Original subtitles

I love the smell of bowling shoes disinfected in the morning. Smells like

victory.

Here's to the latest on Wozman versus vodka.

If you've got any questions, I'll be in my office. We don't have an office.

Your office, then.

Thanks, Frankie.

Is that a valentine?

No, it's a case. What do you mean Valentine?

Well, I just figured with Frankie's big humdinger of a crush on you. Frankie

does not have a crush on me. She has a huge crush on you.

I've never seen a hint of it. Besides, she's very happy with her boyfriend,

Leon. Like a guy named Leon could possibly hold on to a woman. You're a

of fixed graders, you know that?

Hey, my boy, I've got something for you. Oh, that's not a Valentine.

Is that a thing? Yes, it is. What do you got there?

The results of Ed's longevity test.

Thanks so much. There's this company that takes your blood sample and they

you fill out this big questionnaire and then they put it all together to

estimate your lifespan.

Personally, I think it's a load of hooey, but Eddie here couldn't resist.

Too curious. Had to know.

So, what did it say?

the sky tonight there I can keep by

your side watching the wide world riot and

hiding out I'll be coming

I just can't. I just don't believe it. I just can't get my mind around this. I

just, I can't. Ed, you gotta calm down. I can't. I can't. How can I calm down?

Like I said, that test doesn't prove anything. It's just an estimate.

83, Mike. 83. I'm dying. The average lifespan of an American male is 72. You

should be happier than 80.

Happy? Happy? Happy? I've only got 50 years left to live. Who do you expect?

,000? Get a hold of yourself.

You know what, Mike? Until you take the test yourself, you've got no right to

tell me how to feel.

I took the test.

What? I took the test. You took the test? I took the test for the hell of

thought you said it was a bunch of malarkey.

No, I said it was a load of hooey.

What'd you get?

What'd you get, Mike? 85. Oh, of course.

I don't know what I'm going to do those last two years without the money.

Still off?

My...

Oh, my gosh. Well, should I ask the obvious? You mean what's my favorite

peas? Gouda. No, I... What are you doing here?

I'll explain, but first coffee. I drove all the way from Boston without a stop.

Actually, first pee, then coffee. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

First? You're going to explain.

Well, how long has it been since we've spoken?

Um, a couple weeks. Actually, I called your number and it wasn't working.

Yeah, I moved out of that place.

You did? Why?

Because I moved in with a guy.

What guy?

His name's Peter.

He's an artist, a painter, totally brilliant.

Uh -huh.

And I quit my job at the bookstore to be his full -time assistant.

Oh, you didn't. So now I'm like Mrs. Peter Ivasevic, but it turns out that

so focused on his work, he doesn't even... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa, whoa.

Peter Avashevik? Yeah, have you heard of him? Yeah, I've heard of him. He's a

real painter.

And a real mess of a human being.

You're living with Peter Avashevik?

Correction. I just dumped Peter Avashevik, which is why I'm here.

Homeless, jobless, penniless, and at your mercy.

Oh.

Stella, Stella, Stella.

Just for a little while.

No. Whatever you need.

Shirley, this is the best tasting eggs I've ever had.

I'm glad you like them, Eli. They're duck eggs.

Shirley, where the hell you get duck eggs from?

The market had a special.

Oh, I'm sorry, but I can't eat nothing that come out of duck's ass.

Great galloping Gertrude. Eggs don't come from the ass, per se. Listen to

The birthday song brings in about two million bucks a year.

Hey, you mean...

Happy Birthday to You was written back in 1893 by a couple of schoolteacher

sisters in Kentucky, okay? It's still under copyright. Whenever they use it in

movies or TV, their estate gets paid.

Is that right?

Two million schlabada boobies a year. I mean, that is like Judd Nelson money.

Hey, I'm going to write my own birthday song. Sit back and just start counting

my... Schlabada boobies.

Yes. What's up, you guys? Still riding the goofy train again?

Frankie, come on. We've got to work through this. We've been working through

this all morning. Hey, hey, hey. The only reason you want to stay here is so

can keep working. Okay, Leon, I'm starting to get awfully upset to the

where I very well might burst into tears right in front of my boss and

coworkers, which is something I'd really rather not happen. I'm not leaving here

until we're... A tear is forming in my left eye. It's welling up, Leon. In

three seconds, it's going to blow. Fine.

I'll go.

I'm very sorry about that.

Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, dear person. Happy

birthday to you.

That's the same damn song.

You.

How long before you eat solid foods again?

Three more weeks.

These protein shakes suck so bad, I'd rather be fat.

Don't worry, you're still fat.

I'm kidding, man.

Seriously, what's the number these days?

Ninety -six.

Are you kidding? You lost 96 pounds already? Or another way to express it,

lost you.

What? Next time.

He's right over there. Oh,

yeah. She looks great.

How do I look?

Average. What? You're an average looking guy.

Do I know you?

What?

Just what?

I almost did it that time.

Your teachers are smart. I know who you are, you big goof.

Come here.

Oh, my Lord, you gave me a good scare there.

How long are you in town for? I don't know. I kind of moved back for a while.

You moved back?

Oh, my God, that's so cool.

So I got to tell you something. I've been replaying that night a thousand

in my mind. And so I think I made a huge mistake.

I mean, you offered to shine your love upon me. And I said, no, it was stupid.

It was so stupid. But now you're back. Right. And they offer still fans, right?

Oh,

my God.

What? So this is that he followed me here. I don't believe that.

Peter, what the hell are you doing here? Baby, I'm begging you. Come back to

Boston. Are you crazy? I don't even want to talk to you. I drove all night just

to hear me out. I'm sorry, Peter. I think the lady says she doesn't want to

to you. Who is this kid? I'm her soulmate, Warren P. Cheswick. Stella.

I'm going to the ladies' room.

When I reach turn, you won't be here.

No, wait. Sorry, sir. I need to see some ID.

This isn't... Stop. I love you. I do. No, you don't. You love to paint. That's

the only thing you love. You know that isn't true.

Oh, it is true, Peter. You love to paint. You love it. I'm amazed you

painting long enough to notice I was gone. Yeah, of course I noticed.

Well, you barely seem to notice when I'm there. What do you need me for anyway?

Why don't you just go out with a paintbrush or sleep with an easel or

Yeah, sleep with an easel, Peter. Look, I'm sorry. I really am. I feel terrible

about this.

Don't walk out on me. I've been working my whole life, and I'm so close to

really having this. It's just sometimes... Please, I should have spent

with you these past few months. But you didn't. Why?

You didn't. And things are going to be different from now on.

Don't believe him. He's a painter. Painters lie.

I drove all night just to see this face.

I'm dead.

Well, what about your Aunt Mindy? She was strong as a horse.

Only 77?

What about Mom's grandma?

Really? Wasn't there anyone in our family who lived past the age of 83?

Who?

Well, all right, where was she from?

Don't you know anything else about them?

All right, all right, Dad. Hit them straight.

I brought you some coffee and corn on the cob.

I didn't... I'm trying to stay one step ahead of you like Rader O 'Reilly did

with Colonel Potter.

Great. Shirley, great. Listen, it turns out I had a great -grandfather named

Samuel H. Stevens. He lived to be 101, so all I know about him is he was a

potato farmer on Long Island, New York. Could you try and find some information

about him? I want to figure out how he managed to live so long.

Do you have his phone number?

No. Shirley, he's dead.

I am so sorry, Ed.

No, we didn't...

Hey, did the Willisman file look okay? Yeah, no, it's fine. Listen, it's none

my business, but are you... I'm fine.

Totally fine.

Liam got a job offer in Texas. He wants to move. I want to stay.

Oh. He thinks I'm being selfish for wanting to stay, but he's the one who's

being selfish, I think.

Anyway, we'll look it up.

Yeah, I'm sure you will.

Thanks.

You know what? There's one more thing I should check on Willisman.

Well, if it isn't my future brother -in -law.

Stella Vasily. Man, I don't think so.

This is my so -called boyfriend, Peter Vasily.

Good to meet you. No, really, it's an honor. I love your stuff. I mean, your

paintings, your work, your paintings.

Very nice of you to say. Now, Stella tells me that you're a lawyer.

Yeah. You got a minute to talk about something? Oh, yeah, absolutely. Sure,

on back.

I have this really important show in Boston next week. Now, the thing is,

had some nice recognition in the past, but I feel like I'm finally on the verge

of really being one of the... The biggies. He wants to say the biggies.

No, I mean... I thought you were one of the biggies. Yeah. No matter how much

the case had, he never thinks he's arrived. He's always on the verge.

So how can we help you, Peter? I want my paintings to last forever.

I want to legally ensure that if anything happens to one of my paintings,

if someone else owns it, the person responsible has to pay me a huge

Not because I want the money, but I want to protect the work. My paintings,

they're my legacy, you know. They're the reason I was put on this earth.

They're all I'm going to leave behind.

Right.

So can I have them fax you my contract for the big show? Maybe there's some

language you could add that will help protect the paintings.

Sure. We'll get into it. Thank you.

Thank you.

Tell her. Bye.

Bye.

Wow.

Peter Ivashevic.

Yeah.

So, I got Shirley trying to research my great -grandpa. Right. She's on the

phone all morning. She hasn't been able to find out anything. Nothing.

No sign of the guy. Isn't that awful?

Yeah, I guess.

I guess. You know any of your great -grandparents?

Not really.

I think one of them may have been named Gary.

See, isn't that...

That's crazy, isn't it? Just three generations go by, it's like they never

existed. And you know why? Because they didn't leave a legacy. They left nothing

behind. That's not true. They left their kids and their kids' kids. So you're

the legacy.

Now you're going to have your own legacy.

No, Mike, you're missing the point there, sport. The point is these people

human beings with their loves, lives, hopes, dreams have been totally

They've been forgotten. They've disappeared into the void. The same is

happen to me, Mike. And you, too, 50 years from now. 52 years from now.

You're just a bash of it, cat.

Okay, now this guy's a whole different deal.

No void for this guy, man. He avoided the void, man.

I know. A void doesn't seem so bad.

Yeah, it's alright.

Banneker, you gotta see this.

That guy Peter, Stella's dating?

Turns out he's the toast of the art world. The toast!

Look at that.

Holy crap.

How am I going to compete with this? You can't. This guy's like three times your

age. He's a genius.

I know.

Don't you think I know?

God, I wish I was a Wonderton. If I could get the art and leisure section in

New York Times to label me a Wonderton, just listen, then I'd have a fighting

chance. Face it, Cheswick. He's Andy Warhol and you're Andy, I don't know,

Garcia.

Not even. You're screwed. That's where you are. Oh, oh, oh, and some gallery in

town is having these paintings shipped in. They're having this big whoop -dee

-doo for him tonight. Everybody's going to be loving him.

This is so incredibly sad.

Look at you, out in public, soldiering on as if everything's fine and with just

50 years to live.

You are a brave man and a demon. Funny woman, Molly Hudson. Look, I wouldn't

care. Peter Vash is going to live a lot longer, 50 years. He's going to keep

right on living because of these here paintings. If I could leave something

this behind, why, I wouldn't have a care in the world.

Molly, did you hear about Frankie's big fight with her boyfriend?

Indeed I did, Carol.

Here we go. Do you think Ed will make his move?

I don't know.

He's kind of thick that way.

Frankie and I work together, okay? You ever hear that whole thing about not

dipping your pen in the company ink?

Ew.

What, that's an expression?

That is called passion.

Hi. Hi, Peter. This is my sister, Carol. Peter.

Hi. Hi.

This is quite a sister you have here. Yes, yeah, that she is.

So, Peter, how long are you staying in Secuville? I'm sorry, but the gallery

owner is waving me over. If you'll excuse me. Carol, nice to meet you.

Tell her. Please don't start.

Honey, that is not the guy for you. We're not having this conversation.

Oh, I think we are. Right, because you can meet a guy for two seconds and size

him up better than I can after being with him for four months. I was just

watching you standing there completely neglected while Peter shook hands with

people. Then you introduced him to me, your own sister, and he totally blew me

off. Last time I checked, you weren't exactly married with the 2 .2 kids and

dog and the house and the white picket fence.

What is that supposed to mean?

Look, I'm sorry.

I just don't feel like the big older sister lecture right now.

When do you feel like the big older sister lecture?

Let's see. I have some time.

Never.

Great. Well, I'll be ready.

These paintings are amazing.

Really amazing.

Ooh, I like that red there. It's so angry, you know? Yeah.

Mike, we should buy one.

Are you crazy?

Come on, we don't own a yard.

Yeah, we do. We have that Monet poster in the sunroom. It's Manny, and that's

from my college dorm room. Come on, Mike.

No way.

Why not?

Because these paintings are ugly.

You just said they were really amazing.

I didn't. Yes, you did.

I did not.

What?

I'm so sorry, Professor, but Marianne just dusted your ass.

Hey, Eli, check this out.

It's the anniversary of your birth. It's the anniversary of your birth. It's the

anniversary of your birth. And I sincerely hope it's filled with joy.

Mirth.

Filled with mirth.

Yeah, that's better. It's this much better, but it's better.

Hey, how about you and I write the song together?

Man, you're wildin'. Oh, come on, Eli, please.

Split everything 50 -50. Dude, I'm not getting involved with you. Man, I

we were supposed to be friends. All I'm asking for is a little bit of help.

All right.

Seriously?

Yes. Okay, great, but the 50 -50 thing ain't gonna fly. I mean, this whole

wasn't my idea.

Sir, you can't smoke in here.

I'm not smoking. This is just for effect.

Ah, yeah, this is one of my earliest pieces.

And I have a real soft spot for it because I sense a real lack of

Guess whose parents are out of town this week?

Warren, what are you doing here?

Oh, you know, just seeing if the works of Peter Bakashukuluku are all they're

cracked up to be.

Frankly, I'm less than impressed.

A bash of it. Oh, God bless you.

I loved it.

Warren, this has been a great time.

Right, so what about coming to my house one night?

No parents.

We got bumper pool.

Warren, I'm sorry.

Listen, I'm a red -blooded American 18 -year -old male, okay? You can't just

offer an 18 -year -old male a chance to forget and then, you know, not follow

through. You're the one who turned me down, remember?

Yes, okay, you're right. And you know why?

Because you were being mature.

Because I was insane.

I gotta go.

Thank you.

Thank you, everybody.

When I first heard that Peter Ravasevich was in our humble town of Stuckyville,

I begged him to allow this impromptu showing of his works.

Thank you, sir, for sharing yourself with us tonight.

Cheers.

Thank you. Thank you very much. The honor is mine.

And please, if anyone has any questions about my work, don't hesitate to ask.

Yeah, over here.

Sorry. I have a question.

Okay.

Okay, thank you very much.

Just out of curiosity, is it that you can't paint a painting that looks like

anything, or you just don't want to?

I just don't want to. Oh, cool, cool. That's great. He just doesn't want to.

Woo!

Anyone else?

Ed, how did you know you wanted to be a painter?

I have wanted to paint since I was six years old. I don't know. I guess it's

just a feeling.

Yes, you, ma 'am, with the fuzzy red hat.

Okay. All right. Here we go.

Here we go.

Time to get creative.

Time to make some magic.

What's it going to be?

What's it going to be?

Hello, Mr. Canvas.

I'm your new buddy, Ed.

Am I a painter?

No idea.

That's what we're here to learn.

Not feeling it.

Fine. Good. That's good. That's good. A little writing. A little writing.

Okay. All right.

Novel. Short story.

Poem.

Say we start with a semicolon.

Better not film it. Okay, that's fine. It's all right. It's all right.

No sweat. Keep it moving.

Okay.

Okay.

Yeah. Yeah?

Oh, yeah.

Peggy, hey.

Hey. Oh, sorry.

Once again, completely unprofessional. He should just fire me.

Seriously, go ahead and fire me.

Do you need to take the day off?

Is that your way of firing me?

What? No, no. For a second there, I thought I'd take the day off with you

firing me. And even though I suggested it, I was really just bluffing.

No, I... Do you want to talk about it? God, no. I don't want to burden you with

my problems. There's so much work to do.

Here's a draft of Patty's vigilante's will, by the way. All right.

All right, well, you do want to talk about it. I'll be right over there.

Okay, I want to talk about it.

But I'm going to ramble and be long -winded because I'm emotional right now.

When I'm emotional, I tend to ramble and be long -winded. That's all right.

Leon and I broke up.

Really? Wow.

We had this huge fight about his new job.

I put my foot down. I said, I'm staying in Stuckyville.

And he said, well, I'm moving to Houston.

And that was it.

I'm sorry, Frankie.

Okay, so when I was at that art gallery thing... Yeah, how was that? Oh, it was

great. Mr. Artboy took questions from the audience, and I just, like,

him. That made him look like a child. Really?

Oh, yeah.

All right, so anyway, Pete did. I overheard him instead of talking.

He's not spending Valentine's Day with us. Ha! Okay, why not?

I don't know. He's got to work or something. I mean, is that insane or

I don't know. I mean, if the guy's got to work. Oh, come on.

We're talking about Valentine's Day with Stella.

I don't care if I was living the last day of my life. I wouldn't do that.

And tell me, young Cheswick, is there a reason you're telling me all this? Oh,

yes, my rapidly diminishing friend. There is indeed.

Bella Bethy is going to be all alone at the Route 46 motor lodge.

And I have myself a plan.

I'm going to need your help on this one, though.

We'll talk later.

All right, Eli, let's see what you got. All right, we're going to try something

slow.

Happy birthday, baby.

Happy birthday to you.

Happy, happy, happy birthday.

Birthday, baby.

Happy, happy, happy.

What? Oh, come on, this is great. We're riffing. You know who we're like right

now? Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder.

You know, it'll take a stadium of Einsteins to untangle your brain.

Ebony and ivory live together in

perfect harmony.

You go side by side on my piano keyboard.

Oh, Lord, why don't we?

Ebony, ivory, living in perfect harmony.

Yeah, sure. I have some information on your great -grandfather. Oh, good. What?

I located a 76 -year -old woman named Annalise Johnson whose father had a

farm adjacent to your great -grandfather's potato farm. Her father

great -grandfather were best friends.

That's great. How'd you manage to track all that down?

Through a series of phone calls with civil servants.

I've always been beloved by common folk.

Right. So did that woman say anything about my great -grandfather? Yes, I

with her a few days ago.

Samuel Stevens did, in fact, live until the age of 101.

He died in 1956.

Wow, 1956. Wow. Anything else?

Mrs. Johnson said that she was going to send a letter to you with any

information she had about your great -grandfather. I was hoping it would

today. Thank you. That's impressive.

You really nailed that assignment.

Just keep that in mind when Miss Hector makes her inevitable play for my job.

Shirley, understand, Frankie's a lawyer.

You're, you know, my assistant.

I think we're all extremely aware of that.

You're intimidated by my talent.

No, this ain't going to work. I'll tell you what. You write your birthday song.

I will write mine. Whoever's is better wins.

All right, bet. Can Shirley be the judge? Fine.

Done and done.

Why do people always say done twice? I've always wondered that.

This ain't so bad. A little circle here.

A couple of dabs of angry red.

And some splat action.

Mike, what?

Nothing, honey. Just organizing my tools. I'll be up in a minute.

If you come up right now, we can still do it.

Otherwise, I'm taking a bath and going to sleep.

Okay, that's done.

What are you doing over there? Another great work of art?

Trying to figure out what should we put on my tombstone. You know, something

that sums up my existence. So far, I have...

Here lies a man that will be completely forgotten.

And I thought I was depressed.

I got a bunch of possibilities.

Left nothing behind.

Not sure whether he's here or not.

Here lies a man that practiced reasonably good hygiene.

What about defender of those in need or a good and loyal friend?

I thought I'd go with that whole it's a wonderful life thing, but I just... I

mean, look at him, Ashford.

Look at this guy.

He's leaving something.

He's going to go on living past his 83 years or his 101 years, whatever it is.

Me? I'm a blip.

You're not a blip.

No, I am. I'm a blip. I'm a blip. You're talking to a blip. Say hello, blip.

Aren't we all blip?

I'm blipier.

I'm going to take off now. All right.

Frankie.

Yes?

You know, it's Valentine's Day.

And a great one at that.

I mean, yeah, you're depressed because Leon's on a plane to Houston. I'm

depressed because...

I'm a blip. So maybe we should go down with a smiling goat and try and drown

sorrows in the greasy fat of two smiling goat half -pound bacon cheeseburgers.

You're on.

Blip.

You feel comfortable with these, honey?

I'm sorry.

I'm just on myself right now. This whole Leon thing, it's just got me... You can

call me a blip. No, no, it's my stupid sense of humor. Call me a blip. No, I

don't think that... Call me a blip or you're fired.

Blip.

Let's get some burgers, shall we?

How do you even know what room she's in? I flipped the guy at the front desk at

Jackson. She's in 212.

You gave the guy 20 bucks?

No, 10.

Alexander Hamilton's on the tent. You slipped him a Hamilton.

All right, whatever. Come on, let's just focus, okay? So when we get up on that

roof, you're in the anchor position. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm always in the

position. All right, let's go. Let's do this.

You know, just because I lost 96 pounds doesn't exactly make me Spider -Man.

Just climb, Vaticor.

I left the instructions to these guys to do.

Oh, come on, Stella.

Don't be like that.

They need four new kids for the show.

If this guy hadn't loaned me a studio, I would be back in Boston right now.

I thought you said things were going to change.

They are going to change, but the Boston show, this is the big one. If things go

well, my paintings will end up in major museums, and once they're there, they're

there forever.

Okay.

Go paint.

Okay, listen, just let me get through this one, and I promise you we'll have

greatest Valentine's Day ever, okay?

Oh, my God.

Celebrity, Cupid has come to wish you a happy Valentine's Day.

Warren!

Is that that kid again?

Not a kid, sir. A man. A man in love with this woman. Look, kid, you better

out from there or you're going to hurt yourself.

Cupid, the God of Valentine's Day frowns upon you.

You only get so many Valentine's Days in your short life.

And you want to waste your painting?

Instead of spending it with this heavenly creature that God created?

I smite you, sir. I smite you. I gotta go. I mean, can you hand over?

What do you mean? What's over? I can't do this anymore, Peter.

I don't have that many Valentine's Days left.

Yes!

I've decided to name this breakup the St.

Valentine's Day Massacre.

You know, St.

Valentine's Day and all. I didn't know you were required to name your breakups.

Oh, I always do.

Let's see. There was Roy's Revenge, 7th grade. The Freshman Folly.

Black Wednesday.

Thanks. Black Saturday.

Bad Friday because Steve DelGarcia broke up with me on Good Friday.

Whatever. The three -point heartbreak because I was dating the captain of the

basketball team and we broke up on the phone long distance.

Nice.

Well, I think that maybe brings us up to date. Hey, Stephen, my attorney at law,

the man in charge of protecting the Abashevik legacy from the Philistines,

his trusty sidekick... Frank. Frankie. Ah, right, right, right.

Frankie, you have the most expressively exquisite hands I've ever seen.

Have you ever done any painting?

Uh, me, no.

Where's Stella, I wonder?

Oh, Stella.

Stella, Stella, the love of my life.

She ended it all tonight for good.

My boyfriend broke up with me, too.

Really? Did you paint too much, too?

That was my crime.

Same reason my first three wives threw me out.

You were married three times? Oh.

Frankie, would you... Care to join me and my newfound friends right over here

for a commiseratory cocktail?

No, thank you. I'm fine. I've got a bacon cheeseburger.

Oh, come on, nonsense. You and I, we can help each other to forget.

She said she's fine.

Well,

if you do change your mind, I will be the famous artist back here in the

Okay.

What? What's this surprise?

Congratulations, dance. We have the proud owners of our very own Peter

Oh, my God. You bought one?

Hey, we can enjoy it forever, right?

Yeah, forever.

I thought you really wanted one of these.

I feel horrible saying this, Mike, but I think you were right about this artist.

This painting's kind of ugly.

No, I don't think so. I'm kind of coming around on it.

Well, maybe it's just this one.

What are you talking about? I think this is one of his better works. I mean,

look at that angry red and those splats.

Those must have been hard to do.

I don't know if he's

pathetic. You know, he's made sacrifices.

Yeah, but people like that with tons of talent and success, You think they have

these great lives.

But you can see he's miserable.

Yeah, he's miserable, but he's accomplished something. He's leaving

behind, you know.

Unlike me.

Destined to come and go without a trace.

Like my great -grandfather. Most everyone else, for that matter.

Blips.

Blips.

You think about things a lot, don't you?

Yeah. Probably too much.

Me too.

Thanks for the burger. You're welcome. I'll see you tomorrow.

Okay. Okay.

It's a beautiful work of art.

Well, maybe it's upside down. It's not upside down. Those red things clearly go

at the bottom.

Michael, what's that on your shirt?

Is that paint on your shirt? That's paint on the back of your shirt.

What are you talking about? You painted this, didn't you?

Oh, you are in so much trouble. You have no idea.

If you think about it, it's sweet.

It's not sweet. Oh, sure it is, too. It is sweet. You wanted a painting. We

couldn't afford it, so I toiled away painting it myself. Toiled away? What

it take you, like, six minutes? Oh, I find that insulting to my craft.

Hey, Ed.

Peter. Hey.

Hey, sorry if I was a jerk back there.

Forget it. So I'm leaving town tomorrow. I just wanted to see if you had time to

look at my contract. Yeah, yeah. I think I may have a way to get you what you

want.

Really? Yeah.

Paintings will last forever.

Thanks. Yeah.

I'll call you when I get back to Boston. All right.

Hey, Peter.

Three wives, and you work all the time.

Are you ever happy?

Does it matter?

And you see this?

This is eternity.

And this, that's a man's life.

That's not the important thing.

But this is all we have. Not Picasso.

This is Picasso's life. This is most people's.

But Peter, what if you couldn't paint? What if you couldn't be an artist? What

if you had no talent?

What would you do then?

I don't know.

Art is my life.

This is everything.

Okay, so you'll stay as long as you need to, right? Thanks.

Are you sad?

A little.

Oh, I know. I'm sorry.

But you did the right thing. That guy is nothing but trouble.

Okay, don't lecture now.

I'm not lecturing.

But would it kill you every once in a while to listen to your older sister?

I didn't do it because... I know, I know, I know. I'm not the boss of you. I

never was. I never will be.

Just date guys within five years of your age for a while, okay?

Okay, big sister.

Ed,

the package has arrived.

What package? From the woman who knew your great -grandfather.

Thanks, Shirley.

Dear Mr.

Stevens, I'm pleased I can help you learn about your great -grandfather,

H. Stevens.

Your great -grandfather was a very special man.

He was beloved by all who were lucky enough to know him.

Where others sipped at life, Samuel gulped it, cup after cup, day after

day. He had a gift for making every moment an event.

No one knew this better than your great -grandmother, Martha.

They were happily married for 68 years.

Of his many passions, Samuel's most fervent was gathering the neighborhood

Friday nights to make wine.

We'd laugh, sing, dance, and most of all, stomp grapes.

The wine was never much good, but it didn't matter.

Samuel created a life where all that did matter was the stomping.

Yours, Annalise Johnson.

Happily, bappily, happily, bappily, happily, diddly -dee. A Berkeley,

Berkeley, Dirtley, Berkeley, one, two, three.

Happily, dee, dee, dee. A Berkeley, doo, doo, doo.

Happily, bappily, birthday to you.

Stage is yours.

All right.

Yeah! Yeah, come on, come on, come on, come on, clap your hands, come on, come

on, come on, clap your hands, everybody, come on, clap your hands, come on, come

on, come on. Yeah, y 'all ready to rock?

Yeah. How do you even punch in the pinch? You can grow another inch. The

pass and you are heavy class.

A to the A to the P to the P -Y -P.

Happy, happy birthday, G.

Believe that's it, I'm just trying to rip.

As long as whack, you ain't got no gift.

I'm going to do my thing, I'm going to scream and shout.

I'll raise the bull. Go to the campsite. Say ho!

Ho! Say ho!

Ho!

Yeah, that's how we do it, right?

Yeah.

Who won?

I'm going with the brothers.

That's my Charlie.

Yeah, that's what's up.

I didn't know we were allowed to use a black guy.

Hello, Owen.

What are you doing?

Just thinking about how there's so many people in Asia.

You shouldn't leave your door open.

Or you're going to rob me.

Thank you for the lovely Valentine's Day present.

Yeah, I've got one for you.

Are you serious?

Oh, please.

Oh, my God, you are... I hope you're serious. God doesn't like a liar.

I'm the luckiest human being in the history of mankind.

It's midnight in February. Why are we here?

Because he's dead. He loves gathering people at midnight. It's not normal.

Hey, there you are. This is great. Okay, you all don't even know why you're

here? All right, ladies and gentlemen, this is the reason you're here. Fresh

grapes. So shoes off, everybody, and let's start stomping, because tonight we

are making our own wine, my friends.

Ooh!

Ah!

I'm telling you, this is fun.

Okay, I'm in.

Screw it.

Yeah!

Come on, Frankie.

Why don't you do one of Ed's stupid things? You're officially one of the

Come on.

Everybody is a star Who could rain and chase the dust

away Everybody

To shine To come out On a cloudy day

Dude