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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,290 --> 00:00:10,590 Would you like your picture taken? 2 00:00:10,810 --> 00:00:11,930 Oh, not now, thank you. 3 00:00:12,890 --> 00:00:16,010 Finding everything satisfactory, miss? More than satisfactory. 4 00:00:16,329 --> 00:00:21,590 I've had a delicious dinner in a beautiful restaurant with the handsomest 5 00:00:21,590 --> 00:00:23,110 muffin this side of paradise. 6 00:00:24,850 --> 00:00:26,390 Stephen Q. Urkel. 7 00:00:31,390 --> 00:00:32,409 Oh, I'm mad. 8 00:01:36,260 --> 00:01:37,260 Spill this. 9 00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:40,320 And the bathroom needs some more tamper cakes. 10 00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:51,700 Hi, baby Kate. 11 00:01:51,940 --> 00:01:56,760 I'm a little food snafu, but I took care of it. Oh, Stephen, you're so brave. 12 00:02:12,300 --> 00:02:18,700 It's the rare condition this day and age to read any good news on the newspaper 13 00:02:18,700 --> 00:02:22,440 page. Love and tradition of the grand design. 14 00:02:22,680 --> 00:02:26,100 Some people say it's even harder to find. 15 00:02:27,220 --> 00:02:33,080 Well, then there must be some magic clue inside these gentle walls. 16 00:02:34,380 --> 00:02:41,320 Because all I see is the towel of dreams. Real love bursting out of every 17 00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:49,020 It's the bigger love of the family. 18 00:03:02,090 --> 00:03:03,710 Save the restaurant. You're a hero. 19 00:03:04,130 --> 00:03:07,150 Well, hero is such an appropriate word. 20 00:03:08,370 --> 00:03:12,690 Well, you may have extinguished those flames, but you've only ignited mine. 21 00:03:16,110 --> 00:03:18,390 Kiss me fast and kiss me hard. 22 00:03:19,350 --> 00:03:20,350 Remember. 23 00:03:21,690 --> 00:03:22,690 Not right now. 24 00:03:23,190 --> 00:03:24,530 What's wrong? Are you all right? 25 00:03:24,970 --> 00:03:26,330 How can I say this? 26 00:03:26,910 --> 00:03:30,490 I've been working in my laboratory for months, and I finally perfected my 27 00:03:30,490 --> 00:03:31,490 transformation. 28 00:03:32,040 --> 00:03:33,040 Oh, no. 29 00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:34,360 Oh, yes, stocky nipples. 30 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:38,860 Like tomorrow night, Steve Urkel will become Stefan Urkel. 31 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:40,260 Forever. 32 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:50,000 Steven, 33 00:03:52,940 --> 00:03:57,520 we've been over this before. Why in heaven's galoshes would you want to 34 00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:00,640 You're perfect just the way you are. 35 00:04:01,430 --> 00:04:02,670 Oh, thanks, Myra. 36 00:04:03,430 --> 00:04:04,450 I like me too. 37 00:04:07,530 --> 00:04:09,950 But the woman of my dreams fell in love with Stefan. 38 00:04:11,030 --> 00:04:12,090 You mean Laura? 39 00:04:12,410 --> 00:04:15,550 The cold -hearted ice princess who wouldn't know a good man if he fell in 40 00:04:15,550 --> 00:04:16,550 lap? 41 00:04:38,950 --> 00:04:39,909 I understand. 42 00:04:39,910 --> 00:04:41,170 You're a terrific lady. 43 00:04:41,890 --> 00:04:43,570 But I've always loved Laura. 44 00:04:43,990 --> 00:04:47,170 And changing back to Stefan or Kel is the only way I can get her. 45 00:04:47,890 --> 00:04:50,650 But... she's evil. 46 00:04:52,690 --> 00:04:54,390 Now, Laura and I were meant to be together. 47 00:04:54,610 --> 00:04:57,650 Like we're a team, a duo, a pair, a match, a twosome, an item. 48 00:04:58,890 --> 00:04:59,890 I see. 49 00:05:00,370 --> 00:05:03,450 So all I'm left with are shattered pieces of my broken heart. 50 00:05:40,140 --> 00:05:41,140 Lots of happy memories. 51 00:05:41,380 --> 00:05:43,780 And we'll always have this wonderful night to remember. 52 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:47,440 Pay up and get out, fire boy. 53 00:05:52,540 --> 00:05:54,120 Will you just remember this? 54 00:05:54,460 --> 00:05:58,940 Everyone else in the shallow world might love the suave and trendy Stefan or 55 00:05:58,940 --> 00:06:03,040 Kel. But I, Myra Boutros Boutros Monkhouse, love you. 56 00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:12,379 vision than me. 57 00:07:12,380 --> 00:07:15,660 It's pitch dark down at that alley. A bat couldn't see those pins. 58 00:07:16,540 --> 00:07:19,040 Oh, you're just upset because I whipped your butt. 59 00:07:20,860 --> 00:07:23,020 And Eddie was wearing rented shoes. 60 00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:28,920 Hey, if they lit that place properly, I could have bowled a 300 game. 61 00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:31,760 Yeah, with better lighting than a bazooka. 62 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:35,820 Come on, little guy. Let's get ready for dinner. 63 00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:39,000 Yeah, we already heard these excuses in the car. 64 00:07:51,990 --> 00:07:53,430 Well, then look in the paper and see what's playing. 65 00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:24,440 Larry Carl, I think you need glasses. 66 00:08:25,220 --> 00:08:27,160 What? Me? That's ridiculous. 67 00:08:27,580 --> 00:08:30,380 Oh? Then how do you explain what happened this morning at breakfast? 68 00:08:30,780 --> 00:08:33,600 What? You poured orange juice over your cornflakes. 69 00:08:36,020 --> 00:08:38,880 A man cussed out on his dairy products and it gets flack. 70 00:08:39,539 --> 00:08:41,059 You want to see this movie or not? 71 00:09:14,280 --> 00:09:15,280 configuring 72 00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:17,220 and I refuse to beg. 73 00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:18,920 Oh, I'm sorry. Please! 74 00:10:19,740 --> 00:10:22,420 Up your knees, woman. 75 00:10:23,380 --> 00:10:24,380 Now, 76 00:10:25,180 --> 00:10:28,840 my mind is made up. Now, I'm going to step inside that chamber and I'm going 77 00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:30,160 keep stepping into it every week. 78 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:32,840 Keep stepping into it? 79 00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:37,600 Ah, yes, a small technical matter. You see, the effects only last for a week, 80 00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:39,540 I just hop in every seven days for a little recharge. 81 00:10:43,660 --> 00:10:45,900 Can I at least give you one last kiss? Goodbye. 82 00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:18,480 That'll make me move. 83 00:12:08,810 --> 00:12:12,710 Wake me, shake me and break me. But baby, don't forsake me. 84 00:12:54,700 --> 00:12:55,700 It's good to see you. 85 00:12:56,380 --> 00:12:57,500 I'll put that away, man. 86 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:04,100 Well, it's good to see you again, too, Stefan. 87 00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:05,420 Hey, it's great to be seen. 88 00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:07,140 So, uh, what do you think? 89 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:10,820 Oh, man, you look like you just stepped off the cover of GQ magazine. 90 00:13:11,820 --> 00:13:12,820 GQ, really? 91 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:14,800 Strut it, BG. 92 00:13:30,220 --> 00:13:31,220 Let me guess. 93 00:13:32,140 --> 00:13:33,140 Giorgio Armani. 94 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:34,980 Close. Sears. 95 00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:39,800 Man, you look smooth. 96 00:13:40,540 --> 00:13:44,340 If you stood next to Denzel Washington, people would say, hey, there's Carl 97 00:13:44,340 --> 00:13:45,900 Winslow. And what's his name? 98 00:14:09,550 --> 00:14:10,550 You look sensational. 99 00:14:10,670 --> 00:14:11,670 Yes, I know. 100 00:14:13,330 --> 00:14:14,370 Well, come on, honey. 101 00:14:14,610 --> 00:14:15,830 Our public awaits. 102 00:14:16,410 --> 00:14:18,310 Well, let's not disappoint them. 103 00:14:20,050 --> 00:14:24,030 Oh, and listen. While we're gone, don't spend the whole night kissing and 104 00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:26,510 booping. Hey, I'll be a perfect gentleman. 105 00:14:26,770 --> 00:14:27,770 I was talking to Laura. 106 00:14:53,580 --> 00:14:54,580 It's dark in here. 107 00:15:02,700 --> 00:15:03,760 Harry, don't move. 108 00:15:04,020 --> 00:15:06,080 What? You have a bug on your dress. 109 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:07,480 A what? 110 00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:10,500 Tom, 111 00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:14,120 it's a brooch. 112 00:15:20,660 --> 00:15:22,220 We've been married a lot of years. 113 00:15:28,620 --> 00:15:31,740 Obviously having a problem seeing. I wish you'd break down and get glasses. 114 00:15:31,980 --> 00:15:34,500 Harriet, I do not need glasses. 115 00:15:37,420 --> 00:15:38,940 The bottle of wine you ordered, sir? 116 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:40,320 Thank you. 117 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:09,680 Excellent. And if I may, sir, I would like to commend you on your superb 118 00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:15,560 Hey, when I see something that I like, I order it. 119 00:16:17,180 --> 00:16:20,260 It's just not often a customer orders a $200 bottle of wine. 120 00:16:24,420 --> 00:16:25,420 $200? 121 00:16:26,060 --> 00:16:29,400 Carl, I thought you knew how expensive it was. 122 00:16:31,420 --> 00:16:32,420 Well, I... 123 00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:38,500 why you ordered it, you said, because it was a special occasion and you're with 124 00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:39,500 a special lady. 125 00:16:42,500 --> 00:16:45,820 Well, I was probably very sincere at the time. 126 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:48,560 Are we ready to order the entrees? 127 00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:50,200 We'll need a few more minutes. 128 00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:01,240 Carl, would you like me to read the menu to you? 129 00:17:02,180 --> 00:17:03,960 Harriet, That won't be necessary. 130 00:17:04,560 --> 00:17:05,560 I'm not a child. 131 00:17:05,839 --> 00:17:07,319 I'm telling you, you need glasses. 132 00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:08,520 Oh, don't be ridiculous. 133 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:10,560 Who can read in this stupid dim light? 134 00:17:10,920 --> 00:17:14,300 I mean, if this place charges enough, why can't they spring for some light 135 00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,300 bulbs? 136 00:17:56,590 --> 00:17:57,950 No. Hey, 137 00:18:00,010 --> 00:18:01,350 Grandma. How you doing? 138 00:18:02,190 --> 00:18:03,510 I'm chilling like... 139 00:18:21,070 --> 00:18:24,690 The last time you said no to a sandwich, Nixon was president. 140 00:18:31,830 --> 00:18:32,830 Mother? 141 00:18:33,190 --> 00:18:34,290 I'm not in the mood. 142 00:18:35,630 --> 00:18:37,790 I had a little mishap at dinner tonight. 143 00:18:38,330 --> 00:18:42,590 Mishap? You almost burnt down my favorite four -star restaurant. 144 00:18:44,550 --> 00:18:48,210 Carl, honey, why don't you break down and get you some glasses? 145 00:18:53,420 --> 00:18:54,420 Need glasses. 146 00:18:55,380 --> 00:18:56,380 Oh. 147 00:18:57,260 --> 00:19:00,000 You think farsightedness is a sign of old age, right? 148 00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:03,100 And if you were to get glasses, you'd be admitting that you're getting old. 149 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:05,660 No, that is... Well, yeah. 150 00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:08,700 Too bad you can't pull a Stefan. 151 00:19:09,440 --> 00:19:10,440 A what? 152 00:19:10,740 --> 00:19:13,640 Well, Stefan or Carol doesn't need glasses. 153 00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:16,280 But when he was Steve Urkel, he couldn't see zip without them. 154 00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:18,440 That's right. 155 00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:21,460 Sounds like what you need is a transformation chamber. 156 00:19:22,340 --> 00:19:23,340 Well... Good night. 157 00:19:37,980 --> 00:19:41,300 And so the word says, no, I left my wallet in the other pen. 158 00:19:44,940 --> 00:19:46,200 Stefan, you are too much. 159 00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:49,680 Hey, and I want to thank you for letting me use the transformation chamber. 160 00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:51,220 It's my pleasure, my man. 161 00:19:51,550 --> 00:19:54,710 But I got to warn you, though, this will do more than improve your eyesight. 162 00:19:54,910 --> 00:19:56,310 This is a cool chamber. 163 00:19:56,510 --> 00:19:57,890 Hey, chill, baby. 164 00:19:58,130 --> 00:19:59,150 I'm already cool. 11680