All language subtitles for Newhart s04e05 Candidate Larry

Mayor Dodds, isn't it true that you plan
to support the development of Stony

Ridge Woods?

Nope. Oh.

Good.

I just support cutting down all the
trees and selling the lumber.

Mayor Dodds, we elected you because you
promised not to do anything.

Yeah.

Now, Chester, I don't think I need to
stand up here and point out how little

I've done.

We all have something to gain here.

The Stony Ridge Project will bring in
lots of revenue and some of the most fun

people in the world.

Loggers!

I'm Dick Loudon. My wife and I own the
Stratford Inn, and a lot of the tourists

who stay there come up here for the
foliage.

You can't have foliage without trees.

I disagree!

Maybe you people don't appreciate the
beauty of this area, but my wife and I

from New York, and they've cut down all
the trees there.

Tourists still come to New York, don't
they, Dick?

Not for trees.

Aha! So you don't need trees for
tourists.

Thank you for pointing that out, Dick.

Jim and I used to play in those woods
when we were kids.

You're not just cutting down trees,
you're cutting down memories.

Chester, aren't memories even more
precious when you're remembering

that's gone?

Boy, this guy's good.

I think it's time I spoke up.

I'm George Utley. I've lived in this
town all my life. I went to school at

Ashton Elementary.

I disagree.

Gee, I never got static on that before.

Well, if no one has anything else to
say, this meeting is now... Excuse me.

Hi, I'm Larry.

This is my brother, Daryl. And this is
my other brother, Daryl.

We used to live in them woods, and they
wouldn't be the same without trees.

I mean, where are the birds gonna park
it?

They're gonna drive away your robins,
your crows.

Your metal art. Sir.

I believe I have the floor.

Your blue jays. Your sparrows. And let's
not forget your finches.

The most tasty of them all.

Well, meeting adjourned.

Uh, I do hope you'll all remember the
name Dodds when you're voting two weeks

from Tuesday.

We gotta find somebody to run against
Mayor Dodds. Yeah, I nominate... Hey,

Chester. Jim. Oh, come on. You were
mayor once before and you were great.

You didn't do a thing.

Thanks.

But I promised my wife I wouldn't run
again.

Keeping things from happening can take
over your life.

You think Joanna would let you run for
mayor?

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm much too busy.

Too bad. You'd have made a good one. I
disagree.

Isn't she adorable?

The cutest thing I've ever seen.

I'm coming downstairs now, but you can
keep talking about me if you want to.

Get ready for the biggest awe yet.

Oh.

A cute, adorable, attention -grabbing
puppy.

Oh, she's so cuddly and soft.

And such pretty color. Not unlike my new
sweater.

It's cute, Steph.

Look at those eyes.

Does a person have to have a wet nose to
get some attention around here?

Look at that little wet nose.

Michael!

Is that cuddly little creature yours?
And what's its life expectancy?

This is Juliet, my friend Bruce's dog.
I'm taking care of her while he looks

an apartment in New York.

Oh, isn't that nice?

Well, if we're going to get to the
movies, you better stick her in a drawer

something.

Change of plan, Senorita Bonita.

I thought we'd go on a shopping spree
instead.

They're having a squeak toy spectacular
at the house of Bow Wow.

I want to go to the vet's and buy some
vitamins, and I'll have to buy some

newspaper so she can stay on top of
current events.

Michael, I'm not interested in doing any
of those things.

Oh, fine. Well, I'll call you tonight,
and I'll tell you all about it.

Boy, that sure is a cute puppy. Shut up,
George.

I guess I had that coming.

Hi. I'm Larry. I know.

You're Larry, Daryl, and Daryl. Right.

We'd like to talk to your husband if
he's decent.

Of course, Daryl here don't care either
way.

Dear?

Hi, guys. What can I do for you?

We're here today as three of the great
unwashed.

Really?

We got to do something about saving
Stony Ridge Woods.

What we have to find is someone who'll
run against Mayor Dodds.

I've called everybody in town and no one
wants to run.

Okay, I'll do it.

Larry, you're not suggesting that...

That you run for mayor. You said no one
else would do it.

There's got to be someone I haven't
called.

Why bother?

You agreed with everything I said at the
meeting last night, didn't you? Yeah,

except maybe which bird is the tastiest.

The point is, I don't think you'd stand
a chance of winning.

I got a better chance of getting votes
than if nobody ran.

Maybe.

That's all I need to hear. Come on,
Daryl. Let's get our tools.

I read somewhere a candidate should put
together a platform.

Dick, is it true Larry, Daryl, and Daryl
are running for mayor?

Don't be silly. Just Larry.

Well, we found somebody else to run
against Mayor Dodds. Yeah, somebody who

shaves.

Me. Great.

So, Dick, do I have your endorsement?
With all the influence that goes with

Want to hear my slogan?

Sure. Vote for Chester for mayor.

Catchy. I wrote it.

Well, thanks for your endorsement, Dick.
Oh, and what's our battle cry?

Vote for Chester for mayor.

It's like a Cole Porter lyric.

Juliet, wherefore art thou, Juliet?

Oh, what a cute puppy.

My name is Juliet.

Smart, too.

Here, Dick, score some points with this.

This is almost too easy.

Cujo's back.

Steph, great news. My friend Bruce found
an apartment.

Oh, well, goodbye, Juliet. I'll never
forget you.

You bet you won't, Steph. That's the
good news. The landlord won't let him

pets, so Juliet is mine forever.

Oh, these are glad tidings.

Don't you think we should have discussed
this first?

I'm sorry, Steph. I couldn't help it.
Just like I couldn't help getting this.

Oh, Michael!

It's beautiful.

Wait till you see what it looks like on.

Say hello to Juliet Harris.

Michael.

I've kept my feelings to myself.

But I refuse to share your affections
with this flea circus.

Now you have a choice to make.

Fur or flesh.

Whoa.

Torn between two mammals.

Hi. I'm candidate Larry.

I recognize everybody.

my campaign slogan.

Larry, there's something... If anyone's
still straddling the fence after that,

we got these.

Larry and Dick Loudon, two men, one
mind.

Larry, I think that should be two men of
one mind.

Oh, I wish you'd said something earlier.

Daryl, looks like you're going to have
to spend the rest of the day chasing

cars.

Hold it, hold it.

Guys, that won't be necessary.

Chester Wanamaker has decided to run for
mayor, and since he feels the same way

we do about the woods, now that he's
running, you can drop out of the race.

No way.

I got a better chance to win than him.

I got something he ain't never going to
have.

Your endorsement.

Uh, Larry?

What I'm trying to say is I've given
Chester my endorsement. Well, okay.

But it kind of dilutes the significance
if you endorse the both of us.

Larry, I only endorsed him. I never
endorsed you.

One day in politics and already I've
been stabbed in the back.

It's just that I have this crazy feeling
that...

Chester has a better chance of winning.

Why? Well, a mayor has to inspire
confidence. He has to be a skilled

administrator. He has to understand the
intricacies of running a community.

That's me in a nutshell.

Larry, drop out of the race.

No, sir.

Them woods was my home, and no one can
defend them better than me.

Larry, you're just going to get hurt.

How can anything hurt worse than a knife
in the back?

Come on, Daryl. Let's go shake some
babies.

Kiss babies.

Sure. Set us up for another fall.

Hi, George.

Chester. Thanks for helping me with my
speech deck, especially for the opening

joke.

What opening joke?

Oh, at the meet the candidates debate
tonight, Chester is going to say, ladies

and gentlemen, I've come here tonight to
ask for your support.

Not that I couldn't stand up without it.

Chester?

I'll catch him before he goes on.

Did you tell the joke right or is it
just not funny?

George, it's hard for me to help Chester
when I have all this guilt about Larry.

I feel like I betrayed him.

Hi, I'm Larry.

Vote for Larry.

Save the trees.

Don't stay at Stratford Inn.

Apparently he feels the same way. He'll
probably never talk to me again.

It sounds like you're going to miss
Larry.

Not miss, miss.

You know, it's like when you have a mole
removed, you know?

You never really wanted it, but you kind
of missed the bump.

I've got my puppy, but is my kitten
around?

I hate to answer a question like that,
but Stephanie's upstairs.

Steph! Oh, we're going to meet the
candidate debate tonight. Are you and

Stephanie going?

What am I saying?

Michael, I thought I told you not to
come back until you dumped the other

Don't worry, Steph, she's...

She's got one paw out the door as we
speak.

I'm passing flyers around the
neighborhood trying to find her a home,

could just watch her for a while.

You're leaving her here?

Steph, I can't take her with me.

I think she knows what's going on.

Michael! Bye, girls.

Michael!

Look, I've got things to do, so just sit
there and... Keep your yap shut.

Don't give me that look.

I invented it.

And you're doing it wrong.

It goes like this.

Look, just play with your silly toy and
stop bothering me.

Oh, do I have to do everything?

Come on, Juliet.

Oh, you like that, huh?

I'll bet you think I'm going to do it
again.

his part. I think it's high time we did
ours.

Thank you. Thank you.

George. Oh, sorry.

Boy, that guy can really tamper with
your mind.

Good evening. I'm Chester Wanamaker.

Dick Loudon wrote me a real funny
opening joke, but he told me not to tell

The survival of Stony Ridge Woods is at
stake.

Now, I know money is important to all of
us. I disagree.

Well, it's important to the rest of us.

But I, for one, would rather have the
green of the leaf than the green of the

dollar.

Ditto. Ditto.

Daryl thinks I should expand on that.

Daryl and I used to have a business
called Anything for a Book.

Well, there's some things you don't do
for twice that amount.

You don't... destroy things that are
beautiful.

If you keep developing the land, you
lose what drew people to it in the first

place.

Some things can't be improved upon.

Things like the first sound a baby
makes.

Things like Daryl's fettuccine Alfredo.

And Stony Ridge Woods.

The men upstairs will take care of them
babies.

Daryl will keep an eye on that
fettuccine.

But it's up to us to protect them woods.

You know what I like about you?

You're so down to earth.

And how many candidates aren't afraid to
say, I don't know?

I don't know.

I guess you heard the election results.

What makes you think so? We ain't
partying yet, are we?

Well, who won?

Larry.

Wait a minute. He didn't win.

He didn't?

Chester won.

Well, does that count absentee ballots?

I'm real big with servicemen overseas.

It's over.

Darn. But the woods were saved, and I
think your speech had something to do

it. Which one?

Ditto or the wordy one?

Probably a combination.

But I think you campaigned admirably.

Except for shaking a few babies.

Well, what was the vote anyway?

Gee, I don't know.

Exactly.

Something like 419 to

321 to around five.

Well, is that second place fellow in
this room?

How around five was it?

Three.

Three? Just a second. You voted for me,
and I voted for me.

Benedict Darrell here.

Whichever one of you it is, I guess
blood isn't as thick as your head.

Larry, one more vote wouldn't have put
you over the top.

I guess that's it.

People have jeered.

What if I've only got three votes? Is
there something wrong with me?

It's just that you have this certain
image that for some reason

Didn't fit with Mayor.

What is my image?

I think people think of you as more a
restaurateur.

Oh, you want a burger? No.

I, on the other hand, think of you as
a... Yes?

A friend.

I guess I wanted something after all.

I guess that's it. I guess it's time for
my concession speech.

Hi, I lost.

Okay, let's party.

Look at that.

Even in defeat.

Honest, direct, concise.

I say we really missed out.

Bad news, Steph.

My friend Bruce found an apartment. No!

Yes, they take pets.

Bruce picked Juliet up about half an
hour ago. And you just let her go?

Steph, my heart's already been ripped
into kibbles and bits.

You've got to look on the bright side.
No more walking her three times a day.

No more getting fur all over my dress.

And best of all, we've still got each
other.

Oh, Michael.