remember now. That myth got busted.
788
00:42:39,473 --> 00:42:42,392
...reportedly ran over the cyclist
multiple times.
789
00:42:42,392 --> 00:42:45,604
Two witnesses at the scene are currently
being treated for emotional distress.
790
00:42:49,274 --> 00:42:51,443
I think this is it.
791
00:42:58,116 --> 00:42:59,910
What if there's someone in there?
792
00:42:59,910 --> 00:43:01,620
Looks empty.
793
00:43:01,620 --> 00:43:03,413
Right, 'cause it's probably empty
794
00:43:03,413 --> 00:43:05,916
'cause it's Bicycle's apartment and he's...
795
00:43:05,916 --> 00:43:07,042
-Yeah.
-...dead.
796
00:43:07,042 --> 00:43:08,877
Yeah, I was there, Jibran.
797
00:43:08,877 --> 00:43:11,213
-Just try the window.
-Okay.
798
00:43:13,882 --> 00:43:15,550
It's locked.
799
00:43:15,550 --> 00:43:17,010
Okay, your turn to kick it.
800
00:43:17,010 --> 00:43:18,678
My shoes aren't made for kicking.
801
00:43:18,678 --> 00:43:20,347
Yeah, neither were mine.
802
00:43:21,598 --> 00:43:24,101
In my defense, the heel
on the kicking shoe didn't break off,
803
00:43:24,101 --> 00:43:26,770
-it was the heel on the standing--
-I will throw you down this catwalk.
804
00:43:26,770 --> 00:43:29,272
I shouldn't have said that.
Sorry you broke your shoes.
805
00:43:29,272 --> 00:43:30,899
Thank you, they were my date shoes.
806
00:43:30,899 --> 00:43:33,110
I didn't know you had date shoes.
807
00:43:33,110 --> 00:43:34,820
I got 'em for you.
808
00:43:37,823 --> 00:43:41,201
Can you kick this in quietly, please,
since I'm barefoot?
809
00:43:41,201 --> 00:43:43,161
Okay. Okay.
810
00:43:44,496 --> 00:43:46,540
Okay, okay, here we go, here we go.
811
00:43:50,085 --> 00:43:52,879
What? What are you doing?
Are you knocking?
812
00:43:52,879 --> 00:43:55,590
No! I just wanna pull back
so I don't cut up my hand.
813
00:43:55,590 --> 00:43:57,050
I make my living with these hands.
814
00:44:14,484 --> 00:44:15,652
Shit.
815
00:44:25,662 --> 00:44:27,914
Help me, help me, help me.
816
00:44:35,672 --> 00:44:37,757
-You okay?
-Yes, I'm okay.
817
00:44:37,757 --> 00:44:38,758
Okay.
818
00:44:46,725 --> 00:44:49,603
-Wait, you hear that?
-Hear what?
819
00:44:49,603 --> 00:44:50,979
That.
820
00:44:52,272 --> 00:44:53,982
There's, like, music happening.
821
00:44:54,900 --> 00:44:58,236
-We should go in there.
-What? No.
822
00:44:58,236 --> 00:45:00,155
What else are we gonna do?
Go back outside?
823
00:45:00,155 --> 00:45:02,741
Okay, okay, okay.
We're just gonna take a peek.
824
00:45:15,754 --> 00:45:17,214
What is--
825
00:45:17,214 --> 00:45:19,424
No, dude. Shut the fuck up, okay?
826
00:45:19,424 --> 00:45:20,967
I remember this shit plain as day.
827
00:45:20,967 --> 00:45:22,969
You were the one
that was fucking passed out.
828
00:45:22,969 --> 00:45:24,554
Because I--
No.
829
00:45:24,554 --> 00:45:28,433
No, it was me, it was Boyd Ashley.
Ashley.
830
00:45:28,433 --> 00:45:31,269
And I ate that day
'cause I was in a bulking phase.
831
00:45:31,895 --> 00:45:33,939
Who are all these frat dudes?
832
00:45:33,939 --> 00:45:36,358
It's like a roofie laboratory in there.
833
00:45:36,358 --> 00:45:38,777
Those must be the photos
that Edie was talking about.
834
00:45:38,777 --> 00:45:40,862
-Hey, man.
-Leave us alone.
835
00:45:40,862 --> 00:45:43,198
He left one of the envelopes right there.
836
00:45:43,198 --> 00:45:45,659
-We gotta go get it.
-Don't do it!
837
00:45:45,659 --> 00:45:49,621
All those fuckboys are in there.
I don't exactly know what that means.
838
00:45:49,621 --> 00:45:51,539
-Did I use it right?
-No, you didn't.
839
00:45:51,539 --> 00:45:52,999
What are fuckboys?
840
00:45:52,999 --> 00:45:55,043
I'm not having this conversation
right now with you.
841
00:45:55,043 --> 00:45:56,419
No, no, no.
842
00:45:56,419 --> 00:45:58,088
No, it's fine, they can't hear us.
843
00:45:58,088 --> 00:46:00,382
The music's too loud. Watch.
844
00:46:04,344 --> 00:46:07,639
We need to go in there,
grab one of those envelopes,
845
00:46:07,639 --> 00:46:09,349
and figure out what the fuck is going on.
846
00:46:09,349 --> 00:46:11,810
But all the Abercrombie & Fitch
people will see us.
847
00:46:11,810 --> 00:46:14,396
Okay, okay, okay, we gotta...
848
00:46:15,689 --> 00:46:17,732
We gotta come up with a plan
to distract them,
849
00:46:17,732 --> 00:46:19,109
pull them out of there.
850
00:46:19,985 --> 00:46:21,569
I got it. You stay here.
851
00:46:21,569 --> 00:46:23,113
I'm gonna go out, ring the doorbell.
852
00:46:23,113 --> 00:46:24,990
I'm gonna say, "Pizza delivery."
853
00:46:27,242 --> 00:46:28,785
Oh, hey, wassup?
854
00:46:28,785 --> 00:46:30,954
Hey, man, it's been a minute.
855
00:46:30,954 --> 00:46:32,706
Who the fuck are you?
856
00:46:32,706 --> 00:46:34,874
-It's her and me!
-Me and him!
857
00:46:34,874 --> 00:46:36,084
Yes!
858
00:46:36,084 --> 00:46:37,377
From...
859
00:46:41,298 --> 00:46:42,299
Oh, no.
860
00:46:43,300 --> 00:46:45,593
Get him, Jibran! Fuck him up, Jibran!
861
00:46:45,593 --> 00:46:48,888
-Fuck him up! Fuck him up!
-I'm trying! Stop saying that!
862
00:46:51,933 --> 00:46:53,452
Tell me when you want me to jump in.
863
00:46:47,752 --> 00:46:49,587
You want me to jump in?
864
00:46:55,687 --> 00:46:57,897
This isn't Ultimate Fighting, Jibran.
You can't tap out.
865
00:47:04,112 --> 00:47:06,072
I got you!
866
00:47:06,072 --> 00:47:08,825
-You're hitting me!
-You're in the way. Move!
867
00:47:08,825 --> 00:47:10,327
Hey, help!
868
00:47:10,994 --> 00:47:12,037
Take that!
869
00:47:26,051 --> 00:47:27,385
Fuck!
870
00:47:30,388 --> 00:47:32,599
Who the fuck are you?
871
00:47:34,601 --> 00:47:35,810
Who the fuck are we?
872
00:47:36,936 --> 00:47:39,522
We're the people
who want some answers, bitch!
873
00:47:39,522 --> 00:47:43,151
The bigger question is,
who the fuck are you?
874
00:47:43,151 --> 00:47:45,320
What are you doing in my fucking room?
875
00:47:46,863 --> 00:47:48,198
We're here...
876
00:47:50,825 --> 00:47:52,035
Why would you do that?
877
00:47:53,620 --> 00:47:56,748
Yeah. Why would we do that?
878
00:47:56,748 --> 00:47:58,750
That's what you wanna know.
879
00:47:58,750 --> 00:48:00,835
We're asking the questions.
880
00:48:00,835 --> 00:48:04,255
And the answers to our questions
better be answers.
881
00:48:04,255 --> 00:48:07,425
But the answers to your questions
are gonna be my fists.
882
00:48:07,425 --> 00:48:08,802
What?
883
00:48:09,469 --> 00:48:11,638
First of all, motherfucker,
who do you work for?
884
00:48:11,638 --> 00:48:14,140
-Yeah, motherfucker!
-I don't know what you're talking about.
885
00:48:14,140 --> 00:48:16,643
Don't pee down my back
and tell me it's raining.
886
00:48:16,643 --> 00:48:18,645
-Don't do it. Don't do it.
-We don't like it.
887
00:48:18,645 --> 00:48:20,605
-Nope.
-'Cause we know you're lying,
888
00:48:20,605 --> 00:48:23,066
and then we have piss on our backs.
889
00:48:23,066 --> 00:48:24,401
I would never do that.
890
00:48:24,401 --> 00:48:26,236
Tell us what we wanna know.
891
00:48:26,236 --> 00:48:28,113
Yeah. Do you know Bicycle?
892
00:48:28,113 --> 00:48:30,490
Do I know Bicycle?
What does that mean?
893
00:48:30,490 --> 00:48:33,159
-Bicycle! Two wheels?
-Handlebars?
894
00:48:33,159 --> 00:48:35,703
-Sometimes there's a basket.
-And sometimes there's spokes.
895
00:48:35,703 --> 00:48:38,873
Yeah, E.T. rode one and flew in it, bitch!
896
00:48:38,873 --> 00:48:41,000
I know what a bicycle is.
Do you mean Tom?
897
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:43,002
I don't know.
Do we look like a bitch?
898
00:48:43,002 --> 00:48:46,005
Fine. I work for Tom.
Tom rides a bicycle.
899
00:48:46,005 --> 00:48:47,507
He's like a weird environmentalist.
900
00:48:47,507 --> 00:48:51,177
Is environmentalism weird
or is it absolutely necessary?
901
00:48:51,177 --> 00:48:53,304
I recycle everything!
902
00:48:53,304 --> 00:48:56,224
Yeah. Sometimes she'll try and recycle
eggshells and banana peels,
903
00:48:56,224 --> 00:48:58,601
and I'll be like, "That's more compost."
904
00:48:58,601 --> 00:49:00,854
Okay, focus back on me,
little Brett Kavanaugh.
905
00:49:00,854 --> 00:49:02,313
What do you do for Tom?
906
00:49:03,189 --> 00:49:04,482
I'm not supposed to say.
907
00:49:04,482 --> 00:49:06,443
Shut the fuck up and talk,
Chug-A-Lug Chuck!
908
00:49:06,443 --> 00:49:08,862
How am I supposed to shut the fuck up
and talk at the same time?
909
00:49:08,862 --> 00:49:11,030
-That's impossible!
-Figure that shit out!
910
00:49:11,030 --> 00:49:12,115
Figure it out.
911
00:49:12,115 --> 00:49:14,242
Please, all we do is,
we stuff these envelopes.
912
00:49:14,242 --> 00:49:16,453
And then we have to deliver them
to these rich people.
913
00:49:16,453 --> 00:49:17,662
What rich people?
914
00:49:17,662 --> 00:49:19,664
I don't--
I don't know, okay?
915
00:49:19,664 --> 00:49:22,375
He works at this, like, club.
916
00:49:22,375 --> 00:49:24,878
And these people are...
These people are dangerous, okay?
917
00:49:24,878 --> 00:49:27,422
You don't want to fuck
with these people, okay?
918
00:49:28,673 --> 00:49:31,301
I have been 100% cooperating!
919
00:49:31,301 --> 00:49:33,136
I don't like your tone, Date Rape McGee.
920
00:49:38,349 --> 00:49:40,852
So tell us where the fuck this club is.
921
00:49:40,852 --> 00:49:42,729
I don't know.
Because they don't tell us.
922
00:49:42,729 --> 00:49:45,231
They said the less that we know,
the better, okay?
923
00:49:45,231 --> 00:49:46,983
They only contact him on his phone.
924
00:49:50,403 --> 00:49:53,990
Oh, fuck, Jesus!
Please help, help, please!
925
00:49:53,990 --> 00:49:55,492
Intruders, intruders! Help!
926
00:49:56,409 --> 00:49:58,495
-Hi, Steve.
Please, don't--
927
00:50:00,038 --> 00:50:02,665
We gotta get out of here.
Come on, this way.
928
00:50:31,319 --> 00:50:32,779
Shit.
929
00:50:37,242 --> 00:50:38,243
Hello?
930
00:50:40,286 --> 00:50:42,413
Yeah. I took care of the problem.
931
00:50:47,293 --> 00:50:49,128
Yeah, he's quod mortem.
932
00:50:49,921 --> 00:50:51,506
Mm-hmm.
933
00:50:53,424 --> 00:50:54,551
I understand.
934
00:50:56,219 --> 00:50:57,345
Yeah.
935
00:50:58,846 --> 00:51:01,558
Yeah, I'll make sure
it goes smoothly tonight.
936
00:51:01,558 --> 00:51:03,851
You have nothing to worry about, okay?
937
00:51:03,851 --> 00:51:05,228
Hang on a second.
938
00:51:12,443 --> 00:51:13,987
Go, go, go, go, go.
939
00:51:20,118 --> 00:51:22,370
I can hear you better now. Go ahead.
940
00:51:44,434 --> 00:51:46,936
I just saw two people get murdered.
941
00:51:46,936 --> 00:51:50,315
Until yesterday,
I had seen zero people get murdered.
942
00:51:50,315 --> 00:51:52,567
That could've easily been us.
943
00:51:52,567 --> 00:51:54,402
Oh, my God, there's blood on my knuckles.
944
00:51:54,402 --> 00:51:56,946
I left my DNA at the crime scene.
945
00:51:56,946 --> 00:51:59,949
Shit, I left my fingerprints
on Date Rape's face.
946
00:51:59,949 --> 00:52:03,161
And now I feel really bad
for calling him Date Rape.
947
00:52:03,161 --> 00:52:05,371
The police are gonna think
we killed him, too.
948
00:52:05,371 --> 00:52:07,540
They're gonna think we're,
like, serial killers.
949
00:52:08,499 --> 00:52:10,168
We gotta figure this shit out.
950
00:52:11,419 --> 00:52:13,004
Open it.
Open it.
951
00:52:19,510 --> 00:52:21,346
What is this?
952
00:52:24,682 --> 00:52:25,850
What is this?
953
00:52:27,769 --> 00:52:31,022
"Dear Mrs. Burrows,
There are many. We know you are one."
954
00:52:31,022 --> 00:52:32,357
What else?
What else?
955
00:52:36,194 --> 00:52:38,029
That--
That's it.
956
00:52:38,029 --> 00:52:41,199
This is like The Amazing Race,
but with dead people.
957
00:52:41,199 --> 00:52:42,200
Wait.
958
00:52:43,284 --> 00:52:46,371
We have to get into Bicycle's phone.
He said this is how they contact him.
959
00:52:46,371 --> 00:52:48,956
I'm gonna start guessing passwords.
Important dates.
960
00:52:48,956 --> 00:52:51,334
1-4-9-2. Nope.
961
00:52:51,334 --> 00:52:53,378
1-7-7-6. Nope.
962
00:52:53,378 --> 00:52:56,381
What, are you gonna guess
every impressive date in history? Stop.
963
00:52:56,381 --> 00:52:57,924
Right. He was a bicycle fan.
964
00:52:57,924 --> 00:53:01,260
What was the year that Lance Armstrong
won his first Tour de France?
965
00:53:01,260 --> 00:53:03,596
-1-9--
-Stop, stop, stop.
966
00:53:03,596 --> 00:53:06,808
You're gonna lock us out of the phone
and we'll literally have nothing else.
967
00:53:06,808 --> 00:53:08,351
Okay.
968
00:53:10,311 --> 00:53:12,438
I know who can get us into the phone.
969
00:53:12,438 --> 00:53:13,523
Who?
970
00:53:13,523 --> 00:53:14,941
Keith.
971
00:53:14,941 --> 00:53:18,069
-Keith?
-He's our IT guy, okay?
972
00:53:18,069 --> 00:53:20,530
-Oh, really?
-And he's a genius at this type of stuff.
973
00:53:20,530 --> 00:53:23,074
Oh, he's a genius? Wow!
974
00:53:23,074 --> 00:53:27,036
You guys are so lucky to have a genius
working at your office as the IT guy.
975
00:53:27,036 --> 00:53:30,373
I'm not trying to hype him up.
But if anybody can do it, he can do it.
976
00:53:30,373 --> 00:53:32,875
Errol Morris is a genius.
J.K. Rowling is a genius.
977
00:53:32,875 --> 00:53:34,794
You could even say Lil Wayne is a genius.
978
00:53:34,794 --> 00:53:36,337
But Keith? Fucking Keith?
979
00:53:36,337 --> 00:53:38,172
What is your deal with him?
Why are you so--
980
00:53:38,172 --> 00:53:39,841
I don't like the way he looks at you.
981
00:53:39,841 --> 00:53:41,968
He doesn't look at me like anything.
982
00:53:43,052 --> 00:53:44,053
Well, then...
983
00:53:45,847 --> 00:53:48,099
I don't like the way you look at him.
984
00:53:54,480 --> 00:53:57,567
Look, do you wanna
get into this phone or not?
985
00:53:57,567 --> 00:53:59,819
'Cause this could be our only chance.
986
00:54:07,452 --> 00:54:09,328
All right.
We're gonna go in for five minutes,
987
00:54:09,328 --> 00:54:11,080
get the phone unlocked,
and we are leaving.
988
00:54:11,080 --> 00:54:13,332
No, wait. We can't just go in there
989
00:54:13,332 --> 00:54:15,251
and ask Keith to hack into a random phone.
990
00:54:15,251 --> 00:54:17,462
'Cause he's really ethical
about this kind of stuff.
991
00:54:17,462 --> 00:54:20,423
He's really ethical,
but he's okay stealing comedy?
992
00:54:20,423 --> 00:54:22,091
This guy's a real question mark.
993
00:54:22,091 --> 00:54:24,010
Help me come up with something believable.
994
00:54:26,888 --> 00:54:28,973
Everyone!
995
00:54:28,973 --> 00:54:30,600
Look who finally showed up.
996
00:54:30,600 --> 00:54:33,895
About fucking time! Hey.
997
00:54:33,895 --> 00:54:35,605
Sorry we're so late.
998
00:54:35,605 --> 00:54:38,232
-Hey, Keith is here.
-Hi.
999
00:54:39,150 --> 00:54:41,360
Oh, my God, this all looks so good.
1000
00:54:41,360 --> 00:54:43,196
Reya, you have outdone yourself!
1001
00:54:43,196 --> 00:54:45,698
Oh, my God! What is this?
1002
00:54:45,698 --> 00:54:48,743
-Red pepper.
-"Red pepper"? That's how you say it?
1003
00:54:48,743 --> 00:54:50,953
-"Pepper."
-Where do you get this?
1004
00:54:50,953 --> 00:54:52,955
The supermarket.
1005
00:54:52,955 --> 00:54:54,499
-Nuh-uh!
-What?
1006
00:54:54,499 --> 00:54:56,292
Did you try this, guys?
1007
00:54:56,292 --> 00:54:57,752
-It's good.
-Oh, my God.
1008
00:54:57,752 --> 00:55:00,046
That is to die for!
1009
00:55:00,046 --> 00:55:02,507
These are some of the best...
things we've had.
1010
00:55:02,507 --> 00:55:04,926
-It's so fresh!
-So these are red, there's green ones.
1011
00:55:04,926 --> 00:55:07,512
-What other pepper colors do you got?
-There's also yellow.
1012
00:55:07,512 --> 00:55:09,680
I wasn't asking you, Keith.
I was asking Reya.
1013
00:55:09,680 --> 00:55:11,057
Are you guys okay?
1014
00:55:11,057 --> 00:55:12,600
-Us?
-So good.
1015
00:55:12,600 --> 00:55:14,101
-Fucking great.
-A-OK. One hundred.
1016
00:55:14,101 --> 00:55:17,313
-But you're almost five hours late.
-And what the fuck are you wearing?
1017
00:55:17,313 --> 00:55:20,316
What the fuck am I wearing?
What the fuck are you wearing, dude?
1018
00:55:20,316 --> 00:55:21,859
Turtleneck.
1019
00:55:21,859 --> 00:55:23,986
Is that blood on your face?
1020
00:55:23,986 --> 00:55:26,197
And it's a big disgrace.
1021
00:55:26,197 --> 00:55:29,784
Is there anything you wanna tell us?
Like, anything at all?
1022
00:55:29,784 --> 00:55:32,286
We actually do have some news.
1023
00:55:33,496 --> 00:55:34,789
-Jibran, tell them.
-We box now.
1024
00:55:34,789 --> 00:55:36,290
You're engaged.
1025
00:55:41,170 --> 00:55:42,630
I'm-- I'm so sorry.
1026
00:55:42,630 --> 00:55:46,843
-We just all assumed that you guys--
-No.
1027
00:55:46,843 --> 00:55:48,678
No, no, no, that was perfectly logical.
1028
00:55:48,678 --> 00:55:51,138
It makes so much sense
and it's a way better reason.
1029
00:55:52,348 --> 00:55:54,851
So, you said you box now?
1030
00:55:54,851 --> 00:55:58,521
Yeah. It's sort of our passion
at this point in time.
1031
00:56:00,857 --> 00:56:03,818
We actually just took a class
before we came here.
1032
00:56:03,818 --> 00:56:07,738
And Jibran boxed
outside of his weight class.
1033
00:56:07,738 --> 00:56:09,574
It was incredible.
1034
00:56:09,574 --> 00:56:12,410
I'm what they call a "bleeder"
in the boxing biz.
1035
00:56:12,410 --> 00:56:15,288
They actually said I could
never be a professional boxer
1036
00:56:15,288 --> 00:56:17,039
because of how much I bleed.
1037
00:56:17,039 --> 00:56:20,543
So the reason you were late
was because you were boxing?
1038
00:56:20,543 --> 00:56:22,086
Yeah!
1039
00:56:24,213 --> 00:56:26,549
Oh, my God, I have such a good idea!
1040
00:56:26,549 --> 00:56:29,886
Do you guys wanna see
a video of Jibran getting knocked out?
1041
00:56:29,886 --> 00:56:31,637
Yeah, definitely.
1042
00:56:31,637 --> 00:56:33,472
Pull out your phone, honey.
1043
00:56:36,183 --> 00:56:37,894
Okay.
1044
00:56:39,145 --> 00:56:40,396
What?
1045
00:56:40,396 --> 00:56:43,733
I can't remember my passcode to my phone.
1046
00:56:44,734 --> 00:56:47,320
Oh, my God!
Do you think that it's all the hits
1047
00:56:47,320 --> 00:56:49,238
you took to your head while boxing?
1048
00:56:52,283 --> 00:56:54,660
-Is it a new passcode?
-No, Keith, it's not a new passcode!
1049
00:56:54,660 --> 00:56:56,621
Good question, though.
1050
00:56:56,621 --> 00:56:59,790
Oh, my God! Do I have a brain... brain...
1051
00:57:00,666 --> 00:57:01,918
brain injury?
1052
00:57:01,918 --> 00:57:03,419
Call your doctor.
1053
00:57:03,419 --> 00:57:06,047
Yeah, I'll call Doctor...
1054
00:57:06,047 --> 00:57:07,590
You don't remember his name!
1055
00:57:07,590 --> 00:57:10,134
His name is in the phone,
but I can't get in,
1056
00:57:10,134 --> 00:57:11,844
-so I can't even Google it!
-How do--
1057
00:57:11,844 --> 00:57:13,763
-If only we could unlock the phone.
-Oh, no.
1058
00:57:13,763 --> 00:57:15,389
-Oh, no.
-It's okay.
1059
00:57:16,515 --> 00:57:17,850
I can get into your phone.
1060
00:57:17,850 --> 00:57:19,477
Oh, you don't have to do that.
1061
00:57:19,477 --> 00:57:21,062
-I wanna help.
-Let's do it right now!
1062
00:57:27,151 --> 00:57:29,195
This thing's a wreck.
You need a new phone, man.
1063
00:57:29,195 --> 00:57:30,738
You need a new phone.
1064
00:57:30,738 --> 00:57:32,490
-What?
-What?
1065
00:57:32,490 --> 00:57:35,284
You have had such a night.
Do you want a shot?
1066
00:57:35,284 --> 00:57:37,703
Oh, no, we're in a rush,
so I probably shouldn't.
1067
00:57:37,703 --> 00:57:38,871
Okay.
1068
00:57:38,871 --> 00:57:42,708
Why don't you give it to me?
I'll handle it. Thank you.
1069
00:57:45,127 --> 00:57:46,921
Hey, Lei-bae,
1070
00:57:46,921 --> 00:57:50,132
where are we on the whole
pinot grigio situation?
1071
00:57:50,132 --> 00:57:51,842
You know what, with all the trauma
1072
00:57:51,842 --> 00:57:54,887
of the bleeding and the boxing
and the brain injury,
1073
00:57:54,887 --> 00:57:56,806
I just-- It slipped my mind.
1074
00:57:56,806 --> 00:58:01,644
Yeah, that's a bummer. But I guess
I will just drink the Don Julio.
1075
00:58:01,644 --> 00:58:03,229
Thanks, Rey-bae.
1076
00:58:04,522 --> 00:58:06,023
She's great.
1077
00:58:06,816 --> 00:58:09,694
I'm just running the rainbow tables here,
about halfway through.
1078
00:58:09,694 --> 00:58:13,030
I was actually gonna run a brute-force
algorithm, but this'll be a lot faster.
1079
00:58:13,030 --> 00:58:14,991
It'll be faster, yeah. Good call.
1080
00:58:14,991 --> 00:58:16,492
Oh, you know about it?
1081
00:58:16,492 --> 00:58:18,160
-Yeah, know all about it.
-Awesome.
1082
00:58:18,160 --> 00:58:20,955
'Cause a brute-force algorithm
would brutally force
1083
00:58:20,955 --> 00:58:24,333
the rhythm of Al Gore,
1084
00:58:24,333 --> 00:58:27,712
while rainbow tables
are sort of more the spectrum of...
1085
00:58:28,713 --> 00:58:31,257
Roy G. Biv and all that, so...
1086
00:58:31,257 --> 00:58:32,508
Roy G. Biv?
1087
00:58:32,508 --> 00:58:36,429
Roy Greg Biv. Discovered rainbows.
1088
00:58:36,429 --> 00:58:39,056
Listen, Leilani,
about that whole engagement thing--
1089
00:58:39,056 --> 00:58:41,308
-I'm so sorry.
-Reya...
1090
00:58:41,308 --> 00:58:44,562
-Jibran and I broke up.
-Oh, my God, are you serious?
1091
00:58:44,562 --> 00:58:47,898
How is that even possible?
You're, like, the best couple ever.
1092
00:58:47,898 --> 00:58:51,235
Us? You and Bobby are the perfect couple.
Are you kidding?
1093
00:58:51,235 --> 00:58:53,446
Oh, no, Bobby and I fight all the time.
1094
00:58:53,446 --> 00:58:56,365
Yeah, but you guys have sex constantly.
1095
00:58:56,365 --> 00:58:58,284
Like doing all kinds of freaky shit.
1096
00:58:58,284 --> 00:59:00,745
Oh, no. Why would you think that?
1097
00:59:00,745 --> 00:59:03,622
'Cause you post those hot pictures
of you and Bobby in bed.
1098
00:59:04,498 --> 00:59:07,585
Two of my exes follow me.
I'm just trying to make them jealous.
1099
00:59:08,627 --> 00:59:10,713
Yeah, it's not...
1100
00:59:10,713 --> 00:59:13,591
So where'd you learn this stuff?
Like, MIT or something?
1101
00:59:13,591 --> 00:59:15,968
Me? Yeah, right.
1102
00:59:15,968 --> 00:59:18,387
Nothing like that.
You're the fancy one here.
1103
00:59:19,221 --> 00:59:20,765
What?
1104
00:59:20,765 --> 00:59:23,100
Yeah, Leilani's told me all about you.
1105
00:59:23,100 --> 00:59:24,852
Sound like a very impressive guy.
1106
00:59:26,604 --> 00:59:29,315
-She talks about me?
-Yeah.
1107
00:59:29,315 --> 00:59:31,525
She brags about you all the time.
1108
00:59:41,744 --> 00:59:44,413
Look at that. We're in.
1109
00:59:56,926 --> 00:59:59,136
-Can you do me a favor?
-Yeah, anything.
1110
00:59:59,136 --> 01:00:01,889
Ever since Ji and I broke up,
I've been super emotional,
1111
01:00:01,889 --> 01:00:03,891
and I have all these dick pics,
1112
01:00:03,891 --> 01:00:07,061
and I just need someone
1113
01:00:07,061 --> 01:00:09,480
to hold on to them for me
till I'm emotionally ready.
1114
01:00:09,480 --> 01:00:11,941
-You printed them out?
-I did.
1115
01:00:11,941 --> 01:00:13,567
Just put them--
Don't open 'em.
1116
01:00:13,567 --> 01:00:16,028
Just put them in a safe place, okay?
1117
01:00:16,028 --> 01:00:18,155
"Senator Burrows"?
1118
01:00:18,155 --> 01:00:19,990
Mm-hmm, that's what I call it.
1119
01:00:19,990 --> 01:00:22,535
'Cause he be burrowing all up in there!
1120
01:00:22,535 --> 01:00:24,495
Okay.
1121
01:00:24,495 --> 01:00:26,539
And you said I get freaky and shit.
1122
01:00:26,539 --> 01:00:28,457
Hey!
1123
01:00:28,457 --> 01:00:30,960
-So Keith unlocked my phone.
-Great!
1124
01:00:30,960 --> 01:00:32,753
Yeah, my doctor's at a party.
1125
01:00:32,753 --> 01:00:34,880
He'll see me, but we have to go right now.
1126
01:00:34,880 --> 01:00:36,298
Okay, let's go.
1127
01:00:36,298 --> 01:00:38,425
We can't go dressed like this.
1128
01:00:38,425 --> 01:00:40,052
Why not?
1129
01:00:40,052 --> 01:00:42,555
Oh, he's at a fancy benefit, 30...
1130
01:00:42,555 --> 01:00:44,890
Can we borrow some nice clothes
from you, Rey?
1131
01:00:44,890 --> 01:00:46,475
Yeah. Right this way.
1132
01:00:52,648 --> 01:00:54,984
-Yeah.
-What are you doing?
1133
01:00:54,984 --> 01:00:56,569
Turning around so you can change.
1134
01:00:56,569 --> 01:00:59,738
It's not like you haven't seen this
a million times.
1135
01:00:59,738 --> 01:01:00,948
Okay.
1136
01:01:03,659 --> 01:01:05,369
-Actually, turn around, yeah.
-A little weird.
1137
01:01:07,872 --> 01:01:09,415
Are you ready for this?
1138
01:01:09,415 --> 01:01:11,792
No. But I'm glad we're together.
1139
01:01:11,792 --> 01:01:13,169
Me, too.
1140
01:01:13,169 --> 01:01:16,881
Listen. If I don't make it,
you could do a lot worse than Keith.
1141
01:01:16,881 --> 01:01:19,341
I would never date
anyone who steals comedy.
1142
01:01:29,310 --> 01:01:30,769
|'ma finish getting dressed outside
1143
01:01:30,769 --> 01:01:32,646
-so you can get dressed in here.
-Yeah.
1144
01:01:33,522 --> 01:01:35,733
-Shoes.
-Guess I don't need these.
1145
01:01:35,733 --> 01:01:38,777
-Yeah. Trade you.
-Thanks.
1146
01:01:38,777 --> 01:01:40,696
See you later, crocodile.
1147
01:01:40,696 --> 01:01:42,072
Okay.
1148
01:01:56,420 --> 01:01:57,504
You look great.
1149
01:01:58,172 --> 01:01:59,256
Thank you.
1150
01:02:01,550 --> 01:02:03,802
-Ready?
-Yeah, ready.
1151
01:02:03,802 --> 01:02:06,055
-For our doctor's!
-Yeah, my doctor's, with the...
1152
01:02:06,055 --> 01:02:07,765
-Yeah.
-Have a great night!
1153
01:02:07,765 --> 01:02:09,350
...four concussions.
1154
01:02:12,102 --> 01:02:13,687
Oh, no. It's the cops again.
1155
01:02:22,071 --> 01:02:23,656
Ma'am, it's a little quiet in here.
1156
01:02:23,656 --> 01:02:25,741
Do you mind turning on
some music or something?
1157
01:02:25,741 --> 01:02:27,201
-Yeah. Of course.
-Thank you.
1158
01:02:33,874 --> 01:02:35,793
-What?
-This used to be our jam.
1159
01:02:35,793 --> 01:02:37,795
This has never once been our jam.
1160
01:02:37,795 --> 01:02:40,381
Do not act like you don't like this song
like the rest of the world.
1161
01:02:40,381 --> 01:02:43,050
I do not like this song
like the rest of the world.
1162
01:02:48,889 --> 01:02:51,684
I know what you're doing. Whenever
I'm stressed out, you try and get me
1163
01:02:51,684 --> 01:02:53,352
to sing along to songs,
and it never works.
1164
01:02:53,352 --> 01:02:55,646
It always works.
You just gotta be open to it.
1165
01:02:58,190 --> 01:03:00,442
Don't do this. Please don't do this.
1166
01:03:00,442 --> 01:03:02,278
I'm just not in the mood.
1167
01:03:02,820 --> 01:03:05,614
Can you just sing in your head?
1168
01:03:56,582 --> 01:03:57,958
Phone?
1169
01:03:59,752 --> 01:04:01,003
Okay.
1170
01:04:03,213 --> 01:04:04,465
Go ahead.
1171
01:04:05,215 --> 01:04:07,426
-Yeah.
-Thank you.
1172
01:04:19,271 --> 01:04:20,981
Thank you so much.
1173
01:04:37,581 --> 01:04:39,833
What is this place?
1174
01:04:39,833 --> 01:04:41,960
I don't know, but it's fucking creepy.
1175
01:04:48,801 --> 01:04:51,136
-That's Edie.
-What if she recognizes us?
1176
01:05:11,740 --> 01:05:13,951
Oh, shit.
1177
01:05:17,371 --> 01:05:19,873
Why is it so quiet?
1178
01:05:22,876 --> 01:05:24,878
Hi, can we...
1179
01:05:26,171 --> 01:05:27,423
Sorry.
1180
01:05:28,882 --> 01:05:32,177
-Sorry. Thank you.
-Excuse me.
1181
01:05:32,177 --> 01:05:34,638
-Hi.
-Oh, it's so sharp.
1182
01:05:35,514 --> 01:05:38,976
Excuse me. Sorry.
1183
01:05:38,976 --> 01:05:40,519
Sorry.
1184
01:05:54,700 --> 01:05:58,328
We are one. We are Sacrarium.
1185
01:05:58,328 --> 01:06:02,541
We are many. We are Sacrarium.
1186
01:06:02,541 --> 01:06:04,710
-We are many.
-We are one.
1187
01:06:04,710 --> 01:06:06,253
We are Sacrarium.
1188
01:06:06,253 --> 01:06:08,088
We are one--
1189
01:06:20,434 --> 01:06:25,147
Welcome, Membra Autem Sacrarium.
1190
01:06:25,147 --> 01:06:29,193
From the time of Hermes Trismegistus,
1191
01:06:29,193 --> 01:06:30,986
Hermes the Thrice-Blessed...
1192
01:06:30,986 --> 01:06:33,614
This is some Illuminati bullshit.
1193
01:06:33,614 --> 01:06:35,491
...to build the pyramids
1194
01:06:35,491 --> 01:06:38,202
to the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn.
1195
01:06:38,202 --> 01:06:39,703
Light the fire of knowledge.
1196
01:06:39,703 --> 01:06:41,580
-L'Eggo my Eggo.
-Where's the beef?
1197
01:06:41,580 --> 01:06:45,292
This unbroken chain of wisdom
1198
01:06:45,292 --> 01:06:49,046
shall be handed down to ten initiates.
1199
01:06:49,046 --> 01:06:52,674
The few become many become one.
1200
01:07:08,357 --> 01:07:09,775
Fifty-one.
1201
01:07:12,569 --> 01:07:13,946
Is this Bingo?
1202
01:07:14,571 --> 01:07:15,572
I like Bingo.
1203
01:07:16,823 --> 01:07:18,742
Seventeen.
1204
01:07:21,995 --> 01:07:23,872
Six.
1205
01:07:23,872 --> 01:07:25,207
Twenty-three.
1206
01:07:25,874 --> 01:07:27,167
Did they win?
1207
01:07:27,834 --> 01:07:29,211
Fourteen.
1208
01:07:30,629 --> 01:07:33,006
I don't think we're supposed to do that.
1209
01:07:33,006 --> 01:07:34,508
Seventy-two.
1210
01:07:36,552 --> 01:07:38,470
Forty-four.
1211
01:07:38,470 --> 01:07:40,389
Where are they going?
1212
01:07:40,389 --> 01:07:42,224
Thirty-four.
1213
01:07:42,224 --> 01:07:44,351
Do we want our names to be called?
1214
01:07:44,351 --> 01:07:45,936
I don't know. I don't think so.
1215
01:07:45,936 --> 01:07:49,106
And the final number is...
1216
01:07:51,358 --> 01:07:53,443
Ninety-nine.
1217
01:07:54,861 --> 01:07:56,738
Let the ceremony begin.
1218
01:08:00,826 --> 01:08:03,036
-Oh, no, that's not the vibe.
-Mm-hmm.
1219
01:08:05,872 --> 01:08:08,750
What is happening?
1220
01:08:21,096 --> 01:08:22,973
I think they're gonna...
1221
01:08:23,974 --> 01:08:27,019
Yeah, that's what
I thought was gonna happen.
1222
01:08:33,775 --> 01:08:35,235
No, they didn't.
1223
01:08:35,235 --> 01:08:37,738
-Yes, they did.
-Yes, they did.
1224
01:08:41,617 --> 01:08:43,493
You know, I'm actually not hating this.
1225
01:08:43,493 --> 01:08:46,288
Yeah, you've made
your thoughts on orgies quite clear.
1226
01:08:46,288 --> 01:08:48,040
Do you think they're gonna
call more numbers?
1227
01:08:51,168 --> 01:08:53,420
-This is spontaneous.
-This is not spontaneous!
1228
01:08:53,420 --> 01:08:55,339
I bet all these people had it
on their Google Cal.
1229
01:09:04,348 --> 01:09:05,974
Stop!
1230
01:09:07,267 --> 01:09:08,644
Go away!
1231
01:09:15,025 --> 01:09:17,319
I love that they actually
respect the word "stop."
1232
01:09:23,825 --> 01:09:27,746
There is a traitor amongst us.
1233
01:09:28,872 --> 01:09:34,586
A worker has violated
the most sacred code of Sacrarium.
1234
01:09:34,586 --> 01:09:38,173
And for this, he has paid a hefty price.
1235
01:09:38,173 --> 01:09:41,385
He is quod mortem.
1236
01:09:41,385 --> 01:09:43,053
Jibran, my God.
1237
01:09:43,053 --> 01:09:44,846
They hired Mustache to kill Bicycle.
1238
01:09:44,846 --> 01:09:47,432
Oh, shit.
1239
01:09:47,432 --> 01:09:49,685
-Silence!
-We should get out of here.
1240
01:09:49,685 --> 01:09:52,521
I have just learned
that this man's barcode
1241
01:09:52,521 --> 01:09:56,483
has been used to enter Sacrarium tonight.
1242
01:09:56,483 --> 01:09:58,235
It's okay.
1243
01:09:58,235 --> 01:10:01,947
We have imposters in our ranks.
1244
01:10:03,198 --> 01:10:05,951
Oh, no, imposters. That sucks.
1245
01:10:05,951 --> 01:10:09,830
We must all reveal our true faces,
1246
01:10:09,830 --> 01:10:13,333
so that this imposter may be rooted out
1247
01:10:13,333 --> 01:10:15,877
and dealt with.
1248
01:10:15,877 --> 01:10:17,671
On my count of three,
1249
01:10:17,671 --> 01:10:20,507
unmask yourselves.
1250
01:10:20,507 --> 01:10:21,967
One...
1251
01:10:21,967 --> 01:10:23,760
-Okay, fuck.
-Are we gonna do it?
1252
01:10:23,760 --> 01:10:25,887
-Everyone's gonna take it off.
-Two...
1253
01:10:25,887 --> 01:10:27,806
Fuck, fuck, we have to do it.
1254
01:10:27,806 --> 01:10:30,016
-If everybody else is doing it.
-Three!
1255
01:10:33,979 --> 01:10:35,897
Oh, fuck.
1256
01:10:35,897 --> 01:10:39,735
A true member knows
you never take off your mask.
1257
01:10:40,944 --> 01:10:42,988
Oh, my God, that's them.
1258
01:10:42,988 --> 01:10:45,449
-Go! Go get 'em!
-Oh, God.
1259
01:10:45,449 --> 01:10:47,576
We are one. We are Sacrarium.
1260
01:10:47,576 --> 01:10:49,745
Your burnt offerings
1261
01:10:49,745 --> 01:10:51,955
shall be made to the gods,
1262
01:10:51,955 --> 01:10:54,624
-and it shall replenish them.
-No! Stop! I'm a bleeder!
1263
01:10:57,169 --> 01:10:58,545
Evacuate.
1264
01:10:59,713 --> 01:11:00,714
Evacuate.
1265
01:11:02,591 --> 01:11:03,884
Evacuate.
1266
01:11:05,093 --> 01:11:06,595
What the fuck?
1267
01:11:12,434 --> 01:11:15,228
What the fuck? All the fuck people left.
1268
01:11:15,228 --> 01:11:16,855
Are we having the same dream?
1269
01:11:19,649 --> 01:11:20,859
Let's go.
1270
01:11:20,859 --> 01:11:23,028
-Police!
-Go, go, go, go!
1271
01:11:23,028 --> 01:11:25,447
-Oh, my God.
-Go, go, go, go!
1272
01:11:25,447 --> 01:11:27,824
Freeze! Hands in the air!
1273
01:11:27,824 --> 01:11:31,787
-Higher! Higher!
-This is as high as they go.
1274
01:11:34,206 --> 01:11:36,249
Dispatch, that's a 10-95.
1275
01:11:36,249 --> 01:11:38,835
They're in custody. We're on our way back.
1276
01:11:54,559 --> 01:11:56,728
Detective Martin will be here shortly.
1277
01:12:02,818 --> 01:12:05,946
It's over. We're done.
1278
01:12:07,280 --> 01:12:08,573
I know.
1279
01:12:12,619 --> 01:12:15,288
I'm never gonna be able
to see Radiohead live.
1280
01:12:18,333 --> 01:12:20,126
I'm never gonna see the ocean again.
1281
01:12:21,002 --> 01:12:22,712
You hated going to the beach.
1282
01:12:22,712 --> 01:12:24,548
No, I loved the beach.
1283
01:12:24,548 --> 01:12:25,924
I just hated all the sand.
1284
01:12:25,924 --> 01:12:27,509
That's what a beach is.
1285
01:12:27,509 --> 01:12:29,594
No, it's a lot more ocean.
1286
01:12:35,016 --> 01:12:36,685
I'm never gonna have kids.
1287
01:12:38,103 --> 01:12:39,855
Since when do you want kids?
1288
01:12:40,856 --> 01:12:42,274
Since always.
1289
01:12:44,192 --> 01:12:46,111
Why didn't you ever tell me that?
1290
01:12:48,321 --> 01:12:50,323
Because you always said
you didn't want kids,
1291
01:12:50,323 --> 01:12:52,868
so I figured I'd just go without.
1292
01:12:53,952 --> 01:12:56,121
You'd sacrifice that for me?
1293
01:12:57,455 --> 01:12:59,040
You were worth it.
1294
01:13:09,968 --> 01:13:11,595
I need to tell you something.
1295
01:13:12,596 --> 01:13:13,972
Yeah?
1296
01:13:15,765 --> 01:13:20,437
You remember when you went out of town
for Ben's bachelor party?
1297
01:13:20,437 --> 01:13:22,439
You ate all my peanut brittle.
1298
01:13:22,439 --> 01:13:23,857
No.
1299
01:13:23,857 --> 01:13:25,066
Yeah.
1300
01:13:27,068 --> 01:13:30,155
I snuck into your office
and I watched your documentary.
1301
01:13:31,031 --> 01:13:33,283
-You did what?
-I know, I'm sorry.
1302
01:13:34,159 --> 01:13:36,870
But can I just say that
1303
01:13:36,870 --> 01:13:39,164
it was really good.
1304
01:13:41,791 --> 01:13:43,168
Why didn't you say something?
1305
01:13:44,586 --> 01:13:47,380
Jibran, honestly, sometimes...
1306
01:13:47,881 --> 01:13:50,300
I feel like you don't care what I think.
1307
01:13:53,011 --> 01:13:56,806
I care so much about what you think.
That's why I didn't wanna show it to you.
1308
01:13:56,806 --> 01:13:58,934
I was afraid you wouldn't like it.
1309
01:13:58,934 --> 01:14:03,396
You know, you've had your life figured out
since the moment we met.
1310
01:14:03,396 --> 01:14:06,274
I always felt like you could
do so much better than me.
1311
01:14:10,737 --> 01:14:12,238
You know, honestly, I...
1312
01:14:12,238 --> 01:14:15,367
I feel like I don't have
anything figured out.
1313
01:14:15,367 --> 01:14:17,494
Like, zero.
1314
01:14:19,079 --> 01:14:21,748
But I was so obsessed
with what everybody else thought,
1315
01:14:21,748 --> 01:14:24,584
except the one person
that I care about the most.
1316
01:14:28,213 --> 01:14:30,340
I just want you to be happy.
1317
01:14:32,300 --> 01:14:34,302
I want you to be happy, too.
1318
01:14:39,140 --> 01:14:42,477
We'll still be friends,
laying out at the trial.
1319
01:14:43,269 --> 01:14:44,688
Oh, no, I took a deal.
1320
01:14:44,688 --> 01:14:46,481
-What?
-Nobody told you?
1321
01:14:47,774 --> 01:14:49,526
But I thought we'd have the same lawyer.
1322
01:14:49,526 --> 01:14:51,987
-I'm a rat all day.
-It's done?
1323
01:14:51,987 --> 01:14:53,947
-Yeah, it's done.
-Shit.
1324
01:14:53,947 --> 01:14:57,534
I like them.
I don't think they should break up.
1325
01:14:57,534 --> 01:14:59,869
Relationships are a motherfucker.
1326
01:14:59,869 --> 01:15:00,870
Yeah.
1327
01:15:23,018 --> 01:15:25,729
We've been looking for you
all over this city.
1328
01:15:28,606 --> 01:15:32,027
You guys are key witnesses on a homicide,
and the suspect is still on the loose.
1329
01:15:33,987 --> 01:15:35,196
What?
1330
01:15:35,196 --> 01:15:38,158
We've been trying to track you down
all night to make sure you were safe.
1331
01:15:38,158 --> 01:15:40,660
We tried calling your phone several times.
1332
01:15:40,660 --> 01:15:43,246
Wait, I'm sorry.
You don't think we're the murderers?
1333
01:15:43,246 --> 01:15:46,833
No. There were traffic cameras
that caught the entire pursuit.
1334
01:15:46,833 --> 01:15:48,543
I can't believe this.
1335
01:15:48,543 --> 01:15:51,254
We're trying to ID the individual
who carjacked your vehicle.
1336
01:15:51,254 --> 01:15:54,883
We know he's responsible for this
incident as well as multiple homicides
1337
01:15:54,883 --> 01:15:56,760
-at the St. Charles Apartments.
-He's a bad man.
1338
01:15:56,760 --> 01:15:59,095
-A bunch of dead frat guys.
-Okay--
1339
01:16:00,221 --> 01:16:01,723
Just to be clear...
1340
01:16:02,807 --> 01:16:07,270
we are not suspects in a murder/homicide.
1341
01:16:07,270 --> 01:16:08,980
-You know we didn't do this.
-We didn't.
1342
01:16:08,980 --> 01:16:10,732
-And you know it.
-Of course you didn't do it.
1343
01:16:10,732 --> 01:16:12,317
Why would two civilians
1344
01:16:12,317 --> 01:16:14,360
violently murder a man they've never met?
1345
01:16:14,360 --> 01:16:17,155
Like, why would we...
1346
01:16:17,155 --> 01:16:19,449
-It doesn't make sense.
-It doesn't make any sense.
1347
01:16:19,449 --> 01:16:21,451
Oh, my God!
1348
01:16:21,451 --> 01:16:24,954
That's right.
I promise I've never killed anyone.
1349
01:16:24,954 --> 01:16:27,165
And I promise to never kill anyone,
Scout's honor.
1350
01:16:27,165 --> 01:16:29,250
-Never. Never kill anybody.
-Never kill.
1351
01:16:29,250 --> 01:16:32,128
Have I thought about killing people?
Like Jibran?
1352
01:16:32,128 --> 01:16:33,838
All the time. But I would never--
1353
01:16:33,838 --> 01:16:35,507
-But that's in a normal way!
-No--
1354
01:16:35,507 --> 01:16:36,925
She would never act on it.
1355
01:16:36,925 --> 01:16:40,178
In the way where I'm like,
"I will kill you, I will wring your neck!"
1356
01:16:40,178 --> 01:16:42,430
-But not in the real murder way.
-Not physically.
1357
01:16:42,430 --> 01:16:44,933
I have rolled through stop signs
almost every day of my life,
1358
01:16:44,933 --> 01:16:47,894
but not in a dangerous way.
1359
01:16:47,894 --> 01:16:51,147
I used to sell my uncle's edibles.
1360
01:16:51,147 --> 01:16:53,149
He was always like,
"It's legal in Amsterdam."
1361
01:16:53,149 --> 01:16:56,361
-He could not point to Amsterdam on a map.
-She did not sell them in Amsterdam.
1362
01:16:56,361 --> 01:16:58,613
-She sold them here.
-I don't know where Amsterdam is.
1363
01:16:58,613 --> 01:17:00,782
But to help people get high.
1364
01:17:00,782 --> 01:17:02,992
Just glaucoma and things like that.
1365
01:17:02,992 --> 01:17:05,120
Yes, mostly. She did make some money
1366
01:17:05,120 --> 01:17:06,955
at a time when we did need some money.
1367
01:17:06,955 --> 01:17:09,499
We needed to pay bills.
Wait, I'm sorry.
1368
01:17:09,499 --> 01:17:12,502
So, did you guys catch the...
the cult people?
1369
01:17:12,502 --> 01:17:14,629
The cult in the theater with the people
1370
01:17:14,629 --> 01:17:16,798
with the masks and everybody was... sex.
1371
01:17:16,798 --> 01:17:18,341
The lucky people had sex.
1372
01:17:18,341 --> 01:17:20,510
-On the round bed--
-There was music.
1373
01:17:20,510 --> 01:17:22,804
-Yeah, they were having sex.
-In a very public place.
1374
01:17:22,804 --> 01:17:25,014
-Some people were putting in work.
-There was a big round bed.
1375
01:17:25,014 --> 01:17:28,893
Some people got right to it.
I will agree they were putting in work.
1376
01:17:28,893 --> 01:17:30,478
Yeah, we saw all of that.
1377
01:17:30,478 --> 01:17:33,690
Let me tell you, sis, it was a sight.
1378
01:17:33,690 --> 01:17:37,527
That's super helpful,
but we know all about Sacrarium.
1379
01:17:37,527 --> 01:17:39,028
We've been tracking them for months,
1380
01:17:39,028 --> 01:17:41,406
and the raid tonight was supposed
to shut them down for good,
1381
01:17:41,406 --> 01:17:44,534
but somebody tipped them off
that we were coming.
1382
01:17:44,534 --> 01:17:48,705
Look, you guys witnessed
some horrific things.
1383
01:17:48,705 --> 01:17:50,999
Eventually,
we're gonna need your statements,
1384
01:17:50,999 --> 01:17:53,168
but I really think that you two
1385
01:17:53,168 --> 01:17:55,420
would benefit from some sleep.
1386
01:17:55,420 --> 01:17:57,672
So why don't you come back
first thing in the morning
1387
01:17:57,672 --> 01:17:59,674
and we'll get your statements then.
1388
01:17:59,674 --> 01:18:02,010
One of our guys out back
will take you home.
1389
01:18:02,010 --> 01:18:03,845
And we'll keep an eye on your place
1390
01:18:03,845 --> 01:18:06,306
to make sure you're safe
until the suspect is apprehended.
1391
01:18:06,306 --> 01:18:08,808
Thank you so much.
This has been a good experience.
1392
01:18:08,808 --> 01:18:10,393
-I hope so.
-Thank you for everything.
1393
01:18:10,393 --> 01:18:12,353
Is there a comment card?
'Cause I'm doing five.
1394
01:18:12,353 --> 01:18:14,397
-I would love to-- Okay?
-Fives down the line.
1395
01:18:25,074 --> 01:18:27,243
So, that's it?
1396
01:18:27,243 --> 01:18:31,206
We just go back to our normal lives?
1397
01:18:31,206 --> 01:18:32,707
Like nothing happened?
1398
01:18:33,625 --> 01:18:35,919
I guess so.
1399
01:18:44,594 --> 01:18:46,471
I could sleep on the couch tonight.
1400
01:18:46,471 --> 01:18:49,515
Oh, no, no, no. We can... We can trade off.
1401
01:18:49,515 --> 01:18:51,684
No, you should have the bed.
1402
01:18:59,484 --> 01:19:03,404
This is crazy. I know we didn't, like,
solve the crime or whatever,
1403
01:19:03,404 --> 01:19:05,782
but we got really close.
1404
01:19:05,782 --> 01:19:06,991
I'm proud of us.
1405
01:19:07,992 --> 01:19:10,036
And not bad for a couple rookies.
1406
01:19:11,871 --> 01:19:16,292
You know, the one thing I can't figure out
is who called the cops?
1407
01:19:16,292 --> 01:19:17,752
I did.
1408
01:19:20,338 --> 01:19:21,756
Remember me?
1409
01:19:22,590 --> 01:19:24,300
How did you get in this car?
1410
01:19:24,300 --> 01:19:28,304
I told you I was a cop.
I've been on the force for about 13 years.
1411
01:19:28,304 --> 01:19:30,556
I'm actually kind of a big deal
over there.
1412
01:19:31,224 --> 01:19:34,060
And you're a member of the sex cult, too?
1413
01:19:34,060 --> 01:19:36,271
Nah, they pay me
to keep 'em safe from the police.
1414
01:19:36,271 --> 01:19:39,065
Wait, so you were protecting the sex cult
1415
01:19:39,065 --> 01:19:42,151
and also blackmailing its members?
1416
01:19:42,151 --> 01:19:43,861
As a matter of fact, I was.
1417
01:19:43,861 --> 01:19:46,239
Do you know how much
this fucking city pays me?
1418
01:19:46,239 --> 01:19:48,866
I put my life on the line every single day
1419
01:19:48,866 --> 01:19:50,952
and the government tosses pennies at me.
1420
01:19:50,952 --> 01:19:52,829
But you know what is fucked up?
1421
01:19:54,372 --> 01:19:56,249
That guy on the bicycle?
1422
01:19:56,249 --> 01:19:58,668
The one I ran over
several times with your car?
1423
01:19:58,668 --> 01:20:00,295
-I remember. You remember?
-Mm-hmm.
1424
01:20:00,295 --> 01:20:02,338
-Yeah, we remember.
-That was my friend.
1425
01:20:03,506 --> 01:20:07,593
Me and him, we come up with
the blackmail-the-cult scheme.
1426
01:20:07,593 --> 01:20:11,431
But he got too greedy.
Stopped giving me my full cut.
1427
01:20:11,431 --> 01:20:13,182
And then, against my better judgment,
1428
01:20:13,182 --> 01:20:15,476
he brought those ignorant frat boys
on board.
1429
01:20:15,476 --> 01:20:18,313
Sir, if I may, we don't know anything,
1430
01:20:18,313 --> 01:20:20,064
and we have terrible memories.
1431
01:20:20,064 --> 01:20:22,358
So please just let us go,
you can trust us.
1432
01:20:22,358 --> 01:20:24,610
Lady, I don't trust anyone.
Here's a little tip:
1433
01:20:24,610 --> 01:20:27,697
The world is out to get you.
1434
01:20:27,697 --> 01:20:30,533
The only one who's got your back
1435
01:20:30,533 --> 01:20:32,201
is you.
1436
01:20:32,201 --> 01:20:35,163
-You're wrong.
-That's not true.
1437
01:20:35,163 --> 01:20:38,624
I trusted someone. One person.
1438
01:20:39,459 --> 01:20:40,835
Siobhan.
1439
01:20:40,835 --> 01:20:43,755
I will never trust anyone again.
1440
01:20:43,755 --> 01:20:45,673
Never.
1441
01:20:45,673 --> 01:20:48,134
You come into this world alone
1442
01:20:48,134 --> 01:20:50,345
and you leave this world alone.
1443
01:20:50,345 --> 01:20:52,305
Which is what you two
are about to find out.
1444
01:21:04,317 --> 01:21:07,362
Look, I'm sorry I have to kill you guys.
1445
01:21:07,362 --> 01:21:10,740
You seem like a nice,
though somewhat annoying couple.
1446
01:21:10,740 --> 01:21:14,077
But if it makes you feel any better,
I will get over it.
1447
01:21:14,077 --> 01:21:17,288
You don't have to do this, okay?
You're not a killer, you're a good person.
1448
01:21:17,288 --> 01:21:19,040
I can see it in your eyes.
1449
01:21:19,040 --> 01:21:21,376
-Your eyes are so kind.
-They're luminous.
1450
01:21:21,376 --> 01:21:23,961
Do you know how many people
I have killed today?
1451
01:21:23,961 --> 01:21:28,091
I would say you've killed, like,
exactly the right number of people.
1452
01:21:28,091 --> 01:21:30,510
I wouldn't add to it, 'cause right now,
1453
01:21:30,510 --> 01:21:33,763
the number of people you've killed
is impressive, but not, like, worrying.
1454
01:21:33,763 --> 01:21:36,516
Also, you killed a guy on a bicycle
and a bunch of frat boys.
1455
01:21:36,516 --> 01:21:38,810
Who's kidding who?
You're practically a folk hero.
1456
01:21:38,810 --> 01:21:40,895
That was a rhetorical question.
1457
01:21:40,895 --> 01:21:42,939
Never too late to change.
1458
01:21:42,939 --> 01:21:44,857
Maybe if you do,
you can find a new Siobhan.
1459
01:21:44,857 --> 01:21:47,735
Did I say that you could
talk about Siobhan?
1460
01:21:47,735 --> 01:21:50,029
I thought you were sharing
and it was an open invitation.
1461
01:21:50,029 --> 01:21:51,697
Listen, Siobhan is clearly a tramp.
1462
01:21:51,697 --> 01:21:55,118
You, too! Take her name out of your mouth!
1463
01:21:55,118 --> 01:21:57,954
I will never say the name Siobhaaa again.
1464
01:21:57,954 --> 01:22:00,331
-She's dead to me. I don't even--
-She sucks.
1465
01:22:00,331 --> 01:22:01,958
Shut up.
1466
01:22:04,585 --> 01:22:06,337
He clearly isn't over Siobhan.
1467
01:22:08,923 --> 01:22:10,925
Turn around.
Put your hands behind your back.
1468
01:22:12,260 --> 01:22:15,012
You lay a hand on her
and I'll kick your ass, dude.
1469
01:22:16,305 --> 01:22:18,307
-Turn around.
-Yes, sir.
1470
01:22:20,560 --> 01:22:22,478
They have traffic cam footage of you, man.
1471
01:22:22,478 --> 01:22:24,355
You're so fucked.
1472
01:22:24,355 --> 01:22:26,607
Nah, I saw it. It's very grainy.
1473
01:22:26,607 --> 01:22:28,818
It's like Bigfoot footage.
1474
01:22:31,154 --> 01:22:33,364
We can't just sit here
waiting to be killed, okay?
1475
01:22:33,364 --> 01:22:34,824
-We need to do something.
-Okay.
1476
01:22:34,824 --> 01:22:36,868
-Help me figure something out.
-Okay, okay.
1477
01:22:37,785 --> 01:22:39,912
Here, loosen my ties.
1478
01:22:39,912 --> 01:22:41,789
-Can you do it?
-I can barely reach it.
1479
01:22:41,789 --> 01:22:43,916
-Can't move my fingers.
-It's getting tighter.
1480
01:22:43,916 --> 01:22:45,293
I'm sorry. Okay, try me.
1481
01:22:45,293 --> 01:22:47,003
-Is it working?
-No. Oh, fuck!
1482
01:22:47,003 --> 01:22:48,171
I'm gonna try kicking this.
1483
01:22:50,715 --> 01:22:53,593
-Oh, shit.
-I wish I was wearing your date shoes.
1484
01:22:53,593 --> 01:22:55,887
Jibran, the lighter!
The cigarette lighter!
1485
01:22:55,887 --> 01:22:57,972
That's what it's there for! Go, go.
1486
01:22:58,931 --> 01:22:59,974
Yeah, you can do it.
1487
01:23:04,437 --> 01:23:06,522
Okay, that's kind of hot.
1488
01:23:08,399 --> 01:23:10,443
-Does he see us?
-My God, he's laying down plastic.
1489
01:23:10,443 --> 01:23:12,069
Oh, Shit, Shit.
1490
01:23:12,069 --> 01:23:13,696
-Has it popped out yet?
-No.
1491
01:23:13,696 --> 01:23:15,948
-What about now?
-Okay. Okay.
1492
01:23:15,948 --> 01:23:18,242
Come on. Hurry up.
1493
01:23:18,242 --> 01:23:20,411
Get it, get it, get it.
Get it, get it, get it.
1494
01:23:20,411 --> 01:23:22,997
-Close your eyes.
-Come on, come on.
1495
01:23:22,997 --> 01:23:25,082
Get the plastic, not my hands!
1496
01:23:30,463 --> 01:23:31,631
Drop it, drop it.
1497
01:23:32,548 --> 01:23:34,425
-I had it in my mouth, okay?
-Yeah, but you didn't have
1498
01:23:34,425 --> 01:23:35,843
-the hot end in your mouth.
-Hurry up!
1499
01:23:37,178 --> 01:23:39,722
Hold, up, hold up.
He's looking at us. Hold on.
1500
01:23:41,140 --> 01:23:43,267
Okay, put it back.
Put it back. Put it back.
1501
01:23:45,603 --> 01:23:47,188
Out of the car.
1502
01:23:48,481 --> 01:23:51,692
They're gonna get you.
They know you drove us.
1503
01:23:51,692 --> 01:23:53,653
No, they're not gonna suspect me.
1504
01:23:53,653 --> 01:23:55,613
When I drove you guys to your apartment,
1505
01:23:55,613 --> 01:23:59,700
the real killer jumped out of the bushes
and hit me over the head!
1506
01:23:59,700 --> 01:24:01,911
When I woke up, there I was,
1507
01:24:01,911 --> 01:24:03,955
tied up in the back of my own squad car
1508
01:24:03,955 --> 01:24:06,040
with you guys here at the marina.
1509
01:24:07,708 --> 01:24:08,793
Watch your step.
1510
01:24:10,836 --> 01:24:14,257
And then the killer made us
get on the boat.
1511
01:24:14,257 --> 01:24:16,717
That's right. All three of us.
1512
01:24:16,717 --> 01:24:18,844
And you remember what happened next.
1513
01:24:18,844 --> 01:24:21,055
He made us all kneel down. Go ahead.
1514
01:24:22,723 --> 01:24:25,017
I jumped up and tried to save you guys.
1515
01:24:25,017 --> 01:24:27,395
And in the scuffle, I was shot.
1516
01:24:27,395 --> 01:24:30,064
I wasn't mortally wounded,
but I had to watch in horror
1517
01:24:30,064 --> 01:24:32,275
as the masked killer
1518
01:24:32,275 --> 01:24:34,652
executed you both with my gun.
1519
01:24:34,652 --> 01:24:36,195
Anyway, let's get this over with.
1520
01:24:37,405 --> 01:24:38,614
Eenie...
1521
01:24:38,614 --> 01:24:39,824
No.
1522
01:24:39,824 --> 01:24:41,242
Eenie,
1523
01:24:42,493 --> 01:24:43,869
meenie,
1524
01:24:43,869 --> 01:24:45,079
miney...
1525
01:24:55,172 --> 01:24:56,632
Hey, Mustache.
1526
01:25:06,142 --> 01:25:07,393
Okay, okay.
1527
01:25:10,354 --> 01:25:11,856
Oh, fuck.
1528
01:25:11,856 --> 01:25:14,400
-Oh, no, no, no.
-Oh, shit.
1529
01:25:14,400 --> 01:25:17,320
Go ahead. Shoot me.
1530
01:25:17,320 --> 01:25:19,238
Right here in the shoulder would be good.
1531
01:25:19,238 --> 01:25:21,407
That way I don't have to shoot myself.
1532
01:25:21,407 --> 01:25:23,451
Drop the gun or I'll break his neck.
1533
01:25:23,451 --> 01:25:26,704
You can't break his neck.
It-- It's too thick.
1534
01:25:26,704 --> 01:25:29,915
I'll just twist
until something bad happens.
1535
01:25:29,915 --> 01:25:32,168
From where I'm sitting,
he's super convincing.
1536
01:25:32,168 --> 01:25:33,711
He can't hurt you.
1537
01:25:33,711 --> 01:25:36,172
I bet he can do it quite easily.
1538
01:25:36,172 --> 01:25:39,467
-Drop it.
-Leilani, listen to him. Put the gun down.
1539
01:25:39,467 --> 01:25:41,886
-You don't have a shot. Just put it down.
-I do have a shot.
1540
01:25:41,886 --> 01:25:44,305
Why are you arguing with me about this?
1541
01:25:44,305 --> 01:25:46,974
Because you think you're always right,
and you're wrong about this.
1542
01:25:46,974 --> 01:25:49,310
I'm supposed to listen to someone
who's never held a gun before,
1543
01:25:49,310 --> 01:25:51,270
-and I'm the know-it-all?
-You refuse to take risks!
1544
01:25:51,270 --> 01:25:53,689
-This is a prime example.
-You're the reason we're here!
1545
01:25:53,689 --> 01:25:55,149
-This is your fault!
-Guys!
1546
01:25:55,149 --> 01:25:57,234
-Do you really wanna do this right now?
-Oh, my God.
1547
01:25:57,234 --> 01:26:00,112
-I wanted to go to the police!
-You were driving the car!
1548
01:26:00,112 --> 01:26:02,073
-I got kicked by a horse for you!
-Oh, my God.
1549
01:26:02,073 --> 01:26:04,367
-You ran from a dead body and left me.
-You guys are annoying.
1550
01:26:04,367 --> 01:26:06,077
I am alone in this relationship.
1551
01:26:06,077 --> 01:26:07,745
You watched my movie without asking me!
1552
01:26:07,745 --> 01:26:09,997
-Nobody cares about your shit.
-Stop! You sound like my parents!
1553
01:26:09,997 --> 01:26:11,624
Understand what I'm doing for once!
1554
01:26:11,624 --> 01:26:12,750
Be with me on something!
1555
01:26:12,750 --> 01:26:14,001
-One, two, three!
-Go!
1556
01:26:16,379 --> 01:26:17,838
Shit.
1557
01:26:19,256 --> 01:26:20,633
-Jibran, are you okay?
-Yeah.
1558
01:26:20,633 --> 01:26:21,717
Oh, shit.
1559
01:26:25,304 --> 01:26:26,847
Oh, my God.
1560
01:26:59,046 --> 01:27:01,716
Thanks to you guys,
we have the suspect in custody.
1561
01:27:01,716 --> 01:27:03,134
You're safe now.
1562
01:27:10,266 --> 01:27:11,892
Sure you're okay?
1563
01:27:11,892 --> 01:27:13,644
Yeah, I'm okay. Are you?
1564
01:27:13,644 --> 01:27:14,645
Yeah.
1565
01:27:15,604 --> 01:27:17,815
I knew you were gonna do
that "one, two, three" thing,
1566
01:27:17,815 --> 01:27:20,067
even though it didn't work any other time.
1567
01:27:21,068 --> 01:27:23,612
-You did everything. You did.
-No, it was equal. It was equal!
1568
01:27:23,612 --> 01:27:25,364
-You shot him!
-I know.
1569
01:27:25,364 --> 01:27:27,616
-That was amazing.
-I would rather forget that.
1570
01:27:27,616 --> 01:27:30,411
-Don't shoot anyone again.
-I will never shoot anyone ever again.
1571
01:27:33,080 --> 01:27:35,207
-What?
-I didn't say anything.
1572
01:27:35,207 --> 01:27:36,375
I know that face.
1573
01:27:36,375 --> 01:27:39,420
-What face?
-It's the "I wanna kiss you" face.
1574
01:27:39,420 --> 01:27:41,213
-No, no. No, I don't--
-Yes, it is.
1575
01:27:41,213 --> 01:27:42,590
I don't wanna kiss you.
1576
01:27:42,590 --> 01:27:45,926
I don't, so-- You're very arrogant. Gross.
1577
01:27:45,926 --> 01:27:47,136
Gross?
1578
01:27:47,136 --> 01:27:50,848
Wow, you wanna kiss me so bad,
like, with tongue and everything.
1579
01:27:50,848 --> 01:27:52,516
-I can tell.
-You are projecting.
1580
01:27:52,516 --> 01:27:54,101
-Oh, okay.
-I think you wanna kiss me.
1581
01:27:54,101 --> 01:27:56,020
-I wanna kiss you?
-You wanna kiss me.
1582
01:27:56,020 --> 01:27:57,646
And you're, like, doing this now.
1583
01:27:57,646 --> 01:27:59,482
Doing what? What am I doing?
1584
01:28:11,368 --> 01:28:13,204
Sorry to interrupt, lovebirds.
1585
01:28:13,204 --> 01:28:15,456
I gotta take you to the hospital,
have them check you out.
1586
01:28:15,456 --> 01:28:16,749
It's protocol.
1587
01:28:20,586 --> 01:28:23,756
Back-of-the-ambulance sex
is pretty freaky, right?
1588
01:28:23,756 --> 01:28:26,383
-I am so down.
-All right, let's go.
1589
01:28:27,092 --> 01:28:29,136
Are you gonna try that move
we saw in the orgy?
1590
01:28:29,136 --> 01:28:31,222
I'm gonna put in some work!
1591
01:28:31,222 --> 01:28:33,474
Mm-mmm, you don't sound right.
That's my line.
1592
01:28:42,399 --> 01:28:44,318
-Run, Leilani!
-I'm running.
1593
01:28:44,318 --> 01:28:46,403
-Holy shit!
-They're right behind us!
1594
01:28:46,403 --> 01:28:47,988
Let me lead, slow down!
1595
01:28:47,988 --> 01:28:49,824
-Run, run, run!
-Jibran, I'm running.
1596
01:28:49,824 --> 01:28:51,617
Don't tell me to run when I'm running!
1597
01:28:51,617 --> 01:28:53,536
They're right there! We're so fucked!
1598
01:28:55,079 --> 01:28:59,291
This is London, England.
Jibran and Leilani lost valuable time
1599
01:28:59,291 --> 01:29:02,002
after a heated argument
about the metric system.
1600
01:29:02,002 --> 01:29:07,591
With only two legs remaining, do they have
what it takes to win the $1 million prize?
1601
01:29:07,591 --> 01:29:09,134
We're actually doing it, Jibran!
1602
01:29:09,134 --> 01:29:10,970
I told you we could win The Amazing Race.
1603
01:29:14,056 --> 01:29:15,724
Okay. “For over 50 years,
1604
01:29:15,724 --> 01:29:18,769
enthusiasts have gathered
at Hyde Park to commemorate--"
1605
01:29:19,937 --> 01:29:21,772
-Uh-oh.
-What?
1606
01:29:26,735 --> 01:29:28,445
Oh, ****.
122643
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