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I still can't stop thinking about that
fascinating Oprah I saw.
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The myth of the happy single woman.
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Did you watch the cassette I sent?
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Oh, I accidentally taped over it.
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Oh, well, that's all right. I sent away
for the transcript.
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More Pete and Karen? No, I'm full.
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I always make a lot in case you bring
someone.
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That explains the fourth place setting.
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Better safe than sorry.
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Mom, I've been coming over here every
other Sunday for 12 years, and all that
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time, how often have I brought someone?
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Well, there was Chris.
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How is Chris?
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He's fine.
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Really good. He and Susan just had
another baby.
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I am telling you, if I were president,
macaroni and ham would be the national
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dinner.
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00:01:04,390 --> 00:01:07,270
Say, Allie, you know what you haven't
done for a while?
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What's that?
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Played a tune for us on the piano.
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Oh, yeah, that's true. You know what
else I haven't done in a long time is
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remind you that I don't know how to play
piano.
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You took five years of lessons. You must
remember something.
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I think I remember the Meow Mix jingle.
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Those drugs she took during high school.
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I didn't take drugs in high school, Dad.
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I was just so worn down from all the sex
and drinking.
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Well, you don't have to lie.
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I mean, we had marijuana in my day, too,
except we called it hemp then. You
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could get a half -pound bag for ten
dollars.
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Um, no, the reason I don't remember how
to play piano is because I never wanted
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to take piano lessons. I wanted ballet
lessons. Oh, but we gave you ballet
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lessons. You weren't graceful, so we
took you out of them.
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No, the school burned down and you
couldn't find another one.
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Oh, right.
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Your memory is so much better than mine.
Who's for mock apple pie? Wait, wait.
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Hold it, hold it. I don't believe this.
You lied to me. The school didn't burn
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down.
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For your own good, dear, the teacher
said you weren't progressing.
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00:02:11,120 --> 00:02:15,220
Well, so what? I love ballet. You had no
right to make that decision for me.
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Great. Now you're upset.
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Well, yes, I'm upset. I mean, I wanted
to dance in that recital. I had a simple
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dream, and now it will never come true.
You don't know what that's like.
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No, of course not.
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How could I?
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Sally, what are you going to play for
us?
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All I ever wanted to be when I was a kid
was a ballerina.
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I can't believe my parents took me out
of that class.
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00:03:02,790 --> 00:03:05,870
I mean, I really, I resent that. I don't
get childhood resentment.
50
00:03:06,330 --> 00:03:09,010
I mean, just let that stuff go. I did.
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00:03:09,890 --> 00:03:11,110
Forgot my birthday again?
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No problem.
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00:03:12,710 --> 00:03:14,850
A new dad every 18 months? Sure.
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I'm being sent away to boarding school?
Fine by me, you gin -swilling bitch.
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Hey, you know what would be fun?
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Is if you and I took night school ballet
class.
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Because then I could get this out of my
system and you could be there while I do
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it.
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Actually, I don't... Oh, come on. Hey,
oh, look. I just found the perfect class
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for it.
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Every Tuesday for six weeks.
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Housewives and tights after dinner.
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No, thank you.
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No, it says all levels welcome.
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Baryshnikov may be there.
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You like him.
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Oh, come on. Please do this for me.
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I'll give you a million dollars.
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All right. Okay.
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So, you're taking a dance class, huh?
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Sounds like fun.
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Joe, this is important to me. Go easy.
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00:04:01,430 --> 00:04:03,390
What? I mean it. That sounds fun.
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00:04:03,710 --> 00:04:07,150
Oh, sorry. Sometimes you get that tone
in your voice and I never know if you're
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mocking me.
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Ellen, I would never mock you.
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There it is again.
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I don't know what you're talking about.
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Okay, let's do this. Whenever you're
mocking me, you raise your hand, and
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you're serious, you keep it down.
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00:04:20,380 --> 00:04:21,380
Sure, Ellen.
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That sounds like a good idea.
83
00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:34,960
Let's get this over with.
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six Tuesdays of my life down the drain.
Oh, boy, that's the spirit.
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I'm gonna go get some water.
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Hi.
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00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,000
Wow.
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You're limber.
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00:04:53,780 --> 00:04:57,480
What? Ooh, that has gotta make you
popular.
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00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:12,880
I didn't catch your name.
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00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:14,760
Probably didn't throw it.
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00:05:16,820 --> 00:05:17,820
Maya.
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Hi.
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00:05:20,420 --> 00:05:22,660
Boy, you're limber, too. Am I in the
right class?
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00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:24,240
I hope not.
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00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:27,980
Good thing I'm wearing my thermal
tights. It's chilly in here.
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Chilly.
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00:05:48,910 --> 00:05:52,590
Listen, I'm taking off. We just got
here. I know, but I met this guy in the
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karate class down the hall.
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00:05:54,070 --> 00:05:56,770
He wants to take me to dinner, and he's
really cute. Well, what guy is cute
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enough to justify abandoning your best
friend for?
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Good God.
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Jerry, this is Ellen. Ellen, this is
Jerry.
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Hi. Hi.
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00:06:07,770 --> 00:06:08,770
Ready? Yeah.
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00:06:08,790 --> 00:06:12,550
Listen, Ellen, I'm sorry. This whole
ballet thing is really not me. Oh, well,
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hey, you gave it a shot.
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Remember me from Helping Hand?
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Yes.
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Peter, right? Right. Yes. How good.
You're taking this class, too. I teach
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Just something to do when I'm not
working, volunteering, going to law
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taking care of my grandfather.
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I know what you mean. Yeah, it's
amazing. I found time, too, you know,
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my stuff.
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Well, I better get started. Okay. Good
to see you again.
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Everybody,
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hi. Welcome to Adult Ballet.
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My name is Peter.
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We'll meet for six weeks, and then for
our last class, we'll give a recital
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where one of you lucky women will dance
the lead in Giselle.
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Pick me! Pick me!
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Oh, no.
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Competition.
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00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:03,020
Now, this is a class for all levels, so
we're going to be learning some pretty
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00:07:03,020 --> 00:07:06,700
complicated moves. But let's start with
a simple one that everyone can do. The
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00:07:06,700 --> 00:07:07,700
plie.
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And down to...
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00:07:22,860 --> 00:07:24,960
I brought this lasagna in from home, but
I don't want it. Do you?
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00:07:25,260 --> 00:07:27,420
As delicious as your cooking usually is?
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00:07:27,960 --> 00:07:28,960
No.
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See? I can never tell when you're
mocking me.
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I was.
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00:07:32,660 --> 00:07:35,840
Okay. Well, what happened to the hand
signal? I can't walk around like this
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day.
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00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:38,700
I'll tell you what. I'll let you in on a
little secret.
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00:07:39,100 --> 00:07:41,340
When I'm sincere, my faith stays static.
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When I'm mocking, my eyebrows have a
tendency to go up.
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Observe.
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That's a pretty shirt you're wearing.
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Sincere.
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I love humoring people.
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Mocking.
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I think you got it. Sincere.
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We're done now.
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Sincere. I find this very entertaining.
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Oh, mocking!
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Hey, I missed you this morning.
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00:08:04,900 --> 00:08:05,900
Sincere.
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00:08:06,460 --> 00:08:07,460
Yeah.
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00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:09,400
So how was ballet class?
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00:08:09,820 --> 00:08:10,860
Eh, it was terrible.
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I made a complete fool of myself.
Everybody laughed at me. Oh, I've heard
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laughs myself.
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What do you mean?
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This may come as a surprise to you, and
I know it'll fly in the face of
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everything you think of me, but I
actually studied ballet for six years
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up. I knew that.
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You did?
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00:08:27,060 --> 00:08:29,220
Yeah, you tell me every New Year's Eve
when you get drunk.
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1989, you were wearing a tutu when you
told me.
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00:08:33,919 --> 00:08:37,059
Well, the point is, I loved ballet, but
I had to give it up because I couldn't
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take all the teasing.
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Wait a minute. You took ballet for six
years? You can tutor me.
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I don't know. That was a long time ago.
Come on. Come on. The recital is in six
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weeks. I can live your dream. I can be
the ballerina you never were.
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I'll do it.
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That idea is just so crazy, it might
just work.
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00:09:02,890 --> 00:09:07,450
And changement, changement, changement,
changement, changement.
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00:09:08,490 --> 00:09:09,490
Go ahead and try.
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00:09:10,070 --> 00:09:11,650
And changement.
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00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:13,160
Sean's mom.
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00:09:13,180 --> 00:09:14,620
Sean's mom. Sean's mom. Sean's mom.
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00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:20,060
Okay. All right. Then we'll try it
together.
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00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:22,480
And... Sean's mom.
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00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:23,959
Sean's mom.
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Sean's mom. Sean's mom. Sean's mom.
Sean's mom. All right. Get out of here.
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go on.
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I... In a minute.
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00:09:30,580 --> 00:09:34,160
Jerry's picking me up here. Karate guy?
How's that going? It's going well. He's
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00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,260
cute. He's sweet.
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There's just one little problem.
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Let me guess.
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He's really dumb.
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Why would that be a problem?
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00:09:44,689 --> 00:09:45,689
What is the problem?
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00:09:46,310 --> 00:09:48,150
I think you'll be able to spot it for
yourself.
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00:09:57,650 --> 00:09:58,770
Jerry, you remember Ellen?
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00:09:59,090 --> 00:10:00,090
Sure.
189
00:10:00,830 --> 00:10:02,150
And that's Adam.
190
00:10:03,250 --> 00:10:04,250
Hiya. Hi, Adam.
191
00:10:05,110 --> 00:10:06,110
We should get going.
192
00:10:06,410 --> 00:10:09,190
You know, why don't you just run down to
the car and I'll be down in two
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00:10:09,190 --> 00:10:10,190
minutes. Okay.
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00:10:10,390 --> 00:10:11,390
See ya.
195
00:10:14,790 --> 00:10:15,790
Wow, wow, wow.
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00:10:16,710 --> 00:10:19,010
What am I going to do? It is getting
worse.
197
00:10:19,570 --> 00:10:22,670
Well, I mean, it's not that big of a
deal. If you really like the guy, buy
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00:10:22,670 --> 00:10:23,670
some new clothes.
199
00:10:24,170 --> 00:10:26,990
Just out of the blue? Well, act like
it's a special occasion.
200
00:10:27,370 --> 00:10:31,050
Sure, you know, President's Day is
coming up. You could buy him a stovepipe
201
00:10:32,150 --> 00:10:33,710
He probably has one.
202
00:10:37,350 --> 00:10:41,310
You know, some of these moves that you
have... Okay, Ellen, first, a few ground
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00:10:41,310 --> 00:10:42,310
rules.
204
00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:46,520
I may ask you to do some unconventional
things, but you must not question me.
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00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,300
I don't go by the book.
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00:10:48,580 --> 00:10:50,760
I'm not a puppet of the ballet
establishment.
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00:10:51,140 --> 00:10:55,320
In fact, they frown upon my unsanctioned
crowd -pleasing moves.
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00:10:55,980 --> 00:10:58,120
Now, let us continue.
209
00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:03,220
And change more, change more, change
more, change more, change more, change
210
00:11:03,220 --> 00:11:04,220
more.
211
00:11:12,919 --> 00:11:17,800
Ellen, five weeks ago I never thought
I'd say this, but you are better than
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00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:18,980
were five weeks ago.
213
00:11:20,620 --> 00:11:23,120
It's all because of you. I really think
I have a shot at Giselle now.
214
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:24,320
Well, who's your competition?
215
00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:27,380
Maya, or as I like to call her, Stupid
Maya.
216
00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:30,500
That's good.
217
00:11:31,060 --> 00:11:32,660
She sucks up to Peter constantly.
218
00:11:33,140 --> 00:11:34,400
Well, what are you going to do about it?
219
00:11:35,140 --> 00:11:37,420
I came up with that nickname. I don't
know what else I can do.
220
00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:40,600
Ellen, you've got to suck up to Peter,
too.
221
00:11:40,910 --> 00:11:45,070
Oh, I don't know. Ellen, how badly do
you want to dance Giselle?
222
00:11:45,590 --> 00:11:47,530
So bad I can taste it.
223
00:11:51,630 --> 00:11:52,630
Tastes like chicken.
224
00:11:59,030 --> 00:12:02,910
Peter, you know, I just want to tell you
that you're the best darn ballet
225
00:12:02,910 --> 00:12:03,909
teacher ever.
226
00:12:03,910 --> 00:12:04,910
Oh, thank you.
227
00:12:05,070 --> 00:12:08,110
You really improved yourself in just
five weeks. Well, who couldn't with the
228
00:12:08,110 --> 00:12:09,930
best darn ballet teacher ever teaching
them?
229
00:12:11,340 --> 00:12:14,060
I was thinking maybe we could get
together some night this week, you know,
230
00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:17,200
because I've only begun to scratch the
surface of telling you how great you
231
00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:19,000
Sounds fun.
232
00:12:19,180 --> 00:12:22,060
I can't tomorrow, though, because I'm
volunteering at Helping Hand.
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00:12:22,700 --> 00:12:25,820
Then on Thursday, I work at the animal
shelter. Friday, I do Meals on Wheels.
234
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,180
And on Saturday, I'm building a church.
235
00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:33,480
Well, I'm busy all those nights anyway
myself, you know, just donating my
236
00:12:33,480 --> 00:12:34,480
organs.
237
00:12:35,240 --> 00:12:38,020
Actually, the only night I have free
between now and the auditions for the
238
00:12:38,020 --> 00:12:39,020
recital is this Sunday.
239
00:12:39,120 --> 00:12:41,460
Oh, well, Sunday I'm having dinner with
my parents.
240
00:12:41,740 --> 00:12:42,740
That sounds fun.
241
00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:45,960
Okay.
242
00:12:48,020 --> 00:12:50,780
We're so happy Ellen finally brought
someone home.
243
00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:54,160
You know, she doesn't get a chance to
meet many people because she works so
244
00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:57,160
at the bookstore, which I'm sure she'd
sell the minute she got married.
245
00:12:58,820 --> 00:13:00,400
How do you like the wine, Pete?
246
00:13:00,600 --> 00:13:01,600
It's delicious.
247
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My father brought this bottle back
from... France after the liberation.
248
00:13:05,230 --> 00:13:07,010
I've been saving it for a special
occasion.
249
00:13:07,810 --> 00:13:09,410
And I think this is it.
250
00:13:11,710 --> 00:13:13,630
Oh, boy, Ellen, your parents sure are
hospitable.
251
00:13:15,210 --> 00:13:17,590
So for our recital, Peter's having us
dance Giselle.
252
00:13:17,830 --> 00:13:21,610
Oh. I hope you'll come, Mr. and Mrs.
Morgan. For you, Pete, anything.
253
00:13:24,290 --> 00:13:26,690
Who do you suppose you might pick for
Giselle, Peter?
254
00:13:27,070 --> 00:13:30,430
Now, Ellen, you know I can't tell you
that. Oh, I know, I know. But suppose
255
00:13:30,430 --> 00:13:31,430
could. What would you say then?
256
00:13:32,250 --> 00:13:33,250
Ellen.
257
00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:35,770
A lot of people seem to think it's
narrowed down to Maya and me.
258
00:13:36,130 --> 00:13:39,310
And Maya's a great girl, she is, you
know, apart from all the drinking.
259
00:13:40,530 --> 00:13:41,469
I know.
260
00:13:41,470 --> 00:13:42,670
I was surprised, too.
261
00:13:42,890 --> 00:13:45,650
But, uh, you know, that Evian bottle
that she carries around?
262
00:13:46,770 --> 00:13:47,770
Fuck.
263
00:13:48,910 --> 00:13:52,530
This is excellent turkey, Mrs. Morgan.
Oh, please, call me Mom.
264
00:13:55,290 --> 00:13:58,210
You know, she seems to be able to hold
her liquor, so if you want to give the
265
00:13:58,210 --> 00:14:00,730
part to Maya, I'd say go ahead and give
the part to Maya, you know?
266
00:14:01,290 --> 00:14:02,590
Who cares what she says about you?
267
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:06,540
You know, if I didn't know better, I'd
swear you were trying to influence my
268
00:14:06,540 --> 00:14:11,280
decision. I am. I must ban Chazelle.
269
00:14:11,480 --> 00:14:12,780
Ellen, this is making me very
uncomfortable.
270
00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:14,940
I don't care. Everybody has their price.
Name yours.
271
00:14:15,700 --> 00:14:17,140
I can't be bought.
272
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:20,420
Mr. Mrs. Morgan, thank you for a lovely
evening.
273
00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:23,160
Ellen, take me home.
274
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,400
Peter, Peter, wait.
275
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:29,980
Oh, that boy was our only hope.
276
00:14:31,600 --> 00:14:33,760
He reminds me a lot of myself at that
age.
277
00:14:48,020 --> 00:14:50,080
So, you ready for Ellen's big recital?
278
00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:51,699
Sure am.
279
00:14:51,700 --> 00:14:52,700
You look great.
280
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:54,280
So do you.
281
00:14:55,220 --> 00:14:59,040
Oh, I, uh, got that for you. Really?
Yeah.
282
00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:05,920
This looks so expensive.
283
00:15:07,180 --> 00:15:08,520
Happy President's Day.
284
00:15:09,980 --> 00:15:10,980
President's Day?
285
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,300
That's really weird.
286
00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:15,960
Oh, I can explain. I thought my family
was the only one who celebrated
287
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:16,919
President's Day.
288
00:15:16,920 --> 00:15:18,260
I got something for you, too.
289
00:15:23,420 --> 00:15:27,200
This is a clothing store, isn't it?
290
00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:35,500
So I didn't get the lead. Who cares?
291
00:15:37,260 --> 00:15:38,360
That's the spirit.
292
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:42,760
Besides, everyone knows the definitive
role in Giselle is the shrub.
293
00:15:46,880 --> 00:15:48,080
I know what she's thinking.
294
00:15:48,340 --> 00:15:49,900
I could have been the shrub.
295
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:51,920
Loser.
296
00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:56,380
Anyway, Peter's staging is so
traditional. The way we rehearse it is
297
00:15:56,380 --> 00:15:58,360
daring. Exactly.
298
00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:03,160
Who am I kidding? I'm a crummy shrub. My
parents are out there. They must be
299
00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:04,620
mortified. Don't be silly.
300
00:16:04,900 --> 00:16:05,900
They're beaming.
301
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:09,280
No one saw us come in, did they?
302
00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:11,960
I don't think so.
303
00:16:13,420 --> 00:16:15,500
Oh, an enchanted forest.
304
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:27,220
Good God, Paige, what are you wearing?
305
00:16:29,020 --> 00:16:30,100
Jerry picked it out.
306
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:31,480
Isn't it great?
307
00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:33,700
Yeah.
308
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,600
Thank God I didn't wear my plastic cow
suit.
309
00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:39,840
Two minutes, everyone.
310
00:16:40,160 --> 00:16:41,160
Feel the energy!
311
00:16:43,040 --> 00:16:44,240
Now, don't be nervous, Ellen.
312
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:47,260
I'm going to be back here backstage for
the whole thing.
313
00:16:53,140 --> 00:16:54,980
That's not how a shrub dances at all.
314
00:16:55,660 --> 00:16:57,440
Well, you haven't seen me do the wind.
315
00:16:59,660 --> 00:17:02,600
Why don't you make us dancers look bad?
Let me show you how it's done.
316
00:17:05,420 --> 00:17:06,420
That is good.
317
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:08,700
But it's too bad you can't dance all the
parts.
318
00:17:09,420 --> 00:17:10,420
Oh!
319
00:17:10,940 --> 00:17:12,079
Oh, my God, what happened?
320
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:13,440
My back.
321
00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:14,500
Oh. Can you dance?
322
00:17:14,940 --> 00:17:15,940
Of course I can.
323
00:17:16,900 --> 00:17:18,099
Oh! See?
324
00:17:20,280 --> 00:17:21,280
We're about to begin.
325
00:17:22,099 --> 00:17:23,099
There's no other choice.
326
00:17:23,319 --> 00:17:24,420
I'll have to dance Giselle.
327
00:17:25,460 --> 00:17:26,460
No.
328
00:17:27,109 --> 00:17:30,550
I'm sure you'd be a great Giselle, but
let me do it. I know how to do it. I
329
00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:31,550
won't let you down.
330
00:17:31,770 --> 00:17:33,150
All right, Ellen, the part's yours.
331
00:17:33,630 --> 00:17:35,470
Sam, Ellen will be Giselle.
332
00:17:35,710 --> 00:17:41,790
But she's not graceful. Not graceful.
Not graceful. Not graceful. Not
333
00:17:41,950 --> 00:17:43,310
Very graceful.
334
00:17:44,890 --> 00:17:46,010
Not graceful, huh?
335
00:17:48,370 --> 00:17:49,530
It's all coming apart.
336
00:17:50,830 --> 00:17:51,830
No, it's not.
337
00:17:52,030 --> 00:17:53,990
Adam, be my prince.
338
00:17:54,570 --> 00:17:55,570
Okay.
339
00:17:57,260 --> 00:17:58,320
Out of the dress, Grandma.
340
00:18:02,120 --> 00:18:03,480
You must be very proud.
341
00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:05,960
Oh, yes.
342
00:18:06,340 --> 00:18:08,180
This is the moment I've always dreamed
of.
343
00:18:12,700 --> 00:18:15,300
Ladies and gentlemen, there's been a
slight change in plans.
344
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:19,000
Dancing the role of Giselle tonight will
be Ellen Morkan.
345
00:18:55,180 --> 00:18:56,139
What are you doing?
346
00:18:56,140 --> 00:18:57,320
This isn't like choreography.
347
00:18:59,360 --> 00:19:00,360
It's better.
348
00:19:01,900 --> 00:19:03,340
Dance, Ellen, dance!
349
00:20:45,040 --> 00:20:46,040
Not graceful, huh?
26655
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