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And it's my pleasure, so to speak, to be selling the finest line of headstones,
caskets, and burial urns west of the Mississippi.
And doing a land office business, I might add.
Now, why is that? I'll tell you why. Because the West is getting civilized.
That's why poor people are still getting shot up more often than not. But
nowadays, they're getting a decent burial.
Picking up another passenger, ma 'am.
Well, that's out of the question. There's no room.
Yes, ma 'am.
This really won't hurt your luggage.
And it may do this lady quite a bit of good.
Right on through? Just the plan?
Yeah, just the plan, Ben.
Oh, thank you.
I won't have it, do you hear? I simply won't have it.
Yes, ma 'am, but like I said, no one is getting back on that stage.
That'll be just a might delay before the next one gets here.
Sorry. Listen, you, you can't talk to me like this. Do you know who my father
is? Well, not that it's going to make any difference, ma 'am, but go on.
Tell us who your father is.
Well, my father just happens to be the...
All right, Sheriff.
Look, it's very important that I get to Fort Cordovan as quickly as possible.
Now, here's $500. Now, I'll just slip aboard the stage. No, ma 'am, you purely
won't. Sorry.
You gents have got me dead wrong, honest.
Ask anybody. I run the squarest feral game between here and Yuma.
I don't know how that extra piece of heart's got in there. I swear somebody
have put it up my sleeve.
Come on, let's free him up. You're taking the life of an innocent
citizen.
Please, be merciful.
The quality of mercy's not strained. There ain't gonna be no hanging.
You just move over real peaceful like.
Get back. Move.
I got a couple of shells here that say that this is going to be done real
No good, my friend.
I've got six in mine.
take the bag and just spin them on your stuff, huh? No, we got what we came
after. Maybe even more than you figured on.
Now you tell your friends to drop their guns.
What's she doing?
What are you doing? Let go of me!
Oh, no, young lady. I've become very attached to you.
Just stay where you are, and we'll make a nice, peaceful departure with no
bloodshed.
Let's go.
Shame the way things turned out after all your planning.
Things were shaping up real fine till that female showed up.
That just makes my job a little tougher, that's all, Ben.
Let's go.
All right, just a scratch.
He's just knocked out.
Take him in.
Turn him over to Artemis Gordon.
I'm going to find him again.
Is it all right to talk with him now, Doctor?
Afraid not, Mr. Gordon.
Why, he can't still possibly be out from just a shoulder wound.
No, your prisoner's wound is superficial, as I told you. Well, then,
speak with him?
Maybe never, I'm afraid.
I don't understand.
Take off your coat.
It's a good deal more serious than I thought, isn't it?
Noguri's syndrome.
Does that mean anything to you?
Not very much. Some kind of an Asian disease.
Very deadly, very rare.
Very much confined to Asia, I always thought.
We all did.
Until we finally diagnosed what was really wrong with your prisoner.
It's unbelievably contagious.
And it's communicable after a three to five day incubation period.
Anyone who's had any contact with a carrier has to be inoculated within that
period of time. Or?
You're next.
Or?
Or it's too late.
Now, you've been protected, but of course Mr. West hasn't.
Get him in here right away, because if he's not inoculated within the right
period of time... I don't even know if I can find him in time, let alone get him
in here for an inoculation.
How much time do I have to get the serum to him?
Dating from today, he has at least until the 15th. At the outside, the 17th.
Before he would start feeling the classic symptoms.
Nausea, dizziness, blurred vision.
And then... Dead?
Dead.
For a ducket?
Dead!
Oh, my offenses rank.
Smells to heaven at the primal eldest curse upon it.
A brother's...
But in addition, Jim and the girl, not to mention the rest of the gang, have
undoubtedly been infected by this galloping disease by now, whatever the
it is.
Liguri's syndrome.
Asia's finest.
I've got less than three days to get to them with that information.
Well, what are you going to do about it?
Nothing at the moment, Colonel, because it'll do me no good at all to go
galloping off after them without some idea where they might be.
Until Washington sends me some information I've requested, I can't
I realize you have your problems, but this situation also poses a few for me
Territorial Banking Commissioner.
Well, at the moment, Mr. Guild, I'm a little more worried about Mr. West's
safety than I am about the missing money.
Granted, Colonel Richmond, but the situation is considerably worse than you
think. Farmers, ranchers, small businessmen, they're beginning to lose
the banking commission.
And on top of that, none of the stolen money has turned up anywhere.
It's as though it had been just swallowed up.
Yes, and since yesterday's holdup, another $150 ,000 is snatched out of the
economy.
At least there's one ray of sunshine.
And what might that be?
Hmm?
Oh, I was just thinking how much I'd like to be around when the gang starts
divvying up the loot.
Hey, you, whatever your name is.
Dear lady, from the bottom of my heart, I do sweetly urge you to shut up. Listen
to me.
If it's money you're after, I have a proposition for you. If it's money we're
after, you have a proposition?
I can get you money and lots of it if you'll do something for me.
You hear that?
All she has to do is reach out and touch and everything turns into gold. I know
who you are. You're the daughter of King Midas.
No, of the governor of this territory.
Governor Randolph Trent has one child, a daughter, named
Avery. Avery.
What is it you want, Miss Trent?
I need to get to Fort Cordovan as quickly as possible.
And once we're there, I'll have Daddy wire you the money.
I'll tell the boys to break camp.
You're practically in Fort Cordovan.
Stacy, give me pen and paper.
Carl, saddle up. You're going on a little trip.
I've just heard the missing girl is the governor's daughter.
So it seems.
Well, what are you doing about it? They must be stopped.
Mr. Guild, yesterday Jim West tangled with the leader of the gang.
A man who played character bits quoted Merchant of Venice.
Reasonable conclusion, we're dealing with an actor.
Later on, one of the gang dies, quoting Hamlet in his delirium.
Surefire conclusion,
We're dealing with a troupe, an acting company.
And right at this very moment, the Olympic Company, a Shakespearean acting
troupe, is touring the territory.
I fail to see what that means.
Here, I'll show you.
Now, these pins indicate the stage holdups. And we know for sure that the
Olympic Company has played the adjoining towns.
Which just might explain where the missing money is kept.
Exactly.
Now, they've already played Elkton, Sierra, and Milbank.
They seem to be heading towards Mexico, where they'll probably meet the rest of
the gang, so they'll be free to spend the money.
Artemis Gordon is on his way right now into the next town in sequence.
There. Artemis, looks like the play's a thing. We're in, we'll catch the
conscience of, uh, wonder who.
I thought we had made a deal.
Oh, we have, dear lady.
A most sacred binding compact.
I deliver you to the gates of Fort Cordova.
In return for which small service, your father will suitably reward me.
Well, then why are we waiting here in this loathsome place?
Patience, dear lady, patience.
Don't patience me. When?
When certain strategic supplies I've ordered arrive.
Till then, allow me to offer you wine.
Come.
Lovely setting.
Beautiful young lady.
And a fine vintage Maydoc whose crimson will
pale beside the crimson of your lips.
You are a thief.
And you'll probably wind up on the gallows.
But you do have style.
We've got a visitor.
What are you doing here?
Come on.
Hey, let go of me!
Let go of me!
What are you thinking?
Find out what happened to those guards.
And it's for you, my doomed friend.
You and I are going to have a little chat.
Where's Clyde?
Over there.
Drunken, misbegotten lout, swilling himself unconscious an hour before
time.
Get rid of him.
Perhaps the worst I ever had to play against.
But what have I got now?
Nothing. Bartending.
There's a special providence in the fall of a sparrow.
If it be now, it is not to come.
If it be not now, yet it will come.
The readiness is all.
Since no man hath aught of what he leave,
What is't to leave betide?
Yes, something.
You know your Hamlet very well, sir.
How familiar are you with Henry Forth?
No, I hath seen such scarecrows. I'll not more suit Coventry with them, that's
flat.
Good.
Nay, the villain's march wide betwixt the legs, as though they had jibes on.
For indeed, I had the most of them out of prison.
That's all, my friend. Show's over.
On the contrary, it's only the beginning.
I could use a false staff like you in my show tonight.
What's your name?
Kevin Kemble, and thank you, I'm not interested.
Would you like to hear some wild Irish poetry, my pagan beauty?
I'd pay very well for your services, Mr. Kemble.
Thank you, I'm not interested.
And be very, very grateful.
But on the other hand, how can one put a price on the gratitude of one's fellow
man?
If I come in peace, let him make a carbonado of me.
For I do not like such honor grinning as Sir Walter has.
Which, if I can say, so.
If not, honor comes unlooked for, and there's an end.
And they like you, Mr. Campbell.
Pissants.
So were the patrons of Master Will's Globe Theater, I'm told.
I've decided to extend our engagement here another three days.
You'll stay with us, of course.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm afraid I can't.
What?
Well, you see, it's my aunt.
She's taken very ill. I'm afraid that she isn't expected to live for three
So, under the circumstances...
I also would take it ill, Mr. Kemble, if our enthusiastic audience were to be
deprived of your falstaff for the run of our play.
Ready for you, Mr. Lansing.
Do I make myself clear, sir?
I am going to see I'm the only one who knows her Nobody else
but me She cried so when I left her It almost broke my heart But
if I ever find her We never more will part She's the sweetest
little rose But Texas ever knew Her eyes are bright as
They sparkle like the dew.
You may talk about your clementines and sing of Rosalie, but the yellow rose
of Texas is the only girl for me.
Where the Rio Grande is flowing, the stars are shining bright.
We walked along the...
Thank you.
I've decided to extend our engagement here another three days.
Stay with it.
What?
You are a talented fellow, Mr. Campbell.
And of course you can explain what you're doing in my dressing room.
I'm waiting.
I looked everywhere for you. I couldn't find you. I decided to wait for you
here. I see.
Any particular reason why?
Yes, to give you this letter.
It came by courier. He said it was most urgent.
Oh.
John.
You and I will leave tonight for Red Rock Cave.
We're not going to extend the performances for three additional days?
have changed, Mr. Campbell, so you're free to visit your dying aunt after all.
Oh. I suggest you get started right now. Oh, I certainly will, Mr. Lansing. Yes,
of course. Thank you. Oh, thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you very much.
You know, you were right. This is a very good one.
Good night.
Good night.
Yes. Would you please do me a great favor?
Why, certainly. What is it?
Inside my shirt, there's a cigar and a match. Even a condemned man's entitled
have a smoke.
Of course.
Thank you.
Add a little goodnight kiss, I say.
You wouldn't happen to be jealous now, would you?
Me? Jealous?
Not a chance And what's wrong with my kisses?
Oh, what's right with your kisses?
Well, I'll show you
Hey, go!
Breakfast. You might like to know that unlike you, he was a perfect gentleman.
I'd made a deal with him. He was going to take me to Fort Cordovan.
Here, sagebrush tea.
Come on, drink it.
It was all settled.
And then you came along.
Really? Well, I think you should read this. How I hate you.
How I despise you.
Fine. But you should read this letter. And when I tell my father what you've
done, he'll break you. You'll see.
Well, probably you ought to still read that.
One of his men was taking that letter to your father when I intercepted him.
Even if your father had paid the full amount, you would have ended up with a
knife in your back or a bullet.
May I, may I please have some of your sagebrush tea?
I'm sorry.
Could you please make a fire?
It would have to be a small one, I'm afraid.
Anything to keep from freezing.
Here, put this on.
You know, you never told me what's so important about Fort Cordovan.
Fort Cordovan is Donald.
And, uh, what is Donald?
A lieutenant stationed there.
And he's so handsome and so wonderful.
And you're in love with him?
Yes.
But Daddy had taken it into his head to disapprove, forbidden me to see him.
So I ran away from home.
Donald and I are going to get married.
Congratulations.
We're going to live in a little house on the post, all covered in honeysuckle.
Every night when Donald comes home, he'll have his dinner waiting.
Good morning.
I'm thirsty and hungry.
So am I.
Give me some time.
Where's Carl?
He's dead at the bottom of that gorge under.
By ransom.
That's the second 150 ,000 we've lost this week.
Well, don't worry about it. We'll get the girl back.
No, no, too risky. By now, the governor has to know his daughter's missing.
Yeah, and by noon, this place will be crawling with troops.
And by then, we'll be holed up in Red Rock Cave, and nobody except my brother
will know where we are.
Let's move.
Wait until they get out of sight, and then I'll track them.
But why?
Why?
That's why I came out here in the first place. That's why.
Yes, I'd say they're in that cave.
Well, now what?
Now I go in after them.
Let me help you down.
We'll take over for you now.
I can't leave you alone for one hour without you getting into some kind of
trouble.
We've got to get to that girl with an inoculation. You know that, don't you?
Yeah, I know that, honey. Where is she?
She's in the cave.
Let's see if there's another entrance. Right.
Well, I never sent you any note telling you to come here.
Something's very wrong.
Not anymore.
All we need is to get rid of West.
We have a fortune at our disposal.
And we're free to leave for Mexico whenever we... What's the matter with
It's true.
We've all been exposed to an Asiatic plague.
Without this inoculation, you won't live out the week.
He's lying, of course.
Am I?
Gentlemen, ask that man that's laying on the ground.
Which one of you will be next?
A little faint? A little dizzy, gentlemen?
I'll destroy the last two if you don't come out and give yourselves up.
No, Malcolm.
That's the last of the children.
What's she doing?
What's it look like she's doing?
You can't inoculate infected money.
Much prettier when you're smiling.
Ah, well, what else would a girl be doing on the way to her wedding?
Well... Avery, congratulations.
Thank you.
Paul, good luck. Thank you.
You know, I think Donald will like me so much better now than he did before.
Avery?
I'd like you to meet someone.
This is Donald.
How do you do, gentlemen?
I want to thank you for taking care of Avery.
Thank you.
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