Original subtitles

So, Luth and I are officially sponsored skaters now. It's been awesome.

But, Luth, what's the number one rule of being sponsored?

Make sure you don't get unsponsored. Exactly. Which is why we've been busting

our hump, signing autographs.

Number to Riot.

Getting the word out about the company.

Make your next skateboard a Riot skateboard.

They're the best.

Hey, welcome to Don's.

Make your next skateboard a Riot skateboard.

You'll love them.

And even using the Riot Skates t -shirt gun on Thursday. Does anyone want a Riot

t -shirt?

Fire! Fire!

Fire! Fire!

But by far the coolest thing about being sponsored?

Checking out the new skate gear.

Look at helmet walkies. Cool, right? What do you think, Lute?

Lute? Sorry, bro. I'm in the bathroom for a little tinkle time.

Over.

Didn't need to know that, Lute.

Over.

What's that buzzing noise? Over.

Don't

worry,

the wasp is no longer an issue.

Over. Great, Luke.

Over.

Wait, don't tell me. Dude, you won't believe what happened. No, maybe. Don't

forget that I'm...

We'll be right

back.

Lucebib, that's Eddie the Riot Skates rep.

Lucebib, Lucebib.

Welcome to the Riot Skates family.

We're going to do big things with your career.

So, what did you guys think of the helmet walking?

They're cool.

They are cool.

Is this like a new product? Like a skate band? No, this is for me.

I have sweat issues.

Bad sprinkler pits.

Born with them, live with them, I deal with them.

So anyway, next week, Riot Skates is hosting a skate jam at McMillan Skate

We're going to be rolling out the new helmet walkies and a bunch of kick butt

gear. I'm going to need you guys to get on my back so I can carry you to the

top.

Your back's all sweaty.

I don't know you. You will.

Cornelius Jonesworth.

So, Joe, we're talking business here. Oh, I'm all about the business, sir.

I'm what you call a full -service skater.

Street, vert, big air. I'll even bake you a cake. Watch it!

Kid, I like your energy, but I'm going to be working with these guys.

Huh.

Well, if you change your mind, here's my reel.

And now, best in 3 -D.

All right, so anyway, as you know... McMillan Skate Park has one of the best

vert ramps in the area. So I'm going to need you guys to bust out something

really killer.

Wait, wait, wait. If you want to be killed, Zeke can do a 540 McTwist.

Yeah, so Zeke, he's never done the 540 McTwist before, but, you know, we had to

impress Eddie.

So sometimes I like to just say things to put Zeke on the spot.

Why? Because the dude can handle it. Okay, he steps up, he's unstoppable.

Like last week when I told him to do that meatball thing.

Hello, everybody. Zeke is going to do a five bouncer with a meatball.

Onto this here floor.

Like

I

said, unstoppable.

The thing is, Zeke doesn't even know I set him up.

Of course I know Luke sets me up, but I like it. It helps motivate me. Like the

meatball thing.

Are you already told you about that?

Sorry.

No problemo, Eddie. I'll bust that McQuist for you.

Zeke, you got tiger guts, my man, okay? I am sweating here just thinking about

it.

Okay.

So this is the trick.

The watermelon's the vert ramp, and I'm this dude.

Except I'm not missing a hand.

You drop in, come up on the other side, get as much air as possible, do one and

a half turns, still holding onto your board, land.

The reason it's so difficult is the landing. If you don't get it exactly

trust me, you'll end up with more than a face full of melon.

If you want to land correctly, you've got to control the spin.

So this will train me not to get dizzy.

Luce? Spin me as fast as you can. Alright.

Don't worry, brother. Call me the Spin Doctor.

What?

Oh, it sounded clever in my head.

You ready?

Yeah.

Gotta use a camel.

Thanks for the help, Luke.

No sweat, bro.

Let's get it.

Great day to tread.

Where are all these guys watching me while I warm up?

Yeah, I guess word travels fast.

Hey, guys. Come here, come here, come here, come here.

Everybody is dying to sneak a peek at this 540 McTwitch. I know I am, so why

don't you cut me off a slice, huh?

Well, Eddie, I haven't officially done the 540 McTwitch. I'm still working on

the landing.

Hold it.

So you're telling me, no, on me, knucklehead. You're telling me that you

done one yet?

Hello? The skate jam is next week.

Riot Skates has got a lot riding on this. Work my pit.

Your career. My career. I know. It's cool. I got it. Don't worry.

Don't worry.

Even though I was a little unsure about how far forward to lean on the landing,

I wasn't going to let that stop me. Because what's it say on the bottom of

board?

Captain, lean it.

Ginger.

Unstoppable.

You got this.

Are you okay? Bro!

Come on, man.

Come on, bro. Talk to me.

Oh, no, no, bro. Don't leave me, bro.

I'm freaking out.

It's just a dumb shit. Hey, don't touch that.

Luke,

take it easy.

Good. You're awake.

Let's take a look at you.

Does this hurt? Yeah.

About this?

Ow, yeah.

And this? Ow! Stop!

Good. That's what you get for attempting a crazy stunt like that.

That was the worst skateboarding accident I've ever seen.

Thank you. You better check your staff at the door, mister.

You've got abrasions and contusions on 90 % of your body. Spare me the lecture,

doc. Oh, looks like I just caught a large -mouthed sass.

I will sew those lips shut.

Doc, do you mind if I talk to you outside real quick?

What?

Listen. Do you know where to get one of these cool guacamole balls?

In a bedpan.

You and your friend in there are clueless. You don't get it. It's over

He's never skateboarding again.

What?

Doesn't she realize skating is Zeke's entire life?

I mean, telling Zeke he can't skate is like telling a fish it can't swim.

Or a penguin it can't walk, stupid.

How am I going to break the news to the guy?

Luke, I keep playing that trick over and over in my head.

Maybe I didn't lean far enough forward on the landing.

Luke, what's wrong?

Did the doctor say something?

Who? The doctor.

Oh, no, no, the doctor. She told me to fluff your pillows and...

Keep those toes, lube.

That's some nice toes, bro.

Luke, my toes are fine. You're keeping something from me.

What? What are you talking about?

I can always tell when you're hiding something from me because your hair gets

all big and frizzy. That is so not true.

It's humid in here.

Okay, this has nothing to do with the fact that you're never going to skate

again.

Never skate again?

What? You just said I was never going to skate again. Who did?

You did. I did?

Lutz, stop it.

That's crazy. Of course I'm going to skate again.

No, in fact, I'm going to skate right now.

Bro, come on.

No, you don't.

The level with me, Lou.

How's our boy?

He's great.

Yeah, he's never been better.

Man, who am I kidding?

Okay, he's tinkling into a guacamole bowl.

Oh, God.

God.

Breaks my heart.

I was really looking forward to that 540 McTwist.

Yeah. But not to worry.

I'm behind Zeke 100%. Which is why I'm replacing him with only the best.

Wait, you're replacing him?

Who could possibly replace Zeke?

Watch out!

What?

Luther, I'm sure that you know Cornelius Jonesworth, right? He's our new

sponsored skater.

Yeah, yeah, there's no way I'm working with this bus waxer.

Look, bro, I know you and Zeke have had a long history together, but it's you

and me now.

Slow butter.

Butter tonight.

This is the worst week ever for Zeke. Okay, first he gets told he's never

to skate again, and then he gets replaced by Kojo.

Least I can do is try to cheer him up.

You get the idea.

Thanks, Luke.

So, how you doing?

How am I doing?

Tell you how I'm doing. I'm stuck in this wheelchair and everyone's telling

my skating days are over.

I've been thinking, okay, maybe there's something else you could do in life

besides skateboarding.

Like what?

You are unstoppable.

Okay, you could be a business dude or a vampire slayer.

Or you could be the president of the United States.

President, come on.

Hey, just think about it, all right? Gotta go meet Kojo.

Kojo? Why would you need to go meet up with Kojo?

I didn't say Kojo. Yeah, you did.

Are you trying to hide something from me again?

I gotta go.

So,

according to these reports, as president, I have solved global warming

world hunger.

I'd say that's a pretty good first month in office.

Woo! Yeah!

How are you? Good?

You good or what?

Secretary of Turkey Jerky, how are you doing? How are you, Mr. P?

Well, Ruth, despite all my accomplishments, including making slow

country's official handshake, I still miss skateboarding.

Oh, bro, come on, man. We've talked about this, okay?

Your skating days are over.

You're president now, all right? They put your face on every $8 bill, okay?

get to blow up random empty stuff. Come on, bro.

Yeah.

It gets old after a while.

It never gets old.

Excuse me.

Kojo, didn't I banish you from this country?

Dude, this is a fantasy.

People can pop up any which way.

Hey, Luke.

Want to go grind the Capitol steps?

Oh, yeah. All right, I got a bookie. All right, Mr. President.

You hang in there, though. See you all later. Bye -bye. I don't want to be

stinking president.

I gotta get out of here.

So here's what we're going to do for the jam.

Combine my sweet skate skills with my hot beats.

Wait, what? You're adding music?

Does Sweaty Eddie know about this?

Look, he's going to love it. Got this whole thing planned out.

Put this on.

And what's the yellow paint for?

do the 540.

Quit.

Uh, Luth, what's going on?

It's not what it looks like, bro. Yeah, it is. I'm replacing you with the jam.

I'm sorry, bro. I didn't mean... That's not gonna happen, because I'm gonna

skate the vert ramp on Friday, and I'm gonna do the 540.

The whole time I was trying to take the landing, I thought I had to lean

forward. Being in a wheelchair, I realized that what I should have been

was leaning back.

I can do this, Luth. I know I can.

Yeah, there's just one little issue.

You can't walk!

I know.

Which is why I need you to help me get back up on my feet.

No.

Okay, I can't do that.

Why not?

Look, I feel bad about the situation, okay?

But this is all my fault. I'm the one who told you to do the trick in the

place.

I just, I don't want to see you get hurt again.

Luke, it wasn't your fault.

It was my decision to drop into the vert, not yours.

And getting back up on this board is going to be the biggest challenge of my

life. And I won't be stopped.

I am back.

Are you with me, bro?

I know.

Yeah.

Every step of the way, all right?

Let's go.

Kojo, you are killing me.

Zeke, what are you doing here?

Two days ago, you were in a wheelchair.

I've come to do the 540 McTwist.

Zeke, listen, I've always been behind you 100%. But it's too much of a risk. I

can't let you do this.

Sounds like my kind of challenge.

Before we unveil the new product line, I want you to feast your eyes on the vert

ramp.

Give it up for Zeke and his 540 McQuist!

Yeah!

Mr. Lockers?

Mr. Over.

Yeah, you know you don't have to do this, right?

You're ruining your life, Over.

My life will be ruined if I don't do this, but I'm a skater. I don't want to

president.

Over.

Who's ready for my chips and homemade guacamole? Right on.

Luke, you were careful to clean out the bedpan, right?

Dude, of course.