Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,474 --> 00:00:09,441
Okay, whose epically bad idea
was it
2
00:00:09,443 --> 00:00:10,976
for you to have carpool duty?
3
00:00:10,978 --> 00:00:12,478
Your mother's.
4
00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:14,646
She had to work this morning,
so I'm here.
5
00:00:14,648 --> 00:00:16,382
I don't even know
what I'm doing here.
6
00:00:16,384 --> 00:00:18,050
Do I get a gun?
No!
7
00:00:18,052 --> 00:00:19,485
Well, I mean,
a taser would be fine.
8
00:00:19,487 --> 00:00:21,553
All you have to do
is open the car door
9
00:00:21,555 --> 00:00:23,222
and help the kids out
with their stuff.
10
00:00:23,224 --> 00:00:24,890
Help the kids out?
11
00:00:24,892 --> 00:00:27,026
I mean, if they were
legless vets, fine,
12
00:00:27,028 --> 00:00:29,361
but these sticky
little twerps... i mean...
13
00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:30,529
Just be helpful.
14
00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:32,297
It's pathetic, okay?
15
00:00:38,138 --> 00:00:39,738
Morning.
16
00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:43,142
Bye, daddy.
Love you!
17
00:00:44,144 --> 00:00:45,377
Welcome to hell, kid.
18
00:00:49,582 --> 00:00:51,083
Geez.
19
00:00:51,085 --> 00:00:52,885
Got a lot of books in here.
20
00:00:52,887 --> 00:00:54,253
You don't look that smart.
21
00:00:57,357 --> 00:00:58,424
Open the door.
22
00:00:58,426 --> 00:01:01,160
Open... The door!
23
00:01:01,162 --> 00:01:02,394
Unlock it!
24
00:01:17,610 --> 00:01:20,579
You know, you could be
the ugliest kid I've ever seen.
25
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:23,816
Go away.
26
00:01:24,884 --> 00:01:27,853
Open the door.
Just open it.
27
00:01:27,855 --> 00:01:29,555
I'm here to help you!
28
00:01:29,557 --> 00:01:32,224
Respect this reflective vest!
What is the matter with you?!
29
00:01:32,226 --> 00:01:33,692
Open the door!
30
00:01:33,694 --> 00:01:36,628
What, are you a moron?!
Go! Get out of here!
31
00:01:36,630 --> 00:01:38,097
Go to another school!
32
00:01:43,903 --> 00:01:46,138
Excuse me.
What are you drinking?
33
00:01:46,140 --> 00:01:47,739
Breakfast beer.
34
00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:50,642
Alcoholic beverages are not
allowed on school property.
35
00:01:56,749 --> 00:01:59,051
Feisty.
Who is that?
36
00:01:59,053 --> 00:02:01,720
That's miss Crosby...
A.K.A. "The eviscerator."
37
00:02:01,722 --> 00:02:02,721
She's a wrestler?
38
00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:04,656
No. What?
39
00:02:04,658 --> 00:02:06,725
She's the strictest,
meanest teacher
40
00:02:06,727 --> 00:02:07,993
you could ever meet.
41
00:02:09,762 --> 00:02:11,396
Sounds like a real wildcat.
42
00:02:17,271 --> 00:02:19,304
♪ I'm back
43
00:02:27,847 --> 00:02:29,314
♪ I'm back
44
00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:32,918
welcome to my humble abode.
45
00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:34,653
Oh, I can't believe
we've never actually been here.
46
00:02:36,190 --> 00:02:38,690
Loving the kitsch thing. By choice.
Mm, yes.
47
00:02:38,692 --> 00:02:41,093
It's like living in a swap meet.
48
00:02:41,095 --> 00:02:42,427
Where's Danny?
49
00:02:42,429 --> 00:02:44,263
Oh, he's in his room...
uh, back corner.
50
00:02:44,265 --> 00:02:45,631
Bye, mom.
Okay.
51
00:02:45,633 --> 00:02:47,099
Hmm.
52
00:02:47,101 --> 00:02:48,467
This house is making me
crave casserole
53
00:02:48,469 --> 00:02:49,968
for some strange reason,
which is very odd
54
00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:51,603
because I haven't
the slightest idea
55
00:02:51,605 --> 00:02:53,205
what "casserole" actually is.
56
00:02:53,207 --> 00:02:55,374
So, what is
this massively important thing
57
00:02:55,376 --> 00:02:56,542
you have to tell me?
58
00:02:58,278 --> 00:02:59,378
I'm in love.
59
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,113
Say what?
60
00:03:01,115 --> 00:03:02,447
Mm-hmm.
61
00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:04,049
Her pupils turned
all heart-shaped.
62
00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:05,684
This is a disaster.
63
00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:08,554
Why? I mean, isn't your mom
falling in love a good thing?
64
00:03:08,556 --> 00:03:10,822
Not if you're me.
We're the perfect pair.
65
00:03:10,824 --> 00:03:13,058
She's the Bernie taupin
to my Elton John.
66
00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:14,459
Who?
See?
67
00:03:14,461 --> 00:03:15,994
This is what I'm worried about.
68
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:18,297
My mom is the only one
that gets me.
69
00:03:18,299 --> 00:03:20,399
I've never felt like this
before... ever.
70
00:03:20,401 --> 00:03:23,135
I mean, I-I'm pretty sure
he's my soul mate.
71
00:03:23,137 --> 00:03:25,304
And when we finally meet,
I know...
72
00:03:25,306 --> 00:03:27,206
whoa, whoa, whoa.
You haven't even met?
73
00:03:27,208 --> 00:03:28,707
Oh, no.
No, darling, no.
74
00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:30,709
I-I just froze
as soon as I saw him.
75
00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:32,544
My heart stopped.
I couldn't move.
76
00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:33,879
I couldn't speak.
77
00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:35,747
And then... then...
78
00:03:35,749 --> 00:03:37,749
Then I had a moment
of self-reflection.
79
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:39,251
You?
Mm.
80
00:03:39,253 --> 00:03:41,820
I mean...
Of course you did.
81
00:03:41,822 --> 00:03:44,223
But the period of mourning
my first husband is over.
82
00:03:44,225 --> 00:03:46,825
Time to stop burying my grief
in a series of random men.
83
00:03:46,827 --> 00:03:48,393
That was mourning?
84
00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,329
Oh, sure. Yes, darling.
It's a British thing.
85
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:51,997
But it stops now.
No.
86
00:03:51,999 --> 00:03:53,699
Time to get serious, and time
for a real relationship.
87
00:03:53,701 --> 00:03:55,500
And I'm telling you...
this one...
88
00:03:55,502 --> 00:03:58,237
This one is second-husband
material for sure.
89
00:03:58,239 --> 00:03:59,204
Ohhh!
90
00:03:59,206 --> 00:04:01,273
Lulu, I am so happy for you.
91
00:04:01,275 --> 00:04:03,609
And I am going to help you
in any way I can.
92
00:04:03,611 --> 00:04:05,744
Thank you.
93
00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:07,379
Well, maybe she's just dating,
all right?
94
00:04:07,381 --> 00:04:09,414
My mom dates.
It's no big deal.
95
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:12,184
Dating is one thing.
I can deal with dating.
96
00:04:12,186 --> 00:04:13,852
But this Patrick guy...
97
00:04:13,854 --> 00:04:16,021
I think my mom
has fallen hard for him.
98
00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:17,356
Why is that so bad?
99
00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:19,391
Because when
our moms are in love,
100
00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:21,526
that's where
all their attention goes.
101
00:04:21,528 --> 00:04:22,861
We just disappear.
102
00:04:22,863 --> 00:04:24,896
They don't mean it,
but that's what happens.
103
00:04:24,898 --> 00:04:26,198
I don't know about you,
104
00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:28,800
but I like my family
just the way it is.
105
00:04:28,802 --> 00:04:30,135
Yeah.
106
00:04:30,137 --> 00:04:32,571
We have to make sure
this doesn't happen.
107
00:04:32,573 --> 00:04:35,007
I will help any way I can.
108
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:38,410
Cannon?
109
00:04:38,412 --> 00:04:39,645
Yep.
110
00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:41,246
Are you worried that mom's gonna
111
00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:43,415
fall in love with someone
and get married again?
112
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,816
No. No chance.
113
00:04:44,818 --> 00:04:46,318
Usually, people look at me
114
00:04:46,320 --> 00:04:48,553
and they realize
it's not worth losing a finger.
115
00:04:48,555 --> 00:04:50,088
Good.
116
00:04:50,090 --> 00:04:51,923
'cause, I mean, this,
what we've got going on...
117
00:04:51,925 --> 00:04:53,392
it's awesome.
118
00:04:53,394 --> 00:04:56,228
Just the three of us, you know?
Tight family.
119
00:04:56,230 --> 00:04:58,063
Got everything we need.
120
00:04:58,065 --> 00:05:00,265
Couldn't agree with you
any more, Danny boy.
121
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:02,501
I got it.
122
00:05:02,503 --> 00:05:04,636
Touch the door, you're dead.
123
00:05:08,007 --> 00:05:09,975
Oh.
124
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:10,909
Gorgeous.
125
00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:11,977
What?!
126
00:05:12,945 --> 00:05:14,479
Geena, would you
do me a big favor?
127
00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:15,981
Would you wait at the car
for sec?
128
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:17,182
I just want to say good night
to the kid.
129
00:05:17,184 --> 00:05:18,150
Okay.
Thanks a lot.
130
00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:20,919
Cannon, what are you doing?
131
00:05:20,921 --> 00:05:23,255
That is my teacher.
You can't go out with her.
132
00:05:23,257 --> 00:05:24,823
It's... it's unnatural.
133
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:26,491
First of all, she asked me out.
134
00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,694
It was like the fish
jumped into my bowl.
135
00:05:28,696 --> 00:05:30,128
What do you want me to do,
throw it back?
136
00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:32,931
Yes! Especially
if the fish is my teacher...
137
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:34,700
my crazy teacher, Cannon!
138
00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:36,435
What did you want me to do...
she was wearing them stockings
139
00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:37,869
with that black thing
running right up the back.
140
00:05:37,871 --> 00:05:39,037
You know what I'm saying?
141
00:05:40,039 --> 00:05:41,606
Just relax...
it's just one of those
142
00:05:41,608 --> 00:05:43,108
"where you from?
Who do you know?"
143
00:05:43,110 --> 00:05:44,309
Kind of coffee dates, okay?
144
00:05:44,311 --> 00:05:46,712
Take it easy.
145
00:05:46,714 --> 00:05:50,349
This is bad.
This is very bad.
146
00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:56,088
Excuse me.
147
00:05:57,457 --> 00:05:58,824
Do you know where I can register
148
00:05:58,826 --> 00:06:00,592
to set up a booth
for sports day?
149
00:06:01,327 --> 00:06:02,561
Yeah.
150
00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:05,063
Uh, it's...
it's right over there.
151
00:06:05,065 --> 00:06:07,232
Thanks.
Mm-hmm.
152
00:06:08,634 --> 00:06:09,701
Whew.
153
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:10,836
Hi.
Hi.
154
00:06:10,838 --> 00:06:12,070
I just met the cutest guy.
155
00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:13,505
Okay, Terry, me first.
156
00:06:13,507 --> 00:06:15,140
My soul mate...
he's here.
157
00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:17,209
Oh! Where is he?
158
00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:19,044
He's over there.
Oh.
159
00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:21,513
Oh, isn't he perfect?
160
00:06:21,515 --> 00:06:24,249
Yepper.
Super-perfect.
161
00:06:24,251 --> 00:06:26,051
Okay, so, where's your guy?
162
00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:28,153
Hmm? Oh! Um...
That was, uh...
163
00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:29,688
That was... that was...
that was nothing.
164
00:06:29,690 --> 00:06:31,356
You know what? Back to you.
165
00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:32,491
Okay.
166
00:06:32,493 --> 00:06:34,259
I am not freezing this time.
167
00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:36,595
Watch my trip move in action.
168
00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:37,896
What's that?
169
00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:40,932
Well, I trip,
I fall into his arms,
170
00:06:40,934 --> 00:06:42,434
the cleavage takes over.
171
00:06:42,436 --> 00:06:43,535
Never fails.
172
00:06:43,537 --> 00:06:45,437
Oh.
173
00:06:53,247 --> 00:06:54,513
Down goes Lulu.
174
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:03,121
Oh, come on!
175
00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:04,523
He had both feet in!
176
00:07:04,525 --> 00:07:06,391
No, his left foot was out.
177
00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:07,926
Hello again.
178
00:07:07,928 --> 00:07:09,094
Hey.
179
00:07:09,096 --> 00:07:10,629
I just want the cowboys to lose.
180
00:07:10,631 --> 00:07:12,631
Yeah, so you can sneak into
that wildcard spot
181
00:07:12,633 --> 00:07:14,599
with a higher
conference win/loss percentage.
182
00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:17,269
Look at you,
dropping the sports knowledge.
183
00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,404
Oh, well, my father
raised me on sports.
184
00:07:19,406 --> 00:07:20,772
What can you do?
185
00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:22,374
I'm Terry.
Patrick.
186
00:07:22,376 --> 00:07:23,708
So, what brings you
to town, Patrick?
187
00:07:23,710 --> 00:07:25,377
I'm divorced.
188
00:07:25,379 --> 00:07:27,212
I wanted a change of scenery,
so I opened my practice here.
189
00:07:27,214 --> 00:07:28,547
I'm a pediatrician.
190
00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:30,816
Really? Wow.
'Cause... this is so weird.
191
00:07:30,818 --> 00:07:33,819
Um, my friend Lulu
is looking for a pediatrician.
192
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:35,287
How old is your friend Lulu?
193
00:07:35,289 --> 00:07:37,956
Uh, it's for her son.
He's 12.
194
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,826
Well... Here's my card.
195
00:07:40,828 --> 00:07:42,427
Tell her to give me a call.
196
00:07:42,429 --> 00:07:43,495
I will.
197
00:07:44,397 --> 00:07:45,931
Uh, uh, did I, uh, notice
198
00:07:45,933 --> 00:07:47,999
a-a "centipede" game
in the corner?
199
00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:49,634
Ohh. Walk away
while you can, doc.
200
00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:51,136
I am unbeatable.
201
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:52,838
Let me get this straight...
you love football
202
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:55,507
and the second-greatest
video game ever invented,
203
00:07:55,509 --> 00:07:57,476
next to "Asteroids."
Next to "Asteroids."
204
00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:01,480
Well, I got to take off.
205
00:08:01,482 --> 00:08:03,014
Wait...
don't you work here?
206
00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:04,483
Yep.
207
00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:06,284
So I'll stay.
208
00:08:06,286 --> 00:08:08,653
And I'll take off.
209
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,590
- You good?
- Yeah.
210
00:08:11,592 --> 00:08:12,757
See ya, Terry.
211
00:08:12,759 --> 00:08:13,892
Bye.
212
00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:16,528
Hope I see you at sports day.
213
00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:18,096
Yeah.
214
00:08:21,601 --> 00:08:23,635
I'm assuming, because I coach,
215
00:08:23,637 --> 00:08:25,804
that, uh,
teaching is quite rewarding.
216
00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:27,939
I mean, it would be great
if it wasn't for the kids.
217
00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:29,641
That's what I thought
about parenting.
218
00:08:38,651 --> 00:08:40,452
Excuse me.
What is this?
219
00:08:40,454 --> 00:08:41,820
W-w-what's with
the waterworks here?
220
00:08:41,822 --> 00:08:43,021
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
It's nothing.
221
00:08:43,023 --> 00:08:44,656
It's just...
huh?
222
00:08:44,658 --> 00:08:46,324
It's just I'm... I'm going
through menopause and...
223
00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:48,226
No talking about that
at dinner...
224
00:08:48,228 --> 00:08:50,695
or, you know, anyplace else,
for that matter.
225
00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:53,365
It's... it's just that I'll
never have children of my own.
226
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:54,900
Uh, that...
that would be a fact.
227
00:08:54,902 --> 00:08:58,803
But listen... you said, uh,
you hated children anyway.
228
00:08:58,805 --> 00:09:00,171
W-w-w-what... what... what...
what are you talking about?
229
00:09:00,173 --> 00:09:01,239
Who could hate a child?
230
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:02,874
You clearly just said...
231
00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:06,177
I love a man with fire.
232
00:09:06,179 --> 00:09:08,747
Oh.
It's one of those.
233
00:09:08,749 --> 00:09:09,915
Huh? One of what?
234
00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:11,583
No wonder
you ordered a big steak.
235
00:09:11,585 --> 00:09:13,351
There's two of you.
236
00:09:14,655 --> 00:09:17,155
Ooh, I like you, Cannon.
You are funny.
237
00:09:18,725 --> 00:09:20,425
Oh, no, no, no.
Thank you.
238
00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,496
Hey, have you
talked to Michael today?
239
00:09:24,498 --> 00:09:26,031
Only like seven times.
240
00:09:26,033 --> 00:09:29,100
Has he... Mentioned anything
going on at his house?
241
00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:32,771
You know, is Lulu still having
those feelings for that guy?
242
00:09:32,773 --> 00:09:34,339
Oh, you mean Patrick?
Is that his name?
243
00:09:34,341 --> 00:09:36,608
Yeah, and Mike was
kind of freaking out about it.
244
00:09:36,610 --> 00:09:37,776
He'll be fine.
245
00:09:37,778 --> 00:09:39,578
What I'm getting at is Lulu.
246
00:09:39,580 --> 00:09:42,847
She's, uh... She's pretty driven
love-wise, isn't she?
247
00:09:42,849 --> 00:09:44,549
Yeah, that's what Michael said.
248
00:09:44,551 --> 00:09:46,284
She's pretty crazy about him.
249
00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:47,586
That's sweet.
250
00:09:48,788 --> 00:09:50,288
Mom, you gonna play or what?
251
00:09:50,290 --> 00:09:52,257
Hmm?
Yeah. Sure.
252
00:09:52,259 --> 00:09:54,459
So, if not talking about him
at all is a zero
253
00:09:54,461 --> 00:09:56,561
and talking about Patrick
nonstop is a 10,
254
00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:59,264
would you say
Lulu is at a solid...8?
255
00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:01,099
Mom, why all the questions?
256
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,233
W-wait.
257
00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:03,702
You like him, don't you?
258
00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:04,736
What?!
259
00:10:04,738 --> 00:10:06,204
No! No.
260
00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:08,073
I'm just making small talk
while we play video games.
261
00:10:08,075 --> 00:10:09,641
Uh-huh.
262
00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:10,775
Right.
263
00:10:13,079 --> 00:10:15,413
His name is Patrick Wilson.
Mm-hmm.
264
00:10:15,415 --> 00:10:16,781
He is from Chicago.
265
00:10:16,783 --> 00:10:18,550
His favorite game is "Asteroids."
266
00:10:18,552 --> 00:10:19,584
Mm.
267
00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:21,653
And...
He's a pediatrician.
268
00:10:21,655 --> 00:10:24,289
Oh! You had me
at "pediatrician." Mm.
269
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,557
Oh, and he's a bears fan.
270
00:10:25,559 --> 00:10:27,125
Oh. My dead husband
was into bears.
271
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:28,893
Their names were Tony and Marco.
272
00:10:28,895 --> 00:10:30,395
Talking about
the football team, Lulu.
273
00:10:30,397 --> 00:10:32,263
Oh! And that's the game
with the tight pants.
274
00:10:32,265 --> 00:10:33,565
Ohh. Yes.
275
00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:37,669
We've got some bad news
about this Patrick guy.
276
00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:39,504
If that's even his real name.
277
00:10:39,506 --> 00:10:40,772
What are you talking about?
278
00:10:40,774 --> 00:10:43,008
He's a con man, a shady drifter,
279
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:44,442
and a real player.
280
00:10:44,444 --> 00:10:46,344
He preys off single moms,
like you...
281
00:10:46,346 --> 00:10:49,280
leaves them penniless
and heartbroken.
282
00:10:49,282 --> 00:10:51,683
And we're pretty sure
he's a serial killer
283
00:10:51,685 --> 00:10:53,518
known as the westlake strangler.
284
00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:56,087
What are you guys doing?
285
00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:57,789
Nothing.
286
00:10:57,791 --> 00:11:00,859
We are just two sons worried
about our mothers' safety.
287
00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:03,528
Really?
Are you two jealous?
288
00:11:03,530 --> 00:11:04,763
No!
289
00:11:04,765 --> 00:11:05,930
He is.
290
00:11:05,932 --> 00:11:07,432
I'm just helping this guy out.
291
00:11:07,434 --> 00:11:09,968
Danny! You're so funny.
He's funny, isn't he?
292
00:11:09,970 --> 00:11:11,703
Well, I do hope
all this bad-boy stuff
293
00:11:11,705 --> 00:11:13,772
you guys are making up
is true, because...
294
00:11:13,774 --> 00:11:17,509
Ooh, I love me a dangerous man.
295
00:11:17,511 --> 00:11:19,010
Dang it!
296
00:11:22,715 --> 00:11:24,449
Who's it from?
297
00:11:24,451 --> 00:11:26,017
The eviscerator.
298
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:28,486
It's not ticking.
299
00:11:28,488 --> 00:11:31,256
What do you say?
Here we go, huh?
300
00:11:36,729 --> 00:11:38,163
Ah, geez.
301
00:11:38,165 --> 00:11:40,231
"Geena & the Cannon
forever."
302
00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:42,000
This is not very good.
303
00:11:42,002 --> 00:11:44,469
You think? I told you
you should not go out with her.
304
00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:45,670
You're very smart.
305
00:11:45,672 --> 00:11:47,972
No, I'll just
have a talk with her,
306
00:11:47,974 --> 00:11:50,975
go somewhere... Public,
307
00:11:50,977 --> 00:11:52,977
and, um...
I'll let her down easy.
308
00:11:52,979 --> 00:11:54,813
And in a way
she won't punish me.
309
00:11:54,815 --> 00:11:56,548
No, I-i-i can't promise,
you know?
310
00:11:56,550 --> 00:11:58,149
I'll do my best.
311
00:11:58,151 --> 00:12:01,286
But we have no idea
what we're dealing with here.
312
00:12:03,989 --> 00:12:05,724
And that's you and me.
313
00:12:05,726 --> 00:12:08,093
I-I painted the beard,
gave him a red hat,
314
00:12:08,095 --> 00:12:12,163
and if you lift up his jacket,
he's got hair on his back.
315
00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:14,232
That's very terrific.
316
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:16,101
Please tell me
it hasn't got a zipper.
317
00:12:16,103 --> 00:12:19,437
Listen, um...
We really have to talk.
318
00:12:19,439 --> 00:12:22,340
Yes, we do! We need to decide
where we're going to register.
319
00:12:22,342 --> 00:12:23,508
How about bellevue?
320
00:12:23,510 --> 00:12:25,110
Well, look, um...
In my heart,
321
00:12:25,112 --> 00:12:27,011
I really think
you're one of the nice...
322
00:12:27,013 --> 00:12:28,680
a really wonderful,
wonderful la...
323
00:12:28,682 --> 00:12:30,515
let me stop you right now.
324
00:12:32,017 --> 00:12:34,753
I would be very careful choosing
my next words if I were you.
325
00:12:34,755 --> 00:12:37,355
That spirited grandson of yours
is teetering
326
00:12:37,357 --> 00:12:39,090
between an "A" and a "B"
this semester,
327
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:42,627
and... We wouldn't want him
to ruin his chances
328
00:12:42,629 --> 00:12:44,195
for honor roll, now, would we?
329
00:12:44,197 --> 00:12:46,765
Now give me a kiss.
330
00:12:49,201 --> 00:12:50,802
No, not here.
331
00:12:50,804 --> 00:12:52,270
Where?
332
00:12:56,142 --> 00:12:57,809
How come you hot ones
are so crazy?
333
00:12:58,945 --> 00:13:00,712
Talk about... Baseball.
334
00:13:00,714 --> 00:13:02,413
Talk about anything
sports-related.
335
00:13:02,415 --> 00:13:03,948
Right.
He's a dude.
336
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,317
Well, there was that game...
the game was on yesterday.
337
00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:07,318
Hi, ladies.
338
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:08,820
Oh, hi! Hello.
Hi.
339
00:13:08,822 --> 00:13:10,155
You look ready
to dominate the balloon toss.
340
00:13:10,157 --> 00:13:11,322
Oh, absolutely.
341
00:13:11,324 --> 00:13:12,824
Just like
the Florida manatees did
342
00:13:12,826 --> 00:13:14,459
in yesterday's football parade.
343
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:16,728
"Game."
She means "game."
344
00:13:16,730 --> 00:13:18,630
Do I?
Yes. Yes, you do.
345
00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:20,331
Wow.
Look at this guy.
346
00:13:20,333 --> 00:13:22,267
We're totally screwed.
347
00:13:22,269 --> 00:13:23,802
Such a poseur.
348
00:13:23,804 --> 00:13:25,937
Where did he even come from,
anyways?
349
00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:27,138
What's up, brah?
350
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:29,440
Did you just say...
"Brah"?
351
00:13:29,442 --> 00:13:30,842
Ignore him.
352
00:13:30,844 --> 00:13:32,477
I would never do that.
353
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,812
Yeah, you can't turn your back
on family, Terry.
354
00:13:33,814 --> 00:13:35,313
Wait.
355
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:36,981
He's your brah?
Like, your brah brah?
356
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:38,483
Well, we're half-brahs...
same ma...
357
00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:39,717
Different pa.
358
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,821
I'm not wearing
a "brah."
359
00:13:42,823 --> 00:13:44,856
Oh, yah.
360
00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:48,493
Sorry. Just wanted to get in
on your American fun.
361
00:13:57,036 --> 00:13:59,938
You know, I think
him being dick's half-brother
362
00:13:59,940 --> 00:14:02,841
has actually made him
even more attractive to me.
363
00:14:02,843 --> 00:14:04,876
I mean, he could have
turned out like that,
364
00:14:04,878 --> 00:14:07,178
but instead,
he's... That.
365
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,447
I can't believe
they're from the same gene pool.
366
00:14:09,449 --> 00:14:10,949
Mm.
367
00:14:10,951 --> 00:14:12,817
I hope to be swimming
in at least half of that pool
368
00:14:12,819 --> 00:14:14,185
by noon.
369
00:14:14,187 --> 00:14:15,720
Oh, we are gonna get you
in the deep end...
370
00:14:15,722 --> 00:14:18,356
not the shallow, vapid end.
371
00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:20,391
Look, man, just 'cause
you're my half-brother
372
00:14:20,393 --> 00:14:22,460
doesn't mean I'm gonna
take it easy on you.
373
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:24,963
I'm a pediatrician.
Kids' games are my forte.
374
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,298
Oh, I'm not worried.
Look how limber I've gotten.
375
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:29,300
Check this out.
376
00:14:29,302 --> 00:14:30,969
Look at that.
377
00:14:30,971 --> 00:14:33,071
And balloon toss... joom, joom!
Joom, joom, joom, joom!
378
00:14:33,073 --> 00:14:36,474
I'm there...
24/7, all day.
379
00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:38,343
You're still the strangest
person I've ever known.
380
00:14:38,345 --> 00:14:39,344
I missed you, man.
381
00:14:39,346 --> 00:14:40,812
I missed you, too, man.
382
00:14:40,814 --> 00:14:43,648
But now...
I got to kick your ass.
383
00:14:43,650 --> 00:14:44,849
Bring it, brah.
384
00:14:44,851 --> 00:14:46,651
Oh, I will, brah.
385
00:14:46,653 --> 00:14:48,553
All right, you didn't do so well
at the sports talk,
386
00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:50,221
so let's dance
with the one that brought you.
387
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:52,824
Unbutton that blouse a little
and unleash the krakens.
388
00:14:52,826 --> 00:14:54,325
Ohh, yes, darling.
389
00:14:54,327 --> 00:14:55,860
I am much more comfortable
with that approach.
390
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:57,095
Perfect.
Mm.
391
00:14:57,097 --> 00:14:58,563
Hey, Patrick.
392
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,231
It, uh, looks like you could use
393
00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:02,267
another person
for your balloon-toss team.
394
00:15:02,269 --> 00:15:04,068
You know, you should pick Lulu.
395
00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:05,737
She is everything you'd want
in a partner.
396
00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:09,107
Oh!
397
00:15:09,109 --> 00:15:10,541
See, that's Lulu's
psych-out move.
398
00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:12,443
Yeah, she likes
to lull the other team
399
00:15:12,445 --> 00:15:14,045
into a false sense of security.
400
00:15:14,047 --> 00:15:15,713
How about it, Lulu?
You want to be on my team?
401
00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:17,048
Yes.
402
00:15:17,050 --> 00:15:20,051
I would love
to team up with you.
403
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:21,719
Awesome.
I'll see you out there.
404
00:15:21,721 --> 00:15:23,254
Okay.
405
00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:26,557
You got him! You guys are
gonna be on the same team!
406
00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:27,992
Oh, my gosh!
It's like a date!
407
00:15:33,632 --> 00:15:35,867
Nothing impresses a man
more than a woman
408
00:15:35,869 --> 00:15:38,202
who can walk 50 yards
with an egg on a spoon.
409
00:15:38,204 --> 00:15:39,737
Hmm.
Now, open up.
410
00:15:39,739 --> 00:15:40,972
Oh! My veneers!
411
00:15:40,974 --> 00:15:42,407
Oh, Lulu, focus!
412
00:15:42,409 --> 00:15:45,043
Wow. Your mom's actually
going through with this.
413
00:15:45,045 --> 00:15:47,845
She must really like this guy.
414
00:15:48,714 --> 00:15:50,148
On your mark, get set, go!
415
00:15:54,153 --> 00:15:55,553
Run!
No, no, no.
416
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:56,955
As soon as I move,
this is gonna fall.
417
00:15:56,957 --> 00:15:58,556
I've got way too much
natural shimmy, darling.
418
00:15:58,558 --> 00:15:59,891
You do it.
419
00:15:59,893 --> 00:16:01,626
Your teeth are just...
What they are.
420
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,294
Now, go. Go, go, go! Go on!
Catch up! Go on, darling!
421
00:16:08,500 --> 00:16:10,535
Where's the bar?
422
00:16:18,944 --> 00:16:21,579
Hey, nice egg-work!
Thanks.
423
00:16:21,581 --> 00:16:22,480
Where's Lulu?
424
00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:23,748
Oh, she had to bow out.
425
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:25,917
Yeah, she had to
save a... Cat...
426
00:16:25,919 --> 00:16:27,185
From a dog...
Over there.
427
00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:28,653
Natural enemies.
428
00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:30,154
You know, you'd think by now,
they would...
429
00:16:30,756 --> 00:16:32,190
You get it.
Okay.
430
00:16:32,192 --> 00:16:33,524
So, I guess we're a team now.
431
00:16:33,526 --> 00:16:34,692
Yeah.
432
00:16:34,694 --> 00:16:36,327
Yeah, don't slow me down, doc.
433
00:16:38,464 --> 00:16:41,366
Looks like your mom
has hearts in her eyes now.
434
00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:43,167
Good news for me.
435
00:16:44,703 --> 00:16:46,371
Hey, bud.
436
00:16:46,373 --> 00:16:48,673
Cannon,
what is that on your face?
437
00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:49,841
It's a monarch.
438
00:16:49,843 --> 00:16:51,275
There were a couple of hot mamas
439
00:16:51,277 --> 00:16:53,011
in the, uh, face-painting booth
over there.
440
00:16:53,013 --> 00:16:55,480
Uh, uh, Cannon, look,
you should not be here, okay?
441
00:16:55,482 --> 00:16:57,348
Miss Crosby...
she's running around.
442
00:16:57,350 --> 00:16:58,850
She's gonna find you.
443
00:16:58,852 --> 00:17:00,885
Actually, that's good,
because I'm here to talk to her.
444
00:17:00,887 --> 00:17:02,620
I got to put an end
to this nonsense.
445
00:17:02,622 --> 00:17:04,655
Okay, I'm sorry...
i cannot take you seriously
446
00:17:04,657 --> 00:17:06,524
with this butterfly
on your face.
447
00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:08,526
It's a monarch.
448
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,294
You ready to lose?
449
00:17:10,296 --> 00:17:12,030
My dad was a lot stronger
than your dad, so we'll see.
450
00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:13,631
Oh, you think so?
451
00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:15,800
Doesn't matter. You're going down, bro.
Wrong!
452
00:17:15,802 --> 00:17:16,968
We got this.
453
00:17:16,970 --> 00:17:18,836
Oh, yeah.
I'm small, but feisty.
454
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:19,904
I've noticed.
455
00:17:20,974 --> 00:17:22,573
Pull! Pull!
456
00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:24,242
No! No!
457
00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:26,411
Mom, pull!
Come on! Go!
458
00:17:26,413 --> 00:17:29,013
Danny, I'd like a word with you.
459
00:17:29,015 --> 00:17:30,882
Uh-oh.
"Uh-oh" is right.
460
00:17:30,884 --> 00:17:32,350
Make sure your grandfather knows
461
00:17:32,352 --> 00:17:33,918
that if he breaks up with me,
462
00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:36,854
you can expect a world of pain.
463
00:17:36,856 --> 00:17:38,923
Every test you take,
every move you make,
464
00:17:38,925 --> 00:17:40,091
I'll be failing you.
465
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:41,993
I'll be failing you.
466
00:17:41,995 --> 00:17:43,428
Look, miss Crosby,
467
00:17:43,430 --> 00:17:45,363
please just stay away
from my granddad, all right?
468
00:17:45,365 --> 00:17:47,031
You two are not
meant to be together,
469
00:17:47,033 --> 00:17:48,266
and there's no spark.
470
00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:50,101
I am not getting any younger,
471
00:17:50,103 --> 00:17:53,204
and I will not... will not...
spend my golden years by myself,
472
00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:55,573
trying to find happiness
in ceramics.
473
00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:56,541
Are we clear?
474
00:17:56,543 --> 00:17:58,609
Hey.
Here, take this.
475
00:17:58,611 --> 00:18:00,812
Go ahead. Take it.
I paid for it.
476
00:18:02,214 --> 00:18:03,714
Even if you two get together,
477
00:18:03,716 --> 00:18:05,950
I don't think you'll have
a very healthy relationship.
478
00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:07,952
I...Don't... Care!
479
00:18:07,954 --> 00:18:09,854
What the heck?!
480
00:18:09,856 --> 00:18:10,922
Where are you going?!
481
00:18:10,924 --> 00:18:12,290
My kid!
482
00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:13,424
Hey...
teacher!
483
00:18:14,193 --> 00:18:15,293
Leave that kid alone.
484
00:18:15,295 --> 00:18:17,028
Danny, what's going on here?
485
00:18:17,030 --> 00:18:18,930
Oh, she...
she threatened to fail me
486
00:18:18,932 --> 00:18:20,798
if the Cannon
doesn't keep seeing her.
487
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:22,033
She's crazy, mom.
488
00:18:22,035 --> 00:18:23,401
Check that.
489
00:18:23,403 --> 00:18:24,869
All right, now,
you listen to me, fruitcake.
490
00:18:24,871 --> 00:18:26,437
You get in my son's face again,
491
00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:28,072
you're gonna have a problem
with me, okay?
492
00:18:28,074 --> 00:18:29,607
'Cause as crazy
as you think you are,
493
00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:31,075
you have not met the gannons.
494
00:18:31,077 --> 00:18:33,478
She is right.
We out-crazy everyone.
495
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,480
I mean, my granddad has
a butterfly on his cheek.
496
00:18:35,482 --> 00:18:36,481
Look at that.
497
00:18:36,483 --> 00:18:37,548
It's a monarch.
498
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,283
Stay away from me,
499
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:42,887
and more importantly,
stay away from my grandson.
500
00:18:42,889 --> 00:18:44,155
Yeah.
501
00:18:44,157 --> 00:18:45,389
You so much as look at him
the wrong way,
502
00:18:45,391 --> 00:18:46,557
I'm coming after you.
503
00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:49,060
See it in the eyes?
See it?
504
00:18:49,062 --> 00:18:50,094
I will end you.
505
00:18:50,096 --> 00:18:51,295
Now say you're sorry.
506
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:53,097
Say it!
507
00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:57,235
I am... Terribly sorry.
508
00:18:57,237 --> 00:18:58,936
Yes!
509
00:18:58,938 --> 00:19:00,905
Guys, look, I was worried
510
00:19:00,907 --> 00:19:04,242
that people would
come between us and our family,
511
00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:05,610
but after that,
512
00:19:05,612 --> 00:19:08,012
I'm positive that's not
gonna happen ever again.
513
00:19:08,014 --> 00:19:09,413
I love you guys.
514
00:19:09,415 --> 00:19:11,682
Aww.
I love you, too, bud.
515
00:19:15,687 --> 00:19:17,989
Come on, Patrick!
That's it, darling!
516
00:19:17,991 --> 00:19:19,524
Pull! Pull!
517
00:19:19,526 --> 00:19:21,459
Isn't he lovely, darling?
Look at him.
518
00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:23,361
He is, mom.
519
00:19:23,363 --> 00:19:25,596
I think you guys
would make a great couple.
520
00:19:25,598 --> 00:19:26,831
Really?
Mm-hmm.
521
00:19:26,833 --> 00:19:28,299
Oh, thank you, darling.
522
00:19:28,301 --> 00:19:29,934
Ohh.
523
00:19:29,936 --> 00:19:32,937
Come on, Patrick, darling!
You've got this!
524
00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:34,805
Come on, Patrick!
Yank it!
525
00:19:36,209 --> 00:19:37,875
Come on!
526
00:19:40,612 --> 00:19:43,347
Come on! Go!
527
00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:49,086
Aaaah!
528
00:19:53,726 --> 00:19:55,560
Yeah!
529
00:19:55,562 --> 00:19:56,894
Yeah!
530
00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:58,696
Nice job!
Fun day.
531
00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:00,164
It was a fun day.
532
00:20:00,166 --> 00:20:02,633
It's good
to have you back, brah.
533
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:06,971
Hey, doc.
534
00:20:06,973 --> 00:20:08,406
Walk with me.
535
00:20:08,408 --> 00:20:10,675
Okay.
What's on your mind?
536
00:20:10,677 --> 00:20:12,410
You'll see.
537
00:20:14,146 --> 00:20:15,046
Oh!
538
00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:21,452
Oh!
Well done, darling.
539
00:20:29,761 --> 00:20:30,995
Well done, darling.
Well done.
540
00:20:30,997 --> 00:20:32,897
I'm gonna name it
"Patrick."
541
00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:34,265
Okay.
542
00:20:39,738 --> 00:20:40,671
Hi, Terry.
543
00:20:40,673 --> 00:20:42,373
Um, I just wanted to say
544
00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:44,575
thank you so, so much for
bringing Patrick and I together.
545
00:20:44,577 --> 00:20:46,177
You're a true friend, darling.
546
00:20:46,179 --> 00:20:48,412
Oh, Lulu, you guys
are gonna be so happy together.
547
00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:51,249
Yes, and I have a great idea.
548
00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:53,517
I'd love to buy you dinner
tonight...
549
00:20:53,519 --> 00:20:55,686
you know, just to say
"thank you" and to celebrate.
550
00:20:55,688 --> 00:20:57,355
That sounds perfect.
551
00:20:57,357 --> 00:20:58,856
Wonderful.
552
00:20:58,858 --> 00:21:00,358
Well, I'll see you
at the sidecar at 8:00?
553
00:21:00,360 --> 00:21:02,126
Great.
554
00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:03,294
Great.
555
00:21:11,203 --> 00:21:14,272
There you go, ma'am.
Enjoy.
556
00:21:16,642 --> 00:21:17,908
What are you doing here?
557
00:21:17,910 --> 00:21:19,710
I was supposed to meet Lulu.
558
00:21:19,712 --> 00:21:21,812
She told me the same thing.
559
00:21:29,755 --> 00:21:31,289
So, what now?
38255
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof