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Thank you.
Oh, Mr. West.
Mr. West.
You're dead.
Who are you and what are you up to?
Give me an answer. Don't mumble.
You're
a
Secret Service agent?
You've got to be kidding.
Colonel Richmond sent me up from Washington to help you. Help me? Why?
Well, when I saw Mr. Gordon in Washington, I learned that he would be
some time. I persuaded Colonel Richmond to send me.
Well, Jeremy Pike has already been assigned to me.
Well, he said you'd find something for me.
Did he tell you what case we were working on?
Yeah, he said you were working on a huge opium smuggling ring and that you'd
been in a case for some time.
That's right, Mr., um...
Mr. Cranston.
Bosley Cranston.
Did he also tell you that we haven't had one single solitary lead?
But then just a few hours ago, I spotted the courier for the ring.
That was the break we needed.
And now he's gone.
He's gone?
Gone.
Thanks for your help, Mr. Cranston.
I'm really sorry, Mr. West. It's my first field assignment.
If you hadn't told me that, I never would have guessed.
Well, my work has always been in the laboratory.
We haven't... Want to find something?
Shouldn't we call a policeman and report this?
I just don't believe it. Nobody could be that stupid.
Well, I don't mean to minimize my mistake in calling to Mr. West when he
following that man, but if you're certain he's a courier for the smuggling
why don't you just take him into custody and interrogate him? Because of the
list.
The list?
Somewhere in this town, there's a list of the smuggling ring's dealers in every
city in the country, and we want to get our hands on that list before the ring
knows we have it.
Well, tell me how I can help.
You can help by catching the first train back to Washington.
Oh, yes.
Oh, please, Mr. West. Ever since I joined the service, I've been after
Richland to let me go into the field.
It's not that I don't enjoy my work in the laboratory, because scientific
inquiry will always be my first love.
But you wouldn't believe the staggering amounts of paperwork connected with it.
I just couldn't take it anymore.
Maybe we've been a little too hard on Cranston.
I'll do anything I can to stay. Anything.
Just tell me what to do.
Think I've got an idea.
Yes, of course, Cranston, my good man.
Prepare yourself to go to work.
What's all this?
Reports.
Reports? To Washington.
Paperwork, Cranston.
Paperwork. You see, we're behind in our paperwork.
Oh, you don't by any chance know how to use one of these, do you?
Excellent.
I hate to bother you, but they are reports to Washington. Would you mind
out?
Thank you.
Good man.
Well, it's all well and good to put him to work, but what are we going to do?
We're right back where we started.
Well, maybe not.
Oh?
Took it off the courier.
What would he be doing with half of a broken poker chip?
Unless... Exactly.
And I know where to find the other half of that poker chip.
What's all the clucking, Charlie? Half a poker chip's better than none.
Hey, not so fast, though.
Come with me, please.
My pleasure.
Thank you.
Get out of here!
Better get back to my typing.
Jim, I was worried about you.
Take a look at this.
Shapton's Reflections on Good and Evil, Volume 1.
First edition published in England in 1575.
Must be extremely valuable.
Almost priceless.
But not to us. It's not worth anything to us unless we can break the code.
Code?
Take a good look at one of the pages.
You see anything?
Some of the letters are thinly underlined.
Right. Now, if we put the letters together, they should spell out the
the addresses of the opium rings dealers around the country. Should?
But they don't. They don't make any sense at all. And I think I know why.
The first edition of Shafton's Reflections was published in two
So, half of the code is in the first volume, and the second part's in volume
two, wherever that is. For instance, top of page 29, pleasure is the chief... or
soul good in life.
Now, if you'll notice, the P in the word pleasure is underlined.
Excuse me, Mr. Pike.
The sentence you quoted isn't on page 29.
What?
It's on page 37.
Have you read this book, Cranston?
No. He's right.
He's right. It's on page 37.
I bet you said you didn't read the book.
Well, I haven't.
Well, not in the accepted sense of the word. I have flipped through it.
You just flipped through it?
Yes. I have what you might call a photographic memory. I'm able to look at
page of a book and it becomes indelibly imprinted on my mind.
Well, that's very interesting, Cranston.
I can't account for it. It's just the way I am.
Let's see.
You tell me what you read.
Well, wait a minute.
Would you do that again?
Okay.
Are you ready? Mm -hmm.
All right, let's have it.
You want it from the beginning?
Page 22, fourth paragraph from the top.
It was a cold, ominous night when Hiram Harp arrived at the country estate of
Lord Bushmill.
Rain was threatening, however, Hiram felt under the circumstances, he did it.
He can actually do it.
It's nothing but a great little parlor trick.
It's not getting us any closer to volume two.
Now, my plan is this.
Bosley makes a typewritten copy of the book.
Then we take a newspaper ad offering the volume for sale.
And the opium ring sees the ad, realizes it's their book, and they try and buy
it. And they'll want it so bad they won't let anybody outbid them.
Then I follow them to the second book.
You see anything wrong in that?
I'll let you know after I try it.
Howdy, friend.
Say, this the place they're going to hammer down that rare book?
If you're referring to the first edition of Shafton... That's the one, yeah.
Well, come right on in, Mr... Langham.
Leroy Langham. You can just call me Longhorn. Most folks do.
Say, who are them jaspers over there?
They're your competitors for the book.
Competitors?
Don't look like they'd be competition for a sick mule.
This way.
Gentlemen, may I introduce Mr.
Langham of Texas.
How do you know I'm from Texas?
Baron Kiyosai of Japan, bidding for the Ichi Literary Museum of Tokyo.
Don Carlos de Mendoza y Garcia of Barcelona, Spain.
And Mr.
Gideon Sticks of San Francisco.
Well, howdy, friend.
My pleasure, Mr. Langham.
I trust we shan't find our friendship strained when the bidding starts.
Isn't it time, senor?
Well, not until Mr. Langham has had a chance to examine the volume, Don
As I've already told the others, I'm not the principal in this sale, only the
agent for the owner.
Now, who's that?
Unfortunately, I'm not at liberty to divulge his identity, but upon
of this volume, I'm sure that you will, as the others have, find it to be a
genuine first edition of volume one of Shapton's Reflections on Good and Evil.
Well, I'll just have to take your word for that.
Back home in Langham, Texas, we figure on starting a little old library.
This here book will start us off right nice.
Gentlemen.
If you are ready, we will proceed with the bidding.
I must remind you first, before I entertain the first bid...
that nothing less than $20 ,000 will be accepted.
May I have the first bid?
$21 ,000. Thank you.
$21 ,100.
Can you tell which one is from the opium ring?
We'll know soon enough.
$22 ,800.
Ah, Don Carlos bids $22 ,800. $22 ,800.
Gracias, senor.
$25 ,000.
$30 ,000.
$31 ,000.
$45 ,000.
$50 ,000.
$51 ,000.
Fifty -five thousand.
Mr. Langham has bid fifty -five thousand.
Any other bids?
Mr. Sticks.
I'm afraid this is a bit too rich for my blood and my pocketbook.
All I can bid you, gentlemen, is good evening.
Good evening, Mr. Sticks.
Thanks for coming.
One down, three to go.
I bid the $70 ,000.
Don Carlos?
Gracias.
I, too, must retire.
Buenas noches, caballeros.
Buenas noches.
And there goes another one.
Seventy -six thousand.
Eighty thousand.
Have a listen.
Glasses.
My principal, the Taiichi Literary Museum, has authorized me to go as high
$100 ,000.
No higher.
I now enter that bid.
Wes, it's over. The book's been sold.
The Texan.
There's sure going to be some mighty happy folks back in Langham.
I paid good money for that book.
What tripped the alarm?
Couldn't find anything.
Got them checking the system.
Sticks? That's right. He just attended the auction to verify that it was the
right book.
He didn't care if Langham, the Baron, or Don Carlos bought it. He was going to
take it back.
Gideon Sticks. He's in the social register. He's a patron of the arts. And
also happens to own an export -import firm, which is undoubtedly the front for
the opium smuggling ring.
Incredible. Well, now you know where Volume 2 is, why don't you just get a
warrant for Mr. Sticks' arrest?
Oh, no. That's right. You have to have the book, break the code without the
opium ring knowing it.
We also have to make a copy of volume two right in Sticks' own library.
Impossible. It would take hours.
Take days.
Even if you did photograph it, you'd have to get all that equipment in and
without it being discovered.
We have a plan.
I think you ought to be sitting down when we tell you about it, Cranston.
Yes?
Ah, good evening, my dear fellow. Would you kindly inform Mr. Sticks that
Captain Cecil Smite, Allenby's second Earl of Southby, is coming?
Mr. Sticks is no one without an appointment.
Ah, quite so, quite so. It's a very wise policy, too, one which we follow
ourselves. We men of position mustn't make ourselves too accessible, should
However, we have something here which we feel your employer is a very devoted
art collector might wish to examine.
Come, come, come, my good man. Certainly there is nothing to be lost by
informing Mr. Sticks of our presence, is there?
Where is he?
Waiting in the police, sir.
Let him wait.
Excellent, excellent.
Ah, my dear Sticks, good to see you again, sir.
But perhaps you don't remember.
We met three years ago, I believe it was, at the Queen's Fusil Air Ball at
Buckingham.
Charming place you have here, utterly charming.
Cecil Smythe Allen, ma 'am.
Second Earl of South Bay.
Mm -hmm.
I understand you have something to show me.
Indeed I have, my dear Sticks.
Indeed I have.
Breathtaking, isn't it?
It was once the property of the Dowager Empress of the Fifth Ming Dynasty.
The central stone is the Burmese star ruby, the reddest in the world.
Sorry, Mr. West. This is my first assignment in the field. I'm allergic to
grass.
Swell.
Unfortunately, family fortunes suffered severe reverses of late.
The cards, the dice, the horse being the fickle things they are.
Wait here.
Why, that... Look at that.
Paste!
Do you see what I mean?
Luck, just luck.
There are two kinds of luck, Mr.
Allenby, or whatever your name is. Indeed, indeed.
I'm quite accustomed to taking the bad along with the good.
My glasses are broken.
If I can't see, I can't read. If I can't read, I can't photograph the book.
We might as well forget the plan, Mr. West.
Wait a minute.
What are you going to do?
Nolan plays Gideon Sticks with a fool.
Teach him a little lesson.
Then turn him over to the police.
Now just wait a minute, Sticks.
You know, this doesn't do justice to your reputation as a sportsman.
Who are you?
Who I am strikes me as being just a little unimportant right now.
What I am?
I'm a gambler.
A little down on my luck.
I would have expected that my feeble attempt at deception would have been
nothing more than a minor source of amusement to you.
Well, I trust the police will be more amused than I am.
I'm tempted to offer you a proposition, Sticks.
What proposition?
One game of pool.
The stakes being this.
If you win, your associates can teach me a lesson, as you put it.
If I win, I'm permitted to walk out of this house physically unharmed.
I thought as much.
Get rid of him.
Sticks!
Maybe it would be more interesting if we threw in $5 ,000 as a sort of side bet.
What have you got that could possibly be worth $5 ,000?
Just myself.
I told you I was a gambler. My life is collateral for a $5 ,000 loan.
Oh, you can't be serious.
Completely.
All right.
You've got yourself a bet.
Your life against my 5 ,000.
Good.
There you are.
My 5 ,000 against your life.
You break.
Get me a cigar from the library.
That's a scratch.
I hoped you'd at least give me a little competition.
Good shot.
Time to pay the piper.
Mr. Six? Uh -uh.
No welching.
I wouldn't think of it.
I'd just like to sink one last ball, even the cue ball.
What for?
Oh, as a last tribute, salute to one who took the ultimate
gamble and lost.
All right, all right, all right.
It's cost you enough.
Well, come on, come on, come on. Shoot.
Get it over with.
How much longer?
Just a few pages, Mr. West.
Anything wrong, Mr. Stick?
Oh, no. Nothing.
I probably should find a safer place for these.
What's his name?
E. John Smith.
He died in Hong Kong.
His body's being sent to his family in Denver.
Denver.
It's the fourth one from Hong Kong in a month.
Things are booming in Denver, boss.
Well, let's open it up and have a look at him.
He's a little fellow, isn't he?
Well, the littler they are, the more stuff we can pack in with them, boss.
All right.
Let's get him down to the train.
Get my carriage, will you? I think I'll go to the club.
Very well, sir.
One moment, Mr. Sticks.
You're under arrest in the name of the United States government.
Do you think it's possible that we could have underestimated Cranston?
Nationwide rage.
Complete success.
All of Gideon Sticks' dealers under arrest.
Good work.
Congratulations are in order. We congratulate you. We couldn't have done
without you, Cranston, and we really mean that.
Well, you're much too generous, Mr. West.
I think this calls for celebration.
Cranston's all dressed up. What do you say we go out and find out what this
has to offer in the way of feminine companionship?
I'm way ahead of you, Mr. Pike.
What do you mean?
Well, I just happen to know three girls here in San Francisco, the Gaffney
sisters, their old friends of the family, and three of the most
young ladies I've ever known.
Well, I took the liberty of inviting them to have dinner with us tonight at
Delmonico's. I think you'll find them most stimulating, and they can converse
almost any subject with the most amazing erudition.
I think that's them now.
Can you imagine what those girls look like if they're friends of
Cranston's? Old family friends.
Who can converse with amazing erudition?
Swell.
What's up? They're waiting for us.
Bosley, Jim and I, we just remembered that we can't go out tonight.
Well, why not?
Well, it's an urgent message from Colonel Richmond, and we have to be here
it arrives.
You sure?
Positive.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
Well, if you say so.
Good night.
Good night.
You're positive you won't change your mind?
Well, we'd like to, but we can't. It's impossible tonight, Cranston.
Okay.
The Gaffney sisters.
Heaven spare us.
Jerry, you were right.
All right.
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