Original subtitles

Thanks a lot. We're on our way.

Oh.

Where are you going?

Well, what do you think, honey? North? We've done north. How about west?

That's an idea.

But let's not lock ourselves in. You're right, honey. You mean you haven't made

any plans?

Oh, we never do. We just get in the car and go wherever.

I'm glad I don't carpool with you guys.

Well, that sounds like fun, not having any plans, just winging it, being Frieza

Bird.

Funny, even birds pick a direction.

You'll have to excuse my husband.

When he gets up in the morning, he checks off, got up.

Well, you know, there isn't anything wrong with making plans. I mean, what if

you drove to a city and when you got there, all the hotels had been booked?

We'd probably end up in a place like this.

Well, you wouldn't want that to happen again.

Why don't I call ahead and make some reservations? Oh, no, thanks. Thanks,

anyway. We're fine.

We had a great time.

But at least take a map.

Crazy, reckless kids.

Dick, they're just being spontaneous. You could learn something from them.

Joanna, I'm as spontaneous as the next guy.

I've gone north.

Yeah, but never without your pals, Rand and McNally.

Hi, there's nothing wrong with planning these things out.

I mean, I prefer using a travel agent to flinging darts at a man.

Boring. Careful.

Dick, tell me the last time that you went to bed without having all your

laid out for the next day, or the last time you got something at the grocery

store that wasn't on your list.

Joanna, you can't compare responsible shopping with driving hell -bent through

Vermont.

Just face it. If you're not spontaneous, then you never will be.

Oh, really?

That enough?

Michael, Stephanie, what happened?

Fuzzy? The Z.

The Z was in a tiny accident.

Tiny? My Z now looks like a W.

We had just dropped my car off for servicing, and we were driving home, and

usual, Michael couldn't take his eyes off me.

And he smashed into a mailbox.

It was Michael's fault. I mean, he did pick this outfit.

This is the first accident I've ever caused.

Well, that I know of, anyway.

Michael, you should be grateful that you and Stephanie are okay and only the car

is damaged.

Boy, Dick, it's a good thing Bambi had Thumper to comfort him and not you.

Come on, let's take a look at it. Dick, it's hideous.

It looks...

into Quebec.

We are?

When did we decide this?

Just now.

Call it a whim.

Call it a lark.

Call it spontaneous.

Dick, are you serious?

No, I thought about what you said and you were right. I could be a little

looser. Well, this is great. How'd you come up with Quebec?

Tossed a dot at a map. How else?

Oh, honey.

Honey, I am so proud of you. This is really great.

Well, it isn't that big a deal.

Oh, I've got it. Let's go to Niagara Falls.

No.

Quebec.

They even speak a different language up there.

It'll be nuts.

Wait, wait, wait. What about California? Yeah, let's get on a plane. Honey,

honey, the dart has been cast.

We'll just get in the car and go to Quebec. Well, we could, but we've been

there. Yeah, but never like this. You know, not all of a sudden.

And besides, you know, it's north.

Yeah, but, Dick, I mean, why get stuck in one place? I mean, as long as we're

doing this without any plans, then that is what we're doing, right?

Right.

Dick, why are you so set on Quebec?

Because that's, um... That's kind of, uh... That's kind of... kind of

what the reservations are.

The what? The reservations are.

Honey, I mean, there's nothing wrong with making reservations for a hotel,

know, just to be absolutely sure.

Oh, Dick, about this itinerary, I can't read where you're going to be tomorrow

at 2 .30.

Michael! Who is she? Oh, she's doing fine.

You can tell me.

wax them, you polish them, you change their oil, and then something like this

happens. She's going to be okay.

Well, we do have a specialist, Arnie. He's supposed to be the best fender and

chrome man in the business.

I'm sure he is. I wanted to stay, but they said they could work faster if they

didn't have to keep prying me off the hood.

Michael, you know I'm sorry about your Z, but boy, is that your loner out

Michael, did you get your new car?

It's just temporary.

It sits out there.

Where?

Over by the trash cans.

The only thing over there is a big, red, ugly truck.

Ew!

Steph, that's all they had.

Oh. Some guys have all the luck. I had to get a loaner once. They made me take

little foreign car.

Couldn't haul a thing in it.

Michael, do you mind if I go out and take a closer look? Oh, go ahead. Oh,

You can just take your head in for servicing.

When are you getting the Z back? We have the Dartmouth dance, the fashion show,

our open tea roof drive through town, and our new sweaters.

Steph, don't worry. The Z is going under the torch this afternoon.

Oh, why couldn't it have been me?

Joanna?

Come on.

Come on, we're going on a trip.

Who is it?

It's me, come on.

Dick, it's either the middle of the night or my eyes are still closed.

way, I'm not moving.

Come on, Joanna.

Where are we going? I don't know.

When are we coming back? I don't know.

Dick, if you let me sleep... I'll let you make all sorts of reservations in

morning. Joanna, you wanted me to be spontaneous.

You got it.

Come on, we'll go with the clothes on our backs.

We're in pajamas.

Oh, all right.

Okay, we'll go with the clothes on our backs in a few minutes.

And I won't even wear the clothes that I laid out. I'll wear...

the clothes I laid out.

And Dick, this time, no reservations?

Only if we cross through Navajo territory.

Oh, honey, when you talk like that... We'll leave George and Stephanie a note,

but we won't sign it.

Okay. Now, what we've got to do here is look at this as an adventure.

For the last 15 hours, we changed the tire, we've been rained on, we've been

stuck in mud, and we've put 300 miles on the car without moving an inch.

And then we ran out of gas.

Dick, I know all of this. Please let me go on, Joanna. I like reliving it.

And then that road.

Oh, why don't we see where this leads?

Well, this is where it leads, Joanna.

Hotel Hell.

I can't believe I let you talk me into this.

Dick, I did not talk you into this. This was your idea.

I never even thought of being spontaneous until you mentioned it.

Well, we're here now.

Somewhere in New Hampshire.

Let's just make the best of it.

Besides, I'm not having a bad time.

Yes, you are.

This is a bad time, Joanne.

This is the standard by which all other bad times...

stay in the sleazebag motel.

Dick, we're tired.

We're mud -caked.

How far is the next motel?

Ten miles.

I'm game to push. How about you?

No way.

What happened to Miss Positive's sunshine face?

She wants a shower, she wants a bed, and she wants them now.

All right, we'll take a room.

You want it for the full hour?

all we wanted for the full night.

Sure.

Look, we're married. We just want a place to sleep.

Yeah, right.

Do you have a reservation?

For this?

Phil, didn't you ever pick up and go willy -nilly?

You know, with no plans, just hit the road free as a bird?

What are you, some kind of beatnik?

No. Seems crazy driving around in the middle of the night without an

Look, we just want a room for the night. Or in your language, eight one hours.

We're full.

What? You don't exactly look like you're up to the level of my usual

clientele.

I think I know what's going on here.

Do you have any money?

Here, why don't you charge yourself a nice bribe?

I'm thinking maybe the bed came first.

Honey, do you think they let whales stay here?

Probably. If they have reservations.

Well, Miss, aren't we having fun this back?

Come on, honey. We're inside. We're warm.

We got a nice big bed, and I think the police left.

Yeah, and the guy they took with them has nicer lodgings than we do tonight.

Come on, Dick. Just try and relax.

What I need is a high -speed drill in my molar and I can really kick back.

Hope the doorknob works in the morning.

Let's go to sleep fast.

Hi, I'm Roy.

Phil said we have to share.

won't have the Z.

What? Well, there were some complications. Don't worry. She's going

One of the retractable headlights, it's sticking.

But with your car in the next bay, it looks like they're flirting.

So what are we going to the dance in?

Guess what this starts.

You still have that? It won't be so bad going in big red.

Michael, you named it.

It's dark. I got rid of the bird. app, and when was the last time we tuned into

AM radio?

Oh, Micah, I refuse to ride in any vehicle I have to step up into.

Okay, Steph, I guess we just won't go.

I guess we won't make our grand entrance or our grand exit.

And we won't be doing this.

Oh, Micah.

You know how much better it is when people are watching.

It's not what you drive. It's what you wear.

Michael, do you really believe that? You bet.

the lobby.

Does this mean you guys won't be going out tonight?

Then you won't be needing Big Red?

You want to take a first spin, George?

You mean it?

Just get it away from here.

Hey, wait a minute.

Gee, thanks, Michael.

When I get back, I'll let you know what I hauled.

Sorry, it's a bad dream.

Maybe I'll try to go back to it.

We should have just stayed in the motel room.

Yeah, and waited for Roy to come back and join us? No thanks.

He fixed the TV set, Dick.

I don't care.

Well, I still don't know why you had to throw his duffel bag out the window.

It was a spontaneous decision.

I thought that's what this trip was all about.

Dick, stop it now.

I'm tired of hearing you complain. You haven't said one good thing about this

whole trip.

All right.

Most of it is behind us.

Dick.

Admit it. We would have been better off if we had planned this trip like we

usually do.

In fact, I...

I'm making some plans right now, and I'm writing them down.

A, get gas.

B, go home.

C, report Phil to some commission.

Okay, Dick, being spontaneous didn't work out this time, but I mean, it can

great.

I'm really never going to find out, because this is my last madcap hurrah.

It's incredible.

It's beautiful.

I've never seen that color.

It's not really red.

It's not really orange. It's... orange.

Now admit it, honey.

You wouldn't have planned on getting up at 5 a .m. to see this, would you?

Probably not.

Bob will be right back on Newhart, next on Nick at Night. Try and stop me.