All language subtitles for Simon & Simon s01e07 The Hottest Ticket in Town

Miss Allen, I'm here to pick you up.
You're new, aren't you?

Yes, sir, I'm new.

Can I take a suitcase and put it in the
trunk for you? No, no, I'll keep it with

me. Yes, sir.

We're going to the Bay Arena, right?

We're not going anywhere until you give
me that suitcase.

Come on, give.

I think I killed him.

There's that new kid in homeroom. Look
at her.

Miss Howard found 1982.

You guys are laughing, but at least
she's going to get a ticket.

We'll have to listen from the parking
lot.

Right. I don't think this line has an
in.

Maybe you could do something about that.

Go on up to her and flash those big blue
surfboard eyes.

Remember? Algebra 2?

Yeah, sure.

Hi, I'm Diane Pierce.

I guess you've been in line a while.

Yeah, all night.

Must have been pretty cold.

Cold? I'm from Wisconsin.

Anything above 20 is top -down weather.

So, you like it here in San Diego?

Yeah.

Listen, if you want me to buy you
tickets when it's my turn, just ask.

Who thought up this little game, heckle
and jekle?

Hey, don't do me any favors, okay?

I'm just trying to be friendly.

Yeah.

Give me the money.

For them, too.

Thanks. Maybe I can see it and I can
pick them up.

You and algebra.

You've ever wondered what I feel inside.

Secrets I keep to myself.

It's all very simple.

I've nothing to hide.

It's you that I want. No one else. I
want you.

And nobody else I want.

Two.

Uncle Rick and your Uncle AJ can get you
tickets.

Mom. What?

That's okay.

I don't care about Rick Brewster anyway.

I can tell.

You don't care about Rick Brewster the
same way AJ didn't care about the Surf

Boys. Beach Boys, Mom. Beach Boys.

You should see the pile of albums I gave
to Goodwill last week.

Oh, no.

Not Surf and Safari, Mom. Please, not
Surf and Safari.

Oh, I don't know.

Well, I remember one record with a
picture of a black man in a cowboy

the cover. Oh, Mom, Bo Diddley is a
gunslinger. Mom, you didn't do that.

I'm sure going to this concert isn't
that important to Diane.

All right, Mom, you made your point.

She promised three of the kids at her
new school she'd get them tickets, too.

We will do what we can, but we can't
promise anything.

Of course they can.

How well do you know Jim Bob Raymond,
anyway?

Jim Bob?

Never met him.

Well, then would you mind telling me
what we're doing here?

We need tickets. He's promoting a
concert. That's easy.

Twisted logic is never easy. I'll see
you.

Easy, son. The roller derby don't start
till April.

Let me have this.

Mr. Raymond.

I am Rick Simon. That's my brother, A
.J. We've been admiring your shows for

years. That's nice. Now, if you boys
will just excuse me. I just wanted to

you know that I grew up on your
wrestling matches.

Taught me the meaning of fair play.
Look, buddy, don't stroke a stroker.

tell me what you want or get out of my
way. That's fair enough. That's fair

enough. Now, we're here to talk to you
about a little trade.

A little trade?

What are you talking about?

Tickets for the Rick Brewster concert.

Get out.

Uh, no, now look, see, this is really a
sweet deal here.

Uh, you do this for us, and then any
time you want it, we return the favor.

And, uh, I got quite a few connections
around town, you know what I mean? How

would you like to connect with this?

Call security?

No, now look, see, I'm not talking about
freebies here, I'm talking about an

opportunity!

Was elegant.

Oh, I like your style.

Leave me, Dr.

Carr. Maybe you'll take it, Mark.

Jim Bob Productions.

Thank you.

Jerks.

Cute jerks, though.

Hmm. We're announcing in Muro.

They called and they're on the way in,
and they sounded pretty upset.

Said you ought to read page three of the
morning paper.

I don't think I can deal with Gordy on
an empty stomach.

Oh, come on. You know it'll be worth it.
He always comes through for us.

Peace.

Saddle up. Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.

Terrific shirt.

Hey, Rico and AJ.

Who's Norm?

How should I know?

But did you see the crossed wrenches on
the back?

And feel me. Go ahead, touch me. I'm
authentic Pollyanna. That's really first

cabin, Gordo.

Listen, man, we're interested in scoring
some tickets.

Tickets? The man wants tickets?

Tickets, tickets.

Tickets. You fill in the airlines and
the destination.

No. They're not hot. We don't want
airline tickets.

Chargers tickets.

No, what we want is tickets. No, what we
want is tickets.

What we want is tickets to the Rick
Brewster concert.

Heavy.

You know, it's strange.

Normal channels, they got nothing.

Try it up. It's weird.

I've never seen anything like it.

Hey, Tuesday, we launched the forest.

Anchors away, my boy. That is beautiful.

Anchors away. Can you help us, Gordy? I
questioned myself with one of those

champagne miniatures. You know the
little bottles you get on the airlines?

I was crying.

Tickets? And then I went out to cop some
decals for my new P -38. Remember the

lightning with the twin tail? Oh, yeah.
This stuff is wonderful. Ray, you got

tickets?

Okay, okay.

I heard about some tickets.

See? I just think you shouldn't book
passage on this particular guy's

Why's that?

I don't know the guy. He's a friend of a
friend. But from the way he is talking,

something very weird is going down. I
mean, this guy is moving hundreds at 50

bucks a hit.

Much too big an apple for this little
worm.

Well, Gordy, could you maybe just let us
know how to get in touch with him?

We'll take it from there.

Here's a name and an address.

You didn't get it from me. Oh, Gordy,
you're a champion.

But it is. All right. Hey, will you look
at this stuff? Come on, can you believe

this screaming eagle? Look at that. Oh,
that's gorgeous.

And it's got bombs clutched in its
talons. See you later, Gordy. Take it

all right?

Jeez.

You read it?

Damn well right I read it. We've been at
the hospital, and Hallard's still in a

coma. Now, the only thing the cops know
is he's a printer from Vegas.

but they don't know who shot him. No,
and they didn't find the suitcase.

Symbol. Whoever it was, they got our
tickets.

They got my tickets.

A quarter of a million dollars of my
money. They've got to start servicing in

quantity. I mean 8 ,000 seats.

Well, maybe the police will turn them
up.

Oh, well, wouldn't that be nice?

8 ,000 tickets that are not supposed to
exist.

You want to try explaining that to the
cops if they find them?

Stupid.

I want you guys to start rattling every
cage in town.

There's got to be somebody with an awful
lot of Brewster tickets to unload.

Somebody with... Wait a minute.

Wait a minute. What did I do with that
card?

Now I know what that jerk was talking
about.

What jerk?

This jerk, Richard Simon.

He came in here this morning talking
about sweet deals and opportunities.

Hell, I thought he wanted tickets.

He must have been trying to sell them
back to you.

You got the address.

Now you go find him.

And then you find those tickets.

And when you do, you buy him a ticket to
the same hospital that Hallard's in.

Hi,

anything for Simon and Simon?

Thank you, but...

Wonderful.

Well, at least we didn't have any bills.

Nelson, those are the two guys we're
looking for.

20 ,000, man, and that's a righteous
price for 200 tickets.

Okay, okay, 15 ,000, and that's the
bottom line.

10, and you're killing me.

I'll be right over.

This is crazy.

I'm staring murder one in the face and
you're getting rid of these one at a

time. Jim Bob's going to be looking
under every rock in town. Let's get out

here while we can still walk. Calm down,
will you?

You're hyperventilating.

Look, we'll unload all of them. Just be
cool.

Guy's not even dead.

Great. Great, stay cool.

These tickets can only send me away for
life when you're calling everybody and

his mother. Why don't you put an ad in
the newspaper?

Hey, I didn't tell you to shoot the guy.

Look, I'll be back in half an hour.

Relax.

We're going to be rich.

Hey, Al.

Maybe we should go to Mexico.

That's what we should do.

Sure.

I'd like to don't expect you to come out
real hard.

We want to talk to you about some
tickets.

Hey, you all right?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Boy, Gordy really called it. Something
weird is going on here.

Look at this. They're all for Rick
Brewster.

Yeah, I know.

No, Rick.

No. God put these here for us. Rick,
they do not belong to us. Hey, you think

they belong to Little Weasel who left
them here? Huh?

Now, look. We are going to do the right
thing.

We're going to return these to the
rightful owner, Rick Brewster.

We get Diane's ticket for her, we make a
nice little settlement, we get a reward

for ourselves from them, right? We're
going to do the right thing, I promise,

right?

Right.

What's wrong?

Last time I saw that look in your eye, I
got 20 stitches and you were in jail

for a week.

Yeah, well, this time it's going to be
different.

You'll get the stitches, I'll be in
jail.

You're paranoid, you know that? I am not
paranoid.

When it comes to my life, I am
occasionally cautious.

Cautious, paranoid, same difference.

Rick, your dictionary has a few pages
missing.

Paranoid.

Paranoid.

Hold it, Nelson.

We know where to find him.

Let's check that house out first.

us long to catch up with him.

Believe me, we're going to get the
tickets and take care of those two guys

you.

Hi there.

They should be back any minute. Oh, hi.
Thanks. I know.

They told me to meet him here after
school.

You must be Dee. You must be Janet. I
have heard a lot about you. I've heard

about you, too.

What are you reading?

Conrad. That's got to be for English,
right?

No, it's just for fun.

You know, I don't think Francis Coppola
really understood it.

Oh, they're smiling, and that's always
dangerous.

Look at that.

Hey.

Huh? I would be willing to treat the
entire student body.

But A .J. there wants to play right down
the middle.

You wait right here, and we may have an
even bigger surprise for you.

Don't ask me.

No, you don't understand.

I'm not a Rick Brewster fan.

I just, I need to talk to him
personally, or to his manager, the hotel

Well, then put me through to his room.
I'll talk to anyone.

I do not sound like a high school
junior.

Hello?

Hello?

You never wonder what I feel inside.

Secrets I keep to myself.

It's all very simple.

I've nothing to hide.

It's you that I want. No one else.

I wanted to tell you, and God knows I've
tried.

My feelings are hard to conceal.

You never know, cause girl I can try.

Act up too high.

One to a hundred.

A, B, one to a hundred.

B, B, want B.

Double C, one to a hundred. Baby, baby,
one to a hundred.

Hey, Healy, man, we need to crank up the
sound.

Sure, you got it.

Okay. Ricky, something weird's going
down, man. A guy just called and said

got a few thousand tickets he wants to
give to you.

Personally. A few thousand?

Yeah. So I asked him the seat numbers.

This is only one problem.

The seats don't exist.

for rick and aj they're inside they're
inside sure shouldn't they be

do you have an appointment with them oh
yeah they sure do hey let

go of me hi oh uh look i think

there's some sort of misunderstanding
here quiet uh yeah but i think you

probably

Curiosity, uh, what's the deal with the
tickets? Just curious.

What tickets?

Let's go.

Hey, I don't know what's going on, but
she's got nothing to do with it.

Leave her alone.

Compliments of Jim Bob Raymond.

No, you didn't.

Time to get up.

Come on.

Up you go.

You okay?

Huh?

Hey, you're okay.

Where's D?

What? Is that in my head?

It's in my head.

It's easy for you to say.

Did they hurt you? No.

Ow! Get that away from me.

It'll stop the swelling.

I'm not worried about swelling. I'm
worried about seeing.

Eight fingers is normal, right?

For you, yes.

Ow! Sorry.

Do you guys always get beat up like
this?

Your mother calling you.

Phone hasn't run since I got here.

Well, how many real clients do you guys
have?

No more surprises.

You two want to talk to Rick Brewster
about some tickets?

Well, come on in, officers.

I see you brought some friends.

We've got enough here to play bridge,
don't we? Yeah, whoever decided to call

Rick Brewster can be the dummy.

Hey, which one of you called us?

Well, um, I did.

But, uh, you don't understand. We didn't
steal any tickets. We're just trying to

return some tickets to Mr. Brewster.

Fearless detectives.

Hello? Hey, what are you talking about,
pal? Don't exist. We saw him. Yeah,

well, if we see any of them at the
concert, you two are going to spend a

long time in jail.

Jail? For what?

You heard the man. You're under arrest.

Under arrest for what?

Suspicion.

Suspicion of what? Suspicion of
conspiracy.

Conspiracy to do what?

Suspicion of conspiracy to commit a
felony. What felony?

Fraud, extortion, forgery. Oh, man, this
is ridiculous. We can explain all of

that.

Okay. Go ahead.

You do it.

This is our cousin Diane, and she just
moved into town, right?

Now, because she's new in school, she
wants to make a good impression on her

classmates, so she stayed in line all
night long trying to get tickets to the

Rick Brewster concert.

But when she got to the window, they
were sold out. Of course they were all

out. Rick Brewster's the hottest act in
rock and roll.

Right. Come on. So, uh, her aunt, that's
our mother, right? Her mother's sister.

It's me, kid. Could you keep it down,
please?

Well, Mr. Bridge, I have to tell you, it
really is a thrill to meet you in

person like this. It's a thrill for me,
too. Look, I really do have to go. But

could I at least have your autograph?

Could you write to my fan club?

I got 12 people on salary that do
nothing but sign my autograph for me.

really do have to rehearse.

It's another big one. We owe Janet. It
certainly is.

You! Mister!

Freeze!

Daddy?

Oh.

I'm sorry. I'm so embarrassed I could
just... This is my father.

Anybody asks, I'll just say you two got
an effective pair.

Well, are they all there?

Too unadmitted.

All right.

Get on the phone. Make sure our orders
are still firm.

Tell everybody we'll be delivering
tonight.

Tell me something.

Have you ever heard of somebody scalping
tickets?

For a concert. For seats that didn't
exist.

I knew a guy once who was selling
tickets for a concert that didn't exist.

You know, if you just wanted to get
through the gate, you could print up a

counterfeits. I'm not talking about a
few. I'm talking about a few thousand.

Gee, and you're going to be stuck with a
few thousand people wandering around

expecting to have seats.

I mean, people pay for seats. You're not
going to settle for sitting on the

floor, you know. It'd be a riot. Yeah,
and then some.

What other seats are there?

Hey, now, that would be really heavy. I
mean...

First the seats aren't there, then they
are there, then they aren't there. No,

the seats have got to be there. I mean,
it's 8 ,000 tickets, four performances,

that's 2 ,000 extra seats per
performance. How many seats does the Bay

hold? 15 ,000.

So who's going to know the difference
between 15 ,000 and 17 ,000? It's

basically like Rick Brewster, that's for
sure.

What if those tickets are already on the
street?

We'll have to leave the country. But
before we go, there's someone I want to

have a talk with.

Who's that?

Oh.

The great Gordini strikes again. What
can I say?

This is a good time to talk to him.

Maybe we ought to wait in his office and
surprise him.

I feel inside.

Secrets I keep to myself.

It's all very simple.

I've nothing to hide.

To you that I want, no one else.

I want you.

And nobody else.

My feelings are hard to conceal.

You never know this, cause girl I could
try.

Act tough to hide.

All right, 350 seats.

Look, if you don't want them, Eddie,
there's other guys that will... Okay,

tonight.

Outside the arena in about an hour.

Okay,

everybody, man, it's sounding great.

Let's get ready for a full rehearsal and
do it, man.

Hey, I want to know what's going on,
man. The contract says 15 ,000 paid

admissions. Now, how the hell are there
supposed to be thousands of tickets on

sale for seats that don't exist?

Well, Willie, I don't really think it's
that difficult to figure out. Maybe I'm

a little slow.

Why don't you spell it out for me? I'd
be happy to.

Rick Brewster stands up on that stage
and makes an ass out of himself in front

of 15 ,000 kids that don't know any
better. But people like you and me, we

this possible.

And I don't think we get our fair share.

Now, your rock singer's not going to
know the difference if there's a few

seats in the hall, is he? A few?

2 ,000 per show.

Now, Willie, the reason I'm telling you
this is because I like you and I'm going

to split with you. But that jerk
Brewster don't need to know. Hey, that

a friend of mine, man. And we worked a
long time to get where we are now. And

you think a great... Did I say you had
any choice?

How's that?

Not bad for a sucker punch.

Ah!

Well,

he's going to need that. I put it back,
but I... You set the suitcase?

Oh, I've had it with this guy. Hold it!

First things first.

Our friend Willie here is very concerned
about the overhead lights. He's going

to have to get up on the catwalk and
check them out.

I told him to be very careful.

Yeah.

It's real dangerous up there.

The man could have an accident, for
sure.

Do it as quick as possible.

Reel them the doors in an hour.

Keep them here until the show starts.

Then take them out through the bay.

All the wasted motion I put into loving
you

The promises all broken And all the
dreams that

won't come true This is our last goodbye
This is

our last goodbye

Make you change.

I thought I could, but I'm learning.

Swear to me you're changing, girl.

But I'm all out of trying.

Now, come on, put that down. Sit down.

Hey, hey, hey, don't get nervous. You
got the gun, remember?

Now, sit down.

What are you going to do? You going to
shoot me and get blood all over Jim

carpet, huh?

Yeah.

Now, sit down.

Catch it.

Thought you were going to fool me on
that one, didn't you?

Can't fool the old bot.

You know, it's only rock and roll, but I
really think we ought to make an effort

to save Mr. Hogue.

Okay, you go down and get all those
people off the stage. I'll go up top and

take care of that, okay?

Okay.

Thank you.

We roll and roll.

You all right?

Yeah.

It's only rock and roll, but I love it.

How do you do?

Wonderful.

Hi.

Hi. Oh, hi.

Do you want a malt or anything?

No, thanks.

I figured since you guys worked so hard
to do me a favor, I could do you one.

This is terrific.

Thank you.

There's Bobby. Just a second.

Bobby,

this is my cousin AJ.

Hey. And my cousin Rick. Hi.

Nice to meet you.

Hi, fellas.

Could I speak to you for a second?

Sure.

I was really rotten to you yesterday,
and I'd like to apologize.

Oh, that's okay.

You had a lot on your mind. I did, but
that's still no excuse, so I'm sorry.

That's the house, front row. And there's
the autograph that you asked for.

Does that mean you forgive me?

What?

I'll see you tonight after the show.

Yeah, sure.

Bye.

I guess we got tickets after all.

These three are for you.

Thanks.

Hey, since you went to so much trouble,
maybe we ought to go together.

Then we could, you know, talk to each
other in between songs.

Okay.

Listen, you want me to walk you home?

Uh, yeah.

Listen. Yeah.

You think you could do something about
the Rolling Stones concert?

Come on, let's go.

You and I know the meaning of amigo.

We're not alike.

Yet everybody we know Knows we're more
than brothers We're best of friends

We may not look or think like one
another

And there are times when we have hurt
each other Still we're more than

We're best of friends