All language subtitles for The Comic Strip 04 Consuela

England! Ah, England! At last, darling.

Yes, at last, darling.

I'm so excited, darling.

Yes, it's certainly great to be
returning home with a wife.

Oh, you are sweet.

I feel we've only known each other for
such a short time, and yet there's so

much I ought to know.

About Brownstokes, for instance.

Well, it's a fine old house. It's been
in the family for centuries.

The sort of place that needs a woman,
really.

Luckily, we've... No, I'm only too happy
to be that woman, darling. I think

you'll be surprised how quickly I can
learn housekeeping.

Well, no, you won't have to, darling.
Oh, I can hardly wait. I want to make a

list right away. I'll probably need to
clean right through.

Yes. I suppose Beth and Bertha might
take a little while to get used to you.

Beth and Bertha?

The dogs!

Oh, well, I love dogs.

Daddy's home.

Oh, Jessica.

Any

minute

now, you'll see it.

Happy to meet you, madam.

The master informed us only yesterday
that he had married and that a new

mistress was coming to the house.

Well, it's very nice to meet you.

Hello, Consuela. Look, would you suit
everything for me? I just want to take

dogs for a quick walk. Yes, sir.

But, darling... But, darling... Oh, you
must understand, Jessica.

I've been away for a while.

Want to give the place a bit of a recce.

And Bess and Bertha haven't seen me for
months.

Consuela will look after you.

This way, madam.

Helping me, shall I?

Follow me, madam.

It's easy to get lost.

Oh, these are charming.

I do love art.

Oh, bliss.

I do love sky.

No,

madam, only me.

Oh!

Don't go in that room ever.

I'm sorry, I didn't. This way, madam.

Consuela is charming.

I think she and I are going to be great
friends.

Morning, darling.

You're up early.

Actually, I didn't sleep.

I suppose I'm not used to coming out in
the bed, tossing and turning.

Oh, I'm sorry. I tried so hard not to.

Morning, Consuela.

Morning, Mum.

Perhaps I could just have a cup of tea.

So, what have you got on the agenda for
today?

Well, just getting to know the place a
bit, I thought.

Perhaps you could show me around later.

Yeah. Well, actually, I've got a hell of
a lot on today.

There's a whole estate organisation.
People don't realise it takes a lot of

bloody hard work on my part.

You're a state manager, sir.

Ah, Richard.

Just the chap.

Morning, John. How was the trip?

All right.

Bloody hectic.

Sorry to have been away so long.

Everything been all right?

Yes, fine.

Good. Right.

Well, it's nearly eight o 'clock. I'd
better get on with my round. I thought

start with a check on the sea potato
stock.

Well, the potatoes were planted last
month.

Right.

They've already been planted. Right.

Well done.

Well, what do you suggest we start with
then, Richard?

Well, everything's pretty well been
taken care of.

Uh, I only popped in to say that there's
nothing really to do today.

I could pick up a tractor.

What about the, um... Oh, what's the
word? Um, peasants, you know.

Pheasants?

No, no.

They live on the estate. They work on
the farm and everything. Oh, tenants.

Tenants, tenants. Yes. Well, now, I've
been implementing the new rent

equalization and cottage renovation
schemes. Great.

Oh, by the way, Richard, um, this is my
new wife.

Um... Jennifer.

Jennifer? How do you do, Mrs. Saunders?
How nice to meet you.

No, please, don't get up.

Madam appears to have fallen over, sir.

Don't worry, I'll see to her.

Can't swear they've ever been married.

Who'd marry someone with a face like
that? Back end of a horse.

Does she have a dog, then?

Bloody hope not.

Morning, there.

Morning, Mr. Saunders.

Been away a bit, have you, sir? Yes,
that's right. A year.

Oh.

Is that, uh, swedes you've got planted?
No.

Potatoes. Yes?

Those are just sunflowers, sir.

Sunflowers. Great.

Oh, well done.

Press on.

Local chaps.

Wonderful fellows.

Great characters.

So she lives alone?

Yes, as far as I know.

Why?

Nothing, nothing.

Anything you need, madam?

No, I was just passing on my way into
the village, Consuela.

Oh, well, I'll have the horses saddled
up immediately.

No, I don't ride, actually.

The first Mrs. Saunders always rode into
the village.

How are you today?

Very well, Mrs. Tattle, and how are you?

Oh, I'm better now, thank you. Good.

And how is young Beverly and the poor
little one?

How kind of you to ask. And this, I
assume, is the new young miss up at the

manor that you've told us so much about?

Yes.

The new Mrs.

Saunders.

Hello, dear.

Hello, Mrs. Tattle. I expect I'm going
to be well the way to the visitor here,

so I've made up... It should be lucky to
have you, lovely Consuelo, to look

after her.

What more could a newlywed want?

I've made up the list, Mrs. Tatler, and
I expect... Don't be bothered.

Potswiller always folds the order in to
the manner.

Ah, Consuela.

Um, do sit down.

I don't fit, madam.

Well, the point is, Consuela, um, I
really don't think that we can expect

carry on with your rather heavy duties,
a woman of your age.

Um, and so, as mistress of the house, I
shall be interviewing four butlers this

afternoon. Yes, madam.

I know the perfect person.

No, you don't, Consuela, you don't,
because I shall be seeing the... The

and I have already had this
conversation, madam.

And we have chosen a butler for you.

Hey, Chiquito!

This is my beloved son, Julio.

He is your butler.

I'll leave you to give him his orders.

Right, well, I'll have a gin and tonic,
Julio.

Oh, sexy, sexy.

That'll be all. Thank you, Julio.
That'll be all. Thank you very much.

Oh, John!

John, I... I want to talk to you.

John seems so distant.

It's just so nice to have someone to
talk to, Richard.

Well, it's an honour to know you,
Jessica.

Thank you.

I mean, what for John?

Having so much on his mind, perhaps.

And being in that house... It's
claustrophobic, isn't it? Yes.

I'm sure it's just my imagination.

Jessica?

Yes, Richard?

Do you know what this is?

No, Richard, I don't.

It's my shoulder.

And it's yours.

Any time that you want to use it.

Well...

Goodbye Yeah, goodbye

Richard Thank you for

being my friend

Refreshment, madam.

You startled me.

Something, something outside startled
me.

What was that?

It was something horrible, something
strange, something chilling.

It was like a huge, enormous beetle.

I think you'll find it's your
imagination, madam.

It wasn't my imagination.

Gosh, I'm famished.

I just fancy a scotch egg and salad.

Anyway, I don't want to keep you from
your duties, Consuela.

I shall just pop into the village and
pick up John's shoes from the cobblers.

I've taken care of that, madam.

They're in his wardrobe.

Oh, good.

Well, I shall get some flowers to
arrange, then. The house looks so drab.

that this morning, madam.

Thank you, Consuela.

Then I shall be able to go out this
afternoon and sketch some ducks.

Took the liberty, madam.

The point is, darling, please try and
listen, darling.

The point is, it's not my imagination.
Some fairly strange things have been

happening. I mean, I know I've been
feeling alone, but I'm not getting

I would just like to feel mistress of my
own house, and she keeps blocking me.

And the point is, please try and listen,
darling, because I just don't think I

can stand it much more. Oh, calm down,
woman.

What you need is a bloody baby.

Give you something to do.

Oh, darling, what a blissful idea.

Yes, a child made for my love.

Oh, yes, I can see it now.

We'd need a nanny, wouldn't we? Because
Consuela's far too old, yes.

She'd frighten the children, that old
battle -axe.

You're a toilet, madam.

Good night, Bill.

Night -night, Consuela.

John, they can't find my pill.

Oh, how sweet.

He's probably hidden them already.

Get out.

Get out of my way.

I love this. It's perfect.

It's box.

Oh.

Oh, poor darling.

Mummy went on, it's poor, didn't she?
Poor, poor darling.

Poor darling.

To remind you, I've had the dinner
party, madam.

Dinner party?

I took the liberty of inviting a few of
the master's friends for dinner tonight.

I beg your pardon?

Eight o 'clock.

Formal wear.

I have laid a gown out for you.

Will there be anything else, madam?

No, that'll be all.

Seriously. Yes, seriously.

We always get a chalet. And this year,
there's that stupid old car.

Oh, the teacher.

Awful. Oh, tell the story, Jeremy. Do
the voice, go on.

Right, it was so fun.

Because there was this teacher. She was
a teacher.

She had the chalet. And she wasn't at
all, I mean, seriously unattractive.

And we were having such fun. I thought
everybody's judgment of the key.

Thank you Richard.

trying to poison me. I know you are.

The first Mrs. Saunders was always very
happy for me to sprinkle her

contraceptive pill on the food every
day.

We don't want any unwanted babies, do
we?

I mean, I'm not a sexist or racist or
whatever it is, but I work in South

Africa. I've got lots of friends with
me, so there's no trouble at all. You

do anything you want there, and so can
they. You can't ride on a black bus.

Are you totally sure about that? Because
you can in Kenya.

John, John, I think you've got some
explaining to do. I mean, who was your

wife? What happens in that room? Who
lives in that house? A bloody great

I suppose.

What's the matter, Consuela?

I don't know, sir. Oh, yes, yes.

I thought you two might be in league.
Because, you see, she was trying to

me. She was trying to make me look bad.

Tom, Richard. She wouldn't let me do
anything. Help me get her upstairs. She

wouldn't let me do anything.

Is that really necessary, sir?

I can do that, sir, with my nurse's
training.

Thank

you,

Richard. For what?

For driving me to the station.

No, that's all right.

Will you be all right on your own? Yes,
yes, I just had to get away for a while.

You understand?

Yes, I understand.

Of course you understand.

Of course you understand.

We understand, Dan. Look, I'm sorry
about last night. I must have seemed

a... Raving, demented lunatic? Yes, yes.

No, you didn't seem like that at all.
Look, tell John I'll phone him when I

reach London. I shall. Take care. I
shall.

Thank you for being so... Dependable?
Yes.

to come and see you tomorrow.

All right, I'll look forward to it.

Bye.

Darling.

Darling.

Come in.

You look wonderful.

Oh, it's my new image. Do you like it?

It's charming.

Sit down.

How are you? I'm fine. No, really. Are
you really?

Yes. You've been having a difficult
time, darling.

Oh, well, just things getting on top of
me, that's all. Listen, darling, I want

you to know you're a very loved person.

You can always tell me everything.

I don't want you to worry any more.
You're going to be taken care of. And

there's someone else who, believe you
me, loves you very much.

Come in, sweetie.

Hi, Jesse.

She's obviously dangerous from what your
maid says, so be careful, and I'll call

back in a couple of days. Thank you,
Doctor.

I'll take you back into town.

Consuela will look after her.

John? John?

Help me!

Hello? Hello?

Hello? Richard?

Operator? Hello?

No.

No, the Windows Office just brought the
wires down.

Something terrible has happened, sir.

Madam has had a fit.

She's on the roof.

She's not herself.

Oh, bloody hell!

Why can't she just pull herself
together, for God's sake?

Well, I suppose I'll have to go and see
her.

I was going to go and see the dogs.

Here, take this.

Consuela.

Oh, I was at mass, sir.

Yes.

Yes, of course.

Oh, thank you. Thank you, Consuela.

Stop!

Who are you?

Please help me.

What have I done?

Oh, dear, madam.

It would appear that you have murdered
your husband.

The mad woman killed her husband.

You couldn't cope, could you?

Why don't you make it easy for yourself?

Go on. Look over the side.

This is my mother, my sacred sick
mother.

From the day I boarded the boat at
Torremolinos, leaving my poor family,

barely eking out a living from the pig
-dog English torrent.

They come to our beautiful country.

They drink our wine. They throw up on
our women.

John would never dream of going to tour
Molinos

She was trying to seduce me.

these people.

Yes, I had to.

My friend, John.

And you killed Mrs. Lopez.

Oh, Richard, you understand?

You are not.

You're a murderer.

No.

Oh, my God.

What will the neighbours say?

Oh, Richard.

Oh, this is awful.

I'm going to be sick.

Oh, Richard.

Darling, sweet Consuela.

Richard, it was an accident.

You have killed four people. I know.

I'm going to call the police. I'm sorry.

I'm going to call the police. Richard,
don't leave. Richard.

Richard.