Original subtitles

Hello.

The rocket ship from Earth has succeeded in reaching us.

Earthmen are now disembarking. Captain Simmis is bringing them here.

I knew that someday these scientists would go too far. The fools.

They should never have come here.

So these are Earthmen?

How do you do?

Yes, sir. That's us. Earthmen.

Greetings, sir. My name is Professor Jones, and these are my three aides.

Salutations.

I am the Grand Zilch of Zunev, and this is my chief aide, the High Mucky Muck.

How do you do?

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered.

And don't forget to see Pal Joey, folks.

Hey, fellas, it's not cold up here.

Oh, certainly not. We manufacture our own weather.

What do you know?

How about that?

our buildings are air -conditioned and have every modern convenience.

We are way ahead of you earth people.

We suspect that such possibilities.

We seek more knowledge of you and your friendship.

Yeah, we'd like to know what's cooking.

Such as dames.

You don't happen to have any spare telephone numbers, do you?

Indeed.

Introduce these gentlemen to some of our ladies while I talk with the professor.

This way, gentlemen.

We are most anxious to learn the secrets of your being, how you exist, and... We

exist through power.

Atomic electricity flows through our veins instead of blood like yours.

We create life this way, eternal life.

Come, I will show you.

With these supersonic and electronic devices, I shall bring this prehistoric

to life, or vice versa. Watch.

Relax, I have perfect control.

Hold.

We have a million more zombies just like him. An army of those monsters could

destroy the Earth.

Precisely what we are planning.

The ladies are in the far room. They've been informed you are coming and...

Look!

Diamonds, emeralds, rubies.

Hey, that's solid gold.

Oh, yes, we have molten rivers of it in the mountains.

As for me, I'd like to see the ladies.

This way, sir.

you take any diamonds, rubies or emeralds?

Oh, that's good, because we protect them by coating them with a deadly poison.

Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.

I'm Moe, you're for me. Hiya, toots. So you are an Earthman. Yes, ma 'am. What a

terrible specimen.

I thank you. Hey, wait a minute. Come on over and give me a kiss. You'll soon

change your mind.

Wow.

Boy, I've heard of hot lips, but you're a sizzle. We are charged with high

voltage.

Boy, a two -cylinder dynamo.

Hold my sash.

It will immunize you.

Oh, yeah?

It did.

Hi, you beautiful.

Hello.

I brought a gift for you. Our favorite theater nuisance, popcorn, unpopped.

Do I get a kiss?

Mm -hmm.

Wow.

I have a gift for you, too.

A frozen spring chicken, ready to cook.

How about a hug, beautiful?

You're a fat one. I don't think I can get my arms around you. I can get my

around you.

Oh,

it's burnt.

Dinner is ready. You ladies may join us. Oh, boy, dinner.

Professor Jones, now that you know our secret, we shall turn you and your men

into zombies.

Boy, am I starved. Help yourself.

Clams, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy.

Hey,

there's nothing in them. We find them delicious.

What is that? That's not water.

That's battery acid.

We drink it to recharge our batteries.

We do not drink water. It would short our circuit. We'd blow up.

Go on and eat.

No thanks, I'm full. Just before we came up here, I had some nuts and bolts

under glass.

Say, could I have a nice salami sandwich smothered in sour cream with cherry

jelly, pickle in the middle and a mustard on top?

You fools.

This was your last meal.

You will never leave here alive.

Go on and call the guards.

This will short a second.

Oh, there.

There's a lot of them. Light them all.

We need more light.

Hey, Joe, there's something weird about these things. Yeah, I noticed. I turn on

buttons and then anything...

guys. You seeing things?

You guys must be dreaming. I haven't seen anything. Good evening.

You must be devout cowards.

Looks like we got a fight on our hands. Let's give it to him.

Hey, that guy don't even want to fight.

Maybe he's got the professor in that room. Let's get him. Yeah.

Door's locked. I think I'll try my keys.

What are you guys panting about? I'm doing all the work.

Stop snorting down my neck, Larry.

Joe, you better take a little bicarbonate of soda.

These keys won't work on this door.

Maybe the professor's in that room. Come on.

We'll find him.

Hey, wait a minute.

We can't go in that room. The goon is in there.

General motorcycle, 17 and a half. And a can of pound of steel, 25 and a

quarter. Simmers Incorporated, 17.

Go on, untie him.

Take it easy. This was awful.

Take it easy, Professor.

There we are. Oh, dear.

I'm sorry I came. That's all right.

Let's go.

We must destroy this device so they can never use it again. Help me.

Here. Okay, boys.

This is our golden opportunity.

Now, don't go away.

Oh, Moe, I'm so sorry.

Oh, think nothing of it, stout fellow.

Skinny rat.

Let's get out of here.

Hurry. Let's get out of here. Come on. Hurry. Come on. Let's go.

Let's go before they take after us.

So we jumped into our spaceship and zoomed back to Earth.

And that's the end of the bedtime story.

Now go to sleep.

Yeah. Now we're going out to dinner. And the babysitter will be here any minute.