Original subtitles

two potato wedges baskets, and a vat of flip -flops.

Oh, smells great. Thank you, little lady.

You got any ketchup?

Squeeze from the center, sir.

Yeah, okay.

You take cash?

My middle name is Cash. Here you go, little lady. Coming through!

Bye!

Oh, sorry. Let me recall that order for you. That's okay.

Ow. I saw an omelet stand down the block.

Ow.

That's 98 bucks walking away.

The dude was in the path.

He was totally asking to be nailed. Be out of this, stretch.

Yes, sir.

That's the itch. I will not eat, sleep, drink until I have my revenge.

Yeah, right.

Well, I got four for you.

Court gets butt shine.

Wait a minute. Is butt shine one word or two?

One's funny.

That's a myth.

Wait, don't tell me. Dude, you won't believe what happened. Yes, so maybe.

forget that I'm a genius. Are you crazy? Someone should be listening to us.

Wait, don't tell me. Not again.

Would you just calm down? Is there a problem?

Let's get a pizza. And then we'll act like nothing ever happened.

Sure,

Ginger was totally popping veins out there. But I've dealt with her attempts

revenge before.

And you know what? It doesn't faze me.

Mustard in my toothpaste.

Tangy.

Or chata in my sock drawer. That's sticky rice milk.

I'm even getting used to the smell of rotting fish in my pillow.

So basically, there's not a single thing she can do to get back at me.

I tell you, that dog next door barks from sunup to sundown.

Disturbing my morning oats.

So let's put it to a vote. All in favor of having the Wilson's dog permanently

muzzled, say aye. Aye.

As president of the Pacific Terrace Homeowners Association, I, Reginald

declare it so.

Neighbors, if I may have two minutes of your time.

Let's talk about the real problem here. An ugliness that is so ugly, it makes me

shiver.

I'm talking about skateboarders.

I'm listening.

Ask you, Mrs.

Vanderbottom. Are you allowed to drive your minivan down the library steps?

Recklessly all in your baby carriage?

Ha! I think not.

You'd be in jail, Mrs.

Vanderbottom. Sleeping in a bunk bed and pooping in a stainless steel bowl.

Awful stuff, Missy.

All in favor of having the clamps put down on these skateboarders, say aye.

Aye.

All skateboarders must henceforth carry a city -issued license.

Henceforth? Who says henceforth?

A skateboarding license.

Probably like that worthless license you got down at the fair, lad. Whoa!

It's not worthless.

Could buy babe magnets.

Probably get this for new.

Whatever. We'll go down there. It'll be some laughs. And, uh, you are sagging a

little low, bro.

Why, thank you.

People ask me why I sag my pants.

Top five reasons. Number five, I love to show off my fancy undies. Number four,

I love the cool breeze.

Number three, girls love it. Number two, I feel loosey -goosey.

And the number one reason why people sag their pants is you save a lot of

money on belts.

Seriously, I'm not giving another dime to the belt industry.

All right, Deputy Dingle, what do we got to do to get out of here?

You boys aren't going anywhere today.

Today your buns are mine.

Okay, could you be a little more specific?

Maybe.

Maybe not.

Hope this doesn't take long.

Got myself a female lady waiting in the car, if you know what I mean.

Cornelius Jonesworth, are you coming?

Ma, I told you I got to do something.

I wasn't referring to her when I said female lady. Got another one waiting in

the car.

Only female lady waiting in this car. Okay.

What do we got to do?

Well, there's a written test, a road test, a background check, and I need

somebody to lick this stamp for me. I will.

Is this for the test?

No. I'm sending a postcard to my grandma.

Now, you kids think it's cool to kick up your boards.

It's not!

What's cool is to bend over.

And gently pick up the board with two hands.

That's cool.

That's not cool.

It's so cool.

It's on fire.

Cold fire.

What does that even mean? Don't you question the officer, Cornelius

Ma, I told you you could leave.

All right, let's focus.

And bend, grab.

I think we got it.

Oh, you think you got it, do you, hotshot?

Let me ask you this.

What comes after bend?

Grab.

Oh, yeah, you got it.

Right turn. Right turn.

Left turn.

Left turn.

Yo.

Yo.

Oh, that's not a signal.

I'm waving to my therapist. He's helping me with some anger issues.

Tony, I'll see you tonight.

Jerk bait.

So a couple hours before darkness, you're going to put on one of these.

Okay, I am not doing that.

Sure. Kids are going to tease you.

The teasing builds character.

And character is cool.

Congratulations, gentlemen. You've got your licenses.

Here are your skateboarding handbooks.

They're your lifelines to safety.

Do either of you have any questions?

You're free to go.

Something was fishy about this law, so I read it more closely.

No ollies, no grinding, no backside 360s, no kickflips, fishtails, frontside

fakies, nose jacks. No nose jacks?

All in accordance with community code 757B, also known as...

The Ginger Ordinance. I didn't want them to name it after me.

They insisted.

It's official.

I have wrecked you.

Gotta admit, we got wrecked.

It's the principle of it, man. Skating is about freedom, no boundaries. I'll

lean down a flight of stairs with a chicken in your pants, whatever.

I gotta blow off this dog.

Bendingo, your day just went from lazy to lucky.

I told you, I told you. Step off your boards.

Hands where I can see them.

Not like that.

On the hips.

Not my hips.

Can we just get this over with? You boys are in a lot of trouble. I clocked you

doing 12 in a five zone.

You do the math.

Luth, it's an expression.

Let me see your licenses.

Certified babe magnet.

Nice try. It's expired.

The wrong one. I'm sorry.

Let me just say one thing first.

This.

Here's what I think about all your new skateboarding rules. Bro, are you sure

you want to do this? And my compadre agrees.

No, no, no. If you have paper, I'll fix that. You just entered a whole new world

of stupid son of a bitch. Now I'm going to be confiscating your skateboards.

And them more.

Slowly.

You know what we have to do?

Horrender?

What?

Looks like Christmas came early this year.

All units, prepare for high -speed shakes.

This is Kemp Bernard and Skychopper 7 with late -breaking news. Two area boys

have been evading police ground controls for over an hour. They're considered

very dangerous...

All units, they're signaling for a left turn behind the wall.

All units, I've been due.

Busted.

At least we got cool racing stripes.

So Deputy Dingus confiscated my board, but I'm not worried. I've got a bunch of

backup boards that no one knows about.

What do you want?

Not what I want. It's what he wants.

We received an anonymous tip from your sister that you might be harboring

illegal backup boards.

I wish.

Under his bed, in his hampered toilet tank, soft drawer.

No. And the sweater.

Thank you, Deputy Dingle, for helping me get revenge.

Revenge? I mean, for upholding the law.

That's more like it.

You took away the one thing that I love, skateboarding. Look at her.

All she cares about is that stupid potato wedge stand.

Wait a minute. You won't believe the idea I just got.

People of Pacific Terrace, let me ask you something.

What is the number one problem in our lovely village?

Sidewalk food stands.

You are correct, strange neighbor.

And there's one stand in particular that is most troublesome.

Ginger's potato wedge stand.

Exactly, strange neighbor. I'm talking about the traffic snarls, the stench of

rotting potato peels, and those wedges are fattening.

Mr. Johnson, if I may be so bold, how much weight have you put on since Ginger

opened up her stand?

Eleven pounds. 11 pounds?

That is an outrage.

He's a fat slob!

No, we are all fat slobs, thanks to Ginger. Yeah, but he's a beach whale.

Poor kid. Strange neighbor.

All right.

All in favor of banning sidewalk dance, say aye.

Aye.

You're a little early today, Duffy Dingle.

Get him a same blue plate on the house, Groovy Cheddar.

Customer service is my specialty.

And make it quick, because I'm shutting you down.

What? There's a new law in the books banning sidewalk businesses, otherwise

known as the Zeke Ordinance.

Here's the platter.

Oh, rats, Kirby, Chad.

Happy?

Delighted.

Skate on the old board right now.

Huh.

Actually, I'm in the mood for a potato wedge.

And I'd pay top dollar, too.

Look at this juicy driveway.

Just enchanting to be skated on.

You want to know why I like Idaho?

Because it's the potato capital of the world.

Because that's what they make potato wedges out of. Yeah, I know.

Luther, what are your pants doing? Jumpsuit just passed a new law. The no

drawers law.

That's not all, okay? He's passing all kinds of crazy laws.

There will be no more crying babies outdoors.

There will be no jump rope or hopscotch on the sidewalks. And if you wear

sandals, you now have to wear socks underneath.

I thus decree.

Getting out of control, man. I totally agree.

Kojo, why do you care? I look like my dad on vacation.

Wow.

Hey, why are you laughing? This is your fault. You're the one that turned

Jumpsuit into a monster. It's your fault. You're the one who was skating

here like a monkey. Bottom line, Jumpsuit has gone nuts with power and we

need to stop him.

So, I say we temporarily set aside our differences and we... What

happened next?

It was very disturbing.

So I suggest for those of you who get sick easily, grab a bag.

Work together.

Fine.

I'm in.

Luther wasn't wrong. I almost threw up myself.

Ginger and I have gotten along zero minutes since the day she was born.

So Ginger and I are a team.

I'm in the bathroom. Do you mind?

But how are we going to take down a grown -up who's gone nuts with power?

With a little plan I call Operation Jump.

Oh,

yeah,

baby.

Mabel, where's my jumpsuit?

Phase one complete.

Over. So I'll be that.

I think it'll work.

It's too stupid not to.

All right.

Jumpsuit liquidation cell?

One day only. Oh, I diggity.

Hello, I'd like to file a police report.

Do you have a complaint?

Yeah, there's a guy skateboarding down Eisenhower like a maniac.

Mm -hmm.

Phase two complete.

All right, boys and girls, let's roll.

Such guys as having a jumpsuit jamboree, and they close in ten minutes. So leave

me be.

You're exceeding the speed limit. Let me see your skateboarding license.

You know I don't have a license. I'm only on that thing because my car's

Everybody's got some kind of excuse.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

They're for those kids.

Are you saying those laws don't apply to everyone?

Care for some kettle corn? It's Mr.

Johnson's finest.

Mr. Johnson, I got your battery right here.

I'll put it right here.

I never saw that stand before in my life. Let me get this straight.

You're speeding on a skateboard, wearing your drawers way too low, and operating

an illegal kettle corn stand.

Fred, I'm going to have to take you in.

You kids played me very well.

Want some kettle corn?

Thanks, sir.

In the end, Operation Jumpsuit worked to perfection. He realized how unfair his

laws really were.

And I hereby propose that everything goes back the way it was.

It was good to have things back the way they were.

As for me and little Miss Butch, I mean, Ginger, we've learned to be a little

nicer to each other.

Hey, Toad Breath, you left your disgusting...

I told you I don't hear you unless you knock.

See, back in the day, I would have totally beamed her in the head.

Please, check it out.

So there's no hard feelings?

Jumpsuit gave me a jumpsuit. Pro, you may not wear that thing in my house. Oh,

come on. This is all sorts of awesome.

Single -piece construction, fake sagging, and non -issue.

And it's been keeping all kinds of cool things in its body.

They're pulling stuff.

This is the gift that keeps on giving.

jumpsuit's a certified baby magnet, too.