Original subtitles

Introducing... Come on, you're running on me. I've never seen anyone

like it.

Ooh, look at this fancy hidden camera.

How can I look at it if it's hidden?

What?

Magic bookshop.

Hey, how are you doing? Good, how are you? Doing great.

Okay.

House of Blessings. Yeah, nice bottle and bottle.

All right, does it have a... We had a sale today.

We have $2 off, $5, $10, and $20, depending on the sticker. Oh, okay.

we got these back into the redactors.

A lot of people calling about those. What is that?

Oh yeah, you've never seen these little machines?

No. Oh yeah, lawyers use them and stuff to redact information.

You see how it makes a laser beam?

But there's three settings.

For one, you see how there's all numbers here?

The first setting, if you had a contract or something, and you didn't want

anyone to see the numbers or checks or something, you set it to that first

setting right here.

And then when you aim the laser at numbers,

it will, look at that, it inks them.

Isn't that great? Can you undo it? No.

Oh. Yeah, once it's redacted, it's redacted. Yeah, so no one else.

That would be a good one, though, to undo it.

Yeah. They have to. I mean, come on. And then the second setting is personal

information. Here, you want to try that? See that? Like if something has

personal info on it.

Oh, like, look, here's an invoice.

Like if you aim that laser right here, nothing happens, but you see there's an

address up there with personal info?

Aim it at that.

Yeah. Damn. Isn't that wild? That is so cool.

We redacted. Yeah. Super cool.

Yeah, and then the other one is for the third sentence setting is like

if there's obscene stuff, you know, like in books and you don't want to write

that. Yes, exactly.

It'll, but I don't know how that, why can't I get that to? That's amazing.

Oh, there we go.

Did I get it? It's going to redact you.

Oh, it redacted you.

Oh.

What was that? We'll be dead.

Did you get a shock just now? I felt a shock, yeah. Whoa, yeah.

Don't aim it at people.

Is my shirt ruined now?

It totally redacted it.

Oh, I thought it was only a paper thing.

I'm sorry.

That's so weird.

Maybe it programmed your voice like it knew to get rid of that word.

I'm just waiting for this to load up and then I'll ring you up. Okay, cool. How

much is this nifty machine just for... Oh, it's $59 .95.

And then I think it's supposed to have, oh, I don't remember what the number off

was. Okay, no, it's okay. Yeah. I was just wondering, like, price range -wise.

Exactly. And I have a coupon in this book. Okay. So I'm going to go grab

Thank you. So when that's loaded up.

All right.

The redactor.

How are you guys doing?

Good. How are you? Good. You see me browsing around a little? Yeah. Not here

the signing, are you?

There's a timing?

4 o 'clock. John McKay from the Live Longer, Live Better. Oh, really? Yeah,

tomorrow they're doing the book on assassinations.

Huh? That's one of the... Oh.

Oh, that's neat.

Yeah. Yeah, there's little toys and stuff in there to kind of, like, make

reading experience better.

A little more exciting.

Yeah, the darts and this is, like, our sick.

Oh, my God. That's hilarious.

It's pretty crazy, yeah.

Oh, yeah, and one of those.

I think it's called a garrotte.

So he's coming later, you said? Yeah. Oh, that's neat. Yeah, it's like, I

you just... Oh.

Well, that's scary.

Oh, there's a... Wow, that one.

Yeah, that's pretty dangerous.

Yeah, but it's a good book. There's, like, a section on poison.

There's a section on... Oh!

There's one on guns, too, yeah.

Gosh, I felt that blow right by my ear. That was so weird.

Oh, my God, it's caught on fire. It literally just, wow.

Okay, that's a, be careful with.

Was that supposed to do that? No, I don't think it's supposed to. Did that

right through the book? It went right through the book.

Wow. Yeah, that's the revolver section.

So, we should put a warning on these probably.

I'm going to, excuse me, I'm going to put a warning. We got to get a warning

the assassinations books.

Thank God, this place changed. It went right through his head.

Did we hurt somebody?

No.

How you doing?

Great. All right. Great.

And they wanted to get a free chocolate with you, too. I don't know if you like

dark chocolate. Yeah, I do. Grab one of those hearts.

The whole heart?

Yeah, you can take one with you because you're buying a book.

They're these new things.

called flutters of love there's like a toy inside oh okay like breaks open yeah

i haven't opened one yet but they said there's like a hollow heart and then

inside they make a toy made of chocolate also so when you when you break it

there they break it open and then you reach inside and you find your oh

dude it's a legit butterfly oh my god that i had no idea

there holy that's crazy

Whoa.

Okay, so I'm sorry.

I hope I get one of those. Yeah.

That was epic.

Wow.

Okay. Yeah.

So don't shake it. Yeah, I guess don't shake it. I don't know how long it'll

stay alive in there.

Maybe there was a whole thing about how to care for them, but I'll grab your

directions on that, and I'll be right back.

Where's it?

Mary. These things were... You know the... That was great.

You just can't hear it in there.

Hey, how you doing? Good, good. All right, great.

Okay, I'm just going to check that because we had a couple of issues with

pages. Sometimes they go off.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, are you going to want a new one if there was a bookworm in that?

I have no idea. I didn't even know that existed.

Bookworms, yeah.

For real? Yeah, we have a thing with them. If it rains, they come in.

I don't think it's damaged, is it?

No, I mean, it might have left a little streak or something.

Oh, yeah, they're in there.

There might be another copy. I don't see any more.

Yeah, is it all right if I just get another copy? Yeah, at least they're not

eating it. But, like, other books, like this one here, sometimes it depends on

the... Is there any in here?

No.

None in there.

That looks good, right? Yeah. That's what we do. We check them all now and

sure there's nothing in there.

That's the first time I've ever seen that.

You've heard of bookworms. Yeah. But these pages that aren't glossed, I

shouldn't do this. They'll eat right through them. Yeah, you throw them in

there.

They'll eat right through that. Look at that. How fast they'll... They gnaw at

it. Look at this.

They're quick.

Oh, crap.

Yeah, they recall like a thousand books already from our place.

Let me get you a better copy of that. I appreciate it. Sorry. I'm really sorry.

Hang on.

Oh, hey, how are you? Good. All right, just this? Yeah. All right.

I think this might be one of the new books with the... Oh, yeah, this is

This has the little chip in it.

You see this? Kind of get that little chip on the spine, sort of reflective.

And those work really well with the Japanese wooden bookmarks.

Yeah, so you're going to want to have one of these.

Have you ever seen these little guys?

No. Okay, well, it's a flat bookmark, and it has a matching microchip on it,

it's made of a very thin wood. Can you feel that?

Oh, it is wood. Yeah, it's wood. It's actual wood, I know. It's very thin like

paper. But they code each book with the same code that goes on top of here. So

if you have one that has a chip in it, into the book like a bookmark, and then

you just give it a second there and you can almost hear the sound.

Oops, see that?

Yeah, it'll chip it and carve it into.

Something that matches the book.

That is insane.

Isn't that cool?

Yeah. Not all the books have them, but they're pretty cool. Most of the newer

series, like anything, most hardcover books will have it. Here's an Exploring

the Ocean book.

As long as it has the chip and the side of it, it'll match up. That looks

insane. Put that one in there.

Give that a shot. Let's see.

There it goes.

The egg.

Get all that stuff out of there.

Yeah, it's got microblades between the pages.

Let's see what it did.

Oh, that's nice.

That's insane.

Yeah.

Adds a little bit of fun, you know, to reading, so.

Yeah. How the hell is that? I know, right?

Because it's just the chips. Like, we looked. We were trying to, like, figure

out if all of the books have, was it Kama, Kama Sutra? Mm -hmm.

But let's try that one.

There's a 60 different... It's already going.

Oh, yeah.

And then the string's stuck there.

A penis.

Oh.

I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.

Yeah. Oh, that is awesome.

I'm really sorry about that. Yeah.

Okay.

I got to, let me, I got to, actually, I put these in the children's section and

I have to move them. Just give me two seconds. Guys, the Kama, whatever this

book is here.

Today I play a surgeon.

All right, not really, just the cafeteria server.

But, you know, similar.

Can I just get a cheeseburger, please? Cheeseburger, you got it. All right.

One second, I'm just in the middle of grass cutting here.

Got to feed the beef, you know.

Cool. Yeah.

You've had grass -fed beef, right?

I've heard of that. Oh, yeah. All our burgers are grass -fed beef.

I never thought about what that meant, to be honest.

Oh, yeah. Well, we feed it ourselves here because it's just like the

get in. It's a lot cheaper. Yeah. But they absorb quicker and everything, so

it's a lot easier for us.

So I'm going to feed them right now.

If you cut your own grass, it's going to want to eat it. Oh, that's cool.

You could just sort of push it into it a little bit like that.

You know, and then it kind of, you see how it like. Yeah.

Oh, whoa.

Yeah. It's sort of like.

That is interesting.

It like absorbs.

Yeah. Yeah.

Cool. You know, but it's like. Oh, that's so weird.

Yeah. The beef actually has the muscle memory still of. That's crazy.

Of eating grass.

Oh, my God.

It's like alive.

Yeah, it is. Is it alive?

I mean, it's rare, but it does have sort of a lifelike, I admit, situation.

You sort of feed it in there.

That's crazy. Yeah, again, it's about a pound of that right there.

Yeah. Yeah,

it's kind of chewing it, you know? Yeah, that's...

This is the weirdest thing I've ever seen.

Oh, yeah? Yeah.

Well, you've heard of that before.

I've just seen grass -fed beef on menus, but I literally never thought about it.

Right, you just never saw them hand -feeding it. Yeah. It's better when it's

hand -fed.

It's kind of like grain -fed, you know? Yeah.

There it goes.

Yeah, it'll absorb almost all of it, you know?

Like a weird organism.

Yeah. Wow.

Yep. That is trippy. Yeah.

Chicken nuggets and fries.

Chicken nuggets and fries, okay.

I'm going to make the nuggets individually, okay?

We do them, we hand cook them.

Oh, that's awesome. I've never seen that before.

Oh, yeah, it's better because it's fresh.

Okay. Yeah,

I got the frozen ones here.

Let me turn this on.

Yeah. We're wasting too many because, like... It's bizarre not everyone buys

nuggets, and then they're all cooked, and then they just go to waste. You just

throw them away.

Right. All right, you just take a whole bunch of them, and then the hand cooker,

you just hold it over it like this.

That is

amazing.

It just cooks them right up.

Isn't that great?

I've never seen that before. Oh, these are awesome. You can cook anything with

it.

The home ec department loves those. Uh -huh. Fries, you said, right? Yeah. Oh,

yeah.

Fries. Yeah, the home ec department has a whole course where they teach how to

make different things, you know, with this. You can get these.

You know, they're going to be putting them out for purchase.

They have a book on, like, a...

A complete way to... That is amazing, yeah.

Handmade meals.

Uh -huh. And plus also... Who would have invented that?

Should be a millionaire.

Right. And it's simple to use this stuff. There's this great one for... Oh!

That was on. Sorry.

This is regulated a little high. I'll make you a couple more of those. Okay.

Hang on one second.

Jimmy, this is regulated too high.

Hi. Can I have a slice of pizza, please?

A slice of pizza? Sure. Yeah. And then do you also... Can I get a side of

greens? Do you have that?

A side of greens?

Yeah.

I have mixed. I might have... Do you want just green?

Yeah, if you had that, that'd be great.

Okay. Let me see what I could do.

Yeah, I'm not sure he has any... Peas okay?

Just the peas, I guess.

Yeah, just peas? Yeah. Okay, cool. I could do that.

Yeah. A lot of people like just the greens.

What's your name?

Jason. Jason? Yeah.

All right.

Okay. Put it in a to -go container for you.

Okay. All righty.

So first I'll just put them in mix.

Sure.

And just peas is okay, though?

Yeah. Yeah.

Just a green diet, right?

Yeah. Okay, cool.

Yeah. Close that up.

Yeah, we have to separate a lot of stuff for the kids here. Sometimes they don't

like it all mixed, but here, I'll do that a little.

They're all weighted a little bit differently, all the veggies, so I kind

hit, and then little taps.

Does that really work?

Yeah, it really works. You just dice the carrots in a certain way so that they

tumble, the peas being round.

And the carrots being square, they can separate.

So you could just eat the peas.

Oh, my God.

Yeah. I don't know why that's so impressive to me, but that is crazy.

Yeah. I mean, they make them that way on purpose because a lot of people like...

Sure. No, that makes sense. Some people like this, some people like that. So,

you know, it's easier for us to, instead of...

Having to mix them when people want mixed, it's much easier to just separate

them. Honestly, when I first saw you put, like, the full mix into the

I was like, why is he doing that?

Oh, yeah.

But that's... I stand corrected. I mean, damn.

Okay, cool.

Yeah, and, um... Oh, I spelled... I think I might have spelled your name

here.

Unless the J moved over when I shook it. I don't know.

Let me just, I'm going to reheat this because this has been sitting out a

minute. I'll be right back.

They said it's because it's so much like muscle. It is actually stimulated by

food. It's flubber. Oh, my gosh.

Ah! That is so... Woo -hoo!

Mmm.

Walden. Synthetic. Edible.

Protein substance, just like grandma used to make.

She was a microbiologist.

So this is Food Lab 5.

This is where they test a lot of the new food products and things.

And we have to clean up an experiment they were doing.

They have a food substance that kind of gets used as a base.

Well, let's put some gloves on.

Okay, here you go.

before you handle it. But yeah, none of them really taste quite right, and it's

really the texture of it inside your mouth.

So this stuff, this was the protein substitute that they were making. It's

a meat base.

And see how it kind of has, you see those, like, fibers in there?

That's kind of like, was mimicking, like, muscle fiber.

But what they did is they ran, like, electricity through it to try and, like,

make the patterns of the goop make, like, a muscle structure.

Okay, so here's what we're going to do. We're going to toss this because it's

been opened.

Okay, so I'm going to bring this over here.

And if I tip this over here, can you pull the goop on out of there?

Yeah, there you go.

This is like big shoe to me. Yeah. Remember that? Yeah, that's the color of

right?

Yeah, it's good stuff.

Oof. It's like, I want to smell like bacon. Yeah.

Yeah, it's kind of sexy. I'll have to ask about that. Well, they're going to

get, they said to put the containers here.

So they're going to get rid of the container.

Yeah. And then that... Air cycle or whatever.

Yeah. Oh, my God. Look at that stuff.

Gross. Oh, have you ever... It's like the silly putty kind of... You know, you

know what swells in there, too?

Yeah. It starts to almost kind of swell up once it hits the air. Yeah.

That was actually one of the problems they were having with it.

My air freshener up in here.

I know, right? That smell, it's pretty bad, right?

And they... Okay, so these must have gotten used already.

So, yeah, they get into some intense stuff when they're running tests on the

stuff. I'm glad they don't make us wear these things.

There's another one over there. Will you grab that one for me? Yeah.

Yeah, we'll throw that one away.

I'll take that.

Terrific.

All right.

Let me get this out of here.

Oof.

That smells pretty bad.

All right, now we can take the gloves off.

So that's much better. I don't have to worry about that.

Oh, there's this part too.

This is what they said they were doing that was the reason they had to stop

making it.

Because they were running this test with strawberries.

And I saw them do it. It's pretty weird. Because they were trying to mix the

meat into other food substances to actually cook with it. But it reacts.

Here, you do this. This is pretty crazy.

Here, hold that.

Okay, yeah.

Almost like you're feeding a dog.

Watch, when I start to pour it.

Oh, look, there it goes. Oh, my God.

What is going on in there? I know, it's like it reacts to the food.

Oh, I can, like, feel it.

Yeah. Oh, that's so weird.

That's so creepy. Oh, my God.

I'm never going to eat tofu again.

They said it's because it's so much like muscle, like human meat. Like, it wants

to eat as well, so it is actually stimulated by food.

Flubber. So...

We should definitely sanitize. Run away.

Yeah. There's a sanitizer right here.

I'm going to, I'll push it down and you can put it on your hands.

Always best to like sanitize a little bit.

Okay, good.

All right. Much better.

Yeah. But that is the craziest kind of stuff, right? So weird.

I know that it would be. Oh.

Where is it?

It ran away.

Holy.

Like out hunting.

That is so crazy. Oh, wait.

Oh, look.

Oh.

Wow. Be careful. That is really strange.

Oh,

my God.

Wow.

Oh, my God. Okay.

Someone needs to throw all this.

That is really, really weird. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's like moving the

table. Should I throw the towel? I'm throwing this out. Oh, my God.

That is nasty.

Oh, my. It looks like the slime is like filling the suit.

Okay.

That's gross. I can't believe it was like moving like that.

Okay.

I... Oh, my God.

I'm going to get this out of here.

Oh, my God. Hold on. Will you tell... Actually, you know what? Don't tell him.

Stay where you are. Stay where you are. I'll get it out. I'll just... Okay.

Shoot. Ew.

Ew, it's, like, moving. Ew, we should get out of here.

Oh, my God.

I say we get out of here.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Come here. Come here.

Oh. Can we leave? Oh, my... Oh, my God. That is too... Oh, my God.

Oh my God.

Do you know what? We should go in the containment room. Come here. This is

in here.

Oh my God, no. Let's get out of here.

It's like filled that suit up.

Okay, hold on a minute.

Holy... Yeah.

Oh my God.

That's great.

Thanks, Matt.

It's like moving like a human.

That's got like... That's like the Carbonaro effect. That's locked, right?

that's locked. We're safe. That's got to be like the Carbonaro effect, right?

Making that do that?

Do you know what that is? The Carbonaro effect?

Spaghetti Carbonaro?

No.

It's the name of a hidden camera magic TV show.

What? A hidden camera magic TV show.

There's a hidden camera.

You're on a hidden camera. No, I'm not. Yes, you are.

Yes, you are. No, I'm not.

My name is Michael Carbonaro. I'm a magician.

Oh, my God. What the f*** is that?

Wave to a slime.

Oh, my God.