Original subtitles

And Del must be Swahili for Angel.

How else do you explain a person who puts the needs and wants of others above

her own?

Whether it's opening up the den to aspiring rappers, giving long -winded

to ungrateful teenagers, or loaning her car to her trifling boyfriend, And Del

is always there when you need her.

That'll be $8, boo.

Now beat it. I need the table.

I wonder how you say all an angel while you live.

Marisha, honey, can we get this started, please? Your father and I are trying to

catch an 8 o 'clock showing at Jackie Brown.

Yeah, Pam Grier's back, baby. Friday Foster, Foxy Brown, coffee.

You keep talking like that, Frank, the only coffee you're going to get

is from Starbucks.

Okay, well, as you all know, Andell's 30th birthday is approaching.

Honey, didn't we just celebrate her 27th last year?

Yeah, but that was before I snagged a copy of her birth certificate.

Andalusia Louise Wilkinson. And she calls me country.

And for good reason, Kim.

Yeah, what's the color?

Well, you see, Miles, once upon a time there was... Pam Grier, Frank.

It's a long story, son.

Thank you, Dean.

Because Andal is such a good friend to all of us, I think that we should throw

her a surprise party.

Marisha, that's so considerate of you, but we really do have to get going. So

why don't we just have the party here, and your father and I will take care of

refreshments. Oh, what a coincidence, because that's what I got you down for.

Coincidence, my foot. We're the only ones with money.

All right, thank you.

Okay, look.

Kim and Nisi, you're in charge of the guest list, invitations, and the cake.

Hakeem and Miles, you're in charge of the decoration slash cleanup. So what

you going to do?

Well, as coordinator, I'll tell you where to decorate and when to clean up.

Now, Thursday is the party. party the 22nd, so wrap up your responsibilities

the 21st. Well, why don't we do this on Saturday?

Because J .W. is taking her out of town that weekend.

And you believed it?

She is as clueless as Andalusia.

Can we get it closed?

Yeah. Big Mama not working that night. She can do it.

What in

the hell did

you do to my article?

What the hell did you do with your hair?

It's butchered.

Well, Morgan, next time try a real salon.

That's a crap, Mary Ellen.

That's exactly what I did, hence my title editor.

The next time you edit my work, you may want to have someone else start your

car.

Like I've never been threatened before.

You're going to drive me back to smoking.

Oh, your little patch not working?

Oh, Chris?

How are we coming with the bake sale story?

My talent's being wasted. I should be doing my investigative expose on

Styrofoam.

But you're not.

Remember, five o 'clock deadline.

Don't mess with me, Opie.

I just wanted to tell you that I just finished reading the banner, and I

it was a wonderful issue.

I'd love to be a part of the staff.

Well, thank you, Moesha.

Unfortunately, I'm not the one you should be sucking up to.

Mary Ellen's the editor.

But aren't you the faculty advisor?

Yes, and I'm advising you to talk to Mary Ellen.

So pucker up.

wonderful issue.

Why, thank you, Em.

As editor, I strive for excellence.

But you're just missing one little thing.

What? A comma?

No, no, I meant me.

Oh, Em, we already have someone who puts the papers in those little bins.

But thank you for your interest.

No, Mary Ellen, I was talking about writing on the paper.

Oh, dear.

Is that a problem?

Well, quite frankly, it is. We're completely staffed. But, Mary Ellen, I

experience. Here are my clips. I was editor at Crenshaw. And I'm the editor

Bridgewood, and we have nothing to discuss.

Would you be referring to the nothing between these pages or the nothing that

I'm looking at?

Cute, cute, cute.

But ending sentences with prepositions won't get you onto my staff.

Happy birthday, Andy.

Who's Andy?

You know, Andy L.

Yeah, we couldn't squeeze the E -L -L on, so the Y was my idea.

You can't just change a person's name.

Why not, Mrs. Mitch? Because you... Never mind. Just make another banner.

See, man, I told you not to listen to me. You wouldn't want television.

You got the decorations.

Dee, somebody needs to have a talk with Mary Ellen, preferably with some brass

knuckles and a dash of pepper spray.

Ooh, I see that you and Mary Ellen are getting along like Charles Barkley and

anybody.

I mean, it's like she goes out of her way to make my life miserable.

Do you know she had the nerve not to give me a spot on the school paper?

Well, she can keep you off the paper, but she can't keep you from writing. No,

.C., you don't understand. She thinks just because she...

That's a great idea. Thank you.

You're welcome.

I guess.

Hot stuff.

I beg your pardon?

I'm talking about your newsletter, not you.

Thanks. I'm Morgan and this is Marco.

Yo, Moesha, this is dope. Even though your graphics suck.

Excuse me?

Tell her how you really feel, Marco.

Marco's a really great graphic artist.

Right, right.

So here's the deal.

Mary Ellen froze Marco off the banner just like she did you. Yeah, but skip

and the banner. I want to be on the blurb. I rock it Marco style.

While he's rocking, I'll be writing.

Well, guys, thanks for the offer, but... Who knows when I'll do this again.

Hi, Em.

Read your little news sheet. Cute.

Thank you, Mary Ellen. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

You surely didn't expect your flyer to compete with the banner.

Are you saying that I can't compete with you?

By the looks of this and your outfit?

No.

Mary Ellen, I'm not typically a violent person, but does the word beat down mean

anything to you?

You're so predictable.

Then you should know that this means I'm going to continue publishing the blurb.

Isn't that special?

Well, I have a deadline. The banners due out next week. So is the blurb.

Fine. Fine.

So you guys still want a job?

Let's rock this.

Yes.

Morgan, what is this?

It's my tribute to Kurt Cobain.

Okay, Morgan, I can tell from the page count that you really loved him.

But see, we're looking for something more, uh, what's the word? Current?

Well, I had an interview scheduled with Sodom and Sodom, but I missed my flight

to Iraq.

Yo, Marwisha, I can't work on this box you call a computer.

What's wrong with it, Marco?

Look at it. The thing's a dinosaur.

At the very least, I need a multicolor scanner and a 32 -bit digital image

enhancer, not to mention a much faster modem.

Marco, we're trying to put out a newspaper, not email E .T.

Besides, if you're as good as you claim, you can work with this.

Oh, a motivator.

I like her.

Why are y 'all whispering?

Get still.

Guys, look, the decorations are over there. I know I was supposed to help you

decorate for Ando's party, but I can't right now. I got a paper to get out, and

I have way too much work to do.

That's what you said about the invitations.

That I wound up addressing. And I had the mail. That I licked the stamps.

Please, that was a snack for you.

Look, you guys, I don't mean to be a flake, but I tell you what, I'll be

over here if you need me.

Okay? You guys?

I have been thinking, we need to put a spin on this Cobain story.

How? He's dead.

Courtney Love isn't.

All we have to do is use her in the lead, punch it up a little bit, and we

story. Oh, man, I had a dope catty graphic.

Now, listen, remember, be very, very careful, okay? This is the 12th banner

made.

Ooh, good job, my kid. Yeah.

Ooh, are you sure it only took you 12 times?

get a reprieve this time. Get lost, Miles.

See,

now we don't have a banner.

Yo, I can make you a new one on the computer.

Who?

Who are you?

Hakeem, Kim, Nisi, this is Morgan and Marco. They're working with me on the

newspaper.

I'll get it.

Yo, let's knock this banner out. No, let's knock this paper out. We got a

deadline. Don't worry, we got time.

I'm the best, remember?

Chris, what are you doing here? The same thing you guys are, defecting.

Chris, what's up with those shades?

Well, the depleting ozone layers left my eyes very sensitive to UV rays.

Chris, it's nighttime.

Oh.

Well, not only do I have delicate retinas, I'm also a coward. Mm -hmm, and

look like Ron Howard.

But, Chris, that's beside the point. Welcome to the Blurred.

Okay, and the cake is how much?

All right, cool. I'll be there by 6.

What do you mean you close at 5?

But, yeah, I understand English.

All right, all right. I'll be there.

Sorry, I'm back. Look, something came up. Do you mind if I bring my layout in

little late?

But, yeah, I understand English.

We got to get the cake before everybody gets here. Look, you guys, I'm really in

a bind. If I don't get my layout to the copy center in time, I'm not going to

have a paper tomorrow.

And I can't get school by the banner.

So can you guys please pick up the cake for me?

Excuse me, you're the only one with a core.

I'm sorry, but I don't have time.

If you weren't going to drive, you could have told me before I wore my party

shoes.

Can you guys help me, please?

Help you? Man, that's all we've been doing for the last two weeks.

Yeah, come on, y 'all. Let's go.

Yeah, well, hold on. Don't forget to pick up Andell. Oh, oh, do we have to do

that, too? No, I can't. I'll pick her up. Can you just leave so I can take

of this, please?

Please.

Oh. What?

One last thing.

We need bus fare.

needs to tell girlfriends it's over.

Yeah, she just started the party. I heard she still hits the club.

Ooh, that's somebody's mama. I know.

Hey, hey, y 'all better stop talking about my Auntie Jean.

Man, she taught me all my moves.

And she's a first -generation cell -trained dancer.

Go, Icy!

Go, Icy!

Baby Mo should have been here hours ago.

Honey, maybe she's still working on her paper.

Go, Mom!

I'd rather get my sleep off.

Giselle, Andel left over an hour ago.

Look, Andel's my friend and all.

But she don't make a part.

And neither does Miles.

It's bedtime.

Thanks, Dee. I owe you one.

So, uh, can we call you a cab?

For what? I've got my car.

But if you want to do something, how about refreshing my drink?

Oh, come on, woman. You drink everything but the dishwater.

No more drink?

That's okay. I'm from Detroit. We know how to keep a party going.

Instant punch?

Hook this up, Frank. It's a new flavor, pina colada.

So, brown sugar, how about you and me touch zero?

Now I'm about to roll up out of here.

gets Andell's birthday party.

Oh, my God, Andell. Moesha, honey, what happened?

Yeah, baby, you missed the party.

I'm sorry. I had to make some last -minute changes on my paper, and I lost

of time.

Baby, this party is over.

But if you want to get your groove on, grab your fake ID and follow me. It's

latest night at Club Little J's.

Uh -uh, girl, that's tomorrow night.

But, uh, what do I know? I'm a kid who never been to Club Little J's with a

ID. I did.

Maybe next time.

Send my punch home by Nisi.

Hey, Mom.

You threw a great party.

Yeah. Too bad you missed it.

What happened? You forgot where you lived?

Where's Andel?

Oh, been gone.

Yeah, probably slobbering on her pillow right now.

Did she enjoy herself? I mean, was she surprised? Who brought her over?

Who cares?

You didn't.

There's me and Giselle.

There's me, Frank, and Giselle.

There's me, D. Frank, and Giselle.

There's J .W. and Giselle. What?

Well, dang it, there wasn't your party or Giselle's.

I found the picture without Giselle.

I recognize that. Ask your elbows anyway.

Elbows, nothing.

Those are my knees.

Oh, y 'all know y 'all wrong.

But a little cocoa butter wouldn't kill you.

me about your newspaper. How'd it turn out?

Well, I think I got a copy.

And, Del, I'm sorry about last night.

Why? Thanks to you, I had a great birthday.

But I didn't do anything.

I heard my jam of the year was your idea.

Well, I guess I did do something, huh?

Oh, you did a lot. I'm just sorry you had to miss it.

But I'm proud of you.

This paper looks good.

Maybe there's a pill to turn your future.

Thank you.

But until then, help me with this order. All right.

There goes Giselle again.

Where? On J .W.'s lap.

That's not my auntie.

Dang, she promised.

Hey, guys, what are we laughing at?

Oh, you had to be there.

Back off a moment, all right? But she missed your 30th birthday party.

room will be 30 for at least three more years.

Besides, y 'all had a good time.

Yeah, yeah, but it would have been better if Mo had been there.

You really mean that?

Nope, but I'm not going to bite the hand that feeds me.

So are we cool?

Yeah.

Especially if you hook me up with that Marco guy, because he's kind of cute.

know, just my type.

promise me one thing. What?

When my birthday rolls around, don't throw me a party, just throw me the

I

can't believe

that even you would stoop so low as to steal my writers.

Mediocre as they may be. Who are you calling mediocre?

Look, Mary Ellen, I didn't... Still, then, they came seeking asylum. Isn't

like... I plead the fifth. I don't know anything.

All right, Miss Fitz, listen up.

After reading the blurb and the Bridgewood banner, I've concluded that

should merge.

But don't we run the risk of watering down real news for fluff?

Yes, but I believe the blurb will keep its edge.

Well, who's going to be the editor?

Mariella. Naturally. And Moesha.

You'll be co -editors.

Co -editors, that's a start.

But that is unconstitutional.

It's criminal.

It's unheard of. Not anymore. I'm the teacher, i .e., the boss.

And don't end your sentences with a preposition.

Okay, you Mark Rakers, you've got a paper to get out. Let's do it.

I used to think the saying biting off more than you can chew only applied to

Hakeem, Mike Tyson, and Chris Benson.

But now, I can add myself to the list.

From now on, I'm going to prioritize my life, especially now that I'm co -editor

of the newspaper.

I finally have a voice at Bridgewood, and believe me, I'm going to use it.

I am teenager.

Hear me roar.