All language subtitles for Newhart s08e11 Jumpin George

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:53,480 Stephanie, are those headphones? 2 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:56,000 Actually, they're womb phones. 3 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:00,320 Womb phones? 4 00:01:01,340 --> 00:01:06,240 Why? See, yesterday there was this German psychologist on that gab show, 5 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:07,240 Female. 6 00:01:07,960 --> 00:01:09,440 I taped it by accident. 7 00:01:10,180 --> 00:01:13,240 Like you accidentally tape the bold and the beautiful every day? 8 00:01:14,820 --> 00:01:16,760 I only watch it for the bold stuff. 9 00:01:18,660 --> 00:01:23,370 Anyway, this... A German expert said that children in the womb, or womb 10 00:01:23,390 --> 00:01:27,750 can actually hear sounds before they're born. 11 00:01:27,950 --> 00:01:31,870 And what are the young kids listening to these days? 12 00:01:33,490 --> 00:01:36,750 Oh, Mother Goose and that sesame seed stuff. 13 00:01:38,330 --> 00:01:40,070 But not our little biddle. 14 00:01:42,470 --> 00:01:44,970 The Art of the Deal by Donald Trump. 15 00:01:46,950 --> 00:01:48,770 Today's tykes are tomorrow's tycoons. 16 00:01:51,210 --> 00:01:53,510 Stephanie, I think you're putting too much pressure on the baby. 17 00:01:54,230 --> 00:01:56,110 You should feel what it's doing to my bladder. 18 00:01:59,930 --> 00:02:01,530 Down. This bad boy better blow. 19 00:02:02,370 --> 00:02:05,590 Cans on the bottom, eggs on top. Cans on the bottom, eggs on top. 20 00:02:07,150 --> 00:02:08,930 Hardest working grocery clerk in Vermont. 21 00:02:09,610 --> 00:02:11,650 Cans on the bottom, eggs on top. 22 00:02:12,730 --> 00:02:13,750 Cans on the bottom. 23 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:17,099 What's on top? 24 00:02:17,100 --> 00:02:18,100 Eggs. Right. 25 00:02:19,340 --> 00:02:20,600 Restless night, George? 26 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,220 Oh, I've been tossing and turning a lot lately. 27 00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:28,080 It's this recurring nightmare I keep having over and over and over again. 28 00:02:28,920 --> 00:02:32,200 Yeah, recurring nightmares are better, you know, when you only have them, like, 29 00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:33,200 once. 30 00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:35,080 What's it about? 31 00:02:35,260 --> 00:02:40,500 Well, I'm standing on this really high cliff, surrounded by a bluish fog, just 32 00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:44,320 like in those rock videos, only I'm not wearing spandex pants. 33 00:02:46,890 --> 00:02:47,890 That would be a nightmare. 34 00:02:49,950 --> 00:02:55,770 A glittery figure is standing behind me, whispering, jump, George, jump. 35 00:02:56,030 --> 00:03:01,130 And just as I turn to see who it is, I'm pushed off the cliff into the unknown. 36 00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:06,550 I start falling, and just when I'm about to hit the ground, boing, I wake up. 37 00:03:07,830 --> 00:03:10,370 Well, you know, that's because if you hit the ground, you'd die. 38 00:03:11,870 --> 00:03:16,150 And they say, you know, if you die in your dreams, that you're really dying. 39 00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:17,680 I didn't know that. 40 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,120 Well, you know, it's just what they say. 41 00:03:20,420 --> 00:03:22,560 Well, they wouldn't say it if they didn't mean it. 42 00:03:24,740 --> 00:03:28,100 George, trust me. You don't have to worry about dying in your sleep. 43 00:03:28,300 --> 00:03:31,220 You bet I don't, because I'm never going to sleep again. 44 00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:43,280 Anybody want coffee? 45 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:45,640 It's caffeinated. 46 00:03:47,800 --> 00:03:52,800 I think I'll pass, George. Normally, I love a big jolt of caffeine, you know, 47 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:54,260 just before bedtime. 48 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:58,500 You're not really planning to stay up forever. 49 00:03:58,800 --> 00:03:59,659 Why not? 50 00:03:59,660 --> 00:04:01,880 Maybe man doesn't really need sleep. 51 00:04:03,700 --> 00:04:06,640 Probably just a lazy habit that he's gotten used to. 52 00:04:08,020 --> 00:04:10,100 I knew you'd mock me. 53 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,900 George Utley to stay awake for the rest of life. 54 00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:19,779 Dick Loudon expected to mock him. 55 00:04:22,540 --> 00:04:24,680 The new editor is really on top of things. 56 00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:28,740 Nice old photo of you with your watermelon. 57 00:04:29,260 --> 00:04:30,260 Oh, thanks. 58 00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:32,780 That was taken the night of my senior prom. 59 00:04:35,320 --> 00:04:36,920 I tried to get a date. 60 00:04:40,680 --> 00:04:42,540 Is this a schedule? 61 00:04:43,070 --> 00:04:46,390 Yeah. Some of my pals are taking turns coming over to keep me awake. 62 00:04:47,550 --> 00:04:50,130 You have me down for the 5 a .m. shift. 63 00:04:52,590 --> 00:04:54,150 Well, good night, George. I'm off to bed. 64 00:04:54,350 --> 00:04:55,350 Sweet. 65 00:04:56,030 --> 00:04:57,050 Never mind. 66 00:05:02,350 --> 00:05:03,350 Hi. 67 00:05:08,290 --> 00:05:12,000 I'm Larry. This is my brother, Daryl. And this is my other brother, Daryl. 68 00:05:12,140 --> 00:05:13,560 my first shift is here. 69 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:19,000 We come bearing gifts, not unlike three wise men on another special night. 70 00:05:20,360 --> 00:05:25,360 I gather you bring gold, frankincense, and myrrh? 71 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:29,340 Oh, Dick, you gather incorrectly yet again. 72 00:05:29,780 --> 00:05:32,500 Though you did happen to name two of our accountants. 73 00:05:40,490 --> 00:05:42,670 Gold and myrrh? No, frank and incense. 74 00:05:47,130 --> 00:05:52,270 A thermos of warm milk, your favorite bedtime stories, and Burl Ives' 75 00:05:52,270 --> 00:05:53,270 album. 76 00:05:54,210 --> 00:05:57,150 I thought the object was to keep George awake. 77 00:05:57,470 --> 00:05:58,770 That's where these come in. 78 00:05:59,850 --> 00:06:01,490 Nice, sharp knitting needles. 79 00:06:03,730 --> 00:06:07,830 George, listen, I hate to tell you this. I know... 80 00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:12,240 You know, you're scared, but... I mean, you've got to sleep. 81 00:06:12,820 --> 00:06:13,820 Ah! 82 00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:21,920 You made your point, and now Daryl has made his. 83 00:06:24,680 --> 00:06:26,420 Guess I can sleep on my stomach. 84 00:06:47,359 --> 00:06:50,720 It looks like your brothers have had enough excitement for one evening. 85 00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:53,260 They've never been once for small talk. 86 00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:59,320 That's why they continually refuse to attend Mary and Swifty Lazar's post 87 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:00,400 party at Spago's. 88 00:07:05,520 --> 00:07:10,240 You know, Larry, we've known each other a long time. 89 00:07:10,460 --> 00:07:12,560 I'll bet we have a lot in common. 90 00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:13,759 Like what? 91 00:07:13,760 --> 00:07:15,500 Well, we both wear hats. 92 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:17,840 Hey, you're right. 93 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:19,240 Want to switch? 94 00:07:19,660 --> 00:07:20,660 Okay. 95 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:33,000 Want to switch back? 96 00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:34,240 Okay. 97 00:07:45,580 --> 00:07:48,780 Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop. 98 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:56,140 Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop. 99 00:07:56,860 --> 00:07:57,860 Morning, Dick. 100 00:07:58,220 --> 00:08:01,220 You remember Miss Goddard, the town librarian? 101 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:06,060 Hop aboard. There's always room for another cute boy, Bunny. 102 00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:08,900 Mr. Rosnock, circus with cues? 103 00:08:09,300 --> 00:08:10,820 Touch my hips and die. 104 00:08:16,110 --> 00:08:17,110 Not anymore, George. 105 00:08:18,030 --> 00:08:20,230 Hey, you're early for your shift. 106 00:08:20,470 --> 00:08:22,230 This is bunny hopping time. 107 00:08:22,690 --> 00:08:25,230 George, the 50s were bunny hopping time. 108 00:08:25,530 --> 00:08:30,430 4 a .m. is... It's sleeping time. 109 00:08:30,770 --> 00:08:32,870 It's guys like you who kill the hustle. 110 00:08:34,530 --> 00:08:37,850 Why don't you take this hop -a -thon back to your place? 111 00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:39,289 And wake my elk? 112 00:08:41,549 --> 00:08:43,450 You keep an elk in your apartment? 113 00:08:43,750 --> 00:08:44,910 I've got two bedrooms. 114 00:08:47,680 --> 00:08:49,140 Well, then, you got the room. 115 00:08:50,300 --> 00:08:53,600 George, your bunny hopping is waking up the entire inn. 116 00:08:58,040 --> 00:09:00,940 Larry and the guys don't mind the noise. 117 00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:07,920 They've been... Larry says they chase 118 00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:09,140 cars in their sleep. 119 00:09:12,380 --> 00:09:13,860 I've seen them do it awake. 120 00:09:15,780 --> 00:09:18,600 Get on the top, boys. Time for another bunny hop sandwich. 121 00:09:19,540 --> 00:09:20,980 No, no sandwich. 122 00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:25,720 Everyone out of here and go to sleep. 123 00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:29,980 If George sleeps, he dreams. If he dreams, he dies. 124 00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:32,680 Is that what you want, Loudon? 125 00:09:33,900 --> 00:09:37,660 Miss Goddard, you're an educated woman. Tell George it's just an old wives' 126 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:38,800 tale. 127 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:40,880 Oh, George, I don't want you... 128 00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:49,340 It's moments like these that make me wish God had given me emotions. 129 00:09:52,580 --> 00:09:55,840 It's moments like these that make me question this town's sanity. 130 00:09:56,740 --> 00:10:03,200 If I have to die, I want to die a hero's death, like fixing a TV antenna in the 131 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:04,200 middle of a thunderstorm. 132 00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:08,740 Not like some cartoon coyote falling off a cliff. 133 00:10:09,340 --> 00:10:12,480 Pardon me, but Wile E. Coyote never actually dies. 134 00:10:12,700 --> 00:10:16,540 The impact just forces his legs into his head and he walks around all squished 135 00:10:16,540 --> 00:10:17,540 up for a few minutes. 136 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:20,620 Well, I don't want that to happen either. 137 00:10:21,100 --> 00:10:24,620 Well, maybe you could try flapping your arms before you crash like this. 138 00:10:25,540 --> 00:10:26,540 That'll work. 139 00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:30,560 Well, I don't know. My arms aren't as mighty as yours. 140 00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,400 I'd better just stay awake. 141 00:10:33,640 --> 00:10:36,600 Perhaps I could provide some alluring diversions. 142 00:10:37,620 --> 00:10:39,980 Hey, no diversions in my inn. 143 00:10:41,580 --> 00:10:46,680 George, I'm worried about you. I mean, bunny hopping at four in the morning. 144 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:52,220 I think you need professional help. From Arthur Murray? 145 00:10:54,420 --> 00:10:56,180 No, from Dr. Mary Kaiser. 146 00:10:58,570 --> 00:11:02,050 Everybody knows no Utley has ever been to a psychiatrist. 147 00:11:03,010 --> 00:11:08,390 Well, you know, I knew no Utley had ever been to a chiropractor. Do you think I 148 00:11:08,390 --> 00:11:09,450 need a shrink? 149 00:11:09,690 --> 00:11:13,290 I thought you were my friend. Look, George, I'll... I'm not finished. 150 00:11:14,810 --> 00:11:15,810 Or was I? 151 00:11:18,090 --> 00:11:22,370 I guess maybe I was. No, no, there's more. 152 00:11:24,510 --> 00:11:27,170 You may think I'm confused, but... 153 00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:30,220 There are two things I'm absolutely sure of. 154 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:32,620 One is that I don't need therapy. 155 00:11:33,740 --> 00:11:36,620 And what's the other one? I bunny hop or I die. 156 00:12:00,880 --> 00:12:01,880 Right. 157 00:12:02,580 --> 00:12:04,980 That's why I'm checking out at 7 a .m. 158 00:12:05,460 --> 00:12:08,900 I'll hop, hop, hop over to the Ramada and get some sleep. 159 00:12:11,580 --> 00:12:16,800 I wish you'd give us another shot. This really is a very peaceful little inn. 160 00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:28,320 You know, Dick, I can't help noticing this wall doesn't do anything. 161 00:12:29,130 --> 00:12:30,810 They just hold up those pictures. 162 00:12:32,050 --> 00:12:36,990 And the fireplace and the ceiling and the big support beam that supports 163 00:12:36,990 --> 00:12:38,050 everything in the end. 164 00:12:38,270 --> 00:12:40,230 I don't care. I'm taking her down. 165 00:12:40,490 --> 00:12:45,250 George, George, you've been awake for 32 hours. You're tired, very tired. 166 00:12:45,490 --> 00:12:46,710 Give me the salt. 167 00:12:47,010 --> 00:12:48,190 Turn it off for me. 168 00:12:50,910 --> 00:12:55,430 George, why don't you just busy yourself with something else? 169 00:12:55,840 --> 00:12:58,420 Well, there is that leaky gas line in the basement. 170 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,080 I'll get my blowtorch. George! 171 00:13:02,820 --> 00:13:04,860 Why don't you just tinker? 172 00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:06,380 Yeah, I can tinker. 173 00:13:06,580 --> 00:13:08,600 I can tinker better than anyone. 174 00:13:08,940 --> 00:13:10,260 Don't sleep, tinker. 175 00:13:10,660 --> 00:13:12,520 Don't sleep, just tinker. 176 00:13:12,820 --> 00:13:13,820 Tinker! 177 00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:16,120 Morning. 178 00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:18,300 Oh, hi. I was just coming up to wake you. 179 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:25,100 A simple tap on the shoulder would have suffice. 180 00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:32,500 Something wrong? 181 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:36,580 The womb phones double -crossed us. 182 00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:41,080 We thought Trump was teaching our baby how to use strong -arm tactics to wangle 183 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:42,180 other babies out of their millions. 184 00:13:43,580 --> 00:13:45,100 But the tape wasn't playing. 185 00:13:45,380 --> 00:13:47,880 All this time, the recorder was switched to radio. 186 00:13:48,340 --> 00:13:49,340 AM radio. 187 00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:53,900 to a country western station. 188 00:13:56,440 --> 00:13:57,440 Ew. 189 00:13:59,140 --> 00:14:02,240 Oh, God. Right now our child is doing a two -step. 190 00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:07,480 Well, it certainly has wound to dance. 191 00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:13,060 Nice, Dick. A pathetic pun during our moment of crisis. 192 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:16,000 Oh, don't listen to Dick. I don't. 193 00:14:17,580 --> 00:14:19,400 Why don't the two of you go get some breakfast? 194 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:24,020 I suppose a nice bowl of grits would help. 195 00:14:24,380 --> 00:14:28,160 Michael! Did you hear what I said? I said grits! What's happening to me? 196 00:14:29,060 --> 00:14:30,860 It's the demon hayseed inside you. 197 00:14:32,220 --> 00:14:33,220 Oh, Michael! 198 00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:36,200 Please promise me we won't have to move to the Ozarks. 199 00:14:36,860 --> 00:14:38,560 I wish I could, Steph, but I can't. 200 00:14:52,460 --> 00:14:54,660 been bothering you too, George? Oh, no. 201 00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:56,500 I like this wall. 202 00:14:57,140 --> 00:14:58,360 These are just love taps. 203 00:14:59,320 --> 00:15:01,600 What a dick, Dick. 204 00:15:02,820 --> 00:15:06,660 Yeah, all right. I'd better call for an appointment with Dr. 205 00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:07,919 Kaiser. 206 00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:09,460 You want to make one for me too? 207 00:15:17,940 --> 00:15:20,300 The receptionist said that Dr. 208 00:15:20,500 --> 00:15:21,520 Kaiser would be right out. 209 00:15:21,850 --> 00:15:25,750 As soon as she revs up her atomic brain machine. 210 00:15:27,250 --> 00:15:31,030 She doesn't use machines, George. She just talks. 211 00:15:31,490 --> 00:15:33,510 Okay, but she better not get personal. 212 00:15:35,210 --> 00:15:36,770 That's her job, George. 213 00:15:37,430 --> 00:15:39,910 Don't you understand the concept of therapy? 214 00:15:40,550 --> 00:15:46,970 Maybe I don't. Or maybe you're just transferring hostility to avoid 215 00:15:46,970 --> 00:15:48,750 your own feelings of inadequacy. 216 00:15:51,960 --> 00:15:54,700 Hello. You must be George. 217 00:15:55,620 --> 00:15:58,440 It's like she's undressing my mind with her eyes. 218 00:15:59,660 --> 00:16:03,740 And Dick, I haven't seen you since that marriage counseling group last year. 219 00:16:04,780 --> 00:16:06,940 And how is your lovely ex -wife, Joanna? 220 00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:10,920 We're still married. 221 00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:14,340 Lost that bet. 222 00:16:16,300 --> 00:16:20,080 And now, if you don't mind. Oh, right. I'll just, I'll wait. 223 00:16:24,620 --> 00:16:27,660 Outside. Well, then, where shall we start? 224 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:28,980 I don't want to die. 225 00:16:30,660 --> 00:16:31,660 Let's start there. 226 00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:34,500 Would you like to lie down? Okay. 227 00:16:37,220 --> 00:16:40,240 I see your little game. 228 00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:44,440 I lie down, and all my change falls between the cushions. 229 00:16:46,780 --> 00:16:48,300 You found me out, George. 230 00:16:49,620 --> 00:16:51,900 Oh, that ain't gonna happen, lady. 231 00:16:56,520 --> 00:17:03,200 I think what we should do is have you close your eyes, relax, and describe 232 00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:04,359 your dream to me. 233 00:17:04,579 --> 00:17:07,099 Well, I'm standing on this cliff. 234 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:10,579 And you're covered in a hazy sort of bluish fog. 235 00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:12,500 How did you know? 236 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:14,260 I read it in the paper. 237 00:17:16,910 --> 00:17:21,670 And that glittery figure is standing behind you. Uh -huh. And it's about to 238 00:17:21,670 --> 00:17:24,329 me off. Let it, George. Let it. I don't want it to. 239 00:17:24,630 --> 00:17:26,170 Too late. I'm falling. 240 00:17:26,690 --> 00:17:28,210 Falling. Falling. 241 00:17:28,410 --> 00:17:29,410 Falling. George. 242 00:17:29,790 --> 00:17:33,450 Falling. Falling. Can you hear me, George? Falling. 243 00:17:34,370 --> 00:17:35,370 Falling. 244 00:17:37,110 --> 00:17:38,790 George. I'm still falling. 245 00:17:40,030 --> 00:17:41,490 Falling. Falling. 246 00:17:42,350 --> 00:17:43,350 Falling. 247 00:17:43,850 --> 00:17:44,850 Falling. 248 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:50,120 Where am I? 249 00:17:50,580 --> 00:17:52,020 Johnny Cake Pond. 250 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:53,680 Oh, yeah. 251 00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:57,660 And that's Johnny Cake Cliff. You're right. 252 00:17:57,900 --> 00:18:00,140 You see, you didn't die. 253 00:18:00,500 --> 00:18:02,380 You did land in the water, though. 254 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:06,500 Oh, yeah. I was wondering why my shorts were sticking to me. 255 00:18:10,700 --> 00:18:12,020 Are you God? 256 00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:15,220 No. Are you God's wife? 257 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:23,360 No. But I am world -renowned figure skater Peggy Fleming. 258 00:18:29,660 --> 00:18:35,580 Yeah, you are Peggy Fleming. And that's the glittery outfit you wore at 259 00:18:35,580 --> 00:18:40,380 Grenoble, France when you were the figure skating champion in the 1968 260 00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:42,160 Olympics. Oh, George. 261 00:18:43,300 --> 00:18:44,760 You're making me blush. 262 00:18:45,340 --> 00:18:49,220 Hey, you're the one that keeps pushing me off that cliff. What the heck's wrong 263 00:18:49,220 --> 00:18:50,019 with you? 264 00:18:50,020 --> 00:18:52,720 Well, I'm doing it to help you get over your fear. 265 00:18:53,060 --> 00:18:54,060 Of dying? 266 00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:55,560 No, of swimming. 267 00:18:55,980 --> 00:18:56,980 Swimming? 268 00:18:57,280 --> 00:18:58,280 Well, that's right. 269 00:18:58,440 --> 00:18:59,620 I never learned how. 270 00:19:01,340 --> 00:19:06,240 Hey, you know, the kids used to tease me because I wouldn't jump off that cliff. 271 00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:08,940 Well, no one's ever going to tease you again. 272 00:19:09,320 --> 00:19:12,120 Why, are you going to run over their feet with your ice skates? 273 00:19:14,350 --> 00:19:19,230 No, I'm just here to remind you that swimming lessons begin at your local 274 00:19:19,230 --> 00:19:20,230 next week. 275 00:19:21,290 --> 00:19:22,290 Oh, yeah. 276 00:19:22,670 --> 00:19:26,630 I keep seeing that flyer in the hardware store. Wait a minute. 277 00:19:26,850 --> 00:19:31,930 Wouldn't this dream have more impact if you were a swimmer? This is your dream, 278 00:19:32,010 --> 00:19:33,010 not mine, George. 279 00:19:33,970 --> 00:19:34,970 Good point. 280 00:19:36,150 --> 00:19:38,510 You want to do a little skinny dipping? 281 00:19:39,870 --> 00:19:43,690 This dream is over, George. But remember... 282 00:19:43,980 --> 00:19:45,900 It's never too late to learn to swim. 283 00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:49,320 It's never too late to learn to swim. 284 00:19:50,260 --> 00:19:52,720 Never too late to learn to swim. 285 00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:56,200 Never too late to learn to swim. 286 00:19:56,500 --> 00:19:59,300 Never too late to learn to swim. 287 00:20:03,760 --> 00:20:06,360 Heaven's too great to spurn within. 288 00:20:07,900 --> 00:20:08,859 That's it. 289 00:20:08,860 --> 00:20:13,100 I believe that George has finally learned to face his fears by seeing 290 00:20:13,470 --> 00:20:15,450 More as a passage than as an end. 291 00:20:16,930 --> 00:20:21,490 I thought he was saying never too late to learn to swim. 292 00:20:23,550 --> 00:20:25,430 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 293 00:20:25,670 --> 00:20:27,910 That's why I have this wall of diplomas. 294 00:20:29,690 --> 00:20:32,830 Anyway, I'm free now if there's anything you would care to discuss. 295 00:20:34,910 --> 00:20:36,230 Actually, there is. 296 00:20:36,590 --> 00:20:37,710 There is something. 297 00:20:39,330 --> 00:20:41,630 Do you ever have the feeling... 298 00:20:43,150 --> 00:20:47,570 that you're the only sane person in a town full of crazies. 299 00:20:50,090 --> 00:20:51,870 Is that how you feel? 300 00:20:52,230 --> 00:20:53,490 All the time. 301 00:20:54,830 --> 00:20:55,830 I see. 302 00:20:57,170 --> 00:21:01,410 Well, my appointment book is in the outer office. Why don't I just go and 303 00:21:01,410 --> 00:21:04,950 you down for, oh, every day next week? 304 00:21:07,030 --> 00:21:09,550 Oh, no, see, I can't afford, uh... 305 00:21:27,540 --> 00:21:28,540 Where's George? 306 00:21:28,780 --> 00:21:30,780 We brought him some Retina A cream. 307 00:21:31,740 --> 00:21:35,040 Not sleeping is like putting out a welcome mat for wrinkles. 308 00:21:36,540 --> 00:21:39,640 And tell him it's very expensive. He should only use it on the parts of his 309 00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:40,640 that show. 310 00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:44,600 Actually, George's sleeping problems are over. 311 00:21:44,940 --> 00:21:45,940 Deja, coincidence. 312 00:21:46,020 --> 00:21:47,680 So are our wolf on woes. 313 00:21:49,100 --> 00:21:50,100 Wheelie. 314 00:21:51,780 --> 00:21:55,740 If our little doggie wants to be a C &W singer, that's OK Corral with us. 315 00:21:56,620 --> 00:21:59,220 Although I still won't do a mother -daughter thing like the Judds. 316 00:22:01,860 --> 00:22:05,440 You know, I... I think you've grown as people. 317 00:22:06,140 --> 00:22:07,260 Oh, I would never say that. 318 00:22:09,420 --> 00:22:12,580 You realize how much money there is in country? I mean, our little coal miner's 319 00:22:12,580 --> 00:22:15,320 daughter, or son, has the potential to rake in bazillions. 320 00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:20,160 Come on, Michael. I'll cook you up a mess of corn bones and a heap of 321 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:23,480 Jambalaya. 322 00:22:25,530 --> 00:22:28,250 Oh, Stephanie, you forgot your wrinkle cream. 323 00:22:29,950 --> 00:22:32,470 Why don't I just leave it there, Joanna? 324 00:22:33,030 --> 00:22:39,890 And later, when you're all alone, I'm sure you'll do the honorable thing. 325 00:22:43,930 --> 00:22:45,070 Well, that does it. 326 00:22:45,290 --> 00:22:48,210 I don't care if their kid's album goes platinum. I'm not going to buy it. 327 00:22:50,310 --> 00:22:53,270 You don't think I need this, do you, honey? 328 00:22:57,230 --> 00:22:58,730 I think George missed the wall over here. 329 00:24:27,980 --> 00:24:29,180 Stephanie, are those headphones? 330 00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:31,740 Actually, they're womb phones. 331 00:24:35,060 --> 00:24:36,060 Womb phones? 332 00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:42,000 Why? See, yesterday there was this German psychologist on that gab show, 333 00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:43,000 Female. 334 00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:45,200 I taped it by accident. 335 00:24:45,940 --> 00:24:49,000 Like you accidentally tape the bold and the beautiful every day? 336 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:52,520 I only watch it for the bold stuff. 337 00:24:54,360 --> 00:25:01,260 Anyway, this German expert said that children in the womb, or womb kinder, 338 00:25:01,260 --> 00:25:03,440 actually hear sounds before they're born. 339 00:25:03,780 --> 00:25:07,620 And what are the young kids listening to these days? 340 00:25:09,280 --> 00:25:12,480 Oh, Mother Goose and that sesame seed stuff. 341 00:25:14,120 --> 00:25:15,880 But not our little biddle. 342 00:25:18,510 --> 00:25:20,730 The art of the deal by Donald Trump? 343 00:25:22,930 --> 00:25:24,690 Today's tykes are tomorrow's tycoons. 344 00:25:26,870 --> 00:25:29,270 Stephanie, I think you're putting too much pressure on the baby. 345 00:25:30,010 --> 00:25:31,850 You should feel what it's doing to my bladder. 346 00:25:35,710 --> 00:25:37,290 Down. This bad boy better blow. 347 00:25:38,110 --> 00:25:41,350 Cans on the bottom, eggs on top. Cans on the bottom, eggs on top. 348 00:25:42,910 --> 00:25:44,690 Hardest working grocery clerk in Vermont. 349 00:25:45,290 --> 00:25:47,410 Cans on the bottom, eggs on top. 350 00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:49,500 Cans on the bottom. 351 00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:52,640 What's on top? 352 00:25:52,860 --> 00:25:53,860 Eggs. Right. 353 00:25:55,080 --> 00:25:56,380 Restless night, George? 354 00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:58,980 Oh, I've been tossing and turning a lot lately. 355 00:25:59,220 --> 00:26:03,840 It's this recurring nightmare I keep having over and over and over again. 356 00:26:04,620 --> 00:26:07,920 Yeah, recurring nightmares are better, you know, when you only have them like 357 00:26:07,920 --> 00:26:08,920 once. 358 00:26:09,860 --> 00:26:10,860 What's it about? 359 00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:16,260 Well, I'm standing on this really high cliff, surrounded by a bluish fog, just 360 00:26:16,260 --> 00:26:17,480 like in those rock videos. 361 00:26:18,140 --> 00:26:20,140 only I'm not wearing spandex pants. 362 00:26:21,660 --> 00:26:23,640 Yeah, that would be a nightmare. 363 00:26:25,700 --> 00:26:31,540 A glittery figure is standing behind me, whispering, jump, George, jump. 364 00:26:31,780 --> 00:26:36,900 And just as I turn to see who it is, I'm pushed off the cliff into the unknown. 365 00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:42,320 I start falling, and just when I'm about to hit the ground, boing, I wake up. 366 00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:46,040 Well, you know, that's because if you hit the ground, you die. 367 00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:51,840 And they say, you know, if you die in your dreams, that you really die. 368 00:26:52,140 --> 00:26:53,380 I didn't know that. 369 00:26:54,260 --> 00:26:55,900 Well, you know, it's just what they say. 370 00:26:56,220 --> 00:26:58,320 Well, they wouldn't say it if they didn't mean it. 371 00:27:00,500 --> 00:27:03,840 George, trust me. You don't have to worry about dying in your sleep. 372 00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:07,020 You bet I don't, because I'm never going to sleep again. 373 00:27:18,090 --> 00:27:19,090 Anybody want coffee? 374 00:27:20,190 --> 00:27:21,390 It's caffeinated. 375 00:27:23,550 --> 00:27:28,570 I think I'll pass, George. Normally, I love a big jolt of caffeine, you know, 376 00:27:28,570 --> 00:27:30,030 just before bedtime. 377 00:27:31,910 --> 00:27:34,250 You're not really planning to stay up forever. 378 00:27:34,570 --> 00:27:35,429 Why not? 379 00:27:35,430 --> 00:27:37,650 Maybe man doesn't really need sleep. 380 00:27:39,450 --> 00:27:42,390 Probably just a lazy habit that he's gotten used to. 381 00:27:43,770 --> 00:27:45,850 I knew you'd mock me. 382 00:27:49,290 --> 00:27:51,650 George Utley to stay awake for the rest of life. 383 00:27:53,270 --> 00:27:55,550 Dick Loudon expected to mock him. 384 00:27:58,290 --> 00:28:00,450 The new editor is really on top of things. 385 00:28:02,150 --> 00:28:04,510 Nice old photo of you with your watermelon. 386 00:28:04,990 --> 00:28:05,990 Oh, thanks. 387 00:28:06,150 --> 00:28:08,530 That was taken the night of my senior prom. 388 00:28:11,070 --> 00:28:12,690 I tried to get a date. 389 00:28:16,430 --> 00:28:18,290 Is this a schedule? 390 00:28:18,830 --> 00:28:22,150 Yeah, some of my pals are taking turns coming over to keep me awake. 391 00:28:23,330 --> 00:28:25,890 You have me down for the 5 a .m. shift. 392 00:28:28,370 --> 00:28:29,910 Well, good night, George. I'm off to bed. 393 00:28:30,390 --> 00:28:32,810 Sweet... Never mind. 394 00:28:44,940 --> 00:28:48,380 This is my brother Daryl, and this is my other brother Daryl. Hey, my first 395 00:28:48,380 --> 00:28:49,380 shift is here. 396 00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:54,780 We come bearing gifts, not unlike three wise men on another special night. 397 00:28:56,120 --> 00:29:01,120 I gather you bring gold, frankincense, and myrrh? 398 00:29:02,300 --> 00:29:05,100 Oh, Dick, you gather incorrectly yet again. 399 00:29:05,540 --> 00:29:08,280 Though you did happen to name two of our accountants. 400 00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:18,400 and myrrh? No, frank and incense. 401 00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:28,020 A thermos of warm milk, your favorite bedtime stories, and Burl Ives' 402 00:29:28,020 --> 00:29:29,020 album. 403 00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:32,900 I thought the object was to keep George awake. 404 00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:34,540 That's where these come in. 405 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:37,240 Nice, sharp knitting needles. 406 00:29:39,480 --> 00:29:45,840 George, listen, I hate to tell you this. I know, you know, you're scared, but... 407 00:29:46,350 --> 00:29:48,030 I mean, you've got to sleep. 408 00:29:48,570 --> 00:29:49,570 Ah! 409 00:29:55,270 --> 00:29:57,690 You made your point, and now Daryl has made his. 410 00:30:00,470 --> 00:30:02,170 Guess I can sleep on my stomach. 411 00:30:23,110 --> 00:30:26,470 It looks like your brothers have had enough excitement for one evening. 412 00:30:27,050 --> 00:30:29,010 They've never been once for small talk. 413 00:30:29,550 --> 00:30:35,070 That's why they continually refuse to attend Mary and Swifty Lazar's post 414 00:30:35,070 --> 00:30:36,150 party at Spago's. 415 00:30:41,310 --> 00:30:45,990 You know, Larry, we've known each other a long time. 416 00:30:46,230 --> 00:30:48,310 I'll bet we have a lot in common. 417 00:30:48,590 --> 00:30:49,529 Like what? 418 00:30:49,530 --> 00:30:51,250 Well, we both wear hats. 419 00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:53,600 Hey, you're right. 420 00:30:54,000 --> 00:30:55,000 Want to switch? 421 00:30:55,420 --> 00:30:56,420 Okay. 422 00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:08,760 Want to switch back? 423 00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:10,000 Okay. 424 00:31:22,260 --> 00:31:24,400 Hop, hop, hop, hop. 425 00:31:28,580 --> 00:31:31,880 Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop. 426 00:31:32,660 --> 00:31:33,660 Morning, Dick. 427 00:31:34,020 --> 00:31:36,960 You remember Miss Goddard, the town librarian? 428 00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:41,820 Hop aboard. There's always room for another cute boy, Bunny. 429 00:31:42,160 --> 00:31:46,600 Mr. Rosnock of Circus of Shoes, touch my hips and die. 430 00:31:51,920 --> 00:31:52,920 Not anymore, George. 431 00:31:53,820 --> 00:31:56,000 Hey, you're early for your shift. 432 00:31:56,260 --> 00:31:57,960 This is bunny hopping time. 433 00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:00,980 George, the 50s were bunny hopping time. 434 00:32:01,300 --> 00:32:06,200 4 a .m. is... It's sleeping time. 435 00:32:06,540 --> 00:32:08,640 It's guys like you who kill the hustle. 436 00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:13,600 Why don't you take this hop -a -thon back to your place? 437 00:32:13,940 --> 00:32:15,040 And wake my elk? 438 00:32:17,320 --> 00:32:19,220 You keep an elk in your apartment? 439 00:32:19,500 --> 00:32:20,680 I've got two bedrooms. 440 00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:24,920 Well, then, you got the room. 441 00:32:26,060 --> 00:32:29,380 George, your bunny hopping is waking up the entire inn. 442 00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:36,700 Larry and the guys don't mind the noise. 443 00:32:36,980 --> 00:32:43,660 They've been... Larry says they chase 444 00:32:43,660 --> 00:32:44,880 cars in their sleep. 445 00:32:48,140 --> 00:32:49,600 I've seen them do it awake. 446 00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:54,360 Hand the chalk, boys. Time for another bunny hop sandwich. 447 00:32:55,300 --> 00:32:56,740 No, no sandwich. 448 00:32:59,260 --> 00:33:01,480 Everyone out of here and go to sleep. 449 00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:05,760 If George sleeps, he dreams. If he dreams, he dies. 450 00:33:06,460 --> 00:33:08,500 Is that what you want, Loudon? 451 00:33:09,660 --> 00:33:13,420 Miss Goddard, you're an educated woman. Tell George it's just an old wives' 452 00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:14,560 tale. 453 00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:16,620 Oh, George, I don't want you... 454 00:33:22,060 --> 00:33:25,100 It's moments like these that make me wish God had given me emotions. 455 00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:31,600 It's moments like these that make me question this town's sanity. 456 00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:38,960 If I have to die, I want to die a hero's death, like fixing a TV antenna in the 457 00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:39,960 middle of a thunderstorm. 458 00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:44,500 Not like some cartoon coyote falling off a cliff. 459 00:33:45,100 --> 00:33:48,240 Pardon me, but Wile E. Coyote never actually dies. 460 00:33:48,460 --> 00:33:52,300 The impact just forces his legs into his head and he walks around all squished 461 00:33:52,300 --> 00:33:53,300 up for a few minutes. 462 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:56,380 Well, I don't want that to happen either. 463 00:33:56,880 --> 00:34:00,380 Well, maybe you could try flapping your arms before you crash like this. 464 00:34:01,300 --> 00:34:02,300 That'll work. 465 00:34:02,650 --> 00:34:06,310 Well, I don't know. My arms aren't as mighty as yours. 466 00:34:07,070 --> 00:34:11,949 I'd better just stay awake. Perhaps I could provide some alluring diversion. 467 00:34:13,370 --> 00:34:15,750 Hey, no diversions in my inn. 468 00:34:17,310 --> 00:34:22,449 George, I'm worried about you. I mean, bunny hopping at four in the morning. 469 00:34:23,670 --> 00:34:27,989 I think you need professional help. From Arthur Murray? 470 00:34:30,130 --> 00:34:31,889 No, from Dr. Mary Kaiser. 471 00:34:33,670 --> 00:34:37,810 Dick, everybody knows no Utley has ever been to a psychiatrist. 472 00:34:38,750 --> 00:34:44,150 Well, you know, I knew no Utley had ever been to a chiropractor. Do you think I 473 00:34:44,150 --> 00:34:45,210 need a shrink? 474 00:34:45,449 --> 00:34:49,050 I thought you were my friend. Look, George, I'll... I'm not finished. 475 00:34:50,570 --> 00:34:51,570 Or was I? 476 00:34:53,830 --> 00:34:58,130 I guess maybe I was. No, no, there's more. 477 00:35:00,460 --> 00:35:05,980 You may think I'm confused, but there are two things I'm absolutely sure of. 478 00:35:06,200 --> 00:35:08,360 One is that I don't need therapy. 479 00:35:09,500 --> 00:35:12,380 And what's the other one? I bunny hop or I die. 480 00:35:13,240 --> 00:35:15,620 Come on, George, grab my hips and live! 481 00:35:34,440 --> 00:35:36,860 I hope you enjoyed your stay. 482 00:35:37,380 --> 00:35:40,720 Right. That's why I'm checking out at 7 a .m. 483 00:35:41,300 --> 00:35:44,660 I'll hop, hop, hop over to the Ramada and get some sleep. 484 00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:52,600 I wish you'd give us another shot. This really is a very peaceful little end. 485 00:36:01,100 --> 00:36:06,100 I can't help noticing this wall doesn't do anything except hold up those 486 00:36:06,100 --> 00:36:07,100 pictures. 487 00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:12,740 And the fireplace, and the ceiling, and the big support beam that supports 488 00:36:12,740 --> 00:36:16,020 everything in the end. I don't care. I'm taking her down. 489 00:36:16,240 --> 00:36:21,020 George, George, you've been awake for 32 hours. You're tired, very tired. 490 00:36:21,380 --> 00:36:22,480 Give me the salt. 491 00:36:22,760 --> 00:36:23,940 Turn it off for me. 492 00:36:26,680 --> 00:36:28,760 George, why don't you just... 493 00:36:29,390 --> 00:36:31,190 Bid to yourself with something else. 494 00:36:31,510 --> 00:36:34,170 Well, there is that leaky gas line in the basement. 495 00:36:35,090 --> 00:36:36,870 I'll get my blowtorch. George! 496 00:36:38,530 --> 00:36:44,350 Why don't you just tinker? Yeah, I can tinker. I can tinker better than anyone. 497 00:36:44,650 --> 00:36:45,810 Don't sleep, tinker. 498 00:36:46,390 --> 00:36:48,250 Don't sleep, just tinker. 499 00:36:48,550 --> 00:36:49,550 Tinker! 500 00:36:50,830 --> 00:36:54,070 Morning. Oh, hi. I was just coming up to wake you. 501 00:36:58,570 --> 00:37:00,890 A simple tap on the shoulder would have sufficed. 502 00:37:06,770 --> 00:37:08,230 Something wrong? 503 00:37:10,550 --> 00:37:12,350 The womb phones double -crossed us. 504 00:37:13,110 --> 00:37:16,830 We thought Trump was teaching our baby how to use strong -arm tactics to wangle 505 00:37:16,830 --> 00:37:17,930 other babies out of their millions. 506 00:37:19,330 --> 00:37:20,870 But the tape wasn't playing. 507 00:37:21,130 --> 00:37:23,630 All this time, the recorder was switched to radio. 508 00:37:24,090 --> 00:37:25,090 AM radio. 509 00:37:28,140 --> 00:37:29,660 to a country western station. 510 00:37:32,180 --> 00:37:33,180 Ew. 511 00:37:34,900 --> 00:37:38,000 Oh, God. Right now our child is doing a two -step. 512 00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:43,240 Well, it certainly has wound to dance. 513 00:37:46,220 --> 00:37:48,820 Nice, Dick. A pathetic pun during our moment of crisis. 514 00:37:49,540 --> 00:37:51,760 Oh, don't listen to Dick. I don't. 515 00:37:53,340 --> 00:37:55,160 Why don't the two of you go get some breakfast? 516 00:37:57,770 --> 00:37:59,790 I suppose a nice bowl of grits would help. 517 00:38:00,070 --> 00:38:03,890 Michael! Did you hear what I said? I said grits! What's happening to me? 518 00:38:04,730 --> 00:38:06,610 It's the demon hayseed inside you. 519 00:38:07,910 --> 00:38:08,910 Oh, Michael! 520 00:38:09,230 --> 00:38:11,930 Please promise me we won't have to move to the Ozarks. 521 00:38:12,530 --> 00:38:14,990 I wish I could, Steph, but I can't. Oh! 522 00:38:24,450 --> 00:38:30,370 That, uh... That was... That wall been bothering you too, George? Oh, no. 523 00:38:31,110 --> 00:38:32,250 I like this wall. 524 00:38:32,890 --> 00:38:34,110 These are just love taps. 525 00:38:36,050 --> 00:38:37,330 Not a dick, Dick. 526 00:38:38,570 --> 00:38:42,410 Yeah, all right. I'd better call for an appointment with Dr. 527 00:38:42,670 --> 00:38:43,670 Kaiser. 528 00:38:43,690 --> 00:38:45,210 You want to make one for me too? 529 00:38:53,710 --> 00:38:57,270 The receptionist said that Dr. Kaiser would be right out. 530 00:38:57,610 --> 00:39:01,510 As soon as she revs up her atomic brain machine. 531 00:39:03,010 --> 00:39:06,810 She doesn't use machines, George. She just talks. 532 00:39:07,250 --> 00:39:09,270 Okay, but she better not get personal. 533 00:39:10,970 --> 00:39:12,530 That's her job, George. 534 00:39:13,190 --> 00:39:15,670 Don't you understand the concept of therapy? 535 00:39:16,310 --> 00:39:22,730 Maybe I don't. Or maybe you're just transferring hostility to avoid 536 00:39:22,730 --> 00:39:24,510 your own feelings of inadequacy. 537 00:39:27,740 --> 00:39:30,440 Hello. You must be George. 538 00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:34,200 It's like she's undressing my mind with her eyes. 539 00:39:35,420 --> 00:39:39,500 And Dick, I haven't seen you since that marriage counseling group last year. 540 00:39:40,540 --> 00:39:42,700 And how is your lovely ex -wife, Joanna? 541 00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:46,680 We're still married. 542 00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:50,100 Lost that bet. 543 00:39:52,060 --> 00:39:55,820 And now, if you don't mind. Oh, right. I'll just, I'll wait. 544 00:40:00,940 --> 00:40:03,420 Well, then, where shall we start? 545 00:40:03,660 --> 00:40:04,740 I don't want to die. 546 00:40:06,420 --> 00:40:07,420 Let's start there. 547 00:40:08,260 --> 00:40:10,260 Would you like to lie down? Okay. 548 00:40:13,000 --> 00:40:16,000 I see your little game. 549 00:40:16,660 --> 00:40:20,220 I lie down, all my change falls between the cushions. 550 00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:24,060 You found me out, George. 551 00:40:25,380 --> 00:40:27,680 Oh, that ain't gonna happen, lady. 552 00:40:32,650 --> 00:40:39,430 I think what we should do is have you close your eyes, relax, and describe 553 00:40:39,430 --> 00:40:40,348 dream to me. 554 00:40:40,350 --> 00:40:42,870 Well, I'm standing on this cliff. 555 00:40:43,150 --> 00:40:46,330 And you're covered in a hazy sort of bluish fog. 556 00:40:47,170 --> 00:40:48,270 How did you know? 557 00:40:48,750 --> 00:40:50,050 I read it in the paper. 558 00:40:52,430 --> 00:40:54,250 And that glittery figure... 41560

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