All language subtitles for The Comic Strip s03e01 The Strike

We're all very needed about your script,
aren't we, David? Oh, we all love the

script, all of it. It's so wonderful.
It's quite fabulous.

Absolutely. It's brilliant.

Quite brilliant.

Yes, well, what initially attracted me
to the idea... That's it. There's an

unashamedly powerful socialist ethic.

And as a director, the way Paul's
captured the sheer size of the

Anything but a Coca -Cola, thank you.

Millions of people unemployed, families
ripped apart, whole communities on

tranquilizers. Thank you.

It's magnificent. No, it's smashing
stuff.

I mean, when I got to the end, I felt as
if I had been through the miners'

strike myself.

Oh, absolutely.

I mean, if we're going to revitalise the
British film industry from an American

perspective, then miners' strike is
undoubtedly the sort of film that we

be doing this year. Oh, I agree.

It's got terrific potential.

What about Al Pacino's Arthur's Gaga?

Cabochino box.

Send us four scouts, Paul.

Bye, Paul. Bye, Paul.

You all right, Paul?

Yeah. Best of luck, folks.

Ta. It's great they're making that thing
you wrote into a film.

Yeah.

I'll probably be back here again
tomorrow night if nothing had happened.

There are a lot of big talkers in the
film business, you know.

Oh, come on, man. You've got to be more
positive. You're going to have your name

up in lights.

Yeah, we'll see.

Oh, what have we got?

Here we are.

Oh, what's that?

The lad's done a pub with a little whip
thrown. He's got to buy her owner up in

London.

When you get that money, you can buy us
all a little bungalow in Spain.

Yeah, well, I'll see you around then,
Ray. Best of luck.

Don't forget to change those underpants.

At least once a month.

Attention, please, attention.

We need to get driver of car number 421.

Paul!

Hi.

Hi. It's great to meet you, Eliza. It's
Bernard.

Bernard Deacon, the director.

You've met some people that are going to
make a film out of my script.

Yeah, that's right.

It's a company called Golden Pictures.

They made a lot of money out of doing
violent sex films, and now they want to

something to improve their image.

It could be great for us, though.

Yeah, well, you tell if a quarter of
that money could have it blown away.

Sorry about that, family man.

Well, I don't like to hang around. I'm
here to tell you that Golden Pictures

would like to be part of your movie.

Now, uh, my partner and I are both of
the opinion that, uh, this prodigy...

There's a very good chance of doing very
good box office business in the United

States. However... However... We feel,
too, that for this to be a

possibility, we'll have to make one or
two tiny changes to the screenplay.

Well, we did feel that there would be
some rewrites, you know.

Which bit did you think might need more?

Well, every five pages or so, there
should be an event.

An event.

Um, maybe... A mining disaster.

A whole heap of miners trapped
underground in a big flash flood.

People crying.

Death.

Destruction. That kind of thing. What,
am I right?

Boys.

Um, excuse me, Mr. Goldstein. The whole
point of the story is that the miners

are on strike.

It's the miners' strike.

And, uh, that means... The mines are
closed. They're not working.

So you're saying that this Scarface...
Scargill.

Scargill, Schmargill. You're saying that
this guy, the hunky hero, the head of

the miners, you're saying that he's too
chicken -shit scared to go down the mine

and dig out Meryl Streep?

I'm sorry, what's Meryl Streep got to do
with it? I don't know. She's available

in July.

There must be a part for a woman.

Good point.

Go point page 50.

Wife of Scab Miner.

Girl. Enter girl.

Girl.

Would you care for a cup of tea? We can
make something out of that.

Like what?

What do you say?

This thing's a go -go dancer.

Stripper, whatever.

She gets involved with Scarface and he
gets her pregnant. How's that?

It's the beginning.

We're on the way.

Something wrong, Paul?

Well, yes.

I do have one or two little niggles.
Yes, Bernard.

You see, for years, I've had this, like,
mental picture of Arthur Scargill as

this middle -aged, balding Yorkshireman.
Yeah, yeah.

But it seems all these years I was
wrong.

Because Arthur Scargill is, in fact... a
mumbling ball of sexual tension from

Brooklyn. Yeah, look, Paul... Hold on,
hold on. Ooh, when he's not picketing

mines, he's down them with his little
pick and his little shovel, digging out

film stars.

Yeah, yeah. And when he catches these
film stars, he takes them down the disco

for a good shafting. Yeah, I know it all
seems a bit mad at this stage.

It's not a bit... Fucking mad, Bernard.
That bloke is out of his fucking tree.

He needs some specialised medical
attention.

Look, I'm as pissed off about this as
you are, Paul.

Well, I don't think you are, Bernard.

Look, I agree with everything you say,
right? But quite honestly, you're just

going to have to trust me on this one,
you know?

Because they're just the money men,
right? And what we're going to do is

their money and make our film.

This film.

The film you wrote, Paul.

Believe me, I know what I'm doing.

Doesn't say mining town to me.

This is Adrian Jones, the art director.

Hi, how do you do?

This is Paul, the writer. How do you do?
Love the script.

Thank you.

Is this where you based the story?

This is where it actually happened.
Right here.

And you know that bit on page 71, right?

Well, Scargill arrived here, right?

And I was standing.

Here, right?

Well, over at that pub, there was about
20 miners, and we saw 500 coppers.

Hard -faced bastards with visors and
shields and bands, and they're walking

this right now. Oh, Mrs Griffith, I
think she'd come out the same, right?

do you think?

It's just all this double glazing.

I know, it's completely bad taste.

One of the landowners just clips right
out and spins him, and he spins him.

Spinning like this. He's spinning round
and round and round. And he smacks into

a wand. The film is set in the 80s, but
it feels like the 30s. Yeah, yes,

exactly. All films do.

Lashing out in the horse's hooves.

Gushing heads open.

Splitting them. I swear to you, that
train there, that train there was

with it, brother. It was like a bloody
fountain. And overhead, I swear, there

were vultures.

Vultures, sorry.

Circling, circling. Paul?

Paul? What was here before this video
shop?

Up until about five years ago.

Radio rental.

Could very easily be redressed as a
blacksmith shop.

What? Well, maybe after Scargo's father
was a blacksmith.

He wasn't.

Yes, but it doesn't say that in the
script, does it?

Put a cherry picker up the main high
street. Oh, marvellous.

Here,

here. This is an old mate of mine, Ray.

Oh, hi, Ray. Hello.

He was with me on the picket line.

Oh, great.

Here. You've got to part for him,
because he's a brilliant actor.

Go on, Ray, do your Richard Burton.

No. No,

because you've got to audition if you
want to be in the movies, isn't that

right? We'll find something for you to
do, won't we, Benny?

Oh, absolutely.

Yeah, you're going to be in the movies.

Yeah, Ray's going to be in the movies.

Yay!

Yeah, Ray, Ray.

Boys, you'll never guess what we've got
playing Arthur Scargill in this film.

Get out, Pacino.

Cappuccino wasn't very happy about the
hotel.

Well, I think he thought the atmosphere
wasn't quite right.

Well, you know, the chlorine.

No, no, no, no, no. He didn't get out of
the car.

At the moment, we're on the way to
Swansea.

That's right. Stop!

Right, sir. I'll talk to the owner.

It's a private house, so it might take a
few moments.

Hello.

That will fix her.

Got it. Absolutely bearded man.

Tennis court. Yes, over there, sir.
Thank you.

Tennis,

do you know?

Me? To me?

Hang on, hang on, hang on.

Oh, what a beauty.

It's lovely, isn't it?

I've read it now a couple of times.

Not all of it.

It's great.

I don't know.

It's just something about these last ten
pages, you know.

I feel something kind of important
missing.

I don't know. Maybe it's a typing file.

Do you have all the pages?

Yeah, I think so.

Okay, what I'm really trying to say is
that it seems to me this Arthur Scargill

character seems to me to be some kind of
loser.

Yeah, that's the way it reads to me.

Yeah, he loses, yeah.

You know what Al's trying to say?

Forgive me, Al. No, please.

It's that we don't like the end of the
picture.

Hmm.

In what way?

Well, he loses, so he's the schmuck. Let
me say this.

I like what you guys are trying to do,
you know?

I'm a Democrat, so... But all my
instincts are this... This

gargoyle guy, this...

You know, this great human being, after
all the shit he's been through, should

in the end somehow, some way, win the
strike.

And get the girl out.

Right.

Yes, well, with all due respect, Mr
Pacino, this strike was probably the

biggest blow for the British labour
movement in the last 60 years.

Could you get me a pair of water?

With line? Yeah.

And people in this country are extremely
aware, actually, of how the strike did

in fact end and that Scargill did in
fact lose. Oh, really?

Watch my lips.

Nobody in Wyoming gives a goddamn shit
about that. Old boy.

Yes, well, I'm sorry, Mr. Goldstein, but
Paul and I here do give a goddamn shit

and we're actually not prepared to
compromise on what is... essentially the

whole point of this film.

Verity!

Yes?

Pay this guy off, will you?

So I'll hush your accommodations, is
that all right for you?

That's not bad.

Apparently it's very difficult to get
the first place.

That's true, yeah.

To your hygienic specifications.

Yeah, well...

I heard they're trying to rearrange the
local bakery, you know. Yeah. So, uh,

hopefully that, um, that'll, uh, get us
sorted out. Right. I guess.

Right.

So, Mr. Thomas, uh, you gonna rewrite
the end of our film?

Well, um, put it this way, um, I've put
a lot of work into this.

I'm sure.

Writing's hard.

And the thing is, I'm not very happy
about the way things have been going.

For instance, I haven't been paid for
all the work I've done, and I think, all

in all, it might be better if we just
call the whole thing off, because, well,

it hasn't worked out the way I'd hoped.

Hurry!

It's going to be a great movie.

We need you.

What kind of ending did you have in
mind?

Telephone call from the Goldstein
reception.

Here's the new ending, Mr Pacino.

Sit down.

Want a drink?

Yeah, a lager, please.

Two lager beers.

I liked you.

I like what you said.

You speak your mind. That's good.

I like that.

Good.

Listen, Paul, do you mind if I tell you
something?

No, no, no. Speak your mind.

You know, I really don't think this
picture should be...

A musical.

A musical?

I don't know. Do I? Yeah.

I like it.

Tell him he either tears up his rose
bushes or he's fired!

Yes, it's very good. I want 400 along
the land of the street, OK?

Cobbles everywhere.

Cobbles everywhere.

No receipts, no cash.

You said face work. I said, oh, that'll
make a change.

Jesus,

where am I?

And I'm telling you, you either do it my
way or you never work again.

Honey!

Meet Jerry, our new director.

How do you do?

What's this? The miners' strike. What's
that?

Oh, it's a kind of... It's a sort of
action love story about a bunch of reds

try and overrun the... government. Yeah,
so what happens? Guys ride into town,

step by the houses, shoot the bastards
when they run out, huh?

Better ask Paul. Hey, this is Paul, our
English script writer.

Hi, how'd you do? Hi. Give me a pizza,
huh?

Wow, the miners try goddamn union
bastards.

Can't stand them.

Okay, honey.

Page 61 says here old man cycles up to
post office. Change that to, uh...

Car crash through plate glass window. If
I have to open that door, that counts

as a walk -on. It's an extra 20 quid.
And I'm not shaving my head. Not for 50

quid a day. Not for anybody.

Well, don't blame me, love. I never did
it for Caligula. Why should I do it for

Scargill? It's impossible to pay him in
Swiss francs.

He hasn't settled the contracts yet.

Well, then you pay him.

Well, you're the one living in a bloody
tax haven.

Bollockhead. Excuse me, love. Me and
him, you know, we're Paul's mates,

He told us to come and see you, but I'll
part in a film.

We have all the miners we need. Well,
listen, Glenn, hang about a minute now,

all right? See me and him, you know?
We're the real thing, we're real miners,

not them buffeters over there.

Well, you just don't look like miners,
that's all. Hang about, Mrs. Wright.

Don't you try and tell me anything about
the mines and the miners.

Well, the unions wouldn't allow it.
That's the point. It's not up to you. I

it's not only up to you. We don't want
your type in this film. Get out of it.

Let's talk about it over a pint, then.

Yes. This way, please, Miss Streep.

Welcome to the Valleys.

Cruyff, you're a company.

You enjoy Wales, and Wales will enjoy
you.

Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.

Derek, I have both bags now. Good boy.

Suite 17, please. Can I use

your

bed? I can't sleep in that little house.

Yeah, sure.

Help yourself.

Thank you very much.

Well... You're a writer.

And, uh... I'm an actor, you know.

You write.

And, uh... I act.

Um... You know, sometimes... An actor
can

see... in a screenplay that a writer
never dreamed would say.

You know what I'm trying to say?

Yes, yes, yes. I understand your
message, yes.

For instance, you know that scene on
page 31 when I make this very emotional

plea to Mel, you know?

Mm -hmm.

And she said something to me like,

God, no author, something like that.
That's right, yeah.

I was just thinking that this kind of,
this very beautifully written scene

be kind of more dramatic, you know?

If it was just like this... ..wounded
silence, you know?

But that's her only line in the scene.

If you take that out, she'll have...

Nothing to say?

Yeah

Be quiet, please. Turning over.

241, take three.

And action, Al.

Okay, look at the helmet.

Right, you're depressed, Al.

Right, go to the fridge.

Hit the chair, Al.

Open it.

Right, now you're hot.

You're hot and you're really depressed.

In you go, Merrill.

Me.

Me too.

I know what you're thinking.

I've gone too far that time.

The press hates me.

The government hates me.

Now the goddamn proletariat hate me.

Jesus H. Christ.

You're a schoolteacher.

A great schoolteacher.

But you don't always like to be off the
gargoyle.

Neither the bigger... What the f*** is
that?

It's an orange.

Is that it?

I can see it's a goddamn orange. I want
to know what's doing my scene.

I'm sorry, I just thought it was right
for me to be peeling an orange somehow.

Okay, Jerry, she's peeling an orange. I
want to be loading a handgun. Okay, Al.

A magnum!

I was born in a poor mining town on the
foothills of Wales.

My name is Arthur Scargill, and this is
my story.

My old pa said that miners were loyal
folk and low to anger.

But when the news got out that the
cobalt was going to close down the pits

go, well, I could feel their loyalty
turning to bitter hatred.

It was going to be the end of our little
town.

I guess we all knew it.

Many said I was to blame.

Being the only guy who could read or
write, I guess they looked to me for an

easy answer.

Well, to tell you the truth, I didn't
have one.

It was like I was sitting on a powder
cake, just waiting for a spark.

What's the matter, Arthur?

Too chicken shit scared to bring the
miners out on strike?

Yeah.

He's scared of the prom.

Yeah. He's frightened of a woman.

Yeah.

Oh, whoopsie -daisy, I'm so sorry, Mr.

Compromise.

What is this?

How to sell out to the cold board and
let down all the guys?

busy fooling around with that school
teacher to fight for socialism.

That's right!

You've taken over your union.

The whole town's coming out on strike.

You're going to close to Coalface, huh?

Coalface? Why, we're going to bring down
the whole goddamn government.

Yeah, maybe just bring down that slag
heap. Is that what you want?

You scare us like that, Arthur.

Look, you know as well as I do, Dutch.
If those pits don't get maintained, the

whole mountain's going to go.

You just stick to your books, Arthur.

Leave the geology to us.

You stay out of this.

I can't take much more of this, Arthur.

I love you, but I'm nearly 30.

I want a home for me, for Tammy, for all
of us.

Oh, God, I hate this strike.

I'm sorry, Arthur.

I love the workers as much as you do.

God damn it, Arthur, you're going to
have to choose.

It's me or the Union.

Don't say that!

Don't ever say that to me again.

I love the NUM.

It's my job.

It's my life.

You understand that?

Nobody, not nobody, is going to take
that away from me.

Not you, not the militants, not nobody.

You got that?

No, she's got to hear this.

Would you rather she read about my
tabloids?

Stop it! Tammy's just a child!

Why don't my daughter grow up and think
her father's just a lousy scab?

I'm leaving you, Arthur. I'm sorry.

I hope you get what you want, Arthur.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

Paul.

Paul.

Yeah? I'm coming to get you.

Who's this?

Arthur.

Cuckoo!

I've just seen the film, Paul.

No, Arthur. It wasn't my idea.

You're dead.

Them that made me change the history of
this track.

They made me do the rewrites. You took
the money, Paul.

I'll give it to the miners.

I'll change it all back.

Look out the window.

Okay, listen.

Al wants to do a comedy. I want to see.

I want a good job tonight.

Isn't that a great idea?

What's wrong with you?

Because I'm a wild and crazy guy.

And bludgeon three, where the victims
get drunk and go on a wild burning raid.

Yes.

Hi. I'm having a bit of trouble with
this new scene, Al.

What scene?

Yeah, this new comedy scene.

Somehow I just can't imagine Arthur
Scargill taking a load of drugs and

a panty raid.

You look tired, Paul.

You should get some sleep.

Yeah. Yeah, I will, yeah.

Before you go, Paul...

There's one thing I want to check with
you.

May I?

Yeah, it's just this, um... Just this
history of the labor movement piece, you

know? It seems kind of misleading.

See, Paul, I can just say all that just
by the way I stand.

Believe me, you don't need all that
boring dialogue.

Well, isn't Arthur's little school
teacher?

She sure is sexy for a scab.

Get out of here, you animals.

Arthur's doing his best for you.

Yeah? Well, you tell Arthur we got a
little message for him.

Right, boys?

Yep.

No.

No, stop it.

No, help!

And then all the little piggies went wee
-wee -wee -wee and went all the way

home.

And you know what, honey?

They all lived happily ever after.

Okay, now it's time for bed, hmm?

Kiss Bobo goodnight, too.

Goodnight, little fella.

Go on, you run along now.

It's something everybody needs, Tammy.

Even you, Daddy?

Even me, Tammy.

You run along now, okay?

Your daddy's got to write to the Queen,
you hear?

Your Majesty, I guess you may have heard
of me.

My name is Arthur Stark.

Arthur? My God, who did it?

The militants?

I've got the camera for me.

No! Arthur, no!

I've got your message, Doctor.

A million tons this way coming this way.

Let's get out of here.

No, we're miners, ain't we? Get your
shovels and follow me.

Holy shit.

Everyone accounted for?

What's wrong?

Come on, what is it?

Wayne? Slim said he saw someone go down
there.

What?

It was a little girl, Arthur.

No. They found this.

Oh, my God.

They couldn't stop her, Arthur. She was
crying and acting like a mad thing.

What's the gas we down? Two minutes,
maybe less.

Please, don't do this, Albert.

Give me that budgie.

You haven't got a chance in hell.

That's my daughter down there.

Well, of course, Al's got it.

Welsh accents are professional.

It's okay, honey. Daddy's here.

You okay?

It's gonna be the three of us.

You and me and...

Let's

touch. This whole thing's gone too far.

Come on, where is he, Wayne?

Even a thousand militants broke into the
dynamite store.

They took all the dynamite and they're
headed for Sellafield. My God, they're

going to blow the nuclear reactor.

Who are they?

Look after Tammy for me.

Slim?

Yes, sir?

I need your bike.

ready for you, Mr. Scargill.

Thanks, son.

I hand -machined every part of it
myself, Mr.

Scargill. I know.

She's got the heart of a lion in the...

fastest trade union leader you will ever
see.

What do you think, Mr. Goldstein?

Strike. The bloodshed begins, black on
red, in bold.

And down the bottom here, he led the
miners, but she led him.

Okay, are you working on a film called
The Strike, which has been described as

film which may or may not save the
British film industry?

How's it been going?

Um, I don't know. I'm just here to sell
a picture.

A man.

A woman.

A strike.

They want to strike McGregor. You'll
miss one day of work, Scargill, and this

miner dies.

Strike after strike!

Strike.

The bloodshed begins.

Strike.

Strike. At a cinema near you.

And now, to Strike, the film that many
critics are claiming to be the best

gentle film of the year.

It's a love story about a guy who
believes in love, I guess.

That's the film.

The character of Dutch is really a very
macho part, which I found something with

talent.

This isn't the way, Dutch.

Too late, Arthur.

Time for talking is past.

It's either coal or nuclear power.

Which side are you on?

Listen, guys, just give me one hour to
win this strike. For all of us. I think

we're all a little tired of your fancy,
moderate ideas, Arthur.

Right, boys?

Yep. I want to sort this thing out right
here and now. Come on, I'm begging you,

Dutch. One lousy hour, that's all I
need.

Okay, if I don't succeed, go ahead.

Well, I think they're Mars.

How does Sam Hillary supposed to know
whether or not you succeeded?

Anyone got a radio?

Right here.

Okay.

Radio four. Three o 'clock. Today in
Parliament.

Come on.

One eye, Dutch.

One eye.

Eliminations for the best makeup artist
who did nothing for these two guys

behind me are Johnny Craig for Space
Rats and Lettuce.

Walt Cannon for Bludgeon 3.

Zippy Gazelle for Strike. And the winner
is Zippy

Gazelle for Strike.

The nominations for Best Actress are
Peggy Ashcroft for Back in India.

And Miss Meryl Streep for Psych.

Which way to

London? Well, the road to London is that
way.

But if a man was in a hurry,

he'd drive straight through that
graveyard

yonder. Thanks, Pop.

Remind me to put a gate in that fence,
boy. And the award for the best comedy

performance goes to Slim O 'Reilly.

Not down there.

The

nomination

for this car bumper is as follows.

Jack Nicholson, the dentist in Stab Me I
Love You. Jack Nicholson.

Lee Maugham as Colonel Gaddafi in
Bolivian.

And Al Pacino where his portrayal is
Arthur Scumbag in Strike.

Let him speak.

Gentlemen, I want to apologize to this
house for this intrusion, but I think

you'll understand when you hear what I
have to say.

Mr. Scoggle?

You may have your say.

Mr. Speaker, is that a wool sack you're
sitting on?

Yes, young man, it is.

My old daddy told me about that wool
sack.

He was a strange old gaffer.

He believed a lot of strange things, did
my old daddy.

He believed in the dignity of labor and
loyalty to his fellow man.

But above all,

He believed that that old sack, that
simple bag of ancient wool,

symbolized everything that makes our
country the greatest democracy in the

world.

Are you guys on the right?

Are you guys on the left?

Is my daddy wrong?

Is he wrong to believe all those things?

I don't think so.

Because I want to tell you, gentlemen,
out there,

In every narrow street, in every
northern town, there's thousands of guys

my old daddy.

Men who want to work, want to be proud.

Men who would follow you gentlemen to
hell and back if you so demanded.

And all I ask in return is a little
faith, a little trust.

Is that too much to ask?

Gentlemen, I'm sure a lot of you have
children.

Children who love you.

Take your God even.

I have a little girl.

Her name's Tammy.

And like a lot of six -year -olds, she
sure asks a lot of tough questions.

Just like a mama.

Well, last night, she came to me and...
She asked me a question I...

that this father could not answer.

She said to me, um... Daddy, will you
always be a coal miner?

I... I looked at her.

It was the kind of worst moment of my
life.

And, uh...

Kind of small tears rolling down her
cheeks, you know?

And as I held her then so close... I

vowed I would come here and sort this
thing out.

Because you gentlemen, and only you, can
answer my daughter's question.

That's all I've got to say.

Thank you, Mr. Speaker. I'm all through.

Well, uh, gentlemen, you've all heard
what, uh, Mr.

Scoggle has had to say.

I think it's time we took a vote on this
matter.

He's done it!

Well, Mr. Scoggle, I think you should go
home and tell little Tammy that...

miners can go back to work.

And

in

future, Mr. Scoggle, I think this house
would appreciate it if you conducted

your business in a more formal manner.

We have a country to run.

Thank you, sir.

God bless the United Kingdom.

God bless us all.

You can do it.

Come on, Tammy. That's my girl. Come on.

Welcome to the House of Commons, Tammy.

You have a very brave dad, Tammy.

I know.

Thank you, Prime Minister.

Don't tell me you're gonna get Charles
Bronson to play the part of Ken

Livingston.

Where do you think you're going, then?
We're going to see the film, innit? Hey,

you know, projectors broken down here.
Yeah?

Take your girlfriend up to see Bambi up
the old inn here. She's already seen

Bambi, man. Go on, on your bike.

The

old

hometown looks the same As I step down

from between and there to meet me is my
mama

and pa down the road

I look and there runs Mary hair of gold

and lips carries it's good to touch the
green

They'll all come to meet me, arms
reaching,

smiling sweetly.

It's good to touch the green, green
grass of home.

The old house is still standing, though
the paint

is cracked and dry.

And there's that old oak tree that I
used to play on.

Down the lane I walk with my sweet Mary.

Hair of gold and lips like cherries.
It's good to touch

the green.