Original subtitles

Something good will happen at the end of the week. That's Tora.

Hear this new bloke say what the good happens.

Yeah, not as good as me. I've been at it for years.

Oh, Jack.

No, Sandra's right, Jack.

Everything he says comes true. What's yours?

Uh, Libra.

Uh, you will be faced with an important decision regarding the opposite sex.

Hey, are you coming out with me tonight then, Sandra?

I say it's coming true already.

Uh, be... Be careful.

No, no, I'm not coming out with you tonight.

Oh, two leave off. We made a date. My star says I've got to be careful.

Yeah, well, after last night, they're a bit late, aren't they?

I'll see you later.

Oh, dear. Hello, Ollie. What's up with you, then?

I've got to get married.

Blimey, who's the fella?

I don't know.

You mean there's more than one possible?

Don't be disgusting, Ollie. It means her star says she's got to get married.

Yeah, look, it says here.

Someone who is close to you is going to ask you a question that will make you

very happy. Oh, well, I can easily make that come true.

Would you like a sticky bun?

Oh, Tom!

I asked you a question, now you're very happy.

No, it doesn't mean that. It means that someone who is close to me is going to

propose to me. Oh, but we don't really believe all that horoscope rubbish, do

you? It's not rubbish. No, I read my stars every day and they always come

I'm a Virgo.

No, no, it's not true.

Come on, let's have a look what it says for Aries.

Here, using that chair, mate. Shift up there.

Come on, that's what it says for the old ram.

Now then. Oh, yeah.

Big changes are coming. You will go on a journey.

Well, that'll be a change, I must say.

Oh, no, look, here's a good bit. You will meet a nice boy who will make you a

good husband.

Well, that'd be nice for me, wouldn't it?

Not as vulgar.

Who's that?

What time is you out then?

Plenty of time yet, mate. Come and sit down, Fred.

Yeah, come and sit next to me, Fred.

Here, watch her, Fred. She's looking for her husband.

Oh, yeah? Anybody in particular?

No, she's not fussy. She can't afford to be.

Take no notice of him, Fred.

You're not married, are you?

No, I haven't been caught yet.

Oh, well, you never know what might happen, do you?

Oh, yes, I do. That's why I haven't been caught yet.

Here, look, it's a good bit for me, here, look.

Someone in authority may turn nasty. Stop it.

They don't turn any nastier than that.

Lurking about as usual, are you? That's right, yeah.

Have a little laugh out there, good.

I don't suppose anyone's bothered to read my notice I've put on you. No, we

ain't got time to read your rubbish, mate.

Yeah, well, I should find time to read my rubbish if I was you, cos it concerns

you lot.

Go and have a look at it now, come on.

We are being absorbed by the National Bus Company. Ah, yeah.

I'm awfully sorry to have to tell you, but there will be certain redundancies.

What does that mean?

It means you can hand in your uniform for a start.

Oh, good. Am I going to get a new one?

You're not getting one at all. You're getting a sack.

Sack? Yeah. Ah, well, I don't mind. I'm going to get married.

Must I say it?

Yeah. Well, all you've got to do now is find a fella to say it, ain't you?

Well, how come you're sacking Olive, then?

Because she's a trainee. All trainees will be given their notice by the end of

the week.

Other certain redundancies will follow shortly. Hang about, mate. You can't

nobody redundant without prior consultation with the union. And I'm the

steward, so that means me.

Don't give me that old acid, Arthur. All this has been agreed with the unions at

national level. Ah, just a minute. Nobody said nothing to me about it. No?

of course. The chairman of the national bus company didn't feel the necessity to

consult you, Arthur. Look, I'm the shop steward, aren't I?

Yes, well, if you'd have been at the union meeting here last week, you'd have

heard all about it, wouldn't you? Well, who else is going in? Well, read it,

mate. Can't you read, boy? Don't you know what it says? Look, it tells you

there.

Redundancies will be affected on the basis of last in, first out.

Who's that, then?

You.

Oh, that's nice. There is another basis for redundancy. Oh, yeah? What's that,

then? Them I can't stand the sight of.

No, you can't sack me.

Oh, no?

I could have a blooming good try. No chance, mate. I'm fireproof, ain't I?

I might inform you, Harper, that your number 11 bus route to the cemetery

has been taken over by the Eastern Bus Company.

So I should start looking for a job if I were you, mate.

Your days here are numbered, Harper.

Numbered? Well, I'll settle for it. It's true, Mum.

It's said that someone close to me is going to ask me a question that will

me very happy. That means a proposal.

Oh, well, eat up your dinner then, love. Because you want all your health and

strength if you're going to go through all that lot again.

Yeah. Men want so much.

Yeah. They want more than you, for a start.

Well, if you're going to marry a rich, handsome man, then we won't have to have

Mr Blake as a lodger.

Well, it's all in the stars.

Not a blimmin' nonsense.

It's not nonsense.

Must be a weightlifter.

Mr Wright will set his tender trap.

Oh, I'm here, Mr Wright. Come and trap me, whoever you are. Oh, for goodness

sake, let's have our tea in peace, will you?

That's it, Mum, the tea leaves.

Oh, no, I swore I'd never read the cup again. Not after I saw the ghost of your

father in the dregs last week.

I saw Stan in the cup yesterday.

He said he was going right to the very top. I thought he was a motor mechanic,

not a bloomin' lift attendant.

I swore I'd had this gift, and I would never treat the power lightly, only for

very special case.

But I am a special case. I must know soon, Mum, please.

Oh, all right, love. Put the lights out. All right.

Come on, draw the curtains, Mr Blake.

No, it's not. Now then, Olive, you know what to do. Three times round and upside

down. All right, Mum.

dark and thin.

Yeah, he'd stay thin living with you.

I'm so happy for you, my little love. Here, I think I'll have a try of mine,

what I've got.

Oh, look, it's in mine as well.

Wedding bills.

That means I'm going to get married.

Oh, no.

No, it can't be. It's not possible.

It is!

Is what?

Wedding bells.

Huh? We can have a triple wedding.

Huh?

Now, look here. I've got no intention of getting married.

Oh, it isn't what you want. If you say you're going to get married in the

couple, you'll get married.

If I get married, Mrs Butler, it'll be over my dead body. Well, that has

happened. Oh, no. Think of your poor bride being a widow on her wedding day.

Shut up and leave me alone. I'm not going to die.

No, you're right. You're not going to die. Well, it's not in your cup.

Yeah, and what's even better, I'm not getting married either.

Oh, yes, you are. It's in the cup.

Oh, yes, it's very definite.

Oh, oh, there's something else.

A lady.

A fair lady.

Oh.

Oh. What does that mean, then?

It means you're going to marry a fair lady.

What sort of fair lady would you like?

One who'll give me a hundred -yard start.

Now, come, come.

Now, what sort of a girl would you like to marry?

One with a moustache like mine.

No, seriously.

Well, if I ever do get married... Yes?

Which I won't, I think you'd have to be a woman who's a bit like my mum.

Sweet, home -loving, old -fashioned type.

Like your mum?

Yeah, a bit.

Oh. A good cook?

Oh, yeah.

Oh. Oh, pretty?

Oh, yes.

And fair, you say?

Oh, yes.

Yes. Well, I wonder where you'd find a girl like that.

I won't. Oh, yes, you will.

Oh, yes, you will. I know you will.

That was a very nice breakfast, eh, Mrs. Butler?

Oh, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I wanted to give you something substantial.

Well, I think you could say sausage, egg, chips and three rashers of bacon

fairly substantial.

Well, I've got to build you up, you know.

I only had one rasher.

Yeah, well, you were really built up enough, weren't you?

You think so?

I think I'd better get the work out of it. I'll come with you today.

Oh, all right, yes. I'll just go get my jacket.

Don't be like that for supper, will you? Because I shall have a lovely supper

for you and your slippers warming by the fire.

Well, there's nothing like good home comforts, is there? Oh, nothing.

You know, that's nothing to what I could do for you, Cyril.

Eh? Yeah, well, there is something you could do for me, as a matter of fact,

Mrs. Butler.

I didn't like to ask you before.

Oh, Cyril.

Me laundry.

Oh.

I'll see you tonight, then. Yes.

Oh, I wonder what we start, then.

I'll just have a look. All right, Mrs. B.

Oh, Dracula gone, has he? Blimey, I'd better get a move on. I'm late. Oh, that

clinches it.

I'm going to be married.

I thought Jolly Moo was going to get married.

Yes, and me as well. You know, it was in me cup last night, and it's in me

horoscope today. Just listen.

A good day for partnerships.

Well, that's definitely sure.

I'm going to marry Mr. Blake.

Die, eh?

Die?

Yes, it's in the stars, and you can't go against the stars. Listen.

You will receive a romantic sign.

And I have. I have received a romantic sign from him.

What's that, then?

His dirty laundry.

How romantic can you get?

I'll make the house your friend.

Fancy Mrs.

Butler falling for old Blakey. She must be putty. Yeah, well, they make a good

pair, then, won't they?

Hello, here he comes, Casanova. Judge.

Get your bus out. You're late.

Don't worry, Blake. We'll soon make the time up.

We won't stop to pick up any passengers.

You never do, do you?

Come on, get moving. The general manager's on the warpath.

Unless you want to be the next redundancy, Blake.

Sir, good morning, sir. What's good about it?

What are those two men loafing about for? Well, I was just... I don't want to

hear any more of your feeble excuses, Blake.

No wonder the company's losing money. Hey, you, get to work.

Yes, come on, Blake.

Is that the redundancy list you've got there, Blake?

Yes.

I like that, yeah. Wipe that stupid grin off your face.

Where is that list, then?

Well, I was just thinking... I want it on my desk in five minutes, or your feet

won't touch the ground, understand?

Got you on the run, haven't they, eh?

And now I'm going to get you on the run, Arthur. You're going right to the top

of the redundancy list. You're sacked next week, mate. Now, laugh that off.

That's not the word I like to use.

Oh, Jack, I want you to be the first to know. Me and Mr Blake's going to get

married. Are you?

Aye.

Isn't it romantic?

No. Here, Jack.

I thought you said he was marrying Olive's mum.

Yeah, I did.

Here. You know what this means, don't you? Know what?

He'll be a bigamist.

How's he going to get out of that thing? I don't know, mate. But I'm going to

make sure that he don't.

Well, that's all. The date done already.

Oh, hello. Here she is, the bride of Dracula.

When's a great day then, Olive?

Never the way Mr Blake's carrying on. He don't even seem to notice me.

Well, blimey, give him a chance.

You only decided to marry him this morning. Yeah, well, he always was a bit

slow. Here, Fred, I've got an idea.

Hey, Olive, look, what do you want to do? He said, gee him up a bit. Give him

few broad hints.

What do you mean?

Well, look, he'll be in his office now. Now, you go in there and chat him up.

You know, sit on his lap and then let nature take its course. Oh, I couldn't

that. Of course. Of course you could, couldn't you, Fred, eh? Yeah,

I mean, you can't expect the stars to do it all. You've got to give them a

gentle nudge.

Oh, perhaps you're right, because my horoscope did say today was the day for

catching up. Right, so get in there and catch up with Blakey. What should I say

to him? Oh, that's all, mate. Look, give him this cup of tea. You know what they

say? The weight of a man's heart is through his stomach.

Now, don't forget, he's very shy, so give him the works.

All right.

Come in.

Oh, it's you.

What do you want?

I've brought you a cup of tea, Mr Blake. Oh, give it here then. They say the

weight of man's stomach is through his heart.

Well, if it's canteen tea, it gives him heartburn.

Have you made your horoscope today?

No, and I don't want to, thank you. Oh, you should.

What are you?

I'm an inspector.

Oh, when's your birthday?

The 5th of November. Now, get out before I give you a rocket.

Oh, you're a Scorpio. Have you got a... in your child.

Here it is.

Bear and face will lead the pace.

That means me.

Does it?

Can I sit on your lap?

No, you can't. Don't you think this is an old trick?

Yes, come in. The only thing you're doing is get that woman out of here.

I was just going to.

You keep your sexual activity outside the depot. She was talking to John, but

know it. Blake, I'm not interested in the sordid details.

But just you remember, we are losing some of our bus routes. We can quite

lose an inspector too.

It's me, Mr. Flake. Oh, I mean you. I've got a lovely casserole, just like

Mother used to make.

Oh, well, I'll come up and wash my hands. Oh, no, no, no, don't come up. I

want you up here till I'm ready.

Ready for what?

For you.

Oh, just go into the living room and relax.

Olive's going out to bingo, so we shall be all on our own for supper.

I'll be happy to see you.

I think she's gone potty.

There's the other one. She's only half, partly.

Oh, no.

You dear fish, ping you?

No, don't you start again.

We're alone.

I've been waiting all day for this moment, counting the seconds.

Yeah, you want to stop that clock watching?

Do you like my new perfume?

It smells like fish and chips.

Oh, it is fish and chips. I kept it warm for you.

We can have it alone, cos Mum's going off to bingo.

Well, come on, let's have it right away. I've had a hard day today.

Oh, Mr Blake, control yourself.

You'll have to wait till Mum goes to bingo.

Well, if I've got to wait, I might as well have hers.

Eh? Well, she's got a lovely casserole.

Oh. Oh, well, I'll warm your slippers then.

Oh, all right then. Oh, come on, Mrs Butler, I'm ravenous.

Your patience has been rewarded.

Oh, I'm sorry, madam, I didn't realise...

Yes, Mrs Butler.

Oh, call me Ethel.

What's wrong, Mum?

Oh, this is nothing.

Mrs Butler, you didn't have to get up out of a sick bed to say to me.

Inspector,

I'd just like to look nice for you around the house, don't I?

Do you?

Oh, yeah, yeah, of course.

Well, now, I've got all the sandwiches ready there. You'd better eat them up

quickly and pop off to bingo.

Oh, no, Mum, I'm feeling a bit... tart tonight. I don't really want to go to

bingo. You go.

Oh, no, love. You go to bingo.

No, Mum. I don't really want to go to bingo tonight. I don't feel up to it.

go. Now, you're the one that's going. I'm the one that's not going. Mum, I

want to go to bingo. When you've made up your mind which one's going, I'm

starving to death.

Oh, you poor boy. I'm so sorry. I'll get your tea for you. Would you like to go

and get the paper?

It's just on the hall.

Ah, yes, love. You've got to go to bingo. Look, this...

Poor little thing. Is that what you thought?

Now he's mine.

He was my romantic side. He was in my cup.

And you thought he was yours.

Yes, I did.

Well, he's not yours. Oh, there you are. Let me help you off with your coat. Let

me help you off with your coat.

Mum, it's my big job.

And it's my last job.

Let me help you. Let me help you. Let me help you. Let me help you. It's all

right. Stop it.

He's calling me a... In fact, sorry, you're killing me.

Oh, well, see if you really want to help me, just give me my paper and let me

have my tea.

Oh, I'll get it. I'll get it.

I've got it.

There you are. Well, now you can have it.

Oh, I'll get you a cup of tea.

I've got you a bottle of beer.

I'll open it. No, no, I won't eat. I'll put...

tea with us. I'll get your fish and tea. I'll get your casserole. It smells like

burning rubber.

Oh, the casserole!

Oh, well, let's have it then. Come on. Here you are.

Wonderful.

What's this?

Well, I felt a bit peckish on the way home, so I had a bite. It doesn't

It's still warm.

Don't bother.

I'll go out and get something.

Oh, no, no, no.

No, you're not getting away from me tonight.

You're mine.

Choose? Yes.

Which one of us are you going to marry?

I'll marry.

Marry?

It's a funny joke, that is. Oh, don't you laugh at me. I'm serious.

You are serious.

So am I.

Now, look here.

I've got no intention of marrying anyone, least of all one who used to.

saying the matter at all, then? Yes.

You can say which one.

Yeah, yeah.

I'll need a little bit of time to think about it, won't I? Oh, yes. You've got

all the time in the world.

But I must know by tomorrow.

Oh, so must I.

Oh, good.

Ah, well, thank God it's my last day.

I tell you, mate, I wouldn't stay on here if they came to me on their bended

knees. Right.

I've got some very bad news.

You're not getting a sec after all. Oh, blimey, that's great.

You just said... Oh, yeah, well, I mean, I might consider staying on. I mean, I

know you can't manage without me.

Well, what happened then, Blakey?

It seems the men from the other bus company are taking over our routes.

gone on strike till you lot are reinstated.

Oh! Oh, there you are, Cyril. Oh, my God. Here comes his R .E. Oh, I'm in R

Mrs. Buck.

We've got some terrible news for you.

Oh, no.

Don't tell me.

The stars say I've got to marry you.

Worse than that.

It's you.

It's the horoscope, Olive's and mine. Listen, Olive, do not continue with your

long -term plans. And mine, a relationship must be severed

Just when we thought we were going to get married. You mean it... We can't

you now.

Neither of us. Isn't it awful?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Oh, it must be a terrible shock to you. Yeah, it is a shock, Mrs Butler, yes.

But I'll try and survive.

Yeah. and what a shame, and me and Fred was going to be bridesmaids.

Oh, look, there it is again.

Your cup, it's full, full of wedding pills.

Oh, that means it's on again.

It's on again.

You can't go against the tea leaves.

Oh, yes, I can.

That's not my cup, it is.

Jack! Oh, yeah, well, I mean, that fortune teller's a load of old rubbish,

he?

Blimey, is that the time? Come on, Fred, look, we're due out.

You're not due out for another 20 minutes yet.

Here, it's the first time he's ever left early.