All language subtitles for Mind.Your.Business.S01E05.Double.Booked.720p.WEB.h264-NoRBiT_track1_[eng]

[Distant Conversation]

[Grunting]

- Get the door baby.
- I got you, I got you.

- Oo, oo.
- Ah.

- Watch your step.
- Okay--ah.

Can you believe that June bug
just gon' fly in my face?

- Right in the middle
of my back swing?
- Whew, the nerve.

- And then Jeff talkin' 'bout,
"We counting all the strokes,
we counting all the strokes."

- I almost swung on him.
- Mhm, mhm.

- Okay baby, slow down.
- As opposed to what?

- Oh? Okay.
- Kimberly...

[Grunts]
- Ooh.

Are you sure this is from golf?

I mean they say you carry
your financial stress
in your lower back.

- Okay, well if that's the case
then I am definitely

will need a wheelchair.

- I only buy what I need.

- Which means everything?

- Okay, you are definitely
staying here tonight.

- No, no, no.
This event is too big,

and it's too important.
I can't.

- Ow.
- Yeah, see?

- Why you hit me in the face?

- You can't even catch a pillow.
- Oh, my back.

- You are in no shape
to go to work Mr. Williams.

- You know what, mm-mm.

I'm pretty sure nobody at work

is gonna be throwing
pillows at me.

- Baby, you are staying here.

I can fill in at work for you
in your absence.

It's a family business
after all.

- Yeah I guess,
I guess you're right.

- I know I am.
And the Bulls
are playing tonight.

- True.

But baby I can't trust
Aaliyah and Mia to run
that event.

- It's too important.
- Baby, I understand.

Let me be your eyes and ears,
okay?

Just stay home and relax
and watch the game.

The kids are away,
you have the house to yourself.

There's nobody here
to bother you.

- Whew, good point, good point.
[Revving in Distance]

- Inside here.

- What are you doing?

- I had so much fun today.

- Girl, wait until you meet
our other girlfriend Jackie.

She is a hoot!
You'll love her.

- Can't wait.
[Cackling]

- Hey nephew!
- Hey.

- Come meet
my new friend Mildred.

I met her
on my afternoon stroll.

- Decided to bring her over huh?
- She just means
her afternoon nap honey.

I caught her sleepin'
on the park bench.

- Now how we gon' be friends,
you gon' tell all my business?

- I'm sorry.

- Oh wow, you got
a handshake already.
Nice to meet you Mildred.

- You too.
- Okay, alright.

- What are we watching?

- We ain't watching
nothing, okay?

I'm watching the game.

- Lucille...I love basketball.
- Huh?

- All them handsome men
running around covered
in them tats

and just flexing.

They can dunk in my basket
anytime.

[Hollering]
- Oh, whoa, whoa.

- Ha, oh.
- Dunk in my basket!

- Two points, whoo!
- Anytime!

- Oh Lord.
- Okay.

Oh, do you mind if
we change it to the WNBA game?

My grand niece plays
for the Chicago Sky's.

- Really?
- What? What? Say what?

What? No, I do mind.

- No he don't.
It's on commercial anyway.

And when did you start
relaxing watching TV?

Ever since I've moved in here
all you've done is work.

- Uh, mucho trabajo,
poquito dinero, okay?

- Oo!
- I work hard, and today,

I had a tragic back injury,

so I'm letting Kim
run the event,

and I was just hoping
I could just chill.

- Oh.
- You know,
I'm gonna just chill.

- Well, hablo Español |
un poquito solamente.

You hurt your back?
How'd that happen?

- Uh, uh, saving a girl
from a burning building.
You know.

Burning building.
She fell, I caught her.

- Now, you know, yep,
but she's home now, she's safe.
- Oh my word.

- Uh, you know, I'm not a hero.

I don't need applause,
I don't need any of that.

No accolades, you know--

- No, you are not a hero.
You a liar is what you are.

'Cause I know the only way
you hurt yourself

was tryna play golf.

Mildred look, he still
holding the club.

- You know what sweetheart,
let me tell ya',

some folks are just
prone to injury.

You better be careful watching
TV, you might hurt your eye.

[Laughing]

- Girl! Mildred you so funny.

You are the funniest girl!
[Wheezing]

Every time you open your mouth
something funny fall out.

Hurt your eyes.

- Hurt your eyes!
- Okay, alright, okay.

Destiny's Nanas.

I'm gonna leave y'all to it.

- No, don't go.
- You can enjoy the game.

- Don't go!
- And I'm gonna go upstairs
and watch the game in my room.

[Back Cracking]
- Oo, oo!

Nephew...

- Now you not moving so well.
- No, I'm fine. I'm fine.

- I'm fine.
- No you not.

- I'm call your father.
He'll know what to do.
- Mm-mm! Mm-mm!

- There you go, there you go.

- Oo, girl...
- Right there.

- Remember when you kissed
Joseph Lewis in the 8th grade?

- Oh, yes and I thought
I contracted his lisp!

- What was I thinking?
- You was trippin'.

- I was.
- But um,

he hit me in my DMs last night.

- Girl you lyin'.
- Girl, he ain't ugly no more.

- Let me see, let me see.

- Mm.
- Oo! That's him?

- Girl yes!
- Girl!

- Now I know you ain't trippin'
if I'm picking up
what he putting down?

- Uh, well if you don't mind
picking up his six kids.

- Did you say six?

- He got a whole clan girl.
- Oh no we gon'--delete.

- Delete, ugh.
- Mm-hmm.

- Yeah.
- I'm good on that.

- (singsongy) Hello.
- Oo.
- Okay.

Look like Stella done got
her groove all the way back.

- Yes girl, you done
brought them hips
out of hibernation.

- Uh, do they lie?

- Girl they do not.

- Let me see, it's uh...
Hermes?

- Vintage Hermes?
- Yes.

- Circa 1988?

- Uh, Ross, back rack,
circa $19 and 99 cents.

- Honey, I love a good sale.
- You telling me.

- Girl, you look so good
I forgot you married
my cheap twin.

- Ugh, what can I say.

- If he the cheap twin,
does that make you
the broke twin?

- Uh, that's not a thing.
- Oh.

- Yeah, it's only a pretty twin
and an ugly twin,

and we know which one I am.

- Yes we do.

- 'Cause he is for sure
the ugly attitude, ugly face,
ugly head, all of it.
- Ugly, ugly.

- Speaking of Alfonso,
where is he?

We need some help around here.

- He hurt his back
playing golf.

So I'm just here to help
in his place.

Now look, this is what
I'm thinking.

We can add some balloons
over here.

And 'szoosh' this up
a little over here.

And put a little banner
across there.

[Kimberly Continues]
- You gon' tell her
before I do?

- And a pop of that goes right--
- Aye, Kimberly.

No disrespect but um,
if you're Alfonso,

then your domain
is in the office, yeah.

You gon' be crunching
some numbers, planning events.

- Things like that.
- Okay.

- [Delivery Man] Delivery from
Burns Funeral Home,
looking for Alfonso Williams.

- That would be you.
- Oh right, right, right.

Coming!

In my Alfonso voice.
(deeply) Coming.

- Okay. You better walk.
- Mhm.

- But didn't they say
funeral home?

- I hope that's the family name.
- They got the wrong place.

- You don't look
like Alfonso, but

I just need someone
to sign for the ashes.

- Oh, that's what the kids are
calling it now, "the ashes."

Where do I sign
for your fine ass?

- These are interesting
decorations, right?

- These look like urns.
- Yeah.

- Yeah, they are.
There's four urns.

- One for each of his children.
- Oh.

- Is this a joke?

- No, Jaimie James is having
her birthday party here.

- And she just turned 25.

- Well, I feel a spirit,
yes I do, uh-huh.

I can feel her spirit
all around us.

It ain't him, he's dead inside.

Oo, but he cute on the outside.

- Well Jaimie Jones is having
his services here at six.

Now can I unload
the family's belongings?

- What services?

- We're having a memorial
service here at six?
- I didn't book it.

- Is anybody even listening
to me?
- I am.

- We're double booked.

- How did this happen?
- You tell us Alfonso.

- 93-11, call me.

What, what is this for?

- Girl ya' thirsty.
- Yes I am.

- I hate to say it Alfonso,
but I think we need
to call Alfonso.

- Aaliyah, do you think you can
use your super twin power

to tap into his thoughts
right now?
- Mm-mm.

I stopped doing
that after puberty, no.

And we can figure
this out y'all.

- No, I think Mia's right.

- No, no, no, we are three
strong, independent,
smart women.

Okay, we do not need a man
to help us solve our problems.

Okay, like Beyonce said,
who runs the world?

[In Unison] Girls.

- She's right, let's prove
that we can handle this.
- Yes.

- Yes.
- Yes!
- Okay.

- Alright, so a birthday party
usually takes all night,

but a memorial, what is it?
A song, a speech, a poem?

- And then we out.
- Yes, yes, exactly.

Limit expressions to one minute.

No shoutouts, or sunglasses,

and cry before you get
to the podium.

- Oo, yes.
- That's good, that's good.

- And no matter what,
these people cannot
find out about each other

'cause if they do,
oh my God, they could leave us
a bad review.

- No, no, no, that's not good,
can't do that.

- Oh, oh, game time.
- You got this!

- G-g-get your back against
the wall, you know the drill man
come on now.

Where your ID at?
Where it's at, come on!

Get in the party, game time!

Oh! The Henny girl,
save me a shot later.

- Okay, gon' to the right.
- Hey.

- Yes girl.

[Dramatic Sobbing]

- Oh, he was a good man.
He was such a good man.

I know.

what is you doin' fool?
This ain't no club.

- Y'all ain't got no security?

- Sir, this is
a treasured institution

loved and respected by all.

- Y'all trippin',
this is Chicago.

- Get in there boy.
- I got robbed on my way
over here.

- Hello my prayer warriors.

Mm, I'm Reverend Elroy Jenkins.

I'll be hosting the memorial
service this evening.

Now, did I hear someone say

something about some uh, Henny?

- Oh, no, no, no,
you heard serenity.

God, Lord, grant me the serenity

to accept the things
that I cannot change.

The courage...

(uncertain) to change the things
that I can?

- (whispering) Wisdom.
- And the wisdom
to know the difference.

- Difference!
- Whew, preach honey.

- Well, I'm still gonna
need a little taste.

Wine goes down fine,
but they say dark liquor,

hits a little quicker.

- Okay.

- Whew, yes!
[Women Cackling]

- Where's my boy?

Dad's here.

- Pops, I'm fine.

- Oh, no, no, no,
I promised your mama
before she passed,

God rest her soul,

I'd never abandon you.

I'm by your side
in times of need--

- Is that the game?
- Yeah! It just started.

- Before you sit down,
can you get me a beer?

- You heard that sis?

His back ain't got nothing
to do with his feet.

- Just lazy.
- Lazy.

- Hm?
- That's your brother?

- Ugh.

- So how you know Jaimie?

- We met last night.

- He came to you?

Do you feel him now?

(whispering) Is he here?

- She is over there.

- Hey! Spirits are everywhere.

I think I see one
eating on the meatballs.

Go taste 'em, they are delicious
girl, go, go.

- Whew, this is working.

- Memorial guests aren't
wearing black.

I'm having a hard time
figuring out who's here
for what.

Like this guy.

- Girl, he is here
for the memorial.

- How can you tell?

- because, all these gorgeous
women in here, and he ain't
doing the two-step cackle.

- What is the two-step cackle?

- You know,
(singsongy) babygirl, babygirl.

(whispering) Take him
to the memorial.

[Whispering Under Breath]

- Um, excuse me aunty,

I'm a little too old
to be drinking Long Island.

We're supposed to be
popping bottles.
[Noises of Excitement]

- Girl, please.

You ain't getting no
championship ring
for turning 25.

Turn 40 with no kids
and be happy,

then come and get with me,
okay.
[Cackling]

- Oh, that's so miserable.

- What Mia meant to say
is we'll check.

- Go sweetie, it's your
birthday.
- Okay. [Giggling]

- Did she just call
me miserable?

I know miss la piñata
ain't call me miserable.

- What is you doing?
- I will fight.

- Come on now, that's a foul!

- Auntie, he didn't
even touch it.

- Aye listen, you respect
your elders.

I said that's a foul
and that's that!

- Well lookie here
at what I did.

I made lemon pepper
chicken wings,

loaded potato skins,
and uh, french fries.

- Oo.
- Mildred.

- I'm gon' have to get
with you girl.
- You did all that
in my kitchen?

- You know what Henry,
I do have three extra bedrooms.

But fair warning,

I'm a nudist.

- Oh, I think I like you
Mildred.

Let me see if I like your wings.

- Ah, ah, ah,
did you wash your hands?
[Doorbell Rings]

Here, use a napkin or something.
[Doorbell Rings]

- Pop, can you get that?

- Something wrong
with your voice, boy?

It's open!

- Hey everyone, I'm Jessie.

That's my husband, Scott.

You must be Kimberly's husband--
-No! No.

No, no.

Even though people may say

I look like I'm in my 40s,
it's that alkaline water.
- Mhm.

- Mm, it's working.

Oo!

- How can I help you boys?

- Oh, well we actually moved in
a couple weeks ago

and Kim was nice enough
to let us borrow some...

is that the game?

- Oh, yeah yeah, but we just,
as a family,
we watching family wire.

- Cable guy hasn't come yet,
he's been going crazy not
being able to watch the game.

- You guys want something
to drink?

[In Unison] Oh, yes please.
- Double, tequila.

- You might as well sit down.
Mildred made us some snacks.

- Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

You can have a seat.

- I prefer to cuddle anyways,
come here pook-kay.

- Catch.

- Darn it!
- Go man.

- Whoo!
- Wh-where's my drink pop?

- It's your back
that's hurting, right?

You need yoga, not spirits.

Unless you talking 'bout
the Holy Spirit.

- Mm.

Yes Lord.

- What you talking 'bout?

- Okay God,
grant me the serenity,

to accept the things
that I cannot change.

- We're gathered here today

to bid farewell to Jaimie Jones.

A man who's the life
of every party.

And that is why he insisted

not to wear black.

As you can see,

not everyone got the memo.

Now, let us bow our heads
in prayer.

Father God--

[In Unison] Go Jaimie!
It's your birth--memorial.

- Too soon?
We'll be back.
- Sorry.

- God bless you.
- Leave the champagne.

Uh, praise to God, amen.

Lovely.

As I was saying Lord God...

- I think I figured it out.

Memorial guests in the lobby,
birthday in here.

- Wait, you didn't think
to tell us that?

- I couldn't leave my post.

- Is that an urn?

[Aaliyah] Okay,
if that breaks, we are done for.
- Allow me.

- I speak Gen-Z.
- Okay, okay.

- Hey girl, hey!

This party is so dope.

- Bussin', she mean bussin'.

- Yes! It's the decorations
for me honey.

[Mock Laughing]

- Y'all wanna play a game?
- Yes!

- Let me hold that while
you play.
- Uh-uh, that's the game.

- If I throw you the vase
and you catch it,

you take a shot.

- What about the champagne?

- Champagne.
- Champagne, yes.

- We only booked this place
for six hours.

We tryna turn up, right?

Champagne was taking too long.

- Well, what if we
don't catch it?

- No, that's not an option.

- You get it.

- You ready?
- (hesitantly) Yes.

- Okay...

- Whoo!

[Jenkins] Oh, Sister Kimberly.
- Oh what?

Yes, yes?

- Praise God.

Is there another room
I could go to watch the game?

- Praise God?
- No, no, sorry.

Not another room.

- Oh, one more thing.
- Praise God?

- No, there should be two
other urns.

- I will return
with those shortly.

- Mhm.
- You know,

I'd like to say a few words
about Jaimie.

Okay, everyone please
grab a glass,

so we can make a toast.

Auntie, hand 'em out.

Jaimie, Jaimie, Jaimie, Jaimie,

you are my best friend

and I couldn't be more excited
to share this special day
with you.

We've had our tough times.

Like um, like when you
slept with my boyfriend.

- Oo! Some tea.

- You think I forgot
about that Jaimie? Huh? Huh?

So, so, what, you think you're
just gonna get away
with that Jaimie?

- Is that Denzel Washington's
son I see outside.

- Hold on.
- [Jenkins] They say he
may be coming?

- Uh-huh, I think so.

- I wanna see
Denzel Washington--
- Girl, this is the quickest way
to see him, let's go.

Praise Him!

[Upbeat Music]

The Reverend is asking
for his urns, two are missing.

- Well tell him to work harder,
so he can "earn" it.

[Groans]
- Oh my--
-We gotta focus.

- Okay, um...
- Let's think.

[Overlapped Muttering]

[Rhythmically Chanting "Jaimie"]

- Hold up,

- Reverend Jenkins?
- Jaimie James?

- What are you doing
at my party?

- Party? I'm hosting a memorial
here for Jaimie Jones.

These are the friends and family
of the deceased.

- We can explain.

Mia. Mia!

- Explain.
- I ain't no snitch.

- Um, so, we accidentally
double booked the space.

- Lord have mercy.
- Jaimie James, Jaimie Jones.

Blame the parents.
[Yelling]

[Overlapped Distressed Mutters]

- Oh, oh my God.
- Let's pray.

- Don't cry, don't cry.

It's okay, it's okay.
We'll refund your money,
just don't leave a bad review.

- Please support Black business,
y'all, come on now,
come on now.

- To be honest...

this is the best birthday
I've ever had.

This party kills, ah!

[Laughter]

- Thank you.

- Jaimie was a wild
and wonderful soul.

[Hollering]
- Oh, he done caught
Jaimie spirit.

Wait a minute,
he done caught the spirit.

- Who taught us all

the value of living life
to the fullest.

I'm sure he would've
been honored

to share his space
with another
celebration of life.

- Yes.
- Oh, yes.

- I don't know
about this floor though.

- Oh, I got it, I got it.
- That's how you get ashy feet.

- Cue the music!

- Oh, I can't believe this!

- Just a game, honey.

- Don't start.
We're in front of company,
we talked about this.

- This is a safe space.

If we can't deal with our issues
in front of our neighbors,
where can we deal with them?

- Well, it's my space,
and you know uh,

you know, we like to listen
through the walls mostly--

- I told you, if you come at me
at a ten,

I'm gonna finish it
at a twelve.
- Okay, that's enough.

[Overlapped Arguing]

[Blows Whistle]
- That's enough.

- Henry, go get the gloves.

- And you know what,
I'm gonna make some popcorn.

- Everybody good
with extra butter?
- Hell yeah.

[Bickering Continues]
- Fellas, that's enough!

Mm-mm. Y'all not gon' do this
in my house.

Not today.

This was supposed to be my day

to rest, relax, and recover.

And y'all come in here
invading my space.

I don't want 'cha.
I don't want 'cha.

I don't want 'cha,
I don't want 'cha,
I don't want 'cha.

I'm sick and tired--

- Oh.
- What happened?
Is it your back?

- Mhm, mhm.
- Oh, oo.

- That's my areola.
We don't touch areolas.

- I'm a chiropractor.

I can adjust you and have you
walking in just a few minutes.

- No, no, no, no
not on my watch.

Last chiropractor I saw
twisted my face

more than my back.
I need to see some reviews.

- Five stars on Yelp.

[Lucille] Oh I look at the Yelp.

Could you look at this first?

- Sure thing.
I love your hair.
- Thank you mister touchy.

- Babe!

- You're walking.
- Oh yeah, oh yeah,
feeling so much better.

Did you know our neighbor
is a chiropractor?

Uh, um, no, I did not know that.

- He snap, crackle, popped
my stuff right back
into position.

Feel fantastic.

- How was the event?
- Oh, it was great.

No issues.

- Really?
That's a first.

- We could really use
an event planner.

- Oh, nah, nah, nah.
Can't afford it.

- My back is already a mess.
- You're right,
'cause I'm not cheap.

- You'll have me in a walker.

- Speaking of walking, shall we?

- Yes we shall, haha.

Now you asked me to do it,
I'm go ahead and take you up--
ah!

(stuttering) Oh, it's coming.

Baby, oh!

Call Jessie, baby, call Jessie.

Just call, go get him,
go get him.

- Two, two houses down.
- Alright.

- Here we go.
- Just call him!

- Jessie!
- Hey Jessie!

Jessie!