Original subtitles

We're going to find a way to drill through that wall, take a fortune from

vault. I figured it out. I never had any doubt.

You asked me to work with you, Mr West.

I don't want to check up with Ted. You're trying to set your husband up

ex -wife. I'm not having Ted check up with some gold digger. Even worse,

There is something you can do for me tonight, if you're up for it.

Oh, God!

The first thing is the rush.

And then your organs start to shut down. A week later, a month later, you die.

All I want is to go to my grave, happy in the knowledge that my boy is safe.

I never asked you to be the martyr.

You crossed the line today.

Nobody, and I mean nobody, finds out. Not Cheryl, not my kids, and not Dad.

You've got this, Ted.

Every detail.

You have it covered.

It's not the job I'm worried about.

Oh, yeah?

It's this bloody funeral you got us going to in the morning.

Eight funerals.

I'm not so keen on them myself.

Good. So do we have to go?

Yeah.

Ted, do not even think about it. We are going.

And that's that.

You just make sure you're home in time.

Are you sure you don't need me?

We have the people for the job. Half my crew.

Yeah, well, they're all in for a reason. Just not me.

I need you here for your mother in case this thing goes tits up. Bullshit.

We both get next. What happens then? Bullshit, bullshit.

This is about the Bianca thing. I'm getting kicked to the curb. Wolf.

Leave your father alone.

He's got a job to do.

He doesn't need your shit.

Want to be useful?

Pour us both a drink.

You can sit up with me.

You know to stick to the plan, right?

The plan.

Okay, off you go.

I'll make my father proud.

And you too.

Thank you.

You okay?

All the way, boss.

You okay?

We're dead.

You're not there when we need you. Don't worry about me. That's all you have to

do.

23 years since we did our first job.

Trying to make me feel old.

You and me both.

All right, listen up.

We all know what we have to do, so let's do it.

Don't fuck it up.

Inspirational, Ted. Let's go.

You know, the most... unattractive thing a man can be.

A sulky little bitch.

Really not a good look.

I'm not sulking.

Could have fooled me.

I don't like feeling useless. Is that a sin?

Okay, Wolf.

I'm gonna need you to get the fuck over yourself.

Because pretty soon, I'm not gonna be here, and I will not leave this family

the hands of a whining hippie boy.

And Ted is going to fall apart.

I need to know you'll be there for him.

For me.

I would have sorted it.

One way or another, I would... Yeah, well, I got in there first and now it is

sorted.

And at least I'll go knowing my boy is safe.

Dottie Pats.

Pull up a bar.

Really not going to miss you calling me that.

My name's Simon. My occupation, well, I've been working 20 years at the gas

station downtown.

I love cars, you know.

Without me, they wouldn't go very far. I like now.

I like my work.

But my wife, she makes me feel like such a jerk when I can't get it up.

Sometimes I look at her.

Hey, sorry guys, club closed tonight.

Frickin' bugged me.

So they are pumping a full of nutty shit.

I got a cat.

The thing about the cockroaches is bullshit, right?

It's a story so the council would shut the club down, right?

No, Lefty, we actually let cockroaches loose in here.

Hundreds of little fuckers.

They're all over the bar and everything.

People were freaking out.

Pretty hilarious when all the dancers came through. In a way, why did no one

tell me this part of the plan?

We've got a problem with cockroaches, Lefty.

Oh, apart from the fact they're creepy and carry disease.

Yes. You know what people usually say about you?

Your job, mate.

You get first crack.

All yours now.

Okay.

Let's do this.

Carol calls it the widow's watch, which I always hated.

Till now.

For some reason, it really speaks to me now.

It's sexist.

The women waiting at home while the men are out hunting.

And tell me, Blondie, do you have the skills to do what Ted's doing tonight?

Of course not. Well, when you have the skills and they still won't let you do

it, then that's sexist.

Also not going to miss the Blondie thing.

Reporting as ordered.

You don't have to be here, Carol.

Well... Tradition, isn't it? The vigil?

Since when have you called it the vigil?

I just thought a widow's thing was a bit on the nose these days.

Very sensitive of you.

So why do we have to go to this fucking funeral, apart from because you say we

have to?

He went to war with us.

We won.

In the paper, it says he was drunk and drove into a pond.

How is that winning? Once upon a time, he wanted to drive us out of our home.

We're still here.

He's gone.

So it's a victory lap. Well, Nyree, if it helps, you can think of it as a

practice for mine.

Rita, you're dark at the best of times, but there truly is the icing on the

cake. Oh, come on, just let me have this funeral, because the next one will be

mine, and it's not as if I'll be able to enjoy the show. Chief.

So here's the plan, like it or not.

We wait for the boys, we say ta -ta, Frankie Figgs, and then we come back

for the wake. He's having his wake here.

No, my wake, Carol.

After all I've done for this family, I deserve a bloody good wake.

One I can actually raise a glass to. Stop it!

Stop what?

Treating it like it's a joke.

And by it, you mean my death.

Which means I reckon I can treat it however the fuck I want, Wolf.

Wolf!

It's just her messed up way of dealing with everything. Ignore her. That's what

I'm doing, by getting away from it. Come to bed then.

When I said getting away from it, I meant getting as far away from here as

possible. It was a mistake coming back here. It says we failed.

Don't be ridiculous.

Go inside, Cheryl.

Go join the Widow's Watch or whatever they're calling it tonight.

I can't be around all this bullshit.

Good, then keep going.

Keep going, nice and slow.

Little bit more.

Okay, neck it up.

Slow it down.

Time for Sparky to do his thing.

Okay, once we bust through on this one, we pull the drill out, you do your

thing. Piece of pitch.

Yeah. How long has Sparky done this thing?

Yeah.

Space boy, over.

Roger. Okay, it's time to do your... Fuck's sake!

Fucking barf this thing, get off me!

Earth?

Earth, are you still there? Over.

Fucking do your job, okay?

Well, I'll be blind.

Okay, boys, here we go.

Yep, we're in.

Good boy.

Good boy.

Good boy. Good boy. Good boy.

You're getting better in your old age here, Bill.

You skinny man.

I

like

the multi -day tip.

Yeah? How so?

Oh, if it's smashing grandpa, you'll spend it.

Oh, I think I can live with the shame.

She's gone downhill very quickly. Tell me about it. It's the cancer.

Sometimes it's slow, then suddenly it's fast.

Thank you, Dr. Carroll.

Well, it is.

I've been reading a lot about cancer lately, just in case. In case you

across a cure?

In case I can be useful.

Junior dealing with it well?

At least he confronted it tonight.

It's been like walking on eggshells since we moved back in.

Confronted it by riding off into the night.

Sometimes men confront things by running away from them.

Or he could grow up here and deal with it.

And instead of talking shit, it'd be good if someone got me a drink.

No wonder we still love you.

Yeah, what's wrong with you people?

Don't worry, Rita. I'll hate you forever.

And I shall happily take that thought with me to the grave.

Get the hell out of me.

Having a cheeky old perv for you?

Like that would shock you.

Aren't you meant to be at mummy and daddy's place?

I don't get why you want to move out of here.

The bad guy's dead, isn't he? And this place is way cooler.

Okay, this is fun. Not talking to you.

Trouble with the missus.

Come and have a swim.

Swimming washes away everything.

What is it with you?

About me?

I thought I made that clear.

But why?

Because you're fucking hot.

Because I think about it all the time.

What it would be like.

Because you'd be getting one over your sister.

This is nothing to do with her.

This is about me wanting you.

Don't get me wrong, Wolf.

I don't want to play happy families with you.

I just want to fuck you.

Something called bearable and valuable?

Oh, yes, young friend, yes. Yes, indeed.

Sorry, pilot, club shut tonight for a fumigation.

I don't think so, mate.

There are days when I love my work.

Hello.

Hello.

You're the one with the tiny cock, right?

One testicle.

Lefty. That's right.

So, how's our little job going, then?

We've got a problem up there. Wait.

Not a fucking chance.

Iris, what are you doing here?

It's my club, Teddy boy. I can come and go as I please.

Are you sure you want to come and go right now?

Just making the most of the opportunity.

Bringing us some water, Iris, because it's such thirsty work.

Oh, wouldn't you know it?

The buggers who used my place to stage a robbery torched it to cover their

tracks. No, that is not part of the plan, Iris. Well, me and my boys here

that the plan could do with some kicking.

The tweak where you get your cut as well as the insurance money. You can see why

this has a lot of appeal for me. Mm -hmm.

Pity about the part where it gets us all nicked.

The power's going to be out for hours, Iris. Maybe even days.

They won't even know that there's been a robbery until we are long gone.

But if the fire engines start rushing to the place, there are hordes of cops

everywhere. People having a look, see what's going on?

Fine. Well, we'll wait until you're gone. You don't think that torching the

place kind of sends the message that you were involved, Iris?

No, it says that the robber's covering their tracks. There won't be any tracks.

You will look like another innocent victim here. As innocent as you can

look. And quite frankly, if I worked for an insurance company, which I did once,

I would not pay out under such dodgy circumstances.

Good point, Lefty. I know, I'd be going straight to the cops with that one.

Another good point, Lefty.

Right, well...

We'll leave you to it then. Good idea, Iris.

Is that... No, you cannot have your cut. You will get your cut when you get your

cut.

Rightio, then.

God fucking help me.

No staying power in the inn?

I've got four kids, Mary.

And a missing husband. That too.

Kind of handy, wasn't it?

What was, Mary?

Figs, driving off the road like that. All when he was about wreaking vengeance

on your family.

That's what we're going to celebrate in the morning. I don't think you should

celebrate a death.

You think there won't be people celebrating the news of my death, Carol?

I bet the dog looks going to have a right old loser.

I can't do this anymore.

Do what?

Sit here and listen to you joking about your own death.

What else do you want me to do about it? I don't know.

I just can't listen to it anymore.

I need to have a lie down.

What?

Yeah.

OK, baby bear, bring it on in.

Yes, it is.

You drive careful now, sweetie.

We all good?

No one since our visitors left.

Where's your bloody girlfriend?

Hey, not his girlfriend.

Um, I think she might be.

I live in her.

Yeah, well, don't.

All yours.

Call me sweetie again, and I'll smash you in the back.

Wow. You're getting into the whole truck driver vibe.

There is a lot... A lot of cash here.

Way more than I was expecting. I told you. It's where all the dodgy companies

like to hide their estate cash.

Not that we need to worry about.

What, revenge of the property developers? No, I think we'll be okay.

Better than okay.

Set for ages.

As long as no one gets stupid.

We are not stupid people, Mr. Ted.

Okay, this is how it's going to work.

You get the stash house sorted?

Of course.

So we'll take the jewels down country.

Yeah, it'll take time. We need to cut down the more obvious pieces.

Understood. Then you'll feed the cash back to Lifty.

That's how we always used to do it, right?

Yeah, but then that didn't go so well.

It worked well for a number of years before that, as I remember.

You up for it?

You sure you want me to do this?

Yeah, I am.

Okay. Then we've all got our jobs to do.

And a funeral to look forward to.

You okay, Sparky?

Am I?

What?

It's still me.

Right.

You did a good job. That's what I was getting at.

Do you speak Italian?

Is that I type of fuck me harder?

Oh, yeah, in some circles.

Nori's really big on me speaking Italian while we fuck him.

Say she's practising for when we're there.

It's weird fucking Nori and saying shit like, and seeing how much it gets her

off. You straight people never cease to amaze me.

Why don't you do some of that blow?

Just to get through tonight and on to the stupid funeral? Nah, I'm not going

the funeral.

Well, we've been ordered.

Rita doesn't get to play the I have cancer and I'm dying, so do what I say

all the time.

Shit, she's been playing the do what I say card all her bloody life without the

actual cancer.

Work on me.

Yeah, but unlike you, Lefty, I actually have a spine.

Rita didn't make it, eh?

I mean, I know she wasn't looking too fresh, but I thought that she... No, no,

no, Phineas. I mean, she didn't make it to wait up for us. Went to bed about an

hour ago. Oh.

Okay, well, that's good. Like it?

Yeah. I take it from the fact that you're here that we had a win? Oh, yeah,

had a win, all right.

Oh, better not.

Might be like embalming fluid, and then I'll be embalmed for all eternity.

Okey -dokey.

Gentlemen.

To the very nice job that Phineas found.

Cheers, boys.

Eric!

Eric!

Eric! What?

Do I look dead to you?

You what?

I think I'm dead.

So you died on the job?

Like father, like son.

But you got the job done fast, right?

I was underground.

There was light, then darkness.

And then...

And I was lifted up like I was climbing a ladder. And then I ran.

I ran and I ran and I ran. Rocky, you don't look any deader than usual.

But do you want to know how you'll find out for certain?

Go to sleep. If you don't wake up in the morning, you're dead.

I needed to get away from it.

Okay.

Come and lie beside me.

I stink from the job.

I like your stink.

Yeah, you always did.

You know I'm getting a stiffy.

Right? I can't help it. It's okay, Phineas.

You know I like your stiffies.

In fact... What are you doing?

Remembering what your stiffy feels like.

I thought we were... Shh.

Don't overthink it.

Do we have to go to this thing?

I'm not game enough to say no.

Night.

Beth Archie.

The clothing designer.

What does he get you going?

We're not fucking on Rita's couch.

Are we good?

Better than good.

You're the best, Ted West.

Always hoping.

Take a shower.

No. Cold hard light of day, eh?

So shut your eyes and pretend it's last night.

So, what's the deal with this funeral? I'm meant to be wrangling your kids at?

Telling my mum once.

Nothing to do with me.

Will you be there?

You say one word to Cheryl and the next funeral will be yours.

Man, aren't you grumpy first thing in the morning?

I'm furious.

Fuck me again and I promise not to tell.

God, stop worrying.

This isn't about me waving my dirty knickers in Cheryl's face.

What is it about?

Me getting what I want.

And knowing I'll get it again.

One day.

Dream on.

Oh no, you'll be back.

Just bloody sit down, Rita. I'm making breakfast.

It's my kitchen. I can cook for these people.

Are you sure about that? Have you looked in the mirror lately?

Morning, ladies.

Nice to see the day's off to a rip -roaring start.

I'm not in the mood to be argued with this morning, Ted.

Rita, why don't you sit down? Let Cheryl cook.

It's a big day ahead, you know. You don't want to peak too early.

People are shit at trying to be nice.

Well, see?

Wasn't so hard, was it?

Is this all the bread we've got?

In the freezer downstairs.

And if you really want to play this game, you can make me a bloody cup of

Certainly, my love.

Sparky.

Spark?

Eric!

What?

Well, I just said what, didn't I?

Check if there's bread in the freezer.

Yeah.

Bring it upstairs.

I guess you're alive then.

I don't understand about last night. I thought we were off and then we rooted

all night.

I told you not to overthink it.

I can't help but think it because it happened.

Last night was all about grief.

Was it?

It was two people who needed each other reaching out in the moment.

Okay.

What about this morning?

The moment has gone, Phineas.

We had it last night.

And yes, on some levels it was a mistake, but on other levels we needed

You really needed it?

Well, yes, but...

So did you.

What if I need it again today?

The moment is gone, Finn.

It's time to move on with our lives.

Okay, let's get this thing done.

No time for tears, Phineas.

Kind of is, Carol.

No.

It's time for us to be strong.

And save the teeth for later.

Well, Arnie.

Mr. Burt. You get it done?

We got it done.

That's good, but you know I'm watching you, right?

I can see you're watching me.

And if you step out of line, I'll be all over you.

I know that.

Because I know what you Olin boys are like.

Here when the going's good and shooting through at the first sign of hard work.

I can assure you that your racist assumption does not apply to me.

Well, they better not.

Because I'm still watching you.

This is weird.

Going to a funeral of someone I've never met who's seen a guy to shoot my

boyfriend. Did you just use the B word?

Is that not right?

My lord, I hope it is.

In which case, this is like a very strange first actual date.

Thank you.

Okay. He's not coming.

Like fuck he's not.

Well, he's been pretty to Tim when I spoke to him last night.

Well, speak to him again.

Eh? If we're all here for Rita, then we should all be here for Rita.

But the... Don't argue, Lefty. Just go and do it.

Oh, hey. Here, here. Leave me here. I'm fine. I'm fine.

I told you, I'm not coming.

Yeah, well, they didn't exactly fly.

He warns that Ted's waiting for you.

I'm tired, Lefty.

Aren't we all? Too bad.

Tired of funerals.

Been to more than my fair share.

Well, on account of all the gay people dying.

On account of if I've been to too many funerals.

So, well, how many funerals is too many?

One. Just the right person.

Rita made it very clear.

We're all expected to show up.

And what Rita wants, Rita gets.

Still works that way, I'm afraid.

Jesus Christ, Ben. Stand still for one bloody second.

I don't want to go.

Who said you had a choice? We're doing this for Grandma. The bloody end of it.

Daddy there?

I don't know.

Pink? For a funeral?

She refused for anything else.

Whatever.

What are you smiling about?

I just love funerals.

Weirdo. Come on, let's get this over with. Ted?

Ted?

Ted?

Time to go.

Do me up.

It's okay, Ted. It's what she wants.

So we owe her this much.

Reese is in the bathroom.

I know.

Oh, for fuck's sake, Van.

That's the only clean bloody chute you've got. Why did you eat fake beans

Reese is in the bathroom.

Can I ask a question? No, you're not dead.

No, so if Bianca Figgs is an outlaw on the run, does that mean that Crystal

inherit all of Frankie's land and money?

And does that mean that Billy's going to inherit it from her and face the life

Crystal if she could be gone any second?

If Billy inherits it, does that mean that you... Or does going to prison mean

that won't happen?

All very good questions, Sparkster.

Yeah, so do you reckon, am I dead or am I not dead? I can see evidence both

ways. Sparky, you're not dead. But how do you know?

Because you're standing here getting dressed and we're talking.

Yeah, what if those are all things I can do when I'm dead?

Sparky, there's only one dead person today and it's not you.

But how do you know?

So just go outside in the sun, and if you don't burst into flames, then you're

not dead. I'm not a vampire.

Just go.

Okay.

Want a hit?

Pass.

You okay?

Fucking van managed to get food all over his shirt just by walking past the

kitchen. Least manky other shirt will do.

Bloody reader in this bloody circus.

So has Wolf shown up?

No. And if he does?

I will probably kick him in the balls.

But will you tell him?

About us?

You know.

I'm thinking not, Eric.

That work for you?

Yeah. Yeah, I'd say so.

Your troops are assembled.

Then we should go.

Rita, we don't have to do this.

After all the shit that man has put us through.

Don't you want to dance on his grave?

I'll leave that to you.

All right.

Let's get to this fucking funeral.

Okay.

I'm free to make it.

You know how much I love funerals?

Speaking of which, you wouldn't know where Frankie's aftermath has been held,

would you?

Yeah, the West Auckland Business Association place, I believe.

I have a wee job for you.

After.

We need to make a stop on the way.

Hiding here, is he?

Where else will he be?

Got every other bugger to go to this thing. No way he's getting out of it

because he's in a... You stay here. I'll...

Drag them out by the bulls. Oh, I'm happy to help. No, no.

Call it a lesson in getting too big for your boots.

Now get up.

We've got a bloody funeral to get to.

Path. No.

We're going as a tribe to send a bloody message.

We won the war.

Too right we won the war.

At what cost?

No cost from where I'm standing.

I'm a mother. I defend my young. Always have done. Always will do.

Not for much longer though.

Which made it all the more important. So get the fuck.

I don't want you to sacrifice your life for me. My life, Wolf, was already

sacrificed. I just changed the timing.

Somebody want to fill me in on what the fuck you're talking about?

Figgs drove into the water because he was trying to get to the hospital to get

the poison mum fed him out of his system.

But he couldn't drive because the freaky mushrooms meant he was off his nut.

You murdered Frankie Figgs.

I defended her.

He died.

Result.

And you didn't think to talk to me about it before you did this. Well, you had a

job to do.

Plus, you would have tried to stop me. Fuck yes, I would.

It's done, Ted.

There's a funeral to prove it. And we're late, so come on.

What about this whole sacrificing your life stuff?

I had to eat so he would eat.

You ate the same poison.

Months, weeks, days, Ted.

It makes no difference to me.

I saved our son.

Get in the car.

What, you want to go to this funeral? Then let's go to the funeral.

You too, get dressed.

Get in the fucking car.

Is it okay if I state the obvious?

This is all Rita's idea.

So where the hell is she?

Oh, heads up. What's time on for Porker? What?

Jim?

Eric? Detective Solomoner?

I've nothing to say to you.

I've got something to say to you.

Yeah, well, maybe I don't want to listen.

Oh, maybe you'd be a dick.

Oh, sorry.

Sorry, I'll be late.

Rita made it very clear. I shouldn't be late.

Fred is not here.

Oh, thank God.

Detective, are you trying to talk to our client without him having a lawyer

present? Oh, lawyer.

Plural. Well, he's here. I'm here. I want to talk to him. Our client has

to say.

That's what I said.

But I just want to tell him that the prosecutor won't be going after jail

for the car theft.

Really? Community service is the recommendation, apparently.

Well, that is good news.

Well, take that on board.

Thank you.

I won't be going to jail.

Unless you want to go to jail?

No. But, you know, I thought as a criminal mastermind that I would be...

don't think anyone would believe that shit?

Of course, if you want to tell me the whereabouts of Bianca Figgs... Our

has nothing to say on anything.

Dodged the bullet there, son.

Thank your lucky stars.

Or should I be thanking Keith or whatever his real name is?

Worst undercover pig ever.

OK, moving away now.

We get lost here.

Something like that.

Well, welcome to the world of fuck -all vibes.

Nice of you to join us.

Why does it feel like there's going to be a fight?

Where the hell did you get to last night?

Nowhere. I tried bringing you house.

I just rode around.

The whole mum thing was doing my head in.

I get that. I just wish you'd talk to me now.

So are we here to fight or what?

I wouldn't mind a fight, to be honest.

Is it wrong of me to say I'm a bit tingly at the idea the boys might start

fighting?

You maggots are not welcome here.

We just want to pay our respects to your father.

After you killed him?

Like, fuck.

He wouldn't have got wasted and driven if it hadn't been for what you did to

Bianca.

Well, Crystal, if that's what you want to believe, that's fine with me. It is.

But we're only here to acknowledge the thing that's been between our two

families for years now.

And you're still not going to get inside that church, you white trash scum.

Crystal just called us white trash scum. I'm sorry you feel that way.

And we're not here to fight.

So, we'll leave you to your service.

But you, Frankie's mate, and all his flash

contacts in that church, you need to know that this is our world,

not yours.

And we're here to stay.

Got it?

Good girl.

Thank you, Frankie.

Burn in hell.

What?

Billy here?

A kid at a funeral?

Are you mental?

No. He's with the nanny I've hired for him, using daddy's money that I'm

inheriting. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, can you tell him that I'm not going to prison?

For now.

That's a bit harsh.

And if you think that you're getting a cent of my money just because your jizz

got me pregnant, you can suck a big fat dick.

I just want to make sure he grows up okay.

And that will have nothing to do with you, now that I'm rich.

Wait up, babe.

You coming with us?

Of course.

For us, what have we got?

Oh, I don't know.

Probably get some better gear for the garage.

Have two flesh.

Maybe go to bed. Give a shower in 427.

What about you? What are you going to do with yours?

I want to shop.

Ends clothing.

Needs to travel to Europe every year to source the clothes.

Flesh?

And, uh, really gay?

I am what I am.

Finn?

I'll move out of my caravan in Pete's place.

Buy something bigger. A house.

I was thinking a bigger caravan, but your house will do the trick.

Okay.

One of the biggest robberies in New Zealand history one day.

Feeling pissed for a party, isn't it?

Well, at least no one can accuse us of being too big for our boots.

Got it? Yeah.

I'd just like to thank Frankie Fink for his fine donation to my wake.

Yes, Frankie Fink. The rules of which are simple, even for a bunch like you

Drink as much as possible and speak about me as if I wasn't here.

They'll keep. Take the boxes out the back and burn them, in case we have

visitors.

Cheer up, Ted.

Isn't everyone's dream to be at their own wake?

Come with me.

Where?

We've got a job to do.

Another one?

I thought we was retired.

Okay, you two, now listen to me.

What's awake?

The opposite of asleep, doofus. Okay, just listen.

Okay, I need you to not get under my feet today. I need you to go to your

and play or just do anything that doesn't get in the way of the grown

it? Good boys.

Hide and seek? Okay.

You hide, I'll seek. I know the best place to hide. Bet you don't. Count of a

hundred. One.

Oh, nothing to worry about. I'll keep the bastard with the so -called trust

trying to separate you from your money.

Seriously, ladies.

As we'll be out there with the bloke, pissing it up a wall.

Sorry, young fella. Adults only.

R18. It'll be gone.

Go on. Scoot!

Scoot! Scoot!

Thank you, Mr Blight.

Well, you never say thank you much obliged when I part the joint.

That's because you're the only other person watching me after much book

We should raise the glass.

Dead man talking.

To the mother of lost boys.

And always remember, get the money up front.

Mum.

What? It's good advice.

She might grow up to be a rocket scientist for all you know.

Mind you, that you think she has no other path but to be a hooker says a lot

about what you really think about this family.

Help me up.

Need to use the loo?

Scoot.

Your mother's a bitch.

Tell me something the rest of the world hasn't been telling me for years, but

never, ever accuse me of not caring about my family. Everything I have ever

has been for this family, Wolf. And sorry if you don't fucking like the way

have done things, but you, of all people, should know the sacrifices that

made. And you don't have to is what I'm saying. Well, it's done now, Wolf. And

if you want to use that to hate me, then fine.

But you have to look to the future now.

To Cheryl, for as long as that lasts.

And your kids.

Who will haunt you to your grave, trust me.

You just can't get rid of the little fuckers.

No matter how hard you try.

I don't hate you.

I don't want you to go.

Tough shit all around.

Give me back to my chair. Give me another drink.

Is Van here?

No.

Put it over there.

Is this fella still there?

Liberated it.

You remember we don't need the money, right?

Yep.

This isn't about the money.

Are you all right there, Ted?

Not even close.

Frankie Figgs came into our lives.

We didn't invite him in.

He just turned up.

Tried to push us out.

Tried working with him.

Shit, I sold my soul to sit in this fucking office, even after he tried to

me.

Then he tried to kill my boy.

Now, with him, he took... Took what, mate?

He deserved to die.

You're trusting Carol with the Fothered Rose?

You're trying to take us all with you, aren't you?

Carol's cooking's improved over the years.

Oh, somebody fuck, fuck.

Oh, God.

I'm a little bit high there, Carol. Oh, what?

And I'm happy to go on my own.

Why?

The Rita I once knew would have been kicking and screaming at the idea of

I guess.

When you know it's inevitable, but there's nothing even I can do to

stop it.

Kicking and screaming becomes pointless.

So you do what you can with the time left and

learn to be happy with that.

Nyree, are you crying?

No.

Yes?

Bugger it.

Over me?

Yes, you're a cow most of the time.

But you've still been my best friend for years.

If I want to cry, it's my right, because I don't want you to die, you selfish

twat!

I burnt the first lot, so Cheryl's taken over.

Then take them out, so the boys won't mind.

Dealing with shit the way that men deal with shit?

By beating the shit out of a machine.

You're onto it?

Me the machine with Frankie figs the bilky it's like the whole age thing. Oh,

there's actually quite healthy Can I have a tip sure

yes, we have a new player

You

know, it's usually thinking about right

I like the way men deal with shit.

My turn.

You got lefty a few good ones?

Oh, it's Rita I was thinking about.

Sorry, that was deeply insensitive.

Why Rita?

The way she's treating us like it's nothing.

Like if she doesn't show any fear or anger or any fucking emotion, somehow it

makes it easier for the rest of us.

I'm sorry it must be words for you, but it's driving me crazy.

Oh, it's okay.

I understand, dear. I really do.

And yes, it's driving me nuts, too.

You are a saint, Ted West.

Round here, only chance of that.

Hey!

Watch it!

Watch it!

Watch it!

Carol,

is there a problem? Yes, there is. A problem called you.

Even when you were whacked out on coke, getting into fights with Russian

hookers, that was nothing compared to this.

Carol, what are you on about? I didn't believe it.

And now that I've seen it with my own eyes, I still actually can't believe it.

Believe what?

That Rita was right.

That you're going after Ted.

She's not even in the crowd, Nyree. Have you no shame?

When did you see me going after Ted? Outside. When I was comforting him

his wife is being a cunt.

What? He is suffering and she is so wrapped up in her great ex that she

see it.

Well, yeah, but that still doesn't give you the right. What right?

To make your move on him.

And this is what Rita thinks is happening, isn't it? Ted was yours once.

Briefly.

A long, long time ago.

I take it she doesn't approve of this. She asked me to do the job. The job? Of

being Ted's next.

I said no.

So, are you going after him or not?

Hmm.

I guess it would be trading up from Lefty.

I hate all my clients!

They're coming here!

Evening. Ted.

Detective Solomona.

Tony had a warrant.

Welcome you there.

Bless you, Ted.

Have you watched the news today on TV?

Been a bit busy.

Funerals and so forth.

They really welcomed you there, didn't they?

Still a bit of water to flow under that bridge, I'd say.

Weird circumstance around that whole thing.

The guy went mental and shot up his plate.

Well, his whole life was falling apart.

After his daughter brought shame on his good family name.

I guess.

And then there was this robbery last night. A real flash job.

Oh, yeah?

I'm not even going to ask if you know anything about it.

I see.

You do know how things work around here.

Where it is, it was an Aussie crew.

Is that so?

You haven't heard anything about any Aussies on your turf?

You're assuming that I have turf?

Nothing. A threat to the business I could maybe help with?

I'm a locksmith, detective.

Like you, I keep the bad guys out.

I love you, Ted.

I fucking love your whole family.

Say my goodbye to Rita. I hear she's not long for this world.

And now you've overstayed your welcome.

I've been accused of being an overstable foster.

Should I even ask?

According to our pig friend, the vault job was an Aussie

crew.

This is the Aussies, taking credit for everything us Kiwis do.

Well, in all fairness, Ted, you were the one that told me to spread the rumour

it was an Aussie crew.

Well, it still stings, but... Underarm bastards.

Yeah.

Ben's missing.

Missing what?

Gone missing.

Him and Jude were playing hide -and -seek.

Didn't we ban that after last time? What can I say, they're your kids.

He said he had the bestest place to hide.

Have you looked up the chimney?

So somewhere equally as stupid.

Somewhere he's been told not to.

Are you sure he's not up the chimney again?

I'll check outside.

You need some self -respect, girl.

Throwing yourself at every man under the sun.

Not every man.

No one respects a slut, is what I'm saying.

Get.

You all right now?

Got over your little moment?

Oh, yes, Rita West.

I'm on to your game now.

Trying to control things from beyond the grave.

I'm not actually in the grave yet.

Carol. And Ted.

Seriously.

Better than certain other people getting their hooks into him, I thought.

If a good man is dead.

To a predator, yeah.

The thing is, Rita, for all his faults, and there are many,

I fucking love Lefty.

He strays, sure, but who doesn't these days?

And we always get back together.

And don't tell him this, but he still rocks my world.

But the moment he dies, and he will die before me,

Ted Wister's fair fucking game.

Hi, love.

Can I borrow you for a second?

Hi, Rita.

I'm thinking I might buy you a bigger caravan.

Nah, I like this one.

Why don't you just buy yourself a house instead?

Yeah, yeah, okay.

Yeah, I'll probably use the caravan when it's just me and the young people.

It is a peaceful place.

I can be such an idiot at times. Oh, no way, Carol. What's the matter? Oh, just,

you know, I may have wound Nairie up and set her loose.

If she starts acting strange towards you, just ignore her.

Why would she do that?

Hi, Ethan.

Is this the Rita thing? Not important right now, Phineas. What Rita thing?

She reckons Naira will get her hooked into you once she's gone. Ted doesn't

to know this, Phineas. I think Ted does need to know this. She even suggested

Carol, saying she's single and might want to do the job on you.

I said no, if that helps.

Excuse me.

Oh dear, I feel terrible.

No, no. You needed to know.

True.

I mean, if you do really feel terrible, there is one way that

might help.

Blondie, relax.

He'll turn up when he's hungry. Boys always do. Thanks, Rita. Real helpful.

Oh, for God's sake!

Shut the fucking door!

Wolfie! Have you guys seen Van down here?

The stupidest place in the world to hide would be...

Holy... Shit.

Ben, fucking speak to me. You've been doing that the whole time. Don't just

stand there. Do something useful.

Come on, buddy. Speak to me. Speak to me.

This blanket's full of farts.

No, he's not at the bloody chimney. If he looked properly, he might have gone

all the way out this time. Just look for him, will you?

There he is.

He's okay.

Thank God. Just mostly frozen.

I won, right?

I'll make him some cocoa.

Oh, wow.

Aren't you the hero?

Rita.

Ted. Come with me.

Do I have to?

Yes, I do.

The thing I don't get, Rita, is how you can bloody plan, scheme everything.

Somehow you still can't talk to me.

Is this about figs?

And Nyree?

And Carol?

The whole fucking circus you've got going? Right, right.

You've learned about that then. Well, that is me, Ted, trying to save you from

fate worse than death is what.

Excuse the... Well, stop.

Just stop it.

Why are you doing this?

Well, I was just about to explain.

You're trying to organize my life for me. Force of habit. And if it makes any

difference, that whole thing was just a big fat mistake.

Well, it doesn't.

Well, it's your problem, not mine. Why didn't you tell me about figs, about

you did?

You were kind of busy, Ted.

Provided... Bullshit! Look, if I'd told you about it, you would have got all

macho on it and probably marched in there and got yourself killed in the

process. Which is exactly what you did without telling me. With the teensy

difference that, hey, I'm already dying, so no great loss.

Time, Ted.

You know, all we lost was some time, and not exactly what you'd call quality

time, either.

Every second.

that I get to spend with you is quality time.

Well, that is just bloody sucky of you, Ted. Yeah, well, it's how I feel. What

time? More time than I can just spend in pain?

More time I can spend throwing up?

That's not what I want you to remember when you think of me. No, the Rita that

want to remember is the fighter.

You think that I'm not fighting this?

I have been stashing these for ages, Ted.

For the day that it gets too bad.

And believe me, there have been days when the pain is so bad.

All I can think about is how easy it would be.

Glass of brandy and a handful of these.

But then I think about one more day.

Waking up next to you.

I've been fighting death.

Please believe me, I've been fighting really hard.

And the big thing, well, it was

my chance to do one last thing for this

family, to go out knowing that...

I'd done everything I could to keep my boys safe.

And if I'd told you, you would have stopped me.

I would have tried.

Yeah.

Exactly.

I don't want you to go.

I don't want to go either, Ted.

I want so much more time with you.

But there is no more time.

We've had our lot.

And they were great times.

Dead.

Even the shit ones.

They were full of love and passion.

We've lived a life.

And now it's time for you to go on without me, but... I'd change it if I

Tiff, I would, but I... I can't, I'm so sorry. I can't,

I can't.

This is what I didn't want, this is so what I didn't want.

Yeah, too fucking bad.

Thanks to you.

It's thanks to you, Ted.

Without you, you'd think they'd show up for me.

Yeah.

They did.

Drink? God, yes.

Like over smokes?

You know, I think I...

She's just lying there awake.

Don't you want to join the party?

You know you're the last hope for this sorry bunch, right?