Original subtitles

Josh Mullen was terminated

for abusing company resources

to make the following action series.

"Fatal Decision" does not reflect the views

or opinions of SCI technical manuals.

- By the time I realized this bank vault's been robbed,

it was too late.

There was no sign of burglar, a robber, or anybody.

- Huh. Seems obvious to me.

Could you hold my car keys? - Oh, yeah, totally.

- Boom. You're under arrest for robbing your own bank.

- Wait, hold on.

Did you get any strange deliveries today?

- Well, there was a couple of sinister looking guys came by

and dropped off this trippy looking soda machine.

- Huh. - I didn't think much of it.

- Who puts a soda machine in a bank vault?

Boka-Cola, Bepsi, Teleport?

- I don't recognize any of those drinks.

- 'Cause it's not a soda machine. It's a teleporter.

- Whatever it is, it took my dollar.

- 2014 Waterfree Industries.

Dr. Sloan Waterfree must have used it

to teleport into the bank vault and steal all the money.

- But where did he go? - Only one way to find out.

Teleport me, Commander.

Oh, hey. Give me the keys.

Teleport.

- No, no, no, no, No.

We're shooting something right now.

- Oh. - Guys?

I'm Jack Maxwell.

Proud member of several grocery store rewards programs.

If you use modern science to steal things,

you're making a scientifically-accurate

but "Fatal Decision."

- Oh, it's 5 million, 5 million!

- Dr. Sloan Waterfree.

- Congratulations.

You're the second person on earth to teleport their atoms.

- And you're the one millionth person I'm going to kill!

My foot! It's a rabbit's foot.

- Jack, when you went into that teleportation machine,

your atoms merged with your keychain!

Jack, I'm afraid that you have less than 24 hours

until your atoms completely merge with that keychain!

Jack! Jack, are you listening?

Jack?

Jack, are you listening?

- Oh, sorry, I just really wanna get in that doorknob

for some reason.

- Oh.

- Yeah.

- Thing about money is you get it and then you get respect.

Whoa! Hold it right there, Maxwell.

- Damn! You look like death.

- Funny. I was gonna say the same thing about you.

I've got the key to your heart.

Dr. Sloan Waterfree.

- I'm glad you and my industrial magnet

are getting so close.

Excuse me, but I must teleport to my vacation island

where I'm going to enjoy a delicious steak dinner,

courtesy of Sweet Land of Liberty Bank.

- Wait, you can't have steak without pepper.

- My eyes!

- Phew!

Unspliced, and it feels so nice.

Damn it, aren't those the sausages

for the company picnic?

- Yeah, um, I was just gonna pick up some more

on the way home. - Well see,

I don't understand what all this has to do

with the instructional video you're making.

Yeah Josh, when do we get to see

some of this?