Original subtitles

Name three of America's founding fathers.

King... I'm gonna stop you right there. I was gonna say Martin Luther King.

Junior. You're gonna fail this test.

Correct.

Coming in with corn!

So what'd I miss while I was in Iowa?

A razor?

Oh, you're talking about my mustache.

What do you think?

I think it's even worse than your chain wallet.

A choo -choo chain?

I love this thing.

Henry, will you please talk some sense into your friend?

Jasper, I do not like that mustache.

Thank you.

I love it. What?

I said I love it.

Dude, would you grow that bad boy?

Well, if you mustache.

I must.

I grew Oz at my cousin's wedding in Iowa.

Dude, respect.

Are you guys messing with me right now? I don't know what you're talking about.

Facial hair.

Can you guys watch my class, Tara, while I... What is on your face?

Well, if you mustache.

That's my new mustache.

Like it? Can I be 100 % honest here?

Thank you.

Love the mustache.

What? Love the mustache.

Love the mustache.

Love the mustache.

Otto loves it, too.

Where'd you get the bird?

He's our class parrot, Otto.

It's my turn to take care of him for the weekend.

Aww.

Well, hey there, buddy.

Oh, my name's... Yeah,

don't touch him. He doesn't like that.

Don't touch him.

So he talks and stuff?

Nah, he just picks up phrases and repeats things sometimes.

Otto, say sweet dash, Jasper.

Sweet dash, Jasper.

Sweet dash, Jasper.

I gotta go grab his bird seat for my car. I have a driver's license.

Sent by mistake. Why do we have to keep things? Established.

Hey, come on. Let's get back to studying history.

What? How can we study our past when we got a talking parrot and a mustache in

our present?

You know, there could be a mustache in your future.

You really think I should grow one? Yes.

You could have a mustache as Henry Hart and as Kid Danger.

Dude, if I had a mustache, then I would be Man Danger.

I just got chills. What?

Hey, be quiet.

Why? Because I don't want Piper to walk in here and hear you say that Henry is

Kid Danger. Henry is Kid Danger.

Henry is kid danger. Henry is kid danger.

See, that's what I didn't want to happen.

It all just kind of happened. I wanted an after school job, but then an

indestructible superhero hired me to be his sidekick.

Now we blow bubbles and fight crime.

Feels good.

Otto that I'm Kid Danger, Charlotte. Yeah, not a great move, Charlotte.

I didn't mean to. I was trying to get you guys to stop saying that Henry is

Danger. Henry is Kid Danger.

Henry is Kid Danger.

I have a problem.

I have a solution.

Sorry, Otto.

Blame Charlotte. No!

You can't kill Otto.

It's not his fault.

Yeah, it's your fault. Yeah, that's why I said blame Charlotte.

Look, we can talk about whose fault it is later.

Yours.

Right now, we have to deal with the fact that Piper's about to walk in here and

hear, Henry is in danger.

Okay, new plan, new plan.

You go outside and stall Piper for as long as you can.

How am I supposed to do that?

I don't know, just tell her that you lost a retainer and she needs to help

find it. I don't have a retainer. My teeth are perfect.

I lost my retainer last week. I've been using the paper clip. Works just as

well.

Look, I'm not going to say... I lost my retainer. That's a terrible excuse.

Okay, then make up a new excuse, okay? I don't care, Charlotte. You're the smart

one. All right, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

Hey, help me bring this seed stack inside.

Uh, you can't go inside.

Why not?

Because.

Uh.

I lost my retainer and I need you to help me find it.

But your teeth are perfect.

I know.

Because I have a retainer.

Which I lost.

And now my teeth are going crazy.

You gotta help me find it right now. Why can't you just use a paper clip? Girl

code.

Really? Girl code.

Girl code.

Help me hide out a little upstairs until we figure something out.

Alright, what do we tell Piper when she comes back and there's no auto?

Uh, that someone broke it and stole it. Yes!

Wait, where are you going? I got a great idea, Henry. Henry is in danger.

Henry is in danger.

Yeah, I know that, Otto. Shut your dang beak.

What was that?

Uh, I don't know, but I think I saw a retainer in those bushes.

What did you just do?

Oh, I threw a pot of plants through your door.

Why? Uh, to make this place look like a juicy crime scene. You're welcome.

All right, now hit me.

In the face.

Why would I hit you in the face?

Because when the cops get here, I need them to think that I put up a fight.

They're not going to believe a kid with a mustache just ran away.

Dang it, you're right.

Yeah, I am.

Now hit me. In the face.

What was that?

Nothing, nothing. Just keep looking for my retainer. I found it.

Found what?

Your retainer.

Yeah, okay, thank you. Wait, what?

I've got it right here.

Wow.

I can't believe...

your teeth were going crazy and you needed to retain her right now so put it

girl code

robbers. What robbers?

Where's Otto?

They took him, but not without a fight, which you can see from my face.

Where's Henry?

He got scared and ran upstairs.

Of course he did.

I'm gonna go check on him.

Who are you calling?

The cops. This is obviously a juicy crime scene.

It is a juicy crime scene, isn't it?

Hold still. Hold still. I'm trying to get it out. I'm trying to do it. Do you

want it out or not? Yes, I want it out. Okay, well, then just chill. All right.

Oh, oh. My gosh, your teeth are perfect.

I know. I get a lot of compliments.

Guys, stop kissing.

We have a crisis downstairs.

What? We're not kissing. I'm just trying to get this retainer out of Charlotte's

mouth. Yeah, Piper made me put it in, and now it's stuck.

Hey, my retainer case. Where'd you guys find this?

This is your retainer?

If it came from that case, then yeah.

Just run away. You're kind of kissing me.

Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew.

So, where's Otto?

Henry is in danger.

Hey, what's up, man? We got a little bit of a situation here.

I heard Jasper has a mustache. Now let me see it.

Jasper, come here.

Oh, Captain Man, that's a sweet sash.

Jasper's stash is sweet!

You like?

Yeah, that is a very mildly leaped sweater.

Has the whole world gone crazy?

Crazy for Jasper's stash.

You're getting a raise, buddy.

Yes! Look, later on, we can all give some love to Jasper's lip sweater.

Can and will.

Right now, we got a problem, okay? Because Piper's talking bird found out

I'm Kid Danger, so now we're hiding it in my closet so it doesn't tell the

secret to everybody in Swellview.

You got yourself quite a pickle, my friend.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Here's what I'm thinking.

All right, I'm going to go to a pet store. I'm going to find a bird that

exactly like the one that... Ah, stupid.

Okay.

What you need is a bird clone.

What? Can you clone a bird?

Yeah. You can clone a bird.

Do you need a feather?

Yeah. Just needs a feather.

We can get a feather.

Great. You got us a feather. Choice clones a new bird that don't know

from nothing.

kill the old one, swap in the new one, bada -boom, bada -bing, Mishwas and

Jasper go to the bed in cages.

Yeah! Eh, let's not kill the old one.

Potato, potato, just bring us a feather.

Potato, potato.

Potato, potato, potato, potato, just bring us a feather, you spicy tomato!

Um... Alright.

Easy enough. I'll get a feather.

Henry is in danger.

And he really likes saying that. Yeah.

and they want to talk to you and Henry.

Then we will go downstairs.

Let's go.

Fantastic. I'm excited.

Yeah. Get a feather.

Did one of you just say something?

I said, Henry kissed a stranger.

Sure did.

Mom told you to stop doing that.

feathers are you then I caught the bird thief's ninja star midair and I

was gonna throw it back at him but I have a code I won't kill

I'm like Batman if Batman had a mustache.

And what were you doing during all this?

Um, I was upstairs.

Hiding?

No. Crying?

No. Just write down crying?

Blondie was crying.

Hey, what are you doing?

I'm taking a bunch of all -by -my -selfies.

Wait, all -by -my -selfies?

Yeah, sad pictures of me being alone because someone stole my bird.

I post them online and people give me attention.

Does that work?

Oh, heck yeah.

Look at how many thoughts and prayers I've gotten.

That's a lot of T's and P's.

Of course it is. Look how fat I am.

Hey, Pablo.

Sherry. This is our police sketch artist. We need you and your cowardly

to tell him what the thief looked like.

Oh, I don't think he got a good look at the perp. This guy ran away pretty

quickly.

Actually,

I didn't run away quickly.

Okay, so I actually did get a good look at the perp.

I know exactly what the perp looks like.

You do?

Yeah, I do.

Then tell Pablo exactly what he looks like.

What? I didn't say I knew exactly what he looks like.

Oh, you said exactly.

With infinite.

Then I will describe to Pablo exactly what he looked like.

Wow. That's a lot of eye contact, Pablo.

I got it!

Henry is in danger.

Shut up, Otto!

Sorry for slamming the door.

And his left eye was brown, and his right eye was also brown,

and that's all the perp's face parts.

Let's see it, Pablo.

Is this the man who stole the bird?

Go get him, boys.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, who's this?

Uh, that's my friend, Charlotte.

Your real name?

It is not.

She's good.

A candlelight vigil is being held tonight at a Swellview home for Otto,

Swellview Junior High's beloved class parrot.

Otto was kidnapped earlier today by this man.

That's right, Mary.

A police department spokesperson said, hey, wait, that guy looks familiar.

Let's go live at the candlelight vigil with Brian Bender. Oh, I know him.

He's Brian from the news, where I work.

Thanks, Mary. I'm here with Piper Hart, who is sad.

This isn't about me, Brian.

It's about Otto.

And the GoFundYourself account I set up for my pity party.

I am accepting donations now.

It's very brave of you.

I know.

But good news. Police say a specially trained bird -sniffing snake is being

brought right to this location to help find Otto.

Wait, what?

Yes.

Boy, a special bird -sniffing snake is on its way, and police say it will

definitely pick up Otto's scent and lead them right to wherever the thief has

hidden Otto.

Oh.

Okay. Great.

I will stay here, then.

This has been Brian the Fender Bender with the KLVY News Team. I'd like to

a shout -out to Mary from the news where I work.

Hi.

Come on, come on, come on. Pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up.

Hey, Henry.

What's up?

Hey, did Schwoz clone a new auto yet?

Uh, hang on.

Are we close?

I think so.

Schwoz says we're close.

All right, well, tell Schwoz to hurry up, because there's a bird -sniffing

on its way, and they're going to find Otto in my closet, and everyone's going

hear... The moon landing was fake.

Hey, wait a second. Otto, stop saying that. Henry is in danger.

Dang it!

Well, why can't you sneak Otto out of the house before the bird -sniffing

even gets there?

Because my house is surrounded by people holding up picks of candles on their

phones and donating to Piper's GoFundYourself account. I need that new

up and clone a new auto.

Okay. Anytime you say, hurry up and clone, that's when the mistakes happen.

But it's safe, right? Like you've cloned things before?

Yeah, I've cloned myself.

I mean, I myself have cloned many things

that are not me.

Schwoz, did you clone yourself?

Yeah, that's what I'm thinking too. Yeah, the long no makes it sound like

lying. Oh, totally. The short no is always true. The long no, that means

lying. Oh, God, the club is done.

Everyone can move on.

Ah!

Ah!

Oh, wow!

He looks exactly like Otto! Yeah, that's the point, sweetheart.

It's exactly the same in every way?

No. Pretty much.

He just hasn't learned to say Henry is Kid Danger.

Henry is Kid Danger.

Henry is Kid Danger.

Nice going, sweetheart.

So how long did it take you to grow that sweet stash?

About four days. Four days, that's it.

I was in Iowa.

Ah, that makes sense.

What's the holdup? The bird, snake, and snake is here.

Yeah, we had a little problem with the first clone.

Oh, but the new new clone is done, and we're leaving right now. Wait, wait,

was the problem with the first clone?

Schwoz said Henry is to danger in front of it, and... Henry is to danger.

Henry is to danger. Henry is to danger. Henry is to danger.

Henry is to danger. We'll call you back.

No, no, no, don't, don't, don't, don't.

This is where you get a lot of problems.

We are out of time. Just give me something. Anything that looks like a

Yeah, give me the first one.

Fine.

He's not ready yet, but here is your bird.

I can solve.

I will let it out.

After the conga line!

All

right,

people here, I'm coming through. Make a hole, make it wide.

Oh, look, it's Captain Man. And he's got the real Otto.

Did you find Otto?

Sure did, little girl. Here you go.

Looks like he's been microwaved or something.

Oh, well, you know, the sickos that bird -napped him did not treat him very

well.

But when I found those people, I beat them.

Good idea.

I got a better idea. Let's turn the volume down on the...