Original subtitles

I didn't know the Three Stooges had a backup team.

You cut the smart remarks.

Benson, you've got a tie -breaking vote. What are you going to do?

It's pretty obvious what Benson's going to do. What are you going to do, Benson?

I'm going to do the right thing.

I'd think twice before doing the right thing.

Too bad your parents didn't think twice.

Clayton, I don't think you realize the impact of what Senator Jenkins is trying

to do. If this bill passes, his committee will be able to have the power

any school library book that they find objectionable. Sir, I do realize that,

but the way the bill is constructed, if Benson votes against it, the schools

will not get their proper funding.

That's a catch -22 anyway.

Which, incidentally, is one of the books the senator wants banned.

Boy, I can't believe some of the booklets Bozo has on this list.

Huckleberry Finn.

Little women.

Now, don't worry about it. I have the deciding vote.

Yeah, but that's all very well, Benson. But what about the funding for the

school? Well, we'll just have to try and find the money somewhere where there

are no strings attached.

Hey, Dad, want to go get some lunch?

Honey, let me ask you a question. Sure. Are there any books in your school

library that anybody could find, I don't know, dirty?

No way. There were dirty books in the library. Boys would get library cards.

I know Senator Jenkins is well -intentioned, but what the man's trying

just wrong.

Well, going up against him won't be easy. I wouldn't trade places with

for anything.

Actually, sir, I think it is the better part of valor to steer clear of this

whole situation. If Benson wants to take on Senator Jenkins, I say fine, let him

flap in the wind.

Oh, nonsense, Clayton.

Benson, you want my opinion on this? Well, um, to be perfectly frank, no.

Fine. All right, you want to make your own decision, I respect that.

Come on, Katie, maybe I can help you with something.

Don't worry, Benson.

If Senator Jenkins bans these books, it'll be over my dead body.

Don't tempt me, Krause.

Benson, I've got to hand it to you. You were something on that Senate floor. You

stuck to your guns and gave it to them with both barrels.

Well, I'm glad it worked out. You put your career on the line.

It's part of the job.

Cast an historical vote.

Cross, you're embarrassing me. Your action will shape young minds for

generations to come. You know, they might even put up a statue of you.

I'm sure the pigeons will enjoy that.

Knock it off, Benson. I'm proud of you.

Devoir. Great speech.

Thank you, Leonard.

Even Senator Tyler was impressed when he voted against you.

No, no, I wasn't impressed. I just enjoy seeing someone go up against Senator

Jenkins once in a while.

Last guy that had the guts to do that was Assemblyman Blanchard.

Poor guy.

Assemblyman Blanchard?

I've never heard of him.

Well, not many people have.

Disagreeing with Senator Jenkins has a way of lowering the life expectancy of

one's career.

Yeah. One day Blanchard was Speaker of the House and the next day he was

painting a house.

Take care.

Don't listen to him and don't worry.

I'm not worried.

Did you see Senator Jenkins' face when you were reading your decision?

His face got so red I thought it was going to explode.

He was so stupid.

He was so red, he looked like a tomato.

Senator Tomato was right behind you.

Senator Tomato.

Senator Jenkins.

That's gross.

Lieutenant Governor Dubois. Senator Jenkins.

That bill meant a lot to me, Dubois.

Well, Senator, I just felt that the school should get their money

unconditionally. Do you know who you work for, Lieutenant Governor?

Senator, please, I work for the people of this state.

That's right.

And they're tired of filth.

They're tired of it in their libraries.

They're tired of it at their newsstands. They're tired of it on television. You,

Mr. Lieutenant Governor, fail to represent those people.

Fortunately, that's for the people of this state to decide, not you. I want

to know that I am holding you personally responsible for the death of my bill.

It was a mercy killing.

Well, you...

Seem to have made a few friends today.

But let me tell you, you have made one very powerful enemy.

Is that a threat?

Oh, I don't make threats.

I don't have to.

I make promises, and I keep them.

Just ask former Speaker Blanchard about me.

You'll find him in the Yellow Pages under House Painters.

What do you think he's going to do?

I don't know.

I don't know one thing.

What's that?

I don't know nothing about painting new houses.

I

can't

stand another hour that those people have been out there picketing for three

days. Well, Senator Jenkins.

Knows how to stir up the people. Look at this. They got some new signs out

there.

Dubois supports filth.

That's a dirty lie.

Benson soft on porno.

It's ridiculous.

Garage sales Saturday 3 to 6.

Garage sales? It say where?

I wonder how long this is gonna go on.

Well, it says three to six.

You're no help at all.

Benson, you made a decision. You just have to accept the fact that some people

strenuously disagree with that decision. You mustn't take it so personally. They

don't hate you.

They just hate everything you stand for.

Well, thank you for the pep talk, Gipper.

It looks like a television set, only smaller.

Look, there's a little tiny Senator Jenkins.

Turn him out.

Senator Randall Jenkins and hundreds of his supporters conducted a book burning

today to protest Lieutenant Governor Dubois' recent vote in the state

legislature. Other people voted, too!

Among the authors whose works were incinerated were Mark Twain, James

and Kurt Vonnegut. Senator Jenkins was quoted as saying, the people are behind

me on this one. Not this people.

We now return you to your regular scheduled program, Stunt Show Bloopers.

This is unbelievable.

Certainly is.

We've got to get me one of these things.

Clayton, this is a serious matter.

Oh, you're absolutely right, sir. I agree.

Now, dragging Benson's name through the mud is one thing, but burning books is

just plain tacky.

Benson, there are some reporters here.

Well, not now, Mrs. Cassidy.

Benson, this is your chance to give your side of the story.

They only want to ask you a few questions.

Good, because I'd like to give them a few answers.

Well, wait a minute. Hold the phone. This is hardly the time to meet the

I think he's right. One wrong remark.

It'd make things worse.

Mmm, those media people smell blood.

Your blood, blood.

Benson can take care of himself.

Well, for once, Krause is right. I'm the lieutenant governor.

I ought to be able to handle a press conference without losing it.

Send them suckers in, Ms. Cassidy.

Fine, fine, Benson. What do I know?

My sentiments exactly.

All right, this way.

Maybe I'll pull up a couple of chairs.

You better pull up an auditorium.

Exactly. What did you mean by that, Lieutenant Governor Dubois?

What did I mean by what? I haven't said anything yet. What do you think about

the protesting?

I hate it.

You hate the protesters?

I hate the protesting, not the protesters.

Sir, if things don't look up in the next ten seconds, I suggest we make tracks.

I think it's going very well.

Senator Governor, why do you support pornography?

Did Senator Jenkins tell you to ask me that?

All righty, if you'll excuse us, I have to get the governor to his guitar

lesson.

Why do you hate Senator Jenkins?

I don't hate Senator Jenkins. I just hate the way he uses fear and calls it

justice. You're saying Senator Jenkins doesn't know the difference between fear

and justice?

Well, if you're not going to listen to my answer, why don't you just get the

hell out of my office?

What have you got against morality, anyway?

Okay, that's it. You can continue without me.

Excuse me, Lieutenant Governor. Wait, Lieutenant Governor, wait. Don't go

Lieutenant Governor, one more statement.

Wait, one more statement.

So how's it going, Bunsen?

Well... Oh, you don't have to tell me. I know they're blasting you on radio and

television. The press is raking you over the coals. Yeah, yeah.

And it's not just the press either. Huh?

Last night I went to the laundry. Yeah? The lady told me to take my business

elsewhere. Oh, that's terrible.

Yeah, she said that if I brought my shorts back over there, she'd scorch

Listen, I've just been watching the noon report on TV.

More bad news, huh? Yeah, well, there's good news, too. The commentator said you

were irresponsible and hasty in your school budget decision.

That's good news? No, no, no.

It's going to be beautiful and sunny today with a cooling trend towards the

weekend.

Well, well, I hate to be the one to tell you this, my friend, but you are down

for the count.

First weather, now sports.

There is talk of impeachment.

Benson impeached? No.

Well, there's nothing here in the paper. Oh, no, no, it's not in the papers yet.

No, it's still in that tantalizing scuttlebutt stage.

The House? The Senate?

Mm -mm. The barbershop.

Well, the talk stops here.

You understand, Clayton?

Yes, sir.

Listen to this letter to the editor.

Lieutenant Governor Benson Dubois' ill -fated decision was compounded by his

disastrous follow -up press conference. He has once again exhibited a glaring

lack of governmental experience.

It is obvious that our own beloved Governor Gatling had nothing whatsoever

with these political fiascos.

Sincerely, Clayton Endicott III.

Well, I'm entitled to my opinion.

knows a perfect way to get even with Senator Jenkins.

Forget Senator Jenkins. I want to get even with Clayton.

Revenge is never the answer to anything.

No, no, no. Unless you can do it without getting caught.

It's my opinion.

Well, my advice to you, Benson, is stand your ground. Yeah.

Stand your ground.

Yeah. Stand your ground until they bury you in it.

I think that is rather cynical.

What do you expect from an obnoxious pompous snob with an overblown ego and

overactive mouth?

I don't like the sound of that.

You're not going to like it in print either.

You wouldn't dare.

Hey, babe, it's my opinion.

Join us again tomorrow for another episode of The Edge of Our Lives.

Better be careful, Mrs. Cassidy. You're going to knock some dust off that desk.

I was waiting for Daytime Magazine.

I love that gal. Oh, she's a pistol.

Welcome to Daytime Magazine.

With me today is Senator Randall Jenkins.

We'll be talking with Senator Jenkins later on in our program, but first we'll

be meeting a doctor who has scientific proof that back pain can be controlled

through the proper use of vegetables.

This is very interesting.

You got a bad back?

No. Could you ask Miss Krause to come in here, please?

She got a bad back?

Yeah, and a bad front, but I still need her in here.

I'll send her in right away. All right.

I understand you want me. This is no time for jokes, Krause.

Senator Jenkins is on live TV right now, and we have to get over to the station.

I think it's about time that we brought our disagreement into the public. Are

you sure you want to do this? Your career could be on the line.

I have no choice.

Wait a minute, wait a minute. If your career is over, do I get your job? If my

career is over, your career is over.

Well, don't just stand there. Let's move it.

May I help you?

Yeah. Is this of every fine daytime magazine?

Yes, it is. But I'm sorry our audience is packed today.

No, no. You don't understand.

This is not for the day.

I'm bringing this woman here. I'm making a delivery.

She's here for the facial makeup renovation part of the program.

I don't think we're shooting that today.

Oh, well, no. You don't understand. It's not for the day.

We have to get her started now so she'll be ready for next week.

Okay. just go around that corner down there, and you'll see the set. Okay.

you. Come on, Russ. I have something I want to say to you.

Okay,

everybody, here we go.

Five, four, three, two... Welcome back. I am Marjorie Manning, and we are

talking with Senator Randall Jenkins.

Senator, before the commercial break, we just had time to discuss your

background and your powerful position in the Senate.

The first question I would like to ask you is, where did you get those shoes?

Your shoes, they are gorgeous.

And I think everyone would like to know where a senator buys his shoes.

Am I right?

Oh, look who's here.

What a surprise. It's our own Lieutenant Governor, Benson DuBois.

Uh, Ms. Manning, may I join you?

Well, certainly I think you know Senator Jenkins.

Yes, how do you do, Senator? Lieutenant Governor.

Well, how interesting to have two high -ranking government officials with us at

the same time.

We were just discussing shoes.

Well,

that's very interesting.

Mrs. Manning, if you don't mind, I'd like to change the topic.

Well, go ahead. I think that would be fun.

I'd like to ask the Senator a question.

Senator, why are you... you attempting to use the school budget as a weapon

against pornography?

I'd be happy to answer that.

This state, our whole country for that matter, is decaying due to vulgar

pornographic garbage that is being passed off as literature in our school

library. It is eating away at the morality of our young.

With all due respect, Senator, I don't think that you have the right to make

value judgments for anyone but yourself.

And that's where you're wrong.

As an elected official of this state, I have a mandate from the voters.

When it comes to making decisions for them, I not only have the right, I have

that responsibility.

Now, this is really funny.

When you said we were going to talk about something other than shoes, I

you meant other types of footwear.

Where am I today?

Well, I'm sorry, Ms. Manning. I'm sure I must have caught you off guard.

That is okay.

We will be all over the evening news.

Well, I'm not so sure about that.

Talking about books isn't as colorful as burning them.

I didn't do that as a publicity stunt.

I want that garbage out of our lives.

I agree with you, Senator. Some of the filth I see out there makes me sick,

But that's not the issue here. The issue here is censorship.

Have you forgotten that we are guaranteed certain freedoms in the

The First Amendment was not intended to protect smut peddlers.

Once again, Senator, that's not the issue. The issue is censorship.

Who is to decide what smut is and what smut isn't? There are still just and

decent people in this country quite capable of filling that role.

Like yourself, Senator?

Oh, I think I'd make an excellent judge.

You've seen my list of offensive materials, I believe.

Yes, I have, and I must admit that there are some things that I find

objectionable which are not on the list.

Just tell me what they are. I'll be glad to add them.

Oh, so you think I'd make an excellent judge, too?

Well, I'm sure you would. You're a decent, responsible man.

Thank you.

Ms. Manning, are there any books that you find objectionable that the senator

hasn't included?

Well, I really don't have time to read books, but there are some TV shows where

the women just run and bounce, and I just don't consider that entertainment.

And I agree with you.

I think we should put shows of that type on the list.

So you think Mrs. Manning would be an excellent judge, too?

Why don't you just drop the theatrics and make your point?

Well, the point is this, Senator.

Everyone has something they find objectionable. How about you people in

audience? Anything you'd like to contribute to the bonfire?

The dictionary.

Should we have somebody writing this down?

Well, I don't think we need anyone to write it down, Mrs. Manning.

I'm sure the Senator sees my point.

No, I don't.

At the risk of being redundant, Senator, the point is simply this, that everyone

find some book or film objectionable. If all these excellent judges added their

choices to your list, we'd have nothing left to read, see, or hear.

So you'd let anybody hide behind the First Amendment?

Oh, Senator, they're not hiding. They're exercising their rights.

And you support that?

Yes, I do.

Well, if the Klan marched down Main Street delivering their vile message,

you support that?

Support it? No.

Recognize their right to do it? Yes, I would. So your answer to the problem is

to do nothing.

I say put the responsibility back in the family where it belongs.

Look, this legislation is meant to help the family. Oh, come on, Senator.

Morality isn't spread through legislation.

It's spread by example.

Don't we have any responsibility?

Well...

Abe Lincoln said that the responsibility of government is to do for the people

what they cannot do for themselves. It seems to me that this is something that

people can do for themselves.

But they need the power of government to back them up. No, they don't.

They have a stronger power.

The power of the consumer to buy or not to buy.

I think the Lieutenant Governor makes a good point.

And I think that we would all like to be concerned consumers.

Am I right?

Well, I'm not sure I agree with you, Lieutenant Governor, but I am willing to

sit down with you and see if we can make progress on this issue. My door is

always open to you, Senator.

Well, I, for one, think both these public officials deserve our

This is great.

I'm so glad it happened on my show.

We'll do shoes tomorrow.

Coming up next... Listen, I just had to say to you, you were wonderful.

Ma 'am.

We are still on the air. Oh, yes. Oh, we are?

Hi, Mrs.

Cassidy.